If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Think Progress)   Candidate in VA governor's race campaigns on attempting to restore unconstitutional ban on oral sex and sodomy. Tag: By tying it to child molestation   (thinkprogress.org) divider line 44
    More: Asinine, Virginia, child molestation, political campaigns, oral sex, Attorney General of Virginia, Virginia General Assembly, Cuccinelli, public sex  
•       •       •

2017 clicks; posted to Politics » on 17 Jul 2013 at 4:43 PM (51 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-07-17 05:32:26 PM
7 votes:
I'm visiting your beautiful state tomorrow. Lets 69 each other.
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com

I'm sorry Jessica, I believe oral sex is illegal.
images.politico.com

Wow, you are odd. I guess I'm going to go NC and contact hugram then.
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
2013-07-17 06:03:00 PM
6 votes:

Rev. Skarekroe: Aarontology: I think we really are at the point where "social conservative" has become a noun to describe someone who is constantly thinking about f*cking children.

No, see, this guy is constantly thinking about f*cking other men.  He just wants you to think that he's thinking about f*cking children


 Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli II went to a therapist  and said "Doc you got to help me I keep having this dream and it is driving me  crazy."
"What is this dream;"
"I dream I am having sex with a kid'"
"Okay is it a boy or a girl"
"A girl of course, what do you think I am some kind of pervert."
2013-07-17 04:48:30 PM
6 votes:

Jackson Herring: James!: And it would just be struck down again.

much like my boner


Your boner will become more powerful than we can possibly imagine?
2013-07-17 03:00:06 PM
5 votes:

Aarontology: I think we really are at the point where "social conservative" has become a noun to describe someone who is constantly thinking about f*cking children.


No, see, this guy is constantly thinking about f*cking other men.  He just wants you to think that he's thinking about f*cking children.
2013-07-17 08:08:31 PM
4 votes:

James!: Arachnophobe: Jackson Herring: James!: And it would just be struck down again.

much like my boner

Your boner will become more powerful than we can possibly imagine?

It'll be just an empty robe and eventually reappear with a bunch of other dead penises as a hologram.


Mine was later digitally replaced by Hayden Christiensen.
2013-07-17 05:26:36 PM
4 votes:
You can take away oral sex when you can pry my cock from her cold, dead lips.
2013-07-17 09:34:16 PM
3 votes:

fusillade762: Mine was later digitally replaced by Hayden Christiensen.


Well, at least it's now a huge dick.
2013-07-17 05:16:05 PM
3 votes:

Serious Black: If a bunch of Farkers want to corn hole my mother, that's between them and her. I'll warn you that she's not much to look at after polio farked her up good as a kid.


www.nobodygoeshere.com
2013-07-17 05:07:51 PM
3 votes:
And the GOP goes on about how it wants to create jobs!
2013-07-17 05:04:45 PM
3 votes:
Virginia is for boring lovers
2013-07-17 05:04:42 PM
3 votes:

The Muthaship: James!: The Muthaship: The Why Not Guy: How proud you Republicans must be.

Anybody who proudly states they are a member of either major party is a moron.

Are both sides bad?

No, both sides a terrible.


Call me when both sides are trying to make blow-jobs illegal. Until then I'm voting Democrat.
2013-07-17 05:01:10 PM
3 votes:

Serious Black: Just to play devil's advocate a bit, how far does consent stretch? Would you support, say, letting somebody consent to being slaughtered and eaten?


Killing someone is a bit more permanent then, say, half the posters here corn holing your mother.
2013-07-17 02:22:14 PM
3 votes:
I think we really are at the point where "social conservative" has become a noun to describe someone who is constantly thinking about f*cking children.
2013-07-17 06:00:32 PM
2 votes:

mediablitz: You can take away oral sex when you can pry my cock from her cold, dead lips.


I prefer you can take away oral sex when you pry his hard cock from my warm, wet mouth.  Of course I'm coming from a different perspective :P.
2013-07-17 04:52:34 PM
2 votes:

Aarontology: I think we really are at the point where "social conservative" has become a noun to describe someone who is constantly thinking about f*cking children.


Shiat, if that's all it takes to be a social conservative, then I suppose I'm a social conservative.
2013-07-17 04:50:17 PM
2 votes:

Arachnophobe: Jackson Herring: James!: And it would just be struck down again.

much like my boner

Your boner will become more powerful than we can possibly imagine?


It'll be just an empty robe and eventually reappear with a bunch of other dead penises as a hologram.
2013-07-17 04:41:21 PM
2 votes:

James!: And it would just be struck down again.


much like my boner
2013-07-18 02:25:39 PM
1 votes:

fusillade762: jjorsett: Bloomberg can tell you how much soda you can buy or how much salt can be added to your food, so there's really no reason somebody else can't tell you what kind of sex you're allowed to have, is there?

Last I heard oral sex doesn't make you fat or give you diabetes.


What if I'm sucking the Kool-Aid Man's dick, huh?
2013-07-18 02:38:12 AM
1 votes:

AdolfOliverPanties: "My view is that homosexual acts, not homosexuality, but homosexual acts are wrong. They're intrinsically wrong. And I think in a natural law based country it's appropriate to have policies that reflect that. ... They don't comport with natural law."

Most animals engage in homosexuality.  Are animals not natural?  In fact, homo sapiens is the only species that both engages in homosexual acts and then actually gives a shiat about it.  THAT is what is unnatural.


Eh, animals kill each other for stuff related to mating all the time, especially mammals.  We're not really all that special in the 'giving a shiat' department either.

Also, this is a bad argument because nature is a horrible thing that wants to kill us all and the entire existence of our species in its current form is rightly a never-ending quest to get as far farking away from a natural state as possible without destroying our own food supply.  Homosexuality being natural is an association that implies that it's worse for humanity than we thought, not better.

//Next time you're out for a walk in the woods "enjoying nature" remind yourself that most likely the actual natural state of the area you're in is a flat plane where the vegetation is regularly purged by raging wildfires.  If you're enjoying the natural sounds of the river remind yourself that a river is "naturally" a trap for predators to catch and eat shiat in the middle of the food chain like plains apes.  Nature can farking suck it in more than just the aforementioned literal sense.
2013-07-17 11:57:23 PM
1 votes:

Gyrfalcon: encyclopediaplushuman: Aarontology: I think we really are at the point where "social conservative" has become a noun to describe someone who is constantly thinking about f*cking children.

And f*cking animals, don't forget about the animals. Because we all know the gay lifestyle is a slippery slope to bestiality....and then to polygamous robotic necrophilia bestiality

You say that like it's a bad thing.


Hey, if they're dead who cares?
2013-07-17 11:41:12 PM
1 votes:

encyclopediaplushuman: Aarontology: I think we really are at the point where "social conservative" has become a noun to describe someone who is constantly thinking about f*cking children.

And f*cking animals, don't forget about the animals. Because we all know the gay lifestyle is a slippery slope to bestiality....and then to polygamous robotic necrophilia bestiality


You say that like it's a bad thing.
2013-07-17 10:36:25 PM
1 votes:

Aarontology: I think we really are at the point where "social conservative" has become a noun to describe someone who is constantly thinking about f*cking children.


And f*cking animals, don't forget about the animals. Because we all know the gay lifestyle is a slippery slope to bestiality....and then to polygamous robotic necrophilia bestiality
2013-07-17 09:50:27 PM
1 votes:

JohnnyC: There must be some conservatives on fark ready to defend their party on this one... come on. Which one of you are going to step up?!


I think they're all still busy White Knighting Ted Nugent two threads up.
2013-07-17 09:21:44 PM
1 votes:

Pants full of macaroni!!: Jello Biafra was right.  Banning anything sexual is how social conservatives masturbate.  It's all about control.


dammit, now i have "holiday in cambodia" back in my earworm...
2013-07-17 09:10:23 PM
1 votes:

Scaevola: toomuchwhargarbl: Calvinists.

No. Cuccinelli is a hardcore Catholic like Santorum.


So basically the Catholic church pays no taxes but now they're begging us to make their guys stop buggering children?
2013-07-17 09:10:15 PM
1 votes:
Peki:

Otherwise, I really enjoy giving blowjobs. I'd rather not go to jail for them.

Not sure if you are male or female, but allow me to say this:

Don't ever change.
2013-07-17 08:39:02 PM
1 votes:
There must be some conservatives on fark ready to defend their party on this one... come on. Which one of you are going to step up?!
2013-07-17 08:32:31 PM
1 votes:

o5iiawah: Cant they just write it into the law that it only applies to children?   For Farks sake I have no idea what the angle is on this one.


Courting the Hate Vote, not realizing that people full of hate are a minority.  Hell, if the GOP knew that bigots were a minority, they'd probably try to cut their funding and keep them away from the polling stations through churlish hijinks.

Holy hell, maybe there's an idea blossoming here.
2013-07-17 08:09:58 PM
1 votes:

spongeboob: current Catholic positions


Missionary?
2013-07-17 07:18:06 PM
1 votes:

cynicalminion: FormlessOne: theknuckler_33: I like how these morans have co-opted the term "natural law" in a desperate, juvenile attempt at covering up their homophobia.

I just wish they understood that "natural law" includes homosexuality, as such relationships have been documented in human behavior for thousands of years. It's a null term, really - there's no "supernatural law" that stands in opposition, as pretty much ANYTHING WE DO is covered by a "natural law."

oh i wish there was a "supernatural" law that included homosexuality... mmmm, deancest.


and as an added bonus, they've got this friend they call momma cass... :D
2013-07-17 07:14:38 PM
1 votes:

FormlessOne: theknuckler_33: I like how these morans have co-opted the term "natural law" in a desperate, juvenile attempt at covering up their homophobia.

I just wish they understood that "natural law" includes homosexuality, as such relationships have been documented in human behavior for thousands of years. It's a null term, really - there's no "supernatural law" that stands in opposition, as pretty much ANYTHING WE DO is covered by a "natural law."


oh i wish there was a "supernatural" law that included homosexuality... mmmm, deancest.
2013-07-17 07:07:44 PM
1 votes:

FormlessOne: theknuckler_33: I like how these morans have co-opted the term "natural law" in a desperate, juvenile attempt at covering up their homophobia.

I just wish they understood that "natural law" includes homosexuality, as such relationships have been documented in human behavior for thousands of years. It's a null term, really - there's no "supernatural law" that stands in opposition, as pretty much ANYTHING WE DO is covered by a "natural law."


Homosexuality has been documented in every mammalian species.  All of them.  It's more natural than traditional marriage or monogamy.
2013-07-17 06:08:18 PM
1 votes:

red5ish: I don't think banning blow jobs is going to be popular.


Well maybe popular with married women, hey maybe this is Republican outreach to women.

/He really doesn't want to give his wife head so he will make everyone suffer.
2013-07-17 05:52:21 PM
1 votes:

Blues_X: And the GOP goes on about how it wants to create jobs!


Dammit you!!! This was a brand new keyboard!!
2013-07-17 05:13:17 PM
1 votes:
It would be hysterical if he got caught up in one of those gay sex scandals that bedevil Republicans.

"I was only on that website looking for a strapping young lad to help me with my luggage.  I'm not interested in licking honey off his rippling abominals or something like that.  I also have no idea where that lube came from."
2013-07-17 05:10:15 PM
1 votes:
For as slutty and promiscuous as liberals supposedly are, I've never met anyone who thinks about sex more than social conservatives.  And for as much as they think about it, their views of sex are wildly unrealistic.  They're the late night Cinemax of politics.
2013-07-17 05:08:22 PM
1 votes:

Kredal: The way the law is written, it would make it a felony for normal, heterosexual, consenting adults to have oral sex too.  Ken Cuccinelli doesn't like blow jobs.


There was a case a few years ago in GA where someone was convicted under the GA sodomy laws for oral sex.  When the prosecutor was asked why these sorts of prosecutions weren't more common, his response was "I would imagine there's a high rate of recidivism."
2013-07-17 05:03:45 PM
1 votes:

vygramul: An FBI agent once said that EVERY child predator owns substantial Star Trek memorabilia. It would make it easier to convict them by making that stuff illegal.

/It's because men who prey on children have things children like, not because there's some actual connection


Uh oh. I better take my blueprints down and hide my music box and phasers. :(
2013-07-17 05:03:43 PM
1 votes:

Serious Black: Aarontology: I think we really are at the point where "social conservative" has become a noun to describe someone who is constantly thinking about f*cking children.

Shiat, if that's all it takes to be a social conservative, then I suppose I'm a social conservative.


Finally, my internet sting yields fruit! Boy, the chief is gonna give me a promotion for this!
2013-07-17 04:58:53 PM
1 votes:
I don't think banning blow jobs is going to be popular.
2013-07-17 04:55:31 PM
1 votes:
If his wife ain't giving head no ones wife can give head
2013-07-17 04:51:32 PM
1 votes:
Laser like focus on small government.
2013-07-17 03:05:40 PM
1 votes:

Kredal: The way the law is written, it would make it a felony for normal, heterosexual, consenting adults to have oral sex too.  Ken Cuccinelli doesn't like blow jobs.


That is the stated point.

Kenny refuses to answer the question, though, if any of the sex he's ever had runs afoul of this proposed law.

AdolfOliverPanties: "My view is that homosexual acts, not homosexuality, but homosexual acts are wrong. They're intrinsically wrong. And I think in a natural law based country it's appropriate to have policies that reflect that. ... They don't comport with natural law."

Most animals engage in homosexuality.  Are animals not natural?  In fact, homo sapiens is the only species that both engages in homosexual acts and then actually gives a shiat about it.  THAT is what is unnatural.


Also, several animal species engage in sex for fun/pleasure - oral, anal (I think) and mutual handjobbery (or flipperjobbery, or paw...you get the point).
2013-07-17 03:01:38 PM
1 votes:
If you tell someone with their head up their ass to go fark themselves, can they perform oral on themselves at the same time?
 
Displayed 44 of 44 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report