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(BusinessWeek)   Taco Bell to debut new "protein" menu in Ohio this July. Protein is their new code word for "synthetic meat"   (businessweek.com) divider line 108
    More: Sick, Taco Bell, Ohio, Yum!, proteins, code words  
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8129 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jun 2013 at 2:22 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-25 12:17:29 AM
Taco Bell hate

0-media-cdn.foolz.us
 
2013-06-25 12:37:07 AM
Soylent Green is PEOPLE!
 
2013-06-25 12:46:04 AM
FTA:

On July 25, Taco Bell will start testing a new "Power Protein" menu in Ohio aimed at health-conscious consumers. It will include items with more than 20 grams of protein and less than 450 calories per serving, such as a burrito and a bowl, both served with a double portion of chicken or steak.

Words like "synthetic" or "artificial" do not occur in TFA. IOW, Subby is making shiat up.
 
2013-06-25 01:17:25 AM
My mom still cooks like this. Entrees are based on the nutrients they provide. You have the protein, starch, chlorophyll, and dishes also named after the primary vitamin or mineral they provided. Why yes, she also was a computer programmer who wrote in assembly and other languages.
 
2013-06-25 02:22:53 AM
Better than a liquid, I guess.
 
2013-06-25 02:24:45 AM
Fark that. When I go to Taco Bell I expect quality.
 
2013-06-25 02:28:30 AM

Makh: My mom still cooks like this. Entrees are based on the nutrients they provide. You have the protein, starch, chlorophyll, and dishes also named after the primary vitamin or mineral they provided. Why yes, she also was a computer programmer who wrote in assembly and other languages.


I wanna party with you, dude. (cause I wanna meet your mom...hook me up, bro.)
 
2013-06-25 02:29:05 AM
but do they have potato oles?

no. no they do not
 
2013-06-25 02:30:34 AM
i3.kym-cdn.com
 
2013-06-25 02:31:00 AM
Health-conscious consumers... in Ohio?
Good luck with that.
 
2013-06-25 02:31:12 AM
Where is the vat meat?
 
2013-06-25 02:31:57 AM

FunkOut: Where is the vat meat?


In my pants.
 
2013-06-25 02:32:15 AM
To be fair, you refer to all meat as protein in culinary school.
 
2013-06-25 02:33:32 AM
I suggest they all just start using the animal it comes from.  Cow, pig, or chicken.  No ambiguity.
 
2013-06-25 02:33:39 AM
Funny, I thought the protein came in the "special sauce"
 
2013-06-25 02:33:44 AM
TVP duh....
 
2013-06-25 02:34:41 AM

Omahawg: but do they have potato oles?

no. no they do not


Not one taco bell does taco tuesday like taco johns can.
 
2013-06-25 02:36:15 AM
I'll give them a pass.
Does it contain protein? yes.
Where does it come from?  Did I ever tell you about the time that I spent at the crematorium in Botswana...
 
2013-06-25 02:36:31 AM
My bunghole is puckering at the thought.
 
2013-06-25 02:36:38 AM

cheap_thoughts: Omahawg: but do they have potato oles?

no. no they do not

Not one taco bell does taco tuesday like taco johns can.


Wendy can, when she's swallowing Carl's Jr.
 
2013-06-25 02:36:53 AM

Ryker's Peninsula: Health-conscious consumers... in Ohio?
Good luck with that.


I hate to see a perfectly innocent mass of land with invisible lines telling it where it ends and sanity begins pissed on like this.

/trying to escape to the Pitt in the next month or so.
 
2013-06-25 02:39:18 AM
Saliva's a protein, right?

www.inquisitr.com
 
2013-06-25 02:41:03 AM
"Before we begin eating, you must all be warned: Nothing here... is vegetarian. Bon appétit."
/Obscure?
 
2013-06-25 02:41:56 AM
43 percent of conversations about "meat" over the last six months were negative and often included such words as "bad," "concerns," and "problem."
On the other hand, only 6 percent of conversations about "protein" were negative. Most people associated it with words like "good", "healthy," and "delicious." The result: Some 91 percent of conversations about the "Power Protein" menu have been positive..."


And so the cycle begins anew. Marketers have found a new word to destroy, and soon "protein" will be something smart consumers will have to be wary of.
 
2013-06-25 02:42:19 AM

HotWingAgenda: I suggest they all just start using the animal it comes from.  Cow, pig, or chicken.  No ambiguity.


Nah. Think smaller. More legs.
 
2013-06-25 02:43:54 AM
 Data from Infegy-a company that analyzes user-generated content on blogs, social-media accounts, and other online sources-shows that 43 percent of conversations about "meat" over the last six months were negative and often included such words as "bad," "concerns," and "problem."

On the other hand, only 6 percent of conversations about "protein" were negative. Most people associated it with words like "good", "healthy," and "delicious." The result: Some 91 percent of conversations about the "Power Protein" menu have been positive, according to Infegy.


Marketers are pieces of shiat.

There. Datamine that.
 
2013-06-25 02:44:42 AM

FunkOut: Where is the vat meat?


They actually have made it, it's just currently too expensive for mass production. Once they're able to make it efficiently I'll be all over that.
 
2013-06-25 02:47:19 AM

God-is-a-Taco: Marketers have found a new word to destroy, and soon "protein" will be something smart consumers will have to be wary of.

I know you are exaggerating a bit, but I wouldn't too crazy surprised if some comestibles touted protein free as a benefiteventually..
 
2013-06-25 02:48:55 AM
Eh, marketting, who cares. There is no Taco Bell where I live. You bet your ass the next time I see a Taco Bell I am not ordering from the 'Fresco' menu.

(And as for subby slapping the word 'synthetic meat' on this, what, like you've never had a veggie burger? Congratulations, there's your synthetic meat.)
 
2013-06-25 02:51:26 AM

Doomed: Eh, marketting, who cares.


Considering they use the same methods to guide political campaigns and statements, I do.
 
2013-06-25 02:53:35 AM

berylman: God-is-a-Taco: Marketers have found a new word to destroy, and soon "protein" will be something smart consumers will have to be wary of.
I know you are exaggerating a bit, but I wouldn't too crazy surprised if some comestibles touted protein free as a benefiteventually..


2012.riverrunfilm.com
1973 called.....
 
2013-06-25 02:55:58 AM
I'm all for pink slime.  No more dangerous than eating the processed chunks of flesh off an animal, it all depends on how well procedures are followed and quality control. No qualms about where it came from at any rate.  May taste terrible and have the consistency of my beer shiats, in which case I'll not try it but once.  But I won't exile it based on it's source, which is still animal flesh.

Mystery protein though?

Does it come from plants? Tofu? Rats? Fermented man goo?

No thanks.  Not only may it be risky based on source(hoof and mouth, ring worm, dung beetle scrapings, ecoli whatever), but a lot of people have allergies to a wide variety of things.

bwilson27: FunkOut: Where is the vat meat?

In my pants.


No, Vat meat, not fat meat.  I mean, we all know your manhood resembles a flaccid tuna can embedded deep within Micheal Moore's cavernous belly button.  No need to front man, it's the internet, no one actually cares.
 
2013-06-25 02:57:25 AM
I got your protein, right here! Oh!
 
2013-06-25 02:57:49 AM

lohphat: Saliva's a protein, right?


Water and mucus. It's more of a saccharide.
 
2013-06-25 02:58:25 AM
No Taco Bell hate from me. While the food isn't the most delicious, it's fast and cheap. It puts those hunger pangs to rest so I can get back to work. I usually buy 2 bean burritos and ask for the fire sauce. I often keep a bag of shredded cheese back at my office, so I can throw a little extra in. Slug them down with a big glass of water and go about the rest of the afternoon. I'm a lot more discriminating when it comes to dinner, but I'm usually reading or talking on the phone while I eat lunch so I'm not thinking too much about food quality.
 
2013-06-25 03:04:05 AM
Whoa, everybody back the hell up.  Subby, are you implying that at Taco Bell before qualifies as "genuine meat"?
 
2013-06-25 03:04:50 AM

NateAsbestos: Whoa, everybody back the hell up.  Subby, are you implying that what I ate at Taco Bell before qualifies as "genuine meat"?


Let me just correct myself and set myself up for the "Know how I know you're gay..." jokes right now...
 
2013-06-25 03:10:46 AM

RatMaster999: Funny, I thought the protein came in the "special sauce"


www.shortarmguy.com
 
2013-06-25 03:12:47 AM
philadelphia.foobooz.com

Am I really the Weeners this? Cmon fark, raise your game.
 
2013-06-25 03:13:25 AM

Lenny_da_Hog: Data from Infegy-a company that analyzes user-generated content on blogs, social-media accounts, and other online sources-shows that 43 percent of conversations about "meat" over the last six months were negative and often included such words as "bad," "concerns," and "problem."

On the other hand, only 6 percent of conversations about "protein" were negative. Most people associated it with words like "good", "healthy," and "delicious." The result: Some 91 percent of conversations about the "Power Protein" menu have been positive, according to Infegy.

Marketers are pieces of shiat.

There. Datamine that.


...Ooh, you know what Lenny da Hog's doing now, he's going for the righteous indignation dollar. That's a big dollar. A lot of people are feeling that indignation. We've done research - huge market. He's doing a good thing.
 
2013-06-25 03:19:15 AM

God-is-a-Taco: 43 percent of conversations about "meat" over the last six months were negative and often included such words as "bad," "concerns," and "problem."
On the other hand, only 6 percent of conversations about "protein" were negative. Most people associated it with words like "good", "healthy," and "delicious." The result: Some 91 percent of conversations about the "Power Protein" menu have been positive..."

And so the cycle begins anew. Marketers have found a new word to destroy, and soon "protein" will be something smart consumers will have to be wary of.


The more optimistic view is "maybe people will figure out that meat is made of protein (and fat)".

/you're probably right, though
 
2013-06-25 03:28:26 AM
Or it could be something healthy like soy or whey protein, in which case they'd be smart to not advertise it's not animal protein.  Because 'Murica.
 
2013-06-25 03:36:37 AM
FTFA: Missy Schaaphok, nutritionist and product manager for Taco Bell...

notsureifserious.jpg
 
2013-06-25 03:37:59 AM

Bumblefark: ...Ooh, you know what Lenny da Hog's doing now, he's going for the righteous indignation dollar. That's a big dollar. A lot of people are feeling that indignation. We've done research - huge market. He's doing a good thing.


I do miss the man.
 
2013-06-25 04:06:36 AM

Rant_Casey's_Rabies_Buffet: Ryker's Peninsula: Health-conscious consumers... in Ohio?
Good luck with that.

I hate to see a perfectly innocent mass of land with invisible lines telling it where it ends and sanity begins pissed on like this.

/trying to escape to the Pitt in the next month or so.


No mass of land is perfectly innocent, invisible lines only get you invisibly high, the ending is just the beginning, there is no sanity, but you're totally right about the pee part.
 
2013-06-25 04:21:47 AM

Makh: My mom still cooks like this. Entrees are based on the nutrients they provide. You have the protein, starch, chlorophyll, and dishes also named after the primary vitamin or mineral they provided. Why yes, she also was a computer programmer who wrote in assembly and other languages.


"Chlorophyll" is a nutrient?
 
2013-06-25 04:26:59 AM
There's no such thing as synthetic meat, unless you're talking tofu or dildos
 
2013-06-25 04:31:25 AM
"The menu is part of Taco Bell's recent commitment to making a healthier menu by 2020."Shoot for the stars, guys./ The Apollo program took less time to get to the moon.
 
2013-06-25 05:04:06 AM
Nice troll headline,  subby, but in the article they say specifically they're just calling it protein because the marketers have recorded too many negative connotations connected to the word "meat."  There is nothing at all in the article to suggest that they aren't still using real animal parts.

Now, the  quality of those animal parts...that's another discussion.

/I will not lie, I like their tacos
 
2013-06-25 05:07:45 AM
If they're worried about associations, they really need to do something about:

Taco Bell
Diarrhea

Taco Bell
Hershey squirts

Taco Bell
Green apple splashies

Taco Bell
Brown ass-fountain

Taco Bell
shiats, trots, runs....
 
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