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(Guardian)   Study finds benefit in delaying cutting of the umbilical cord, but urges it be done before your kids get a job or married   (guardian.co.uk) divider line 36
    More: Interesting, federal benefits, clinical practice, breathing difficulties  
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4877 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jul 2013 at 3:04 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



36 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-07-11 03:05:15 AM
I need to consult with my mother about this.
 
2013-07-11 03:07:48 AM
blog.zap2it.com
 
2013-07-11 03:09:52 AM
Ehh, evidence based medicine.
 
2013-07-11 03:10:33 AM
Congratulations dad, it's a girl... unless I cut the wrong cord!
 
2013-07-11 03:11:46 AM
Well, let's just have newborns stinking up the neonatal rooms with their rotting afterbirth sticking out of their bellies.

That sounds like a great idea, scientists! Way to go!
 
2013-07-11 03:19:56 AM
Now is the time for "just no."
 
2013-07-11 03:24:41 AM
Just found out my ex-wife sent my daughters off to a very expensive summer camp, so uh, to defray costs, she took a job at the summer camp too. My daughters are in middle school and high school, attending summer camp with their mom.
 
2013-07-11 03:26:48 AM

RoyBatty: Just found out my ex-wife sent my daughters off to a very expensive summer camp, so uh, to defray costs, she took a job at the summer camp too. My daughters are in middle school and high school, attending summer camp with their mom.


I think I've seen that movie.
 
2013-07-11 03:28:38 AM
FTFA: "Cutting the cord too early denies babies an important supply of blood and can also reduce the amount of iron a newborn receives, according to a study by the highly-respected Cochrane Library of medical researchers."

www.nilnocere.hu
/not my image
 
2013-07-11 03:33:18 AM

DarkSoulNoHope: Congratulations dad, it's a girl... unless I cut the wrong cord!


I can quite easily imagine a future where male humans evolve to have multiple penises, so just throw that into the mix I guess.
Multiple penises? Well, until relatively recently we evolved with sex as a reproductive arrangement between two people but since we entered the age of mass-sluttery and shattered morals a few years ago, with no sign of ever going back to anything like regular flavor one-on-one sex then it's fair to assume that nature will adapt.
Soon we'll be able to have sex, proper thrusting in all directions and coming from your ass, groin, neck and elbow sex, with as many people as we have penises. No more of this group sex scenario where there are eight people all clamouring about on a California King, belching the cheap wine that got them there and trying not to allow the host's dog to sniff their junk... all scrabbling about for a penis to sit on but finding there's not enough for one each... no, in the not too distant future (thanks to accelerated evolution, in turn courtesy of the shocking mess our DNA is in now) we can all have penises stuffed in every hole and still have spare ones just hanging there, waiting.
It's safe to assume that this will happen in the next five years, as with all evolutionary leaps it will change the course mankind takes through this cosmic broth we call reality, but only for the better.
 
2013-07-11 03:53:37 AM
I was looking for that tomato commercial where the angry tomato recommends his brand because, "They ripen on that vine," but I couldn't find it. Now my joke is ruined.
 
2013-07-11 03:56:57 AM
In other news, the NHS joins most of the civilized world. This isn't exactly "new"--I've been hearing this for a couple decades at least.
 
2013-07-11 04:17:27 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Well, let's just have newborns stinking up the neonatal rooms with their rotting afterbirth sticking out of their bellies.

That sounds like a great idea, scientists! Way to go!


The Scientists are saying only to delay clamping the cord until the placenta is out of the mother, rather than clamping it right when the baby gets out. They've studied this and saw it was beneficial if the infants received their mother's blood supply as long as possible.

Don't get this confused with that Lotus Birth crap that is all the rage with the New Age folks and Hippies. As if Hippies didn't smell bad already...
 
2013-07-11 04:18:21 AM

YoOjo: DarkSoulNoHope: Congratulations dad, it's a girl... unless I cut the wrong cord!

I can quite easily imagine a future where male humans evolve to have multiple penises, so just throw that into the mix I guess.
Multiple penises? Well, until relatively recently we evolved with sex as a reproductive arrangement between two people but since we entered the age of mass-sluttery and shattered morals a few years ago, with no sign of ever going back to anything like regular flavor one-on-one sex then it's fair to assume that nature will adapt.
Soon we'll be able to have sex, proper thrusting in all directions and coming from your ass, groin, neck and elbow sex, with as many people as we have penises. No more of this group sex scenario where there are eight people all clamouring about on a California King, belching the cheap wine that got them there and trying not to allow the host's dog to sniff their junk... all scrabbling about for a penis to sit on but finding there's not enough for one each... no, in the not too distant future (thanks to accelerated evolution, in turn courtesy of the shocking mess our DNA is in now) we can all have penises stuffed in every hole and still have spare ones just hanging there, waiting.
It's safe to assume that this will happen in the next five years, as with all evolutionary leaps it will change the course mankind takes through this cosmic broth we call reality, but only for the better.


Sounds good to me. I love me some cock.
 
2013-07-11 04:27:56 AM

YoOjo: DarkSoulNoHope: Congratulations dad, it's a girl... unless I cut the wrong cord!

I can quite easily imagine a future where male humans evolve to have multiple penises, so just throw that into the mix I guess.
Multiple penises? Well, until relatively recently we evolved with sex as a reproductive arrangement between two people but since we entered the age of mass-sluttery and shattered morals a few years ago, with no sign of ever going back to anything like regular flavor one-on-one sex then it's fair to assume that nature will adapt.
Soon we'll be able to have sex, proper thrusting in all directions and coming from your ass, groin, neck and elbow sex, with as many people as we have penises. No more of this group sex scenario where there are eight people all clamouring about on a California King, belching the cheap wine that got them there and trying not to allow the host's dog to sniff their junk... all scrabbling about for a penis to sit on but finding there's not enough for one each... no, in the not too distant future (thanks to accelerated evolution, in turn courtesy of the shocking mess our DNA is in now) we can all have penises stuffed in every hole and still have spare ones just hanging there, waiting.
It's safe to assume that this will happen in the next five years, as with all evolutionary leaps it will change the course mankind takes through this cosmic broth we call reality, but only for the better.


I don't think you're supposed to drink the bong water, man.
 
2013-07-11 05:32:01 AM
That's a really simplistic article. If the blood pressure is higher in the baby than the placenta because of an atonic uterus or if the baby is more elevated than the placenta because the tables are at different heights then the baby is going to be bleeding out through the umbilical cord. Blood volume is 7% of body weight so a 3 kg or 6.6 lb baby has 210 cc of blood or 7/8 of a pop can's worth and without even a central venous pressure even a trauma guy wouldn't know where he's at let alone a coochie doctor and a pediatrician.

So the article is advocating in favor of curing some iron deficiency at the risk of killing babies. I'll go with post natal vitamins thanks anyway.
 
2013-07-11 05:39:34 AM
If you'd gone with the homebirth, your midwife would have already told you this.
 
2013-07-11 05:44:30 AM
Is this to happen before or after you all smother the placenta in A1 sauce and chow down?

And does this take place in the pool....?

I'm losing track of all the *correct* ways to have a baby.
 
2013-07-11 05:50:15 AM
Huh, when my kid was born it was a good 15 or 20 minutes before they got around to the cord clamping and tests and things.  Long after the afterbirth was passed in any case.  I thought that was SOP.
 
2013-07-11 06:28:59 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-07-11 06:36:41 AM
Want your newborn to have more iron?  Fine, hit it with a cast iron frying pan.
 
2013-07-11 06:37:25 AM

Bob The Nob: [i.imgur.com image 300x154]


Is that the machine that goes ping that I see in the background?
 
2013-07-11 06:50:28 AM

gadian: Huh, when my kid was born it was a good 15 or 20 minutes before they got around to the cord clamping and tests and things.  Long after the afterbirth was passed in any case.  I thought that was SOP.




It is in some areas, not in others. I lived in Ottawa when my son was born, and that was standard at the hospital where he was born. When I expressed this to my OB here in my home province while pregnant with my daughter as my preference, he was so horrified you'd have thought I asked him to cut the cord with his teeth. They tend to be rather old fashioned and stuck in their ways here, and not just in obstetrics.
 
2013-07-11 07:16:39 AM

YoOjo: DarkSoulNoHope: Congratulations dad, it's a girl... unless I cut the wrong cord!

I can quite easily imagine a future where male humans evolve to have multiple penises, so just throw that into the mix I guess.
Multiple penises? Well, until relatively recently we evolved with sex as a reproductive arrangement between two people but since we entered the age of mass-sluttery and shattered morals a few years ago, with no sign of ever going back to anything like regular flavor one-on-one sex then it's fair to assume that nature will adapt.
Soon we'll be able to have sex, proper thrusting in all directions and coming from your ass, groin, neck and elbow sex, with as many people as we have penises. No more of this group sex scenario where there are eight people all clamouring about on a California King, belching the cheap wine that got them there and trying not to allow the host's dog to sniff their junk... all scrabbling about for a penis to sit on but finding there's not enough for one each... no, in the not too distant future (thanks to accelerated evolution, in turn courtesy of the shocking mess our DNA is in now) we can all have penises stuffed in every hole and still have spare ones just hanging there, waiting.
It's safe to assume that this will happen in the next five years, as with all evolutionary leaps it will change the course mankind takes through this cosmic broth we call reality, but only for the better.


You are now farkied as Elbow Sex.
 
2013-07-11 07:26:08 AM

Mock26: Bob The Nob: [i.imgur.com image 300x154]

Is that the machine that goes ping that I see in the background?


No, that's the most expensive machine in the hospital. You know, we sold it and leased it back from the vendor so we can claim it as a capital expense instead of an operational one.
 
2013-07-11 07:29:48 AM

HaywoodJablonski: Mock26: Bob The Nob: [i.imgur.com image 300x154]

Is that the machine that goes ping that I see in the background?

No, that's the most expensive machine in the hospital. You know, we sold it and leased it back from the vendor so we can claim it as a capital expense instead of an operational one.


Bah. I farked that up
 
2013-07-11 08:04:19 AM
I don't even remember what they did with my kids...my son was jaundiced for about a month, though he never ended up needing anything for it. He was a great eater and took care of it himself by flushing it out. He was 15 lbs at his 2 month checkup, and 30 lbs now at 21 months...he's still a good eater. My daughter actually had a birth defect where her bladder was still attached to her umbilicus (urachal remnant) therefore making it impossible for her belly button to heal because of the drainage. She had surgery at one month old to remove the tube and fix the hernia. They did it through her belly button, so you'd never know. They did make her belly button very cute, though.
 
2013-07-11 08:16:12 AM

OscarTamerz: That's a really simplistic article. If the blood pressure is higher in the baby than the placenta because of an atonic uterus or if the baby is more elevated than the placenta because the tables are at different heights then the baby is going to be bleeding out through the umbilical cord. Blood volume is 7% of body weight so a 3 kg or 6.6 lb baby has 210 cc of blood or 7/8 of a pop can's worth and without even a central venous pressure even a trauma guy wouldn't know where he's at let alone a coochie doctor and a pediatrician.

So the article is advocating in favor of curing some iron deficiency at the risk of killing babies. I'll go with post natal vitamins thanks anyway.



Your opposition to the advancement of science is really simplistic. I suggest you research those two scenarios a bit more.
 
2013-07-11 08:27:13 AM
 
2013-07-11 08:49:05 AM
I guess a Cochrane review is a kind of a study, but it's not what scientists are actually talking about when they talk about a study.  The expression "Garbage in, garbage out" is a criticism of poorly done studies.  A Cochrane review is the result when someone sees a poorly done study and decides "Maybe we just need more garbage."
 
2013-07-11 09:11:18 AM

icepriestess: OscarTamerz: That's a really simplistic article. If the blood pressure is higher in the baby than the placenta because of an atonic uterus or if the baby is more elevated than the placenta because the tables are at different heights then the baby is going to be bleeding out through the umbilical cord. Blood volume is 7% of body weight so a 3 kg or 6.6 lb baby has 210 cc of blood or 7/8 of a pop can's worth and without even a central venous pressure even a trauma guy wouldn't know where he's at let alone a coochie doctor and a pediatrician.

So the article is advocating in favor of curing some iron deficiency at the risk of killing babies. I'll go with post natal vitamins thanks anyway.


Your opposition to the advancement of science is really simplistic. I suggest you research those two scenarios a bit more.


He used the phrase "coochie doctor."  I don't think you need to bother replying.
 
2013-07-11 09:13:13 AM

tuna fingers: If you'd gone with the homebirth, your midwife would have already told you this.


We always waited until there is no longer a pulse in the cord, which means that blood is no longer flowing between mother and baby (and that the afterbirth is just about ready to come out). We were taught that cutting the cord too soon increases the chance of hemorrhage in the mother.
 
2013-07-11 09:30:09 AM

catmandu: tuna fingers: If you'd gone with the homebirth, your midwife would have already told you this.

We always waited until there is no longer a pulse in the cord, which means that blood is no longer flowing between mother and baby (and that the afterbirth is just about ready to come out). We were taught that cutting the cord too soon increases the chance of hemorrhage in the mother.


Um, blood isn't really supposed to flow between baby and mother.  And once the placenta is about ready to come out, that means it's separated from the uterus and the baby is actually losing blood.  That's usually not a big deal, but it's completely contrary to any supposed benefits of delaying cord clamping.
 
2013-07-11 10:31:25 AM

catmandu: We always waited until there is no longer a pulse in the cord


That's what I learned in EMT training (as of last winter).  Usually just a few minutes, then clamp once it stops pulsing.
 
2013-07-11 01:46:40 PM

Funkyourdaughter: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Veo6tefwrwc


Glad someone posted it.
 
2013-07-11 01:59:29 PM

Sparky the Fire Dog: catmandu: We always waited until there is no longer a pulse in the cord

That's what I learned in EMT training (as of last winter).  Usually just a few minutes, then clamp once it stops pulsing.


I think the longest we waited was about 10 or 15 minutes. It tended to go faster if the mother put baby to breast right away or if daddy played around with mommy's nips. Stimulating the nipples helps trigger the uterine contractions that cause the placenta to separate and the pulsing in the cord to stop.
 
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