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(Mother Jones)   I know this is just a couple of drops in the old spittoon bucket but here are ten of the most absurd things Texas Republicans have said about abortion so far this year   (motherjones.com) divider line 269
    More: Interesting, R-Texas, abortions, 2nd amendment, David Dewhurst, pro-life  
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4685 clicks; posted to Politics » on 02 Jul 2013 at 10:52 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-02 09:58:54 AM
"In the emergency room they have what's called rape kits, where a woman can get cleaned out "

I don't even know where to begin with that one.
 
2013-07-02 10:09:25 AM
FTFA: "Wendy Davis's pink shoes offer good protection from biohazards and contaminated sharps found in the unregulated abortion shops she defends."

(e-tradebabyshockedface.jpg)

Can someone light Texas' oil on fire so all of Texas can burn?

/so glad I left
 
2013-07-02 10:30:04 AM
Gov. Rick Perry: Speaking to a national right-to-life conference on Friday, Perry lamented that Davis, who was raised by a single mother and had her first child at 19, hadn't drawn the proper lessons from her own life: "It is just unfortunate that she hasn't learned from her own example that every life must be given a chance to realize its full potential and that every life matters."

For some reason this one is the most offensive to me. He's using the woman's personal life to score a cheap political point. This is about as dishonest an argument as they come.
 
2013-07-02 10:37:29 AM
At this point the Republican party is starting to look like a troop of performance artists trying to one-up each other on the stupidest things things that can be said.
 
2013-07-02 10:47:47 AM
"

dickfreckle: Gov. Rick Perry: Speaking to a national right-to-life conference on Friday, Perry lamented that Davis, who was raised by a single mother and had her first child at 19, hadn't drawn the proper lessons from her own life: "It is just unfortunate that she hasn't learned from her own example that every life must be given a chance to realize its full potential and that every life matters."

For some reason this one is the most offensive to me. He's using the woman's personal life to score a cheap political point. This is about as dishonest an argument as they come.


For me, it's a tie between that quote, and the one where he calls the protestors "terrorists".
 
2013-07-02 10:53:40 AM

Marcus Aurelius: "In the emergency room they have what's called rape kits, where a woman can get cleaned out "

I don't even know where to begin with that one.


Not defending her asshattery but at least she can claim a principled stand against abortion.  The vast majority of pro-lifers I have met and known believe and openly state that life begins at conception but are ok with provisions for rape an incest as if there is a difference between a rape fetus and a broken condom fetus with respect to "life".
 
2013-07-02 10:57:10 AM
Thats a lot of derp.
 
2013-07-02 11:04:02 AM

impaler: At this point the Republican party is starting to look like a troop of performance artists trying to one-up each other on the stupidest things things that can be said.


Gohmert and Palin Challenge Accepted!
 
2013-07-02 11:04:41 AM
They had to significantly pare down the list.
 
2013-07-02 11:05:08 AM

UberDave: Marcus Aurelius: "In the emergency room they have what's called rape kits, where a woman can get cleaned out "

I don't even know where to begin with that one.

Not defending her asshattery but at least she can claim a principled stand against abortion.  The vast majority of pro-lifers I have met and known believe and openly state that life begins at conception but are ok with provisions for rape an incest as if there is a difference between a rape fetus and a broken condom fetus with respect to "life".


The basic argument is whether and under what circumstances the law should force a pregnant woman to stay pregnant until nature runs its course.  People's opinions about what the woman "deserves" get mixed into it.  Some people are sincere in a belief that the zygote is ensouled and needs to live but a lot of people also, or mainly, want to control women.
 
2013-07-02 11:05:13 AM
Hope Wendy Davis has a flak jacket to protect her from all the derp.
 
2013-07-02 11:06:13 AM
Texans are dumb? Color me ...um, what's the opposite of "shocked"?

Color me as standard. Completely whelmed.

// the last one about the guy who submitted a bill to regulate (or mandate) sonograms has no idea what the procedure entails or why it's done - ye gods
// I expect that they don't know what they're talking about, but to be that casual about revealing it, like "how was I supposed to find out?"
// YE. GODS.
// make the whole state a fertilizer plant, then toss in a match
 
2013-07-02 11:10:22 AM

sdd2000: impaler: At this point the Republican party is starting to look like a troop of performance artists trying to one-up each other on the stupidest things things that can be said.

Gohmert and Palin Challenge Accepted!



PALIN - GOHMERT 2016
DO IT FOR THE LULZ
 
2013-07-02 11:11:03 AM
So much stupid. Almost all of these are simply ideologues spewing their ideological bullshiat. They responses completely ignore reason, and basically serve to demonize the pro-choice movement as murderers. These idiots also forget abortion actually does address the rest of the major social issues they claim are damaging America.

I hate republicans. The modern Republican Party is so farking stupid.
 
2013-07-02 11:11:14 AM
State Rep. Sid Miller (R): to a question from a female lawmaker as to what his 2011 sonogram bill would actually entail: "Actually, I have never had a sonogram done on me, so I'm not familiar with the exact procedure-on the medical procedure, how that proceeds."

I don't think you'd necessarily need to have one done (obviously), but you really, really should know the details of any medical procedure you're going to thrust on another person.
 
2013-07-02 11:11:26 AM

Twist2005: Hope Wendy Davis has a flak jacket to protect her from all the derp.


I'd be more afraid of bullets from Operation Rescue fanatics.
 
2013-07-02 11:12:30 AM

God Is My Co-Pirate: For me, it's a tie between that quote, and the one where he calls the protestors "terrorists".


But when a teabagger shouts down a politician's speech at a Town Hall meeting, that's patriotism.
 
2013-07-02 11:14:57 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: sdd2000: impaler: At this point the Republican party is starting to look like a troop of performance artists trying to one-up each other on the stupidest things things that can be said.

Gohmert and Palin Challenge Accepted!


PALIN - GOHMERT 2016
DO IT FOR THE LULZ


The problem with most political jokes--They can get elected.
 
2013-07-02 11:17:08 AM
just to have it said (tin foil hat is on)

back when the economy was better
the pro abortion stance was not for the women
but to reduce the number of people that had in some way to be paid for

up till now - it remained as a good way to get people to feel they were involved in political decisions
but wasnt going to change

with the economy in the toilet
it now no longer makes any difference - but remains useful for people to feel they are involved in political decisions
yes on this subject you can now make a difference one way or the other
its no longer a protected decision

tin foil hat off
(but standing by)
 
2013-07-02 11:17:20 AM
Well, it's nice to see that Texas Republican women can be just as assholish as Texas Republican men.

You go girls!
 
2013-07-02 11:17:42 AM
FTFA: Donny Ferguson, aide to US Rep. Steve Stockman (R-Texas): "Wendy Davis's pink shoes offer good protection from biohazards and contaminated sharps found in the unregulated abortion shops she defends."

My favorite cognitive dissonance of the entire argument -- repeated here in PA with the Gosnell unregulated clinic horrors -- is that somehow banning abortion will also ban the unlicensed, unregulated clinics that truly put a woman's life at risk.

for bonus points Turd Ferguson here is the asstard who "proved" you can live on food stamps because he stopped at Dollar General. And then failed anyway.
 
2013-07-02 11:18:02 AM
Not funny, Subby! My brother is a Texas Republican. Out parents raised us to treat him just like everyone else. He even went to school with the norms.
 
2013-07-02 11:18:32 AM
A tweet about the 2nd Amendment in an abortion debate?  Seriously?

"Yeah we's gonna save lives bah killin' folks!"

That's what you sound like.
 
2013-07-02 11:18:53 AM

Nem Wan: UberDave: Marcus Aurelius: "In the emergency room they have what's called rape kits, where a woman can get cleaned out "

I don't even know where to begin with that one.

Not defending her asshattery but at least she can claim a principled stand against abortion.  The vast majority of pro-lifers I have met and known believe and openly state that life begins at conception but are ok with provisions for rape an incest as if there is a difference between a rape fetus and a broken condom fetus with respect to "life".

The basic argument is whether and under what circumstances the law should force a pregnant woman to stay pregnant until nature runs its course.  People's opinions about what the woman "deserves" get mixed into it.  Some people are sincere in a belief that the zygote is ensouled and needs to live but a lot of people also, or mainly, want to control women.


Even outside of the controlling women part, which is a major aspect of this discussion, the belief that life begins at conception is a fundamentally damaged viewpoint. Considering how common it can be for fertilized eggs to not attach and be flushed out, it's basically saying that philosophically there's been a steady holocaust going on and billions of souls not being born because of natural biology. It's a perspective that's either ignorant of or makes a massive horror out of life.
 
2013-07-02 11:19:30 AM
Our parents... (I gotta get a keyboard for this thing.)
 
2013-07-02 11:20:28 AM
The pro-life argument boils down to the following maxim: "Respect my penis."

Its another one of the last throes of patriarchy trying desperately to remain in control and relevant. Everything is about punishment and authoritarianism with these folks - they could give a shiat about what happens to these babies after they are born.

For an example of this in their mythology, you need look no further then the story of Abraham and his son in the Bible. The dude is about to carve up his own (living) son as a human sacrifice to god and no one has any problem with this - suddenly life is no longer "sacred". Abraham is a "righteous" dude, loved by god and honored in at least 3 major religions...

So to recap, terminating fetuses = bad, terminating living humans = ok.
 
2013-07-02 11:21:50 AM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: FTFA: Donny Ferguson, aide to US Rep. Steve Stockman (R-Texas): "Wendy Davis's pink shoes offer good protection from biohazards and contaminated sharps found in the unregulated abortion shops she defends."

My favorite cognitive dissonance of the entire argument -- repeated here in PA with the Gosnell unregulated clinic horrors -- is that somehow banning abortion will also ban the unlicensed, unregulated clinics that truly put a woman's life at risk.

for bonus points Turd Ferguson here is the asstard who "proved" you can live on food stamps because he stopped at Dollar General. And then failed anyway.


Not even that, but the fact that a single, high-profile case extrapolates to all of the clinics where this doesn't happen. You know, the sort of extrapolation that never, ever happens in larger scale examples of malfeasance in EVERY OTHER INDUSTRY EVER. If you think Gosnell is an indicator of how abortion clinics are run, you should think West, Texas is proof that all fertilizer companies need to be nailed to the wall.
 
2013-07-02 11:22:49 AM

Bloody William: Considering how common it can be for fertilized eggs to not attach and be flushed out, it's basically saying that philosophically there's been a steady holocaust going on and billions of souls not being born because of natural biology.


And not only that, but God's just fine with that situation.
 
2013-07-02 11:22:53 AM
The winning lawyer for Roe v Wade had her office just blocks from these clowns.

Since Texas has four cities in the top eleven of the US, these guys are digging up old school reactionaries from the sticks like they was potatoes cause cities add liberal to the water.
 
2013-07-02 11:25:34 AM

Elzar: So to recap, terminating fetuses = bad, terminating living humans = ok.


You can't see fetuses, they don't scream, cry, crap, barf, talk back or wreck your car, so they're the perfect vehicle for whatever flavor of fantasy you currently hold about childhood innocence.
 
2013-07-02 11:25:47 AM

Bloody William: Nem Wan: UberDave: Marcus Aurelius: "In the emergency room they have what's called rape kits, where a woman can get cleaned out "

I don't even know where to begin with that one.

Not defending her asshattery but at least she can claim a principled stand against abortion.  The vast majority of pro-lifers I have met and known believe and openly state that life begins at conception but are ok with provisions for rape an incest as if there is a difference between a rape fetus and a broken condom fetus with respect to "life".

The basic argument is whether and under what circumstances the law should force a pregnant woman to stay pregnant until nature runs its course.  People's opinions about what the woman "deserves" get mixed into it.  Some people are sincere in a belief that the zygote is ensouled and needs to live but a lot of people also, or mainly, want to control women.

Even outside of the controlling women part, which is a major aspect of this discussion, the belief that life begins at conception is a fundamentally damaged viewpoint. Considering how common it can be for fertilized eggs to not attach and be flushed out, it's basically saying that philosophically there's been a steady holocaust going on and billions of souls not being born because of natural biology. It's a perspective that's either ignorant of or makes a massive horror out of life.


It's similar to their opposition to gay rights.  Gay sex is icky therefore is must be outlawed.  Abortion is messy therefore it must be outlawed.
It's a reptilian brain response.  War is, apparently, heroic and grand - until one stops to think about it.
Outlawing abortion sounds noble until one stops to think through the implications.
 
2013-07-02 11:26:48 AM

Bloody William: Even outside of the controlling women part, which is a major aspect of this discussion, the belief that life begins at conception is a fundamentally damaged viewpoint. Considering how common it can be for fertilized eggs to not attach and be flushed out, it's basically saying that philosophically there's been a steady holocaust going on and billions of souls not being born because of natural biology. It's a perspective that's either ignorant of or makes a massive horror out of life.


I like to think it's a massive horror.  It puts my own atrocities in perspective, helps keep me grounded.  So what if I killed a clown last week and used his guts to restring tennis rackets at the health club where I work?  That's a public service compared to the number of babies Nature killed.

/I keed.  It's always a public service to kill a clown.
 
2013-07-02 11:28:27 AM

Elzar: The pro-life argument boils down to the following maxim: "Respect my penis."

Its another one of the last throes of patriarchy trying desperately to remain in control and relevant. Everything is about punishment and authoritarianism with these folks - they could give a shiat about what happens to these babies after they are born.

For an example of this in their mythology, you need look no further then the story of Abraham and his son in the Bible. The dude is about to carve up his own (living) son as a human sacrifice to god and no one has any problem with this - suddenly life is no longer "sacred". Abraham is a "righteous" dude, loved by god and honored in at least 3 major religions...

So to recap, terminating fetuses = bad, terminating living humans = ok.


No. no. no.  You just don't understand the glory of faith.  Also, the sacrament of communion is nothing at all like ritual cannibalism.
 
2013-07-02 11:28:44 AM

Marcus Aurelius: "In the emergency room they have what's called rape kits, where a woman can get cleaned out "

I don't even know where to begin with that one.


Try here
 
2013-07-02 11:28:55 AM
A count in the headline and it's not a sponsored link?  Hath our lengthy national nightmare endith?
 
2013-07-02 11:29:03 AM
30% were from women?
Also, some of them are retarded, some of them are just difference of opinion/taking a position Mother Jones disapproves of.
(For instance the threat to prosecute any media found to be inciting - that's not about abortions per se)

But mostly, these are straight up retardo-derp.
 
2013-07-02 11:30:05 AM
The very dumbest, most thoughtlessly cruel, bloodthirsty, selfish, cowardly thought that any Republican has, is exactly what All Republicans believe.

All Republicans only follow the most violent and cruel parts of the bible.

The version of Christianity that All Republicans believe in is nothing more than a death cult which makes the Aztecs look like peace-loving hippies.

All Republicans believe women are chattel to be used as incubators and slaves.

All Republicans want every fetus (especially those carried by poverty-stricken women) carried to full term, so they can be turned into corporate/military drones for the profit of good Republican Christians.

All Republicans believe the only real measure of God's love is the material wealth He allows you to accumulate.

All Republicans who say otherwise are cowards and liars.
 
2013-07-02 11:31:12 AM

Marcus Aurelius: "In the emergency room they have what's called rape kits, where a woman can get cleaned out "

I don't even know where to begin with that one.


not that I am defending this idiot... but don't some ERs give out Plan B if requested(and not prevented from giving it out by like minded twertwaffles)
So I assume that's what she means
but then again its hard to tell with the GOP morons.
 
2013-07-02 11:32:08 AM
I've seen most of these when they happened but the "I'm pro-life so they must be pro-death" comment really shocked me. I don't understand how someone so lacking in basic reasoning skills can be elected to a governing body.

That is mind blowing to me.
 
2013-07-02 11:33:44 AM

onzmadi: but don't some ERs give out Plan B if requested


Sure.

But the same way french fries are not a hamburger, a rape kit is not emergency contraception.
 
2013-07-02 11:34:51 AM

palelizard: State Rep. Sid Miller (R): to a question from a female lawmaker as to what his 2011 sonogram bill would actually entail: "Actually, I have never had a sonogram done on me, so I'm not familiar with the exact procedure-on the medical procedure, how that proceeds."

I don't think you'd necessarily need to have one done (obviously), but you really, really should know the details of any medical procedure you're going to thrust on another person.


Nevertheless, I suggest he have a trans-whatever-orifice-is-mostly-relevant-and-I-think-you-know-which-o ne-I-mean ultrasound procedure performed on him, just to "enlighten" him on the matter which he presumes he is qualified to legislate.

Friggin' ignorant hacks.

And my Texas in-laws gleefully pull the handle for these jackanapes every time.
 
2013-07-02 11:36:08 AM

cubic_spleen: The very dumbest, most thoughtlessly cruel, bloodthirsty, selfish, cowardly thought that any Republican has, is exactly what All Republicans believe.

All Republicans only follow the most violent and cruel parts of the bible.

The version of Christianity that All Republicans believe in is nothing more than a death cult which makes the Aztecs look like peace-loving hippies.

All Republicans believe women are chattel to be used as incubators and slaves.

All Republicans want every fetus (especially those carried by poverty-stricken women) carried to full term, so they can be turned into corporate/military drones for the profit of good Republican Christians.

All Republicans believe the only real measure of God's love is the material wealth He allows you to accumulate.

All Republicans who say otherwise are cowards and liars.


We hear so little from moderate republicans that it is easy to forget that they exist.  The RINO-calling/purity-test aspect of conservatism tends to relegate moderates to fighting primary battles against their own party.  We don't see that so much with democats.
 
2013-07-02 11:37:35 AM

Graffito: We hear so little from moderate republicans that it is easy to forget that they exist.


We hear so little from moderate republicans that I have to ask WHY the exist.
 
2013-07-02 11:38:50 AM

cubic_spleen: whiny little biatch.


The problem is that even if the rank and file don't feel that way, the people you elect to office do. Or can you prove me wrong by citing examples of Republican legislators making a stand for abortion rights?
 
2013-07-02 11:39:25 AM

theorellior: Bloody William: Considering how common it can be for fertilized eggs to not attach and be flushed out, it's basically saying that philosophically there's been a steady holocaust going on and billions of souls not being born because of natural biology.

And not only that, but God's just fine with that situation.


MORE SOULS FOR THE SOUL GOD!
 
2013-07-02 11:39:34 AM

Graffito: Elzar: The pro-life argument boils down to the following maxim: "Respect my penis."

Its another one of the last throes of patriarchy trying desperately to remain in control and relevant. Everything is about punishment and authoritarianism with these folks - they could give a shiat about what happens to these babies after they are born.

For an example of this in their mythology, you need look no further then the story of Abraham and his son in the Bible. The dude is about to carve up his own (living) son as a human sacrifice to god and no one has any problem with this - suddenly life is no longer "sacred". Abraham is a "righteous" dude, loved by god and honored in at least 3 major religions...

So to recap, terminating fetuses = bad, terminating living humans = ok.

No. no. no.  You just don't understand the gloryhole of faith.  Also, the sacrament of communion is ^more like ritual bukkake and nothing at all like ritual cannibalism.


FTFY.
 
2013-07-02 11:41:23 AM

dickfreckle: Gov. Rick Perry: Speaking to a national right-to-life conference on Friday, Perry lamented that Davis, who was raised by a single mother and had her first child at 19, hadn't drawn the proper lessons from her own life: "It is just unfortunate that she hasn't learned from her own example that every life must be given a chance to realize its full potential and that every life matters."

For some reason this one is the most offensive to me. He's using the woman's personal life to score a cheap political point. This is about as dishonest an argument as they come.


We should write Gov. Perry to legally require that every single mother should be required to attend law school.  That's the lesson I learned from State Sen. Davis's life.
 
2013-07-02 11:41:54 AM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: FTFA: Donny Ferguson, aide to US Rep. Steve Stockman (R-Texas): "Wendy Davis's pink shoes offer good protection from biohazards and contaminated sharps found in the unregulated abortion shops she defends."

My favorite cognitive dissonance of the entire argument -- repeated here in PA with the Gosnell unregulated clinic horrors -- is that somehow banning abortion will also ban the unlicensed, unregulated clinics that truly put a woman's life at risk.

for bonus points Turd Ferguson here is the asstard who "proved" you can live on food stamps because he stopped at Dollar General. And then failed anyway.




i1135.photobucket.com
 
2013-07-02 11:42:58 AM

Ambivalence: I've seen most of these when they happened but the "I'm pro-life so they must be pro-death" comment really shocked me. I don't understand how someone so lacking in basic reasoning skills can be elected to a governing body.

That is mind blowing to me.


George Carlin said, "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."
 
2013-07-02 11:43:10 AM
Let's just put it in words the GOP will understand:

"Women deserve the right to stand their ground against perceived parasitic invaders in their womb."
 
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