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(Springfield News-Leader)   Meet today's idiot parents, panhandling for gas money/fireworks, depending who you ask, while their baby sits in a car seat wrapped in a blanket, inside a locked van. Wait til you hear about their house   (news-leader.com) divider line 70
    More: Dumbass, Amanda L. Colgrove, Dodge Caravan, car seats, dirty diaper, city limits  
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11111 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Jul 2013 at 11:27 AM (39 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-15 10:31:49 AM
I think it may be time to spay and neuter.
 
2013-07-15 10:40:13 AM
"You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car... Hell... you even need a license to catch a fish... but they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a parent."
 
2013-07-15 10:41:08 AM
In addition to a soiled diaper, the infant had dirt under her neck and fingernails,

So...on her back?
 
2013-07-15 10:47:35 AM
Uh... those aren't parents

/they're just breeders

Sybarite: I think it may be time to spay and neuter.


And THIS^
 
2013-07-15 10:52:10 AM

blatz514: In addition to a soiled diaper, the infant had dirt under her neck and fingernails,

So...on her back?


No, babies are small fat gross people, they have double chins/neck creases.  Somehow they manage that and cute, while the guy beside you on the subway can't do it.
 
2013-07-15 11:26:07 AM

Sybarite: I think it may be time to spay and neuter.


THIS. First thing I thought "we need to sterilize these people."

Unfortunately, a civilized society does not practice Eugenics. But sometimes....!!!
 
2013-07-15 11:30:26 AM

EvilEgg: blatz514: In addition to a soiled diaper, the infant had dirt under her neck and fingernails,

So...on her back?

No, babies are small fat gross people, they have double chins/neck creases.  Somehow they manage that and cute, while the guy beside you on the subway can't do it.


Althought some babies look like old drunk fat men from the subway.
 
2013-07-15 11:32:23 AM
"it looked like she had rolled around in a dirt garden"

WTF?  Have I been doing it wrong all this time?

I have a vegetable garden - do I need to plant a dirt garden first, and then harvest the dirt, and then plant the vegetables in said dirt?  I'm confused, News-Leader.com A Gannett Company, please help me!
 
2013-07-15 11:32:51 AM
At age 18 every man woman sold be given the option of a free, surgical painless irreversible vasectomy or tied tubes in exchange for one free new model car of their choosing.
 
2013-07-15 11:34:40 AM
The temperature was about 84 degrees, and the baby was in a child safety seat wrapped in a heavy fleece blanket, according to a probable cause statement.

I often wonder what is with a good number of people who are obsessed with wrapping babies up "in case they get cold". No matter what the weather is like, they think they have to dress an infant up from head to toe and wrap it in a blanket. If it's really hot out, you just stick the kid in a diaper with perhaps a t-shirt. And then you might get some idiot saying "Oh, she looks cold, she needs a blanket." The kid is better off being a little cold than overheating.
 
2013-07-15 11:36:30 AM
Hmmm, a dirt garden would be much easier.
 
2013-07-15 11:36:33 AM

FrancoFile: "it looked like she had rolled around in a dirt garden"

WTF?  Have I been doing it wrong all this time?

I have a vegetable garden - do I need to plant a dirt garden first, and then harvest the dirt, and then plant the vegetables in said dirt?  I'm confused, News-Leader.com A Gannett Company, please help me!


You've got to get a good dirt garden going first so that you'll only be using top level soil for your precious vegetables. Here's mine:

howtobuildahouseblog.com
 
2013-07-15 11:37:45 AM

Metaluna Mutant: At age 18 every man woman sold be given the option of a free, surgical painless irreversible vasectomy or tied tubes in exchange for one free new model car of their choosing.


I didn't think you could sell man woman legally in the United States, or have the Republicans finally repealed the 13th amendment.
 
2013-07-15 11:38:50 AM

Metaluna Mutant: At age 18 every man woman sold be given the option of a free, surgical painless irreversible vasectomy or tied tubes in exchange for one free new domestic model car of their choosing.


FTFY
 
2013-07-15 11:38:56 AM
You buy cigarretes, beer porn anything, clerks should be required to ask, Do you want condoms with that?

/anything to keep babies from repeating the cycle
 
2013-07-15 11:39:18 AM

EvilEgg: blatz514: In addition to a soiled diaper, the infant had dirt under her neck and fingernails,

So...on her back?

No, babies are small fat gross people, they have double chins/neck creases.  Somehow they manage that and cute, while the guy beside you on the subway can't do it.


This.

Also, unlike the guy next to you on the subway, babies can shiat themselves in public or urinate on people without causing major upset.
 
2013-07-15 11:41:05 AM
But..but...

imageshack.us
 
2013-07-15 11:41:39 AM

Pray 4 Mojo: "You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car... Hell... you even need a license to catch a fish... but they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a parent."



That's not how babies are made.
 
2013-07-15 11:41:55 AM
Colgrove told police she had lost the syringe that came with the medicine, and was not "good at math".

Yes, if only she had paid attention that day in math class when they went over how to keep your syringe.

At least she looks like she's good at meth.
 
2013-07-15 11:42:50 AM

darth_badger: Pray 4 Mojo: "You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car... Hell... you even need a license to catch a fish... but they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a parent."


That's not how babies are made.


What about brown babies?
 
2013-07-15 11:43:24 AM

Sybarite: I think it may be time to spay and neuter.


Eugenics.
 
2013-07-15 11:43:41 AM

Zulgaines: FrancoFile: "it looked like she had rolled around in a dirt garden"

WTF?  Have I been doing it wrong all this time?

I have a vegetable garden - do I need to plant a dirt garden first, and then harvest the dirt, and then plant the vegetables in said dirt?  I'm confused, News-Leader.com A Gannett Company, please help me!

You've got to get a good dirt garden going first so that you'll only be using top level soil for your precious vegetables. Here's mine:

[howtobuildahouseblog.com image 850x367]


That's a mighty fine crop of dirt you have going there! You'll be up to your neck in dirt soup for months!
 
2013-07-15 11:44:14 AM
Seriously. take that child away. Give it to someone else who wants the baby and will care for it. But what in heaven's name is wrong with folks? Piles of human feces? Staph infections?

I knew folks like this when I was 10 or 11. Even then I was able to look at it and say, man that's wrong. Does education help? Or does it just not register? I think it was George Carlin who said: Think of your average stupid person... 50% are stupider than that.
 
2013-07-15 11:45:19 AM
Metaluna Mutant


At age 18 every man woman sold be given the option of a free, surgical painless irreversible vasectomy or tied tubes in exchange for one free new model car of their choosing.


Prefer giving meth or crack instead. We have enough crazies on the roads already.
 
2013-07-15 11:48:03 AM

geometer: Colgrove told police she had lost the syringe that came with the medicine, and was not "good at math".

Yes, if only she had paid attention that day in math class when they went over how to keep your syringe.

At least she looks like she's good at meth.


Hey, it's a start!  Or end...
 
2013-07-15 11:48:16 AM
Two neglected baby stories in one morning? I need to snuggle with my dogs who are apparently better cared for than too many children. *sigh*
 
2013-07-15 11:52:11 AM
Greene County?  Surprised it wasn't the Greene County in Pennsylvania.  Those two look like they'd fit right in.

/where men are real men, and the sheep are satisfied
 
2013-07-15 11:53:44 AM

Metaluna Mutant: At age 18 every man woman sold be given the option of a free, surgical painless irreversible vasectomy or tied tubes in exchange for one free new model car of their choosing.


I'm good with this, but I'd rather just give them cash.  The car will end up in a junkyard, or on blocks in someone's back yard, in short order.  The cash will quickly cycle back into the public and be put to good use.
 
2013-07-15 11:58:47 AM

silo123j: Does education help? Or does it just not register?


"And people... if you leave milk out, it can go sour. Put it in the refrigerator... or failing that... a cool, wet sack."

"Milk... in... refrigerator. Hmm... makes sense."
 
2013-07-15 11:59:25 AM

silo123j: Seriously. take that child away. Give it to someone else who wants the baby and will care for it. But what in heaven's name is wrong with folks? Piles of human feces? Staph infections?

I knew folks like this when I was 10 or 11. Even then I was able to look at it and say, man that's wrong. Does education help? Or does it just not register? I think it was George Carlin who said: Think of your average stupid person... 50% are stupider than that.


Paraphrasing Bob Dobbs, methinks...
 
2013-07-15 12:05:14 PM
Dang, that's some weapons-grade stupidity there.  They should NEVER get those kids back, and they (as Sybarite said above) should be spayed and neutered.
 
2013-07-15 12:06:11 PM

Sybarite: I think it may be time to spay and neuter.


I say do this to everybody at birth, then earn your right to reproduce later on.
 
2013-07-15 12:06:50 PM

Metaluna Mutant: At age 18 every man or woman sold should be given the option of a free, surgical painless irreversible vasectomy or tied tubes in exchange for one free new model car of their choosing.


i641.photobucket.com
 
2013-07-15 12:07:14 PM

SecretAgentWoman: Sybarite: I think it may be time to spay and neuter.

THIS. First thing I thought "we need to sterilize these people."

Unfortunately, a civilized society does not practice Eugenics. But sometimes....!!!


A lie that still sells well despite so much evidence to the contrary.

At the very least one should have to get a permit and pass screening to have children legally. We screen parents for viability after the children are born (typically after something rotten has happened), why not be proactive?

Of course, that brings up a whole new area of enforcement problems. What does one do about illegally birthed children? The only prevention for which is sterilization of unfit parents, thus bringing us into conflict with popular sentiment about "procreation rights". And of course not solving the problem of children already born to non-qualifying parents.

So do we restrict procreation for the sake of civilization, accepting all the complications that come with such efforts, or do we let the mouth-breathers continue spawning more chaos and suffering?

Tough question. I lean towards a third, less spoken of, option. The extermination of the whole pathetic, pestilential species.
 
2013-07-15 12:13:24 PM
Am I the only one who expected to find out they have a McMansion?
 
2013-07-15 12:14:00 PM

bmihura: Sybarite: I think it may be time to spay and neuter.

I say do this to everybody at birth, then earn your right to reproduce later on.


Well, that's be great, but how would you un-do that?
 
2013-07-15 12:14:26 PM
What happened to the other kids? Did I just miss the part where they took the others and left them with the most defenseless creature of all? Or are the others back in the crap-ridden, staph-infested shiathole where these people were found last month?
If only there were a hell....
/I would pay them to be sterilized if they were part of my family tree
 
2013-07-15 12:19:07 PM
Couldn't finish the article.  Disgusting ....
 
2013-07-15 12:21:33 PM

Agent Smiths Laugh: SecretAgentWoman: Sybarite: I think it may be time to spay and neuter.

THIS. First thing I thought "we need to sterilize these people."

Unfortunately, a civilized society does not practice Eugenics. But sometimes....!!!

A lie that still sells well despite so much evidence to the contrary.

At the very least one should have to get a permit and pass screening to have children legally. We screen parents for viability after the children are born (typically after something rotten has happened), why not be proactive?

Of course, that brings up a whole new area of enforcement problems. What does one do about illegally birthed children? The only prevention for which is sterilization of unfit parents, thus bringing us into conflict with popular sentiment about "procreation rights". And of course not solving the problem of children already born to non-qualifying parents.

So do we restrict procreation for the sake of civilization, accepting all the complications that come with such efforts, or do we let the mouth-breathers continue spawning more chaos and suffering?

Tough question. I lean towards a third, less spoken of, option. The extermination of the whole pathetic, pestilential species.


But you can get an exemption to have a third child if the military thinks he'll have what it takes to defeat the Buggers.
 
2013-07-15 12:21:51 PM

darth_badger: Pray 4 Mojo: "You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car... Hell... you even need a license to catch a fish... but they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a parent."


That's not how babies are made.



Doctor's say that butt pregnancies happen all the time.

splitsider.com
 
2013-07-15 12:26:04 PM
Can we just have them both shot and their bodies dumped in the ocean?
 
2013-07-15 12:26:32 PM
Hey, I'm not good at math either but I know dirty and sick kids + drugs + filthy home = jail time.

Life's a dirt garden
Dig it
 
2013-07-15 12:27:42 PM

Pray 4 Mojo: "You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car... Hell... you even need a license to catch a fish... but they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a parent."


Whoa.
 
2013-07-15 12:32:14 PM

radiovox: Can we just have them both shot and their bodies dumped in the ocean?


I vote for this if only to take the negotiated forced sterilization as an arbitration resolution.
 
2013-07-15 12:32:47 PM

offmymeds: Sybarite: I think it may be time to spay and neuter.

Eugenics.


It's not eugenics if they've already spawned. Article says three times so far. It's too late, those genes have been passed to a new generation, born in this century, tempered by war, disciplined by a hard and bitter peace, proud of our ancient heritage, and unwilling to witness or permit the slow undoing of those human rights to which this nation has always been committed, and to which we are committed today at home and around the world.

Now, sterilizing this charming couple would be a benefit to their community. Hell, to Out Nation as a whole, and to spare other children the indignities suffered by the first three.
 
2013-07-15 12:33:29 PM

darth_badger: Pray 4 Mojo: "You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car... Hell... you even need a license to catch a fish... but they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a parent."


That's not how babies are made.


It's how lawyers are made.
 
2013-07-15 12:35:54 PM

FrancoFile: Agent Smiths Laugh: SecretAgentWoman: Sybarite: I think it may be time to spay and neuter.

THIS. First thing I thought "we need to sterilize these people."

Unfortunately, a civilized society does not practice Eugenics. But sometimes....!!!

A lie that still sells well despite so much evidence to the contrary.

At the very least one should have to get a permit and pass screening to have children legally. We screen parents for viability after the children are born (typically after something rotten has happened), why not be proactive?

Of course, that brings up a whole new area of enforcement problems. What does one do about illegally birthed children? The only prevention for which is sterilization of unfit parents, thus bringing us into conflict with popular sentiment about "procreation rights". And of course not solving the problem of children already born to non-qualifying parents.

So do we restrict procreation for the sake of civilization, accepting all the complications that come with such efforts, or do we let the mouth-breathers continue spawning more chaos and suffering?

Tough question. I lean towards a third, less spoken of, option. The extermination of the whole pathetic, pestilential species.

But you can get an exemption to have a third child if the military thinks he'll have what it takes to defeat the Buggers.


Peh...I'm not willing to rely on another organic species to solve the human problem. It is time to embrace the purity of the machine!
 
2013-07-15 12:36:48 PM

Pray 4 Mojo: "You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car... Hell... you even need a license to catch a fish... but they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a parent."


I don't think that's how babby is formed.

I know it's a quote.

geometer: Colgrove told police she had lost the syringe that came with the medicine, and was not "good at math".

Yes, if only she had paid attention that day in math class when they went over how to keep your syringe.

At least she looks like she's good at meth.


I think "lost" should have been in quotes there.
 
2013-07-15 12:38:15 PM

Metaluna Mutant: At age 18 every man woman sold be given the option of a free, surgical painless irreversible vasectomy or tied tubes in exchange for one free new model car of their choosing.


Cars for men, shoes for women.  No more barefoot  & pregnant.
 
2013-07-15 12:40:31 PM

silo123j: I think it was George Carlin who said: Think of your average stupid person... 50% are stupider than that.


Which as embarrassing to hear from George; he should know what a median is.
 
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