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(Buzzfeed)   Fifteen classic children's books banned in certain areas of the United States. Apparently, Winnie the Pooh is a Nazi and an insult to god since he's a talking animal   (buzzfeed.com) divider line 212
    More: Fail, Winnie-the-Pooh, Maurice Sendak, young girls, A.A. Milne, Diary of a Young Girl, United States, Oompa-Loompa, Green Egg  
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18786 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Jun 2013 at 12:11 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-30 12:02:10 AM  
12.  Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss
When: "Until as recently as 1991"
Why: Remember that time when Sam I Am tried to seduce his friend? Me neither. But the book was banned in California on accounts of "homosexual seduction."


[lolwot?]

It was also banned in China for "early Marxism" from 1965 until Dr. Seuss' death in 1991.

Wait, Green Eggs and Ham was too Marxist for China?

Is BuzzFeed the new Onion?
 
2013-06-30 12:02:51 AM  
I'm not a fan of banning books. But the Giving Tree needs to be burned and all records of its existence wiped off the face of the planet!
 
2013-06-30 12:13:21 AM  
This is why we don't have warp drive yet (nor should we be allowed to have it until we do something about these batsh*ts first).
 
2013-06-30 12:14:01 AM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: I'm not a fan of banning books. But the Giving Tree needs to be burned and all records of its existence wiped off the face of the planet!


Let me guess. You have an Ayn Rand RealDoll in your closet, don't you?
 
2013-06-30 12:15:31 AM  
3. Winnie-the-Pooh by A. A. Milne
When: 2006
Why: Talking animals are somehow considered an "insult to god,"


2006??? Oh for F*CK'S SAKE. Did they try to ban Disney movies, too?
 
2013-06-30 12:16:41 AM  
Talking animals? Just wait 'til these guys hear about the Chronicles of Narnia!
 
2013-06-30 12:17:46 AM  
 
2013-06-30 12:17:57 AM  

fusillade762: 3. Winnie-the-Pooh by A. A. Milne
When: 2006
Why: Talking animals are somehow considered an "insult to god,"

2006??? Oh for F*CK'S SAKE. Did they try to ban Disney movies, too?


Yes they have tried several times.
 
2013-06-30 12:19:49 AM  
I don't see what the big deal is. Isn't this the new "age of enlightenment" where we suppress, mock, or shame ideas that make us uncomfortable under the guise of creating a "safe place free from triggering events"? So we ban a few books. At least people's feelings won't be hurt.
 
2013-06-30 12:20:08 AM  
yoy can't argue with the logic shown there.......realy, don't bother
 
2013-06-30 12:20:27 AM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: I'm not a fan of banning books. But the Giving Tree needs to be burned and all records of its existence wiped off the face of the planet!


takingtree.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-06-30 12:20:35 AM  
Banned? As in they're illegal for sale and all copies within the state have bee destroyed???

That's awful.
 
2013-06-30 12:21:24 AM  
From  Numbers 22:28:

And the LORD opened the mouth of the donkey, and she said to Balaam, What have I done to you, that you have smitten me these three times?  Looks like God is Ok with talking animals.  So now what?
 
2013-06-30 12:21:24 AM  
Kiss my ass, copypaste buzzfeed sponsored partner bullshiat
 
2013-06-30 12:22:22 AM  
If animals that can talk are an insult to Gerd, then what is Sarah Palin?
 
2013-06-30 12:22:50 AM  

WhippingBoy: I don't see what the big deal is. Isn't this the new "age of enlightenment" where we suppress, mock, or shame ideas that make us uncomfortable under the guise of creating a "safe place free from triggering events"? So we ban a few books. At least people's feelings won't be hurt.


When the concept of "hate speech" gained legitimacy, I knew free speech (as a philosophical idea, not a constitutional right) was next.
 
2013-06-30 12:23:25 AM  
The best one is:

15. Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What do you see? by Bill Martin, Jr.
When: 2010
Why: The Texas State Board of Education briefly banned this picture book after confusing its author, Bill Martin, Jr., with philosopher Bill Martin, author of 'Ethical Marxism: The Categorical Imperative of Liberation.'

Nothing like a little neo-McCarthyism to start your day.
 
2013-06-30 12:23:56 AM  
Not surprised The Lorax was on the list. Somebody in the US actually wrote a counter kid's book about a talking tree encouraging logging and stuff.
 
2013-06-30 12:23:58 AM  

scruffynerfherder: From  Numbers 22:28:

And the LORD opened the mouth of the donkey, and she said to Balaam, What have I done to you, that you have smitten me these three times?  Looks like God is Ok with talking animals.  So now what?


And the Jews boiled Balaam to death in a vat of boiling semen.
 
2013-06-30 12:24:23 AM  
FTFA: Talking animals are somehow considered an "insult to god,"

Numbers 22:28 And the LORD opened the mouth of the ass, and she said unto Balaam, What have I done unto thee, that thou hast smitten me these three times? 22:29 And Balaam said unto the ass, Because thou hast mocked me: I would there were a sword in mine hand, for now would I kill thee.22:30 And the ass said unto Balaam, Am not I thine ass, upon which thou hast ridden ever since I was thine unto this day? was I ever wont to do so unto thee? And he said, Nay.
 
2013-06-30 12:24:23 AM  

dbirchall: Talking animals? Just wait 'til these guys hear about the Chronicles of Narnia!


Or how about the Bible, Numbers 22. Baalam and his talking donkey. Godwined again.

upload.wikimedia.org

 
2013-06-30 12:26:12 AM  

Lee Jackson Beauregard: Numbers 22:28 ...And he said, Nay.


Was expecting more of a "Heehaw", but okay.
 
2013-06-30 12:27:05 AM  
Topless chick: Someone was looking too hard.

I'm too young, and sans spawn, to haven't been exposed to the Giving Tree. Although I know of the Taking Tree due to the Grimm Adventures of Billy and Mandy.

Winnie The Pooh has other objections than what's listed. Really going out on a limb for the ones listed.

Ehhhh, maybe "ass" is a little much for a kids book. At least in a class setting.

No exposure to Harriet The Spy. By the time I was in that age bracket I was reading Alan Dean Foster and Asimov.

Never read Anne Frank. Perhaps not below middle school, but I've only been to a bad date at a holocaust museum.

No exposure to Bridge to Terabithia.

No exposure to original Alice in Wonderland. Although I'm told it's really about drugs. I have an early print around here somewhere.

No exposure to Where The Wild Things Are. I'm always vigilant for a first print in DJ, worth about $25k.

Well, The Lorax was about unbridled deforestation.

Green Eggs and Ham? Really? You're kidding me.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory isn't that well written. It was done by a guy damaged after being shot down in WWII.

I thought Wizard of Oz was about economics.

Brown Bear has a stupid objection. Invalid.
 
2013-06-30 12:27:41 AM  
upload.wikimedia.org

There was a big hubbub in the town were I grew up on the 90's because a group of fundies wanted to remove this book from the grade school. Well they didn't succeed that day but more and more of them started moving in and farking with the school system. In 10 years the school system went from being one of the best in the country to one of the worst in the state.
 
2013-06-30 12:27:49 AM  
Why: All public libraries in Chicago the book because of its "ungodly" influence "for depicting women in strong leadership roles." In 1957, the Detroit Public Library banned the book for having "no value for children of today."

We could ban books for having no value to kids? May be needed for the Twilight series.
 
2013-06-30 12:28:04 AM  
People who ban children's books are completely wacko.

Masturbation in Alice in Wonderland? I've read that book many times and I've yet to find anything sexual.

The political and religious lunacy goes without saying.

But I suppose that you could find The Lorax and The Giving Tree anti-chain saw. But who speaks for the trees, people? Who speaks for the trees?
 
2013-06-30 12:28:29 AM  
Winnie the Pooh is definitely gay, and maybe into bestiality, too.
 
2013-06-30 12:29:41 AM  

Lee Jackson Beauregard: FTFA: Talking animals are somehow considered an "insult to god,"

Numbers 22:28 And the LORD opened the mouth of the ass, and she said unto Balaam, What have I done unto thee, that thou hast smitten me these three times? 22:29 And Balaam said unto the ass, Because thou hast mocked me: I would there were a sword in mine hand, for now would I kill thee.22:30 And the ass said unto Balaam, Am not I thine ass, upon which thou hast ridden ever since I was thine unto this day? was I ever wont to do so unto thee? And he said, Nay neigh.

 
2013-06-30 12:29:49 AM  
Huh.  I figured that The Adventures of Huckelberry Finn would be on the list.  That book hurt MY feelin's, 'cuz it had so many words I had to read!
 
2013-06-30 12:30:51 AM  
FTFA11. The Lorax by Dr. Seuss When: 1989 Why: A California school district banned the book and claimed that it "criminalized the foresting industry" and would thus persuade children against logging.

Hey waitafugginminute.  The public schools are full of tree-hugging America-hating libruls.  Especially in California!
 
2013-06-30 12:30:53 AM  

whatshisname: Winnie the Pooh is definitely gay, and maybe into bestiality, too.


I'm pretty sure Tigger is offensive to black people because it sounds so close to a racial slur and his spastic actions imply that blacks are wacky and all over the place.

Owl for all I know justifies police state fascism.
 
2013-06-30 12:31:28 AM  

doglover: The Stealth Hippopotamus: I'm not a fan of banning books. But the Giving Tree needs to be burned and all records of its existence wiped off the face of the planet!

[takingtree.files.wordpress.com image 557x720]


Whatever works. Just so long as the boy turns into a man that can take care of himself and doesn't end up broke and alone sitting on the used up corpse of his only friend.

And didn't it bother anyone else that the boy always demanded things and never bothered to say thank you? My boys (then 6 & 3) pointed that out to me.
 
2013-06-30 12:32:07 AM  
Banning books? Have we learned nothing for Footloose?
 
2013-06-30 12:32:33 AM  
Want to have some fun?

Whenever some godbot opens his or her pie hole and starts banning books and whatnot, remind them that no one in America is obligated to give a shiat whether their god is happy or sad.

Then, explain freedom.

Most times, you can actually see and hear the physical manifestation of their cognitive dissonance as the gears of their poor brains start tossing their cogs, and they realize they're not actually in a church where those stupid things are important.
 
2013-06-30 12:33:07 AM  
I was legit shocked by #1. I need to find me a 1st edition on eBay. :P
 
2013-06-30 12:33:13 AM  

therecksays: Banning books? Have we learned nothing for Footloose?


for = from

/facepalm
 
2013-06-30 12:33:27 AM  
So; christianity, political correctness, and modern feminism. Fark all three.

Also:  Talking animals are somehow considered an "insult to god," resulting in this book's banning throughout random parts of the United States.

NSFW.

/not able to post a perfectly relevant pic
//in a thread about censorship on fark because
///someone, somewhere, will be offended
////because boobies
//head assplode
 
2013-06-30 12:34:16 AM  

brantgoose: People who ban children's books are completely wacko.

Masturbation in Alice in Wonderland? I've read that book many times and I've yet to find anything sexual.

The political and religious lunacy goes without saying.

But I suppose that you could find The Lorax and The Giving Tree anti-chain saw. But who speaks for the trees, people? Who speaks for the trees?


Yeah I dont even think Zombie Freud could find most of the undertones claimed.
 
2013-06-30 12:34:19 AM  
Wait, Charlotte's Web was banned in 2006?! For talking animals?! Is there even a dime left in Kansas's education system?
 
2013-06-30 12:35:01 AM  

ongbok: [upload.wikimedia.org image 175x305]

There was a big hubbub in the town were I grew up on the 90's because a group of fundies wanted to remove this book from the grade school. Well they didn't succeed that day but more and more of them started moving in and farking with the school system. In 10 years the school system went from being one of the best in the country to one of the worst in the state.


I bet it was the same SOBs that went after Harry Potter.

I say anything that can get a pre-teen to read a 500 page book is a good thing.
 
2013-06-30 12:36:19 AM  

WizardofToast: Is there even a dime left in Kansas's education system?


No, they lost it all trying to defend their decision to teach creationism in science class.
 
2013-06-30 12:36:59 AM  
I wonder how many people who are shocked by this list are as interested in Paula Deen's public flaying.
 
2013-06-30 12:37:10 AM  
The AA Milne Nazi thing is kind of funny, since he wrote many anti PG Wodehouse screeds for living in Europe and being (oblivious) to the Nazis at the time.  I can kind of believe Wodehouse sort of just bumbling around and getting his money from whatever bank and not being terribly worried about politics.
 
2013-06-30 12:37:15 AM  
People who ban things like this are the only people who I would murder and feel no guilt.
 
2013-06-30 12:37:51 AM  
Talking snakes?

Wait a minute, I'm willing to sacrifice these works. The very same objections could be used for banning the bible. It would be worth it.
 
2013-06-30 12:38:20 AM  

whatshisname: Winnie the Pooh is definitely gay, and maybe into bestiality, too.


And Tigger to.
 
2013-06-30 12:38:44 AM  

wildcardjack: Topless chick: Someone was looking too hard.

I'm too young, and sans spawn, to haven't been exposed to the Giving Tree. Although I know of the Taking Tree due to the Grimm Adventures of Billy and Mandy.

Winnie The Pooh has other objections than what's listed. Really going out on a limb for the ones listed.

Ehhhh, maybe "ass" is a little much for a kids book. At least in a class setting.

No exposure to Harriet The Spy. By the time I was in that age bracket I was reading Alan Dean Foster and Asimov.

Never read Anne Frank. Perhaps not below middle school, but I've only been to a bad date at a holocaust museum.

No exposure to Bridge to Terabithia.

No exposure to original Alice in Wonderland. Although I'm told it's really about drugs. I have an early print around here somewhere.

No exposure to Where The Wild Things Are. I'm always vigilant for a first print in DJ, worth about $25k.

Well, The Lorax was about unbridled deforestation.

Green Eggs and Ham? Really? You're kidding me.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory isn't that well written. It was done by a guy damaged after being shot down in WWII.

I thought Wizard of Oz was about economics.

Brown Bear has a stupid objection. Invalid.


Is there a good date to a holocaust museum?
 
2013-06-30 12:40:27 AM  

doglover: The Stealth Hippopotamus: I'm not a fan of banning books. But the Giving Tree needs to be burned and all records of its existence wiped off the face of the planet!

[takingtree.files.wordpress.com image 557x720]


What about this version?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hyFCxGM7x1A
 
2013-06-30 12:40:36 AM  

Uncle Tractor: /not able to post a perfectly relevant pic
//in a thread about censorship on fark because
///someone, somewhere, will be offended
////because boobies
//head assplode


Not able to name a certain character in Huckleberry Finn, either.

www.skullbunnie.com
 
2013-06-30 12:43:17 AM  

Bumblefark: Uncle Tractor: /not able to post a perfectly relevant pic
//in a thread about censorship on fark because
///someone, somewhere, will be offended
////because boobies
//head assplode

Not able to name a certain character in Huckleberry Finn, either.


nubian Jim?
 
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