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(Washington Post)   Officials at D.C.'s Metro find final solution to the problem of unauthorized flowers planted outside a station. It was as if thousands of Morning Glories suddenly cried out in terror and were silenced   (washingtonpost.com) divider line 91
    More: Followup, Metro, Phantom Planter, police stations, Dan Stessel, transit system  
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8500 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Jul 2013 at 5:31 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-07 07:57:39 PM

DayeOfJustice: Am I the only that can understand why DC Metro wouldn't want an old man planting and tending to flowers on a steep, almost vertical incline?


No, it isn't completely unreasonable and I can't help but boggle at how he got up there to plant them.  The point isn't that it wasn't the best idea in the world, the point is he was trying to make things better, and a garden hose would have watered them.  And, so what?     The point is that fat, gray bureaucrats and their little fiefdoms that we pay the tab for have one answer to everything.  "Cause f*ck you, that's why."  And that's unacceptable.
 
2013-07-07 08:06:22 PM

Jabberwookiee: Ecological terrorism. Plain and simple. Hang the bastard.


farking Islams think they can come here and plant their death flowers.
 
2013-07-07 08:11:02 PM

Trid_Kicker: Duke_leto_Atredes: Dc metro and the dc govt are blac run completely it is not their fault the Sony know any better please stop pointing out their errors the just cant help it. So please just let them be.

A year of TotalFark to anyone who can successfully diagram the above.

/my reply has no subject
//Skitt's Law


The Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority and the Municipal Government of the District of Columbia are primarily managed and operated by attractive and successful African-Americans. The fault lies not with them, however. It is ingrained in their existence, and it is beyond their capability to change otherwise. It is in your best interest not to note any discrepanies in their governace. Thank you for your assistance in overlooking this matter in the future.
 
2013-07-07 08:16:30 PM

flondrix: I get the impression from some homeowners that morning glories have a downside, though I don't know the specifics.  I have heard that some climbing plants can do a surprising amount of damage to buildings, though--are morning glories among them?


They are very, very invasive, and almost impossible to get rid of. They look super ghetto, and smell bad as well. I bought a house in the winter of 2011, in the spring I realized that 3/4's of the yard was covered in them. It's been an ongoing battle to get rid of them. They destroy all the vegetation around them, and can grow up through concrete. It should be illegal to plant them IMO. In some places they will die completely over winter if it gets cold enough ( arctic cold).

I think ivy is the climber that can really mess with structures.
 
2013-07-07 08:22:27 PM
From TFA: Spokeswoman Caroline Lukas said that work had been "scheduled prior to the unauthorized planting of flowers." When it's complete, she said, Metro will plan "a low-maintenance ground cover."

Sounds like they're going to pave it over. Nice. Pfft.
 
2013-07-07 08:25:50 PM

Trid_Kicker: Duke_leto_Atredes: Dc metro and the dc govt are blac run completely it is not their fault the Sony know any better please stop pointing out their errors the just cant help it. So please just let them be.

A year of TotalFark to anyone who can successfully diagram the above.

/my reply has no subject
//Skitt's Law


I speak fluent drunk. Let me translate.

DC Metro and the DC Government are black run completely. It is not their fault. They don't know any better. Please stop pointing out their errors. They just can't help it. So please, just let them be.

No; it still doesn't make any better sense.
 
2013-07-07 08:31:54 PM
Good. Finally the metro is completely perfect.
 
2013-07-07 08:36:31 PM
I'm sure there is surveillance video of the workers beating the plants as well.
 
2013-07-07 08:49:29 PM

ElLoco: Gah. Morning glories? Spray those nasty things with 2,4-d and burn them before they spread.


This. These farkers will take over whatever space you may give them.

dryknife: Morning glory seeds contain an LSD-like compound and they were doing it to protect the children.


Unfortunately, most commercial varieties you get in a store have had this particular trait bred out of them. Though I've heard that the ones you'd find in Mexico will still let you trip.
 
2013-07-07 08:54:16 PM
not to defend metro, because I think this was completely boneheaded, but for people not from the area: the places where he planted the flowers are legitimately dangerous- steep inclines, no real place to stand safely, and they're tiled over most of it, meaning there's no real grip to climb.

that said, seriously metro? seriously?
 
2013-07-07 09:02:55 PM

libranoelrose: That has got to be the worst metropolitan area to live in.


Yeah, it's up there.
 
2013-07-07 09:07:45 PM
I'd love to hear thousands of Morning Glories cry out in terror and be silenced.  Problem is that would only remove them from just one person's yard.  Morning Glory is an invasive species blanketing the countryside here in Portland, Oregon.
farm4.staticflickr.com
/used to be such a lovely forest
 
2013-07-07 09:12:41 PM
Just plant more.  Easy.
 
2013-07-07 09:49:21 PM

DayeOfJustice: Wait. Am I the only that can understand why DC Metro wouldn't want an old man planting and tending to flowers on a steep, almost vertical incline? Also, am I the only that can understand why DC metro wouldn't want to dedicate money/workers/effort into this themselves? Maybe it's not the decision that you or I would make, but it's not this completely evil, malicious attempt to keep the man from planting flowers. The decision does have SOME merit at least. I ride the metro daily, so I know it's not the best (though I plan around it being terrible), but damn people, do we have to rage against every bureaucracy without perspective?


Why even have the planters on that slope to begin with?  The area has hose hookups so it wouldn't be that difficult to set-up some sort of auto watering system.  It appears at one point Metro intended on keeping the area planted and then long ago abandoned that idea.
 
2013-07-07 09:54:13 PM

Spirit Hammer: Duke_leto_Atredes: Dc metro and the dc govt are blac run completely it is not their fault the Sony know any better please stop pointing out their errors the just cant help it. So please just let them be.

Dude, you're too drunk to fark.
Go to sleep.


Good advice I think I will have another rum and coke
 
2013-07-07 10:15:28 PM

OtherLittleGuy: The Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority and the Municipal Government of the District of Columbia are primarily managed and operated by attractive and successful African-Americans. The fault lies not with them, however. It is ingrained in their existence, and it is beyond their capability to change otherwise. It is in your best interest not to note any discrepanies in their governace. Thank you for your assistance in overlooking this matter in the future.


Spirit Hammer: I speak fluent drunk. Let me translate.

DC Metro and the DC Government are black run completely. It is not their fault. They don't know any better. Please stop pointing out their errors. They just can't help it. So please, just let them be.


These both seem plausible. But I'd like to know what the fark Sony has to do with any of this.
 
2013-07-07 10:22:23 PM
Morning glories are evil plants.  They spread like a plague wherever they are planted, so I can understand the DC Metro yanking them.

Still, it baffles me why they do not just lease the planting rights to areas outside of their stations.
 
2013-07-07 10:56:39 PM

Jabberwookiee: OtherLittleGuy: The Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority and the Municipal Government of the District of Columbia are primarily managed and operated by attractive and successful African-Americans. The fault lies not with them, however. It is ingrained in their existence, and it is beyond their capability to change otherwise. It is in your best interest not to note any discrepanies in their governace. Thank you for your assistance in overlooking this matter in the future.

Spirit Hammer: I speak fluent drunk. Let me translate.

DC Metro and the DC Government are black run completely. It is not their fault. They don't know any better. Please stop pointing out their errors. They just can't help it. So please, just let them be.

These both seem plausible. But I'd like to know what the fark Sony has to do with any of this.


Rootkits.
 
2013-07-07 11:03:16 PM

Jabberwookiee: OtherLittleGuy: The Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority and the Municipal Government of the District of Columbia are primarily managed and operated by attractive and successful African-Americans. The fault lies not with them, however. It is ingrained in their existence, and it is beyond their capability to change otherwise. It is in your best interest not to note any discrepanies in their governace. Thank you for your assistance in overlooking this matter in the future.

Spirit Hammer: I speak fluent drunk. Let me translate.

DC Metro and the DC Government are black run completely. It is not their fault. They don't know any better. Please stop pointing out their errors. They just can't help it. So please, just let them be.

These both seem plausible. But I'd like to know what the fark Sony has to do with any of this.


(Featured Partner)
 
2013-07-07 11:33:50 PM

Silverstaff: It reminds me of a story I had to read in junior high, twentysome years ago.

I don't remember the name of it, but it was about some kid that moved to a city.  He hung out with other kids, and they had this hangout on the roof of an abandoned factory.  He talks his friends into cultivating a garden, in an inner city/urban decay area, and these kids are basically complete strangers to greenspace.  They go to lengths to get their hands on seeds and topsoil and such and make this beautiful lush garden on the roof of this building.

Then one day some men show up on the roof at their hangout, it was the buildings owner and some of his workers, and he expels the kids from his property and has the garden destroyed.  The story went to some detail describing how the sod and plants were ripped up and tossed off the roof.  Then the story just ended, on that downer ending.

Always made me glad I was growing up in the country, and made me realize I could never live in a big metropolitan area where there is no grass and everyone is so cut off from the soil and natural life.


I remember reading that too.  Putting gardens on roofs can be a problem though, if the roof isn't rated for the weight.  It can cause all sorts of problems with sag.
 
2013-07-07 11:34:49 PM

DayeOfJustice: Wait. Am I the only that can understand why DC Metro wouldn't want an old man planting and tending to flowers on a steep, almost vertical incline? Also, am I the only that can understand why DC metro wouldn't want to dedicate money/workers/effort into this themselves? Maybe it's not the decision that you or I would make, but it's not this completely evil, malicious attempt to keep the man from planting flowers. The decision does have SOME merit at least. I ride the metro daily, so I know it's not the best (though I plan around it being terrible), but damn people, do we have to rage against every bureaucracy without perspective?


Get out of here with your reasonable assessment.
This is Fark.
 
2013-07-08 12:07:01 AM

bunner: Vector R: Everything you need to know about the Metro is right here: http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2012/mar/26/metro-derailed-by-cul t ure-of-complacence-incompete/

Thanks again to the Farker who posted that last time, it was very illuminating.

[static.tvtropes.org image 320x263]

THAT'S RACIST!


We Metro now.
 
2013-07-08 12:50:33 AM

sendtodave: Rootkits.


OtherLittleGuy: (Featured Partner)


The judges have informed me that both of these answers would be acceptable.

Goddamn I love this place.
 
2013-07-08 12:58:15 AM

Oak: Free flowers?  The penalty is DEATH.

/Judge Dredd's America


Honestly, it does feel a little bit like that. THEY'RE FLOWERS. Hurts no one, cost no gov't money in this case, brings a little beauty to daily life... zomg, let's destroy it!

/tear for the pretties
 
2013-07-08 01:05:50 AM
 DC Metro has been known for years to be an absolute poster child for an almost unbelievable level entrenched corruption, fraud, waste, and abuse, along with union issues that pale in comparison to even the most obnoxious parody of anti-union stereotypes, and institutional racism and sexism that could not be any more overt if it tried (and at a level that makes the Jim Crow south look downright friendly in comparison).

 Only problem is, the institutional racism is being enforced by blacks, so no politician wants to touch it with a ten foot pole for fear of being branded a racist themselves. Even if DC has to build another identical transit system right next to the current one to actually get people places they will, no one will -EVER- touch the billions they pour into the minority handout that is the current system.
 
2013-07-08 02:41:51 AM
Just replant them... DC Metro won't waste their resources ripping them out forever.
 
2013-07-08 02:46:59 AM

HotIgneous Intruder: Plus, the brown terraists can hide their nefarious devices in them there planters under them leaves.
Got to pertekt Merkuns.


idiot
 
2013-07-08 03:05:54 AM

JesusJuice: Just replant them... DC Metro won't waste their resources ripping them out forever.


 you don't know dc metro. they would shut down the damn trains if they had to, to reallocate the personnel to do that now that its on their radar.

 squashing any real or imagined challenge to their authority, no matter how slight, tends to become a high priority in any bureaucracy .
in a pure bureaucracy - like dc metro - that only exists solely to perpetuate the bureaucracy, it raises to the level of outright paranoid obsession.

 "the bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of the expanding bureaucracy" - wilde
 
2013-07-08 06:28:50 AM
blog.golfnow.com.s3.amazonaws.com
He's on his final hole. He's about 455 yards away, he's gonna hit about a 2 iron I think.
 
2013-07-08 07:24:52 AM

dukeblue219: Vector R: Everything you need to know about the Metro is right here: http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2012/mar/26/metro-derailed-by-cul t ure-of-complacence-incompete/

Thanks again to the Farker who posted that last time, it was very illuminating.

Don't trust anything from the Washington Times.... not to defend Metro here


This. It is like reading a North Korean report on Italian governmental incompetence. The Moon Paper is not fit to housetrain puppies with.
 
2013-07-08 08:32:51 AM

HoratioGates: Silverstaff: It reminds me of a story I had to read in junior high, twentysome years ago.

I don't remember the name of it, but it was about some kid that moved to a city.  He hung out with other kids, and they had this hangout on the roof of an abandoned factory.  He talks his friends into cultivating a garden, in an inner city/urban decay area, and these kids are basically complete strangers to greenspace.  They go to lengths to get their hands on seeds and topsoil and such and make this beautiful lush garden on the roof of this building.

Then one day some men show up on the roof at their hangout, it was the buildings owner and some of his workers, and he expels the kids from his property and has the garden destroyed.  The story went to some detail describing how the sod and plants were ripped up and tossed off the roof.  Then the story just ended, on that downer ending.

Always made me glad I was growing up in the country, and made me realize I could never live in a big metropolitan area where there is no grass and everyone is so cut off from the soil and natural life.

I remember reading that too.  Putting gardens on roofs can be a problem though, if the roof isn't rated for the weight.  It can cause all sorts of problems with sag.


Not to mention it wasn't their damn roof.
 
2013-07-08 08:35:32 AM

jonmurr: Remember kids, this this a bureaucracy. Doesn't matter if it is public or private, they are concerned with process and policy. Not results.
You here it time and time again. "We followed our policy."  Outcomes, positive or negative, are simply incidental to the process.  And there is never a bureaucrat that will make  a call that might be construed as giving them accountability for a decision. If that bureaucrat is in a position that would even allow for such a decision, you can be dammed sure that that person has learned that no good deeds go unpunished. Thus you get what you see here.


Exactly right
 
2013-07-08 09:29:21 AM
l.yimg.com
 
2013-07-08 10:25:16 AM

JesusJuice: Just replant them... DC Metro won't waste their resources ripping them out forever.


That's what I'm saying.  Create a seed bomb and just toss it in there.  The sun and rain will do the rest ...
 
2013-07-08 10:45:51 AM

Vector R: Everything you need to know about the Metro is right here: http://www.washingtontimes.com/hurr/durr/burr/

Thanks again to the Farker who posted that last time, it was very illuminating.


M-O-O-N.  That spells NGTRTFA.
 
2013-07-08 11:50:28 AM

dukeblue219: libranoelrose: That has got to be the worst metropolitan area to live in.

Actually it's quite nice... maybe give it a try before you knock it.


It farking sucks. It's overly expensive and full of self important ass holes who think their job (which could be, and in fact is, done by a well trained monkey) is absolutely critical for the continuation of the American form of government and way of life. They are also largely thieves who will do everything they can to waste taxpayer money so long as they get theirs. There's nice places surrounding it, but traffic is so bad you can't farking get there.

And the Metro sucks. It sucks hard.

/currently sitting in an office in DC.
 
2013-07-08 12:08:46 PM

Mike Chewbacca: Vector R: Everything you need to know about the Metro is right here: http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2012/mar/26/metro-derailed-by-cul t ure-of-complacence-incompete/

Thanks again to the Farker who posted that last time, it was very illuminating.

Moonie times? Really?


You don't expect to see coverage of black racism in the mainstream news, do you?
 
2013-07-08 12:14:37 PM
Yesterday a morning came, a smile upon your face.
Caesar's palace, morning glory, silly human race,
On a sailing ship to nowhere, leaving any place,
If the summer change to winter, yours is no disgrace.
 
2013-07-08 02:31:22 PM

Spade: dukeblue219: libranoelrose:

And the Metro sucks. It sucks hard.

/currently sitting in an office in DC.


I have heard a lot of complaints about the Metro, but when I did the tourist thing in 2011 I didn't really have any problems with it. The bus system, now, holy shiat is that hard to understand if you're from out of town. I spent an hour riding around Anacostia because I didn't know what bus to get on to get to the closest stop near the National Arboretum... It was an interesting experience.
 
2013-07-08 05:49:31 PM

Spade: It farking sucks. It's overly expensive and full of self important ass holes who think their job (which could be, and in fact is, done by a well trained monkey) is absolutely critical for the continuation of the American form of government and way of life. They are also largely thieves who will do everything they can to waste taxpayer money so long as they get theirs. There's nice places surrounding it, but traffic is so bad you can't farking get there.


It sure sounds like you're tying the Federal Government to the city itself way too closely. I don't know... the vast majority of people I meet either don't work for the government at all, or if they do, it's a regular job and hardly the sort of thing they're going to be snobby about. Yep, there's a lot of waste (call it theft if you want) in the government, but I fail to see how that reflects on the metropolitan area as a place to live. You're still subject to the same federal issues if you live in Seattle.

Me? I happen to like the enormous variety of restaurants, theaters, and museums that I can walk to or ride the train to if traffic is bad. I like the number of sports teams we have and the number of concert venues. I like the low unemployment rate and large availability of good housing. I find it's a really fun city to live in, and don't really see the connection between a dislike of the federal government and a dislike for the city.

Spade: And the Metro sucks. It sucks hard.


Well, maybe I'm biased coming from Atlanta previously, but I think Metro is pretty effective. It gets me where I want to go with maybe a 10-minute wait for a train on the worst day for like $2.60 each way. Safe, clean, and spacious stations compared to most metro systems in the country I've ridden. Which do you find are better?
 
2013-07-08 05:57:40 PM

Todd300: WantsMoreGovernmentMoreGovernment.jpg


Roight, guv.  A privately-owned Metro would so totally allow some guy to come on their private property and plant flowers.
 
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