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(Slate)   When ice cream sales go up, so does the murder rate. That's 'cause I got some ice cream. And you ain't got none. Because you on welfare and can't afford it. And your father is an alcoholic. You want to eat some? Want a lick? PSYCH   (slate.com) divider line 146
    More: Interesting, murder rate, Times-Picayune  
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4793 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jul 2013 at 12:05 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



146 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-07-10 12:38:55 AM
Thank you subby! I was so down and now I'm laughing my ass off enjoying classic Eddie.
 
2013-07-10 12:39:37 AM

MountainClimber: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 455x280]


There were times I came pretty close to murdering my friends over Twisted Metal 2.

/Mr. Grimm for the win!
 
2013-07-10 12:43:29 AM
Am I the only one who thought of the ice cream truck missions from  GTA III?  Why are you chasing me Mr. police man, I'm just trying to sell some dru^H^H^H ice cream!

/at least till you dropped the mission and just went on a rampage for the fun of it
//in that ice cream truck
 
2013-07-10 12:43:34 AM
I HERD THAT shiat MAN!

THAT shiat WADDN'T FUNNY!

I SUPPOSE AT THE END OF YOUR SKIT STEVIE CRASH INTO A TREE RIGHT?

HA HA VERY FUNNY MUTHAfarkER!

YO MOMMA GOT A WOODEN LEG WITH A KICKSTAND, MUTHAfarkER
 
2013-07-10 12:47:02 AM
Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?
 
2013-07-10 12:51:39 AM

MountainClimber: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 455x280]


I miss that game.
 
2013-07-10 12:57:56 AM
Had to cut my own switch.
 
2013-07-10 12:58:12 AM
Wu-Tang in the cut, for real successful and attractive African-Americanz what?
It's the after party and biatches want to fark
Ice cold biatches melt down when my clutch
and want they titties sucked, ice cream
 
2013-07-10 01:00:09 AM
Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees than at any other temperature? At lower temperatures, people are easy-going. Higher, it's too hot to move. But just at 92, people get irritable.


Drink the water with jagged glass
Eat the cactus with bleeding mouth
Not 91 or 93 but 92 Fahrenheit degrees
 
2013-07-10 01:02:55 AM
'Cause you are on the welfare, you on the welfare. And you daddy's an alcoholic!
 
2013-07-10 01:05:52 AM

Somacandra: I HERD THAT shiat MAN!

THAT shiat WADDN'T FUNNY!

I SUPPOSE AT THE END OF YOUR SKIT STEVIE CRASH INTO A TREE RIGHT?

HA HA VERY FUNNY MUTHAfarkER!

YO MOMMA GOT A WOODEN LEG WITH A KICKSTAND, MUTHAfarkER


YO MOMMA GOT A MOUTH ON THE BACK OF HER NECK WHEN SHE EAT SHE LOOK LIKE DIS
 
2013-07-10 01:09:37 AM

Psycoholic_Slag: Mangoose: Classic Eddie Murphy.

But for some reason it put the Cosby "Dad is great. He gave us chocolate cake" bit in my head.

Grew up listening to this:

[cdn.7static.com image 350x350]

I remember the part when he was going to get his tonsils removed and all he cared about was all the ice cream you can eat!

Classic album.


Listen!  I didn't put the damn bullet in the furnace!  And stop talkin' about my mother!
 
2013-07-10 01:10:02 AM

Girion47: MFAWG: [images.starpulse.com image 400x600]

goony goo goo


thpppppthttpptptppttptptt OH LORD HELP ME thpppptthtpthhtpth OH LORD JESUStthhrhrprprhtpprh OH LORD I'M HALFWAY DOWN NOW thhhtpptphtppthhtp...
 
2013-07-10 01:14:05 AM

Z-clipped: thpppppthttpptptppttptptt OH LORD HELP ME thpppptthtpthhtpth OH LORD JESUStthhrhrprprhtpprh OH LORD I'M HALFWAY DOWN NOW thhhtpptphtppthhtp...


MY SHOE!
 
2013-07-10 01:20:19 AM
AND BRING ME BACK MY CHANGE!
 
2013-07-10 01:25:02 AM
I'm gonna let ya'll finish...but HEADLINE OF THE YEAR
 
2013-07-10 01:25:03 AM

Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?


Fried chicken flavored ice cream? You are some kind of sick, you know that?
 
2013-07-10 01:27:39 AM
Statistics 101.  Correlation is not causation.
 
2013-07-10 01:27:42 AM
Correlation does not imply causation.
 
2013-07-10 01:30:42 AM
FTA: Saying that warm weather causes crime is just as simplistic as saying ice cream causes crime.

Jesus firking Christ. Is that so?

Then, 2 sentences later:

But the correlation between temperature levels and violent crime rates is worth rememberingthe next time that....

Yep. Better start remembering things that are comparable to "ice cream causes crime."
 
2013-07-10 01:31:22 AM

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: Correlation does not imply causation.


For some definitions of "imply".
 
2013-07-10 01:31:41 AM

cgremlin: Eddie's ice cream bit was pretty damned funny, but his story about his brother in the bathtub with G.I Joe literally had me in tears.


♫♪ Here comes the big brown sharkie..♪ ♫
 
2013-07-10 01:32:03 AM
www.eonline.com
 
2013-07-10 01:33:10 AM
Jesus Christo!  Wasn't "Delirious" from 1983?  30 farking years ago?  That means the subby and anyone who remembers this film is really farking old...as me.
 
2013-07-10 01:35:42 AM

Girion47: MFAWG: [images.starpulse.com image 400x600]

goony goo goo


What the fark does "goony goo goo" mean, Gus????
 
2013-07-10 01:38:24 AM

Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?


www.bakedbyrachel.com

I'm not sure about the other two.
 
2013-07-10 01:39:23 AM
You married a Bigfoot, Gus!
 
2013-07-10 01:43:06 AM
Either the belt, or the shoe...
The beatings will now commence, kids...if...you...don't...get...in...bed...right...this...second!
 
2013-07-10 01:47:00 AM

fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!


I've lived in neighborhoods where the people are too poor to afford air conditioning but all the houses have front porches. When the evenings are too hot everybody starts hanging out on their porches and drinking beer. If it gets even hotter they still stay on the porches because it is too hot to go inside (until everybody is good and drunk maybe at 4 am).

There weren't any murders near me but the noise levels increased to a level that I wouldn't have been surprised if some of the loud arguments turned into fights.
 
2013-07-10 01:53:26 AM

Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.


OMG, that looks awesome.  Where can I get one???
 
2013-07-10 01:55:18 AM

jtown: Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.

OMG, that looks awesome.  Where can I get one???


Well, Friedly's for one, if they still exist as a restaurant. But I usually see them in my local supermarkets during the summer.

/yes it is awesome.
 
2013-07-10 02:00:24 AM

Angusmeats: Jesus Christo!  Wasn't "Delirious" from 1983?  30 farking years ago?  That means the subby and anyone who remembers this film is really farking old...as me.


Yeah, we old.
On the up side, I got my son, who is 16, singing:
*I got Micdonalls,
*dad is great-gives us the chocolate cake
...and every time the ice cream truck comes by- he's quoting subby's headline. He loves it as much as I did. Now I get to see it through new eyes.
And we can sit and laugh our asses off together.
 
2013-07-10 02:01:48 AM

tuna fingers: I got in an argument here on the main page, or perhaps tfd after someone wrote "sike!"Most people agreed with the sike guy. You have validated me subby!


Only an idiot would write "sike" seeing as the word refers to "psyching somone out" i.e. confusing them. It's all about mentality.
 
2013-07-10 02:06:00 AM
I never found him that funny, maybe it's a generation thing. Plus his recent movies would be hard to make up for. Seriously Eddie, just stop it now.
Looks like he bought a nice younger white woman though. So he's go that going for him.
 
2013-07-10 02:06:00 AM

OscarTamerz: I don't recall the ice cream bit but I'm constantly reminded how his uncle shaved a Big Foot and married it and how all his cousins could stick their faces in the water and come up with fish in their mouths.


[www.fireandreamitchell.com image 264x300]

OOGA BOOGA


EDDIE!  YOU TREAT ME LIKE ANIMAL!
 
2013-07-10 02:11:01 AM

HairBolus: fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!

I've lived in neighborhoods where the people are too poor to afford air conditioning but all the houses have front porches. When the evenings are too hot everybody starts hanging out on their porches and drinking beer. If it gets even hotter they still stay on the porches because it is too hot to go inside (until everybody is good and drunk maybe at 4 am).

There weren't any murders near me but the noise levels increased to a level that I wouldn't have been surprised if some of the loud arguments turned into fights.


Is there a particular reason why some of those words are bolded?
 
2013-07-10 02:28:25 AM

tentaculistic: fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!

After a week without air conditioning, the inside of my house was 90 degrees.  I believe this statistic - even if you just totally made it up - because dear lord in heaven, I was not happy with life.  Dogs even less so.


92 Degrees
 
2013-07-10 02:28:31 AM
And then he said 'goony goo goo!'  Then he had a G.I. Joe up his ass!  'Hey, hey, I'm Mr. T!  I'll rip your cock off with my ass!'
 
2013-07-10 03:16:14 AM
Am I a freak for thinking that Eddie's Grandma's "welfare burger" sounded a lot tastier than the McDonald's burgers that other kids had?
 
2013-07-10 03:16:42 AM

Insult Comic Bishounen: And then he said 'goony goo goo!'  Then he had a G.I. Joe up his ass!  'Hey, hey, I'm Mr. T!  I'll rip your cock off with my ass!'


Hey NORTON!  I been watchin' you, Norton. And I know that you know that I know that you know that I know that you know that you wanna fark me up the ass!  So I'm gonna bend over, and when I do..... Staaaaaaaaaaaaaart farkin'!"

"Way to go there Ralphie boy!"
 
2013-07-10 03:32:14 AM

Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.


Is that product horrible racist, or am I horribly racist for thinking that?

/racialism... how does it work!?
 
2013-07-10 03:34:19 AM

HairBolus: fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!

I've lived in neighborhoods where the people are too poor to afford air conditioning but all the houses have front porches. When the evenings are too hot everybody starts hanging out on their porches and drinking beer. If it gets even hotter they still stay on the porches because it is too hot to go inside (until everybody is good and drunk maybe at 4 am).

There weren't any murders near me but the noise levels increased to a level that I wouldn't have been surprised if some of the loud arguments turned into fights.


So is it the poverty, the porches, the heat, the hanging out or the...beer that causes the murders. HMMMM??
 
2013-07-10 03:59:43 AM

fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!


Are you talking about the Ray Bradbury story? I can't remember the title, but it was good. It also cemented 92 degrees as the Temperature Of Doom for my young self, so even now when I see it pop up on a weather report, I feel a little uneasy.
 
2013-07-10 04:45:18 AM
www.eurocrime.co.uk
 
2013-07-10 05:53:21 AM

Palooka_Joe: [www.eonline.com image 560x415]


sorry, this one's better.

i1207.photobucket.com
 
2013-07-10 06:07:39 AM
This should be a Headline of the Year candidate.
 
2013-07-10 06:08:42 AM
www.larsonsworld.com
 
2013-07-10 06:17:52 AM

fusillade762: Did you know that more murders are committed at 92 degrees Fahrenheit than any other temperature? I read an article once. At lower temperatures, people are easy-going, over 92, it's too hot to move, but just 92, people get IRRITABLE!


I forget the statistic on how many are killed with a longshoreman's hook.  It's almost as if, when the temperature hits 92 degrees people go Shopping for Death.
 
2013-07-10 06:47:07 AM
Aunt Bunny approves
 
2013-07-10 06:53:27 AM

Alonjar: Yes this is dog: Smeggy Smurf: Do they even sell watermelon, fried chicken or grape soda flavored ice cream?

[www.bakedbyrachel.com image 500x375]

I'm not sure about the other two.

Is that product horrible racist, or am I horribly racist for thinking that?

/racialism... how does it work!?


What is it with Yankees thinking watermelon = racist? Don't you farkers eat watermelon in the summer? And fried chicken?! Who doesn't love fried chicken? Fried chicken unites us; it doesn't divide us.
 
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