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(USA Today)   By day, he's a quiet screenprinter. But by night, this vigilante takes to the streets to clean up the problems that the city can't--or won't--fix. Local residents only know him as...The Patchman   ( usatoday.com) divider line
    More: Interesting  
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7723 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jul 2013 at 9:39 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



36 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-07-10 08:03:08 AM  
Rogue repairman does what the government can't or won't. I saw this movie. It did not end well. Unless you watched it on American broadcast television.
 
2013-07-10 08:15:48 AM  
Jackson MS is as bad as Detroit. If you are thinking of moving there, don't. It is a cesspool.
 
2013-07-10 08:26:01 AM  
I'm unable to vouch for his superhero credentials until I see what he looks like in brightly colored spandex. Sadly, this is is where most superheros fail. It takes a lot of time at the gym to really rock up enough to be taken seriously.
 
2013-07-10 08:46:25 AM  
Maybe it's just me, but when I see stuff like this, I think "Damn, if somebody gets injured or have some sort of damage on their car related to some sort of flawed patching, then that guy is going to get sued."
 
2013-07-10 09:01:58 AM  
Let me tell you how it will be
One done by the city, nineteen by me
'Cause I'm the patchman, yeah, I'm the patchman

Should five per cent appear too small
Be thankful I don't do them all
'Cause I'm the patchman, yeah I'm the patchman


/With apologies to J,P,G & R
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-07-10 09:04:52 AM  
The city will also be sued in case of accident, and will use that as an excuse to shut the guy down. (Not to mention the theft angle.) A lot of government agencies don't even want people picking up trash. In my area you are likely to be told you need a huge insurance policy or you can't do it at all because you're not in the union.  Those clean-the-road-in-return-for-a-sign programs often require you to pay for a government approved contractor to pick up trash.
 
2013-07-10 09:11:45 AM  
Zimmerman?
 
2013-07-10 09:31:10 AM  
Personally, I think just using the spray paint to point to the holes and say "WATCH OUT!" would be bringing attention to the problem with much less work and liability.
 
2013-07-10 09:33:50 AM  

ZAZ: Rogue repairman does what the government can't or won't. I saw this movie. It did not end well. Unless you watched it on American broadcast television.


You can't post that without a twenty seven B stroke six.
 
2013-07-10 09:43:08 AM  
Harry Tuttle?
 
2013-07-10 09:44:14 AM  
There is the mother of all potholes (like a mortar crater) that has gone unfixed for years near to home and if some random citizen took  it upon himself to fill it correctly I would call him a hero.
 
2013-07-10 09:44:50 AM  
Saw vigilante thought this was a Zimmerman thread, damn media
 
2013-07-10 09:46:00 AM  
Patch Adams? That movie sucked.
 
2013-07-10 09:48:58 AM  
Who can take a pothole, sprinkle it with tar
Cover it with asphalt and a miracle or two
The Pothole Man, oh the Pothole Man can
The Pothole Man can 'cause he mixes it with love and makes the world look good


Adapted from source: http://www.lyricsondemand.com/s/sammydavisjrlyrics/thecandymanlyrics. h tml
 
2013-07-10 09:50:44 AM  

Recoil Therapy: Let me tell you how it will be
One done by the city, nineteen by me
'Cause I'm the patchman, yeah, I'm the patchman

Should five per cent appear too small
Be thankful I don't do them all
'Cause I'm the patchman, yeah I'm the patchman


/With apologies to J,P,G & R


funnied.

*golf applause*
 
2013-07-10 09:51:19 AM  
And he is arrested in 3.......2........
 
2013-07-10 09:54:07 AM  
Recycled Asphalt makes a really shiatty patching material.
 
2013-07-10 09:55:30 AM  
I'm surprised he hasn't been run over yet.

No good deed goes unpunished.
 
2013-07-10 09:57:10 AM  
Who patches the Patchman?
 
2013-07-10 09:57:18 AM  

berylman: There is the mother of all potholes (like a mortar crater) that has gone unfixed for years near to home and if some random citizen took  it upon himself to fill it correctly I would call him a hero.


Why don't you?


Seriously, I've filled a few myself at some point or another in my life... grab a bucket of stones, it's temporary, but at least it's something.. one was right in front of my driveway, I couldn't get in or out without the risk of hitting it.

The worse one I've seen lately (and they just finally fixed it after a couple of months), was more than just a pothole, it looked like the street was about to collapse, I expected a sink hole to crack open...

This was a warping of the asphalt, for over 6 feet wide with the worse ripple/part probably capable of ripping a car's axel out had someone hit it fast enough.

.
 
2013-07-10 09:58:00 AM  
There's a closet videogame geek working for USA Today, hiding veiled references in headlines:

"Miss. patchman takes on city's pothole problems"

/I see what you did there
 
2013-07-10 09:58:34 AM  
Dear Patchman,

This letter comes to you from the lobby of a BellTire. It hurts my heart to be here all the goddamn time. Please...please come to Detroit (and most of MI). Please. For the children.

-megarian
 
2013-07-10 10:05:12 AM  
There's a road near me where the multiple lanes are too narrow. I'm going to make it a two lane comfort cruise.
 
2013-07-10 10:06:08 AM  
For some reason I read that headline in the style of the A-Team voice over.

/And now I wanna watch Brazil.
 
2013-07-10 10:06:40 AM  
FTFA:
"The city cannot do everything," Lindsay added. "The government can't take care of everyone, so I applaud any citizen for stepping up to fix the problem."

I'm pretty sure maintaining the roads is one of the things the government is specifically supposed to do.  Oh wait, this is Mississippi, they have to spend their tax money on preventing abortions and promoting bigotry.  My mistake.
 
2013-07-10 10:12:52 AM  
He's already inked a deal to star in Kick Ass III: Roadwork
 
2013-07-10 10:40:51 AM  
I'm unable to vouch for his superhero credentials until I see what he looks like in brightly colored spandex. Sadly, this is is where most superheros fail. It takes a lot of time at the gym to really rock up enough to be taken seriously.

If he doesn't wear a black top, I'd be very disappointed.
 
2013-07-10 11:38:00 AM  
But in an article earlier on fark a man riding in an ambulance that hit a pot hole had his heart restarted from the jolt. So what now?
 
2013-07-10 11:49:26 AM  

EnviroDude: Jackson MS is as bad as Detroit. If you are thinking of moving there, don't. It is a cesspool.


True 'dat
 
2013-07-10 12:45:40 PM  

fallingblox: There's a closet videogame geek working for USA Today, hiding veiled references in headlines:

"Miss. patchman takes on city's pothole problems"

/I see what you did there


Yep, came here to say this!

/that's MS. Patchman, tyvm
 
2013-07-10 01:24:23 PM  

hogans: I'm unable to vouch for his superhero credentials until I see what he looks like in brightly colored spandex. Sadly, this is is where most superheros fail. It takes a lot of time at the gym to really rock up enough to be taken seriously.

If he doesn't wear a black top, I'd be very disappointed.


A patched black top.
 
2013-07-10 02:22:17 PM  
Hank Hill?
 
2013-07-10 03:06:35 PM  
Kinda reminds me of this guy.
 
2013-07-10 03:28:12 PM  
As a former screenprinter, all I can add is... screen rules, flexo drools.
 
2013-07-10 04:09:22 PM  
So, you are allowing your local politicians to continue to skim money from your taxes instead of forcing them to fix the problems your taxes are suppose to fix?

Fool.
 
2013-07-10 09:51:15 PM  

ZAZ: Rogue repairman does what the government can't or won't. I saw this movie. It did not end well. Unless you watched it on American broadcast television.


I assume you are after this reference:
lh5.googleusercontent.com If you aren't then Tuttle, Tuttle, Tuttle.
 
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