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(Kansas City)   "We never intended to offend anyone," says editor about cover featuring buxom Blessed Virgin Mary in bikini, sipping on margarita, and shirtless cowboy with nipple ring   (kansascity.com) divider line 95
    More: Unlikely, Blessed Virgin Mary, Holy Mother, Santa Fe Reporter  
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11857 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jun 2013 at 5:36 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-29 08:02:01 PM  

Mirandized: How would anyone take this to be the Virgin Mary? Was it referred to in the story? I certainly saw no reference on the cover -- just some chick in a bikini.


Jesus, EXACTLY. Lighten the f*ck up, people.
 
2013-06-29 08:04:45 PM  
lh5.googleusercontent.com
 
2013-06-29 08:08:45 PM  
Cartoon Virgin Mary is a boob job away from being pretty hot.

/B-cups are such a waste
 
2013-06-29 08:12:56 PM  

Bildo: Cartoon Virgin Mary is a boob job away from being pretty hot.

/B-cups are such a waste


More than a mouthful's a waste.
 
2013-06-29 08:14:53 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: At least they didn't have Mohammed in a bikini.

/Shiatstorm from their fanatics would be nuclear


Largely because it wouldn't make any sense. What would that be a reference to?
 
2013-06-29 08:15:42 PM  

oren0: At least it's a virgin margarita.

/ hangs head in shame


Without reading the article, my best guess would be the Virgin of Guadalupe is drinking a Cowboy BuddhaMargarita from the Adobe Bar in the Taos Inn. If you're not used to the elevation and drink 2 or 3 of those you are apt to see some weird stuff.
 
2013-06-29 08:15:42 PM  

SpiderQueenDemon: See, if it were a great big 'beach party' drawing with several other religious figures depicted and no behavior which is objectionable to any faith (no alcohol, for example,) then you could just say "We have a Unitarian on the staff," and it'd be shrugged off. Ganesha and Jesus playing beach volleyball against Krishna and Confucius, the prophet Mohammed sunning himself with his face obscured by a big umbrella and a pet cat on the towel with him, Pope John Paul II sharing sunscreen with Gandhi, the Blessed Mother and Kali handing out popsicles together...that'd be classy and kind of awesome.

Plus, you could draw a lifeguard rescuing L.Ron Hubbard in water-wings.


I realize this is off topic, but it needs to be said as often as possible: people are stupid. Stupid people follow and hand their children off to mind numbingly stupid things that absolutely destroy their children. Annoyed by southern Pentacostals or Mormons of Muslim, find a Scientologist and spend 10 minutes with them.

Scientologist are walking, talkIng sub-human filth. They are garbage, they......

Aw Fark it, if you don't understand this basic caveat you deserve what's coming for you. It's 2013 people. STOP this nonsense.
 
2013-06-29 08:18:01 PM  
BarkingUnicorn:
The Lady of Guadalupe is a tangible icon of purportedly miraculous origin, similar to the Shroud of Turin.

Although December was very late in the growing season for flowers to bloom, Juan Diego found at the usually barren hilltop Castilian roses, not native to Mexico, which the Virgin arranged in his peasant Tilma cloak.

Uhh... God? I realize you created the universe and everything, but invasive species are pretty bad.
 
2013-06-29 08:18:52 PM  
BarkingUnicorn:

"More than a mouthful's a waste."

I must have a gigantic mouth
 
2013-06-29 08:20:46 PM  
Mary looks good after a couple of kids.  She should show it off.  You go girl.
 
2013-06-29 08:25:50 PM  
It's funny ... all the outraged people sound just like this guy:

2.bp.blogspot.com

/it is an outrage
//the christian taliban will get you!!!
 
2013-06-29 08:41:36 PM  
How dare they depict Mary as a human who could ever be relevant in modern society.
 
2013-06-29 08:44:21 PM  

Mirandized: How would anyone take this to be the Virgin Mary? Was it referred to in the story? I certainly saw no reference on the cover -- just some chick in a bikini.


It could have been a drawing of a young Mother Teresa, you know before she became a hamster in a tea towel.
 
2013-06-29 08:47:35 PM  

advex101: Mary looks good after a couple of kids.  She should show it off.  You go girl.


If you take the position that Jesus had siblings, Mary gave birth to five boys (Jesus, James, Joses, Judas, and Simon) and an several girls who aren't named or enumerated.

The Catholic position, that these were cousins and not siblings, hinges on the ambiguity of the Greek words "adelpho" and "adelphe."  They can mean blood brothers and sisters; cousins; the entire Jewish people; and other sorts of relations.
 
2013-06-29 08:51:21 PM  
Came here to say something snarky about random bikini girl, but was instead impressed by the Fark Papist/art history braintrust figuring out that it was supposed to be the Virgin Mary of Guadelupe.  So uh well done, everyone.

Also impressed by the Grilled Cheese Greta Garbo.  Is there somewhere I can place an order for a Grilled Cheese Vilma Bánky?  I'm ah... asking for a friend.
 
2013-06-29 08:52:03 PM  

Wall_of_Doodoo: SpiderQueenDemon: See, if it were a great big 'beach party' drawing with several other religious figures depicted and no behavior which is objectionable to any faith (no alcohol, for example,) then you could just say "We have a Unitarian on the staff," and it'd be shrugged off. Ganesha and Jesus playing beach volleyball against Krishna and Confucius, the prophet Mohammed sunning himself with his face obscured by a big umbrella and a pet cat on the towel with him, Pope John Paul II sharing sunscreen with Gandhi, the Blessed Mother and Kali handing out popsicles together...that'd be classy and kind of awesome.

Plus, you could draw a lifeguard rescuing L.Ron Hubbard in water-wings.

I realize this is off topic, but it needs to be said as often as possible: people are stupid. Stupid people follow and hand their children off to mind numbingly stupid things that absolutely destroy their children. Annoyed by southern Pentacostals or Mormons of Muslim, find a Scientologist and spend 10 minutes with them.

Scientologist are walking, talkIng sub-human filth. They are garbage, they......

Aw Fark it, if you don't understand this basic caveat you deserve what's coming for you. It's 2013 people. STOP this nonsense.


I find it hard to take seriously the people who urge us not to take religion seriously when the former take religion so seriously.
 
2013-06-29 08:58:15 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: Bildo: Cartoon Virgin Mary is a boob job away from being pretty hot.

/B-cups are such a waste

More than a mouthful's a waste.


I'll happily take the big mouthfuls that you don't want, as I sincerely don't mind not being able to get an entire boob in my mouth at once. No wastage, trust me.
 
2013-06-29 09:02:57 PM  

John Buck 41: BarkingUnicorn: Bildo: Cartoon Virgin Mary is a boob job away from being pretty hot.

/B-cups are such a waste

More than a mouthful's a waste.

I'll happily take the big mouthfuls that you don't want, as I sincerely don't mind not being able to get an entire boob in my mouth at once. No wastage, trust me.


Meh.  To each his own.  I don't play with my food.  I certainly don't rub my dick in it.
 
2013-06-29 09:17:25 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: John Buck 41: BarkingUnicorn: Bildo: Cartoon Virgin Mary is a boob job away from being pretty hot.

/B-cups are such a waste

More than a mouthful's a waste.

I'll happily take the big mouthfuls that you don't want, as I sincerely don't mind not being able to get an entire boob in my mouth at once. No wastage, trust me.

Meh.  To each his own.  I don't play with my food.   I certainly don't rub my dick in it.


I'm not surprised. It's pointless/impossible to do that to small boobs. But like you said, to each his own.
 
2013-06-29 09:38:31 PM  
Oh sure, but no one finds it offensive when The Flying Spaghetti Monster is selling mattresses for Presidents Day.  Double standard, I tell ya.
 
2013-06-29 10:14:47 PM  

Gyrfalcon: Yeah, you did.

You might as well own it. Whether it is or is not offensive is open to debate; but you were totally hoping SOMEONE would be offended. Otherwise, why do it?


This. They certainly weren't trying to draw in the diverse people of the city who venerate the Virgin Mary.
 
2013-06-29 10:18:19 PM  
If you ever claim to "be offended" then you're likely a moron whose opinion doesn't matter anyway.
 
2013-06-29 10:20:16 PM  

Mirandized: How would anyone take this to be the Virgin Mary? Was it referred to in the story? I certainly saw no reference on the cover -- just some chick in a bikini.


This
 
2013-06-29 10:21:20 PM  

OccamsWhiskers: How dare they depict Mary as a human who could ever be relevant in modern society.


That's my take. I saw it as being playful, maybe a bit of an homage and a not-quite-as-subtle-as-they-thought reference to the VMoG. People who are honestly offended by it need to take the stick out of their asses and get over themselves unless they like being compared to mad, middle eastern, Sharia Law-touting asshats who riot over cartoons of their prophet in which case they may proceed.
 
2013-06-29 10:38:59 PM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: If you ever claim to "be offended" then you're likely a moron whose opinion doesn't matter anyway.


That conveniently gives you free rein to be a dick to people, doesn't it?
 
2013-06-29 10:42:02 PM  

quatchi: OccamsWhiskers: How dare they depict Mary as a human who could ever be relevant in modern society.

That's my take. I saw it as being playful, maybe a bit of an homage and a not-quite-as-subtle-as-they-thought reference to the VMoG. People who are honestly offended by it need to take the stick out of their asses and get over themselves unless they like being compared to mad, middle eastern, Sharia Law-touting asshats who riot over cartoons of their prophet in which case they may proceed.


Kill yourselves, both of you.  It's your only hope of improvement.
 
2013-06-29 10:47:02 PM  
Hail Murray?
Full of grease.
Time to make the doughnuts.
 
2013-06-29 10:49:36 PM  

zenobia: Gyrfalcon: Yeah, you did.

You might as well own it. Whether it is or is not offensive is open to debate; but you were totally hoping SOMEONE would be offended. Otherwise, why do it?

This. They certainly weren't trying to draw in the diverse people of the city who venerate the Virgin Mary.


Is tequila somehow a vulgar substance in Catholicism? Are virgins not permitted to get a suntan?

It's mildly blasphemous, sure, but "degrading?" It's not like she was being depicted as a scat-muncher or anything.
 
2013-06-29 10:50:29 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: quatchi: OccamsWhiskers: How dare they depict Mary as a human who could ever be relevant in modern society.

That's my take. I saw it as being playful, maybe a bit of an homage and a not-quite-as-subtle-as-they-thought reference to the VMoG. People who are honestly offended by it need to take the stick out of their asses and get over themselves unless they like being compared to mad, middle eastern, Sharia Law-touting asshats who riot over cartoons of their prophet in which case they may proceed.

Kill yourselves, both of you.  It's your only hope of improvement.


Catholicism forbids suicide.
 
2013-06-29 10:51:30 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: Arthur Jumbles: [media.kansascity.com image 430x550]
Why does anyone think this is the Virgin Mary? Is the kid with the ice cream cone Jesus?

0/10  Nobody in the Western world is so unfamiliar with Catholic iconography.


Well, me. Is it the towel?
 
2013-06-29 10:52:18 PM  
Who cares
 
2013-06-29 10:52:26 PM  
Ah, now I see the several other posts which would have answered my question, had I the time to look through all ... 50 posts.
 
2013-06-29 11:01:18 PM  

Princip's Sandwich: Arthur Jumbles: BarkingUnicorn: Arthur Jumbles: [media.kansascity.com image 430x550]
Why does anyone think this is the Virgin Mary? Is the kid with the ice cream cone Jesus?

0/10  Nobody in the Western world is so unfamiliar with Catholic iconography.

[www.theworkofgod.org image 278x368]
You're right, the similarity is shocking!

[img1.loadtr.com image 559x1095]
There you go.


I'd finger her and jihad all over her titties...
 
2013-06-29 11:04:17 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: Kill yourselves, both of you.  It's your only hope of improvement.


Wait, are you actually seriously offended by this?

I have to know in order to figure out whether to laugh harder or not.

Hickory-smoked: Catholicism forbids suicide.


Maybe he was coming at it from a Buddhist/reincarnation angle whereby I would reincarnate into some higher form of life after suiciding?

Who knows? Maybe I'd come back as a Redditor...

*ducks*
 
2013-06-29 11:06:06 PM  
Lady Madonna, baby at your breast...

...oh, *that's* how she managed to feed the rest.
 
2013-06-29 11:11:53 PM  

quatchi: BarkingUnicorn: Kill yourselves, both of you.  It's your only hope of improvement.

Wait, are you actually seriously offended by this?

I have to know in order to figure out whether to laugh harder or not.


Not offended, just have your best interest at heart.  Death can only be an improvement over spewing bullshiat like that..
 
2013-06-29 11:20:26 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: For those who know nothing of Mexican culture:

The Lady of Guadalupe is a tangible icon of purportedly miraculous origin, similar to the Shroud of Turin.  It is highly revered among Mexican Catholics, and there are quite of those in New Mexico.

The Santa Fe Reporter's "creative" staff and editor surely knew this.  Running that cover was a dick move, and they deserve all the Internet hate that they get.


I have to agree. Here, after seeing the posts about the source it's pretty obvious this was a dick move.

For all the "you must tolerate my dickery" assholes here that say otherwise. fark YOU. This was a thorough dick move and it's amazingly obvious if you know what to look for. They broke the single Wheaton Rule, folks. Don't be a dick.

And thus the people responsible should be cock punched repeatedly until they each give a genuine apology, admitting they knew what they were doing and that they sincerely apologize and promise to NEVER do it again.

The first rule to getting along is this;  treat others as you'd wish to be treated. Simple as that. Is it THAT farking hard to understand? Is it?! They knew that this would upset people and offend other human beings... and still chose to do it... it's a dick thing to do. Period.

If you expect others to respect you ... if you don't want others to think you're a dick... you don't intentionally disrespect others.  Is that so farking hard to get?
 
2013-06-29 11:48:48 PM  

Bell-fan: The first rule to getting along is this;  treat others as you'd wish to be treated.


I'm sorry, but the Golden Rule is the worst advice ever given.  It is an imposition of your will upon another. It has resulted in many atrocities, like stealing children from their families and forbidding them to speak their native languages because hey, *I* would want to be rescued from savages.  Less dramatically, who are you to say whether a guy should have a meal or a drink?

Treat others as they wish to be treated.  That means you have to ask them how they wish to be treated.

if you don't want others to think you're a dick... you don't intentionally disrespect others.

In that, we agree completely.

For all the "you must tolerate my dickery" assholes here that say otherwise. fark YOU.

And that.
 
2013-06-30 01:11:23 AM  
BarkingUnicorn: quatchi: BarkingUnicorn: Kill yourselves, both of you.  It's your only hope of improvement.

Wait, are you actually seriously offended by this?

I have to know in order to figure out whether to laugh harder or not.


Not offended, just have your best interest at heart.  Death can only be an improvement over spewing bullshiat like that..

You sound easily offended.

Anyone who thinks this was intentionally disrespectful in a "designed to cause outrage" way is an idiot.

Anyone who is genuinely offended is an even bigger idiot.
 
2013-06-30 04:36:04 AM  
I don't see what's so offensive about this.  There is nothing in that image to indicate Mary Mother of Christ, she looks like a woman with a towel hanging off of her head, I would not have even noticed any resemblance has someone else not pointed it out to me.  Also, Mary Mother of Christ is not any more holy or sacred than any other human being.
 
2013-06-30 07:46:33 AM  

BarkingUnicorn: Arthur Jumbles: [media.kansascity.com image 430x550]
Why does anyone think this is the Virgin Mary? Is the kid with the ice cream cone Jesus?

0/10  Nobody in the Western world is so unfamiliar with Catholic iconography.


I'm Methodist.. I see nothing to indicate who she might be.
 
2013-06-30 09:05:40 AM  
Oh, Christ. Get over it. I think it's awesome
 
2013-06-30 03:45:30 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: Arthur Jumbles: BarkingUnicorn: Arthur Jumbles: [media.kansascity.com image 430x550]
Why does anyone think this is the Virgin Mary? Is the kid with the ice cream cone Jesus?

0/10  Nobody in the Western world is so unfamiliar with Catholic iconography.

[www.theworkofgod.org image 278x368]
You're right, the similarity is shocking!

New Mexicans prefer the VM of Guadalupe

[www.scborromeo.org image 252x466][media.kansascity.com image 430x550]

Blue cloak - check
Radiant aura - check
Standing on crescent moon - check


She's also surrounded by 12 stars.
Rev 12:1 A great sign appeared in heaven: a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet and a crown of twelve stars on her head.
 
2013-06-30 08:30:24 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: quatchi: OccamsWhiskers: How dare they depict Mary as a human who could ever be relevant in modern society.

That's my take. I saw it as being playful, maybe a bit of an homage and a not-quite-as-subtle-as-they-thought reference to the VMoG. People who are honestly offended by it need to take the stick out of their asses and get over themselves unless they like being compared to mad, middle eastern, Sharia Law-touting asshats who riot over cartoons of their prophet in which case they may proceed.

Kill yourselves, both of you.  It's your only hope of improvement.


You've made a thoughtful and soundly argued point. Perhaps I did overreact.
 
2013-06-30 08:46:42 PM  
Holy Mary, mother of god! Nice boobs!
 
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