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(Scotus Blog)   The Supreme Court will make history today. Well..might make history. Well..at least there will be a thread to make Scalia jokes today. (Decisions at 10am Eastern)   (scotusblog.com) divider line 171
    More: Interesting, supreme courts, history  
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4086 clicks; posted to Politics » on 24 Jun 2013 at 8:25 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-24 08:26:59 AM  
SCOTUS will uphold DOMA and declare gays to be 3/5 people.
 
2013-06-24 08:27:14 AM  
Two Scalias walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

/Subby didn't say they had to be funny.
 
2013-06-24 08:30:17 AM  

Muta: SCOTUS will uphold DOMA and declare gays to be 3/5 people.


Please, 4/5 just because of the fabulousness
 
2013-06-24 08:33:26 AM  

picturescrazy: /Subby didn't say they had to be funny.


Take my Scalia. Please.
 
2013-06-24 08:33:52 AM  
Alito is making Scalia look reasonable these days.  That's where all the crazy is.
 
2013-06-24 08:34:14 AM  
... That was no lady, that was my Scalia!
 
2013-06-24 08:35:12 AM  
I had my Scalia removed when I was a kid, and got to eat ice cream for a week.
 
2013-06-24 08:35:28 AM  
Prop 8 won't have standing
DOMA is illegal
 
2013-06-24 08:38:21 AM  
When the Supreme Court rules it is legal to use lethal Defensive Force against the people and companies that pump poisons into our water, air, and food....that will be a historic day.
 
2013-06-24 08:40:54 AM  
I'm half-expecting it all to go state's rights, IF the conservative majority holds to ...well... being conservative.

DOMA will get shiatcanned, while Prop 8 will be upheld (or stricken down only in the weakest sense).

IANACL, so I can't really say where stuff will fall in the spectrum between "upheld" and "stricken."  Judges and lawyers are tricksy.  So my predictions are a rough estimate.

bleh.
 
2013-06-24 08:42:21 AM  
Any chance they might wimp out and push this back yet again?

I hope they do the right thing and then we will hear the teeth gnashing and lamentations of the conservatives. Civil rights should never be a "states' rights" issue.
 
2013-06-24 08:43:48 AM  

xanadian: I'm half-expecting it all to go state's rights, IF the conservative majority holds to ...well... being conservative.

DOMA will get shiatcanned, while Prop 8 will be upheld (or stricken down only in the weakest sense).

IANACL, so I can't really say where stuff will fall in the spectrum between "upheld" and "stricken."  Judges and lawyers are tricksy.  So my predictions are a rough estimate.

bleh.


They will strike down DOMA, they will not rule one way or the other on Prop 8 letting the lower court rulings stand.
 
2013-06-24 08:44:01 AM  
A lady goes to the vet.  He looks behind her but doesn't see a pet.  "It's about my husband, Anton Scalia... He refuses to eat anything but dog food."  She hands him an empty dog food can.  The doc reads the label.
"Hmm.  Meat, barley, meat by-products... It's not ideal, but it shouldn't hurt him."
A few months later, the vet encounters Mrs. Scalia in line at the grocery store.  He sees that she isn't buying any dog food.
"Is Justice Scalia feeling better now?"
"No, he's dead."
"Dead?  But surely it wasn't the dog food that killed him."
"No, he was licking his balls in the driveway, and I backed over him in the station wagon."
 
2013-06-24 08:44:44 AM  
I would make a killing cornering the popcorn market today
 
2013-06-24 08:45:37 AM  
...so I say "Do you love me?" and she says "No! But that's a really nice Scalia!"
 
2013-06-24 08:46:40 AM  

Tom_Slick: They will strike down DOMA, they will not rule one way or the other on Prop 8 letting the lower court rulings stand.


As hard as they were trying there is enough room for standing to require a court ruling

Unless the court gets all Alzheimer's on us and goes Bush v Gore saying "Really this time and only this time, its a fluke never again can this be used"
 
2013-06-24 08:47:13 AM  

loveblondieo: Any chance they might wimp out and push this back yet again?

I hope they do the right thing and then we will hear the teeth gnashing and lamentations of the conservatives. Civil rights should never be a "states' rights" issue.


Yeah, I'm more than a little annoyed that legislation that has been passed pretty much because of open bigotry is being protected because SCOTUS doesn't want to step on any toes.

/we'll almost certainly get a decision on both cases today but the conventional wisdom is that Prop 8 will be decided on States Rights or standing not based on the same sex marriage issue. I think pretty much everyone expects DOMA to be struck down.
 
2013-06-24 08:47:25 AM  

soupafi: Prop 8 won't have standing
DOMA is illegal


and IIRC the former means that California remains fabulous but the decision is not binding anywhere else, while the latter means that all states must recognize gay marriages entered into where such entrance is already legal, correct?
 
2013-06-24 08:47:54 AM  
According to the blog, at least one further decision day will occur next week. As such, I do not expect any rulings regarding Proposition 8 nor the Defense of Marriage Act today; the high court typically releases controversial, high-profile rulings last. Following the overturning of unreasonable bans on civilian handgun ownership in the District of Columbia and, later, Chicago, I have come to suspect that the members of the high court gain rare satisfaction from the resulting artificial creation of suspense.
 
2013-06-24 08:49:03 AM  

IdBeCrazyIf: Tom_Slick: They will strike down DOMA, they will not rule one way or the other on Prop 8 letting the lower court rulings stand.

As hard as they were trying there is enough room for standing to require a court ruling

Unless the court gets all Alzheimer's on us and goes Bush v Gore saying "Really this time and only this time, its a fluke never again can this be used"


I just think they will wimp out on Prop 8 and duck making a ruling at all.
 
2013-06-24 08:49:49 AM  
The conservatives will uphold DOMA using convoluted logic about how the judges shouldn't be the moral police and that elected representatives put that law in place, so they should remove it. States' rights and small government supporters of Scalia will give him a standing ovation causing heads to explode due to cognitive dissonance.
 
2013-06-24 08:50:41 AM  
I had to use some weird cream to get rid of my Scalia.

Ok, in all seriousness, is this going to be on CSPAN or anything? I'm lucky enough to be home today.
 
2013-06-24 08:52:24 AM  

Tom_Slick: IdBeCrazyIf: Tom_Slick: They will strike down DOMA, they will not rule one way or the other on Prop 8 letting the lower court rulings stand.

As hard as they were trying there is enough room for standing to require a court ruling

Unless the court gets all Alzheimer's on us and goes Bush v Gore saying "Really this time and only this time, its a fluke never again can this be used"

I just think they will wimp out on Prop 8 and duck making a ruling at all.


Nah, they'll go for lower court ruling standing and then we'll all be back here in 4 years when states that have banned gay marriage have people with standing sue under the equal protection because those states still must recognize other states marriages.

Basically the courts are desperately trying NOT to pull a Roe v Wade when in reality they just need to pull the trigger instead of slowly and painfully peeling this bandaid off.
 
2013-06-24 08:53:28 AM  

tudorgurl: Ok, in all seriousness, is this going to be on CSPAN or anything? I'm lucky enough to be home today.


I'm sure someone will correct me if I'm wrong, SCOTUS does not allow cameras in the court room, and I think the findings are written, so other than the live shot outside the building there won't be much to show.
 
2013-06-24 08:53:56 AM  

Dimensio: According to the blog, at least one further decision day will occur next week. As such, I do not expect any rulings regarding Proposition 8 nor the Defense of Marriage Act today; the high court typically releases controversial, high-profile rulings last. Following the overturning of unreasonable bans on civilian handgun ownership in the District of Columbia and, later, Chicago, I have come to suspect that the members of the high court gain rare satisfaction from the resulting artificial creation of suspense.


We still have four VERY high profile cases left for them to issue decisions on. At least a couple of them should come today.
 
2013-06-24 08:55:10 AM  

tudorgurl: Ok, in all seriousness, is this going to be on CSPAN or anything? I'm lucky enough to be home today.


You can watch the 24/7 news agencies scramble to read the written decisions that were run out of the court room by lackeys
 
2013-06-24 08:56:05 AM  

Tom_Slick: tudorgurl: Ok, in all seriousness, is this going to be on CSPAN or anything? I'm lucky enough to be home today.

I'm sure someone will correct me if I'm wrong, SCOTUS does not allow cameras in the court room, and I think the findings are written, so other than the live shot outside the building there won't be much to show.


yeah no cameras in the court room. scotusblog usually blogs live about it though.
 
2013-06-24 08:56:56 AM  

RminusQ: while the latter means that all states must recognize gay marriages entered into where such entrance is already legal, correct?


No -- that section of the DOMA currently isn't being litigated.

The only thing the supreme court is deciding re: DOMA is whether the federal government has to recognize a same-sex marriage made in those states that allow them.
 
2013-06-24 08:57:49 AM  
Antonin Scalia has no nose.

How does he smell?

Like crap.
 
2013-06-24 08:59:47 AM  

Tom_Slick: tudorgurl: Ok, in all seriousness, is this going to be on CSPAN or anything? I'm lucky enough to be home today.

I'm sure someone will correct me if I'm wrong, SCOTUS does not allow cameras in the court room, and I think the findings are written, so other than the live shot outside the building there won't be much to show.


Correct.  They just hand out paper copies and the journalists all read it and report on it in real time.
 
2013-06-24 08:59:52 AM  

bulldg4life: tudorgurl: Ok, in all seriousness, is this going to be on CSPAN or anything? I'm lucky enough to be home today.

You can watch the 24/7 news agencies scramble to read the written decisions that were run out of the court room by lackeys


And then you can laugh when CNN gets it wrong.

Voiceofreason01: We still have four VERY high profile cases left for them to issue decisions on. At least a couple of them should come today.


If we don't get Perry or Windsor, I'd definitely expect to get Fisher v. Austin come down today.
 
2013-06-24 09:00:23 AM  
Scalia walks into a bar association with a big ship's wheel fastened to his pelvic region. Roberts (the bar tender) asks him "what's with the wheel?".  Scalia responds "I don't know, but it's drivin' me nuts!"
 
2013-06-24 09:01:15 AM  
So the guy says, "Hey, what are you doing to that Scalia?".   So I said, "I'm just helping him up."
 
2013-06-24 09:01:23 AM  
I would be a very happy woman if Scalia and Thomas would extricate themselves from the court. Neither bring any good to the office and actually hinder progress.
 
2013-06-24 09:02:53 AM  
richardbrenneman.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-06-24 09:04:25 AM  
Always amazes me How liberals ask the USSC to defer to Congress in all aspects... except for DOMA. That was your primary reasoning for ACA. At least try to be slightly consistent.
 
2013-06-24 09:06:40 AM  

MyRandomName: Always amazes me How liberals ask the USSC to defer to Congress in all aspects... except for DOMA. That was your primary reasoning for ACA. At least try to be slightly consistent.


lolwut
 
2013-06-24 09:06:50 AM  
Scalia strongly disfavors the Court's ruling in Miranda v. Arizona, which held that a confession by an arrested suspect who had not been advised of his rights was inadmissible in court, and voted to overrule Miranda in the 2000 case of Dickerson v. United States, but was in a minority of two with Justice Clarence Thomas. Calling the Miranda decision a "milestone of judicial overreaching"

Fark them.
 
2013-06-24 09:09:21 AM  
DOMA will be upheld
Prop8 will be tossed

Thats what I am putting my money on
 
2013-06-24 09:11:48 AM  
Scalia and a duck walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "Where'd you get the pig."

Scalia says, "That's not a pig, that's a duck."

He says, "I was talking to the duck."
 
2013-06-24 09:12:05 AM  
Here is to hoping we can finally be done with this affirmative action crap...
 
2013-06-24 09:15:20 AM  
Scalia walks into a bar with a toad on his head. 'What the hell is that?' asks the bartender. The toad replies, 'I don't know - it started as a wart on my ass and grew.'
 
2013-06-24 09:17:01 AM  

Muta: SCOTUS will uphold DOMA and declare gays to be 3/5 people.


They already treat unmarried people (including the gheys) as 1/2 a person, so I guess that extra 1/10 would be a victory for the gays.  Rest of us still second class citizens though.
 
2013-06-24 09:18:18 AM  
Another case I am looking forward to hearing the results on. This, I fear, will not go in the right direction.
 
2013-06-24 09:20:11 AM  
Scalia, Thomas and Alito walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"
 
2013-06-24 09:20:46 AM  

MyRandomName: Always amazes me How liberals ask the USSC to defer to Congress in all aspects... except for DOMA. That was your primary reasoning for ACA. At least try to be slightly consistent.


Your criticism is interesting, but I believe that your established history of dishonesty diminishes your credibility.
 
2013-06-24 09:30:58 AM  

loveblondieo: Another case I am looking forward to hearing the results on. This, I fear, will not go in the right direction.


I haven't heard of that one.  From reading the article, it sounds pretty shiatty for everyone involved.
 
2013-06-24 09:33:17 AM  

MyRandomName: Always amazes me How liberals ask the USSC to defer to Congress in all aspects... except for DOMA. That was your primary reasoning for ACA. At least try to be slightly consistent.


What color is the sky  in your world?
 
2013-06-24 09:33:35 AM  
Scalia calls home to his wife, and says, "I'm gonna be out with John all night, don't wait up." Scalia's wife hangs up the phone, turns to the guy next to her in bed and says, "It's all right, John, he says he's with you."
 
2013-06-24 09:37:35 AM  

PanicMan: loveblondieo: Another case I am looking forward to hearing the results on. This, I fear, will not go in the right direction.

I haven't heard of that one.  From reading the article, it sounds pretty shiatty for everyone involved.


I am really rooting for the adopted parents. The biological "father" didn't want anything to do with Veronica initially.
 
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