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(Jalopnik)   The Smart Fortwo kind of sucks. It's tiny, it's got no power, its gas mileage isn't as good as you would expect, and its automated manual transmission is terrible. But you know what it's really bad at? Off-roading   (jalopnik.com) divider line 63
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4815 clicks; posted to Geek » on 25 Jun 2013 at 6:09 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-25 05:20:36 PM  
OK, that's funny.
 
2013-06-25 05:21:22 PM  
Sooo, just submit a headline with actual quote from article.....ooookay then.
 
2013-06-25 06:16:32 PM  
Slamming those wheels into curbs seems like a great way to ruin your miniature tires and rims.
 
2013-06-25 06:18:04 PM  
Can I get that in a 6-pack? those are adorable.
 
2013-06-25 06:21:48 PM  
Cute. Not the car, but the quote.

Reminds me of a guy that was laughing about the fuel burn in an F/A-18:

"Yeah, it kind of is a mishmash plane, not great at any one thing, except it does burn fuel faster than just about anything else."
 
2013-06-25 06:22:59 PM  

Need a Dispenser Here: Slamming those wheels into curbs seems like a great way to ruin your miniature tires and rims.


It 3D prints new ones while you're off shopping.
/Why you need to go shopping if that were possible I don't know
 
2013-06-25 06:24:01 PM  
From the looks of the commercial...are those things rear wheel drive?

Neighbor has one.  I was waiting for him to have issues once we got our first 10-14 inch snowfall, but that thing plowed through it just as surefooted as my POS front-wheel drive Accord.
 
2013-06-25 06:27:20 PM  
I've ridden in one and it feels like you shouldn't be on the road with normal vehicles.
 
2013-06-25 06:27:51 PM  
Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.
 
2013-06-25 06:29:05 PM  
The Smart Fortwo kind of sucks. It's tiny, it's got no power, its gas mileage isn't as good as you would expect, and its automated manual transmission is terrible. But you know what it's really bad at? Off-roading

/what? if it's good enough for plagarmitter it's good enough for me!
 
2013-06-25 06:30:22 PM  

Skyd1v: From the looks of the commercial...are those things rear wheel drive?

Neighbor has one.  I was waiting for him to have issues once we got our first 10-14 inch snowfall, but that thing plowed through it just as surefooted as my POS front-wheel drive Accord.


Maybe he was smart enough to get snows or chains?
 
2013-06-25 06:31:23 PM  

Skyd1v: From the looks of the commercial...are those things rear wheel drive?

Neighbor has one.  I was waiting for him to have issues once we got our first 10-14 inch snowfall, but that thing plowed through it just as surefooted as my POS front-wheel drive Accord.


The motor's in the back as well.
 
2013-06-25 06:34:27 PM  
Can I have a pair in 13 1/2 medium width?
 
2013-06-25 06:35:58 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: Skyd1v: From the looks of the commercial...are those things rear wheel drive?

Neighbor has one.  I was waiting for him to have issues once we got our first 10-14 inch snowfall, but that thing plowed through it just as surefooted as my POS front-wheel drive Accord.

The motor's in the back as well.


And if you stick a penny into the rear bumper, it does wheelies.

/So would stick a giant fake penny on there if I had one
 
2013-06-25 06:36:21 PM  
The trick is to save your blue shell right up until the parking space duel.
 
2013-06-25 06:42:30 PM  
Where do you put the key in to wind it up?
 
2013-06-25 06:52:18 PM  
Here's my problem with these cars- the industry knows what we want. Sure, we want something that's good for the environment and the wallet, but we don't want to look like space dorks at the same time. They could have given us similar specs in something small and sporty looking like the Miata but instead they gave us something that makes a Pacer look cool by comparison. Is this a case of self sabotage on the part of the automotive industry? 'Hey we gave you low emission, safe cars but no one wanted to buy them. It's not our fault'. Is it possible to make the Prius any more ugly? The Smart car looks like they built the body around my Lazy Boy. I'm all for saving the planet but do I really have to look like an extra from Logan's Run?
 
2013-06-25 06:58:24 PM  
Apparently the stunt people in that commercial do not know how to parallel park.
 
2013-06-25 07:08:40 PM  
It's a golfcart. What did you expect, a real car?
 
2013-06-25 07:13:35 PM  

Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.


I have never before or since felt such a strong desire to own a cheap, small car.

/Is this thorough enough for you, Mr. Needham?
 
2013-06-25 07:14:18 PM  
I can't help but see these little coffee cans with wheels and think to myself, "Anyone stupid enough to PAY for one of those deserves whatever it is they get."
 
2013-06-25 07:17:13 PM  

HMS_Blinkin: Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.

I have never before or since felt such a strong desire to own a cheap, small car.

/Is this thorough enough for you, Mr. Needham?


Incidentally a Ford Fiesta has just as good if not not better gas mileage than the Smart.

/Why in the world you would buy one of those given the other choices is beyond me. Maybe in Europe where parking is a contact sport but I just don't get them here.
 
2013-06-25 07:20:17 PM  

Lunchlady: HMS_Blinkin: Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.

I have never before or since felt such a strong desire to own a cheap, small car.

/Is this thorough enough for you, Mr. Needham?

Incidentally a Ford Fiesta has just as good if not not better gas mileage than the Smart.

/Why in the world you would buy one of those given the other choices is beyond me. Maybe in Europe where parking is a contact sport but I just don't get them here.


Usually better. I average about 36.5-37 in mine with the exception of a couple of months in summer where my a/c is going full blast every second I'm in the car.

Also, for less than $20,000 I got boatload of gadgets. I'm a total gadget geek when it comes to cars.
 
2013-06-25 07:28:15 PM  

Hiro Nakamura: Lunchlady: HMS_Blinkin: Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.

I have never before or since felt such a strong desire to own a cheap, small car.

/Is this thorough enough for you, Mr. Needham?

Incidentally a Ford Fiesta has just as good if not not better gas mileage than the Smart.

/Why in the world you would buy one of those given the other choices is beyond me. Maybe in Europe where parking is a contact sport but I just don't get them here.

Usually better. I average about 36.5-37 in mine with the exception of a couple of months in summer where my a/c is going full blast every second I'm in the car.

Also, for less than $20,000 I got boatload of gadgets. I'm a total gadget geek when it comes to cars.


You must do a lot of highway driving. My manual gets about 33-34 here in LA through the entire year.
 
2013-06-25 07:29:36 PM  

Hiro Nakamura: Lunchlady: HMS_Blinkin: Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.

I have never before or since felt such a strong desire to own a cheap, small car.

/Is this thorough enough for you, Mr. Needham?

Incidentally a Ford Fiesta has just as good if not not better gas mileage than the Smart.

/Why in the world you would buy one of those given the other choices is beyond me. Maybe in Europe where parking is a contact sport but I just don't get them here.

Usually better. I average about 36.5-37 in mine with the exception of a couple of months in summer where my a/c is going full blast every second I'm in the car.

Also, for less than $20,000 I got boatload of gadgets. I'm a total gadget geek when it comes to cars.


You have a smart or fiesta? My smart averages 42mpg.
 
2013-06-25 07:38:14 PM  

Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.


I have never seen that until you mentioned it.

10/10 would watch again.
 
2013-06-25 07:42:49 PM  
Still better than the G-Wiz and the Mulsanne.

/of course, that's like saying having a cold is better than having cancer or plague
 
2013-06-25 07:46:05 PM  

DoomPaul: Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.

I have never seen that until you mentioned it.

10/10 would watch again.


A non-porn bookmark, in this thread?
 
2013-06-25 07:49:07 PM  

Lunchlady: HMS_Blinkin: Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.

I have never before or since felt such a strong desire to own a cheap, small car.

/Is this thorough enough for you, Mr. Needham?

Incidentally a Ford Fiesta has just as good if not not better gas mileage than the Smart.

/Why in the world you would buy one of those given the other choices is beyond me. Maybe in Europe where parking is a contact sport but I just don't get them here.


You have clearly never had to battle for parking in Boston or New York.
 
2013-06-25 07:51:37 PM  
I can go off-roading AND get into some really small city parking spaces in my Wrangler.

And they probably cost as much as this ridiculous car.
 
2013-06-25 07:52:08 PM  

Close2TheEdge: Lunchlady: HMS_Blinkin: Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.

I have never before or since felt such a strong desire to own a cheap, small car.

/Is this thorough enough for you, Mr. Needham?

Incidentally a Ford Fiesta has just as good if not not better gas mileage than the Smart.

/Why in the world you would buy one of those given the other choices is beyond me. Maybe in Europe where parking is a contact sport but I just don't get them here.

You have clearly never had to battle for parking in Boston or New York.


Well having grown up about 30 miles north of Boston, yes I have. But considering people who have cars sometimes leave the city I don't see why if you only had one car you'd make it a Smart.
 
2013-06-25 08:01:06 PM  

ReverendLoki: Quantum Apostrophe: Skyd1v: From the looks of the commercial...are those things rear wheel drive?

Neighbor has one.  I was waiting for him to have issues once we got our first 10-14 inch snowfall, but that thing plowed through it just as surefooted as my POS front-wheel drive Accord.

The motor's in the back as well.

And if you stick a penny into the rear bumper, it does wheelies.

/So would stick a giant fake penny on there if I had one


i1023.photobucket.com
 
2013-06-25 08:03:07 PM  
Representative of the unwashed masses: The Smart Fortwo kind of sucks. It's tiny, it's got no power, its gas mileage isn't as good as you would expect, and its automated manual transmission is terrible. But you know what it's really bad at? Off-roading

/what? if it's good enough for plagarmitter it's good enough for me!


img.gawkerassets.com

Dicknose is not amused and frowns upon your shenanigans plagarmitter
 
2013-06-25 08:03:32 PM  

inglixthemad: Cute. Not the car, but the quote.

Reminds me of a guy that was laughing about the fuel burn in an F/A-18:

"Yeah, it kind of is a mishmash plane, not great at any one thing, except it does burn fuel faster than just about anything else."


Except the electronics.
 
2013-06-25 08:05:28 PM  
Every time I see a Smart, I point and laugh. That stupid little tin can can't be much safer than being on a motorcycle in a crash, minus the possibility of road rash, and the gas mileage sucks for what you have to give up to get it. Sure, you can fit into small parking spaces, but if the entire rest of your driving experience sucks, what's the point? It IS possible to make cars that are both fun to drive and fairly practical.

I laugh at Priuses too, because I get 80 MPG and I'm having way more fun.
 
2013-06-25 08:07:13 PM  

Lunchlady: HMS_Blinkin: Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.

I have never before or since felt such a strong desire to own a cheap, small car.

/Is this thorough enough for you, Mr. Needham?

Incidentally a Ford Fiesta has just as good if not not better gas mileage than the Smart.

/Why in the world you would buy one of those given the other choices is beyond me. Maybe in Europe where parking is a contact sport but I just don't get them here.


Fiesta looks slick, too:

www.ford.com
 
2013-06-25 08:10:48 PM  

Alexei Novikov: That stupid little tin can can't be much safer than being on a motorcycle in a crash


They actually have four and five star crash ratings.  The car is built around a safety cell.
 
2013-06-25 08:11:00 PM  

Lando Lincoln: I can go off-roading AND get into some really small city parking spaces in my Wrangler.

And they probably cost as much as this ridiculous car.


This. Got my base Wrangler on a great dealer sale. Best car buy ever. Mileage sucks pretty hardcore I guess but I don't have a big work commute anyway.
 
2013-06-25 08:11:06 PM  

Alexei Novikov: Every time I see a Smart, I point and laugh. That stupid little tin can can't be much safer than being on a motorcycle in a crash, minus the possibility of road rash, and the gas mileage sucks for what you have to give up to get it. Sure, you can fit into small parking spaces, but if the entire rest of your driving experience sucks, what's the point? It IS possible to make cars that are both fun to drive and fairly practical.

I laugh at Priuses too, because I get 80 MPG and I'm having way more fun.


aww 80 MPG how cute

cloudfront.mediamatters.org
 
2013-06-25 08:33:20 PM  
I had a Smart for two Diesel that I bought in 2006.  The car was funky, had a really goofy rubber band type of transmission and timing.  But you know what?  I loved it.  4.2L/100KM (56mpg us) (67mpg imp).  I drove it for my 130km round trip commute and for my little bit of work driving.  I would take it to Costco and fill up the small back with a cart full o crap.  Sometimes I had to put it in the passenger seat.  I work in IT so I've had the back filled up with a couple of servers and some lcd monitors (doing it with the old CRT's sucked!)  Sure you could get certain features for less, and yeah the diesel was a craptonne better than the Gas version that North America has, but so what?

<haters_gonna_hate.jpg> <stop_liking_what_I_dont_like.jpg>

That commercial made me smile.  And yeah, I loved parking in the City with it.

/Right now they have a $99/mo lease going on in Toronto.
//Probably sucky km allowance tho.
///Mirvish Theatre charges $5 for smart car parking in down town TO.  That's a hella good deal.
 
2013-06-25 08:34:36 PM  

meanmutton: Lunchlady: HMS_Blinkin: Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.

I have never before or since felt such a strong desire to own a cheap, small car.

/Is this thorough enough for you, Mr. Needham?

Incidentally a Ford Fiesta has just as good if not not better gas mileage than the Smart.

/Why in the world you would buy one of those given the other choices is beyond me. Maybe in Europe where parking is a contact sport but I just don't get them here.

Fiesta looks slick, too:

[www.ford.com image 657x424]


I have one, it's fantastic. Inexpensive but doesn't feel cheap, good mileage, and I've had it for 2 1/2 years with no problems.
 
2013-06-25 09:10:08 PM  
A relative has an apartment in midtown Manhattan. There's an odd piece of curb across the street from her apartment that has about 70 inches of space between a driveway and the corner. Someone who owns one of the smart cars figured out that it's pretty much a perfect fit, with a couple inches to spare. Cracks me up every time I see it, and I'm sure sooner or later the city will take away that little accidental bit of free parking, but it sure is funny.
 
2013-06-25 09:23:16 PM  

redsquid: Here's my problem with these cars- the industry knows what we want. Sure, we want something that's good for the environment and the wallet, but we don't want to look like space dorks at the same time. They could have given us similar specs in something small and sporty looking like the Miata but instead they gave us something that makes a Pacer look cool by comparison. Is this a case of self sabotage on the part of the automotive industry? 'Hey we gave you low emission, safe cars but no one wanted to buy them. It's not our fault'. Is it possible to make the Prius any more ugly? The Smart car looks like they built the body around my Lazy Boy. I'm all for saving the planet but do I really have to look like an extra from Logan's Run?


All the above.
 
2013-06-25 09:41:04 PM  

Carth: Alexei Novikov: Every time I see a Smart, I point and laugh. That stupid little tin can can't be much safer than being on a motorcycle in a crash, minus the possibility of road rash, and the gas mileage sucks for what you have to give up to get it. Sure, you can fit into small parking spaces, but if the entire rest of your driving experience sucks, what's the point? It IS possible to make cars that are both fun to drive and fairly practical.

I laugh at Priuses too, because I get 80 MPG and I'm having way more fun.

aww 80 MPG how cute

[cloudfront.mediamatters.org image 850x564]


Tesla is an awesome company. But one of those would pay for 20 of my bikes, brand new. If electric motorcycles drop in price and get rid of their range issues, though, I'll be all over it. Dat torque...
 
2013-06-25 09:41:36 PM  
catholicdialogue.files.wordpress.com

Fourtwo, I'd rather have a two-four.
 
2013-06-25 09:49:40 PM  

Glitchwerks: Alexei Novikov: That stupid little tin can can't be much safer than being on a motorcycle in a crash

They actually have four and five star crash ratings.  The car is built around a safety cell.


Problem is that there's not enough "car" to absorb kinetic energy. There's a video out there, they demonstrate that at great speed your body will remain mostly un-mangled but the deceleration g-forces will likely kill you.

I once considered buying a Ford fiesta but I don't remember if they come with 6 speed transmissions. I'm dead set on that, manual preferably. My mind is on a Cruze eco.
 
2013-06-25 11:02:41 PM  
I'm a beefy 6'5". I tried to get in a smart and found my knee wedged between the door and the wheel. I asked how I operated the tilt steering wheel and got out immediately on the raised eyebrows.

They'd sell better if they weren't being sold at the high class Mercedes dealerships. Just steal the Apple Store wood and lights model and put the cars in the malls.
 
2013-06-25 11:07:54 PM  

Glitchwerks: Not quite as epic as Top Gear's test of the Ford Fiesta (which probably sold more Fiesta's than any Ford commercial ever could,) but funny nonetheless.


Before the kids, we wanted to buy one.  Seriously, I wouldn't doubt your theory.
 
2013-06-25 11:17:14 PM  
It is a shame too that the Smart convertible sportster did not do well enough or make it to the US.  That was a very funny looking car, but looked like it was just as fun to drive around in.
 
2013-06-25 11:39:06 PM  

bingethinker: Where do you put the key in to wind it up?


  www.blogcdn.com

Right like this. I cracked up the day I saw one of these going the other way with the key spinning around.
 
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