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(News.com.au)   No. Hell no. Hell FARKing no   (news.com.au) divider line 99
    More: Stupid, Hell FARKing, Miley Cyrus, Obama, White House, Star-Spangled Banners, U.S. Mint, traditional songs  
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14903 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 08 Jul 2013 at 7:53 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



99 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-07-08 07:50:21 AM
No hyperbole.  Not even saying this to mean it the way it means in Boston:   That's wicked retarded. Literally, people who think this have had their intelligence retarded for some reason.

That being said, you may now commence with an  Idiocracy thread.
 
2013-07-08 07:52:09 AM
 
2013-07-08 07:59:14 AM
i1079.photobucket.com
Because 'die' should be the last word in every National Anthem...
 
2013-07-08 08:00:40 AM
This only quickens the inevitable split again, as the Confederate states will demand "Freebird" be their new national anthem.
 
2013-07-08 08:04:15 AM
www.thatpamchick.com
 
2013-07-08 08:06:22 AM

EyeballKid: This only quickens the inevitable split again, as the Confederate states will demand "Freebird" be their new national anthem.


I think it should be Guile's Theme from Street Fighter.
 
2013-07-08 08:10:50 AM
That was one of the most retarded songs I've ever heard. It was just inane drivel and namedropping Jay-Z and Britney as some kind of rolemodels...
 
2013-07-08 08:11:05 AM
Nothing that will allow "fledgling singers" to 'sing the scales' mid-song would be nice
 
2013-07-08 08:11:32 AM
I want to see this happen more than anything.
 
2013-07-08 08:12:41 AM
The only reasonable choice is Ass & Titties.
 
2013-07-08 08:13:40 AM
how has this petition website remained active this long? all we ever see are stupid things like petitioning for texas secession and make this pop hit our national anthem.

"OMFG!!1!1!!!!111!!! IF WE GET 100,000 'SIGNATURES' THE WHITE HOUSE MUST LISTEN TO OUR DEMANDS AND RESPOND"

yes, wasting the time and energy of our white house staffers who are bringing home a paycheck comprised of money from our taxpaying wallets over a miley cyrus song or the not-gonna-happen tx secession. and this does not mean in any way shape or form that they must actually do anything legislatively, only that they will make some sort of statement if there are enough signatures.
 
2013-07-08 08:17:03 AM

Kristoph57: EyeballKid: This only quickens the inevitable split again, as the Confederate states will demand "Freebird" be their new national anthem.

I think it should be Guile's Theme from Street Fighter.


Even better, I suggest this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xm4akUgsXsY
 
2013-07-08 08:19:07 AM
I love that song.

Of course, the idea of making it the national anthem is retarded.

But, that is a fun song.
 
2013-07-08 08:25:19 AM
Gotta admit this is a genius marketing ploy.
 
2013-07-08 08:28:39 AM

bungle_jr: how has this petition website remained active this long? all we ever see are stupid things like petitioning for texas secession and make this pop hit our national anthem.

"OMFG!!1!1!!!!111!!! IF WE GET 100,000 'SIGNATURES' THE WHITE HOUSE MUST LISTEN TO OUR DEMANDS AND RESPOND"

yes, wasting the time and energy of our white house staffers who are bringing home a paycheck comprised of money from our taxpaying wallets over a miley cyrus song or the not-gonna-happen tx secession. and this does not mean in any way shape or form that they must actually do anything legislatively, only that they will make some sort of statement if there are enough signatures.


Actually no. That's not all that it's there. In fact, it's actually a small percentage. Obviously some people like to make stupid petitions, but hey, it's their right, plus it's not as if the White House will actually listen to those, although they do give responses at least. You just hear about it because mass media prefers to report on fluffy tripe instead of actual news.

Here are some of the petitions that better represent the site:

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/balanced-approach-reformin g- postal-service

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/comprehensive-approach-wal l- street-reform

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/addressing-legalization-ma ri juana

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/addressing-freedoms-speech -a nd-religion

You can find more here:

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/responses
 
2013-07-08 08:31:07 AM

rocky_howard: bungle_jr: how has this petition website remained active this long? all we ever see are stupid things like petitioning for texas secession and make this pop hit our national anthem.

"OMFG!!1!1!!!!111!!! IF WE GET 100,000 'SIGNATURES' THE WHITE HOUSE MUST LISTEN TO OUR DEMANDS AND RESPOND"

yes, wasting the time and energy of our white house staffers who are bringing home a paycheck comprised of money from our taxpaying wallets over a miley cyrus song or the not-gonna-happen tx secession. and this does not mean in any way shape or form that they must actually do anything legislatively, only that they will make some sort of statement if there are enough signatures.

Actually no. That's not all that it's there. In fact, it's actually a small percentage. Obviously some people like to make stupid petitions, but hey, it's their right, plus it's not as if the White House will actually listen to those, although they do give responses at least. You just hear about it because mass media prefers to report on fluffy tripe instead of actual news.

Here are some of the petitions that better represent the site:

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/balanced-approach-reformin g- postal-service

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/comprehensive-approach-wal l- street-reform

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/addressing-legalization-ma ri juana

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/addressing-freedoms-speech -a nd-religion

You can find more here:

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/responses


yes, i do realize the vast majority are most likely legitimate petitions for things that really matter. however, this is fark, and it's early monday morning, therefore, my post.
 
2013-07-08 08:41:43 AM
I think a segment of the population would prefer  this (NSFW lyrics and obnoxious imagery).
 
2013-07-08 08:49:41 AM
 
mhd
2013-07-08 08:52:15 AM
Yeah, like there's a chance that a frat boy drinking song becomes a national anthem.
 
2013-07-08 08:54:53 AM
So, if this happened (which is as likely as Governor Justin Bieber, the United States adopting Swahili as the official language and me perfecting a working light saber/bat'leth combo), would Miley Cirus collect royalties every time the national anthem was played?
 
2013-07-08 08:55:05 AM
THIS HAS TO HAPPEN.

And look at the bright side. You can expect an unprecedented medal count at the Olympics. Countries would start losing on purpose just for teh lulz.
 
2013-07-08 08:56:23 AM
Oh CHRIST! Does that mean Canuckistan has to adopt a new national anthem from Nickelback - or, worse yet, The Bieb???
 
2013-07-08 08:56:50 AM

The Muthaship: I love that song.

Of course, the idea of making it the national anthem is retarded.

But, that is a fun song.


I PUT MY HANDS UP

/guilty pleasure
 
2013-07-08 08:58:24 AM
I'm guessing the song is crap.
 
2013-07-08 09:00:24 AM

mhd: Yeah, like there's a chance that a frat boy drinking song becomes a national anthem.


Fun fact:  the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song.  Not the words, just the tune.  When the national anthem was written, not very many people knew how to read, even fewer knew how to read music.  Drinking songs were popular, so hymns and the national anthem were composed to the tune of drinking songs.  That way all you had to do was teach the words and tell everyone "It is in the tune of this drinking song."
 
2013-07-08 09:02:21 AM
Stick a fork in it, America. You're done.
 
2013-07-08 09:07:15 AM

Great Janitor: So, if this happened (which is as likely as Governor Justin Bieber, the United States adopting Swahili as the official language and me perfecting a working light saber/bat'leth combo), would Miley Cirus collect royalties every time the national anthem was played?


Would Jay-Z and Britney Spears also be entitled to a cut?

(Actually, most likely the government would have to buy out the rights to the song, which it would then have to put into the public domain since it cannot claim copyright. Ergo, no royalties. Not that it's going to happen, but hey, fun mental exercise.)
 
2013-07-08 09:11:43 AM

oldfarthenry: Oh CHRIST! Does that mean Canuckistan has to adopt a new national anthem from Nickelback - or, worse yet, The Bieb???


Why not serious song by serious Canadian artist?
 
2013-07-08 09:14:47 AM

LewDux: oldfarthenry: Oh CHRIST! Does that mean Canuckistan has to adopt a new national anthem from Nickelback - or, worse yet, The Bieb???

Why not serious song by serious Canadian artist?


Canadian Railroad Trilogy is the obvious choice.
 
2013-07-08 09:15:18 AM
President Camacho approves:

bbcristian.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-07-08 09:21:12 AM
I think this is the official White House response:

images.sodahead.com
 
2013-07-08 09:36:08 AM

bungle_jr: rocky_howard: bungle_jr: how has this petition website remained active this long? all we ever see are stupid things like petitioning for texas secession and make this pop hit our national anthem.

"OMFG!!1!1!!!!111!!! IF WE GET 100,000 'SIGNATURES' THE WHITE HOUSE MUST LISTEN TO OUR DEMANDS AND RESPOND"

yes, wasting the time and energy of our white house staffers who are bringing home a paycheck comprised of money from our taxpaying wallets over a miley cyrus song or the not-gonna-happen tx secession. and this does not mean in any way shape or form that they must actually do anything legislatively, only that they will make some sort of statement if there are enough signatures.

Actually no. That's not all that it's there. In fact, it's actually a small percentage. Obviously some people like to make stupid petitions, but hey, it's their right, plus it's not as if the White House will actually listen to those, although they do give responses at least. You just hear about it because mass media prefers to report on fluffy tripe instead of actual news.

Here are some of the petitions that better represent the site:

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/balanced-approach-reformin g- postal-service

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/comprehensive-approach-wal l- street-reform

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/addressing-legalization-ma ri juana

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/addressing-freedoms-speech -a nd-religion

You can find more here:

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/responses

yes, i do realize the vast majority are most likely legitimate petitions for things that really matter. however, this is fark, and it's early monday morning, therefore, my post.


Scanning the list of open petitions shows the vast majority to be anything but.  Honor a sports team, repeal a state law, comment about some person in another country, etc.

Crowd-originated ideas means that there is always far more chaff than wheat.
 
2013-07-08 09:36:52 AM

Great Janitor: mhd: Yeah, like there's a chance that a frat boy drinking song becomes a national anthem.

Fun fact:  the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song.  Not the words, just the tune.  When the national anthem was written, not very many people knew how to read, even fewer knew how to read music.  Drinking songs were popular, so hymns and the national anthem were composed to the tune of drinking songs.  That way all you had to do was teach the words and tell everyone "It is in the tune of this drinking song."


To Anacreon in Heaven
 
2013-07-08 09:38:00 AM

RickN99: Crowd-originated ideas means that there is always far more chaff than wheat.


True, but the ones that actually get more than a handful of signatures are issues that people care about enough to promote and spread around, as opposed to "wouldn't it be funny if..."
 
2013-07-08 09:41:18 AM

Great Janitor: mhd: Yeah, like there's a chance that a frat boy drinking song becomes a national anthem.

Fun fact:  the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song.  Not the words, just the tune.  When the national anthem was written, not very many people knew how to read, even fewer knew how to read music.  Drinking songs were popular, so hymns and the national anthem were composed to the tune of drinking songs.  That way all you had to do was teach the words and tell everyone "It is in the tune of this drinking song."


And a British drinking song at that. We were dumbasses even back then. At least this Miley chick is American.
 
2013-07-08 09:43:47 AM

browntimmy: Great Janitor: mhd: Yeah, like there's a chance that a frat boy drinking song becomes a national anthem.

Fun fact:  the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song.  Not the words, just the tune.  When the national anthem was written, not very many people knew how to read, even fewer knew how to read music.  Drinking songs were popular, so hymns and the national anthem were composed to the tune of drinking songs.  That way all you had to do was teach the words and tell everyone "It is in the tune of this drinking song."

And a British drinking song at that. We were dumbasses even back then. At least this Miley chick is American.


I'm not too sure there were many American drinking songs back then.
 
2013-07-08 09:48:08 AM
This should be the national Anthem:

I was eatin' some chop suey,
With a lady in St. Louie,
When there sudden comes a knockin' at the door.
And that knocker, he says, "Honey,
Roll this rocker out some money,
Or your daddy shoots a baddie to the floor."

Anyone can sing it, it's only got one note!
 
2013-07-08 09:49:30 AM

rocky_howard: That was one of the most retarded songs I've ever heard. It was just inane drivel and namedropping Jay-Z and Britney as some kind of rolemodels...


Oh.  That song.

thecpt: The Muthaship: I love that song.

Of course, the idea of making it the national anthem is retarded.

But, that is a fun song.

I PUT MY HANDS UP

/guilty pleasure


Yeah, it's catchy.  It ain't good...but there's worse.

dennysgod: I think this is the official White House response:

[images.sodahead.com image 350x223]


I hope so.
 
2013-07-08 09:50:32 AM

browntimmy: Great Janitor: mhd: Yeah, like there's a chance that a frat boy drinking song becomes a national anthem.

Fun fact:  the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song.  Not the words, just the tune.  When the national anthem was written, not very many people knew how to read, even fewer knew how to read music.  Drinking songs were popular, so hymns and the national anthem were composed to the tune of drinking songs.  That way all you had to do was teach the words and tell everyone "It is in the tune of this drinking song."

And a British drinking song at that. We were dumbasses even back then. At least this Miley chick is American.


we were all british back then. and Mr. Keys poem was hamfisted to the melody because two drunk guards kept caterwalling the thing all night.
it wasnt even adopted as the national anthem until years and years after the revolution was over
 
2013-07-08 09:55:33 AM
Its still better than the one we have now.

There, I said it.
 
2013-07-08 09:57:22 AM

Gordon Bennett: Great Janitor: mhd: Yeah, like there's a chance that a frat boy drinking song becomes a national anthem.

Fun fact:  the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song.  Not the words, just the tune.  When the national anthem was written, not very many people knew how to read, even fewer knew how to read music.  Drinking songs were popular, so hymns and the national anthem were composed to the tune of drinking songs.  That way all you had to do was teach the words and tell everyone "It is in the tune of this drinking song."

To Anacreon in Heaven


I had honestly never thought to listen to that before.  Even the old drinking songs were written better than Nicki Minaj songs.
 
2013-07-08 09:59:13 AM
weird al yankovic did a parody of that song, they should make that the anthem instead.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-CG5w4YwOI
 
2013-07-08 10:01:05 AM
It has less then 300 signatures. This is a non issue.
 
2013-07-08 10:02:46 AM

Cerebral Knievel: browntimmy: Great Janitor: mhd: Yeah, like there's a chance that a frat boy drinking song becomes a national anthem.

Fun fact:  the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song.  Not the words, just the tune.  When the national anthem was written, not very many people knew how to read, even fewer knew how to read music.  Drinking songs were popular, so hymns and the national anthem were composed to the tune of drinking songs.  That way all you had to do was teach the words and tell everyone "It is in the tune of this drinking song."

And a British drinking song at that. We were dumbasses even back then. At least this Miley chick is American.

we were all british back then. and Mr. Keys poem was hamfisted to the melody because two drunk guards kept caterwalling the thing all night.
it wasnt even adopted as the national anthem until years and years after the revolution was over


Still, the national anthem is kind of a big deal and gives us an identity. Ours says: Instead of coming up with something original, we ripped off the country we suffered and died to separate ourselves from.
 
2013-07-08 10:06:52 AM

browntimmy: Still, the national anthem is kind of a big deal and gives us an identity. Ours says: Instead of coming up with something original, we ripped off the country we suffered and died to separate ourselves from.


That's just dumb. Should we have invented a new language as well? After all, we're all speaking the Queen's oppressive tongue....
 
2013-07-08 10:07:56 AM

Great Janitor: Fun fact: the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song. Not the words, just the tune.


That explains it - I always that a beer-fart belonged in that pause after the first line.
 
2013-07-08 10:07:58 AM

rocky_howard: Here are some of the petitions that better represent the site:

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/balanced-approach-reformin g- postal-service

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/comprehensive-approach-wal l- street-reform

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/addressing-legalization-ma ri juana

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/addressing-freedoms-speech -a nd-religion

You can find more here:

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/responses


Don't forget the one that got the White House to post Obama's "secret" recipe for Honey Ale.

Also, are Farkers really that desperate for Green Lights that they'll scan through the White House petition site looking for something to submit?  Pathetic.
 
2013-07-08 10:11:54 AM

oldfarthenry: Great Janitor: Fun fact: the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song. Not the words, just the tune.

That explains it - I always that a beer-fart belonged in that pause after the first line.


That also explains why they play it before every baseball game.
 
2013-07-08 10:14:16 AM

oldfarthenry: Great Janitor: Fun fact: the U.S. nation anthem was based off a drinking song. Not the words, just the tune.

That explains it - I always that a beer-fart belonged in that pause after the first line.


you accidentally the whole fart
 
2013-07-08 10:20:57 AM
Yeah...no.
 
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