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(New Musical Express)   Twenty-five celebrity baby names worse than North West   (nme.com ) divider line
    More: Silly, celebrity  
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4055 clicks; posted to FarkUs » on 24 Jun 2013 at 9:45 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-24 09:02:15 AM  
 
2013-06-24 09:13:15 AM  
Why can't celebrities name their kids normal American names like Khaylee or Kaedynn or D'Brickashaw?
 
2013-06-24 09:18:59 AM  
It was a lot more sane back in 1999

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-24 09:23:24 AM  
No Moxy Crimefighter or Pilot Inspektor?
 
2013-06-24 09:39:19 AM  
Those two give birth to the Antichrist and you give a slide show with popup ads?  Talk about adding insult to sulphury.
 
2013-06-24 09:48:30 AM  
Link gave me nothing but a plain white screen.  I assume the Zappa kids are on it?
 
2013-06-24 09:50:36 AM  

Pants full of macaroni!!: Link gave me nothing but a plain white screen.  I assume the Zappa kids are on it?


You leave Moon Unit and Dweezil alone!

Damn it, now I wanna go listen to Joe's Garage.
 
2013-06-24 09:51:02 AM  

ManateeGag: No Moxy Crimefighter or Pilot Inspektor?


Musicians only.

/Ok, "musician" is a stretch for some of them, but you get the point.
 
2013-06-24 09:54:04 AM  
What's wrong with Otis? At least it's a real name.
 
2013-06-24 09:54:39 AM  
What is it with celebrities that makes them think, "Hmm, it would totally be a great idea to saddle my child with a name that will certainly lead to them getting teased and made fun of all during elementary and middle school?"
 
2013-06-24 09:56:18 AM  
Nicolas Cage named his kid Kal-El
 
2013-06-24 09:57:46 AM  

PizzaJedi81: Pants full of macaroni!!: Link gave me nothing but a plain white screen.  I assume the Zappa kids are on it?

You leave Moon Unit and Dweezil alone!

Damn it, now I wanna go listen to Joe's Garage.


Hey now, I respect the Zappa kids.  Out of all of the "celebrity kids with weird names", they seem to have grown up the most "normal" and well-adjusted.

/saw Dweezil in concert awhile back - he did his old man proud
 
2013-06-24 09:59:55 AM  

Pants full of macaroni!!: saw Dweezil in concert awhile back - he did his old man proud


He do any of his dad's stuff?
 
2013-06-24 10:00:05 AM  
Is naming a kid Dylan really worse than naming your kid North? I didn't think Otis was really that unusual of a name either.
 
2013-06-24 10:02:42 AM  

PizzaJedi81: Pants full of macaroni!!: saw Dweezil in concert awhile back - he did his old man proud

He do any of his dad's stuff?


It was ALL his dad's stuff.  3 hours of it.  He's been doing the Zappa Plays Zappa thing for several years now.
 
2013-06-24 10:04:24 AM  

Pants full of macaroni!!: PizzaJedi81: Pants full of macaroni!!: saw Dweezil in concert awhile back - he did his old man proud

He do any of his dad's stuff?

It was ALL his dad's stuff.  3 hours of it.  He's been doing the Zappa Plays Zappa thing for several years now.


Man, I could go for I'm the Slime now, too.
 
2013-06-24 10:09:45 AM  
So does that make her vagina the North West passage now?
 
2013-06-24 10:14:34 AM  
Wait, back up. They named their kid "North West"? Because Kanye's last name is West, I get it. That's like something two stoners would come up with at 2:00 AM. Except when the stoners sobered up in the morning they would be like, "That's farking stupid, nevermind".

As for Nick Cage naming his kid Kal el, at least the kid can just go by "Cal". And "Cage" isn't his last name anyway, since father, Mr. Coppola didn't want to give the illusion that there was such a thing as nepotism in Hollywood.

Name your pets goofy shiat to express yourselves. Don't drag your kids into your narcissistic bullshiat. Of course, look at who we're talking about.
 
2013-06-24 10:14:47 AM  

PizzaJedi81: What's wrong with Otis? At least it's a real name.


thunderchunk jones: Is naming a kid Dylan really worse than naming your kid North? I didn't think Otis was really that unusual of a name either.


img.fark.net

It has it's ups and downs.

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-24 10:16:11 AM  
And apparently because the Jonas brothers exist, using that as a first name is somehow stupid now.  Now, if one of the Jonas brothers names their kid Jonas...........
 
2013-06-24 10:17:31 AM  

debug: So does that make her vagina the North West passage now?


I think it's the Trail of Tears.
 
2013-06-24 10:18:33 AM  

FuryOfFirestorm: What is it with celebrities that makes them think, "Hmm, it would totally be a great idea to saddle my child with a name that will certainly lead to them getting teased and made fun of all during elementary and middle school?"


Considering that all of these kids are likely to be raised in hermetically sealed private schools loaded with
other kids with boutique names, alas this argument does not hold water any longer.

Instead, the kids with 'normal' names are likely to get teased:

"HA HA HA!  YOUR PARENTS NAMED YOU JOHN!  THEY HAVE NO IMAGINATION!"
 
2013-06-24 10:22:08 AM  

DjangoStonereaver: FuryOfFirestorm: What is it with celebrities that makes them think, "Hmm, it would totally be a great idea to saddle my child with a name that will certainly lead to them getting teased and made fun of all during elementary and middle school?"

Considering that all of these kids are likely to be raised in hermetically sealed private schools loaded with
other kids with boutique names, alas this argument does not hold water any longer.

Instead, the kids with 'normal' names are likely to get teased:

"HA HA HA!  YOUR PARENTS NAMED YOU JOHN!  THEY HAVE NO IMAGINATION!"


Good point. In a land of Audio Sciences and Moxie Crimefighters, a Jennifer or a Courtney would be the outsider.
 
2013-06-24 10:23:12 AM  

thunderchunk jones: Is naming a kid Dylan really worse than naming your kid North? I didn't think Otis was really that unusual of a name either.


That's what I was thinking.  They really stretched the meaning of the word "strange".

/thought 'Lennon' was okay too
 
2013-06-24 10:25:29 AM  
I had to click away. I could feel my brain gettin' plum stoopid-like.
 
2013-06-24 10:36:10 AM  

FuryOfFirestorm: What is it with celebrities that makes them think, "Hmm, it would totally be a great idea to saddle my child with a name that will certainly lead to them getting teased and made fun of all during elementary and middle school?"


They all end up going to the same private schools in NYC or LA, so all their classmates have odd names, too.
 
2013-06-24 10:57:58 AM  
So, when the kid gets older, is she gonna have her name changed to Delta?

/got nothing
 
2013-06-24 11:01:39 AM  

debug: So does that make her vagina the North West passage now?


*slow clap*
 
2013-06-24 11:01:51 AM  

debug: So does that make her vagina the North West passage now?


Good luck finding Franklin in there.
 
2013-06-24 11:02:16 AM  

grokca: debug: So does that make her vagina the North West passage now?

Good luck finding Franklin in there.


Hold on, let me grab my keys and we can drive out.
 
2013-06-24 11:08:59 AM  

PizzaJedi81: grokca: debug: So does that make her vagina the North West passage now?

Good luck finding Franklin in there.

Hold on, let me grab my keys and we can drive out.


I just need to trace one warm line through a land so wild and savage.
 
2013-06-24 11:09:12 AM  

debug: So does that make her vagina the North West passage now?


They should have given the kid the middle name - 'Bynorth'
 
2013-06-24 11:11:23 AM  
Some friends named their son Titus Rocket (last name). I like it.
 
2013-06-24 11:18:26 AM  

Thank You Black Jesus!: Some friends named their son Titus Rocket (last name). I like it.


Ran into an old classmate years ago, and while comparing our kids' names decided his naming his son "Rocket" (first name) won out.

/My kids have stupid names, but they love them and won't change them now (I've begged). Go figure.

debug: So does that make her vagina the North West passage now?


You just won all the internets.
 
2013-06-24 11:18:27 AM  

DanZero: It was a lot more sane back in 1999

[img.fark.net image 850x714]


ha..there was a woman here in a news article who was named "Aquanetta".
 
2013-06-24 11:28:40 AM  
img.fark.net
Jayden Aiden Colin Jackson Logan Mason etc.
 
2013-06-24 11:35:14 AM  

mama2tnt: Thank You Black Jesus!: Some friends named their son Titus Rocket (last name). I like it.

Ran into an old classmate years ago, and while comparing our kids' names decided his naming his son "Rocket" (first name) won out.

/My kids have stupid names, but they love them and won't change them now (I've begged). Go figure.

debug: So does that make her vagina the North West passage now?

You just won all the internets.


Director Robert Rodriguez named his sons Racer, Rebel, Rouge, and Rocket.
 
2013-06-24 11:39:30 AM  
Taylor Hanson named one of his kids Vigo. I think his other kids are named Ezra, Penelope, and River.
I guess you just have to be different! Penelope is cute though.
 
2013-06-24 11:40:39 AM  

Pucca: Vigo


Not exactly a man of the people. Also known as Vigo the Cruel, Vigo the Torturer, Vigo the Despised, and Vigo the Unholy.
 
2013-06-24 11:45:14 AM  
Somehow this weekend I ended up on Jack Black's wikipedia page and saw that his sons are named were named Sam and Thomas. What's sad is that I was shocked that his kids' names were "normal".
 
2013-06-24 11:49:15 AM  
Meh. Half of 'em are no more or less stupid than any other name. "Michael" is no better than "Omri", it's merely an appeal to tradition.

Now, when you play silly games like "Tu Morrow" or "North West", rhyme your kid like "Zowie Bowie" AND "Rolan Bolan" ... yeah, that's different.

Heck, even when you pair-rhyme twins, like "Jayden" and "Brayden", you deserve a slap.
 
2013-06-24 12:02:39 PM  
i just think it's funny that anna wintour (however it's spelled) trolled this family for the entire life of their child. apparently it was her idea, and the wests are too stupid to realize when they're being trolled.
 
2013-06-24 12:09:24 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: Meh. Half of 'em are no more or less stupid than any other name. "Michael" is no better than "Omri", it's merely an appeal to tradition.

Now, when you play silly games like "Tu Morrow" or "North West", rhyme your kid like "Zowie Bowie" AND "Rolan Bolan" ... yeah, that's different.

Heck, even when you pair-rhyme twins, like "Jayden" and "Brayden", you deserve a slap.


I knew a set of twins that were named Mystie and Misty. Was close friends with Misty and later found out she had a twin of the same name. Never met Mystie but I think she went by her middle name.
 
2013-06-24 12:14:09 PM  

mjohnson71: Somehow this weekend I ended up on Jack Black's wikipedia page and saw that his sons are named were named Sam and Thomas. What's sad is that I was shocked that his kids' names were "normal".


He's a comedian. With Tenacious D and his various characters, his schtick is to be an obnoxious attention whore. There's no reason to think that he's like that in real life. These other people on the other hand have no such layers about them.
 
2013-06-24 12:31:25 PM  
You should choose your baby's name based on which one will give you the most publicity.
 
2013-06-24 12:52:56 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: Meh. Half of 'em are no more or less stupid than any other name. "Michael" is no better than "Omri", it's merely an appeal to tradition.

Now, when you play silly games like "Tu Morrow" or "North West", rhyme your kid like "Zowie Bowie" AND "Rolan Bolan" ... yeah, that's different.

Heck, even when you pair-rhyme twins, like "Jayden" and "Brayden", you deserve a slap.


What about a pair of twins I went to school with: Alex & Alexis
 
2013-06-24 01:05:17 PM  

KJUW89: thunderchunk jones: Is naming a kid Dylan really worse than naming your kid North? I didn't think Otis was really that unusual of a name either.

That's what I was thinking.  They really stretched the meaning of the word "strange".

/thought 'Lennon' was okay too


Yeah I didn't think Lennon was strange either.

Also, i dont think Jonas is all that odd. I would probably think of the Weezer song My Name is Jonas. I can say I would never have thought of the Jonas brother's.
 
2013-06-24 02:49:08 PM  

JameZZ82: ArcadianRefugee: Meh. Half of 'em are no more or less stupid than any other name. "Michael" is no better than "Omri", it's merely an appeal to tradition.

Now, when you play silly games like "Tu Morrow" or "North West", rhyme your kid like "Zowie Bowie" AND "Rolan Bolan" ... yeah, that's different.

Heck, even when you pair-rhyme twins, like "Jayden" and "Brayden", you deserve a slap.

What about a pair of twins I went to school with: Alex & Alexis


When I went to HS, we had a pair of twins: Tracey and Stacey. Odder, they were guys.

They were the nicest couple of guys you could meet, as well as built like brick shiathouses. Needless to say, no one teased them over their names.
 
2013-06-24 03:10:41 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: Meh. Half of 'em are no more or less stupid than any other name. "Michael" is no better than "Omri", it's merely an appeal to tradition.

Now, when you play silly games like "Tu Morrow" or "North West", rhyme your kid like "Zowie Bowie" AND "Rolan Bolan" ... yeah, that's different.

Heck, even when you pair-rhyme twins, like "Jayden" and "Brayden", you deserve a slap.


My brother and I have rhyming names.  My parents swear they didn't do it on purpose.  I know better.

/both rhyme with "gamy"
 
2013-06-24 03:34:13 PM  
Oh! Another "don't do that when naming your child":

If your last name is a first name, do not give your child that first name.

In other words, avoid "Michael Michaels", "Peter Peters", "Robert Roberts", etc. Probably also best to steer clear of "Robert Robertson" and such as well.

Personal gripe: avoid "Junior" (or the 2nd, IV, whatever). Seriously. If you just have to express your narcissism with your child naming, do it with the kid's middle name. He's already carrying your family name; let his given name be his own.
 
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