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(Buzzfeed)   Former high school teacher, now a Congressman, trolls the GOP with a red pen   (buzzfeed.com ) divider line
    More: Amusing, Louisiana Republican Rep, congressman, GOP, humans, Mark Takano, John Culberson, Charles Boustany, Bill Cassidy  
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6517 clicks; posted to Politics » on 12 Jul 2013 at 9:53 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-07-12 10:31:48 AM  
8 votes:
Democrat:  You guys should really vote for this bill.
Republican:  STOP BULLYING ME!
Democrat:  You're facing a demographic nightmare.  I'm just saying...
Republican:  THIS IS EVERYTHING AMERICA HATES ABOUT WASHINGTON!
Democrat:  According to the polls, you're everything America hates about Washington.
Republican:  STOP OPPRESSING ME!
2013-07-12 10:17:48 AM  
7 votes:
Great, now math and english have a liberal bias
2013-07-12 10:33:49 AM  
6 votes:

monoski: Great, now math and english English have a liberal bias

[Needs period]

See me after Fark.
2013-07-12 10:17:36 AM  
5 votes:
Silly congressman, republicans are homeschooled.
2013-07-12 11:11:58 AM  
3 votes:

theknuckler_33: "Representative Takano's action and grandstanding represent everything Americans hate about Washington, but I won't let his partisanship stand for all of us," Cassidy said.

[winace.courageunfettered.com image 229x123]


More accurate in this case:

i39.tinypic.com
2013-07-12 10:11:55 AM  
3 votes:
Typical modern conservatives - way too concerned with where the penis going to be used next.
2013-07-12 09:58:36 AM  
3 votes:
As if the GOP listened to educators. This is just more reason why we should cut those elitist rich teachers.
2013-07-12 09:42:58 AM  
3 votes:
"Representative Takano's action and grandstanding represent everything Americans hate about Washington, but I won't let his partisanship stand for all of us," Cassidy said. "My colleagues and I are absolutely going to keep requesting that the Speaker listen to the American people, not the big money interests and rank partisans trying to bully and intimidate members of Congress to quickly pass this massive amnesty bill."

Do you think the Republicans use the same people that service Obama's teleprompter to maintain their projector?  Cause that thing is on like 100% of the time.
2013-07-12 12:03:50 PM  
2 votes:

Diogenes: The "it's too long" argument is getting to be one of my favorites.  It should invite the ridicule of every voting American.  But it's become a valid excuse because we've become a nation of lazy dumbasses.

I would LOVE to be able to use that excuse on my job.  "Please fact check this manual against the product."  "Sorry, too long."


"Well, I'm sorry, Diogenes, but our company requires that you confirm this manual has been written correctly."

"THIS JOB IS EVERYTHING AMERICANS HATE ABOUT WASHINGTON!"
2013-07-12 11:50:17 AM  
2 votes:

Dr Dreidel: chimp_ninja: I'm sorry you think 286 pages is too hard to read. I recommend that you never run for the Senate.

[24.media.tumblr.com image 500x323]

// from Takano's Tumblr
// which is alternately informative and hysterical


How have I not heard about this guy?  He's awesome!

...and also must be the love-child of Jon Stewart and George Takei.
2013-07-12 11:13:48 AM  
2 votes:

chimp_ninja: I'm sorry you think 286 pages is too hard to read. I recommend that you never run for the Senate.


24.media.tumblr.com

// from Takano's Tumblr
// which is alternately informative and hysterical
2013-07-12 10:53:25 AM  
2 votes:
Republicans are complaining that the immigration bill passed by the Senate is too comprehensive? The only cure for that is to tack on some abortion restricting riders.
2013-07-12 10:36:07 AM  
2 votes:
"Representative Takano's action and grandstanding represent everything Americans hate about Washington, but I won't let his partisanship stand for all of us," Cassidy said.

winace.courageunfettered.com
2013-07-12 10:18:35 AM  
2 votes:
I think one of the great failings here is assuming Republican politicians have the mental capabilities of high school students and should be graded at that level.

That is clearly C+ material from elementary student-level minds, if only because of the semi-appropriate use of several middle-school level vocabulary words.
2013-07-12 10:13:48 AM  
2 votes:
24.media.tumblr.com

I can see at least one thing he missed - they were either mixing Arabic and Roman numerals, or they think that 'XX' is actually a date in July.
2013-07-12 09:58:51 AM  
2 votes:
The "it's too long" argument is getting to be one of my favorites.  It should invite the ridicule of every voting American.  But it's become a valid excuse because we've become a nation of lazy dumbasses.

I would LOVE to be able to use that excuse on my job.  "Please fact check this manual against the product."  "Sorry, too long."
2013-07-12 07:49:16 AM  
2 votes:
So it was all political posturing instead of an effort to solve a problem of substance? Do the rest of the GOP guys know about this?

Somebody_got_told.jpg
2013-07-12 04:10:41 PM  
1 vote:

randomjsa: I always suspected teachers didn't know what the hell they were talking about when they marked up a paper with a red pen.

Now I know for sure.


One of these days you will return to a thread and either explain or defend your statements. I have not once seen you do that in all the time I've recognized your username.

To give you some idea of how everyone feels about you, imagine me walking into your home and dropping a steaming deuce on the middle of your rug. Then I leave without saying why I did it, nor responding to phone calls asking me for an explanation. That's you, randomj - a threadsh*tter. You're not even good enough to be called a troll. A good troll actually riles emotions in people. Getting replies isn't the only criteria for trolling; you have to be taken seriously by the person responding to you.

You? You're just an idiot.
2013-07-12 02:51:57 PM  
1 vote:
Still shorter than Atlas Shrugged and the Bible.

True, but the cons only read the Bible on Sunday, and then it's only the parts with the smitin' in it. That way it's not too taxing ....
2013-07-12 01:05:56 PM  
1 vote:

nmrsnr: Lord_Baull: Some advice random: Get a new schpeel. You're current one is unispired, dry and weak.

In the spirit of corrections, the word you wanted to write is "spiel" which is German/Yiddish for "speak" and usually connotes a sales pitch. The word you were looking for is "shtick" which is Yiddish for an act or piece of a show.



I was speaking phonetically with spelling errors for his benefit.
(I know, I should have spelled it "week.")
2013-07-12 12:32:41 PM  
1 vote:
randomjsa

(favorite: Complete and Total Ignorance)


Now I know for sure.
2013-07-12 12:30:08 PM  
1 vote:

tricycleracer: All legislation must fit into a single tweet.


"9-9-9."

What am I supposed to do with the other 134 characters?
2013-07-12 12:30:07 PM  
1 vote:

randomjsa: I always suspected teachers didn't know what the hell they were talking about when they marked up a paper with a red pen.

Now I know for sure.


Boy, you sure got him.
2013-07-12 12:28:35 PM  
1 vote:

randomjsa: I always suspected teachers didn't know what the hell they were talking about when they marked up a paper with a red pen.

Evidence?!
Now I know for sure.
2013-07-12 11:48:19 AM  
1 vote:

Rapmaster2000: Immigration reform should be like 8 pages long only.  Don't ask me how I know this.


One page.  The answer you were looking for was one.

encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com
2013-07-12 11:41:17 AM  
1 vote:

Dr Dreidel: chimp_ninja: I'm sorry you think 286 pages is too hard to read. I recommend that you never run for the Senate.

[24.media.tumblr.com image 500x323]

// from Takano's Tumblr
// which is alternately informative and hysterical


They need to add the length of the Galt Speech to that chart
2013-07-12 11:25:24 AM  
1 vote:

Snarfangel: Hmm, I should have used "were" instead of "was" because it is conditional. I am going to lose points there.


Oh, subjunctive snap!
2013-07-12 11:13:20 AM  
1 vote:

xanadian: But on the flipside, a *thousand* f*cking pages for immigration reform??  When did we elect Leo Tolstoy to the Senate?  (And at 500 pages and counting, the House isn't doing much better).


Have you ever read a bill? You have to show how the current law will be changed, including not only the new language but also the language being replaced or removed, indicated by strikeout. So you get page after page of proposed legislation which looks something like this:

"Title 8, section 1721, of the United States Code shall be amended to read: 'Any person who obtains information under this subsection without authorization or exceeding authorized access (as defined in section 1030 (e) of title 18), and who uses such information in the manner described in any of the paragraphs (1) through (7) of section 1030(a) of such title, or attempts to use such information in such manner, shall be subject to the same penalties as are applicable under section 1030(c) of such title for violation of that paragraph. You're ugly and your mother dresses you funny.'"
2013-07-12 11:02:32 AM  
1 vote:
Bill to drop all education funding coming next from Republicans?
2013-07-12 10:47:00 AM  
1 vote:

Diogenes: "Representative Takano's action and grandstanding represent everything Americans hate about Washington, but I won't let his partisanship stand for all of us," Cassidy said. "My colleagues and I are absolutely going to keep requesting that the Speaker listen to the American people, not the big money interests and rank partisans trying to bully and intimidate members of Congress to quickly pass this massive amnesty bill."

Do you think the Republicans use the same people that service Obama's teleprompter to maintain their projector?  Cause that thing is on like 100% of the time.


My response to Cassidy:

1.

static.ddmcdn.com

2.

www.quitor.com

3. DIAF, seriously.
2013-07-12 10:44:50 AM  
1 vote:
The best part about this stunt is that you know Cassidy and the other republicans are now going to have recurring dreams about forgetting that a book report was due.  That's probably why this made them so cranky.
2013-07-12 10:36:09 AM  
1 vote:
"Representative Takano's action and grandstanding represent everything Americans hate about Washington, but I won't let his partisanship stand for all of us," Cassidy said. "My colleagues and I are absolutely going to keep requesting that the Speaker listen to the American people, not the big money interests and rank partisans trying to bully and intimidate members of Congress to quickly pass this massive amnesty bill."

So he responds to critiques by attacking the person making them, drifts off-topic by talking about special interests, and makes assertions about the motives and actions of others without evidence. If only there were someone who could help him avoid making such mistakes.
2013-07-12 10:25:19 AM  
1 vote:
A using? What, is the hero tag on vacation?
2013-07-12 10:08:28 AM  
1 vote:

Diogenes: The "it's too long" argument is getting to be one of my favorites.  It should invite the ridicule of every voting American.  But it's become a valid excuse because we've become a nation of lazy dumbasses.

I would LOVE to be able to use that excuse on my job.  "Please fact check this manual against the product."  "Sorry, too long."


Yeah, that wouldn't work where I work either.

'Can you update the fax script to use the new invoice template?'
"Sorry, too long."
'Well then, sorry. Didn't mean to take up your time... WAIT A MINUTE FARK YOU GET TO IT!'


/Fark is OK though
//Of course I am the one that decides that.
 
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