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(CBS New York)   Hempstead (Long Island) students take their school issued summer reading list to the library in search of F. Scott Fitzgerald's "The Great Gypsy" as well as classics by George Ornell and Emily Bonte   (newyork.cbslocal.com) divider line 71
    More: Fail, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Hempstead School District, collections  
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2562 clicks; posted to Geek » on 11 Jul 2013 at 6:17 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-11 09:48:23 AM  

Thunderboy: calbert: sounds like a bunch of Alfred Einstein's working at that school.

A bunch of his what?



You know, that German guy that invented the Theory of Relatives?  E = Young MC?
 
2013-07-11 09:50:39 AM  
My mom and grandmother live in Hempstead and by and large, the town is a pit. Hempstead is the Nassau County seat, and while Nassau has some of the best school districts in the nation, Hempstead is pretty much just urban blight, much of it looking like the 1970s never went away.
 
2013-07-11 10:13:28 AM  
Ah, the classics...

I memember my daze as a yout, reeding the likes of Jonathan Swiffer, Hearts of Darkniss, A Tail of Two Mockingbirds, ets
 
2013-07-11 10:28:31 AM  
"All Quiet on the Eastern Font"

"Animal Fume"

"Brave Nude Girl"
 
2013-07-11 10:30:23 AM  
"I think it's disgusting. People need to learn English," said Nancy Schadt of Lynbrook. "No public institution should be sending out improper information."

No schadt, shirlock.
 
2013-07-11 10:31:03 AM  

give me doughnuts: Abacus9: My favorite is Rod Breadberry's Furryheight 4fitty.


Didn't he make that TV show "Star Track"?


Naw, that was that movie with Hand Solo and Dark Baker, wasn't it?
 
2013-07-11 10:42:17 AM  

Sinister Urge: Do they have anything by Edmund Wells?


And we are done here. Why oh why didn't subby go with A Sale of Two Titties by Charles Dikkens?
 
2013-07-11 10:44:42 AM  

PaulRB: ltr77: PaulRB:
Really?  Bringing politics into our fun fest.  OK, I'll play.  What if we find out that the person who came up with the list was a graduate of that fine educational school, Liberty University?  Or some other conservative poor excuse for a college of higher learning?

We know that can't be true, it's a list for reading books, not burning them.

Really, what was I thinking?

Here is this year's Liberty University reading list:

1. The Bible
2. The Bible Part 2, Electric Boogaloo
3. Still More Bible
4. The Bible (now with pictures)
5. The Bible (now with more Jesus)
6. The Bible (with all that stuff about the poor removed - the Koch Brothers edition)
7. How Come Everyone's not Reading the Bible
8. Bible, Bible, Bible ... Sunday, Sunday, Sunday
9. More Bible Than You Know What To Do With
10. 50 Shades of Grey (what? how'd that get in there)


You think fundies actually READ the Bible? Lol. Seriously though check out Ken's Guide to the Bible.
 
2013-07-11 11:29:19 AM  
I wonder if they have a Ben Hur 1860, the third edition, the one with the erratum on page 116.
 
2013-07-11 11:52:20 AM  

theorellior: I wonder if they have a Ben Hur 1860, the third edition, the one with the erratum on page 116.


static.guim.co.uk


the stuff that dams are made of.
 
2013-07-11 12:19:48 PM  
Given that it's Hempstead, I'm not surprised. Of course, you only need to travel a few miles from Hempstead to get into some of the richest real estate in the country, which, unsurprisingly, has some of the best public schools in the country attached to it.

I'll give you a wild guess as to the general skin colors attached to those respective areas.
 
2013-07-11 12:27:39 PM  
The All-Powerful Atheismo: Sinister Urge: Stickwick Stapers by Farles Wickens with four M's and a silent Q!

Karnaby Fudge by Darles Chickens


I preferred Ovular Twats.
 
2013-07-11 12:41:43 PM  

PaulRB: Really? Bringing politics into our fun fest. OK, I'll play. What if we find out that the person who came up with the list was a graduate of that fine educational school, Liberty University? Or some other conservative poor excuse for a college of higher learning?


i actually saw someone with a "Liberity University" sticker on their car like it was a real school the other day. I was a bit surprised they've taken the joke that far, but then i figured they must be selling them as gag gifts on their website, like the onion does.
 
2013-07-11 12:47:30 PM  

PaulRB: dahmers love zombie: Rarnaby Budge?

Knickerless Knickerby?

What will be claimed:  The list was sent out "ironically", to see if the kids could even recognize the names/authors of great literature.

What will be the truth: List was typed up by teacher's aide hired to fill protected status category rather than on basis of actual ability to do job.

Really?  Bringing politics into our fun fest.  OK, I'll play.  What if we find out that the person who came up with the list was a graduate of that fine educational school, Liberty University?  Or some other conservative poor excuse for a college of higher learning?


I'd go with "able to survive without a salary until a position opens up that will accept interning as experience".  Because the teacher's aids have such an amazing union, and are so wonderfully managed by the all-wise educational board that they shouldn't have one anyway.
 
2013-07-11 12:59:29 PM  
What probably happened:

1. some flunky was tasked to come up with a summer reading list
2. instead of coming up with their own list, an existing list from another district was 'appropriated'
3. that list was scanned using a shiatty scanner and basic OCR software with a minimal dictionary and set to 'best guess'
4. the scanned document got a header change to correct the school name and was sent out without checking for book/author accuracy
5. hilarity ensued
 
2013-07-11 03:44:46 PM  

art_shamsky: My mom and grandmother live in Hempstead and by and large, the town is a pit. Hempstead is the Nassau County seat, and while Nassau has some of the best school districts in the nation, Hempstead is pretty much just urban blight, much of it looking like the 1970s never went away.


No, Mineola is the county seat.  Mineola's in the town of North Hempstead, though.  But nassau County's buildings are really in Garden City, which isn't a city, despite its name.

/Only reason to go to Hempstead is Rolling Thunder Cycles.
//Can't find a shop even remotely as good in NJ...
 
2013-07-11 05:00:58 PM  
images.wikia.com
 
2013-07-11 09:52:58 PM  

Pants full of macaroni!!: I CAN'T READ!!!!!


You can't...   read?
RIGHT! Sit down, sit down! Sit! Sit! Are you sitting comfortably? Right... "Ethel the Aardvark was hopping down the lane... "
 
2013-07-12 06:21:15 AM  
Ah, the classics! Who can forget the great works of Mike Train, William Falconer, Mario Hemmingway, Dusty Effisky, Victor Yugo, or the Labonte sisters, Ella and Bobbi? Kids these days just don't value the literature we had, or even have it available anymore. Why, I remember sitting long hours in the school library reading "A Capture In Your Eye" and the original, uncensored version of "Huckleberry Fu" and now they're pretty much banned from school libraries. And it's not like they're making new books like the old ones. Where's anything at all like Alton Buxley's "Bold New Word" or Fitzgerald Scott's "The Great Fugazi"? Nowhere, my friend, nowhere.

Of course, it's been awhile since I read any real books. Mostly everything's electronic these days and, well, I confess I watch more movie adaptations of books than I read anymore. Like recently I went to see that remake of "Muchly Doing About Nothing" because I love Shakestone's plays and I'm a big fan of Joe Sweden.
 
2013-07-12 11:02:40 AM  
FTFA: "It's sad," one mother said. "I read 'The Great Gatsby,' that was in high school, and watched it on TV with Robert Redford, but this here, I didn't read 'The Great Gypsy,' I couldn't find that nowhere."

BS. I doubt she has even made it through One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish. That is the grammar of an illiterate.
 
2013-07-12 11:08:10 AM  

Paris1127: What's a summer reading course without such literary classics James Fentiman Cowper's  The Lost of the Mohawks,Carla Bonte's  Jayne Air, or Marc Twane's F*ckleberry Hinn or  A Taxachusetts Libtard in Jesus's Court?


Sounds like The Asylum is now into book publishing.
 
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