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(The Onion)   Stanley Cup shot 11 times during Chicago Blackhawks victory parade   (theonion.com) divider line 42
    More: Satire, Blackhawks, Stanley Cup, victory parade, Blackhawks victory  
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1921 clicks; posted to Sports » on 28 Jun 2013 at 7:46 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



42 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-06-28 06:51:02 PM
Hahahaha, it's funny because Chicago really is a violent cesspool.
 
2013-06-28 08:03:45 PM

Popcorn Johnny: Hahahaha, it's funny because Chicago really is a violent cesspool.


Chicago was beautiful today.  Detroit sucks.
 
jgi
2013-06-28 08:07:17 PM

TJWitz: Popcorn Johnny: Hahahaha, it's funny because Chicago really is a violent cesspool.

Chicago was beautiful today.  Detroit sucks.


This exchange is funny to me because I live in Chicago and it doesn't seem bad at all. But I'm from Detroit.

Always a Wings fan, though.
 
2013-06-28 08:13:19 PM
If any team is going to be obliterated from the Cup, the 1999 Dallas Stars would be my pick as well.

/Not bitter.
 
2013-06-28 08:23:51 PM
Save % of .440, but it still stopped more shots this season than Tim Thomas.
 
2013-06-28 08:33:57 PM

TJWitz: Popcorn Johnny: Hahahaha, it's funny because Chicago really is a violent cesspool.

Chicago was beautiful today.  Detroit sucks.


I took a friend to the parade and on a Ytterbium tour of the city, on the train home now. Today was perfection.
 
2013-06-28 08:34:47 PM

jgi: TJWitz: Popcorn Johnny: Hahahaha, it's funny because Chicago really is a violent cesspool.

Chicago was beautiful today.  Detroit sucks.

This exchange is funny to me because I live in Chicago and it doesn't seem bad at all. But I'm from Detroit.

Always a Wings fan, though.


"Detroit sucks" was obligatory for PJ's continuing saga of butthurt.
 
2013-06-28 08:43:37 PM
But guns are illegal in Chicago!

/oblig
 
2013-06-28 08:43:52 PM

Popcorn Johnny: Hahahaha, it's funny because Chicago really is a violent cesspool.


Thanks again for helping us to victory with your 'predictions'.

www.bostonglobe.com
 
2013-06-28 08:50:30 PM

jgi: This exchange is funny to me because I live in Chicago and it doesn't seem bad at all. But I'm from Detroit.


Like anywhere else in the world, it's about neighborhood.  Even the best places have bad neighborhoods and the worst places have good ones.
 
2013-06-28 08:57:12 PM

HaveBeerWillTravel: If any team is going to be obliterated from the Cup, the 1999 Dallas Stars would be my pick as well.

/Not bitter.


Yeah, why do I think this piece was written by a Sabres fan?
 
2013-06-28 09:07:41 PM

TJWitz: Popcorn Johnny: Hahahaha, it's funny because Chicago really is a violent cesspool.

Chicago was beautiful today.  Detroit sucks.


Of course, PJ already knows that, having fled to Kansas City.
 
2013-06-28 09:17:15 PM
I've got 10 victims this weekend in my 'weekend gunshot victim' pool.
 
2013-06-28 09:17:39 PM
Took the family down for the parade today.  Good God there were a lot of people downtown.
 
2013-06-28 09:26:37 PM

Tyrone Biggums: Took the family down for the parade today.  Good God there were a lot of people downtown.


Yup - same here.  Was hoping to make it to the rally site, but we only made it as far as the parade route near the fountain.  So we got to see the players and the Cup, but that was it.

I can't believe how many people were there today; I really want to see the crowd numbers once they get an estimate.
 
2013-06-28 10:08:13 PM

Fubegra: TJWitz: Popcorn Johnny: Hahahaha, it's funny because Chicago really is a violent cesspool.

Chicago was beautiful today.  Detroit sucks.

Of course, PJ already knows that, having fled to Kansas City.


I'd move back to the Metro - Detroit area in a heartbeat if I found a good job. If I don't, I'll wait until I retire.

By the way Kansas City is a cool little big city.
 
2013-06-28 10:16:33 PM

Popcorn Johnny: Hahahaha, it's funny because Chicago really is a violent cesspool.


I see someone hasn't been to St. Louis.

/laughs at the "crime" problem in Chicago
 
2013-06-28 10:29:54 PM

whistleridge: Yeah, why do I think this piece was written by a Sabres fan?


If it wasn't, the '99 Stars were an awfully random team to pick as the one totally obliterated from the Cup.
 
2013-06-28 10:46:54 PM
They've said about 2m people at the parade.
 
2013-06-28 11:12:05 PM
WEAK.

-1 Subby
 
2013-06-28 11:20:28 PM

Tryfan: They've said about 2m people at the parade.


fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net
 
2013-06-28 11:40:05 PM

whistleridge: HaveBeerWillTravel: If any team is going to be obliterated from the Cup, the 1999 Dallas Stars would be my pick as well.

/Not bitter.

Yeah, why do I think this piece was written by a Sabres fan?


/because the login is about drinkin' beers.
 
2013-06-28 11:48:37 PM

HaveBeerWillTravel: If any team is going to be obliterated from the Cup, the 1999 Dallas Stars would be my pick as well.

/Not bitter.


To be fair though, it eventually gave us this gem

www.zoomph.com
 
2013-06-29 04:45:54 AM
 
2013-06-29 04:51:34 AM

Woolwine: HaveBeerWillTravel: If any team is going to be obliterated from the Cup, the 1999 Dallas Stars would be my pick as well.

/Not bitter.

To be fair though, it eventually gave us this gem


Jesus, that is one ugly sweater.
 
2013-06-29 08:19:58 AM
 
2013-06-29 08:55:43 AM

Cheesehead_Dave: Tryfan: They've said about 2m people at the parade.

[fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net image 720x405]


You have to account for the number of Wrigleyville douchebags who went out to buy their Hawks gear once the playoffs started so they could have the 'appropriate attire' for watching the game (aka drinking) at a bar.

"WOOOO GO HAWKS WOOOO F'N KANER WOOOO" - Someone who doesn't even know what Icing is

I really dislike some of the 'fans' in this city.
 
2013-06-29 09:27:49 AM

abhorrent1: Macy's Fail


[sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net image 800x600]

http://www1.macys.com/shop/product/reebok-shirt-nhl-chicago-blackhaw ks -stanley-cup-t-shirt?ID=962973&CategoryID=48050#fn=sp%3D1%26spc%3D2%26 kws%3Dblackhawks%26slotId%3D1


XP, firefox and a 4:3 ratio? what is this, 2003?

also subby Chicago won the stanley cup, not vancouver
 
2013-06-29 09:56:30 AM
Chicago is #41!!!!

In murders.
 
2013-06-29 10:14:54 AM

AdamK: XP, firefox and a 4:3 ratio? what is this, 2003?

also subby Chicago won the stanley cup, not vancouver


Not subby.
And I have no idea what you're talking about. So here's a line. _____________________________________
 
2013-06-29 11:50:02 AM
oi40.tinypic.com
 
2013-06-29 12:07:55 PM

lifeboat: [oi40.tinypic.com image 576x324]


Oh you.
Everyone knows the wings are the real champions. Everyone else just got lucky with deflections and stuff Detroit never relies on to win games.
 
2013-06-29 12:15:57 PM

abhorrent1: lifeboat: [oi40.tinypic.com image 576x324]

Oh you.
Everyone knows the wings are the real champions. Everyone else just got lucky with deflections and stuff Detroit never relies on to win games.


Just my way of saying thanks.
 
2013-06-29 12:54:05 PM
i53.tinypic.com
 
2013-06-29 01:00:07 PM

lifeboat: [oi40.tinypic.com image 576x324]


stream1.gifsoup.com
 
2013-06-29 03:21:36 PM
I see popcorn Johnny is still mad that he had to leave Chicago because of his restraining order.

I feel sorry for the KC residents that have to put up with his bullshiat now :(. It's only a matter of time that he hates their city too because some chick from there wouldn't bang him.
 
2013-06-29 06:16:52 PM
Oh yes, Chicago is a horrid place, it's violent, it's hateful it's....
www.poynter.org
Wait, what?

\Bruins fan
\\how Rocky is related to Dollar Bill is beyond me
 
2013-06-29 09:10:51 PM
FriarReb98:
\\how Rocky is related to Dollar Bill is beyond me

Rocky turned that ship around completely, and he did so practically overnight.  The transition from Dollar Bill to Rocky was one of the most interesting stories in Chicago sports history.

/ Hawks fan
// Hope to see Boston again next year
 
2013-06-29 09:58:20 PM

lifeboat: Hope to see Boston again next year


LOL the Hawks aren't making the Finals next year. Not sure who Detroit will be playing, but we know it won't be Chicago.
 
2013-06-29 10:32:27 PM

Popcorn Johnny: lifeboat: Hope to see Boston again next year

LOL the Hawks aren't making the Finals next year. Not sure who Detroit will be playing, but we know it won't be Chicago.


On behalf of Hawks fans everywhere, a very sincere thank you for that prediction.  You wizard, you.
 
2013-06-30 12:09:26 AM
Jesus Christ. Do people not see the <satire> tag anymore?

Riotboy: WEAK.

-1 Subby


Whenever I submit articles from The Onion, I don't change their headlines since it would be like chiseling the dick off of the David. Plus there wasn't a parade thread greenlit, so I put this bait out there for PJ and he, of course, obliged.

/submitter
//to paraphrase Corey Crawford: fark yeah farking woo we're the farking best
 
2013-06-30 02:31:30 AM

El Brujo: Woolwine: HaveBeerWillTravel: If any team is going to be obliterated from the Cup, the 1999 Dallas Stars would be my pick as well.

/Not bitter.

To be fair though, it eventually gave us this gem

Jesus, that is one ugly sweater.


That's actually one of the better ones IMO. There have been worse, such as the Mooterus and the boring all black basketball-like sweaters they had. thank god they're going with new ones next year
 
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