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(RealClear)   Seven terrible films featuring huge celebrities. Pros: Farker-driven, not a slide show. Cons: Battlefield Earth trailer   (realclear.com) divider line 170
    More: Stupid, humans, John Travolta, Alicia Silverstone, Chris O'Donnell, Van Helsing, Batman and Robin, minx, Sigourney Weaver  
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7570 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Jul 2013 at 12:53 PM (51 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



170 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-07-12 11:36:43 AM
No Holds Barred was a fantastic movie.
 
2013-07-12 11:42:12 AM
Alicia Silverstone and Sigourney Weaver in "Vamps" (2012)

First, I don't think anyone has thought of Alicia Silverstone as a "huge celebrity" in well over a decade now. Second, I was wondering what ever happened to Amy Heckerling.
 
2013-07-12 11:59:41 AM
Travolta was a washed up has been until Tarrentino rescued him. He may be back on the B list again
 
2013-07-12 12:01:26 PM
Damn, list is blocked at work.

I'm guessing Ben Kingsley for the Love Guru

Michael Caine for Jaws: The Revenge

/Insert Caine house quote here
//That new one with De Niro and Travolta should be on there
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-07-12 12:01:48 PM
I continue not to hate Batman and Robin.
 
2013-07-12 12:31:25 PM

Mangoose: No Holds Barred was a fantastic movie.


Well, it had at least 2 reasons to see it:

www.wearysloth.com

GIS for "Joan Severance" and you'll see them more clearly (NSFW of course).
 
2013-07-12 12:33:52 PM

Sybarite: Alicia Silverstone and Sigourney Weaver in "Vamps" (2012)

First, I don't think anyone has thought of Alicia Silverstone as a "huge celebrity" in well over a decade now. Second, I was wondering what ever happened to Amy Heckerling.


I think Krysten Ritter has more celebrity cache than Silverstone these days.  In fact, I think I want to see that movie now just because she's in it.
 
2013-07-12 12:40:46 PM
This one is not on the list?
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-07-12 12:44:10 PM
I don't think I've ever seen any of those.

I may have seen parts of B&R, but that's about it.
 
jbc [TotalFark]
2013-07-12 12:45:10 PM
List fails without Denis Leary in "The Sandlot".
 
2013-07-12 12:59:34 PM
I liked Happy Gilmore and crazy-protractor-for-an-arm-man.  Other than that, Adam Sandler sucks.

That was my rant.  Thanks for reading!
 
2013-07-12 12:59:38 PM

scottydoesntknow: Damn, list is blocked at work.

I'm guessing Ben Kingsley for the Love Guru

Michael Caine for Jaws: The Revenge

/Insert Caine house quote here
//That new one with De Niro and Travolta should be on there


Neither one is on the list.

I don't look at Hulk Hogan as someone I would be surprised is a cast member in a shiatty movie.

It is a very trolly list.  It lists Adam Sandler, but only listed one piece of shiat movie he has been in.  Outside of a few, all of his movies have been ass.
 
2013-07-12 01:02:33 PM
Hey, it's another internet list of stupid pop-culture crap that has already been listed as stupid pop-culture crap about a gazillion times before, great! This is how Nazi Germany got started. :(
 
2013-07-12 01:05:39 PM

jbc: List fails without Denis Leary in "The Sandlot".


It's about good actors in bad movies, not bad actors in good movies.
 
2013-07-12 01:07:13 PM

TuteTibiImperes: Sybarite: Alicia Silverstone and Sigourney Weaver in "Vamps" (2012)

First, I don't think anyone has thought of Alicia Silverstone as a "huge celebrity" in well over a decade now. Second, I was wondering what ever happened to Amy Heckerling.

I think Krysten Ritter has more celebrity cache than Silverstone these days.  In fact, I think I want to see that movie now just because she's in it.


Amy Heckerling AND Krysten Ritter? How did I not hear of this earlier?
 
2013-07-12 01:10:43 PM
No Movie 43?

cdn.modernthrill.com
 
2013-07-12 01:11:51 PM
Eddie Murphy's entire imdb page since the Beverly Hills Cop 2.
 
2013-07-12 01:11:56 PM

AdolfOliverPanties: scottydoesntknow: Damn, list is blocked at work.

I'm guessing Ben Kingsley for the Love Guru

Michael Caine for Jaws: The Revenge

/Insert Caine house quote here
//That new one with De Niro and Travolta should be on there

Neither one is on the list.

I don't look at Hulk Hogan as someone I would be surprised is a cast member in a shiatty movie.

It is a very trolly list.  It lists Adam Sandler, but only listed one piece of shiat movie he has been in.  Outside of a few, all of his movies have been ass.


I guess they have a separate list for Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider.
 
2013-07-12 01:12:20 PM
 
2013-07-12 01:13:00 PM

TuteTibiImperes: jbc: List fails without Denis Leary in "The Sandlot".

It's about good actors in bad movies, not bad actors in good movies.


This. Plus I think James Earl Jones is a slightly bigger celebrity than Denis Leary...
 
2013-07-12 01:13:32 PM

PsyLord: No Movie 43?

[cdn.modernthrill.com image 351x262]


that's a Farrelly brothers movie, it's pretty much bad on purpose. That's not the same as a big budget, earnest and sincere POS.
 
jbc [TotalFark]
2013-07-12 01:17:53 PM

TuteTibiImperes: jbc: List fails without Denis Leary in "The Sandlot".

It's about good actors in bad movies, not bad actors in good movies.


It's about "huge celebrities", without any mention of acting skills, and "The Sandlot" was almost as unfunny as "Schindler's List".
 
2013-07-12 01:19:32 PM

InmanRoshi: Eddie Murphy's entire imdb page since the Beverly Hills Cop 2.


Unfortunately, there's a couple of Shreks in that list.

(but the other Shreks certainly quality)
 
2013-07-12 01:20:12 PM

WippitGuud: InmanRoshi: Eddie Murphy's entire imdb page since the Beverly Hills Cop 2.

Unfortunately, there's a couple of Shreks in that list.

(but the other Shreks certainly quality qualify)


FTFM
Kinda freudian, though
 
2013-07-12 01:25:18 PM

jbc: "The Sandlot" was almost as unfunny as "Schindler's List".


Haven't seen The Sandlot, but wow, that's not funny at all, not even a little bit.  Was it meant to be a comedy?  Is it Problem Child-level painful?

Will have to avoid.
 
2013-07-12 01:25:46 PM
Missing: The Godfather

/did not care for it
 
2013-07-12 01:27:16 PM
I thought Battlefield Earth was okay....
 
2013-07-12 01:30:43 PM
What, no Magic Christian?

About the worst movie you'll ever watch starring Peter Sellers, Ringo Starr, Marlon Brando, Walter Mattheau,..ugh, the list is just too long.
 
2013-07-12 01:31:56 PM

ferretman: I thought Battlefield Earth was okay....


There's always one person who does. I'm that way about Hudson Hawk.
 
2013-07-12 01:32:04 PM
Gene Hackman:

i2.listal.com
 
2013-07-12 01:33:49 PM
theseconddisc.files.wordpress.com

What's going on in this thread?
 
2013-07-12 01:33:51 PM

ten foiled hats: jbc: "The Sandlot" was almost as unfunny as "Schindler's List".

Haven't seen The Sandlot, but wow, that's not funny at all, not even a little bit.  Was it meant to be a comedy?  Is it Problem Child-level painful?

Will have to avoid.


I don't think it was intended to be a pure comedy.  There are funny moments, but it's more of a 'coming of age' movie.
 
2013-07-12 01:34:02 PM
Killing them softly. One of the few movies I couldn't finish.
 
2013-07-12 01:37:39 PM
It becomes more and more obvious that Scientology is messed up when you take what should be a ready made box office success formula. Aliens-taking-over-the-world-post-apocalyptic-nightmare shoot em up concept and screw it up as badly as they did with Battlefield Earth...
 
2013-07-12 01:38:29 PM
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-07-12 01:39:19 PM
There are people who dont like The Sandlot?  And Dennis Miller is a huge celebrity?
 
2013-07-12 01:39:25 PM

r1niceboy: ferretman: I thought Battlefield Earth was okay....

There's always one person who does. I'm that way about Hudson Hawk.


That's a good movie.

/Bunny! Ball ball!
 
2013-07-12 01:41:43 PM

Gunny Highway: There are people who dont like The Sandlot?  And Dennis Miller is a huge celebrity?


Both are news to me. Call them smalls, cause they're killing me.
 
2013-07-12 01:43:12 PM
And there's this gem:
www.moviezit.com
 
2013-07-12 01:44:42 PM

EvilEgg: Travolta was a washed up has been until Tarrentino rescued him. He may be back on the B list again


For which I'll never forgive Tarantino.
 
2013-07-12 01:52:13 PM

r1niceboy: ferretman: I thought Battlefield Earth was okay....

There's always one person who does. I'm that way about Hudson Hawk.


I own Battlefield Earth on DVD.  I classify it in the 'enjoyably bad' category rat-brain.
 
2013-07-12 01:53:00 PM
Holy Fark people, you want to know why movie 'A' or movie 'B' isn't on the list? Watch the footage from The Conqueror, it should take up all 7 positions itself. Seriously, John Wayne as Genghis Kahn, without bothering to lose the 'Aw, Shucks, ma'am' drawl? NO other movie with good actors can be this bad.
 
2013-07-12 01:53:36 PM
Caligula.
 
2013-07-12 01:53:46 PM

Stupid Guitar: What, no Magic Christian?

About the worst movie you'll ever watch starring Peter Sellers, Ringo Starr, Marlon Brando, Walter Mattheau,..ugh, the list is just too long.


On a whole, Magic Christian was bad but had some brilliantly farked up moments.

Like this one (NSFW)
 
2013-07-12 01:54:56 PM
Somebody is getting put into the camel clutch AND MADE HUMBLE for saying No Holds Barred was bad, BROTHER!
 
2013-07-12 01:55:35 PM
i41.tinypic.com
 
2013-07-12 01:55:41 PM
www.dvd-covers.org

Terrible, pointless movie, hugely forgotten.  However, it had the sheer dumb luck of getting star-studded roster, before most of them became known (this was 1995):
-Ben Affleck
-Sam Rockwell
-Matt Damon
-Matthew McConaughy
-Brendan Fraser
-French Stewart
-Alyssa Milano
-John Rhys-Davies

Only watched this movie because it was filmed at my alma mater (UC Santa Cruz) and the surrounding city.
 
2013-07-12 01:56:26 PM
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-07-12 01:57:07 PM

EvilEgg: Travolta was a washed up has been until Tarrentino rescued him. He may be back on the B list again


He himself once joked upon hosting SNL one time that (at the time) they'd had 400 shows and he'd had 5,000 comebacks.

/I will say I rather enjoyed Bolt
//far superior than Battlefield Earth
///Hell, ANYTHING is better than Battlefield Earth
 
2013-07-12 01:57:28 PM

Flappyhead: Caligula.


After two attempts I've never finished that movie. I shall not try again, and this coming from someone who sat through Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters and Zardoz.
 
2013-07-12 01:59:09 PM

Primitive Screwhead: Stupid Guitar: What, no Magic Christian?

About the worst movie you'll ever watch starring Peter Sellers, Ringo Starr, Marlon Brando, Walter Mattheau,..ugh, the list is just too long.

On a whole, Magic Christian was bad but had some brilliantly farked up moments.

Like this one (NSFW)


Goddammit, I actually meant to say Candy! It also had John Astin, Richard Burton, and John Huston. I get those two mixed up, but same difference.
 
2013-07-12 01:59:43 PM

Stupid Guitar: What, no Magic Christian?

About the worst movie you'll ever watch starring Peter Sellers, Ringo Starr, Marlon Brando, Walter Mattheau,..ugh, the list is just too long.


The Onion AV Club's write-up of that movie in the "My Year of Flops" project is really emtertaining.

I read a "behind-the-scenes in the film industry" book once that said one of Brando's costumes for that movie was so bad that he locked himself in his trailer and refused to come out over it until they reminded him that he had signed a legally-binding contract.
 
2013-07-12 02:00:10 PM

Whatthefark: [i41.tinypic.com image 270x317]


That prostitute vocal orifice that you own, close it.
 
jbc [TotalFark]
2013-07-12 02:04:39 PM
Another movie that sucked as hard as "The Sandlot" is "Holes", and Jon Voight and Sigourney Weaver still both owe us all apologies for that one.
 
2013-07-12 02:05:15 PM
upload.wikimedia.org

mysteriously absent

/for me, it was a tuesday.
 
2013-07-12 02:07:12 PM
The Sandlot wasn't that bad, then again I haven't seen it in over a decade. Granted she wasn't a big star then, but Jennifer Anniston in Leprechaun part 1...
 
2013-07-12 02:08:46 PM
Never saw Vamps, so I can't speak to that.

Battlefield: Earth and Batman and Robin deserve to be on this list because they were both movies that otherwise shouldn't have been horrible but were.

If you went to see Jack and Jill and not knowing exactly what kind of dreck you are going to be fed, then you have bigger problems than lousy movies.  That being said, I actually saw that movie when it was free on tv and it really wasn't *that bad*, not nearly as bad as the brain damage it foretold from the trailers, but it's a Happy Madison movie, so take that as you will.

Pluto Nash looked horrible from the beginning and even though it had a "huge celebrity", Eddie Murphy was already known for taking paycheck/crappy movies so there really wasn't any surprise there.

The complaint with "The Conqueror" is that it had a mismatched actor playing a historical role.  Was it really a terrible movie or could the person watching it just not get past the fact that it had John Wayne?

No Holds Barred wasn't oscar worthy but the "huge celebrity" was a well known wrestler making a wrestling movie?  This movie absolutely did not belong on this list, for god's sake go with "Over The Top" at least.
 
2013-07-12 02:09:28 PM

Representative of the unwashed masses: It becomes more and more obvious that Scientology is messed up when you take what should be a ready made box office success formula. Aliens-taking-over-the-world-post-apocalyptic-nightmare shoot em up concept and screw it up as badly as they did with Battlefield Earth...


A lot of it was just bad directing and terrible set design. I'm also sure it didn't help to have David Miscavige sending in notes that had to be acted on.
 
2013-07-12 02:09:28 PM

Primitive Screwhead: Stupid Guitar: What, no Magic Christian?

About the worst movie you'll ever watch starring Peter Sellers, Ringo Starr, Marlon Brando, Walter Mattheau,..ugh, the list is just too long.

On a whole, Magic Christian was bad but had some brilliantly farked up moments.

Like this one (NSFW)


For a second, I thought you were going to post the "Free Money scene". (possibly NSFW)
 
2013-07-12 02:09:36 PM

I_Am_Weasel: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x336]


That's not a real movie. They only made one Highlander film.
 
2013-07-12 02:10:37 PM

scottydoesntknow: Michael Caine for Jaws: The Revenge


"I have never seen it," he once said of Jaws: The Revenge (1987), in which he took a supporting role, "but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific."
 
2013-07-12 02:10:39 PM

under a mountain: [theseconddisc.files.wordpress.com image 450x270]

What's going on in this thread?


That is the complete opposite of a terrible movie.
 
2013-07-12 02:11:38 PM
Whole lot of trolls up in this thread...wow
 
2013-07-12 02:16:27 PM

Whatthefark: [i41.tinypic.com image 270x317]


I despise the first half of The 3 Amigos, and love the second half.

Luckily, the first time I saw it was when I caught it on TV and saw just the second half.
 
2013-07-12 02:18:46 PM

Spindle: This movie absolutely did not belong on this list, for god's sake go with "Over The Top" at least.


If you're going with "Over the Top," then I'm going with "Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot!"
 
2013-07-12 02:19:25 PM

Whatthefark: [i41.tinypic.com image 270x317]


You take that back right now!

/"In a way, all of us has an El Guapo to face. For some, shyness might be their El Guapo. For others, a lack of education might be their El Guapo. For us, El Guapo is a big, dangerous man who wants to kill us. But as sure as my name is Lucky Day, the people of Santa Poco can conquer their own personal El Guapo, who also happens to be *the actual* El Guapo!"
 
2013-07-12 02:20:22 PM

Whatthefark: [i41.tinypic.com image 270x317]


What do you mean? That movie was AWESOME!! Of course, when it came out, the High School did a combo dance/sponsored movie, and there was so much alcohol snuck in that the pile of swept up bottles at the end was about 3 feet tall. As a result, I remembered a talking turtle, and them sneaking into the movie lot.
 
2013-07-12 02:22:47 PM
Doom?
GI Joe: Retaliation?
The Tooth Fairy?

I guess what I'm saying is "The Rock needs to pick his films more carefully."
 
2013-07-12 02:23:16 PM
Hmmmm... no Armageddon.
 
2013-07-12 02:23:32 PM

bluorangefyre: EvilEgg: Travolta was a washed up has been until Tarrentino rescued him. He may be back on the B list again

He himself once joked upon hosting SNL one time that (at the time) they'd had 400 shows and he'd had 5,000 comebacks.

/I will say I rather enjoyed Bolt
//far superior than Battlefield Earth
///Hell, ANYTHING is better than Battlefield Earth


I don't understand the Travolta hate. I get a kick out of him, he seems to be able to turn the ham factor on at will, AND have fun with it, He plays a decently scary bad guy, and even though he's a Scientologist, it takes farkers and the media to remind me of it, as opposed to him getting on TV and loudly proclaiming it a la' Tom Cruise.
 
2013-07-12 02:26:07 PM
Dame Helen Mirren in Teaching Mrs Tingle.
 
2013-07-12 02:26:16 PM

Mikey1969: I don't understand the Travolta hate. I get a kick out of him, he seems to be able to turn the ham factor on at will, AND have fun with it, He plays a decently scary bad guy, and even though he's a Scientologist, it takes farkers and the media to remind me of it, as opposed to him getting on TV and loudly proclaiming it a la' Tom Cruise.


Face/Off and Punisher. (And I realize I'm one of 6 people who like that film.)

Travolta just needs to not be The Guy. Apparently, he's fine as a villain.
 
2013-07-12 02:27:53 PM
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-07-12 02:28:21 PM

Dr Dreidel: Doom?
GI Joe: Retaliation?
The Tooth Fairy?

I guess what I'm saying is "The Rock needs to pick his films more carefully."


Meh I don't ever fault The Rock for doing The Tooth Fairy. He did that so there would be a movie that he could watch with his daughter as she couldn't watch any of the other ones.

It's why I would never fault Raul Julia for Street Fighter as it was a way to spend time with his kids and make some money for his family before he died.
 
2013-07-12 02:28:34 PM
What about that crazy Sean connery movie, with the floating head and the red diaper outfit. Zardoz?
 
2013-07-12 02:28:37 PM

tricycleracer: scottydoesntknow: Michael Caine for Jaws: The Revenge

"I have never seen it," he once said of Jaws: The Revenge (1987), in which he took a supporting role, "but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific."


Bob Goldthwait once did a bit in his standup about his kids being embarresed of his films...

"I can't believe you did the talking horse movie"

"SHut up, that movie payed for the swimming pool!"

(from memory, so probably not word perfect, but you get the idea)
 
2013-07-12 02:30:58 PM

Mikey1969: the High School did a combo dance/sponsored movie, and t



Leslie: Rupert Marshetta, where have you been all year?

Rupert: The Bahamas, what does it look like?

Leslie: Well, you can't come in here unless you're dressed from Dallas or Dynasty.
 
2013-07-12 02:32:19 PM

squegeebooo: What about that crazy Sean connery movie, with the floating head and the red diaper outfit. Zardoz?


At the time, Sean's stock wasn't very high...
 
2013-07-12 02:32:33 PM

luidprand: TuteTibiImperes: Sybarite: Alicia Silverstone and Sigourney Weaver in "Vamps" (2012)

First, I don't think anyone has thought of Alicia Silverstone as a "huge celebrity" in well over a decade now. Second, I was wondering what ever happened to Amy Heckerling.

I think Krysten Ritter has more celebrity cache than Silverstone these days.  In fact, I think I want to see that movie now just because she's in it.

Amy Heckerling AND Krysten Ritter? How did I not hear of this earlier?


It played one (1) theater and made a little over $3K in the two weeks it was out. Went to video shortly thereafter.
 
2013-07-12 02:33:50 PM
www.nickcave.com
wish i could do this with my hair.
 
2013-07-12 02:34:02 PM

baka-san: squegeebooo: What about that crazy Sean connery movie, with the floating head and the red diaper outfit. Zardoz?

At the time, Sean's stock wasn't very high...


It was at the end of his bond run, how is that not high?
 
2013-07-12 02:37:12 PM
Spartan with Val Kilmer is turrible. Couldn't even finish it...
 
2013-07-12 02:38:31 PM

squegeebooo: baka-san: squegeebooo: What about that crazy Sean connery movie, with the floating head and the red diaper outfit. Zardoz?

At the time, Sean's stock wasn't very high...

It was at the end of his bond run, how is that not high?


Exactly, he was still typecast as Bond...


Hell, as far as I'm concerned, Never say Never Again was his true low point...
 
2013-07-12 02:38:51 PM

baka-san: squegeebooo: What about that crazy Sean connery movie, with the floating head and the red diaper outfit. Zardoz?

At the time, Sean's stock wasn't very high...


The seventies were generally a bad time for movies in general. Still, Zardoz didn't do him much harm. Within a couple of years he did Robin and Marian, A Bridge too Far, and The Man who would be King. Those were plum roles.
 
2013-07-12 02:42:22 PM
Which huge celebrity are they mentioning for No Holds Barred?  I do put Lister on my lists of if he is in a film I should watch it.
 
2013-07-12 02:42:41 PM
Ed Norton - Death To Smoochy
 
2013-07-12 02:42:41 PM

wiwille: And there's this gem:
[www.moviezit.com image 400x600]


Still amazing that a movie directed by Brian De Palma working with that source material could be so hilariously awful.
 
2013-07-12 02:47:11 PM

wjllope: Ed Norton - Death To Smoochy


I actually found that entertaining on how dark it was.  Mostly because Robin Williams played such a psychopath and Norton played such a goob.

It was Dark Comedy trying to be Dark Comedy.
 
2013-07-12 02:47:39 PM

DjangoStonereaver: Mangoose: No Holds Barred was a fantastic movie.

Well, it had at least 2 reasons to see it:

[www.wearysloth.com image 320x240]

GIS for "Joan Severance" and you'll see them more clearly (NSFW of course).


God. Now you have me thinking back to all those after dark/joe bob briggs drive-in movies. Ah, back to the days when entertainment wasn't so serious.
 
2013-07-12 02:47:46 PM
3rd Matrix movie.

/First one had so much promise.
 
2013-07-12 02:48:05 PM

under a mountain: [theseconddisc.files.wordpress.com image 450x270]

What's going on in this thread?


If you are saying Mad Mad World is a bad movie, you and me are going to have words.  That was a brilliant film.
 
2013-07-12 02:48:50 PM

wjllope: Ed Norton - Death To Smoochy


My favorite bit about that movie is Henry Rollins talking about when he auditioned to play the boxer.
 
2013-07-12 02:49:28 PM

ferretman: I thought Battlefield Earth was okay....


So you're the one...

wiwille: Gene Hackman:

[i2.listal.com image 600x803]


No, that whole farking movie is a true Delroy Lindo.  As in: "I've seen better film on teeth."

And DC wonders why Superman went way downhill in the 80s and hasn't really come up for air until MoS.
 
2013-07-12 02:50:03 PM

Summer Glau's Love Slave: 3rd Matrix movie.

/First one had so much promise.


The second one was three lbs of shiat in a 2lb bucket too.
 
2013-07-12 02:50:19 PM

Mikey1969: Holy Fark people, you want to know why movie 'A' or movie 'B' isn't on the list? Watch the footage from The Conqueror, it should take up all 7 positions itself. Seriously, John Wayne as Genghis Kahn, without bothering to lose the 'Aw, Shucks, ma'am' drawl? NO other movie with good actors can be this bad.


Combine that with the fact they filmed it in Nevada on top of radioactive fallout dirt (that they then trucked into the studio to make sure they had continuity) and that many people involved with the film then died of various cancers.
 
2013-07-12 02:53:09 PM

Whatthefark: [i41.tinypic.com image 270x317]


Whaaaaaaaaaaa!??!  That's an awesome movie.
 
2013-07-12 02:55:04 PM

baka-san: tricycleracer: scottydoesntknow: Michael Caine for Jaws: The Revenge

"I have never seen it," he once said of Jaws: The Revenge (1987), in which he took a supporting role, "but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific."

Bob Goldthwait once did a bit in his standup about his kids being embarresed of his films...

"I can't believe you did the talking horse movie"

"SHut up, that movie payed for the swimming pool!"

(from memory, so probably not word perfect, but you get the idea)


Eddie Murphy was talking about getting signed up for one of his films, it may have actually been Pluto Nash, where he refused the script because it was so bad.  He said that the producers wrote a number down and he said "what is this, a phone number?" and they replied "that's what we'll pay you"
 
2013-07-12 02:55:52 PM

squegeebooo: It was at the end of his bond run, how is that not high?


baka-san mentioned this, but Connery was tired of being Bond and wanted to break out into more serious acting. "Zardoz" was supposed to be a high-concept prestige film, something bigger and bolder than "2001: a Space Odyssey". I think we know what happened to that idea.
 
2013-07-12 02:59:07 PM

Summer Glau's Love Slave: 3rd Matrix movie.

/First one had so much promise.


First one was such a mindfark that I was sure there had to be an awesome novel out there that it was based on. Second one barely kept me interested. Never been able to make it through the third...
 
2013-07-12 03:01:44 PM

wraithmare: Mikey1969: Holy Fark people, you want to know why movie 'A' or movie 'B' isn't on the list? Watch the footage from The Conqueror, it should take up all 7 positions itself. Seriously, John Wayne as Genghis Kahn, without bothering to lose the 'Aw, Shucks, ma'am' drawl? NO other movie with good actors can be this bad.

Combine that with the fact they filmed it in Nevada on top of radioactive fallout dirt (that they then trucked into the studio to make sure they had continuity) and that many people involved with the film then died of various cancers.


That's some truly farked up shiat... Fun fact: Apparently due to general prevailing winds, Utah has received a lot of that soil over the years. I get the idea that there's more radioactive soil in Utah than Nevada at this point.
 
2013-07-12 03:02:46 PM

mikieb: I_Am_Weasel: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x336]

That's not a real movie. They only made one Highlander film.


And now they want to fark it up and reboot it with Ryan Goddamned Reynolds....

Amazing that they could make the TV series so good, yet fark up the sequels so badly...
 
2013-07-12 03:03:22 PM
Michael Caine on Jaws IV: "I have never seen it [the film], but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific!" He says that the film "will go down in my memory as the time when I won an Oscar, paid for a house and had a great holiday. Not bad for a flop movie."
 
2013-07-12 03:05:22 PM

I_Am_Weasel: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x336]


Nice photoshop there. Everyone knows they only made one movie.


/I drink to forget the rest
 
2013-07-12 03:06:45 PM

wiwille: Flappyhead: Caligula.

After two attempts I've never finished that movie. I shall not try again, and this coming from someone who sat through Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters and Zardoz.


Well all the boobies kept me into Caligula, other than that not so good.
 
2013-07-12 03:08:32 PM

Dr Dreidel: Mikey1969: I don't understand the Travolta hate. I get a kick out of him, he seems to be able to turn the ham factor on at will, AND have fun with it, He plays a decently scary bad guy, and even though he's a Scientologist, it takes farkers and the media to remind me of it, as opposed to him getting on TV and loudly proclaiming it a la' Tom Cruise.

Face/Off and Punisher. (And I realize I'm one of 6 people who like that film.)

Travolta just needs to not be The Guy. Apparently, he's fine as a villain.


Neither Punisher was THAT good, but neither was worth committing seppuku over, like some people seem to want to. Thomas Jane was definitely the better of the two, though. And yeah, I really liked Travolta in Face/Off.
 
2013-07-12 03:09:29 PM

hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]


bite your tongue!  Mars Attacks was awesome... ok, maybe not awesome, but certainly doesn't belong on a list with Battlefield Earth.
 
2013-07-12 03:13:08 PM

Mikey1969: Summer Glau's Love Slave: 3rd Matrix movie.

/First one had so much promise.

First one was such a mindfark that I was sure there had to be an awesome novel out there that it was based on. Second one barely kept me interested. Never been able to make it through the third...


You know, everytime people keep desiring a "The Incredibles" sequel, I need to start mentioning how it could easily become another "Matrix".  First movie: Outstanding...and then it goes downhill from there with the sequels.
 
2013-07-12 03:16:37 PM

Guns n' Farkin Roses: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

bite your tongue!  Mars Attacks was awesome... ok, maybe not awesome, but certainly doesn't belong on a list with Battlefield Earth.


MARS ATTACKS could have been a classic, except that it is over-saturated with the foul stench of Tim
Burton's "I can fetishize crap retro media because I'm a BRILLIANT AUTEUR!" poseurness.
 
2013-07-12 03:17:40 PM
I LIKE the movie Battlefield Earth.  I have the book, it was in my late Mom's library.  I'll get around to reading it someday, to see how far the movie strayed from the book.
 
2013-07-12 03:19:23 PM

Mikey1969: . Thomas Jane was definitely the better of the two, though



WHat about this one?

mariolikesmovies.com
 
2013-07-12 03:20:22 PM

Mikey1969: Holy Fark people, you want to know why movie 'A' or movie 'B' isn't on the list? Watch the footage from The Conqueror, it should take up all 7 positions itself. Seriously, John Wayne as Genghis Kahn, without bothering to lose the 'Aw, Shucks, ma'am' drawl? NO other movie with good actors can be this bad.


... PLUS, it has the distinction of leading to multiple cancer deaths, including Wayne's .. so there's THAT.
 
2013-07-12 03:22:37 PM
gallerytheimage.com
 
2013-07-12 03:28:13 PM

Rwa2play: Mikey1969: Summer Glau's Love Slave: 3rd Matrix movie.

/First one had so much promise.

First one was such a mindfark that I was sure there had to be an awesome novel out there that it was based on. Second one barely kept me interested. Never been able to make it through the third...

You know, everytime people keep desiring a "The Incredibles" sequel, I need to start mentioning how it could easily become another "Matrix".  First movie: Outstanding...and then it goes downhill from there with the sequels.


Or Shrek. The first one of those was still kind of new and funny - remember, it came out 15 years ago, before "twisted fairy tales" became the Mouse's only trick.
 
2013-07-12 03:28:50 PM

baka-san: Mikey1969: . Thomas Jane was definitely the better of the two, though


WHat about this one?

[mariolikesmovies.com image 520x715]


That's what I meant when I said 'Better of the Two'. Did they try that movie a third time that I didn't know about? Wow... The Lundgren one was OK in the days before constant remakes and reboots because I thought that was the best we were going to get.
 
2013-07-12 03:30:20 PM
Sorry everyone.

To each their own, but I thought Three Amigos sucked donkey balls.
 
2013-07-12 03:32:27 PM

Mikey1969: baka-san: Mikey1969: . Thomas Jane was definitely the better of the two, though


WHat about this one?

[mariolikesmovies.com image 520x715]

That's what I meant when I said 'Better of the Two'. Did they try that movie a third time that I didn't know about? Wow... The Lundgren one was OK in the days before constant remakes and reboots because I thought that was the best we were going to get.


You didn't know about this rancid, festering, cesspool of a movie?

ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2013-07-12 03:33:10 PM

Mikey1969: baka-san: Mikey1969: . Thomas Jane was definitely the better of the two, though


WHat about this one?

[mariolikesmovies.com image 520x715]

That's what I meant when I said 'Better of the Two'. Did they try that movie a third time that I didn't know about? Wow... The Lundgren one was OK in the days before constant remakes and reboots because I thought that was the best we were going to get.


ecx.images-amazon.com

/It was soooo bad
 
2013-07-12 03:33:33 PM

Mikey1969: That's what I meant when I said 'Better of the Two'. Did they try that movie a third time that I didn't know about? Wow..


Yep!
 
2013-07-12 03:33:40 PM

trekkiecougar: I LIKE the movie Battlefield Earth.  I have the book, it was in my late Mom's library.  I'll get around to reading it someday, to see how far the movie strayed from the book.


I haven't read 'Battlefield Earth', but I've read a bunch of his 'Mission Earth' series. If B.E. is anything like those, let me give you two warnings:

1:

He

likes

to

have

a

lot

of

page

breaks

Seriously, it's like a book version of DailyMail format.... One, maybe two sentences, a double space, another sentence, a double space. Lather, rinse repeat.

2: HE LIKES TO TYPE ENTIRE SENTENCES IN ALL CAPS!!!!! Anything tense is written in all caps, sometimes every fourth sentence.

The Mission Earth books I read were kind of fun in a cheesy Sci-Fi kind of way, but getting a paragraph per page, and all of the Caps finally turned me off...
 
2013-07-12 03:35:27 PM

SirTanon: Mikey1969: baka-san: Mikey1969: . Thomas Jane was definitely the better of the two, though


WHat about this one?

[mariolikesmovies.com image 520x715]

That's what I meant when I said 'Better of the Two'. Did they try that movie a third time that I didn't know about? Wow... The Lundgren one was OK in the days before constant remakes and reboots because I thought that was the best we were going to get.

You didn't know about this rancid, festering, cesspool of a movie?

[ecx.images-amazon.com image 350x500]


No, Jesus, how can they fark this movie up so much? It's one of the easier ones to make. Revenge is pretty easy.
 
2013-07-12 03:36:43 PM

baka-san: Mikey1969: That's what I meant when I said 'Better of the Two'. Did they try that movie a third time that I didn't know about? Wow..

Yep!


Truly astounding that they have tried and failed 3 times on this premise...
 
2013-07-12 03:38:09 PM

Mikey1969: The Mission Earth books I read were kind of fun in a cheesy Sci-Fi kind of way, but getting a paragraph per page, and all of the Caps finally turned me off...


It's the only way they could have turned that pile of festering crap into a "decology". Should have been a single $1.75 mass-market paperback.
 
2013-07-12 03:39:02 PM

under a mountain: [theseconddisc.files.wordpress.com image 450x270]

What's going on in this thread?


You're dead to me.
 
2013-07-12 03:42:58 PM

Mangoose: No Holds Barred was a fantastic movie.


Youre thinking "No Holes Barred".

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0381452/

Gauge, Taylor Rain and one of my all time favs Sophie Evans.  Hells yes.
 
2013-07-12 03:50:58 PM

squegeebooo: What about that crazy Sean connery movie, with the floating head and the red diaper outfit. Zardoz?


Zardoz is a conundrum. Long parts of it are boring as hell, but then it's puntcuated by moments of terribad beauty. The "penis is evil" monologue from the giant stone Marx head, for one. Or the "Sean Connery learns everything in the world" montage. Also, there's lots of boobs throughout. Although many of them belong to suspiciously youthful-looking actresses (the director apparently had his niece topless somewhere in the movie).

Or, to put it another way:

i182.photobucket.com

"Here's an off-beat cult movie with Sean Connery in it."

"That's good!"

"He wears go-go boots and a red diaper throughout most of it."

"That's bad."

"But it's got talking stone idols that spew guns!"

"That's good!"

"The movie ends with Sean Connery staring at the camera while wearing a green elf costume, until he eventually gets old and turns into a skeleton."

"..."

"That's bad."

"Can I go now?"
 
2013-07-12 03:56:53 PM

Rwa2play: wiwille: Gene Hackman:

[i2.listal.com image 600x803]

No, that whole farking movie is a true Delroy Lindo.  As in: "I've seen better film on teeth."


Hey now, what do you have against Delroy Lindo?  I've only seen him in a few films, all supporting roles, but I thought he turned in decent performances each time.  The crime movie with Gene Hackman was pretty damn good.  (And featured nonstop one-liners out of a script by David Mamet, no less.)

/are you kidding, she could talk her way out of a sunburn!
 
2013-07-12 03:58:14 PM
ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2013-07-12 04:10:30 PM
Plan 9 not mentionable?
 
2013-07-12 04:15:19 PM

SirTanon: Mikey1969: baka-san: Mikey1969: . Thomas Jane was definitely the better of the two, though


WHat about this one?

[mariolikesmovies.com image 520x715]

That's what I meant when I said 'Better of the Two'. Did they try that movie a third time that I didn't know about? Wow... The Lundgren one was OK in the days before constant remakes and reboots because I thought that was the best we were going to get.

You didn't know about this rancid, festering, cesspool of a movie?

[ecx.images-amazon.com image 350x500]


It's bad, but there are bright spots - McNulty as Jigsaw, but with the worst fake accent of all time (of all time!); LBJ has one or two good scenes; the wineglass throat-slash; and the gratuitous deaths that make silly action movies fun.

// there are bad parts, too
// I recommend giving it a try, especially if you're the type - like me - who always irrationally likes "superhero" movies (Daredevil, GL, the X-Mens...pretty much all of them except Superman Returns, Spiderman 3, Batman Forever and B&R)
// Jane/Travolta is still way better
 
2013-07-12 04:16:43 PM

Summer Glau's Love Slave: 3rd Matrix movie.

/First one had so much promise.


THIS. It's been a while since I was disappointed as hard as I was by the conclusion to the Matrix trilogy.
 
2013-07-12 04:36:29 PM
scottydoesntknow:

It's why I would never fault Raul Julia for Street Fighter as it was a way to spend time with his kids and make some money for his family before he died.

IIRC he knew his time was short and asked his kids what movie they'd like him to do out of a bunch of various offers.  They picked SF and dear Lord was he ever awesome in it.
 
2013-07-12 04:40:17 PM

ferretman: [ecx.images-amazon.com image 509x721]


Not for nothing, but I thought it was a decent movie and doesn't belong in the list.
 
2013-07-12 04:52:01 PM

ferretman: [ecx.images-amazon.com image 509x721]


Yeah, that was bad. Bad with a capital 'Q'. In other words, so bad that bad didn't describe it enough, and they had to add extra silent letters to give the word more 'oomph'.
 
2013-07-12 04:56:11 PM

luidprand: TuteTibiImperes: Sybarite: Alicia Silverstone and Sigourney Weaver in "Vamps" (2012)

First, I don't think anyone has thought of Alicia Silverstone as a "huge celebrity" in well over a decade now. Second, I was wondering what ever happened to Amy Heckerling.

I think Krysten Ritter has more celebrity cache than Silverstone these days.  In fact, I think I want to see that movie now just because she's in it.

Amy Heckerling AND Krysten Ritter? How did I not hear of this earlier?


Same here. Also: Malcolm McDowell AND Wallace Shawn? OFF TO NETFLIX!
 
2013-07-12 04:58:20 PM

squegeebooo: What about that crazy Sean connery movie, with the floating head and the red diaper outfit. Zardoz?


Oh no you didn't just insult the greatness of Zardos!

Any movie that starting dialogue is "The Penis is evil! The Penis shoots Seeds, and makes new Life to poison the Earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the Gun shoots Death and purifies the Earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth, and kill! Zardoz has spoken." is destined to be loved forever.
 
2013-07-12 05:13:35 PM

Dr Dreidel: SirTanon: Mikey1969: baka-san: Mikey1969: . Thomas Jane was definitely the better of the two, though


WHat about this one?

[mariolikesmovies.com image 520x715]

That's what I meant when I said 'Better of the Two'. Did they try that movie a third time that I didn't know about? Wow... The Lundgren one was OK in the days before constant remakes and reboots because I thought that was the best we were going to get.

You didn't know about this rancid, festering, cesspool of a movie?

[ecx.images-amazon.com image 350x500]

It's bad, but there are bright spots - McNulty as Jigsaw, but with the worst fake accent of all time (of all time!); LBJ has one or two good scenes; the wineglass throat-slash; and the gratuitous deaths that make silly action movies fun.

// there are bad parts, too
// I recommend giving it a try, especially if you're the type - like me - who always irrationally likes "superhero" movies (Daredevil, GL, the X-Mens...pretty much all of them except Superman Returns, Spiderman 3, Batman Forever and B&R)
// Jane/Travolta is still way better


stream1.gifsoup.com

That scene in War Zone just never gets old...
 
2013-07-12 05:22:45 PM

jbc: List fails without Denis Leary in "The Sandlot".


Even when trolling, there are just some lines you shouldn't cross.
 
2013-07-12 05:48:16 PM

wjllope: Ed Norton - Death To Smoochy


death to smoochy is hilarious.
 
2013-07-12 06:06:39 PM
Brian Blessed & Max Von Sydow in Flash Gordon.

/Yes they were both EXCELLENT in their respective roles.
//Queen was a perfect choice for doing the soundtrack.
///But Sam J. Jones should be deeply ashamed for his piss poor performance.
 
2013-07-12 06:15:03 PM
Battlefield Earth was so bad, they re-edited it for home video. As bad as the DVD is, there is somewhere a version that is far, far worse. However, unlike the Star Wars Holiday Special, I have yet to see a copy online anywhere.
 
2013-07-12 06:18:14 PM

DjangoStonereaver: Guns n' Farkin Roses: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

bite your tongue!  Mars Attacks was awesome... ok, maybe not awesome, but certainly doesn't belong on a list with Battlefield Earth.

MARS ATTACKS could have been a classic, except that it is over-saturated with the foul stench of Tim
Burton's "I can fetishize crap retro media because I'm a BRILLIANT AUTEUR!" poseurness.


Bullshiat!  It was awesome!
 
2013-07-12 06:22:34 PM

TuteTibiImperes: jbc: List fails without Denis Leary in "The Sandlot".

It's about good actors in bad movies, not bad actors in good movies.


+farking 1
 
2013-07-12 06:39:00 PM

Dr Dreidel: // Jane/Travolta is still way better


Agreed. I don't get the hate for the Jane version.
 
2013-07-12 06:40:22 PM

Fuggin Bizzy: Summer Glau's Love Slave: 3rd Matrix movie.

/First one had so much promise.

THIS. It's been a while since I was disappointed as hard as I was by the conclusion to the Matrix trilogy.


I actually liked the end of the third Matrix movie.

Because it was the end.

How can you tell when a movie is truly bad? When it doesn't even make it onto bad movie lists.
i2.cdnds.net

So much promise, so much potential...
 
2013-07-12 07:04:07 PM
The third Matrix had the ending set up in the first one. You can't really have a Christ figure without the whole crucifixion thing. It'd be like having a tv show where everyone starts out dead in a mysterious land and NOT have it be Purgatory. Or a retelling of the Mormon migration where angels aren't guiding them along.

Seriously, people.
 
2013-07-12 07:40:19 PM

Mikey1969: Holy Fark people, you want to know why movie 'A' or movie 'B' isn't on the list? Watch the footage from The Conqueror, it should take up all 7 positions itself. Seriously, John Wayne as Genghis Kahn, without bothering to lose the 'Aw, Shucks, ma'am' drawl? NO other movie with good actors can be this bad.


Not to mention the film was so bad, it caused a large portion of the cast to develop cancer.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Conqueror_(film)
 
2013-07-12 07:47:28 PM

Sybarite: Alicia Silverstone and Sigourney Weaver in "Vamps" (2012)

First, I don't think anyone has thought of Alicia Silverstone as a "huge celebrity" in well over a decade now. Second, I was wondering what ever happened to Amy Heckerling.


Third, the movie got 50% at RottenTomatoes. That's not terrible. Batman and Robin got 12%. That is terrible.
 
2013-07-12 08:37:20 PM

fusillade762: Dr Dreidel: // Jane/Travolta is still way better

Agreed. I don't get the hate for the Jane version.


It was wasted potential. Jane is by far the best Punisher that's graced the screen, but Travolta just sucked. Tacking on the entire family massacre at the reunion to try and make it "extra evil" just made it corny to me.

If you've never seen Thomas Jane's love letter to The Punisher franchise, check it out: Dirty Laundry

/I'm sure you've seen it fusillade, it's more for others
 
2013-07-12 08:52:01 PM
Anything with Will Smif.
 
2013-07-12 10:32:55 PM
To me, there is a difference between a big budget movie that just doesn't jell, vs low budget schlock that hires a big name star so it makes its money back. Specifically, "Pluto Nash" was an Eddie Murphy tentpole vehicle from day one. Even with him, it grossed $7m on a $100m budget in 2002. So having Eddie didn't help. The movie "Best Defense" on the other hand was a complete POS, but by adding Eddie Murphy in an add in part at the last minute, it made 19M in 1984 (production cost N/A). So I'd say its more of a terrible movie with a star than "Pluto Nash" is.

It should really be about movies that conned the audience with a star who knew they were slumming for the paycheck, otherwise, this list should be filled with movies like "Ishtar" or "Jonah Hex"  that spent big $$ and still really tanked critically and box office wise.

/numbers from box office mojo
 
2013-07-12 10:42:41 PM

InmanRoshi: Eddie Murphy's entire imdb page since the Beverly Hills Cop 2.


That's the whole problem with this list. It's supposed to be good actors in bad movies. Hulk Hogan? Eddie Murphy? Adam Sandler? I don't think any of them qualify as "good"
 
2013-07-12 10:50:33 PM

hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]


But Mars Attacks! supposed to be campy.

/ and I love it
 
2013-07-12 10:53:24 PM

Surly U. Jest: luidprand: TuteTibiImperes: Sybarite: Alicia Silverstone and Sigourney Weaver in "Vamps" (2012)

First, I don't think anyone has thought of Alicia Silverstone as a "huge celebrity" in well over a decade now. Second, I was wondering what ever happened to Amy Heckerling.

I think Krysten Ritter has more celebrity cache than Silverstone these days.  In fact, I think I want to see that movie now just because she's in it.

Amy Heckerling AND Krysten Ritter? How did I not hear of this earlier?

It played one (1) theater and made a little over $3K in the two weeks it was out. Went to video shortly thereafter.


I believe this is actually a pretty common practice. Something to do with contracts of appearing in a theatre before going to video. I don't think they are really considered theatrical releases but I'm not sure.
 
2013-07-12 11:55:02 PM
Kill two birds with one post.

nymoviereviews.com
 
2013-07-13 12:16:30 AM

LonMead: Fuggin Bizzy: Summer Glau's Love Slave: 3rd Matrix movie.

/First one had so much promise.

THIS. It's been a while since I was disappointed as hard as I was by the conclusion to the Matrix trilogy.

I actually liked the end of the third Matrix movie.

Because it was the end.

How can you tell when a movie is truly bad? When it doesn't even make it onto bad movie lists.
[i2.cdnds.net image 618x438]

So much promise, so much potential...


And Marvel can ALWAYS poke Warner Bros. for that turd in SO MANY WAYS~!

/That's your "Avengers"...HAH~!
 
2013-07-13 12:49:29 AM
"Be cool".

Take funny and cool original movie ("Get shorty"), suck all the life, fun and cool out of it, fill it with a lot of known actors, and produce a massive pile of suck called "sequel". God, what a waste of time that movie was.
 
2013-07-13 01:48:34 AM

sotua: "Be cool".

Take funny and cool original movie ("Get shorty"), suck all the life, fun and cool out of it, fill it with a lot of known actors, and produce a massive pile of suck called "sequel". God, what a waste of time that movie was.


But, as been pointed out elsewhere, The Rock was hilarious.

Hearing him sing "You Ain't Woman Enough to Take My Man" was the funniest thing I had heard in years.
 
2013-07-13 02:09:38 AM

I_Am_Weasel: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x336]




Nice fake poster.
 
2013-07-13 03:07:27 AM
I kinda liked Pluto Nash, it wasn't the best movie ever made but it's definitely worth a watch on a bored afternoon.
 
2013-07-13 04:13:59 AM

DjangoStonereaver: Guns n' Farkin Roses: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

bite your tongue!  Mars Attacks was awesome... ok, maybe not awesome, but certainly doesn't belong on a list with Battlefield Earth.

MARS ATTACKS could have been a classic, except that it is over-saturated with the foul stench of Tim
Burton's "I can fetishize crap retro media because I'm a BRILLIANT AUTEUR!" poseurness.


No.  Mars Attacks was a middling 10 minute SNL sketch expanded into a full-length movie with an all-star cast.  Even if it wasn't the case, it looked like Burton directed that movie like he was feeling really pissed off about something.
 
2013-07-13 08:02:41 AM

ferretman:


My first thought as well
 
2013-07-13 09:18:04 AM

NDP2: DjangoStonereaver: Guns n' Farkin Roses: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

bite your tongue!  Mars Attacks was awesome... ok, maybe not awesome, but certainly doesn't belong on a list with Battlefield Earth.

MARS ATTACKS could have been a classic, except that it is over-saturated with the foul stench of Tim
Burton's "I can fetishize crap retro media because I'm a BRILLIANT AUTEUR!" poseurness.

No.  Mars Attacks was a middling 10 minute SNL sketch expanded into a full-length movie with an all-star cast.  Even if it wasn't the case, it looked like Burton directed that movie like he was feeling really pissed off about something.




SNL was around in 1962?
 
2013-07-13 10:24:49 AM

thisisyourbrainonFark: Kill two birds with one post.

[nymoviereviews.com image 700x470]



Horrible movie.
 
2013-07-13 11:18:56 AM

cfreak: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

But Mars Attacks! supposed to be campy.

/ and I love it


You can't set out to make camp, and Burton knows it.

He was trying to make an 'affectionate spoof', but forgot about the 'affectionate' part.
 
2013-07-13 11:58:10 AM

DjangoStonereaver: cfreak: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

But Mars Attacks! supposed to be campy.

/ and I love it

You can't set out to make camp, and Burton knows it.

He was trying to make an 'affectionate spoof', but forgot about the 'affectionate' part.




Army of Darkness.
 
2013-07-13 02:04:50 PM

StoPPeRmobile: DjangoStonereaver: cfreak: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

But Mars Attacks! supposed to be campy.

/ and I love it

You can't set out to make camp, and Burton knows it.

He was trying to make an 'affectionate spoof', but forgot about the 'affectionate' part.

Army of Darkness.


Was a mix of comedy & horror, not camp.
 
2013-07-13 02:21:16 PM

DjangoStonereaver: StoPPeRmobile: DjangoStonereaver: cfreak: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

But Mars Attacks! supposed to be campy.

/ and I love it

You can't set out to make camp, and Burton knows it.

He was trying to make an 'affectionate spoof', but forgot about the 'affectionate' part.

Army of Darkness.

Was a mix of comedy & horror, not camp.




I'm going with, you don't know what you are talking about.
 
2013-07-13 03:15:12 PM

StoPPeRmobile: NDP2: DjangoStonereaver: Guns n' Farkin Roses: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

bite your tongue!  Mars Attacks was awesome... ok, maybe not awesome, but certainly doesn't belong on a list with Battlefield Earth.

MARS ATTACKS could have been a classic, except that it is over-saturated with the foul stench of Tim
Burton's "I can fetishize crap retro media because I'm a BRILLIANT AUTEUR!" poseurness.

No.  Mars Attacks was a middling 10 minute SNL sketch expanded into a full-length movie with an all-star cast.  Even if it wasn't the case, it looked like Burton directed that movie like he was feeling really pissed off about something.

SNL was around in 1962?


I meant Mars Attacks was like a middling SNL sketch blown up to feature film length--something that would have been mildly amusing at 5 to 10 minutes but interminable at 100.
 
2013-07-13 06:52:04 PM

StoPPeRmobile: DjangoStonereaver: StoPPeRmobile: DjangoStonereaver: cfreak: hugram: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x442]

But Mars Attacks! supposed to be campy.

/ and I love it

You can't set out to make camp, and Burton knows it.

He was trying to make an 'affectionate spoof', but forgot about the 'affectionate' part.

Army of Darkness.

Was a mix of comedy & horror, not camp.

I'm going with, you don't know what you are talking about.


i.imgflip.com
 
2013-07-13 07:00:30 PM

Saiga410: If you are saying Mad Mad World is a bad movie, you and me are going to have words.  That was a brilliant film.


This. I'm not a huge fan of slapstick by any means, but the sequence where the gas/service station gets completely destroyed makes me laugh to this day.

/of course, virtually anything with Jonathan Winters in it gets a pass with me.
 
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