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(Slate)   Dear Prudie, sure I killed a guy, but do my in-laws have to be such dicks about it?   (slate.com) divider line 36
    More: Amusing, Emily Yoffe, marriage counsels, a history of violence  
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19167 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jun 2013 at 1:19 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Archived thread
2013-06-25 01:39:15 PM  
7 votes:
Or you could see this as a blessing in disguise.  No honey, I won't go to anymore in law family functions, they don't want me there, and I will respect that.  Have fun honey, send them my love.  *cracks beer, turns on game and kicks up feet*
2013-06-25 12:48:56 PM  
6 votes:
Simple solution: just start calling your brother-in-law a rapist. He's probably had sex at some point in his life, so if what you did makes you a killer, what he did makes him a rapist
2013-06-25 11:58:56 AM  
5 votes:
Sounds like his family and friends are a bunch of assholes. Should he have just let the intruder kill him or another loved one? Would that have been more acceptable?

AND WHO THE FARK IS PRUDIE?!
2013-06-25 11:34:38 AM  
5 votes:
I understand our country is divided over many issues, guns particularly among them, but surely even the most ardent gun-control activist can recognize that when an armed intruder is in your house, Robert's Rules of Order do not apply.

I don't understand where she get this. The guy didn't say he was armed. He said the intruder was armed. We don't even know if a gunshot was involved, merely that there was a struggle resulting in the intruder's death. I just find it an odd thing to infer.
2013-06-25 01:33:15 PM  
4 votes:
Sounds like his brother in law needs to have his ass kicked at the very least sued for slander.
2013-06-25 01:47:33 PM  
3 votes:
If your in-laws are treating you like shiat and your partner doesn't step up to the plate to defend you then you should be happy that they won't be your in-laws for long.
2013-06-25 01:32:18 PM  
3 votes:

ArkAngel: Simple solution: just start calling your brother-in-law a rapist. He's probably had sex at some point in his life, so if what you did makes you a killer, what he did makes him a rapist


I like that approach, but truthfully he is a killer. What he isn't is a murderer.
2013-06-25 01:28:10 PM  
3 votes:

ArkAngel: Simple solution: just start calling your brother-in-law a rapist. He's probably had sex at some point in his life, so if what you did makes you a killer, what he did makes him a rapist


Fire with fire, I like it.
2013-06-25 12:31:08 PM  
3 votes:
I would think that killing a man would at least get your inlaws to be a little politer to you.
2013-06-25 12:28:55 PM  
3 votes:

LlamaGirl: Sounds like his family and friends are a bunch of assholes. Should he have just let the intruder kill him or another loved one? Would that have been more acceptable?

AND WHO THE FARK IS PRUDIE?!


You've been on Fark since 2007?  She's a Fark regular, almost a celebrity.  Kind of the Ric Romero of advice columnists.
2013-06-25 11:43:16 AM  
3 votes:
I can kind of see both sides to this issue, having had personal experience with using lethal force against a home invasion.  It was a terrible, traumatic thing, even if it didn't cause actual injury; luckily, the homeowner was too groggy from being woken up in the night to shoot straight, and I managed to get away.

Pro-tip: keep an eye out for pet toys on the floor, those little squeaky things can make a lot of noise when you're not expecting it.
2013-06-25 04:11:46 PM  
2 votes:

jayphat: special20: Alonjar: [...] America has some of the best police and forensics in the world, hands down.

What "America" do you live in? Is it near Scotland Yard, or somewhere close to Interpol?

My thought exactly. This is the same America where a Sheriff ruled a mans death a suicide because they found a note. Nevermind the fact he shot himself three times. With a bolt action rifle.


Anecdotes are not data.
2013-06-25 01:57:28 PM  
2 votes:

Egoy3k: If your in-laws are treating you like shiat and your partner doesn't step up to the plate to defend you then you should be happy that they won't be your in-laws for long.


This. Something about this also tells me the in-laws were douches before, too, and this is just their excuse to take it to a new level. The guy should count this as a blessing to rid himself of these people (rather than continue to feel obligated to interact with them due to being married). And if he does stay married, well, I'd say he's pretty much done with family gatherings due to the in-laws, but I'd bet long term a divorce is in the works if she's going to side with them over her husband.
2013-06-25 01:53:14 PM  
2 votes:
libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com

www.examiner.com

code-interactive.com

forums.pelicanparts.com
2013-06-25 01:12:10 PM  
2 votes:
You're all missing the important part of TFA:

Dear Prudence: Errant Dildo
2013-06-25 12:33:30 PM  
2 votes:

God Is My Co-Pirate: I would think that killing a man would at least get your inlaws to be a little politer to you.


You would think that people who don't want their cars damaged wouldn't park in two spaces, too.
2013-06-25 11:49:38 AM  
2 votes:

Sybarite: I understand our country is divided over many issues, guns particularly among them, but surely even the most ardent gun-control activist can recognize that when an armed intruder is in your house, Robert's Rules of Order do not apply.

I don't understand where she get this. The guy didn't say he was armed. He said the intruder was armed. We don't even know if a gunshot was involved, merely that there was a struggle resulting in the intruder's death. I just find it an odd thing to infer.


Yeah she jumped to conclusions there, but really I think it was an excuse for her to use their Amazon reseller link.
2013-06-26 11:35:57 AM  
1 votes:

DeadPuppySociety: Devo: Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]

[www.examiner.com image 275x585]

[code-interactive.com image 403x403]

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]

How does a universal background check prevent people from protecting themselves?

What if I'm a reformed Crip, protecting the members of the midnight basketball program I use to mentor at risk youth in conflict resolution from my former partners in crime who want me dead for forsaking their violent ways?


Are you honestly suggesting that if Universal background check will prevent your former partners in crime from importing unregistered guns along with their unregistered drugs?

Or are you suggesting that by creating a Database they will somehow be hypnotically compelled to rat themselves out in order to populate it?

Or are you suggesting that by having a Database full of registered guns, they will not attack you with their unregistered guns because (you fill in the blank please)
2013-06-25 03:57:44 PM  
1 votes:
The US has been at war in Afghanistan for 12 years. There are going to be quite a few people who've killed some people by now, I'd imagine. My advice is to not bring it up until they do. PTSD's a bugger.
2013-06-25 02:45:27 PM  
1 votes:

MythDragon: Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]

[www.examiner.com image 275x585]

[code-interactive.com image 403x403]

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]


[i1.wp.com image 640x362]


That's got to be a 'shop job, right? I mean, not even the Brady Campaign folks could be that pants-on-head.
2013-06-25 02:18:33 PM  
1 votes:

brantgoose: Any hoo, you are part of a big club, no pun intended. A lot of Americans have killed and would kill again given the opportunity. While trying to confirm my stat above, I discovered that North America accounts for 80% of serial killers, while Europe only accounts for 16%. Everybody else: Africa, Asia, South America, and presumably Australia and Antarctica, account for 4%.


Those are convicted or known serial killers... its not that America has more of them, its that America is way, way better at tracking and catching them.  In Europe its too easy to just jump between jurisdictions for your killings, and in places like Africa and South America the police just dont give a shiat.

As much as Fark loves to hate on cops, America has some of the best police and forensics in the world, hands down.
2013-06-25 02:10:41 PM  
1 votes:
 As someone who has been forced into killing a person before, I had the exact opposite effect occur - my wife's redneck family always thought I was a 'pussy' and even more unforgivably a 'college boy'. After the shooting, they warmed up to me like an old friend and I was suddenly one of them, because I 'proved I had balls'. They seemed to genuinely celebrate it like a rite of passage.

 Now -THAT- was some creepy ass in-law treatment. Some people are just scary. In both directions. Just avoid them.
2013-06-25 02:10:07 PM  
1 votes:

Yes please: He had broken into my home, armed

The armed part is there, but she seems to have made this about guns completely on her own.  It's hardly surprising.  I came across three separate sources yesterday who were blaming the whole Aaron Hernandez situation on guns.


Another possibility is that an editor removed something relevant after the answer had been written.
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-06-25 02:08:55 PM  
1 votes:
whoisshewhoisshewhoisshe

forums.pelicanparts.com

it's a treadjack, but DAMN
2013-06-25 02:07:03 PM  
1 votes:

Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]

[www.examiner.com image 275x585]

[code-interactive.com image 403x403]

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]


I was going to ask you to move your posts to politics tab but that last pic... tasty.
2013-06-25 02:06:36 PM  
1 votes:
Dear Killer,

I read somewhere that one in 1,000 Americans is a murderer. I don't recall if they were counting self-defence or just illegal homicides. But when you walk down the street, these are the people that you meet, they are people that you meet each day. Sorry. Having a flashback to my Sesame Street watching days. Those were good times. I would have stayed at college forever if the money had held out.

Any hoo, you are part of a big club, no pun intended. A lot of Americans have killed and would kill again given the opportunity. While trying to confirm my stat above, I discovered that North America accounts for 80% of serial killers, while Europe only accounts for 16%. Everybody else: Africa, Asia, South America, and presumably Australia and Antarctica, account for 4%.

Makes you think. Clearly guns do not kill people. North Americans kill people. THEY SHOULD ALL BE LOCKED UP SAFELY WHERE THEY CAN'T HURT ANYBODY.

Hey, maybe that is why Obama has drones ready to kill every single damn one of us on the slightest whim of our heavily-screened security personnel. Well, I can't really say they are heavily-screened. I HOPE they are heavily-screened. Most of them are North Americans. They can't be trusted with a trigger. Or else why is Whatzit headed towards the relative safety of Ecuador?

But I digress.

Shoot everybody who looks at your sidewalk suspiciously. It's the only solution.

But back to your problem, Killer. Your inlaws are jerks. It might be considered justifiable homicide if you killed them all. But since you say that your wife is attached to some of the morans, here's what you do. Everytime you are out with some of your inlaws, play a little game. Try to guess who the murdererers are among the people that you meet. Take your inlaws to places where thousands of people are gathered, such as concerts, Veteran's Day parades, the Fourth of July and play the Guess Who the Murderers Are Game. Offer a gun or knife as a prize.

They'll get the message. Especially if you guess one of them, their friends or relatives. You do have expertise after all. Well, not really, but they won't think that.
2013-06-25 01:59:52 PM  
1 votes:
Fake stories are fake.

If not, as others have noted, hey, free out from dealing with her douchebag family.
2013-06-25 01:47:07 PM  
1 votes:
I once stabbed a teenager when he tried to mug me.

The kid was arrested a couple hours later when he showed up to a hospital seeking treatment. I was never charged with anything. Don't know what ended up happening to the kid.

Have I ever felt guilty about it? Nope.
Has anyone ever given me crap about it? Nope.

Fark em.
2013-06-25 01:45:23 PM  
1 votes:

Evil Mackerel: Sounds like his brother in law needs to have his ass kicked at the very least sued for slander.


Honestly, this is the kind of thing my family, which is full of caustic bastards on a good day, would never let up about.  It would start with all casual greetings of the brother-in-law in question being interspersed with straight-faced inquiries about whether he'd gotten any good loogies off at returning veterans that day, probably progress to jokes about some people helping keep up the safety record of the armed robbers' union by dinner-time, and probably go downhill from there.

This probably deserves more good-natured counter-ridicule than real offense, is what I'm saying here.  Probably the "killer" guy is offering it in that spirit (an in-family joke, traditionally insensitive to begin with) even if the douchebags keeping their kids away from him are legitimately awful people.  Keep talking to the ones that are worth talking to, cut ties with the ones that are wastes of oxygen, and move on.
2013-06-25 01:45:11 PM  
1 votes:

ArkAngel: Simple solution: just start calling your brother-in-law a rapist. He's probably had sex at some point in his life, so if what you did makes you a killer, what he did makes him a rapist


Seen this type of bullshiat.  The brother-in-law thinks he's a tough guy and now is insecure because he's now actually met someone who's killed someone so he's all insecure.

The big problem here is that he should have told them.  He should have sat them down and explained things to them.  It's not like suckers were hiding and jumping behind the bush when they saw him driving by, hanging out his window with his magnum taking out putos and generally acting kinda loco.  He should have told them that even through they may not be able to understand it, but once he just killed a man.
2013-06-25 01:44:43 PM  
1 votes:
Why is this "amusing?"  It's horrible that his wife's family is judging him for SAVING HIS OWN LIFE.  Those idiots would probably rather die than save their own lives.  Screw em.
2013-06-25 01:40:18 PM  
1 votes:
Solution: start saying stuff like "I would absolutely murder a gin and tonic right now" or "I would kill for a second helping of your delicious casserole" or "STFU or I will kill you too".

Seems fake. I can't really imagine anyone behaving this way. OTOH, if this were true I would guess that the "killer" is an absolute d-bag and this was the straw that broke the camels back.
2013-06-25 01:36:02 PM  
1 votes:

xanadian: You're all missing the important part of TFA:

Dear Prudence: Errant Dildo


I was just writing for advice on getting my Taylor Swift cover band started.
2013-06-25 12:37:06 PM  
1 votes:

BarkingUnicorn: God Is My Co-Pirate: I would think that killing a man would at least get your inlaws to be a little politer to you.

You would think that people who don't want their cars damaged wouldn't park in two spaces, too.


You would think that people who listen to terrible shiatty music wouldn't crank their car stereos the loudest.
2013-06-25 12:31:57 PM  
1 votes:
Prudie made this one up  to scold the pants-wetting guns-always-bad crowd.
2013-06-25 12:09:07 PM  
1 votes:

LlamaGirl: AND WHO THE FARK IS PRUDIE?!


You sound like you're not a quasi-feminist housewife who does nothing but read Slate all day
 
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