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(National Review)   Almost there: nationalizing gay marriage. Then, the next step will be churches have to perform homosexual marriage or they will lose their tax-exempt status   (nationalreview.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, Justice Kennedy, Charles Krauthammer, abortion law, supreme court ruling, same-sex marriages, majority opinion, DOMA, special reports  
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1916 clicks; posted to Politics » on 27 Jun 2013 at 11:43 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-06-27 10:00:07 AM  
10 votes:
"So where do you want to have our wedding, honey?"
"Well, we could do it at the church that we actually attend, with our minister whom we've known for years..."
"Or?"
"Let's do it at a place we've never been to, that openly despises us, conducted by a guy who is going to be scowling and pissed off during the entire ceremony!"
"It will be such a magical day!"
2013-06-27 12:11:40 PM  
7 votes:
Missing from the discussion of same-sex marriage is an explanation of the real consequences that result from it.

Some advocates of gay marriage claim that no harm is caused by it. They are correct, but what they do not tell you is that the lack of harm is the real danger of legalizing it. Gay marriage is opposed because the Bible warns against homosexuality, meaning that opposing it is an attempt to maintain God's law. But did you know that God's law, the Bible, also bans many other things, like murder, theft, boiling a goat in its mother's milk and adultery? It's true.

So when we legalize sodomy and gay marriage, and nothing bad happens, people will look at the result -- or the lack of result -- and say "Hey, disobeying God's law hasn't caused any problem yet, let's disobey more of it!". And then they will start legalizing other things that the Bible forbids, things that do cause harm when studied in the long-term, and the next thing that you know all kinds of anti-Biblical actions are legal, like murder, and rape, and genocide, and slavery.

That is what gay marriage will lead to. And the fact that gay marriage is not itself harmful makes it all the more dangerous. At least if we legalized murder, some people who used to support it might realize "Hey, my brother was murdered." or "Gee, I wish my father hadn't been murdered" and reconsider their position, and the path to an unBiblical society could be reversed early while the doorknob to the closet has been turned but the door hasn't been quite pulled open yet, but with gay marriage they will think "Hey, my sister married another woman and nothing bad happened", and then when murder and fabric mixing are made legal it will be too late because gay marriage was the turning of the doorknob and the other things were the opening of the closet, and you didn't realise that the closet was filled with potatoes, and now they are spilling out like an avalanche.
2013-06-27 09:36:54 AM  
7 votes:
WHEN OOG TAKE STEP EAST OOG END UP IN CHINA
OOG LESSON:  NO TAKE STEP EAST
2013-06-27 11:58:14 AM  
5 votes:
Yesterday was my second anniversary, but because of this decision, our traditional marriage was destroyed. We were forcibly auto-divorced and now I'm living in sin with a donkey. Thanks a lot SCOTUS.
2013-06-27 09:31:58 AM  
5 votes:
And turtle-f*cking! Don't forget the turtle-f*cking!
2013-06-27 11:49:36 AM  
3 votes:

BunkoSquad: This thread should be conducted in caveman-speak


COK RAW SPUNK POOT ALL NITE, NEED MARRIAGE. JIZZ WINDOW GROK AFTER NUPTIAL, LIMO NEED SQUEEGIE, RIBBONS OF SHAME.  AND SPOOGE.
2013-06-27 11:47:10 AM  
3 votes:

BunkoSquad: This thread should be conducted in caveman-speak


i161.photobucket.com
2013-06-27 10:13:37 AM  
3 votes:

Sgt Otter: "So where do you want to have our wedding, honey?"
"Well, we could do it at the church that we actually attend, with our minister whom we've known for years..."
"Or?"
"Let's do it at a place we've never been to, that openly despises us, conducted by a guy who is going to be scowling and pissed off during the entire ceremony!"
"It will be such a magical day!"


There was a great story a while back about a couple who got married overseas in...Mauritius? Madagascar?  And the local minister hated tourist weddings, and just smiled while swearing at them the whole time in his native tongue, calling the bride a whore, etc.
2013-06-27 12:53:09 PM  
2 votes:

clambam: Some years ago I was best man at a Catholic wedding. We were running through the rehearsal and the priest said "And at this point the best man and the maid of honor kneel." I said "Excuse me father but I'm Jewish. I will be happy to lower my head to show respect but I can't kneel in a Catholic church." He said "Either you kneel or the wedding's off. Find another best man if you want but I won't perform the service if you don't kneel." When we got to that part of the service I hovered with my knees above the stairs, gritting my teeth and seething with anger. After the ceremony I went off to find the priest and punch him in the nose, but he had collected his check and left.


"Next up, a bizarre and terrifying story about an angry Jew who assaulted an innocent Catholic priest... at his friend's wedding!  Governor Palin and Senator Santorum will join our panel to discuss modern day blood libel after this commercial break, here on Fox News Sunday.  Be right back."  *winks, uncrosses and recrosses legs, adjusts miniskirt*
2013-06-27 11:59:57 AM  
2 votes:

CPennypacker: Yesterday was my second anniversary, but because of this decision, our traditional marriage was destroyed. We were forcibly auto-divorced and now I'm living in sin with a donkey. Thanks a lot SCOTUS.


Same thing happened to me but our 17th anniversary was coming up.  Well the same except the donkey was taken and now I am alone, thanks CPennypacker.
2013-06-27 11:55:10 AM  
2 votes:
Reading NRO is like reading the old Jeanne Dixon predictions in Star Magazine.

"Larry Hagman and Joan Collins will wed in real life and the ceremony will be filmed for a combined episode of Dallas and Dynasty to be aired on all THREE networks."
"Soviet Premier Andropov will reveal he's obsessed with the music of KC and the Sunshine Band, inviting them for a concert in Red Square"'
2013-06-27 09:30:03 AM  
2 votes:
Are Christian churches currently required to perform Jewish weddings?  No? Then shut your farking face.
2013-06-28 09:11:21 AM  
1 vote:

Greystoke: Eventually, everyone will be married to everyone else. Then we'll all get divorced. Just think of the chaos when everyone is everyone else's bitter ex.


You know how I know you don't know a lot of lesbians...
2013-06-27 09:40:13 PM  
1 vote:

Marshal805: Like they did with interracial marriages right?

/Frigging Morans.
//Apologies if someone already pointed this out.
///Three for good luck.


Don't you get it, man?  This was the next stumble down the slippery slope after interracial marriages!  Clearly, this is snowballing out of control, and the only way to solve the problem is to go back in time and ensure that marriage is never invented at all!

Thanks, Obama!
2013-06-27 02:01:30 PM  
1 vote:

rufus-t-firefly: Dimensio: Missing from the discussion of same-sex marriage is an explanation of the real consequences that result from it.

Some advocates of gay marriage claim that no harm is caused by it. They are correct, but what they do not tell you is that the lack of harm is the real danger of legalizing it. Gay marriage is opposed because the Bible warns against homosexuality, meaning that opposing it is an attempt to maintain God's law. But did you know that God's law, the Bible, also bans many other things, like murder, theft, boiling a goat in its mother's milk and adultery? It's true.

So when we legalize sodomy and gay marriage, and nothing bad happens, people will look at the result -- or the lack of result -- and say "Hey, disobeying God's law hasn't caused any problem yet, let's disobey more of it!". And then they will start legalizing other things that the Bible forbids, things that do cause harm when studied in the long-term, and the next thing that you know all kinds of anti-Biblical actions are legal, like murder, and rape, and genocide, and slavery.

That is what gay marriage will lead to. And the fact that gay marriage is not itself harmful makes it all the more dangerous. At least if we legalized murder, some people who used to support it might realize "Hey, my brother was murdered." or "Gee, I wish my father hadn't been murdered" and reconsider their position, and the path to an unBiblical society could be reversed early while the doorknob to the closet has been turned but the door hasn't been quite pulled open yet, but with gay marriage they will think "Hey, my sister married another woman and nothing bad happened", and then when murder and fabric mixing are made legal it will be too late because gay marriage was the turning of the doorknob and the other things were the opening of the closet, and you didn't realise that the closet was filled with potatoes, and now they are spilling out like an avalanche.

So we should stick to the Biblical definition of mar ...


Geez, you just keep getting bites man, even after it's been explained. 15/10 and a gold star. The potato avalance was a nice way to tie it all together.
2013-06-27 01:19:36 PM  
1 vote:

Dimensio: Missing from the discussion of same-sex marriage is an explanation of the real consequences that result from it.

Some advocates of gay marriage claim that no harm is caused by it. They are correct, but what they do not tell you is that the lack of harm is the real danger of legalizing it. Gay marriage is opposed because the Bible warns against homosexuality, meaning that opposing it is an attempt to maintain God's law. But did you know that God's law, the Bible, also bans many other things, like murder, theft, boiling a goat in its mother's milk and adultery? It's true.

So when we legalize sodomy and gay marriage, and nothing bad happens, people will look at the result -- or the lack of result -- and say "Hey, disobeying God's law hasn't caused any problem yet, let's disobey more of it!". And then they will start legalizing other things that the Bible forbids, things that do cause harm when studied in the long-term, and the next thing that you know all kinds of anti-Biblical actions are legal, like murder, and rape, and genocide, and slavery.

That is what gay marriage will lead to. And the fact that gay marriage is not itself harmful makes it all the more dangerous. At least if we legalized murder, some people who used to support it might realize "Hey, my brother was murdered." or "Gee, I wish my father hadn't been murdered" and reconsider their position, and the path to an unBiblical society could be reversed early while the doorknob to the closet has been turned but the door hasn't been quite pulled open yet, but with gay marriage they will think "Hey, my sister married another woman and nothing bad happened", and then when murder and fabric mixing are made legal it will be too late because gay marriage was the turning of the doorknob and the other things were the opening of the closet, and you didn't realise that the closet was filled with potatoes, and now they are spilling out like an avalanche.


Potatoes that were pouring like an avalanche, coming down the mountain?
2013-06-27 12:41:50 PM  
1 vote:

Pincy: A Dark Evil Omen: lockers: A Dark Evil Omen: lockers: A Dark Evil Omen: lockers: GhostFish: Okay, I'll admit it.

Breeders might not be able to make any church perform their marriages, but we gays can.

You are the worst sort of person. Leave it to the fringe to make people feel justified in their bigotry.

[i.imgur.com image 264x373]

So you support using pejoratives against people who aren't like you? Good to know.

I support making fun of people who would seriously state, "Whaa! You were slightly mean to me! That totally justifies decades of institutionalized oppression!"

Put down the vodka, buddy. I never said that people ARE justified, I said they feel justified. It is exactly the divisive language that GhostFish used that muddies this debate. It is clear cut that sexual orientation is not something we should discriminate against, and you condone him using a pejorative against sexual orientation. It is comic in it's stupidity.

Yeah, I know, "breeders" hurts, it takes me back to centuries of being given preferential societal status and how even today my relationship is seen as morally and legally superior to other peoples' in huge parts of the world because of the parts my wife happens to have. When will the not-oppression end?

I'm pretty sure gay people can be breeders as well.  Lesbians can do artificial insemination.  And I know a woman who is currently pregnant as a surrogate for two gay guys and the sperm that fertilized the donor egg inside of her came from one of the guys.


Sure. There's tons of ridiculousness with this pearl-clutching. And I get that at the core of lockers's whining, there is a kernel of validity to not using discriminatory language like that; I certainly wouldn't. I just feel the need to needle a straight guy acting so injured by the term "breeders" in a thread about how there's still a massive political machine against equal rights.
2013-06-27 12:39:09 PM  
1 vote:

A Dark Evil Omen: lockers: A Dark Evil Omen: lockers: A Dark Evil Omen: lockers: GhostFish: Okay, I'll admit it.

Breeders might not be able to make any church perform their marriages, but we gays can.

You are the worst sort of person. Leave it to the fringe to make people feel justified in their bigotry.

[i.imgur.com image 264x373]

So you support using pejoratives against people who aren't like you? Good to know.

I support making fun of people who would seriously state, "Whaa! You were slightly mean to me! That totally justifies decades of institutionalized oppression!"

Put down the vodka, buddy. I never said that people ARE justified, I said they feel justified. It is exactly the divisive language that GhostFish used that muddies this debate. It is clear cut that sexual orientation is not something we should discriminate against, and you condone him using a pejorative against sexual orientation. It is comic in it's stupidity.

Yeah, I know, "breeders" hurts, it takes me back to centuries of being given preferential societal status and how even today my relationship is seen as morally and legally superior to other peoples' in huge parts of the world because of the parts my wife happens to have. When will the not-oppression end?


Well, I can put you in touch with a few dominatrix's who will handle that for you if you'd like
2013-06-27 12:36:24 PM  
1 vote:

lockers: A Dark Evil Omen: lockers: A Dark Evil Omen: lockers: GhostFish: Okay, I'll admit it.

Breeders might not be able to make any church perform their marriages, but we gays can.

You are the worst sort of person. Leave it to the fringe to make people feel justified in their bigotry.

[i.imgur.com image 264x373]

So you support using pejoratives against people who aren't like you? Good to know.

I support making fun of people who would seriously state, "Whaa! You were slightly mean to me! That totally justifies decades of institutionalized oppression!"

Put down the vodka, buddy. I never said that people ARE justified, I said they feel justified. It is exactly the divisive language that GhostFish used that muddies this debate. It is clear cut that sexual orientation is not something we should discriminate against, and you condone him using a pejorative against sexual orientation. It is comic in it's stupidity.


Yeah, I know, "breeders" hurts, it takes me back to centuries of being given preferential societal status and how even today my relationship is seen as morally and legally superior to other peoples' in huge parts of the world because of the parts my wife happens to have. When will the not-oppression end?
2013-06-27 12:32:59 PM  
1 vote:
kvetchmom.files.wordpress.com
2013-06-27 12:30:16 PM  
1 vote:

bmongar: CPennypacker: Yesterday was my second anniversary, but because of this decision, our traditional marriage was destroyed. We were forcibly auto-divorced and now I'm living in sin with a donkey. Thanks a lot SCOTUS.

Same thing happened to me but our 17th anniversary was coming up.  Well the same except the donkey was taken and now I am alone, thanks CPennypacker.


You guys have it easy!

Not only was my marriage torn assunder, but then I was forced to gay marry into a donkey's turtle harem. Tonight is my night
2013-06-27 12:21:44 PM  
1 vote:

lockers: A Dark Evil Omen: lockers: GhostFish: Okay, I'll admit it.

Breeders might not be able to make any church perform their marriages, but we gays can.

You are the worst sort of person. Leave it to the fringe to make people feel justified in their bigotry.

[i.imgur.com image 264x373]

So you support using pejoratives against people who aren't like you? Good to know.


I support making fun of people who would seriously state, "Whaa! You were slightly mean to me! That totally justifies decades of institutionalized oppression!"
2013-06-27 12:00:31 PM  
1 vote:

coeyagi: BunkoSquad: This thread should be conducted in caveman-speak

COK RAW SPUNK POOT ALL NITE, NEED MARRIAGE. JIZZ WINDOW GROK AFTER NUPTIAL, LIMO NEED SQUEEGIE, RIBBONS OF SHAME.  AND SPOOGE.


Go on......
2013-06-27 11:59:38 AM  
1 vote:

CPennypacker: Yesterday was my second anniversary, but because of this decision, our traditional marriage was destroyed. We were forcibly auto-divorced and now I'm living in sin with a donkey. Thanks a lot SCOTUS.


I can't decide who has it worse, you or the donkey?
2013-06-27 11:56:16 AM  
1 vote:
If the local Baptist Church won't perform a Black Mass so I can gay-marry a dolphin, I'm calling the TSA!!
2013-06-27 11:47:48 AM  
1 vote:

max_pooper: When did the Catholic church lose its tax exempt status for refusing to marry divorced people?

Oh, they haven't? You mean the mouth breathers arguments against marriage equality are all bullshait? I am shocked.


To be fair, Krauthammer  breaths through a tube, not his mouth.
2013-06-27 11:45:49 AM  
1 vote:
When did the Catholic church lose its tax exempt status for refusing to marry divorced people?

Oh, they haven't? You mean the mouth breathers arguments against marriage equality are all bullshait? I am shocked.
2013-06-27 09:41:40 AM  
1 vote:

James!: Are Christian churches currently required to perform Jewish weddings?  No? Then shut your farking face.


Not only that, but imagine what it's like for the handful of bigoted churches that won't perform mixed-race weddings these days?  Sure, they still exist and the Evil Gub'mint doesn't harass them... but their congregations are all 90+ and their few indoctrinated children, so they're slowly dying anyway.  Give it a few decades and see how many hold out.  Meanwhile, you may not get the one you wanted, but you should be able to find one... if you live in the right state.

My prediction is that the 12 states where it's legal will begin to see a resurgence, a real economic recovery as all the excess talent and experience in the homosexual population slowly relocates to them.
2013-06-27 09:35:30 AM  
1 vote:
This thread should be conducted in caveman-speak
2013-06-27 09:24:10 AM  
1 vote:
All movement from status quo goes straight down a slippery slope to a pool filled with the stone knives of political strawment.

/Not even Yoo would defend how I just tortured those words
 
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