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(Slate)   When ice cream sales go up, so does the murder rate. That's 'cause I got some ice cream. And you ain't got none. Because you on welfare and can't afford it. And your father is an alcoholic. You want to eat some? Want a lick? PSYCH   (slate.com) divider line 146
    More: Interesting, murder rate, Times-Picayune  
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4769 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jul 2013 at 12:05 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



146 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-07-09 10:30:26 PM
Classic Eddie Murphy.

But for some reason it put the Cosby "Dad is great. He gave us chocolate cake" bit in my head.
 
2013-07-09 10:31:32 PM
That's old school right there.
 
2013-07-09 10:43:09 PM
Brut, by Faberge.
 
2013-07-09 10:55:46 PM
Well done Subby.  +1 Would read again.
 
2013-07-09 11:36:14 PM
Ahh I miss the old Eddie
 
2013-07-10 12:08:01 AM
Ahhh, the good 'ol days, when Eddie was funny.
 
2013-07-10 12:08:10 AM
Do the part about the really juicy hamburger but the dumbass kid preferred McDonalds.
 
2013-07-10 12:08:13 AM
Subby, you gunky.
 
2013-07-10 12:09:13 AM
I-I-I-I want the kniiife

/he was funny
 
2013-07-10 12:09:26 AM
for you youngin's who don't get the headline:


Link Maybe NSFW
 
2013-07-10 12:11:05 AM
Give them French Vanilla. Then all they will want to do is surrender.
 
2013-07-10 12:12:35 AM
Makes sense.  We all scream for ice cream, murder.
 
2013-07-10 12:12:36 AM
The correlating factor is the weather.

Someone said "The only thing that reduces the murder rate is snowstorms."
 
2013-07-10 12:14:32 AM
I got in an argument here on the main page, or perhaps tfd after someone wrote "sike!"Most people agreed with the sike guy. You have validated me subby!
 
2013-07-10 12:15:38 AM
If I dropped my ice cream I'd probably go all rampagey too
 
2013-07-10 12:16:19 AM
images.starpulse.com
 
2013-07-10 12:16:19 AM
When ice cream sales go up, so does the murder rate

"It's the ice cream man biatch, don't you hear the music?
I got the shiat fiends want, holla at me when they use it"
 
2013-07-10 12:16:56 AM

tuna fingers: I got in an argument here on the main page, or perhaps tfd after someone wrote "sike!"Most people agreed with the sike guy. You have validated me subby!


It's psychological warfare, how would it NOT be psych?
 
2013-07-10 12:16:57 AM
 
2013-07-10 12:19:37 AM
Here the ghetto ass ice cream truck
It be nearby
It's comin
I hear that mofrkka
YEAH
COME ON
UNH
GET IT
bring that mofrkka


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yQfzyz1LFGQ
 
2013-07-10 12:20:26 AM
It's because of those ice cream trucks.
 
2013-07-10 12:20:31 AM
Whoah.... that takes me back.
 
2013-07-10 12:21:57 AM

Nabb1: That's old school right there.


That can't be old school.  Because that stuff was new and fresh when I was a kid and that was only...DAMNIT!
 
2013-07-10 12:23:03 AM

MFAWG: [images.starpulse.com image 400x600]


For a minute I thought that was Jackée Harry.
 
2013-07-10 12:23:53 AM

PedanticSimpleton: Here the ghetto ass ice cream truck
It be nearby
It's comin
I hear that mofrkka
YEAH
COME ON
UNH
GET IT
bring that mofrkka


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yQfzyz1LFGQ


Reminds me of motherfarking bootleg fireworks, shiat.

MONEY UNDER MOUF RUNNIN
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRItYDKSqpQ
 
2013-07-10 12:24:50 AM
Eddie's ice cream bit was pretty damned funny, but his story about his brother in the bathtub with G.I Joe literally had me in tears.
 
2013-07-10 12:24:58 AM

JasonOfOrillia: MFAWG: [images.starpulse.com image 400x600]

For a minute I thought that was Jackée Harry.


Holy crap, you're exactly right! And OLD!
 
2013-07-10 12:26:47 AM

MFAWG: JasonOfOrillia: MFAWG: [images.starpulse.com image 400x600]

For a minute I thought that was Jackée Harry.

Holy crap, you're exactly right! And OLD!


Bonus old points if you didn't have to google.
 
2013-07-10 12:26:47 AM
Step aside.
 
2013-07-10 12:27:21 AM
Man I remember that record. Laughing my rear off.
 
2013-07-10 12:27:22 AM
I don't recall the ice cream bit but I'm constantly reminded how his uncle shaved a Big Foot and married it and how all his cousins could stick their faces in the water and come up with fish in their mouths.


www.fireandreamitchell.com

OOGA BOOGA
 
2013-07-10 12:28:35 AM

DoctorCal: Do the part about the really juicy hamburger but the dumbass kid preferred McDonalds.


I remember those days.  And it wasn't that McD's was great.  It was that all the other kids had it and not having what everyone else had made you different and, therefore, a target of mockery because kids are farking monsters.

And now I want a welfare burger with green peppers in it on white bread mooshed with ketchup.  'cause, ugly or not, they're delicious.  Put a slab of government cheese on mine.
 
2013-07-10 12:28:37 AM

JasonOfOrillia: MFAWG: JasonOfOrillia: MFAWG: [images.starpulse.com image 400x600]

For a minute I thought that was Jackée Harry.

Holy crap, you're exactly right! And OLD!

Bonus old points if you didn't have to google.


I hadn't even thought about her in a dozen years, but no google needed here.
 
2013-07-10 12:28:51 AM
Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!
 
2013-07-10 12:30:02 AM
Free speech, Ladies and Gentlemen, and may we all die defending it!
 
2013-07-10 12:31:11 AM
dammit subby, now I'm watching all of Delirious and probably keeping the rest of the hotel awake.
 
2013-07-10 12:31:41 AM
My old pick up line..You scream and I will kill ya.
 
2013-07-10 12:31:57 AM

MFAWG: [images.starpulse.com image 400x600]


goony goo goo
 
2013-07-10 12:32:24 AM

Mangoose: Classic Eddie Murphy.

But for some reason it put the Cosby "Dad is great. He gave us chocolate cake" bit in my head.


Grew up listening to this:

cdn.7static.com

I remember the part when he was going to get his tonsils removed and all he cared about was all the ice cream you can eat!

Classic album.
 
2013-07-10 12:33:32 AM
I guess the only thing I can add is that Eddie Murphy's current girlfriend is some hot Australian model, Paige Butcher. And when I Google pictures of her, it seems like she and Eddie like to go out for coffee a lot. Nice looking bush biatch he has there.

assets.nydailynews.com
blackthespian.com
in2eastafrica.net
thejasminebrand.com

/HALF!
 
2013-07-10 12:33:34 AM
I could drop my ice cream in a pile of shiat and eat it.

I'd be all like: "Its just shiat....like sprinkles!"
 
2013-07-10 12:34:24 AM

skinink: I guess the only thing I can add is that Eddie Murphy's current girlfriend is some hot Australian model, Paige Butcher. And when I Google pictures of her, it seems like she and Eddie like to go out for coffee a lot. Nice looking bush biatch he has there.

[assets.nydailynews.com image 635x489]
[blackthespian.com image 634x868]
[in2eastafrica.net image 634x707]
[thejasminebrand.com image 482x594]

/HALF!


Looks like he's finally entered his fark years.
 
2013-07-10 12:34:34 AM

fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!


After a week without air conditioning, the inside of my house was 90 degrees.  I believe this statistic - even if you just totally made it up - because dear lord in heaven, I was not happy with life.  Dogs even less so.
 
2013-07-10 12:35:57 AM

Psycoholic_Slag: Grew up listening to this:


Me too. Have a CD copy of it now. Still one of the best comedy albums around.

"The BELT will  WAIL tonight!"

/we had never seen "THE BELT"

//but we had HEARD about it.
 
2013-07-10 12:36:11 AM

skinink: I guess the only thing I can add is that Eddie Murphy's current girlfriend is some hot Australian model, Paige Butcher. And when I Google pictures of her, it seems like she and Eddie like to go out for coffee a lot. Nice looking bush biatch he has there.

[assets.nydailynews.com image 635x489]
[blackthespian.com image 634x868]
[in2eastafrica.net image 634x707]
[thejasminebrand.com image 482x594]

/HALF!


Is Adidas sponsoring comedians on the downside of their careers? Who did Nike get?
 
2013-07-10 12:36:20 AM
images4.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-07-10 12:36:45 AM

Somacandra: I could drop my ice cream in a pile of shiat and eat it.

I'd be all like: "Its just shiat....like sprinkles!"


www.thegenytimes.com

shiatTY SPRINKLES
 
2013-07-10 12:36:59 AM

skinink: I guess the only thing I can add is that Eddie Murphy's current girlfriend is some hot Australian model, Paige Butcher. And when I Google pictures of her, it seems like she and Eddie like to go out for coffee a lot. Nice looking bush biatch he has there.

[assets.nydailynews.com image 635x489]
[blackthespian.com image 634x868]
[in2eastafrica.net image 634x707]
[thejasminebrand.com image 482x594]

/HAL


When did Eddie get the Adidas sponsorship?
 
2013-07-10 12:37:28 AM
I love you subby and want to have your mulatto babies.
 
2013-07-10 12:38:09 AM

CruJones: I-I-I-I want the kniiife

/he was funny


mmmm Charlotte Lewis and RATT
 
2013-07-10 12:38:55 AM
Thank you subby! I was so down and now I'm laughing my ass off enjoying classic Eddie.
 
2013-07-10 12:39:37 AM

MountainClimber: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 455x280]


There were times I came pretty close to murdering my friends over Twisted Metal 2.

/Mr. Grimm for the win!
 
2013-07-10 12:43:29 AM
Am I the only one who thought of the ice cream truck missions from  GTA III?  Why are you chasing me Mr. police man, I'm just trying to sell some dru^H^H^H ice cream!

/at least till you dropped the mission and just went on a rampage for the fun of it
//in that ice cream truck
 
2013-07-10 12:43:34 AM
I HERD THAT shiat MAN!

THAT shiat WADDN'T FUNNY!

I SUPPOSE AT THE END OF YOUR SKIT STEVIE CRASH INTO A TREE RIGHT?

HA HA VERY FUNNY MUTHAfarkER!

YO MOMMA GOT A WOODEN LEG WITH A KICKSTAND, MUTHAfarkER
 
2013-07-10 12:47:02 AM
Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?
 
2013-07-10 12:51:39 AM

MountainClimber: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 455x280]


I miss that game.
 
2013-07-10 12:57:56 AM
Had to cut my own switch.
 
2013-07-10 12:58:12 AM
Wu-Tang in the cut, for real successful and attractive African-Americanz what?
It's the after party and biatches want to fark
Ice cold biatches melt down when my clutch
and want they titties sucked, ice cream
 
2013-07-10 01:00:09 AM
Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees than at any other temperature? At lower temperatures, people are easy-going. Higher, it's too hot to move. But just at 92, people get irritable.


Drink the water with jagged glass
Eat the cactus with bleeding mouth
Not 91 or 93 but 92 Fahrenheit degrees
 
2013-07-10 01:02:55 AM
'Cause you are on the welfare, you on the welfare. And you daddy's an alcoholic!
 
2013-07-10 01:05:52 AM

Somacandra: I HERD THAT shiat MAN!

THAT shiat WADDN'T FUNNY!

I SUPPOSE AT THE END OF YOUR SKIT STEVIE CRASH INTO A TREE RIGHT?

HA HA VERY FUNNY MUTHAfarkER!

YO MOMMA GOT A WOODEN LEG WITH A KICKSTAND, MUTHAfarkER


YO MOMMA GOT A MOUTH ON THE BACK OF HER NECK WHEN SHE EAT SHE LOOK LIKE DIS
 
2013-07-10 01:09:37 AM

Psycoholic_Slag: Mangoose: Classic Eddie Murphy.

But for some reason it put the Cosby "Dad is great. He gave us chocolate cake" bit in my head.

Grew up listening to this:

[cdn.7static.com image 350x350]

I remember the part when he was going to get his tonsils removed and all he cared about was all the ice cream you can eat!

Classic album.


Listen!  I didn't put the damn bullet in the furnace!  And stop talkin' about my mother!
 
2013-07-10 01:10:02 AM

Girion47: MFAWG: [images.starpulse.com image 400x600]

goony goo goo


thpppppthttpptptppttptptt OH LORD HELP ME thpppptthtpthhtpth OH LORD JESUStthhrhrprprhtpprh OH LORD I'M HALFWAY DOWN NOW thhhtpptphtppthhtp...
 
2013-07-10 01:14:05 AM

Z-clipped: thpppppthttpptptppttptptt OH LORD HELP ME thpppptthtpthhtpth OH LORD JESUStthhrhrprprhtpprh OH LORD I'M HALFWAY DOWN NOW thhhtpptphtppthhtp...


MY SHOE!
 
2013-07-10 01:20:19 AM
AND BRING ME BACK MY CHANGE!
 
2013-07-10 01:25:02 AM
I'm gonna let ya'll finish...but HEADLINE OF THE YEAR
 
2013-07-10 01:25:03 AM

Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?


Fried chicken flavored ice cream? You are some kind of sick, you know that?
 
2013-07-10 01:27:39 AM
Statistics 101.  Correlation is not causation.
 
2013-07-10 01:27:42 AM
Correlation does not imply causation.
 
2013-07-10 01:30:42 AM
FTA: Saying that warm weather causes crime is just as simplistic as saying ice cream causes crime.

Jesus firking Christ. Is that so?

Then, 2 sentences later:

But the correlation between temperature levels and violent crime rates is worth rememberingthe next time that....

Yep. Better start remembering things that are comparable to "ice cream causes crime."
 
2013-07-10 01:31:22 AM

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: Correlation does not imply causation.


For some definitions of "imply".
 
2013-07-10 01:31:41 AM

cgremlin: Eddie's ice cream bit was pretty damned funny, but his story about his brother in the bathtub with G.I Joe literally had me in tears.


♫♪ Here comes the big brown sharkie..♪ ♫
 
2013-07-10 01:32:03 AM
www.eonline.com
 
2013-07-10 01:33:10 AM
Jesus Christo!  Wasn't "Delirious" from 1983?  30 farking years ago?  That means the subby and anyone who remembers this film is really farking old...as me.
 
2013-07-10 01:35:42 AM

Girion47: MFAWG: [images.starpulse.com image 400x600]

goony goo goo


What the fark does "goony goo goo" mean, Gus????
 
2013-07-10 01:38:24 AM

Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?


www.bakedbyrachel.com

I'm not sure about the other two.
 
2013-07-10 01:39:23 AM
You married a Bigfoot, Gus!
 
2013-07-10 01:43:06 AM
Either the belt, or the shoe...
The beatings will now commence, kids...if...you...don't...get...in...bed...right...this...second!
 
2013-07-10 01:47:00 AM

fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!


I've lived in neighborhoods where the people are too poor to afford air conditioning but all the houses have front porches. When the evenings are too hot everybody starts hanging out on their porches and drinking beer. If it gets even hotter they still stay on the porches because it is too hot to go inside (until everybody is good and drunk maybe at 4 am).

There weren't any murders near me but the noise levels increased to a level that I wouldn't have been surprised if some of the loud arguments turned into fights.
 
2013-07-10 01:53:26 AM

Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.


OMG, that looks awesome.  Where can I get one???
 
2013-07-10 01:55:18 AM

jtown: Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.

OMG, that looks awesome.  Where can I get one???


Well, Friedly's for one, if they still exist as a restaurant. But I usually see them in my local supermarkets during the summer.

/yes it is awesome.
 
2013-07-10 02:00:24 AM

Angusmeats: Jesus Christo!  Wasn't "Delirious" from 1983?  30 farking years ago?  That means the subby and anyone who remembers this film is really farking old...as me.


Yeah, we old.
On the up side, I got my son, who is 16, singing:
*I got Micdonalls,
*dad is great-gives us the chocolate cake
...and every time the ice cream truck comes by- he's quoting subby's headline. He loves it as much as I did. Now I get to see it through new eyes.
And we can sit and laugh our asses off together.
 
2013-07-10 02:01:48 AM

tuna fingers: I got in an argument here on the main page, or perhaps tfd after someone wrote "sike!"Most people agreed with the sike guy. You have validated me subby!


Only an idiot would write "sike" seeing as the word refers to "psyching somone out" i.e. confusing them. It's all about mentality.
 
2013-07-10 02:06:00 AM
I never found him that funny, maybe it's a generation thing. Plus his recent movies would be hard to make up for. Seriously Eddie, just stop it now.
Looks like he bought a nice younger white woman though. So he's go that going for him.
 
2013-07-10 02:06:00 AM

OscarTamerz: I don't recall the ice cream bit but I'm constantly reminded how his uncle shaved a Big Foot and married it and how all his cousins could stick their faces in the water and come up with fish in their mouths.


[www.fireandreamitchell.com image 264x300]

OOGA BOOGA


EDDIE!  YOU TREAT ME LIKE ANIMAL!
 
2013-07-10 02:11:01 AM

HairBolus: fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!

I've lived in neighborhoods where the people are too poor to afford air conditioning but all the houses have front porches. When the evenings are too hot everybody starts hanging out on their porches and drinking beer. If it gets even hotter they still stay on the porches because it is too hot to go inside (until everybody is good and drunk maybe at 4 am).

There weren't any murders near me but the noise levels increased to a level that I wouldn't have been surprised if some of the loud arguments turned into fights.


Is there a particular reason why some of those words are bolded?
 
2013-07-10 02:28:25 AM

tentaculistic: fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!

After a week without air conditioning, the inside of my house was 90 degrees.  I believe this statistic - even if you just totally made it up - because dear lord in heaven, I was not happy with life.  Dogs even less so.


92 Degrees
 
2013-07-10 02:28:31 AM
And then he said 'goony goo goo!'  Then he had a G.I. Joe up his ass!  'Hey, hey, I'm Mr. T!  I'll rip your cock off with my ass!'
 
2013-07-10 03:16:14 AM
Am I a freak for thinking that Eddie's Grandma's "welfare burger" sounded a lot tastier than the McDonald's burgers that other kids had?
 
2013-07-10 03:16:42 AM

Insult Comic Bishounen: And then he said 'goony goo goo!'  Then he had a G.I. Joe up his ass!  'Hey, hey, I'm Mr. T!  I'll rip your cock off with my ass!'


Hey NORTON!  I been watchin' you, Norton. And I know that you know that I know that you know that I know that you know that you wanna fark me up the ass!  So I'm gonna bend over, and when I do..... Staaaaaaaaaaaaaart farkin'!"

"Way to go there Ralphie boy!"
 
2013-07-10 03:32:14 AM

Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.


Is that product horrible racist, or am I horribly racist for thinking that?

/racialism... how does it work!?
 
2013-07-10 03:34:19 AM

HairBolus: fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!

I've lived in neighborhoods where the people are too poor to afford air conditioning but all the houses have front porches. When the evenings are too hot everybody starts hanging out on their porches and drinking beer. If it gets even hotter they still stay on the porches because it is too hot to go inside (until everybody is good and drunk maybe at 4 am).

There weren't any murders near me but the noise levels increased to a level that I wouldn't have been surprised if some of the loud arguments turned into fights.


So is it the poverty, the porches, the heat, the hanging out or the...beer that causes the murders. HMMMM??
 
2013-07-10 03:59:43 AM

fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!


Are you talking about the Ray Bradbury story? I can't remember the title, but it was good. It also cemented 92 degrees as the Temperature Of Doom for my young self, so even now when I see it pop up on a weather report, I feel a little uneasy.
 
2013-07-10 04:45:18 AM
www.eurocrime.co.uk
 
2013-07-10 05:53:21 AM

Palooka_Joe: [www.eonline.com image 560x415]


sorry, this one's better.

i1207.photobucket.com
 
2013-07-10 06:07:39 AM
This should be a Headline of the Year candidate.
 
2013-07-10 06:08:42 AM
www.larsonsworld.com
 
2013-07-10 06:17:52 AM

fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!


I forget the statistic on how many are killed with a longshoreman's hook.  It's almost as if, when the temperature hits 92 degrees people go Shopping for Death.
 
2013-07-10 06:47:07 AM
Aunt Bunny approves
 
2013-07-10 06:53:27 AM

Alonjar: Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.

Is that product horrible racist, or am I horribly racist for thinking that?

/racialism... how does it work!?


What is it with Yankees thinking watermelon = racist? Don't you farkers eat watermelon in the summer? And fried chicken?! Who doesn't love fried chicken? Fried chicken unites us; it doesn't divide us.
 
2013-07-10 07:04:44 AM
It's just natures way of ensuring that we reach some sort of equilibrium before destoying the Earth with global warming. The more people there are, the more green house gasses and the hotter it gets. The hotter it gets the more people murder each other and reduce the population and green house gasses.
 
2013-07-10 07:05:01 AM
There is no AC in my car. I'm one traffic incident away.
 
2013-07-10 07:14:08 AM

RenownedCurator: fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!

Are you talking about the Ray Bradbury story? I can't remember the title, but it was good. It also cemented 92 degrees as the Temperature Of Doom for my young self, so even now when I see it pop up on a weather report, I feel a little uneasy.


It's a sample used at the beginning of an 80s song. But yes, from a Bradbury line.
 
2013-07-10 07:28:33 AM
I alwasy thought Chunky Monkey sounded racist, because well, the word monkey has become racist.
 
2013-07-10 07:42:12 AM

wildcardjack: The correlating factor is the weather.

Someone said "The only thing that reduces the murder rate is snowstorms."


Yep. Crime is very fair weather. Cold and icy? Forget it.
 
2013-07-10 07:47:53 AM
 
2013-07-10 07:48:49 AM
That dog shiat in my house one more time and you don't clean up after it, I throw your ass out. I don't care you're only seven. You'll be a seven year old, walking the dog, no house motherfarker.
 
2013-07-10 07:53:36 AM

PedanticSimpleton: Here the ghetto ass ice cream truck
It be nearby
It's comin
I hear that mofrkka
YEAH
COME ON
UNH
GET IT
bring that mofrkka


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yQfzyz1LFGQ



This is the most wonderful thing ever. Thank you.
 
2013-07-10 07:56:07 AM

mbillips: Alonjar: Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.

Is that product horrible racist, or am I horribly racist for thinking that?

/racialism... how does it work!?

What is it with Yankees thinking watermelon = racist? Don't you farkers eat watermelon in the summer? And fried chicken?! Who doesn't love fried chicken? Fried chicken unites us; it doesn't divide us.


New Englander here, and we also enjoy watermelon in the summer, and fried chicken year round.

I'm pretty sure that most of us agree with you about the savage uniting force of delicious food. Most of that pearl clutching comes from Cambridge pussies(and their wannabes), near as I can tell
 
2013-07-10 08:00:02 AM
+1 for subby. I watched and rewatched that VHS so many damn times. We counted the f-bombs once, and I think it was 252?

"... and get ya fava a toased almond bar, and BRING BACK MY CHANGE!"
"And the ice cream man be sayin 'watch how fast I make these motherfarkers run'  VROOOOMMM"


My favorite was the drunk dad summer BBQ bit. "Aunt Bunny's falling down the steps again!!" "So take your motherfarking bigfoot wife, those bigfoot kids of yours, get back in your gooniegoogoomobile and get the fark out my house!"


White people bits were funny too. Walk in the new house and the ghost says <whispering> "GET OUT!!!!> "I would TIP the fark out the door."

So, what the fark was TFA about?
 
2013-07-10 08:01:16 AM
See, the media can start some unnecessary trouble because of the reaction-greedy audience:
i.qkme.me
 
2013-07-10 08:11:43 AM

tuna fingers: I got in an argument here on the main page, or perhaps tfd after someone wrote "sike!"Most people agreed with the sike guy. You have validated me subby!


Those people were all morons... It must've been TFD!
 
2013-07-10 08:43:05 AM
mafiatoday.com


Uh hu.. don't know nuttin about that.
 
2013-07-10 08:45:50 AM

jtown: Nabb1: That's old school right there.

That can't be old school.  Because that stuff was new and fresh when I was a kid and that was only...DAMNIT!


I was listening to a show touting the hits from 30 years ago.  Got pissed when I realized it was the 80's.
 
2013-07-10 08:51:24 AM
Ya'll didn't know I was a ventriloquist.
 
2013-07-10 08:56:17 AM
Iss my house, Gus. You don't like it, get the fark out.
 
2013-07-10 08:58:03 AM

mbillips: Alonjar: Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.

Is that product horrible racist, or am I horribly racist for thinking that?

/racialism... how does it work!?

What is it with Yankees thinking watermelon = racist? Don't you farkers eat watermelon in the summer? And fried chicken?! Who doesn't love fried chicken? Fried chicken unites us; it doesn't divide us.


Because Watermelon, fried chicken and BBQ pork were food for poor people.
Poor people in the north are predominately black, hence they eat a lot of watermelon, fried chicken and BBQ pork. Making fun of poor people for eating watermelon, fried chicken and BBQ pork became a symbol of making fun of black people, because they made up the largest percent of the poor.
 
2013-07-10 09:01:41 AM
It depends which one lags the other. If the murders happen first then they fuel the ice cream sales rise and if not then the ice cream sales fuel the murder rate.

This to me makes as much sense as the climate change debate. Obviously one does not fuel the other.
 
2013-07-10 09:25:35 AM
I love me some good Bill Cosby jokes!
 
2013-07-10 09:33:59 AM

fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!


Came to say this...had to settle for shaking my tiny fist.
 
2013-07-10 09:38:14 AM

skinink: I guess the only thing I can add is that Eddie Murphy's current girlfriend is some hot Australian model, Paige Butcher. And when I Google pictures of her, it seems like she and Eddie like to go out for coffee a lot. Nice looking bush biatch he has there.

[assets.nydailynews.com image 635x489]
[blackthespian.com image 634x868]
[in2eastafrica.net image 634x707]
[thejasminebrand.com image 482x594]

/HALF!


Is that Eddie Murphy or Derrick Rose? WTF is up with all of the Adidas gear?
 
2013-07-10 10:01:53 AM

Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?


HAHAHA

IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THOSE ARE ALL THINGS BLACK PEOPLE LIKE!!1!

HAHAHAHA
 

Alonjar: [watermelon ice cream.jpg]

Is that product horrible racist,

 

No

or am I horribly racist for thinking that?

Well, that's not the only reason you're a racist, but yeah.
 
2013-07-10 10:07:30 AM
Maybe I'm missing the joke, but it is "syke" and not "psych."
 
2013-07-10 10:13:12 AM

Ctrl-Alt-Del: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

HAHAHA

IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THOSE ARE ALL THINGS BLACK PEOPLE LIKE!!1!

HAHAHAHA


I'm black?  When the hell did that happen?
 
2013-07-10 10:27:04 AM

DrBrownCow: Maybe I'm missing the joke, but it is "syke" and not "psych."


www.supermanofsteel.com
 
2013-07-10 10:40:32 AM
I loved the boomerang shoe.

do do do do do do do do do do do...
chik-chik
vwoop vwoop vwoopvwoopvwooopwwoopwoopwoooop..... AHHHHH!
WHOOPWHOOPWHOOOP..
chik-chik...
"Let's go!"
 
2013-07-10 10:46:04 AM

RobSeace: DrBrownCow: Maybe I'm missing the joke, but it is "syke" and not "psych."

[www.supermanofsteel.com image 689x352]


Huh.   I'm old enough to remember the 80s and 90s, and I never, ever remember seeing it spelled "psych."   I suppose it IS short of "I psyched you out," but the spelling of slang words often don't follow the spelling of the literal meaning.   It was always "syke" or "sike."  After googling it, it does seem that "psych" is the consensus spelling.
 
2013-07-10 10:46:34 AM

waterrockets: +1 for subby. I watched and rewatched that VHS so many damn times. We counted the f-bombs once, and I think it was 252?

"... and get ya fava a toased almond bar, and BRING BACK MY CHANGE!"
"And the ice cream man be sayin 'watch how fast I make these motherfarkers run'  VROOOOMMM"


My favorite was the drunk dad summer BBQ bit. "Aunt Bunny's falling down the steps again!!" "So take your motherfarking bigfoot wife, those bigfoot kids of yours, get back in your gooniegoogoomobile and get the fark out my house!"


White people bits were funny too. Walk in the new house and the ghost says <whispering> "GET OUT!!!!> "I would TIP the fark out the door."

So, what the fark was TFA about?


My favorite bit was about the uncle working the grill at the bbq. To this day, I can't be near a fire without saying 'NOW THAT'S A FIRE!'.
 
2013-07-10 10:55:55 AM
-when do ice cream sales go up?
-summer.
-what else happens in summer?
-it gets farkin' hot
-hurricanes 'n shiat
-no school
-ergo kids & teachers loose
-some kids have no food

/take your pick
 
2013-07-10 10:55:59 AM
I recently watched either Raw or Delirious on YouTube and it was interesting how many (presumably younger) people in the comments section were shocked at just how vulgar and homophobic his comedy used to be.
 
2013-07-10 11:05:32 AM
galadarling.com
 
2013-07-10 11:16:20 AM

DrBrownCow: Maybe I'm missing the joke, but it is "syke" and not "psych."


Is that you, rotsky?
 
2013-07-10 11:16:24 AM
I've had enough. I takes it until I can takes no more!

CORRELATION IMPLIES CAUSATION!*

*But doesn't prove it. There, fixed the web for you.
 
2013-07-10 11:26:51 AM

DrBrownCow: Huh. I'm old enough to remember the 80s and 90s, and I never, ever remember seeing it spelled "psych." I suppose it IS short of "I psyched you out," but the spelling of slang words often don't follow the spelling of the literal meaning. It was always "syke" or "sike." After googling it, it does seem that "psych" is the consensus spelling.


It's one of those mostly spoken words/phrases, which leads to lots of people having no idea how to spell it, especially if they don't fully understand where it comes from... Kids just learn to say it as an expletive, and don't really associate it with "psychological", so if they ever have to write it, they just go for the phonetic spelling... But, that doesn't make them any more correct than all the people who misspell "could've" and "should've" as "could of" and "should of", since that's how they hear it and don't fully understand the meaning of the words they're using...
 
2013-07-10 11:44:10 AM
stevetherobot:

My favorite bit was about the uncle working the grill at the bbq. To this day, I can't be near a fire without saying 'NOW THAT'S A FIRE!'.

I say that as well whenever I light my charcoal grill.

"Eddie why you put your d!ck in the sink?"
 
2013-07-10 12:14:40 PM
Kill my landlord
Kill my landlord
 
2013-07-10 12:33:55 PM
now that's a FIRE!
 
2013-07-10 01:11:26 PM
It could be that something in ice cream makes people want to murder. Unlikely, but possible.

It could be something about the act of murder that makes people crave ice cream. Can't say that's impossible either.

It could be that both of these are true, which would mean we are on the very brink of an epic dairy/death-spiral!

And it could be just another dumb coincidence, like so many others.

But... my money's on the goddamn weather.
 
2013-07-10 01:49:06 PM

DrBrownCow: RobSeace: DrBrownCow: Maybe I'm missing the joke, but it is "syke" and not "psych."

[www.supermanofsteel.com image 689x352]

Huh.   I'm old enough to remember the 80s and 90s, and I never, ever remember seeing it spelled "psych."   I suppose it IS short of "I psyched you out," but the spelling of slang words often don't follow the spelling of the literal meaning.   It was always "syke" or "sike."  After googling it, it does seem that "psych" is the consensus spelling.


i.imgur.com

/subbs
 
2013-07-10 02:17:50 PM

Sofa King Smart: now that's a FIRE!


Roll Charlie around on the ground... He'll be alright.
 
2013-07-10 02:28:48 PM

brantgoose: I've had enough. I takes it until I can takes no more!

CORRELATION IMPLIES CAUSATION!*

*But doesn't prove it. There, fixed the web for you.


I once made this same claim also, until someone reminded me that "imply" also has a technical definition in philosophy/logic.  Now I use the word "suggests" instead.  But you're right, it is annoying when people hypercorrect and immediately dismiss any and all relation between the two.
 
2013-07-10 04:02:31 PM

OscarTamerz: I don't recall the ice cream bit but I'm constantly reminded how his uncle shaved a Big Foot and married it and how all his cousins could stick their faces in the water and come up with fish in their mouths.


[www.fireandreamitchell.com image 264x300]

OOGA BOOGA


Best comedy of all time.  I literally wore out a VHS tape all those years ago.
 
2013-07-10 04:44:14 PM
Hmm.
(DRTFA)
It's hot out.
People buy icecream when it's hot out.
People get off their asses and go outside when it's hot out.
It's not to cold to go out.
People note more people are out.
More people = more potential victims.
More potential victims = more victims.
Also, It rains more in the summer than in the winter.
 
2013-07-10 08:20:01 PM
Subby's wife is bigfoot...
 
2013-07-10 09:23:54 PM

DrBrownCow: Maybe I'm missing the joke, but it is "syke" and not "psych."



Notsureifserious
 
2013-07-10 11:52:46 PM

waterrockets: +1 for subby. I watched and rewatched that VHS so many damn times. We counted the f-bombs once, and I think it was 252?

"... and get ya fava a toased almond bar, and BRING BACK MY CHANGE!"
"And the ice cream man be sayin 'watch how fast I make these motherfarkers run'  VROOOOMMM"


My favorite was the drunk dad summer BBQ bit. "Aunt Bunny's falling down the steps again!!" "So take your motherfarking bigfoot wife, those bigfoot kids of yours, get back in your gooniegoogoomobile and get the fark out my house!"


White people bits were funny too. Walk in the new house and the ghost says <whispering> "GET OUT!!!!> "I would TIP the fark out the door."

So, what the fark was TFA about?


And if my wife don't like it, she can get the fark out too.

*whoosh*

Missed me biatch.
 
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