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(Slate)   Dear Prudie, sure I killed a guy, but do my in-laws have to be such dicks about it?   (slate.com) divider line 151
    More: Amusing, Emily Yoffe, marriage counsels, a history of violence  
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19181 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jun 2013 at 1:19 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



151 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-06-25 03:20:43 PM  
My sister was recently sent to federal prison (she deserved it).  Her ex's who were both afraid of her because she worked for the FBI, are opening cans of whoop'ass on her. 

 
Ex #1 was sent to jail twice during their divorce because he was late with child support.  My sister needed money a year or so ago so she opened some insurance policies on him and forged his name.  He is pursuing the insurance fraud charges.

 
Ex #2 was the primary mortgage holder on the house.He wanted to sign it in accordance with the divorce decree over to her but she never did her part of the paper work.She stopped paying the mortgage almost immediately after the divorce and has been screwing his credit up for 4 years.He's pushing the bank to foreclose on the house.  My two nephews are squatting there now.  They're both over 19 and work.  They'll be able to afford a two bedroom apartment without risking money for school but she'll be homeless.
 
2013-06-25 03:23:38 PM  

Satanic_Hamster: The big problem here is that he should have told them. He should have sat them down and explained things to them.


Why?

What business is it of theirs?
 
2013-06-25 03:33:05 PM  
Seems to me, most of Fark would be on the in-law's side, if you read the comments in the gun or self-defence threads. Maybe if the article specified he had a gun, you would be more antagonistic towards the guy.
 
2013-06-25 03:36:55 PM  
A burglar tried to jump me in my apartment once. If I had a knife handy I woulda stabbed him. And not feel terribly guilty about it.

\female
 
2013-06-25 03:47:35 PM  

JustGetItRight: Why?

What business is it of theirs?


So he could have told them something they just could not have understood.  How he could kill a man.

bomboclap.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-06-25 03:57:44 PM  
The US has been at war in Afghanistan for 12 years. There are going to be quite a few people who've killed some people by now, I'd imagine. My advice is to not bring it up until they do. PTSD's a bugger.
 
2013-06-25 04:01:46 PM  

special20: Alonjar: [...] America has some of the best police and forensics in the world, hands down.

What "America" do you live in? Is it near Scotland Yard, or somewhere close to Interpol?


Las Vegas, New York, and (puts on sunglasses) Miami.
Yeeeeaaaaaaaaah!
 
2013-06-25 04:03:38 PM  
i.imgur.com

Whoa...Its Kiler
 
2013-06-25 04:08:10 PM  

Gordon Bennett: I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.


Sometimes I wear all black to work, and a colleague once made the comment that I looked like Johnny Cash. I replied "I've never been to Reno, so you can't blame me for it!"
 
2013-06-25 04:09:46 PM  

special20: Alonjar: [...] America has some of the best police and forensics in the world, hands down.

What "America" do you live in? Is it near Scotland Yard, or somewhere close to Interpol?


My thought exactly. This is the same America where a Sheriff ruled a mans death a suicide because they found a note. Nevermind the fact he shot himself three times. With a bolt action rifle.
 
2013-06-25 04:11:18 PM  

Satanic_Hamster: The big problem here is that he should have told them. He should have sat them down and explained things to them. It's not like suckers were hiding and jumping behind the bush when they saw him driving by, hanging out his window with his magnum taking out putos and generally acting kinda loco. He should have told them that even through they may not be able to understand it, but once he just killed a man.


When one-time tries to come in your home, you gotta to take your chrome, and say "Yo, it's on. Take cover son, or you're ass-out. How you like my chrome?" Then watch the rookie pass out. You don't have to blast him, but I would anyway.

lol. That young punk has to pay.
 
2013-06-25 04:11:46 PM  

jayphat: special20: Alonjar: [...] America has some of the best police and forensics in the world, hands down.

What "America" do you live in? Is it near Scotland Yard, or somewhere close to Interpol?

My thought exactly. This is the same America where a Sheriff ruled a mans death a suicide because they found a note. Nevermind the fact he shot himself three times. With a bolt action rifle.


Anecdotes are not data.
 
2013-06-25 04:29:16 PM  

LeroyBourne: Or you could see this as a blessing in disguise.  No honey, I won't go to anymore in law family functions, they don't want me there, and I will respect that.  Have fun honey, send them my love.  *cracks beer, turns on game and kicks up feet*


I might actually kill someone just so I can use this excuse.  Jeebus knows I've wanted to kill myself at so many in-law functions.  Maybe the state would let me push the button for an execution.
 
2013-06-25 04:31:40 PM  

JesseL: ArkAngel: Simple solution: just start calling your brother-in-law a rapist. He's probably had sex at some point in his life, so if what you did makes you a killer, what he did makes him a rapist

I like that approach, but truthfully he is a killer. What he isn't is a murderer.


Change rapist to farker then.
 
2013-06-25 04:32:26 PM  

Muta: My sister was recently sent to federal prison (she deserved it).  Her ex's who were both afraid of her because she worked for the FBI, are opening cans of whoop'ass on her. 

 
Ex #1 was sent to jail twice during their divorce because he was late with child support.  My sister needed money a year or so ago so she opened some insurance policies on him and forged his name.  He is pursuing the insurance fraud charges.

 
Ex #2 was the primary mortgage holder on the house.He wanted to sign it in accordance with the divorce decree over to her but she never did her part of the paper work.She stopped paying the mortgage almost immediately after the divorce and has been screwing his credit up for 4 years.He's pushing the bank to foreclose on the house.  My two nephews are squatting there now.  They're both over 19 and work.  They'll be able to afford a two bedroom apartment without risking money for school but she'll be homeless.


Oh, OK.
 
2013-06-25 04:34:51 PM  

Egoy3k: MythDragon: Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]
[www.examiner.com image 275x585]
[code-interactive.com image 403x403]
[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]
[i1.wp.com image 640x362]


I support sensible gun laws but that right there is offensive.

I seconded that!

/Technically Obama has loosened gun rights, not made them more restrictive
 
2013-06-25 04:44:41 PM  

kortex: Why is this "amusing?"  It's horrible that his wife's family is judging him for SAVING HIS OWN LIFE.  Those idiots would probably rather die than save their own lives.  Screw em.


Well to be fair the police report DID conclude self defense, but a few of the crime scene investigators question whether  it was strictly necessary for the letter writer to completely flay the other man alive in the process of defending himself, and the thought that while not strictly criminal, stuffing the man's testicles in his mouth to choke him to death after cutting them off  WAS a bit over the top
 
2013-06-25 04:49:50 PM  

stbookworm: Egoy3k: I support sensible gun laws but that right there is offensive.

I seconded that!

/Technically Obama has loosened gun rights, not made them more restrictive


Please elaborate upon that last statement.
 
2013-06-25 04:51:02 PM  
Subby likes misleading titles, don't he.
 
2013-06-25 04:54:59 PM  

The_Mad_Dutchman: Seems to me, most of Fark would be on the in-law's side, if you only read the comments in the gun or self-defence threads that you want to see. Maybe if the article specified he had a gun, you would be more antagonistic towards the guy.


FTFY
 
2013-06-25 05:03:36 PM  

Magorn: kortex: Why is this "amusing?"  It's horrible that his wife's family is judging him for SAVING HIS OWN LIFE.  Those idiots would probably rather die than save their own lives.  Screw em.

Well to be fair the police report DID conclude self defense, but a few of the crime scene investigators question whether  it was strictly necessary for the letter writer to completely flay the other man alive in the process of defending himself, and the thought that while not strictly criminal, stuffing the man's testicles in his mouth to choke him to death after cutting them off  WAS a bit over the top


You got a link for that? That sounds like a helluva story.
 
2013-06-25 05:09:32 PM  

Lev_Astov: /Technically Obama has loosened gun rights, not made them more restrictive

Please elaborate upon that last statement.


You can now bring guns into national parks, and on Amtrak trains. Thanks, Obama.
 
2013-06-25 05:17:38 PM  

Satanic_Hamster: ArkAngel: Simple solution: just start calling your brother-in-law a rapist. He's probably had sex at some point in his life, so if what you did makes you a killer, what he did makes him a rapist

Seen this type of bullshiat.  The brother-in-law thinks he's a tough guy and now is insecure because he's now actually met someone who's killed someone so he's all insecure.

The big problem here is that he should have told them.  He should have sat them down and explained things to them.  It's not like suckers were hiding and jumping behind the bush when they saw him driving by, hanging out his window with his magnum taking out putos and generally acting kinda loco.  He should have told them that even through they may not be able to understand it, but once he just killed a man.


I just don't understand.
 
2013-06-25 05:20:56 PM  

MythDragon: Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]

[www.examiner.com image 275x585]

[code-interactive.com image 403x403]

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]


[i1.wp.com image 640x362]


that's a parody, in case you didn't know. Probably you did, and I didn't and had to google it. Carry on.
 
HBK
2013-06-25 05:22:11 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: Egoy3k: If your in-laws are treating you like shiat and your partner doesn't step up to the plate to defend you then you should be happy that they won't be your in-laws for long.

I had one such conversation with my mother when she got pissy with my fiancee'.

"Mom, you're not going to talk to her like that."
"I'll talk any way I want!   You're my SON!"
"And this is our home... hers and mine."
"Then I'll LEAVE your home!"
"Here's your suitcase.  There's the door."

Fiancee' was appalled that I let my mother go look for a taxi while dragging a suitcase.

"She's gotta learn now or it'll be Hell after we're married."

/didn't marry that one
//mom was much nicer to the one i married


Sounds like your mom was on to something.

My mom and I had a similar fight because my mom thought my girlfriend at the time was a total biatch. It turned out my mom was right.
 
2013-06-25 05:42:54 PM  

meanmutton: Walt


lol yeah - it's a great ep! Also very apt in light of TFA.
 
2013-06-25 06:00:38 PM  

HBK: BarkingUnicorn: Egoy3k: If your in-laws are treating you like shiat and your partner doesn't step up to the plate to defend you then you should be happy that they won't be your in-laws for long.

I had one such conversation with my mother when she got pissy with my fiancee'.

"Mom, you're not going to talk to her like that."
"I'll talk any way I want!   You're my SON!"
"And this is our home... hers and mine."
"Then I'll LEAVE your home!"
"Here's your suitcase.  There's the door."

Fiancee' was appalled that I let my mother go look for a taxi while dragging a suitcase.

"She's gotta learn now or it'll be Hell after we're married."

/didn't marry that one
//mom was much nicer to the one i married

Sounds like your mom was on to something.

My mom and I had a similar fight because my mom thought my girlfriend at the time was a total biatch. It turned out my mom was right.


The one I married turned out to be the biatch.  The one I didn't marry was a renegade Mormon who could suck-start a Harley and loved to make sammiches.
 
2013-06-25 06:14:48 PM  

Cynicism101: MythDragon: Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]

[www.examiner.com image 275x585]

[code-interactive.com image 403x403]

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]


[i1.wp.com image 640x362]

that's a parody, in case you didn't know. Probably you did, and I didn't and had to google it. Carry on.


Sad thing is that you have to think about it. You say "there's *no* way the Brady campaign could do that" then you think, "but then again...."
 
2013-06-25 06:39:04 PM  

Devo: Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]

[www.examiner.com image 275x585]

[code-interactive.com image 403x403]

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]

How does a universal background check prevent people from protecting themselves?


Putting aside that it costs money that some poorer folks won't have to spare, thus denying them the ability to protect themselves, the more important, and the only relevant one really, is....

How does a universal background check stop criminals from getting guns?

Since I can practically guarantee you haven't done ANY research into the efficacy of such laws, you won't be able to honestly answer that question. Will you? So why would you advocate for something that you have objective reason to believe will be effective at it's stated (but not actual) goal.

Speaking of actual goals... A large part of why people are against background check laws is because they can't be enforced without universal registration, and there has never been universal registration in any country without eventual confiscation. Not to mention that full or considerable confiscation is the stated goal of many of the politicians pushing these background check laws. There is no reason to believe people with such stated goals will stop at background checks. Each time they make a law and it doesn't work they will just make the next stupid law that won't work until they get what they really want.

And if you doubt me, just read this:

http://freedomoutpost.com/2013/02/dems-sponsor-bill-to-violate-fourt h- amendment-rights-of-gun-owners/

That was a bill submitted 3 years in a row in Washington State that, if it passed, would have allowed the local sheriff to search most gun owners homes without a warrant. So in order to maintain you second amendment rights you would have to give up your fourth. That is like saying the only way you can speak out against the government is if you first board soldiers in your own home. (One internet to you if you can name both amendments I just referenced off the top of your head).

Another state had a background check bill that was originally so poorly written that if you were selling a gun to someone and they passed the check, but they weren't actually legally eligible to own a gun (so if the system failed), you would still be committing a crime by selling them the gun. In other words, it offered NO protection to the seller at all when the system screwed up.

Look at the Colorado magazine law that passed. It is driving multiple businesses out of the state, turning away millions of dollars of tourism, has caused a few state senators to have formal recalls started on them, and all for a law which is so poorly written that it effectively makes all magazines, of any size, illegal to constructively possess after July 1st. For instance, lets say I have a 1911 with an 8 round magazine. Such a magazine (all magazines really) can be modified to hold more than 15 rounds. Therefore it falls under the states new law. Therefore I can not buy a new 1911 magazine in the state after July 1st. In addition, I can't let anyone (not even my wife), EVER, do the following:

Hold any of my magazines.
Hold my gun while a magazine is in it.
Be in a room with my magazines while they are unsecured.
Know the combination, or hold the key, to the safe where my magazines are properly secured.
Assist me with a jam at a gun range while the magazine is in the gun.
Let a police officer return my gun to me after he takes possession of it during an officer safety search. He has to take the magazine out first and keep it, because I can't have it back.
Let an ambulance medic remove my gun belt if assisting me in a medical emergency.
Wrestle a firearm with a magazine in it away from an attacker so I can stop him a/o defend myself with the gun. If I do get it out of his hands, I have to drop it immediately.

If any of these things happens NOBODY except a police officer can touch the gun to remove the magazine or touch the magazine after it has been removed, and I am required to turn the magazines over to a police officer as soon as any of these things occur. And, btw, all this applies to police officers personally owned weapons as well. Only their service weapons and magazines that are being moved by them in the line of duty are immune.

This is what happens when you let people who don't understand anything about a subject make up random stupid laws about it. Heck... One Colorado senator who was heavily involved in making this law was so ignorant she thought magazines were 1 time use only.

So that is why people's rights advocates are so against universal background checks... It hasn't been shown to work (all indications are it won't), it is just another stepping stone to the top advocates true goal of full confiscation, and the people passing these laws don't understand the subject matter, so we certainly don't trust them to make a law that will actually work anyway.
 
2013-06-25 06:49:52 PM  

NutWrench: Lifeless: d23: whoisshewhoisshewhoisshe

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]

it's a treadjack, but DAMN

Anna Song.  Also goes by Tanya.

Thank you. :)


And.... Looks like yet another farker just lived up to their name.
 
2013-06-25 06:54:55 PM  

Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]

[www.examiner.com image 275x585]

[code-interactive.com image 403x403]

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]


So, pictures of fake things?
 
2013-06-25 07:01:06 PM  

MythDragon: Cynicism101: MythDragon: Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]

[www.examiner.com image 275x585]

[code-interactive.com image 403x403]

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]


[i1.wp.com image 640x362]

that's a parody, in case you didn't know. Probably you did, and I didn't and had to google it. Carry on.

Sad thing is that you have to think about it. You say "there's *no* way the Brady campaign could do that" then you think, "but then again...."


The reason you can picture it is because you know that they know that if they got everything they wanted more women being raped would be the direct, and immediate, result. So whether they make the signs or not, it is what they are advocating.
 
2013-06-25 07:10:05 PM  
Dear Prudie is the new FarkTV
 
2013-06-25 07:15:21 PM  

Begoggle: Dear Prudie is the new FarkTV


Now that is something I would pay to watch. So long as the acting was top notch.
 
2013-06-25 07:22:02 PM  
Like others have mentioned, this sounds like a good excuse to never see the in-laws and consider them having done you a favor (since they sound like a bunch of assholes).

It's not like he can do anything about it now. Can't go back in time and unkill the guy.
 
2013-06-25 07:31:45 PM  
The really interesting Prudie item was below:

Q. Sexuality After Childbirth: Since giving birth to my first child six months ago, I've become very uncomfortable with my sexuality. I have a wonderful partner and there is no tension in the relationship, but I now have an aversion to the idea of having sex. Besides being afraid of the physical act after the usual childbirth injuries, I keep thinking about all the sexual violence I've read or heard about in the news. If I think about sex, I want to put it out of my mind and gather up my baby and protect her. What should I do to get back to normal?

A: Please contact your gynecologist right away and describe what's going on with you. This sounds like it could be a postpartum depression and you want to attend to this immediately. Sometimes this disorder manifests as terror of bad things happening to your child and dwelling on all that's terrible in the world. You also need a thorough physical checkup and advice on postpartum sexuality and recovery from any birth trauma. Please do this today. There is help available for you, and you should be enjoying this sweet and tender time of life, not living in dread.


My personal response:

A: Just as men are biologically driven to copulate with multiple partners, women are prone to sabotaging their marriages after the birth of a child. This is not a bad thing, as driving away your good man makes him available to copulate with all the hundreds of other women out there who want to have sex with him. Since you've obviously withdrawn already, you can assume that he is getting hot wild sex from your sister or the horny lady next door. And just watch, after you've driven him away, how quickly you will regain your desire for sex, but will not have any man around to satisfy your newly recovered libido. So go with your gut feelings and continue to detest sex with the only guy who ever really did or ever will care about you. Push him away from your cold, sour vagina and into the warm and caring arms of other women. It's how God made you. It's how nature intends things to be. Prepare to live alone and to die alone.
 
2013-06-25 07:32:49 PM  

jayphat: Begoggle: Dear Prudie is the new FarkTV

Now that is something I would pay to watch. So long as the acting was top notch.


How dare you bring mention that Ill-conceived abortion that was FarkTV...
 
2013-06-25 07:34:26 PM  

toraque: I can kind of see both sides to this issue, having had personal experience with using lethal force against a home invasion.  It was a terrible, traumatic thing, even if it didn't cause actual injury; luckily, the homeowner was too groggy from being woken up in the night to shoot straight, and I managed to get away.

Pro-tip: keep an eye out for pet toys on the floor, those little squeaky things can make a lot of noise when you're not expecting it.


"applause" :-D
 
2013-06-25 07:37:55 PM  

LlamaGirl: Sounds like his family and friends are a bunch of assholes. Should he have just let the intruder kill him or another loved one? Would that have been more acceptable?

AND WHO THE FARK IS PRUDIE?!


Wayne LaPierre's pseudonym.
 
2013-06-25 07:46:17 PM  

Devo: Dadoody: [libertyendanger.files.wordpress.com image 400x211]

[www.examiner.com image 275x585]

[code-interactive.com image 403x403]

[forums.pelicanparts.com image 500x716]

How does a universal background check prevent people from protecting themselves?


What if I'm a reformed Crip, protecting the members of the midnight basketball program I use to mentor at risk youth in conflict resolution from my former partners in crime who want me dead for forsaking their violent ways?
 
2013-06-25 07:54:15 PM  

Egoy3k: jayphat: special20: Alonjar: [...] America has some of the best police and forensics in the world, hands down.

What "America" do you live in? Is it near Scotland Yard, or somewhere close to Interpol?

My thought exactly. This is the same America where a Sheriff ruled a mans death a suicide because they found a note. Nevermind the fact he shot himself three times. With a bolt action rifle.

Anecdotes are not data.


What internet are YOU on?
 
2013-06-25 07:55:19 PM  

DeadPuppySociety: What if I'm a reformed Crip, protecting the members of the midnight basketball program I use to mentor at risk youth in conflict resolution from my former partners in crime who want me dead for forsaking their violent ways?


I'd watch that if it were on HBO.
 
2013-06-25 08:08:56 PM  

Walt_Jizzney: jayphat: Begoggle: Dear Prudie is the new FarkTV

Now that is something I would pay to watch. So long as the acting was top notch.

How dare you bring mention that Ill-conceived abortion that was FarkTV...


A) I've never seen FarkTV
B)I was referring to Dear Prudie as a TV show done by Farkers.
 
2013-06-25 08:16:57 PM  

SpiderQueenDemon: DeadPuppySociety: What if I'm a reformed Crip, protecting the members of the midnight basketball program I use to mentor at risk youth in conflict resolution from my former partners in crime who want me dead for forsaking their violent ways?

I'd watch that if it were on HBO.


Hey, you posted a long CSS a while back about making a sale on the floor while working retail and how if you listened to what a customer was really trying to say instead of going through the motions, you'd make a loyal repeat buyer instead of a apathetic bargain hunter. He turned out to be a big honcho and always came back to you thereafter.

I really enjoyed it and thought it was spot on, so i wanted to say thanks, since i didn't respond in that thread.
 
2013-06-25 08:46:55 PM  

willfullyobscure: Hey, you posted a long CSS a while back about making a sale on the floor while working retail and how if you listened to what a customer was really trying to say instead of going through the motions, you'd make a loyal repeat buyer instead of a apathetic bargain hunter. He turned out to be a big honcho and always came back to you thereafter.

I really enjoyed it and thought it was spot on, so i wanted to say thanks, since i didn't respond in that thread.


Aww, I appreciate that! Days like that were the one thing that made that job tolerable. I really don't miss retail.
 
2013-06-25 10:12:16 PM  

SpiderQueenDemon: willfullyobscure: Hey, you posted a long CSS a while back about making a sale on the floor while working retail and how if you listened to what a customer was really trying to say instead of going through the motions, you'd make a loyal repeat buyer instead of a apathetic bargain hunter. He turned out to be a big honcho and always came back to you thereafter.

I really enjoyed it and thought it was spot on, so i wanted to say thanks, since i didn't respond in that thread.

Aww, I appreciate that! Days like that were the one thing that made that job tolerable. I really don't miss retail.


defo. retail sucks ass. everyone needs to do as a trial by fire before they say asinine shiat about the job market.
 
2013-06-26 12:35:27 AM  

jayphat: special20: Alonjar: [...] America has some of the best police and forensics in the world, hands down.

What "America" do you live in? Is it near Scotland Yard, or somewhere close to Interpol?

My thought exactly. This is the same America where a Sheriff ruled a mans death a suicide because they found a note. Nevermind the fact he shot himself three times. With a bolt action rifle.


Thats funny. Back in rural WV, there was a suicide where the guy managed to behead himself while his hands were cuffed behind his back. Of course, there was some sort of land deal involved with the county getting his property. You also shouldn't challenge the deputies monopoly on certain drugs in that county either.

 Could have been either one that made him so despondent as to hack his own head off that way...
 
2013-06-26 01:57:26 AM  

gfid: You have been trolled, don't you?

It's Slate for one thing.;  For another an article about a dead burglar decades ago is not going to be found by "idle googling".


I wonder if there are better keywords one could use? Like a name maybe?
 
2013-06-26 02:27:06 AM  
For those confused on the extra detail in "Prudie's" response, the observant may note that the headline indicates it was a live chat, not just an email. Ergo, the 'letter' is a condensation of the words of the conversation in order to maintain the column's format.
 
2013-06-26 04:45:48 AM  

starsrift: For those confused on the extra detail in "Prudie's" response, the observant may note that the headline indicates it was a live chat, not just an email. Ergo, the 'letter' is a condensation of the words of the conversation in order to maintain the column's format.


i.e.: This letter has been modified from its original version. It has been formatted to fit the minds of our readers.
 
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