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(Village Voice)   In a new Marvel comics chick-lit novel, She-Hulk reveals that Tony "Iron Man" Stark is a great lover who invented nanobots to "retrieve wayward sperm"   (villagevoice.com) divider line 43
    More: Amusing, Jennifer Walters, Ms. Marvel, nanorobotics, sperm, comics, Emma Frost  
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3786 clicks; posted to Geek » on 02 Jul 2013 at 9:33 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-02 09:46:00 PM
home.comcast.net
 
2013-07-02 09:49:26 PM
FTFA: "The X-Men's leather-favoring goth belle, Rogue."

Rogue's a goth now? I thought Vampilee was the resident goth. I've only been peripherally paying attention to Marvel recently, though, so that could have changed for all I know.
 
2013-07-02 10:16:05 PM
I'm rather disappointed that the Rouge book doesn't have 150 pages of Gambit trying to put the moves on her and losing his powers in hilarious ways. One of my favorite things in the old cartoon was that Mystique could easily play the "trick Gambit into thinking Rouge was safe to touch" card at any time and he'd fall for it.
 
2013-07-02 10:16:18 PM
I just showed this to my wife so I'm sure she will shamefully be getting these for her kindle.  The woman can quote any classic but she does have a weakness for crotch novels.

/no complaints from me....they do make her frisky.
 
2013-07-02 10:19:31 PM
Tony Stark for the ladies:
1.bp.blogspot.com

and She-Hulk for the guys:
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-07-02 10:21:19 PM
I'm sure they'll crank out a shiat fest movie next summer.
 
2013-07-02 10:24:59 PM
I just want to know why the book is being held by a cat...

media.villagevoice.com
 
2013-07-02 10:33:48 PM

TheManofPA: Tony Stark for the ladies:


and She-Hulk for the guys:


No. Just no.
 
2013-07-02 10:37:41 PM

Emposter: I just want to know why the book is being held by a cat...

[media.villagevoice.com image 500x395]


They know their market.
 
2013-07-02 11:10:52 PM

Empty H: Emposter: I just want to know why the book is being held by a cat...

[media.villagevoice.com image 500x395]

They know their market.


Ha! Exactly.
 
2013-07-02 11:16:34 PM
She-Hulk chick-clit SMASH!

www.quizzle.com
 
2013-07-02 11:20:14 PM
Snu-snu?
 
2013-07-02 11:23:17 PM

TheManofPA: and She-Hulk for the guys:


img13.imageshack.us

She'd look good in green.
 
2013-07-02 11:24:04 PM
If so that's pretty much a ripoff or at least a nod to Larry Niven's Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex  http://www.rawbw.com/~svw/superman.html

i.imgur.com

Continues here:  http://www.rawbw.com/~svw/superman.html
 
2013-07-02 11:31:16 PM

RoyBatty: If so that's pretty much a ripoff or at least a nod to Larry Niven's Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex  http://www.rawbw.com/~svw/superman.html

[i.imgur.com image 618x1008]

Continues here:  http://www.rawbw.com/~svw/superman.html


No, looks like Kevin Smith is the ripoff artist in this equation.

/never liked him anyway.
/horrible farking movies
 
2013-07-02 11:35:37 PM

TheManofPA: I'm rather disappointed that the Rouge book doesn't have 150 pages of Gambit trying to put the moves on her and losing his powers in hilarious ways. One of my favorite things in the old cartoon was that Mystique could easily play the "trick Gambit into thinking Rouge was safe to touch" card at any time and he'd fall for it.


I think Rogue has control of her powers now.
 
2013-07-03 12:01:42 AM

Arachnophobe: FTFA: "The X-Men's leather-favoring goth belle, Rogue."

Rogue's a goth now? I thought Vampilee was the resident goth. I've only been peripherally paying attention to Marvel recently, though, so that could have changed for all I know.


Nope, everyone's back to normal. Thank you Brian Wood, thank you.
 
2013-07-03 01:46:43 AM

texdent: TheManofPA: I'm rather disappointed that the Rouge book doesn't have 150 pages of Gambit trying to put the moves on her and losing his powers in hilarious ways. One of my favorite things in the old cartoon was that Mystique could easily play the "trick Gambit into thinking Rouge was safe to touch" card at any time and he'd fall for it.

I think Rogue has control of her powers now.


616? Ultimates? You can't just say shiat like that without being specific.

/worked in a comic book store in high school.
//had sex all the time.
///not really.
 
2013-07-03 03:45:24 AM
Carry On My Wayward Sperm
 
2013-07-03 05:28:50 AM
Stark is a great lover who invented nanobots to "retrieve wayward sperm"

Not worried about grey goo?
 
2013-07-03 05:46:43 AM

Snapper Carr: TheManofPA: and She-Hulk for the guys:

[img13.imageshack.us image 134x200]

She'd look good in green.


don't think she's hard up for money like chyna is.

/chyna does not look good in any color.
 
2013-07-03 05:58:06 AM

TheManofPA: and She-Hulk for the guys:
[2.bp.blogspot.com image 179x320]


Uh no, fark no, and double-fark no~!  Not the clenis, sorry...but there's just some lines I won't cross.
 
2013-07-03 06:09:56 AM

texdent: TheManofPA: I'm rather disappointed that the Rouge book doesn't have 150 pages of Gambit trying to put the moves on her and losing his powers in hilarious ways. One of my favorite things in the old cartoon was that Mystique could easily play the "trick Gambit into thinking Rouge was safe to touch" card at any time and he'd fall for it.

I think Rogue has control of her powers now.


So far as I remember, she did lose all of her powers at one time, then regained her mutant power but was able to control it.
 
2013-07-03 06:34:33 AM
So - there you go; some of that "Strong Female Lead" character crap that chick was biatching about a few days ago. And written by a womyn, too. The womyn are doing it for themselves, I see. So she can stop... what? It's all about her stuffin' her muffin? All excited about talking about sperm?

Yeah, well... there you go.That's why women can't have strong lead characters; women writers can't get over writing about the crevice between their legs and horking salami.
 
2013-07-03 07:01:50 AM

perigee: So - there you go; some of that "Strong Female Lead" character crap that chick was biatching about a few days ago. And written by a womyn, too. The womyn are doing it for themselves, I see. So she can stop... what? It's all about her stuffin' her muffin? All excited about talking about sperm?

Yeah, well... there you go.That's why women can't have strong lead characters; women writers can't get over writing about the crevice between their legs and horking salami.


Two women walk into a bar.

They discuss the Bechdel Test.

/do they pass the Bechdel Test?
 
2013-07-03 07:11:47 AM
I've never understood the appeal of She-Hulk, or why she needs to exist as a character (though at least unlike other female knockoffs of popular male heroes, she's got a sense of humor and practices law).

I also can't understand why any female would want to read Marvel-flavored chick lit, and more than I can understand Marvel's constant attempts to cross over with female-friendly media like soap operas. I get the whole "let's expand into new markets" idea, but some things just don't work well together,
 
2013-07-03 07:22:54 AM

secularsage: I've never understood the appeal of She-Hulk, or why she needs to exist as a character (though at least unlike other female knockoffs of popular male heroes, she's got a sense of humor and practices law).

I also can't understand why any female would want to read Marvel-flavored chick lit, and more than I can understand Marvel's constant attempts to cross over with female-friendly media like soap operas. I get the whole "let's expand into new markets" idea, but some things just don't work well together,


See, I think Marvel could put together a good female-oriented story.  They just fall back on terrible notions of "what females want".  I'd be willing to bet that a psychological thriller story exploring Rogue trying to get Mrs. Marvel out of her head.

/getting someone to draw realistic people would also help; anyone ever associated with Liefeld needs to be kept 100 miles away from the project
 
2013-07-03 07:28:08 AM

sendtodave: Stark is a great lover who invented nanobots to "retrieve wayward sperm"

Not worried about grey goo?


Grey goo, contrary to white goo, doesn't increase the risk of alimony payments.
 
2013-07-03 07:46:50 AM
Hmmm. These do not appear to be the Marvel funny-books of my childhood.
 
2013-07-03 08:00:46 AM

not5am: Snapper Carr: TheManofPA: and She-Hulk for the guys:

[img13.imageshack.us image 134x200]

She'd look good in green.

don't think she's hard up for money like chyna is.

/chyna does not look good in any color.


I thought that looked like Chyna.    Jesus.   Do not want.
 
2013-07-03 08:49:00 AM
Someone mentioned nanomachines?

spinoff.comicbookresources.com
 
2013-07-03 09:16:11 AM

WhippingBoy: Empty H: Emposter: I just want to know why the book is being held by a cat...

[media.villagevoice.com image 500x395]

They know their market.

Ha! Exactly.


There's an anigif of the cat and the book on page two...  just in case the stills were too subtle, I suppose.
 
2013-07-03 10:20:56 AM
At least it's not a Chick-Tract.  That would make for some really awkward fiction.
 
2013-07-03 11:23:46 AM
In today's modern world isn't the idea that there is no way to keep the shrapnel from migrating into Tony's heart a bit ridiculous?  Maybe if the reactor thing was his heart it would make more sense.
 
2013-07-03 11:51:24 AM

manimal2878: In today's modern world isn't the idea that there is no way to keep the shrapnel from migrating into Tony's heart a bit ridiculous?  Maybe if the reactor thing was his heart it would make more sense.


When I was younger, I thought the original idea was kinda of like a pace maker. It keeps tony's heart beating.
 
2013-07-03 12:14:14 PM

yves0010: manimal2878: In today's modern world isn't the idea that there is no way to keep the shrapnel from migrating into Tony's heart a bit ridiculous?  Maybe if the reactor thing was his heart it would make more sense.

When I was younger, I thought the original idea was kinda of like a pace maker. It keeps tony's heart beating.


I watched Avengers last night and he specifically has a line about how the shrapnel is just hanging out  and if not for the reactor it would move into his heart and kill him.

Really, you can't remove that shiat, with all the robotic machinery you are able to build?
 
2013-07-03 12:22:32 PM
Oh, I see he does in Iron man 3, maybe I should watch it.
 
2013-07-03 12:24:24 PM

SPOILERS

manimal2878:
yves0010: manimal2878: In today's modern world isn't the idea that there is no way to keep the shrapnel from migrating into Tony's heart a bit ridiculous?  Maybe if the reactor thing was his heart it would make more sense.

When I was younger, I thought the original idea was kinda of like a pace maker. It keeps tony's heart beating.

I watched Avengers last night and he specifically has a line about how the shrapnel is just hanging out  and if not for the reactor it would move into his heart and kill him.

Really, you can't remove that shiat, with all the robotic machinery you are able to build?


Part of the reason I hated IM3. They spent how much time from the beginning of IM through IM2, Avengers, and IM3 with it in. Then finally at then end of IM3, while he's doing a voice over summary, they show a 5 second clip of him going under the knife to have it removed like it wasn't a problem at all to take it out.
 
2013-07-03 12:59:51 PM
My take was that Tony needed the reactor to power the suit/keep the shrapnel at bay. Once he escaped from the terrorists he could have spent the time to remove the shrapnel but chose to be a bad ass instead. Then he got real busy improving the suit design and just used the shrapnel story as an excuse/motivation tool knowing full well he was just too damn lazy and preoccupied to remove the shrapnel. At the end of IM3 he finally gets his priorities straight.
 
2013-07-03 01:38:53 PM

Fatbeard: My take was that Tony needed the reactor to power the suit/keep the shrapnel at bay. Once he escaped from the terrorists he could have spent the time to remove the shrapnel but chose to be a bad ass instead. Then he got real busy improving the suit design and just used the shrapnel story as an excuse/motivation tool knowing full well he was just too damn lazy and preoccupied to remove the shrapnel. At the end of IM3 he finally gets his priorities straight.


Though he does mention during the montage that the healy stuff that made the guys all hot and bothered and sometimes explody helped in getting it out.  maybe it wasn't just the shrapenel but also the giant hole in his chest that the arc reactor sits in that would need to be healed up?
 
2013-07-03 01:47:33 PM

hammer85: Fatbeard: My take was that Tony needed the reactor to power the suit/keep the shrapnel at bay. Once he escaped from the terrorists he could have spent the time to remove the shrapnel but chose to be a bad ass instead. Then he got real busy improving the suit design and just used the shrapnel story as an excuse/motivation tool knowing full well he was just too damn lazy and preoccupied to remove the shrapnel. At the end of IM3 he finally gets his priorities straight.

Though he does mention during the montage that the healy stuff that made the guys all hot and bothered and sometimes explody helped in getting it out.  maybe it wasn't just the shrapenel but also the giant hole in his chest that the arc reactor sits in that would need to be healed up?


Unfortunately I only caught part of the ending of IM3 thanks to the platoon of children sitting behind us and their helicopter parents.
/If you won't tell by our kid to be quiet don't get pissed when I tell them to shut up.
 
2013-07-03 01:56:53 PM

hammer85: Fatbeard: My take was that Tony needed the reactor to power the suit/keep the shrapnel at bay. Once he escaped from the terrorists he could have spent the time to remove the shrapnel but chose to be a bad ass instead. Then he got real busy improving the suit design and just used the shrapnel story as an excuse/motivation tool knowing full well he was just too damn lazy and preoccupied to remove the shrapnel. At the end of IM3 he finally gets his priorities straight.

Though he does mention during the montage that the healy stuff that made the guys all hot and bothered and sometimes explody helped in getting it out.  maybe it wasn't just the shrapenel but also the giant hole in his chest that the arc reactor sits in that would need to be healed up?


That was the implication I got - Tony and Pepper are now infused with Extremis, but a more stable form of it based off of Maya's work.
 
2013-07-03 04:49:35 PM

TheManofPA: Tony Stark for the ladies:


and She-Hulk for the guys:


TripleGagneClenisFlashback.jpg

/You magnificent bastard...
 
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