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(KOB4)   Okay...the new 'Lone Ranger' movie couldn't have been THAT bad   (kob.com) divider line 149
    More: Sick, Lone Ranger, genitals  
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32950 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Jul 2013 at 9:50 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



149 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2013-07-08 12:12:04 PM
In terms of high, I find there's not a vas deferens between shooting up in your eyeball or nut sack.
 
2013-07-08 12:14:05 PM
I really should not have read this whole thread.

I'm going to need therapy.
 
2013-07-08 12:14:45 PM
satanic_Hamster: I'll be honest; when seeing the Dungeons and Dragons movie with friends at the cheap theater, I strong considered killing myself.


I'll be honest, when seeing Armageddon movie with friends at the theater, I strongly considered killing myself AND my friends for suggesting such a farking stupid film to see.
 
2013-07-08 12:15:29 PM

VaportrailFilms: I really should not have read this whole thread.

I'm going to need therapy.


Yep.  Reading this thread hungover is not helping much.
 
2013-07-08 12:21:11 PM

ColSanders: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 292x216]


LMAO! That was funny.
 
2013-07-08 12:21:22 PM
murderpedia.org
 
2013-07-08 12:23:37 PM

Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.


I'm female. Do you know what a PA is?

Ok, to be completely honest, it's my fiance.
 
2013-07-08 12:25:12 PM
I don't have a dick to shoot heroin into :(


/just got a *really* good idea...
 
2013-07-08 12:30:06 PM
Was he tripping balls when he was arrested?
 
2013-07-08 12:30:58 PM
He wanted to emulate his favorite movie hero, but instead of sticking his dick into the heroine, he stuck heroin into his dick.
 
2013-07-08 12:35:21 PM

megarian: I don't have a dick to shoot heroin into :(


/just got a *really* good idea...


Yeeaaahhhh, I'm gonna have to go and disagree with you there. So, if you could go ahead and not have that idea anymore, that would be greeeaaat.
 
2013-07-08 12:36:46 PM

berylman: Don't listen to subby, the Lone Ranger was surprisingly good. It had the potential to really suck but was solid all-around.


Yeah, the critics HATED it but every complaint seemed to boil down to, "bleh, Johnny Depp too POPULAR," and "It wasn't like the version of the Lone Ranger I watched/listened to as a kid, because that matters to anyone."
 
2013-07-08 12:41:13 PM

r1niceboy: megarian: I don't have a dick to shoot heroin into :(


/just got a *really* good idea...

Yeeaaahhhh, I'm gonna have to go and disagree with you there. So, if you could go ahead and not have that idea anymore, that would be greeeaaat.


*shrug*

It was awesome.
 
2013-07-08 12:43:35 PM

Lady J: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

I'm female. Do you know what a PA is?

Ok, to be completely honest, it's my fiance.


Which one?
 
2013-07-08 12:47:05 PM
Phagocytosis gets me high every time.
 
2013-07-08 12:48:08 PM

Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.


Can you really "know" your ass?
 
2013-07-08 12:50:47 PM

megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?


I believe with the right attachment for an Hitachi Magic Wand, you can "know" anything.
 
2013-07-08 12:50:50 PM

megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?


Yes.
 
2013-07-08 12:51:21 PM

megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?


Oh boy! A philosophical debate thread!
 
2013-07-08 12:53:32 PM

Jesus Farking Christ: megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?

I believe with the right attachment for an Hitachi Magic Wand, you can "know" anything.


Well I know what I'm asking Santa for this Christmas.
 
2013-07-08 12:54:47 PM

SirEattonHogg: satanic_Hamster: I'll be honest; when seeing the Dungeons and Dragons movie with friends at the cheap theater, I strong considered killing myself.


I'll be honest, when seeing Armageddon movie with friends at the theater, I strongly considered killing myself AND my friends for suggesting such a farking stupid film to see.



But you didn't want to close your eyes.

You didn't want to miss a thing.

Right?
 
2013-07-08 12:57:18 PM
Needles in the dick? No thank you.
I can't even imagine a scenario in which this might seem like a good time.
 
2013-07-08 12:58:53 PM

megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?

I believe with the right attachment for an Hitachi Magic Wand, you can "know" anything.

Well I know what I'm asking Santa for this Christmas.


Um, not Christ?  I'm kind of offended.
 
2013-07-08 01:01:35 PM

Lars The Canadian Viking: I injected K while watching Knocked Up in a theater. Good times.


How you get like that?
 
2013-07-08 01:02:30 PM

Jesus Farking Christ: megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?

I believe with the right attachment for an Hitachi Magic Wand, you can "know" anything.

Well I know what I'm asking Santa for this Christmas.

Um, not Christ?  I'm kind of offended.


Holy fark. Jesus grants wishes and breaks into my house via chimney, leaves presents, and eats my cookies? I'm going to pray to you SO HARD.

Today is pretty much the best day ever.
 
2013-07-08 01:03:36 PM
That's known as junk on your junk.
 
2013-07-08 01:06:45 PM

megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?

I believe with the right attachment for an Hitachi Magic Wand, you can "know" anything.

Well I know what I'm asking Santa for this Christmas.

Um, not Christ?  I'm kind of offended.

Holy fark. Jesus grants wishes and breaks into my house via chimney, leaves presents, and eats my cookies? I'm going to pray to you SO HARD.

Today is pretty much the best day ever.


Heh heh.
 
2013-07-08 01:15:21 PM

IdBeCrazyIf: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

I have a friend who has one, he now permanently has to sit down to take a leak or he's forced to plug the holes using his fingers and then thoroughly wash his hands from the dribble. I asked him once what its like when he cums and he said it does the same thing, jets out in three directions, he likes it cause I guess he can paint his wife's face better that way.

And now you cannot unknow that


I was all ready to call bullshiat on this, but apparently that's common.  What. The. Fark.  Who would do that to themselves?
 
2013-07-08 01:23:59 PM

Cheron: So last Saturday I was watching the new Lone Ranger movie when I took a cardiac needle and pushed it into my testicles. In and out, in and out. I hate when that happens.

[s9.postimg.org image 259x194]


I know what you mean.
 
2013-07-08 01:25:07 PM

cameroncrazy1984: I think I'm going to go home and go to bed. I've learned way too much today.


Come back tomorrow fresh and rested.

Then google 'scrotal inflation'.
 
2013-07-08 01:30:33 PM

megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?


Only from your elbow.
 
2013-07-08 01:31:33 PM

durbnpoisn: I really don't know what's going on in this thread.  The headline is about the Lone Ranger but the article is about some dude injecting drugs through his genitals.  Can someone please make the connection for me?

In the meantime, I cannot even watch the trailers for that film.  There is no farking way I'm gonna spend $75 bucks to go to the theater and watch it.


$75?

Where are you posting from, two years from now?
 
2013-07-08 01:32:59 PM

Satanic_Hamster: I'll be honest; when seeing the Dungeons and Dragons movie with friends at the cheap theater, I strong considered killing myself.


I would have been game for a murder/suicide pact with you. Although I'd have demanded to be the first to go.
 
2013-07-08 01:36:49 PM

VaportrailFilms: I really should not have read this whole thread.

I'm going to need therapy.


You're going to needle therapy? I'll be slumped in the corner, passed out and covered in cold sweat and vomit.
 
2013-07-08 01:47:01 PM

megarian: I don't have a dick to shoot heroin into :(


/just got a *really* good idea...


I used to wonder who ELO's song was about. Now I know.

parentinghelpme.comAaaaaaaa
 
2013-07-08 01:52:23 PM
Oh yeah, I've seen that series. TeSTICKular #3 was the acme of the genre. After that it got a little weird when they started getting into powdered sugar and flavor injectors. Nobody watches that stuff anymore. Now, everybody is into double anabolic.
 
2013-07-08 02:25:38 PM

technofiend: megarian: I don't have a dick to shoot heroin into :(


/just got a *really* good idea...

I used to wonder who ELO's song was about. Now I know.

Aaaaaaaa


Alright, that was pretty funny :)
 
2013-07-08 02:57:41 PM

IdBeCrazyIf: And now you cannot unknow that


I, for one, am better for the knowing of this.
 
2013-07-08 03:20:55 PM
Stay classy Albuquerque!
 
2013-07-08 03:28:05 PM

megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?


You mean in a Biblical sense?
 
2013-07-08 03:46:43 PM

Abner Doon: IdBeCrazyIf: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

I have a friend who has one, he now permanently has to sit down to take a leak or he's forced to plug the holes using his fingers and then thoroughly wash his hands from the dribble. I asked him once what its like when he cums and he said it does the same thing, jets out in three directions, he likes it cause I guess he can paint his wife's face better that way.

And now you cannot unknow that

I was all ready to call bullshiat on this, but apparently that's common.  What. The. Fark.  Who would do that to themselves?


a PA? I have asked Lord J and he says the benefits outweigh the negatives
 
2013-07-08 04:07:54 PM

AngryJailhouseFistfark: megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?

You mean in a Biblical sense?


Well, now I do.
 
2013-07-08 04:52:49 PM

megarian: Alright, that was pretty funny :)


Thank you, I forgot to specifically mention "Evil Woman", so I'm glad you knew. I have you fark favorited with the cryptic note "bermuda" and no idea why.  Perhaps some day you'll just see my name tagged "Evil Woman" and wonder why.
 
2013-07-08 04:53:52 PM
What do you think folks did in the days before the internet at the movies?
 
2013-07-08 04:56:40 PM

technofiend: megarian: Alright, that was pretty funny :)

Thank you, I forgot to specifically mention "Evil Woman", so I'm glad you knew. I have you fark favorited with the cryptic note "bermuda" and no idea why.  Perhaps some day you'll just see my name tagged "Evil Woman" and wonder why.


Deal!
 
2013-07-08 05:07:53 PM
2.bp.blogspot.com

ABQ? Was spooge's woman with him?
 
2013-07-08 08:14:55 PM

Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

I'm female. Do you know what a PA is?

Ok, to be completely honest, it's my fiance.

Which one?


i.somethingawful.com
Flint?
 
2013-07-09 03:53:33 AM

megarian: Jesus Farking Christ: Lady J: Beeblebrox: Lady J: baltimoreblonde: Prank Call of Cthulhu: So when he pees, does it look like a lawn sprinker, with whiz spraying out of all those extra holes in his dong?

OK, I laughed WAY too loudly at that one. Can't get the mental image out of my mind.

/rotating lawn sprinkler?

if you have a Prince Albert piercing it goes everywhere, at unpredictable tangents

How, and why, would you know this?

I know someone who has one

"Know" my ass.

Can you really "know" your ass?


Maybe he means "know my ass" in the Biblical sense?
 
2013-07-09 03:56:50 AM

Grammatik Polizei: Stay classy Albuquerque!


It may not be classy, but at least Albuquerque  is stilla magical, far-away place where the sun is always shining and the air smells like warm root beer, and the towels are oh-so-fluffy.
 
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