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(AsiaOne)   Vatican miracle judges approve John Paul II for sainthood, fail to announce plans to appear at next SXSW   (asiaone.com) divider line 33
    More: Obvious, John Paul II, Vatican, south by southwest, La Stampa, ANSA, pope  
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2220 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Jul 2013 at 11:28 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Archived thread
2013-07-02 11:57:37 AM
4 votes:
You have your saints. We'll have our own.

www.brooklynvegan.com

farm6.staticflickr.com
2013-07-02 11:51:35 AM
3 votes:

ZAZ: manimal2878

Catholic doctrine says saints do not perform miracles directly, but intercede on your behalf to persuade God to work a miracle. Divine lobbyists, you could call them. The miracles are evidence that the deceased is in heaven. I suppose the damned are not as persuasive when it comes to asking for favors.


And now part 2 in a series I will call "explaining religious silliness in a way we can all understand" I will cover the topic of "Scapulars."  These items were worn by people to demonstrate their faith in exchange for certain promises or indulgences. For example, if you wore them you could eat meat on Friday during lent and have it not be a sin. Or, in some rare cases, wearing them at the time of your death meant you could enter straight into heaven without having a layover in purgatory first. Essentially, they were celestial back-stage passes. And oddly enough, they looked like them:

www.tldm.org
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-07-02 11:37:42 AM
3 votes:
manimal2878

Catholic doctrine says saints do not perform miracles directly, but intercede on your behalf to persuade God to work a miracle. Divine lobbyists, you could call them. The miracles are evidence that the deceased is in heaven. I suppose the damned are not as persuasive when it comes to asking for favors.
2013-07-02 11:36:35 AM
3 votes:
...and he is credited with a miracle that took place 6 years after he died?  Please.  People actually believe this shiat?
2013-07-02 10:39:47 AM
3 votes:

Mangoose: I know Zeppelin had a great rhythm section, but that's taking it a little too far.


If ONLY that was what was going on.

I can't believe this shiat is taken seriously.
2013-07-02 09:56:31 AM
3 votes:
Yeah, but the first miracle was just a card trick.
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-07-02 09:48:11 AM
3 votes:
In the early days of the Roman Catholic Church, martyrdom was the more usual grounds for sainthood than the performance of miracles, which in modern days are mostly posthumous.

Beatification by martyrdom is also posthumous.
2013-07-02 12:53:15 PM
2 votes:
It's interesting that when Jebus performed a miracle, it was bringing a dead guy back to life, or feeding hundreds of witnesses with a couple of fish and a loaf of bread, or changing water into wine... things that were big, and visible, and allegedly witnessed by many people.

But now, in the age of camera phones and Youtube, all we get are things like "Several years ago, some nun was sick, then she prayed, then she got better. It's a miracle!"  with absolutely zero corroboration from any parties not directly interested in making him a saint.
2013-07-02 12:40:49 PM
2 votes:

CowboyJeff: If we can interrupt the usual Fark (c) Catholic Bashing, lets look at some facts.  When Pope John Pal II came into office the world was in the middle of a cold war that everyone assumed would end in mushroom clouds all over the world.  President Reagan formed a secret alliance with AFL-CIO president Lane Kirkland and the Pope to secretly get money and equipment to the Polish Soidarity movement.  The Bulgarian secret police (the same one that sent aid and wepons to Nelson Mandela) tried to assinate the Pope, and failed.  Soldarity succeded in overthrowing the Polish government and then like dominoes the whole Soviet bloc collapsed, the Berlin Wall fell and then the Soviet Union collapsed....ALL WITHOUT A SHOT BEING FIRED....NO MUSHROOM CLOUDS...for a child of the cold war, that sounds like a miracle to me..and I am not even Catholic.


Huh?

He wasn't one of the Avengers and you are engaging in some serious retconning to give the man credit for ending the cold war when all he wass doing was shuffling around in his pajamas all day while a mutlitude of Priests were buggering small boys.  Under his watch, and he knew it was going on.  His one and only concern was to protect the Church, not those at risk children.

Miracle my ass. (Sorry, poor choice of words.)
2013-07-02 12:35:17 PM
2 votes:

CowboyJeff: If we can interrupt the usual Fark (c) Catholic Bashing, lets look at some facts.  When Pope John Pal II came into office the world was in the middle of a cold war that everyone assumed would end in mushroom clouds all over the world.  President Reagan formed a secret alliance with AFL-CIO president Lane Kirkland and the Pope to secretly get money and equipment to the Polish Soidarity movement.  The Bulgarian secret police (the same one that sent aid and wepons to Nelson Mandela) tried to assinate the Pope, and failed.  Soldarity succeded in overthrowing the Polish government and then like dominoes the whole Soviet bloc collapsed, the Berlin Wall fell and then the Soviet Union collapsed....ALL WITHOUT A SHOT BEING FIRED....NO MUSHROOM CLOUDS...for a child of the cold war, that sounds like a miracle to me..and I am not even Catholic.


That's strange...your definition of "miracle" seems to strongly resemble "things people did."
2013-07-02 12:27:58 PM
2 votes:

The first "miracle" was called bullshiat back in 2010. Let me guess: the church is just counting on the willful ignorance of their followers:



Link
2013-07-02 12:04:11 PM
2 votes:

KrispyKritter: MaudlinMutantMollusk: raerae1980: Mangoose: I know Zeppelin had a great rhythm section, but that's taking it a little too far.

If ONLY that was what was going on.

I can't believe this shiat is taken seriously.

That. Right there.

yous are aware there are many religions in which people perform rituals and accept by faith, right? these things are nothing new. millions around the globe participate. it may offend your sensibilities but it shouldn't be hard to believe these things take place.


He/She wasn't shocked that the canonization was happening.  He's astounded that people continue to languish in the delusion of religion.

And if they'll make people who facilitate child abuse a saint, then they'll make ANYONE  a saint.
2013-07-02 11:32:44 AM
2 votes:
Aren't they supposed to wait a hundred years or so so that it's harder for people to remember this guy didn't actually perform any miracles.
2013-07-02 01:52:59 PM
1 votes:

James!: Seriously guys, magic happened.  Zombie magic confirmed by actual adults.


I know. These skeptics drive me nuts.

Look.... a a religious organization has investigated itself and found that in fact it's leader performed miracles. What could POSSIBLY be suspicious about that? Where's the conflict of interest? I am confident that they controlled the experiment for placebo effect.

See also:

www.skepdic.com

ironicjesus.files.wordpress.com
2013-07-02 01:27:30 PM
1 votes:
Pope John Paul II Forgives Molested Children
May 22, 2002 - Vatican City
"Though grave and terrible sins have been committed, our Lord teaches us to turn the other cheek and forgive those who sin against us," said the pope, reading a prepared statement from a balcony overlooking St. Peter's Square. "That is why, despite the terrible wrongs they have committed, the church must move on and forgive these children for their misdeeds."
2013-07-02 01:21:45 PM
1 votes:

CowboyJeff: People who wait for Humans to perform miracles are going to be severly disappointed.  I think that God worked throgh Pope John Paul II, Ronald Reagan and Lane Kirkland to bring a peaceful end to the Cold War.  Sorry if that is not Farker approved thought, but for soemone who was living during those scary times, it makes more sense than to just think that man did something.



I lived through the same period, and watched the actual hard work of thousands of people (on both sides of the Iron Curtain) ultimately result in the end of the Cold War.  I think it's kind of an insult to all of those people to say that the end of the cold war was really the result of some guy in a funny hat doing a magic trick.

We seem to have different opinions about what makes sense.
2013-07-02 01:15:53 PM
1 votes:

Barricaded Gunman: It's interesting that when Jebus performed a miracle, it was bringing a dead guy back to life, or feeding hundreds of witnesses with a couple of fish and a loaf of bread, or changing water into wine... things that were big, and visible, and allegedly witnessed by many people.

But now, in the age of camera phones and Youtube, all we get are things like "Several years ago, some nun was sick, then she prayed, then she got better. It's a miracle!"  with absolutely zero corroboration from any parties not directly interested in making him a saint.


images2.wikia.nocookie.net
2013-07-02 01:04:33 PM
1 votes:
I've always thought it was funny that a group of living humans decide which dead human gets to be a saint. Can't you just see those candidates for sainthood sitting around Heaven, waiting for some mortals to give them their promotion?
2013-07-02 01:00:28 PM
1 votes:
Lets hope a tornado or tsunami or haboob wipes Austin off the map.  So sick of hearing about SXSW.   It's like the new Burning Man.
2013-07-02 12:58:49 PM
1 votes:

CowboyJeff: People who wait for Humans to perform miracles are going to be severly disappointed.  I think that God worked throgh Pope John Paul II, Ronald Reagan and Lane Kirkland to bring a peaceful end to the Cold War.  Sorry if that is not Farker approved thought, but for soemone who was living during those scary times, it makes more sense than to just think that man did something.


Surely you have some proof to back up your assertion.  (Remember, extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.)  And because your assertion is based on the existence of this "God," you must have some proof of his or her or its existence.
2013-07-02 12:41:19 PM
1 votes:
I heard these Vatican miracle judges moonlight as FISA court judges. Do you think there's any truth to that? They're good with that rubber stamp.
2013-07-02 12:33:49 PM
1 votes:

CowboyJeff: If we can interrupt the usual Fark (c) Catholic Bashing, lets look at some facts.  When Pope John Pal II came into office the world was in the middle of a cold war that everyone assumed would end in mushroom clouds all over the world.  President Reagan formed a secret alliance with AFL-CIO president Lane Kirkland and the Pope to secretly get money and equipment to the Polish Soidarity movement.  The Bulgarian secret police (the same one that sent aid and wepons to Nelson Mandela) tried to assinate the Pope, and failed.  Soldarity succeded in overthrowing the Polish government and then like dominoes the whole Soviet bloc collapsed, the Berlin Wall fell and then the Soviet Union collapsed....ALL WITHOUT A SHOT BEING FIRED....NO MUSHROOM CLOUDS...for a child of the cold war, that sounds like a miracle to me..and I am not even Catholic.


I call the two most powerful countries in the world spending themselves into oblivion a miracle too, a miracle someone with some sanity didn't figure out a way to stop it
ecl
2013-07-02 12:32:05 PM
1 votes:
"Stupid people congregate to practice complex idiocy, pick a new saint"
2013-07-02 12:30:27 PM
1 votes:
If we can interrupt the usual Fark (c) Catholic Bashing, lets look at some facts.  When Pope John Pal II came into office the world was in the middle of a cold war that everyone assumed would end in mushroom clouds all over the world.  President Reagan formed a secret alliance with AFL-CIO president Lane Kirkland and the Pope to secretly get money and equipment to the Polish Soidarity movement.  The Bulgarian secret police (the same one that sent aid and wepons to Nelson Mandela) tried to assinate the Pope, and failed.  Soldarity succeded in overthrowing the Polish government and then like dominoes the whole Soviet bloc collapsed, the Berlin Wall fell and then the Soviet Union collapsed....ALL WITHOUT A SHOT BEING FIRED....NO MUSHROOM CLOUDS...for a child of the cold war, that sounds like a miracle to me..and I am not even Catholic.
2013-07-02 12:20:34 PM
1 votes:
Vatican official arrested in corruption plot

A Vatican official has been arrested by Italian police for allegedly trying to illegally bring 20 million euros ($26 million) in cash into the country from Switzerland with a private jet.

Organized religion criminals
2013-07-02 12:04:48 PM
1 votes:
'Vatican Miracle Judges' is the cool band name of the day.
2013-07-02 12:02:41 PM
1 votes:

ZAZ: Catholic doctrine says saints do not perform miracles directly, but intercede on your behalf to persuade God to work a miracle.


Pope JP the Deuce: "Hey, God? Got a sec?"
God: "Uh, no, rather busy with the universe at the moment. But what's up?"
Pope JP the Deuce:  "See that nun down there? She's got Parkinson's Disease."
God: "I know. I gave it to her."
Pope JP the Deuce: "Oh, yeah... right. Um... "
2013-07-02 11:42:02 AM
1 votes:
When will Dolan get his?

Dolan Sought to Protect Church Assets, Files Show

Files released by the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Milwaukee on Monday reveal that in 2007, Cardinal Timothy F. Dolan, then the archbishop there, requested permission from the Vatican to move nearly $57 million into a cemetery trust fund to protect the assets from victims of clergy sexual abuse who were demanding compensation.

Beatification indeed.
2013-07-02 11:38:13 AM
1 votes:

manimal2878: ...and he is credited with a miracle that took place 6 years after he died?  Please.  People actually believe this shiat?


Double edged sword. For the people who share the faith it's a validation of their beliefs. For people who don't it brings into relief the absurdity of it all.
2013-07-02 11:35:39 AM
1 votes:
Of course they did. Has their even been a top tier MVP Catholic in the last hundred years or so that wasn't put up?
2013-07-02 11:34:15 AM
1 votes:
What miracles did he do, besides shadow puppets?
2013-07-02 11:21:33 AM
1 votes:
Seriously guys, magic happened.  Zombie magic confirmed by actual adults.
2013-07-02 10:42:06 AM
1 votes:

raerae1980: Mangoose: I know Zeppelin had a great rhythm section, but that's taking it a little too far.

If ONLY that was what was going on.

I can't believe this shiat is taken seriously.


That. Right there.
 
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