If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Business Insider)   Dear Loser, Thank you very little for your demo. It is currently on its way to the lower-intestine of the talent-acquisition process. Sincerely, Brutally Honest Job Rejections   (businessinsider.com) divider line 115
    More: Amusing, mergers  
•       •       •

19738 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jun 2013 at 1:56 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



115 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-06-25 07:16:22 PM
It looks like it says "Loner" to me.
 
2013-06-25 07:29:35 PM

RatMaster999: I wish I could send out notices like this...

I do the hiring triage for workstudy student applications.  I'll probably look over about 700 apps for 20-25 positions in the Fall.  Some of them need a good slap in the face to wake them up.  Txtspk, ALL CAPS, skipping questions, etc are not good ways to draw my attention to your application.


I applied for a workstudy job and it took them almost  a year to get back to me. Interviewed, it was love, but they said they couldn't hire me because I didn't have a year's worth of semesters left to go at their 2-year college. Hmm, gee. If they'd taken less than a year to see my application I would have had at least a year left to go. And that I was on a 4-year plan (transferring to a university) and would be a college student for at least two more years.

/To their credit, they did forward my info to a small VA office in another town and I've been working there happily since February.
 
2013-06-25 07:30:46 PM

Usurper4: CSB time!!!

I've done some freelance writing over my lifetime, and heard about a magazine called The Luddite (I think?), that was directed towards, obviously, luddites. As soon as I saw that, I remembered that there was a blurb about how the Mennonites in Phoenix were struggling with maintaining their non-modern existence in light of changing times, particularly with their children. So, I had the idea to pitch a story to The Luddite about this struggle.

I received a rejection letter about a month letter...handwritten...on 3-ring binder notebook paper...full of misspellings and grammar errors. The big thing I most remember is how offended the editor was and how insulting he was to me about the fact that I wrote my pitch...on a computer. All kinds of stuff about "You obviously have never read our magazine or even taken the time to look up what a luddite is". He took the time to point out a grammatical error in my proposal (which, according to me and Elements of Style it was not) and tried to point out that I needed an apostrophe in "its" when discussing the possessive form. It was that bad and awesome.

I'm pretty sure I still have that at home...I may need to frame it.


You should scan and post it.

I want to see. :)
 
2013-06-25 07:50:49 PM

WordyGrrl: RatMaster999: I wish I could send out notices like this...

I do the hiring triage for workstudy student applications.  I'll probably look over about 700 apps for 20-25 positions in the Fall.  Some of them need a good slap in the face to wake them up.  Txtspk, ALL CAPS, skipping questions, etc are not good ways to draw my attention to your application.

I applied for a workstudy job and it took them almost  a year to get back to me. Interviewed, it was love, but they said they couldn't hire me because I didn't have a year's worth of semesters left to go at their 2-year college. Hmm, gee. If they'd taken less than a year to see my application I would have had at least a year left to go. And that I was on a 4-year plan (transferring to a university) and would be a college student for at least two more years.

/To their credit, they did forward my info to a small VA office in another town and I've been working there happily since February.


Ouch, that sucks.  We hire at the beginning of every semester, so anyone that hasn't heard from us by the end of the second week of classes should generally assume they've been rejected.
 
2013-06-25 08:56:28 PM
Ack. Am currently looking and would be happy to at least get rejection letters, at that point you know that your résumé went somewhere.
Been on a few interviews, only one decent prospect.
The job that wanted to hire me was too dangerous, too demanding, and the pay was insulting... I turned it down. The next week after the offer I got a rejection letter. I LOL'd.
 
2013-06-25 10:03:40 PM
Creepiest job interview was when I was asked to come over after work, show my reel and chat with the creative director.  On such short notice I had to show my reel on a laptop as I had no time to burn a dvd.  After 10 minutes he asked, "so, you want to work for us?"  I answered that I would not quit a 4 year job commitment on the basis of a 10 minute interview without more specifics. I said let me think about it and I'll call you in the morning. They never returned my call.
 
2013-06-25 10:51:06 PM
Wow....

These people got answers from sending in their job application! Man, I sure wish that had happened to me when I was applying for jobs...
 
2013-06-26 12:06:23 AM

akya: Amidala:
I hate Git pharmacy. If you called around asking about the price of any item they sold, every store would give you a different price. I wish they would have a centralized system to store the prices so each store would not have their own prices.

you think Git is bad? Try SVN! i called a bunch of their stores looking for a prescription and each gave me a different version of the same story!

/And Don't get me started on VSS


Lord Dimwit:
Yeah, but HR policies are so mercurial, it's bazaar. I'd imagine the employees at some of the worst offenders are actively planning subversion. The employees already have very little, and bit by bit keepers like management take more and more of the pie.


I told them they must, perforce, provide a strong team foundation. They cleared my case and now I'm working at CVS.
 
2013-06-26 12:40:58 AM

smoky2010: Honestly HR people are the used car salesmen of the corporate world.. I have yet to meet one that was genuinely nice or competent.

/I'm not some new kid on the street either. I have had a continual employment since 1992, with the exception of 6 weeks when I was laid off this January


That's because their only purpose in the business world, it to screen people out, not to let them in.

I have hired dozens of people in my life, and have been rude to very few applicants.

About the only one I can really recall is having a person, I think it was male, walk in with it's own application form, prefilled out with something like writing on it. And as I was talking to this person, with the "F*CK THE POLICE" neck tattoo, facial piercings, ear lobe gauges, and nose pin, it asked what the chance of getting a call back would be.

I looked at it's resume, tossed it in the 86 file, and stated; "Not real good".

Almost felt bad, it could have been a OK sort, but seriously, the thought of having to look at that for several hours a day wasn't happening.
 
2013-06-26 12:53:44 AM

smoky2010: Lord Dimwit: Amidala: d23: poot_rootbeer: hstein3: These days, you're more likely to just get automated messages from the company's hiring website that you used to apply.

I remember back in the days when you used to get automated messages.

When looking for my current job I had an interview with a pharmaceutical chain that is identified by three letters (the same three letters that also represent the name of an open source versioning server).  I had to travel 60 minutes away for an interview that was for a job in the town in which I lived.  So I spent a good deal of money and time to interview for their job... but they couldn't even be bothered to send me a message when they rejected me.  I think it's rather rude to not send a polite rejection to anyone that interviews (that's a step back where the polite thing to do was to send a note to anyone that applied), but when I think someone has taken that time, spent money on gas to interview for a LOCAL job, etc., I think it's beyond the pale to not send a polite rejection.

Of course we're in the corporate era and corporatism is often the system of values these HR people live under, so you'll hear whines from them about how that is wasting the company's time.  I think it's a sign of someone you don't want to work for.

I hate Git pharmacy. If you called around asking about the price of any item they sold, every store would give you a different price. I wish they would have a centralized system to store the prices so each store would not have their own prices.

Yeah, but HR policies are so mercurial, it's bazaar. I'd imagine the employees at some of the worst offenders are actively planning subversion. The employees already have very little, and bit by bit keepers like management take more and more of the pie.

As a manager, we get screwed to. I work 60+ hours a week and have fought for people that worked for me (who made more than me) to get raises. Don't think that because we aren't the people in the ditches that we a ...


You Sir/Madam, may need to look at self-employment.

Find something that you can make money at, hire a few workers, and enjoy your 60 hour weeks. Hell, I'd work 80, but I'd have to fire someone, and I like my employees.
 
2013-06-26 01:02:11 AM

kim jong-un: Aar1012: Someday, I really just want to draft a fake resume and cover letter. Tailor it to their specifications minus one or two things and just note that I match their specifications except that one thing and mention how I Highly doubt someone is actually reading this letter because I'm automatically passed over. I'd finished up about judging a book by its cover

I once was turned down by an automated system for a position requiring experience with a particular bit of avionics.

I designed that radio 4 years earlier. My signature was on the drawings...


I was canned once, when I pointed out my new company's business model involved ripping off other's patents for tracking web traffic, including mine.

They were honestly shocked that I called it stealing.

/like they never even looked at the names on the patents.
 
2013-06-26 03:25:22 AM
Brutally honest rejection letters?  More like brutally asshole ego-tripping.
 
2013-06-26 10:31:47 AM

Hagbardr: pute kisses like a man: MythDragon: pute kisses like a man: Banned on the Run: (18) "He would argue with a signpost."

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 850x588]

One of the best moments.

That and that Goddamn dinosaur raptor model I emptied a magazine into because I thought it was about to attack me.

ha!  yeah, i remember the first time doing that mission.  you're giving a whole big spiel about, get in, be quiet, don't kill anyone... and the very first thing you see is this goddamn dinosaur!  I totally opened up on the dinosaur... despite thinking... dinosaurs? wtf?

would have completely failed the necessity for stealth if that game was more cruel hearted.

fortunately, they knew it would scare the shiat out of people and kept it out of earshot from the night watchmen.  seriously, best written game ever.

Too bad it was painfully buggy. I couldn't run it on my modern machine because 4 gb of ram made it shiat its pants. I had to use my P4 instead and it loved to stutter.


i had some nostalgia and ran the game again recently on a windows 7 computer.  first off, you need to download the official patch, and then download the most recent fan based unofficial patch.  the unofficial patches are like miracles.

here's a link to the steam forum that links to the different patchs, and provides other information on getting it to run on a newer computer

http://forums.steampowered.com/forums/sh owthread.php?s=cf9cc56e3e393db 460eb6144a3f9b589&t=2025035

i played through it recently and didn't have any problems... well, almost no problems.. for some reason, doors opened really slowly.  but, that was completely tolerable in the face of the awesomeness of blood boiling people and delving into madness, talking to stop signs and tvs.
 
2013-06-26 10:58:16 AM

pute kisses like a man: Hagbardr: pute kisses like a man: MythDragon: pute kisses like a man: Banned on the Run: (18) "He would argue with a signpost."

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 850x588]

One of the best moments.

That and that Goddamn dinosaur raptor model I emptied a magazine into because I thought it was about to attack me.

ha!  yeah, i remember the first time doing that mission.  you're giving a whole big spiel about, get in, be quiet, don't kill anyone... and the very first thing you see is this goddamn dinosaur!  I totally opened up on the dinosaur... despite thinking... dinosaurs? wtf?

would have completely failed the necessity for stealth if that game was more cruel hearted.

fortunately, they knew it would scare the shiat out of people and kept it out of earshot from the night watchmen.  seriously, best written game ever.

Too bad it was painfully buggy. I couldn't run it on my modern machine because 4 gb of ram made it shiat its pants. I had to use my P4 instead and it loved to stutter.

i had some nostalgia and ran the game again recently on a windows 7 computer.  first off, you need to download the official patch, and then download the most recent fan based unofficial patch.  the unofficial patches are like miracles.

here's a link to the steam forum that links to the different patchs, and provides other information on getting it to run on a newer computer

http://forums.steampowered.com/forums/sh owthread.php?s=cf9cc56e3e393db 460eb6144a3f9b589&t=2025035

i played through it recently and didn't have any problems... well, almost no problems.. for some reason, doors opened really slowly.  but, that was completely tolerable in the face of the awesomeness of blood boiling people and delving into madness, talking to stop signs and tvs.


I'll have to try that. I got it off Steam and gave the P4 to my daughter a while back.
 
2013-06-26 03:08:50 PM

TheKingOfMexico: Somewhere along the line, it became gauche to admit that we work to earn money. Employers seem to really believe that I am supposed to be deeply passionate about shuffling papers and meaningless busywork, and that the pay should only matter as a means to facilitate my dream of shuffling more paper. If you ask about the pay too soon, that earmarks you as someone who cares more about yourself than you do about the company and your "team."

Of course that's true, but you can't say it in 2013.

The white collar world is just pure, unadulterated nonsense these days. Pure. Nonsense.


Bingo.  Every company wants to have the pretty little illusion that you want nothing more in the world than to work for their company and only their company, that the job they are offering you or have hired you for is your lifetime ambition, and that you deeply and passionately "believe" in the company.

The idea that you're there just to get a paycheck, or worse, there as a career stepping stone, is anathema.  They don't just want loyal employees (for pittance wages), they want obedient cultists.
 
Displayed 15 of 115 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report