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(NHK World (Japan))   Help a farker's dream come true, DIT   (nhk.or.jp) divider line 36
    More: Spiffy, Morning Musume, J-Melo  
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444 clicks; posted to FarkUs » on 14 Jul 2013 at 9:10 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



36 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-07-14 08:00:58 PM  
Hi, I have a huge favor to ask.  
If you could go to the linked article and answer the four questions with "staplers", in complete sentences, and maybe attach a cute picture of yourself with a stapler, I'd really appreciate it.  I've been a fan of this group since the 90s, and they've never had a song even mention staplers.  It'd be a dream come true for me if it happened.
 
2013-07-14 08:06:59 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-07-14 08:07:29 PM  
Like this, Subby?

Q1. What do you want more than anything else in the world?

I want staplers more than anything else in the world.

Q2. What does it mean to love?

Love to me means loving staplers.

Q3. When do you feel truly alive, and what does it mean to be alive?

I feel truly alive when I'm using a stapler. Being alive means living for my staplers.

Q4. What's your message for Morning Musume? Write whatever is on your mind!

I've got staplers on my mind.
 
2013-07-14 08:09:42 PM  

Lorelle: Like this, Subby?


Yes, that's fantastic.
 
2013-07-14 08:11:15 PM  

staplermofo: Lorelle: Like this, Subby?

Yes, that's fantastic.


!!

Why???
 
2013-07-14 08:14:38 PM  

Lorelle: Why???


Because I want them to sing a song about staplers, and I think posts like that are the chance for that to happen.
 
2013-07-14 08:15:30 PM  
I'm not sure what's so complicated about this.

farm3.static.flickr.com
 
2013-07-14 08:17:25 PM  
Sorry, the link is the thread starting thing, with the headline and whatsit.
 
2013-07-14 08:17:51 PM  
I love big busted staplers that don't work, I can not lie!
 
2013-07-14 08:18:58 PM  
Certainly my friend.

Q1. What do you want more than anything else in the world?

A stapler that has a citrus juicer built in.

Q2. What does it mean to love?

It's a truly transcendent experience very comparable to the feeling you had when you received your first stapler in life. That's just hard to describe but if yours was a Swingline you know what I mean.

Q3. When do you feel truly alive, and what does it mean to be alive?

When I'm using my stapler, of course.
You couldn't be alive and a sentient being without being able to use a stapler. Unless you were handicapped and that would just be so damn sad.

Q4. What's your message for Morning Musume? Write whatever is on your mind!

My friend used to staple his sheet music together. One day he realized that the song was printed on both the front and the back of the pages.
Boy was he embarrassed. Improper stapler use is quite revealing about a person, don't you think?
 
2013-07-14 08:26:33 PM  

Wanebo: Certainly my friend.


Thanks!
 
2013-07-14 08:26:38 PM  
Lorelle:

Wanebo:


I lol'd.
 
2013-07-14 08:38:28 PM  
If you guys are hurting for pictures, feel free to use any of these:
www.staplermofo.com

www.staplermofo.com

www.staplermofo.com

www.staplermofo.com

www.staplermofo.com

www.staplermofo.com
 
2013-07-14 08:43:26 PM  
I've been trying to get in contact with Kate Upton, and I keep getting these pesky cease and desist orders.  Can someone hook me up with her so I can take her to a hockey game, get a bite to eat, and engage in a little light bondage?

Thanks, you guys are the best.

/submitter
 
2013-07-14 09:06:59 PM  
subby, you are an odd one, but farkers have "helped" me out before so...

Q #1 To staple a million dollars to my wall that holds all my various staples
Q #2 Love is to a stapler what a staple is to paper (?)
Q #3 To be stapling away with my trusty stapler because I am unique in my staple existence. Staple!
Q #4 Staple me a song, not a sad song, but an upbeat staple song instead! Please include as many staplers and staples as possible!

I even sent one of your pics-

hope it helps (you weirdo :-)
 
2013-07-14 09:07:35 PM  
Wow...green.
 
2013-07-14 09:10:34 PM  
Thanks modmins!
 
2013-07-14 09:12:55 PM  
Here's a link to an old Fark thread featuring stapler porn, inspired by Subby.
 
2013-07-14 09:19:37 PM  
Q1. What do you want more than anything else in the world?
For Swingline staplers to get off their high horse and donate to lesser staplers across the world.

Q2. What does it mean to love?
To staple every bit of one's body, mind, and spirituality to another being.

Q3. When do you feel truly alive, and what does it mean to be alive?
Holding my staple gun, stapling insulation to the walls to provide warmth and security from the vicious attacks of the outside world. To have the power to join forces is to truly be alive.

Q4. What's your message for Morning Musume? Write whatever is on your mind!
 Every day you wake up you must ask yourself, "Where would we be without staplers?"
 
2013-07-14 09:42:48 PM  
(sung to the tune of Yesterday by the Beatles)

Stayp-uh-lers.... stapahlurs oh stay-pa-luhrs staypahlurs staaaaypuhlurz
oh stay-pu-lurz, stayyyy PUH lurzzz

Now sing that to yourself, over and over and over, in that high pitch Japanese 'kawaii' girly voice.

Over.
And over.
and over.  All day.  Everyday.  Non-stop.  When you are trying to sleep.  When you are trying to read.  When you are having sex... ok this is Fark, that last one won't be happening, but you get my point.

Only then will you know the true joy of Seppuku.

\oh God, I really can't get it out of my head.  Serves me right, I guess.  GAAAAAH
 
2013-07-14 10:25:35 PM  
Wow, I clicked the link and was all set to make a "weeaboo" comment, but now I see comedy potential.
 
2013-07-14 10:34:05 PM  

I Like Bread: but now I see comedy potential.


They're a fun group.  One of their big hits prominently features flashing disco urinals for their big bathroom dance scene.
 
2013-07-15 12:59:43 AM  
Transmission sent...
 
2013-07-15 01:00:41 AM  

ksdanj: Transmission sent...


Thanks!
 
2013-07-15 01:08:52 AM  
The AW in me is disappointed in not being acknowledged.
 
2013-07-15 01:09:46 AM  

jaylectricity: The AW in me is disappointed in not being acknowledged.


Sorry.  Your entry was awesome and appreciated.
 
2013-07-15 02:19:51 AM  

staplermofo: I Like Bread: but now I see comedy potential.

They're a fun group.  One of their big hits prominently features flashing disco urinals for their big bathroom dance scene.


You should be ashamed of yourself for listening to such things.

They do look nice though.
 
2013-07-15 02:39:02 AM  

gfid: They do look nice though.


4 of them are under 15!
 
2013-07-15 03:04:36 AM  

staplermofo: gfid: They do look nice though.

4 of them are under 15!


I just meant the ones that are of legal age...uh, I mean their mothers.
 
2013-07-15 04:18:55 AM  
1. I want to live in a world where everyone has a nice stapler. Its important to keep documents together.
2. Paperclips and binder clips come in all kinds of colours, but only a stapler can really help one stay organised, and that is why I love them . It means reliability and a constant force for good.
3. It means I am ready to hold reams of documents together, with one simple act.
4. I think you should really consider how far humanity has come since we invented the staple, and the stapler.

HTH, g. You have made me laugh really loud on a few occasions.
 
2013-07-15 04:24:09 AM  
Thanks alienated.
 
2013-07-15 05:27:18 AM  
Q1) More than anything else in the world, I want to trace my love like I trace the sensual lines of my Swingline stapler
Q2) Loving means not bending under pressure like a bad staple in a brick.
Q3) Being alive means using your stapler to punch through the difficult pages of your life and securing them tightly so they can be filed away forever.
Q4) Without staplers, there is no order.
 
2013-07-15 05:30:11 AM  
Thanks gadian!
 
2013-07-15 09:40:27 AM  

staplermofo: jaylectricity: The AW in me is disappointed in not being acknowledged.

Sorry.  Your entry was awesome and appreciated.


Haha...no worries, I was just messing around.
 
2013-07-15 11:14:16 AM  
cdn.ebaumsworld.com
 
2013-07-15 11:37:21 AM  

staplermofo: Lorelle: Why???

Because I want them to sing a song about staplers, and I think posts like that are the chance for that to happen.


I'd rather sing a song of six pence, a pocket full of pie, four and twenty blackbirds, all drunk on rye...
 
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