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(Chicago Trib)   Nik Wallenda confident ahead of high wire act. Grand Canyon and Darwin looking pretty confident too   ( chicagotribune.com) divider line
    More: Asinine, Karl Wallenda, Grand Canyon, Navajo Nation, wind gust, tropical storm andrea  
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4097 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jun 2013 at 6:44 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



543 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-06-23 06:46:17 PM  
After this, if he wants to walk across the second biggest hole in the world, he should contact my ex-wife.
 
2013-06-23 06:47:01 PM  
I'm not sure he truly understands the gravity of the situation.
 
2013-06-23 06:49:08 PM  
I wish him the best of luck

/too obscure?
 
2013-06-23 06:50:02 PM  
10 second delay.  I guess we'll know if the screen goes blank.

(Actually, I'll know because a fark newsflash will show up.)
 
2013-06-23 06:51:58 PM  
I love The Falling Wallendas.
 
2013-06-23 06:52:30 PM  
Why?
 
2013-06-23 06:53:40 PM  

js34603: Why?


To get to the other side.
 
2013-06-23 06:55:46 PM  
Darwin shouldn't be feeling very confident since the article says that he's a 7th generation member of his family troupe.
 
2013-06-23 06:56:04 PM  
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-06-23 06:56:05 PM  
"That's really where I get my peace," he said. "I have confidence that if something were to happen to me, I know where I'm going."

No you don't. You have a theory on the matter, but nobody really knows for sure due to that 1-way ticket problem.

That said...good luck.
 
2013-06-23 06:57:15 PM  
Suicide by tightrope
 
2013-06-23 06:58:40 PM  
This guy is a complete idiot.

Summer is the worst time to do anything in the air in the high desert. Thermals off that canyon are going to pick him up and deposit his body somewhere Laughlin.

Of course, now Winter would be a bad time too considering snow and rain...
 
2013-06-23 06:58:46 PM  
Is this going to be another "Oh thank you Jesus, thank you dear Jesus" deal like last time? Or do they not have him mic'd.
 
2013-06-23 06:59:21 PM  
is this going to be like the other time, when he had a harness on and a safety net like 5 feet below him the whole way?
 
2013-06-23 06:59:41 PM  

man metaphysical: Suicide by tightrope


But he has a safety team ready to pluck him off the rope within 60 seconds if things go wrong!!

/60 seconds is a LONG farking time to hold on to a 2 inch steel cable in 40 mile an hour winds...assuming you can even catch the rope when you slip.
//and this farker lets his kids watch.
 
2013-06-23 06:59:52 PM  
with a 10 second time delay
 
2013-06-23 07:00:06 PM  

Fuggin Bizzy: "That's really where I get my peace," he said. "I have confidence that if something were to happen to me, I know where I'm going."

No you don't. You have a theory on the matter, but nobody really knows for sure due to that 1-way ticket problem.

That said...good luck.


No, he has a hypothesis on the matter.
 
2013-06-23 07:03:22 PM  

Ricardo Klement: No, he has a hypothesis on the matter.


"Theory" rolls off the tongue better, and I'm posting on FARK, not writing a dissertation.
 
2013-06-23 07:04:43 PM  
I don't want to see the guy get killed, but from what I have seen on TV and read on the internet, he is such a smug attention whore. He claims to be a christian who just wants others to think of him as a "regular guy", yet his entire life has been about trying to set records and get everyone to pay attention to him. I hope he gets part way across, slips, and then has to hang onto the wire for dear life while they use a helicopter or something to save him. Maybe then a bit of humility will set in, and he will go spend time with his family instead of risking his life and his family's future on trying to get that next record or that next TV show or that next book deal.
 
2013-06-23 07:05:30 PM  
Meh, It isnt even at the Grand Canyon

Link

/going to watch. Dammit Discovery!
 
2013-06-23 07:05:31 PM  
who here wants to see him fall? 100%? okay thank you
 
2013-06-23 07:08:39 PM  
I hope he can get health care.
 
2013-06-23 07:09:08 PM  
I'm hoping he pulls a Evil Kneivel and falls and pulls the chute.  For the Lulz.
 
2013-06-23 07:11:07 PM  
Won't he just hang in midair until he realises there is nothing below him, and then fall and make a dent in the ground and just crawl out of it looking confused?

Will there be an annoying bird involved?
 
2013-06-23 07:11:17 PM  

TheShavingofOccam123: This guy is a complete idiot.

Summer is the worst time to do anything in the air in the high desert. Thermals off that canyon are going to pick him up and deposit his body somewhere Laughlin.

Of course, now Winter would be a bad time too considering snow and rain...


I've been to Laughlin.  Nice whores in that town.
 
2013-06-23 07:14:28 PM  

TheGreatGazoo: Won't he just hang in midair until he realises there is nothing below him, and then fall and make a dent in the ground and just crawl out of it looking confused?

Will there be an annoying bird involved?


Don't be silly. He can't possibly hold a sign and the balancing pole.
 
2013-06-23 07:15:01 PM  
blogs.ajc.com
 
2013-06-23 07:19:25 PM  
When is this circus, and where TV?
 
2013-06-23 07:20:02 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: Darwin shouldn't be feeling very confident since the article says that he's a 7th generation member of his family troupe.


Does he still send out "Father's Day" cards?   If not- Darwin can keep on grinning.
 
2013-06-23 07:20:37 PM  
Man, this guy definetly makes the Red Bull balloon jumper look like a fool, eh?
 
2013-06-23 07:21:55 PM  

TheShavingofOccam123: This guy is a complete idiot.

Summer is the worst time to do anything in the air in the high desert. Thermals off that canyon are going to pick him up and deposit his body somewhere Laughlin.

Of course, now Winter would be a bad time too considering snow and rain...


Fall is probably a bad option as well.
 
2013-06-23 07:24:48 PM  
 
2013-06-23 07:26:27 PM  
Would it be wrong to walk at the bottom of the canyon underneath him with a dustpan and brush?
 
2013-06-23 07:26:39 PM  

Ricardo Klement: Fuggin Bizzy: "That's really where I get my peace," he said. "I have confidence that if something were to happen to me, I know where I'm going."

No you don't. You have a theory on the matter, but nobody really knows for sure due to that 1-way ticket problem.

That said...good luck.

No, he has a hypothesis on the matter.


Isn't a hypothesis usually based on observation?

I'd say he has a belief on the matter - a belief that can never be proven or disproven conclusively, and has no relation to the Scientific Method whatsoever.

rhiannon: Is this going to be another "Oh thank you Jesus, thank you dear Jesus" deal like last time? Or do they not have him mic'd.


Well, that's reason enough for me not to pay attention to it.  That and, as mentioned above, his "Grand Canyon Walk" is not at the goddamn Grand Canyon.  (A Christian misrepresented something for dramatic effect and higher revenues?  Unpossible!)  To wit:

Permitting Wallenda's walk was not a casual decision, says Geri Hongeva, spokesperson for Navajo Parks & Recreation. "Discovery Channel, NBC Peacock Productions and Nik Wallenda all had to complete a number of clearances and gain proper permits," including archaeological, biological and environmental surveys, and handle tribal park land use fees and filming approvals.

Translation:  "Pay up, suckers."
 
2013-06-23 07:27:37 PM  

guytoronto: TheShavingofOccam123: This guy is a complete idiot.

Summer is the worst time to do anything in the air in the high desert. Thermals off that canyon are going to pick him up and deposit his body somewhere Laughlin.

Of course, now Winter would be a bad time too considering snow and rain...

Fall is probably a bad option as well.


+1
 
2013-06-23 07:30:37 PM  
 
2013-06-23 07:30:53 PM  
I don't know about y'all, but I'm rooting for gravity.

Just remember...It's not the fall that hurts. It's the sudden stop at the end.
 
2013-06-23 07:31:02 PM  
How much does this attention whore brave daredevil stand to make from this stunt?

Oh, and what's the maximum range for a RC helicopter? (Completely unrelated)
 
2013-06-23 07:32:32 PM  
He better check for the ACME on the cable and pole.
 
2013-06-23 07:33:08 PM  
They had a special yesterday as a lead-in to the event tonight.  Should be interesting.
 
2013-06-23 07:33:25 PM  

Zebulon: I don't want to see the guy get killed, but from what I have seen on TV and read on the internet, he is such a smug attention whore. He claims to be a christian who just wants others to think of him as a "regular guy", yet his entire life has been about trying to set records and get everyone to pay attention to him. I hope he gets part way across, slips, and then has to hang onto the wire for dear life while they use a helicopter or something to save him. Maybe then a bit of humility will set in, and he will go spend time with his family instead of risking his life and his family's future on trying to get that next record or that next TV show or that next book deal.


With all due respect, I met Nik when he was just 7 years old. As cliche as it may sound, walking a tight rope was in his DNA before he was even born. I traveled briefly with - and performed my magic act in - the same show as his Mother and Father (Delilah Wallenda and Terry Troffer). They are 2 of the nicest, most humble and unassuming people you'd ever want to meet.

The Wallendas don't do what they do for attention. They do it because that's simply what they do. They believe it's their duty to carry on Karl's legacy. They are ALL born into it and that's all they know. From the time they can walk, their life is a tight rope. Like a magician looking for the largest object to vanish; a singer for a song with the most difficult notes to hit; and a race car driver for a faster car...it's all a case of trying to reach for the next unattainable goal - and  be the best at what they do.

What I observed was a family striving for excellence in their chosen profession - although - they didn't choose their profession as much as inherit it.

And even if it were nothing but attention whoring - I'd say crossing Niagara Falls and the Grand Canyon probably deserve a bit of attention?

I wish Nik nothing but the best of luck. He's been training for this walk since he took his first "steps."
 
2013-06-23 07:36:28 PM  

Lt. Cheese Weasel: TheShavingofOccam123: This guy is a complete idiot.

Summer is the worst time to do anything in the air in the high desert. Thermals off that canyon are going to pick him up and deposit his body somewhere Laughlin.

Of course, now Winter would be a bad time too considering snow and rain...

I've been to Laughlin.  Nice whores in that town.


Da cobber have them send us whores, I marry all you betcha
 
2013-06-23 07:37:00 PM  
no manufactured drama here
 
2013-06-23 07:41:49 PM  

guytoronto: TheShavingofOccam123: This guy is a complete idiot.

Summer is the worst time to do anything in the air in the high desert. Thermals off that canyon are going to pick him up and deposit his body somewhere Laughlin.

Of course, now Winter would be a bad time too considering snow and rain...

Fall is probably a bad option as well.


Hopefully he'll have a Spring to break his Fall...

/sorry
 
2013-06-23 07:42:02 PM  
They keep going on about it being 1500 feet up. After about the first 90 feet, it's irrelevant. Just a little more scream time.
 
2013-06-23 07:42:19 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: Darwin shouldn't be feeling very confident since the article says that he's a 7th generation member of his family troupe.


I can recall seeing a news clip of one of the Wallendas attempting a tight rope walk between a couple of buildings, didn't make it. If one is weird enough to want to see someone die, going there and watching this live might be a pretty good way to do so. News articles are stressing the height of the walk but I think the distance is the biggest factor. 100 feet is more than high enough to kill him, 1400 feet of distance is going to mean he is up there a long time exposed to the whims of the wind.
I personally think Discovery should be ashamed for supporting this.
 
2013-06-23 07:42:32 PM  
Anyone got a feed?
 
2013-06-23 07:43:55 PM  

jdcgonzalez: Anyone got a feed?


Nevermind. Found it.
 
2013-06-23 07:45:02 PM  

jdcgonzalez: Anyone got a feed?


You can grab one off drudgereport.com
 
2013-06-23 07:46:32 PM  

DreamSnipers: I can recall seeing a news clip of one of the Wallendas attempting a tight rope walk between a couple of buildings, didn't make it


That would be his great grandfather Karl, who fell halfway through a walk in Puerto Rico. He was 73 years old, and the cause of his fall has been attributed to faulty rigging....Nik recreated the walk a few years ago.  It was kind of eerie watching him setting up his cable, pointing to a notch in the wall where his great grandfather's cable had rubbed as it was being tensioned.

/I might have nothing better to do, and might be watching the pre-walk special on Discovery.
//Maybe.
 
2013-06-23 07:48:10 PM  

DreamSnipers: I personally think Discovery should be ashamed for supporting this.


Considering their lineup, they gave up on shame a while ago.
 
2013-06-23 07:48:42 PM  
I just...hmm, I just don't know how I feel about this.  On one hand...well, never mind that.  I think I've just decided that "hell, go for it" is the only appropriate response here.  Not that my feelings on the matter matter in any way or that...you know, I think I'm going to have to quit while I'm ahead on this.  Maybe there are some yummy leftovers in the fridge.
 
2013-06-23 07:51:03 PM  
I've worked with a couple of daredevils and while I respect their bravery, I think they're insane.  If something goes wrong with my act, I look foolish (well, more foolish than usual); if something goes wrong with their act, they're off to the ICU or the morgue...
 
2013-06-23 07:51:03 PM  
If he dies, tomorrow is Monday.  Humanity moves on. And Justin Beiber lives. Think about that.
 
2013-06-23 07:52:04 PM  

Lt. Cheese Weasel: If he dies, tomorrow is Monday.  Humanity moves on. And Justin Beiber lives. Think about that.


And honey boo boo's mother has a boyfriend.  Most of Fark does not.  Think about that.
 
2013-06-23 07:52:31 PM  
What would really suck is if he was halfway over the canyon and a woman sitting on an inverted biplane clipped him...
 
2013-06-23 07:53:49 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: Lt. Cheese Weasel: If he dies, tomorrow is Monday.  Humanity moves on. And Justin Beiber lives. Think about that.

And honey boo boo's mother has a boyfriend.  Most of Fark does not.  Think about that.


I don't have a boyfriend.  But that's OK because I'm not into those backdoor shenanigans...
 
2013-06-23 07:54:42 PM  
 
2013-06-23 07:56:00 PM  
If I were the director of this show, I'd shoot him with a time delayed equilibrium inhibitor to take effect halfway through the walk. But that's me.
 
2013-06-23 07:58:02 PM  
He practiced this walk about 5 miles from me here in Sarasota. Best of luck Nik! Make it happen!
 
2013-06-23 08:03:33 PM  
Incredible circus.  I remember Howard Cosell calling the Snake River jump.  And the greatest troll ever. I am mildly amused at PT Barnums wisdom.
 
2013-06-23 08:04:20 PM  
Jim Cantore is there.  That means disaster.
 
2013-06-23 08:04:58 PM  
christ on a stick, Jim Cantore's there.
 
2013-06-23 08:05:51 PM  
Wait, did they just say there's a paramedic stationed at the bottom of the Grand Canyon? That's mighty thoughtful of them.
 
2013-06-23 08:06:06 PM  

Lt. Cheese Weasel: Incredible circus.  I remember Howard Cosell calling the Snake River jump.  And the greatest troll ever. I am mildly amused at PT Barnums wisdom.


If people didn't want to watch silly, pointless stuff, I'd be out of a job...
 
2013-06-23 08:06:29 PM  
Whew!  Thank goodness they have a paramedic down at the bottom!
 
2013-06-23 08:07:09 PM  

thoughtpol: christ on a stick, Jim Cantore's there.


Oh dear sweet Jesus on a wire christ on a stick, Jim Cantore's there
 
2013-06-23 08:07:33 PM  

soupart: Whew!  Thank goodness they have a paramedic down at the bottom!


Well, someone has to be there to stick the fork in him.

/really hope he doesn't fall...mostly because his kids are watching.
 
2013-06-23 08:08:17 PM  
They just informed us there is a paramedic at the bottom of the canyon.  Ummm. Ok.
 
2013-06-23 08:09:20 PM  

puppetmaster745: Wait, did they just say there's a paramedic stationed at the bottom of the Grand Canyon? That's mighty thoughtful of them.


Can paramedics pronounce someone dead in AZ? ("Injuries inconsistent with life" or something like that?) 'cause they'd need someone to do that.
 
2013-06-23 08:10:33 PM  
Is this on broadcast tv or not?
 
2013-06-23 08:10:49 PM  
oh i see, it's a commercial for the Navajo nation.

/it does not take that long to say good luck.
 
2013-06-23 08:11:47 PM  

evaned: puppetmaster745: Wait, did they just say there's a paramedic stationed at the bottom of the Grand Canyon? That's mighty thoughtful of them.

Can paramedics pronounce someone dead in AZ? ("Injuries inconsistent with life" or something like that?) 'cause they'd need someone to do that.


I'm thinking the paramedic could just look over the rim and say, "Ummm, yeah, he's dead."
 
2013-06-23 08:11:56 PM  

FC Exile: Is this on broadcast tv or not?


No, it's a DIscovery production.
 
2013-06-23 08:12:18 PM  
Nik is haunted by the gruesome fall of Karl Wallenda.  Let's show it to you!
 
2013-06-23 08:13:38 PM  
So apparently there's a 10 second tape delay. So we will miss the Wile E. Coyote moment
 
2013-06-23 08:13:38 PM  

smunns: They just informed us there is a paramedic at the bottom of the canyon.  Ummm. Ok.


But if he falls, he falls on sacred indian burial ground, unleashing a tormenting hell of zombie indians.  This is important folks.  WE COULD ALL DIE!
 
2013-06-23 08:13:49 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: Nik is haunted by the gruesome fall of Karl Wallenda.  Let's show it to you!


Meh. They've shown it like 6 times in the last two hours.
 
2013-06-23 08:14:11 PM  
Let's start a drinking game - every time anyone mentions faith, Jebus, or anything religious, as if that's how he does it, drink.  When Nik mentions it, drink twice.  If he falls after declaring his trust in his god to keep him safe, drink the bottle.
 
2013-06-23 08:14:19 PM  

AliceBToklasLives: So apparently there's a 10 second tape delay. So we will miss the Wile E. Coyote moment


Somebody is bound to have a hidden camera ready for that moment.
 
2013-06-23 08:14:25 PM  

smunns: They just informed us there is a paramedic at the bottom of the canyon.  Ummm. Ok.


A janitor might be more appropriate.
 
2013-06-23 08:15:17 PM  
Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?
 
2013-06-23 08:15:18 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Let's start a drinking game - every time anyone mentions faith, Jebus, or anything religious, as if that's how he does it, drink.  When Nik mentions it, drink twice.  If he falls after declaring his trust in his god to keep him safe, drink the bottle.


Jesus, God said go forth and be happy drunks not use your faith to die.
 
2013-06-23 08:15:33 PM  
so when is he going to actually start?  how long can tdc drag out the introduction
 
2013-06-23 08:15:39 PM  
And no I don't want to see him go splat - but only cause I don't want to see anyone go splat.

/well except Trump
 
2013-06-23 08:17:30 PM  
Why isn't TDC streaming the actual show instead of this interactive no host crap?
 
2013-06-23 08:17:34 PM  

Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?


Well, thanks to teh Intarwebz, we can all sit on our fat asses at home and watch the whole thing, including the hours of build-up by attention-whore announcers.
 
2013-06-23 08:18:07 PM  

thisiszombocom: so when is he going to actually start?  how long can tdc drag out the introduction


10 more commercial breaks
 
2013-06-23 08:18:43 PM  

thisiszombocom: so when is he going to actually start?  how long can tdc drag out the introduction


It's the Evel Knievel Effect.  There'd be an hour-long show that had nothing to do with motorcycles, then Evel would drive around for a few minutes, and then the stunt itself would be over in seconds.  A tightrope act lasts a bit longer, but they still have to add padding...
 
2013-06-23 08:18:44 PM  

FC Exile: Why isn't TDC streaming the actual show instead of this interactive no host crap?


They were streaming a osted segment a few minutes ago.  Don't tell me you actually want to watch the attention whores...
 
2013-06-23 08:18:53 PM  
up next:

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-23 08:18:55 PM  

thisiszombocom: so when is he going to actually start?  how long can tdc drag out the introduction


Me??? I am losing interest.
 
2013-06-23 08:19:12 PM  

Psycat: What would really suck is if he was halfway over the canyon and a woman sitting on an inverted biplane clipped him...


Tee hee! I lol'd on that comment!
/reserved seat with my hand basket ready
 
2013-06-23 08:19:42 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: FC Exile: Why isn't TDC streaming the actual show instead of this interactive no host crap?

They were streaming a osted segment a few minutes ago.  Don't tell me you actually want to watch the attention whores...


I've got a girl next to me with a very short attention span.
 
2013-06-23 08:20:21 PM  
And how come The Weather Channel is not showing this.
 
2013-06-23 08:20:34 PM  

FC Exile: Benevolent Misanthrope: FC Exile: Why isn't TDC streaming the actual show instead of this interactive no host crap?

They were streaming a osted segment a few minutes ago.  Don't tell me you actually want to watch the attention whores...

I've got a girl next to me with a very short attention span.


Keep her busy then
 
2013-06-23 08:20:56 PM  

Psycat: thisiszombocom: so when is he going to actually start?  how long can tdc drag out the introduction

It's the Evel Knievel Effect.  There'd be an hour-long show that had nothing to do with motorcycles, then Evel would drive around for a few minutes, and then the stunt itself would be over in seconds.  A tightrope act lasts a bit longer, but they still have to add padding...


That started more with Robbie.
 
2013-06-23 08:21:12 PM  
Oh FFS - the Karl Wallenda fall AGAIN??
 
2013-06-23 08:21:47 PM  

thisiszombocom: jdcgonzalez: Anyone got a feed?

http://skywire.discovery.com/live.html


I just started watching that feed. Is that CAM 4 a camera he is going to be *wearing* while he tries this? O.O
 
2013-06-23 08:21:56 PM  

herdgirl72: Psycat: What would really suck is if he was halfway over the canyon and a woman sitting on an inverted biplane clipped him...

Tee hee! I lol'd on that comment!
/reserved seat with my hand basket ready


I'm getting my own private brimstone jacuzzi.  Seriously, I'll bet stunt people have a very morbid sense of humor...
 
2013-06-23 08:21:58 PM  

SpikeStrip: no manufactured drama here


What do you think the "twist" will be? Wallenda makes it, but the chopper crashes?
 
2013-06-23 08:22:07 PM  
never trust riggers
 
2013-06-23 08:22:27 PM  

Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?


Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.
 
2013-06-23 08:22:48 PM  
And remember, if he makes it... SO WHAT?
 
2013-06-23 08:23:19 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Oh FFS - the Karl Wallenda fall AGAIN??


It's not TDC it's Snuff TV
 
2013-06-23 08:23:23 PM  

skinink: After this, if he wants to walk across the second biggest hole in the world, he should contact my ex-wife.


Why? He's already been there.

/so have a lot of us
 
2013-06-23 08:23:51 PM  

SpikeStrip: never trust riggers


that's racis... oh nevermind
 
2013-06-23 08:24:07 PM  
On their way:

img2u.info
 
2013-06-23 08:24:13 PM  

IrishBlunder: Would it be wrong to walk at the bottom of the canyon underneath him with a dustpan and brush?


Yes it would...youd be better off with a wet vac
 
2013-06-23 08:24:19 PM  

AliceBToklasLives: Benevolent Misanthrope: Oh FFS - the Karl Wallenda fall AGAIN??

It's not TDC it's Snuff TV


OK - new drinking game rule - they show the goddamn Karl Wallenda fall, drink twice.
 
2013-06-23 08:24:28 PM  

Fuggin Bizzy: Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?

Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.


It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...
 
2013-06-23 08:24:54 PM  
MILF
 
2013-06-23 08:25:49 PM  

Psycat: It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...


You mean like that guy on AGT who spent 36 hours setting up a farking domino chain?
 
2013-06-23 08:25:51 PM  

Psycat: Fuggin Bizzy: Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?

Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.

It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...


Me, too.  I have never understood it.

Oo - "prayer and contemplation!"  DRINK!
 
2013-06-23 08:26:22 PM  

IrishBlunder: Would it be wrong to walk at the bottom of the canyon underneath him with a dustpan and brush?


I think a shop vac would be more useful.
 
2013-06-23 08:26:49 PM  
Wait, his mother is a Wallenda?  I'm very confused.
 
2013-06-23 08:27:23 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Let's start a drinking game - every time anyone mentions faith, Jebus, or anything religious, as if that's how he does it, drink.  When Nik mentions it, drink twice.  If he falls after declaring his trust in his god to keep him safe, drink the bottle.


If you watched the pre-show you would be drunk by now.

Not for nothing the walk with he and his mom was pretty cool.
 
2013-06-23 08:27:44 PM  
Dude you can totally deal with the gusts...pshhh.

Odds on them being regrettable words?
 
2013-06-23 08:27:50 PM  

SpikeStrip: never trust riggers


Never trust anything that's been rigger rigged
 
2013-06-23 08:28:01 PM  

donnielove: Wait, his mother is a Wallenda?  I'm very confused.


His Father was a mudder
 
2013-06-23 08:28:02 PM  

Psycat: Fuggin Bizzy: Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?

Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.

It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...


John Force wants to know what you mean by "a whole day"?
 
2013-06-23 08:29:06 PM  

NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: Psycat: It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...

You mean like that guy on AGT who spent 36 hours setting up a farking domino chain?


Yes, but that was part of his brilliantly-crafted master plan to have an awesome comeback on the Wild Card round where Piers Morgan compared him to Rocky Balboa, and thence on to the Semi-Finals.

/actually, stick bombs are radically different from *yawn* domino chains; they're quicker but a hell of a lot more explosive

//if it weren't for the Evel Knievel Effect, that guy on AGT wouldn't have a career
 
2013-06-23 08:29:26 PM  

donnielove: Wait, his mother is a Wallenda?  I'm very confused.


well, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much, and want  to express their love,...
 
2013-06-23 08:29:28 PM  

donnielove: Wait, his mother is a Wallenda?  I'm very confused.


Why is that confusing?  Oh - you mean that he decided to use the name Wallenda, because if he used his dad's name no one would pay half as much attention to him?
 
2013-06-23 08:30:52 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Psycat: Fuggin Bizzy: Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?

Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.

It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...

Me, too.  I have never understood it.

Oo - "prayer and contemplation!"  DRINK!


I think that what makes the Kentucky Derby work is that the two-minute race is bracketed by several hours of drinking Jack Daniels...
 
2013-06-23 08:31:08 PM  

thisiszombocom: donnielove: Wait, his mother is a Wallenda?  I'm very confused.

well, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much, and want  to express their love,...


I'd like to see the mechanics of that on a high wire.
 
2013-06-23 08:34:44 PM  

rhiannon: Psycat: Fuggin Bizzy: Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?

Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.

It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...

John Force wants to know what you mean by "a whole day"?


Who's John Force?  Is he a friend of Max Powers?
 
2013-06-23 08:35:07 PM  
I want her skirt to um..ya know...
 
2013-06-23 08:35:23 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: donnielove: Wait, his mother is a Wallenda?  I'm very confused.

Why is that confusing?  Oh - you mean that he decided to use the name Wallenda, because if he used his dad's name no one would pay half as much attention to him?


Yeah, that's what threw me.  That and since his dad is his head of safety, I just assumed he was a Wallenda.
 
2013-06-23 08:35:27 PM  

Psycat: It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...


Said every girl who went on a first date with me.

Was that out loud?
 
2013-06-23 08:35:29 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: donnielove: Wait, his mother is a Wallenda?  I'm very confused.

Why is that confusing?  Oh - you mean that he decided to use the name Wallenda, because if he used his dad's name no one would pay half as much attention to him?


Nobody wants a Flying Troffer


img.fark.net
 
2013-06-23 08:35:39 PM  

wxboy: thisiszombocom: donnielove: Wait, his mother is a Wallenda?  I'm very confused.

well, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much, and want  to express their love,...

I'd like to see the mechanics of that on a high wire.


I don't know about a high wire, but there's definitely a video of it with climbing gear.
 
2013-06-23 08:36:11 PM  

Psycat: NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: Psycat: It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...

You mean like that guy on AGT who spent 36 hours setting up a farking domino chain?

Yes, but that was part of his brilliantly-crafted master plan to have an awesome comeback on the Wild Card round where Piers Morgan compared him to Rocky Balboa, and thence on to the Semi-Finals.

/actually, stick bombs are radically different from *yawn* domino chains; they're quicker but a hell of a lot more explosive

//if it weren't for the Evel Knievel Effect, that guy on AGT wouldn't have a career


No no, not stick bombs. That was at least novel.  This season they seriously had a domino chain guy
 
2013-06-23 08:36:57 PM  
She sez 'See you on the otherside'
 
2013-06-23 08:37:16 PM  

Mugato: Psycat: It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...

Said every girl who went on a first date with me.

Was that out loud?


That's why you have to pad things out with a Buster Keaton comedy afterwards...
 
2013-06-23 08:37:59 PM  
The shark week commercial was funny
 
2013-06-23 08:39:06 PM  

NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: Psycat: NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: Psycat: It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...

You mean like that guy on AGT who spent 36 hours setting up a farking domino chain?

Yes, but that was part of his brilliantly-crafted master plan to have an awesome comeback on the Wild Card round where Piers Morgan compared him to Rocky Balboa, and thence on to the Semi-Finals.

/actually, stick bombs are radically different from *yawn* domino chains; they're quicker but a hell of a lot more explosive

//if it weren't for the Evel Knievel Effect, that guy on AGT wouldn't have a career

No no, not stick bombs. That was at least novel.  This season they seriously had a domino chain guy


Sprice did a great job with his Rube Goldberg Machine and rumor has it that the stick-bomb guy had mentored him.

/stick bombs really are awesome when they work
//they don't work worth shiat if they've been painted a week before
 
2013-06-23 08:39:47 PM  
Well, there are no meaningful sporting events going on right now, so I might as well watch this thing.
 
2013-06-23 08:40:56 PM  
Ok pls tell me Naked and Afraid is a fake show
 
2013-06-23 08:41:15 PM  
And now another commercial for the Navajo Nation and their unfunded tourism industry...
 
2013-06-23 08:41:33 PM  
This is scheduled to go until 10:30?
 
2013-06-23 08:42:37 PM  
He's just following in his grandfather's footsteps.

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-23 08:43:18 PM  
Last minute change in plans...

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-23 08:43:29 PM  
number of minutes into the show: 45
number of steps taken: 0
 
2013-06-23 08:43:40 PM  
I'm watching Everyone eat behind the scenes.
 
2013-06-23 08:43:55 PM  
So, when is he set to actually farking start?

Ad oh my god is Cantore wearing push-up briefs?
 
2013-06-23 08:44:16 PM  

donnielove: This is scheduled to go until 10:30?


I'm sure the first hour is all talking about how beautiful the Grand Canyon is and how insane this stunt is.
 
2013-06-23 08:46:17 PM  
So, anyone know the exact location this is going on at?
 
2013-06-23 08:46:29 PM  
I wonder when that huge unweathered section opposite the starting point calved.
 
2013-06-23 08:46:31 PM  

Psycat: rhiannon: Psycat: Fuggin Bizzy: Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?

Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.

It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...

John Force wants to know what you mean by "a whole day"?

Who's John Force?  Is he a friend of Max Powers?


Famous funny car driver.  Has hot daughters who also race.
 
2013-06-23 08:47:26 PM  

Ricardo Klement: donnielove: This is scheduled to go until 10:30?

I'm sure the first hour is all talking about how beautiful the Grand Canyon is and how insane this stunt is.


I assumed they had covered that in the 2 hour pre-show I ignored.
 
2013-06-23 08:48:31 PM  

donnielove: Ricardo Klement: donnielove: This is scheduled to go until 10:30?

I'm sure the first hour is all talking about how beautiful the Grand Canyon is and how insane this stunt is.

I assumed they had covered that in the 2 hour pre-show I ignored.


That's what I had hoped too.
 
2013-06-23 08:48:46 PM  
Now they're talking about how they anchored in the cable that the dude is going to walk across. Yeah, I'll flip back in about an hour to see if the actual stunt has started.
 
2013-06-23 08:48:51 PM  

donnielove: This is scheduled to go until 10:30?


Yeah, I thought this was going to be a one hour thing.  Will tune back in in an hour.
 
2013-06-23 08:49:18 PM  
Wind is whipping right now, I tell you whut.
Does it go still at dusk there or sumptin?
 
2013-06-23 08:49:47 PM  

wxboy: So, anyone know the exact location this is going on at?


The United States.
 
2013-06-23 08:50:13 PM  

AliceBToklasLives: Ok pls tell me Naked and Afraid is a fake show


They showed a chicks butt in the promo so...
 
2013-06-23 08:50:25 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: Psycat: rhiannon: Psycat: Fuggin Bizzy: Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?

Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.

It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...

John Force wants to know what you mean by "a whole day"?

Who's John Force?  Is he a friend of Max Powers?

Famous funny car driver.  Has hot daughters who also race.


A-hah, good name for a funny car driver.  Max Power (not Powers) was an alternative personality of one Homer J. Simpson, whose "Whoo, hoo!" is often used by pathetic geeks.
 
2013-06-23 08:50:46 PM  

rhiannon: donnielove: Ricardo Klement: donnielove: This is scheduled to go until 10:30?

I'm sure the first hour is all talking about how beautiful the Grand Canyon is and how insane this stunt is.

I assumed they had covered that in the 2 hour pre-show I ignored.

That's what I had hoped too.


Nope. It was all about all the insane stuff he's done before, with a half dozen tributes to his great grandfather thrown in.
 
2013-06-23 08:52:02 PM  
I am guessing they are just stalling until the winds die down. What would be really funny is if the winds stay high enough that he doesn't try the walk at all.
 
2013-06-23 08:52:23 PM  

donnielove: Ricardo Klement: donnielove: This is scheduled to go until 10:30?

I'm sure the first hour is all talking about how beautiful the Grand Canyon is and how insane this stunt is.

I assumed they had covered that in the 2 hour pre-show I ignored.


Oh no - that was the pre-walk pre-show.  Now we're in the pre-walk show.  Then there will be the walk lead-in show.  Then another delay of some sort, I'm sure.

It's 1/4 mile, right?  So, I'm guessing it should take him 15-20 minutes, once he starts walking.  I'm going to make my lunch for tomorrow.  I'll bet he doesn't start until about 7:30 MDT or so.
 
2013-06-23 08:53:40 PM  

NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: rhiannon: donnielove: Ricardo Klement: donnielove: This is scheduled to go until 10:30?

I'm sure the first hour is all talking about how beautiful the Grand Canyon is and how insane this stunt is.

I assumed they had covered that in the 2 hour pre-show I ignored.

That's what I had hoped too.

Nope. It was all about all the insane stuff he's done before, with a half dozen tributes to his great grandfather thrown in.


Sounds like what we already went through with the Falls broadcast.
 
2013-06-23 08:54:07 PM  
I am guessing they are just stalling until the winds die down. What would be really funny is if the winds stay high enough that he doesn't try the walk at all.

----

They will probably postpone it for a week. Possibly mid-week. I could see it being moved to the Mythbusters time zone this week, since there has been a tie-in, promotionally, with MB.
I am sure that Discovery executives and Nick have back-ups involve, sort of how if you have a yard sale or a 5k or whatever that you have a rain date set.
 
2013-06-23 08:54:38 PM  
Aaaaaand another commercial for the Navajo Nation.
 
2013-06-23 08:54:45 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: AliceBToklasLives: Ok pls tell me Naked and Afraid is a fake show

They showed a chicks butt in the promo so...


chick butt? all i've seen on basic cable is man ass, so that's improvement
 
2013-06-23 08:55:15 PM  

Zebulon: I am guessing they are just stalling until the winds die down. What would be really funny is if the winds stay high enough that he doesn't try the walk at all.




48 mph thermal. If he had been on the wire, he'd have splatted.
 
2013-06-23 08:56:04 PM  
Ok is this the feature where we hear how the Navajo are inspired by Nik and the Washington Redskins.

/nope - social media update
//I feel bad for social media "reporters"
///thought they would be Woodward and Bernstein - ended up repeating Bieber's tweets --- for farks sake will they start this thing
 
2013-06-23 08:56:09 PM  
Maybe they're delaying things just to make sure there aren't any badly-singed coyotes falling out of the sky...
 
2013-06-23 08:56:14 PM  

Psycat: Fuggin Bizzy: Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?

Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.

It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...


I'd say it is a sign of the times they started in.  There was much less to do.  Instead of spending their lives on the internet or watching tv, they went out and did things.
 
2013-06-23 08:56:25 PM  
JESUS FARK - Joel Osteen!  DRINK!  Twice!
 
2013-06-23 08:56:29 PM  
JOEL OSTEEN?  QUICK! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!

Having that level of confluence of attention whore in one place is worse than dividing by zero.
 
2013-06-23 08:56:50 PM  
Reading tweets, Joel Osteen on the scene...could this GET more exciting?
 
2013-06-23 08:56:50 PM  
Joel Osteen is in the house!!!
 
2013-06-23 08:56:56 PM  
Joel Osteen? Really?
 
2013-06-23 08:57:32 PM  

Zebulon: I am guessing they are just stalling until the winds die down. What would be really funny is if the winds stay high enough that he doesn't try the walk at all.


This must be your first time watching one of these live event daredevil shows. It's 95% talk and 5% action each and every time.
 
2013-06-23 08:57:44 PM  
Yea the Navajos are behind the scenes butchering sheep!
 
kth
2013-06-23 09:00:04 PM  

FC Exile: Yea the Navajos are behind the scenes butchering sheep!


I would be much more likely to watch the Miss America pageant if they had to butcher sheep, like such as.
 
2013-06-23 09:00:07 PM  
Wow Miss Navajo is a ..........well, umm, what do the sheep look like?
 
2013-06-23 09:00:12 PM  

try fect taa daa: Joel Osteen is in the house!!!


He's there to convert the Navajo.
 
2013-06-23 09:00:59 PM  
yaaawn...think i'll go take a space jump brb
 
2013-06-23 09:01:30 PM  
Looks like I will have to choose between this and Breaking Amish
 
2013-06-23 09:03:49 PM  

Popcorn Johnny: Zebulon: I am guessing they are just stalling until the winds die down. What would be really funny is if the winds stay high enough that he doesn't try the walk at all.

This must be your first time watching one of these live event daredevil shows. It's 95% talk and 5% action each and every time.


Ok, I figured it out now, I was getting my time zones confused. I thought the show was only scheduled to last another 20 minutes. He has an *hour* and 20 minutes before he is over his time slot. My bad.
 
2013-06-23 09:03:57 PM  
Whats with all these Mexicans they keep showing? Are they trying to sell me landscaping service
 
2013-06-23 09:04:06 PM  
Thread TL;DR, but has anyone mentioned yet that this  isn't the true Grand Canyon he's walking over???

The spot he's walking over is over the Little Colorado River, which, by definition, is not part of the Grand Canyon of the Colorado River.  It's actually a 12 mile drive southeast from the eastern edge of the National Park entrance, within Navajo lands.  You couldn't do a walk across the *actual* Grand Canyon, as its width is usually measured in miles.  So while it's still relatively impressive to walk a tightrope a thousand feet up, it is not what they've been advertising this as.

\drove past this spot on vacation last month, actually
 
2013-06-23 09:04:33 PM  
Why is there a paramedic on the canyon floor?
 
2013-06-23 09:04:53 PM  
1400 feet is not longer than 4 football fields.  Football fields are 120 yards long.  4 football fields would be 1440 feet.
 
2013-06-23 09:05:44 PM  

Zebulon: Ok, I figured it out now, I was getting my time zones confused. I thought the show was only scheduled to last another 20 minutes. He has an *hour* and 20 minutes before he is over his time slot. My bad.


Yeah, they're really milking this one.
 
2013-06-23 09:05:58 PM  

donnielove: Ricardo Klement: donnielove: This is scheduled to go until 10:30?

I'm sure the first hour is all talking about how beautiful the Grand Canyon is and how insane this stunt is.

I assumed they had covered that in the 2 hour pre-show I ignored.


There was a 2-hour pre-show?

Jesus - game 7 of the NBA Finals almost got less attention.
 
2013-06-23 09:06:48 PM  
I wish the guy luck. He's got balls the size of the moon.
 
2013-06-23 09:07:06 PM  
Is he going to do this at night with a flashlight or what?
 
2013-06-23 09:07:30 PM  

FriarReb98: Thread TL;DR, but has anyone mentioned yet that this  isn't the true Grand Canyon he's walking over???

The spot he's walking over is over the Little Colorado River, which, by definition, is not part of the Grand Canyon of the Colorado River.  It's actually a 12 mile drive southeast from the eastern edge of the National Park entrance, within Navajo lands.  You couldn't do a walk across the *actual* Grand Canyon, as its width is usually measured in miles.  So while it's still relatively impressive to walk a tightrope a thousand feet up, it is not what they've been advertising this as.

\drove past this spot on vacation last month, actually


http://maps.google.com/?ll=35.96138,-111.64675&z=13&t=h apparently.
 
2013-06-23 09:07:34 PM  
Wait, he's not even at the starting point?  He has to take a helicopter to get there?  This is never going to actually happen, is it?
 
2013-06-23 09:07:58 PM  

FriarReb98: Thread TL;DR, but has anyone mentioned yet


Sorry, got bored and stopped reading.
 
2013-06-23 09:08:20 PM  
Jack Hanna also there for some reason.
 
2013-06-23 09:09:02 PM  

donnielove: Wait, he's not even at the starting point?  He has to take a helicopter to get there?  This is never going to actually happen, is it?


he already fell.  this is all pre-recorded BS until they can come up with a plausible excuse
 
2013-06-23 09:09:14 PM  

Psycat: Igor Jakovsky: Psycat: rhiannon: Psycat: Fuggin Bizzy: Psycat: Any of you young'uns remember Evel Knievel?  People would drive hundreds of miles and sit around for hours--and then his actual stunt would take maybe 10 seconds.  Why do people go through all that trouble for a peak experience that's over in almost no time at all?

Explain that to me, and I'll explain the Kentucky Derby to you.

It really baffles me that people will devote a whole day when the main event lasts minutes or even seconds...

John Force wants to know what you mean by "a whole day"?

Who's John Force?  Is he a friend of Max Powers?

Famous funny car driver.  Has hot daughters who also race.

A-hah, good name for a funny car driver.  Max Power (not Powers) was an alternative personality of one Homer J. Simpson, whose "Whoo, hoo!" is often used by pathetic geeks.


Oh Im well aware of Mr. Simpson

Max Power, that's the man who's name you'd love to touch,
but you musn't touch!
That name sounds good in your ear, but when you say it,
you musn't fear.
'Cause that name could be said by anyone!
 
2013-06-23 09:09:20 PM  
JACK HANNA!

lookin rather leathery
 
2013-06-23 09:10:14 PM  

wxboy: http://maps.google.com/?ll=35.96138,-111.64675&z=13&t=h apparently.


Yup.  Zooming out to see what the real Grand Canyon looks like (to the northwest of there) kinda puts this in perspective.  Still impressive, but totally BS.
 
2013-06-23 09:10:34 PM  

Flashlight: Looks like I will have to choose between this and Breaking Amish


You could watch Whodunnit.
 
2013-06-23 09:11:13 PM  
He better not do it.  There are scorpions and snakes down there.
 
2013-06-23 09:13:38 PM  

donnielove: 1400 feet is not longer than 4 football fields.  Football fields are 120 yards long.  4 football fields would be 1440 feet.


Check your math, Skippy.
 
2013-06-23 09:13:43 PM  
For the love of Pikachu, let's get on with it!
 
2013-06-23 09:13:45 PM  

RRicochet: I wish the guy luck. He's got balls the size of the moon.


That may make it hard for him to walk.
 
2013-06-23 09:15:17 PM  
Nvm.

I really need to drink more.
 
2013-06-23 09:15:26 PM  

cowbell204: Why is there a paramedic on the canyon floor?


To resesucitate any prairie dogs he falls on.
 
2013-06-23 09:16:00 PM  

Tiberius Sulla: donnielove: 1400 feet is not longer than 4 football fields.  Football fields are 120 yards long.  4 football fields would be 1440 feet.

Check your math, Skippy.


Which math is he supposed to check exactly?
 
2013-06-23 09:16:09 PM  
The countdown is now approaching zero!

What was it approaching before?
 
2013-06-23 09:16:16 PM  
Why oh why am I watching this horseshiat?
 
2013-06-23 09:17:18 PM  
They've called it off due to his blood pressure reading.
 
2013-06-23 09:17:21 PM  
Karma is a beyotch. If he falls, I'm gonna go take a shiat and go to bed.
 
2013-06-23 09:17:36 PM  

Tiberius Sulla: donnielove: 1400 feet is not longer than 4 football fields.  Football fields are 120 yards long.  4 football fields would be 1440 feet.

Check your math, Skippy.


3x120=360
360x4=1440

how's that, chief?
 
2013-06-23 09:18:03 PM  

donnielove: The countdown is now approaching zero!

What was it approaching before?


Near Zero.  It's math.
 
2013-06-23 09:19:08 PM  
Isn't Joel Osteen a televangelist?  I kinda sorta remember him because he's the only one who doesn't speak with a southern-fried accent and is a heck of a lot more positive than somebody like John Hagee...
 
2013-06-23 09:19:12 PM  

Lt. Cheese Weasel: donnielove: The countdown is now approaching zero!

What was it approaching before?

Near Zero.  It's math.


Which apparently I can't do
 
2013-06-23 09:19:27 PM  

FriarReb98: Thread TL;DR, but has anyone mentioned yet that this  isn't the true Grand Canyon he's walking over???

The spot he's walking over is over the Little Colorado River, which, by definition, is not part of the Grand Canyon of the Colorado River.  It's actually a 12 mile drive southeast from the eastern edge of the National Park entrance, within Navajo lands.  You couldn't do a walk across the *actual* Grand Canyon, as its width is usually measured in miles.  So while it's still relatively impressive to walk a tightrope a thousand feet up, it is not what they've been advertising this as.

\drove past this spot on vacation last month, actually


I doubt the National Park Service would let someone perform a stunt in which that someone may die on their land on TV.

/also I did mention this earlier.  I even had a link so neeners.
//Joel Osteen, prosperity gospel guy? Really?
 
2013-06-23 09:19:47 PM  
"We're just minutes away now." As opposed to when this program started and we were hours away.
 
2013-06-23 09:21:25 PM  

Triumph: They've called it off due to his blood pressure reading.


What??? Honest Injun?  I don't actually own a television so I can't tell if there's actually any crowds of spectators there, or if they actually did call it off.  It would suck if they drove hundreds of miles to see basically nothing--except Joel Osteen, I guess...
 
2013-06-23 09:22:28 PM  
Wife is hot
 
2013-06-23 09:22:39 PM  

Tiberius Sulla: donnielove: 1400 feet is not longer than 4 football fields.  Football fields are 120 yards long.  4 football fields would be 1440 feet.

Check your math, Skippy.


Is he making a Candian football field joke?
 
2013-06-23 09:22:53 PM  
When do they bring out the bicycle riding bear? I always liked that part.
 
2013-06-23 09:23:00 PM  
Jesus Christ. Are they praying with Joel Osteen? Really? REALLY?

Attention whores EVERYWHERE.
 
2013-06-23 09:23:01 PM  
SOON
 
2013-06-23 09:23:06 PM  

Psycat: Triumph: They've called it off due to his blood pressure reading.

What??? Honest Injun?  I don't actually own a television so I can't tell if there's actually any crowds of spectators there, or if they actually did call it off.  It would suck if they drove hundreds of miles to see basically nothing--except Joel Osteen, I guess...


There isn't an audience, per se, though I'm sure there's more than just crew at the site.
 
2013-06-23 09:23:26 PM  

Triumph: "We're just minutes away now." As opposed to when this program started and we were hours away.


They're just milking it.  Just like 'milking the bull'.  And is there anything to your claim that they called it off due to high blood pressure?
 
2013-06-23 09:24:30 PM  
I really hope he falls now, so we can blame it on Joel Osteen for not praying hard enough.
 
2013-06-23 09:24:46 PM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Jesus Christ. Are they praying with Joel Osteen? Really? REALLY?

Attention whores EVERYWHERE.


Nik is a Jesus Freak, he downplays it for some audiences and let's his (Jesus) freak flag fly for others.  Maybe he'll get to meet Him sooner than later?
 
2013-06-23 09:24:50 PM  

Triumph: They've called it off due to his blood pressure reading.


Fark you.
 
2013-06-23 09:24:55 PM  
Watching the build up to this all I can think is, we've finally reached a point where it's marginally alright to broadcast someone dying live.  Discovery!
 
2013-06-23 09:25:24 PM  

ThePea: Psycat: Triumph: They've called it off due to his blood pressure reading.

What??? Honest Injun?  I don't actually own a television so I can't tell if there's actually any crowds of spectators there, or if they actually did call it off.  It would suck if they drove hundreds of miles to see basically nothing--except Joel Osteen, I guess...

There isn't an audience, per se, though I'm sure there's more than just crew at the site.


I'm guessing there's millions of frustrated TV viewers who have better things to do.  And tens of Farkers who have nothing better to do.

/I could always milk the bull
//or watch a Buster Keaton comedy
 
2013-06-23 09:26:05 PM  

Psycat: Triumph: They've called it off due to his blood pressure reading.

What??? Honest Injun?  I don't actually own a television so I can't tell if there's actually any crowds of spectators there, or if they actually did call it off.  It would suck if they drove hundreds of miles to see basically nothing--except Joel Osteen, I guess...


what's a "television"
 
2013-06-23 09:26:31 PM  
Here we go.
 
2013-06-23 09:26:51 PM  

ThePea: ecmoRandomNumbers: Jesus Christ. Are they praying with Joel Osteen? Really? REALLY?

Attention whores EVERYWHERE.

Nik is a Jesus Freak, he downplays it for some audiences and let's his (Jesus) freak flag fly for others.  Maybe he'll get to meet Him sooner than later?


Let's see who holds god to account if he falls.

BTW - an interview with Joel Osteen means we have to drink continuously until he's off camera.
 
2013-06-23 09:27:02 PM  

try fect taa daa: Wife is hot


And potentially available.
 
2013-06-23 09:27:05 PM  

Psycat: Triumph: They've called it off due to his blood pressure reading.

What??? Honest Injun?  I don't actually own a television so I can't tell if there's actually any crowds of spectators there, or if they actually did call it off.  It would suck if they drove hundreds of miles to see basically nothing--except Joel Osteen, I guess...


No, still going. And no crowds of spectators at the site. The Navajo set up a jumbotron a few miles away for spectators.
 
2013-06-23 09:27:58 PM  

SpikeStrip: Psycat: Triumph: They've called it off due to his blood pressure reading.

What??? Honest Injun?  I don't actually own a television so I can't tell if there's actually any crowds of spectators there, or if they actually did call it off.  It would suck if they drove hundreds of miles to see basically nothing--except Joel Osteen, I guess...

what's a "television"


An object that's bigger than a breadbox and full of crap, like a toilet, but with cubic zirconia being hawked by people who toot horns for elderly women who live in Iowa.  Something like that...
 
2013-06-23 09:28:03 PM  
They just used the word drop
 
2013-06-23 09:28:09 PM  
t's happening!  LIVE AS IT HAPPENS! HE"S NOW CHANGING HIS PANTS!
 
2013-06-23 09:28:26 PM  
No safety wire, no net.

I assume he has a parachute on his back?
 
2013-06-23 09:28:38 PM  
That would be wack if the helicopter crashed.
 
2013-06-23 09:28:46 PM  
biatch crazy.

/pray inspire pray dreams performer pray pray pray
 
2013-06-23 09:28:55 PM  

Popcorn Johnny: try fect taa daa: Wife is hot

And potentially available.


Your best bet would be to catch her at the funeral while she's emotionally vulnerable.
 
2013-06-23 09:29:04 PM  

Popcorn Johnny: try fect taa daa: Wife is hot

And potentially available.


zing!
 
2013-06-23 09:29:27 PM  

Psycat: SpikeStrip: Psycat: Triumph: They've called it off due to his blood pressure reading.

What??? Honest Injun?  I don't actually own a television so I can't tell if there's actually any crowds of spectators there, or if they actually did call it off.  It would suck if they drove hundreds of miles to see basically nothing--except Joel Osteen, I guess...

what's a "television"

An object that's bigger than a breadbox and full of crap, like a toilet, but with cubic zirconia being hawked by people who toot horns for elderly women who live in Iowa.  Something like that...


What an oddly apt explanation.
 
2013-06-23 09:29:39 PM  

Psycat: Triumph: "We're just minutes away now." As opposed to when this program started and we were hours away.

They're just milking it.  Just like 'milking the bull'.  And is there anything to your claim that they called it off due to high blood pressure?


No - I was just poking fun at the drama build up as the doctor takes his BP for the cameras.
 
2013-06-23 09:30:11 PM  
OMG!  I....I....GOTA GO WALKIES.
 
2013-06-23 09:30:36 PM  
Undertaking. Ha
 
2013-06-23 09:30:46 PM  

ManRay: No safety wire, no net.

I assume he has a parachute on his back?


He has a 2 inch cable to hang on.  He says he has practiced hanging on the cable. There are rescue baskets at each end of the wire and helicopters on each side of the canyon. Assuming he doesn't outright fall, and is actually able to grab the wire and hold on, they can have him off the wire in 60 seconds.
 
2013-06-23 09:30:47 PM  
I am so nervous
 
2013-06-23 09:30:52 PM  

try fect taa daa: They just used the word drop


Is that like saying "no hitter"?
 
2013-06-23 09:31:12 PM  

puppetmaster745: Popcorn Johnny: try fect taa daa: Wife is hot

And potentially available.

Your best bet would be to catch her at the funeral while she's emotionally vulnerable.


img.fark.net
 
2013-06-23 09:31:18 PM  

Triumph: Psycat: Triumph: "We're just minutes away now." As opposed to when this program started and we were hours away.

They're just milking it.  Just like 'milking the bull'.  And is there anything to your claim that they called it off due to high blood pressure?

No - I was just poking fun at the drama build up as the doctor takes his BP for the cameras.


They should be taking a stool sample--I'll bet he's ready to give up a specimen...
 
2013-06-23 09:31:36 PM  
STOP SAYING IT'S THE GRAND CANYON!

ferfrkksakes.
 
2013-06-23 09:32:05 PM  
"Nothing to break his fall"

--except for the canyon floor.  And possibly the paramedic if he has good aim.
 
2013-06-23 09:32:05 PM  
OK - I'm watching the live feed online and the Discovery Channel.  The live feed is 12 seconds behind TDC, which I understand is 10 seconds delayed.

Weak sauce, guys.
 
2013-06-23 09:32:13 PM  

Flashlight: I am so nervous


As bitter as the build up has made me, my stomach is definitely queasy right now.
 
2013-06-23 09:32:29 PM  
That would have been great if he trips a couple of times walking out there just for the looks on peoples faces.
 
2013-06-23 09:32:30 PM  
10 second delay X= to a live feed.
 
2013-06-23 09:32:50 PM  
Hey it's Niks crotch.
 
2013-06-23 09:33:33 PM  
He should stop halfway, drop his pants, and take the world's highest dump ever.
 
2013-06-23 09:33:41 PM  
His wife is dressed for a dinner party, and he's dressed to mow the lawn.  Seems strange.
 
2013-06-23 09:33:44 PM  
Oh come on.  He didn't think to tape his balance pole until just now?
 
2013-06-23 09:34:15 PM  

FC Exile: Hey it's Niks crotch.


Hi, Nik's Crotch; feeling a little sweaty right about now?
 
2013-06-23 09:34:29 PM  

NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: The Navajo set up a jumbotron a few miles away for spectators.


Did they set up a miniature casino to take bets on whether he'd make it?
 
2013-06-23 09:34:58 PM  
That farking douchebag on the live feed - I wonder how badly he'll cream his jeans when Nik falls and their twit feed skyrockets.
 
2013-06-23 09:35:14 PM  
faaaaaaaaaaaap sister
 
2013-06-23 09:35:24 PM  
"Naked and Afraid"???  What is this???

PUT SOME CLOTHES ON, FFS.
 
2013-06-23 09:35:28 PM  
Did they just show a bare ass on a commercial? The crazy christers are going to be complaining all week.
 
2013-06-23 09:35:56 PM  

Mugato: NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: The Navajo set up a jumbotron a few miles away for spectators.

Did they set up a miniature casino to take bets on whether he'd make it?


I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thought that!
 
2013-06-23 09:36:20 PM  

rhiannon: Is this going to be another "Oh thank you Jesus, thank you dear Jesus" deal like last time? Or do they not have him mic'd.


Considering he had tele-charlatan joel olsteen in his camper before the walk, I'm gonna have to say "you betcha!"
 
2013-06-23 09:36:34 PM  

FC Exile: Hey it's Niks crotch.


I quickly wondered whether packing left or right would go through his mind, then thought it'd be best to wear a cup 'cuz if you fell on the wire without a cup you can forget about that whole hangin' on for 60 seconds part.
 
2013-06-23 09:37:02 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Oh come on.  He didn't think to tape his balance pole until just now?


Oh, who can remember all the little details? Tape, shoes, etc.
 
2013-06-23 09:37:14 PM  
farkS SAKE!  JUST farkING GO!
 
2013-06-23 09:37:44 PM  
Cantore.  Push-up briefs, or semi-erect?
 
2013-06-23 09:37:48 PM  
i.dailymail.co.uk

YAWN
 
2013-06-23 09:37:59 PM  
Again, he should think about this. Don't do it Dude.
 
2013-06-23 09:38:02 PM  
He should be wearing a Evel Knievel outfit.
 
2013-06-23 09:38:04 PM  

Mugato: NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: The Navajo set up a jumbotron a few miles away for spectators.

Did they set up a miniature casino to take bets on whether he'd make it?


Actually, the network set up the Jumbotron a few miles away for the Navajo, who are not allowed to spectate directly on their own land. Oh, the irony!!
 
2013-06-23 09:38:07 PM  
Here comes two...
 
2013-06-23 09:38:08 PM  

Lt. Cheese Weasel: farkS SAKE!  JUST farkING GO!

 
2013-06-23 09:38:09 PM  
www.behindthevoiceactors.com
Hey, have that cartoon sound effect guy cue up the (falling bomb whistle) and then top it off with a (squish) and if there's time before commercial be ready with a wah-wah-wah-wah.
 
2013-06-23 09:38:12 PM  
SOMEONE HOLD ME
 
2013-06-23 09:38:21 PM  
Holy shiat!  It actually started!
 
2013-06-23 09:38:55 PM  
heeeeeeeeeeeeeere we go
 
2013-06-23 09:39:08 PM  
Oh crap he's got a microphone.
 
2013-06-23 09:39:13 PM  
I want him to fall now. Stop thanking Jesus and walk
 
2013-06-23 09:39:16 PM  
Damn - anyone playing the drinking game is going to be totally alcohol poisoned by the end of it!
 
2013-06-23 09:39:39 PM  
Aaaaand it's going to be Jesus all the way across. Unless he falls, and then it's "Holy shi-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i..."
 
2013-06-23 09:39:43 PM  
I missed the Niagara Falls crossing, is he gonna be praising Jesus the whole time?
 
2013-06-23 09:39:55 PM  

Great_Milenko: rhiannon: Is this going to be another "Oh thank you Jesus, thank you dear Jesus" deal like last time? Or do they not have him mic'd.

Considering he had tele-charlatan joel olsteen in his camper before the walk, I'm gonna have to say "you betcha!"


With all the evangelizing going on, what would be a hoot is if he fell off his wire, shouted "Help me, Zeus!" while falling, and survived because he bounced off some air mattresses left behind by some Wiccans who had celebrated Summer Solstice a few days earlier...
 
2013-06-23 09:40:12 PM  

rhiannon: Oh crap he's got a microphone.


Shuts volume off.
 
2013-06-23 09:40:15 PM  
Oh man. Nuts
 
2013-06-23 09:40:27 PM  

ManRay: No safety wire, no net.

I assume he has a parachute on his back?


No. If he falls, he has to grab the walk wire on his way past or he goes splat. His wife said earlier that he believes that if he has any sort of safety device, it will make him not concentrate as much since he would know he has a backup if something goes wrong.
 
2013-06-23 09:40:28 PM  
He's said "Lord", "God", "Jesus", "God", and "Jesus" "Jesus" "Jesus".  Sort of reminds me of the Farting Preacher for some reason.  I'm just gonna finish my drink now.
 
2013-06-23 09:40:29 PM  
are jeans really the best tight rope walking apparel?
 
2013-06-23 09:40:31 PM  
Imagine the reaction if the feed goes out due to a technical fault and not because he fell.
 
2013-06-23 09:40:31 PM  
Oh yeah, he's gonna fall.
 
2013-06-23 09:40:39 PM  
Ironically, Jesus has a c-note riding on him falling.
 
2013-06-23 09:40:40 PM  
i gotta say, i'm having a hard time watching this.
 
2013-06-23 09:40:42 PM  
img14.imageshack.us
 
2013-06-23 09:40:47 PM  
Looking down, makes you want to spit.
 
2013-06-23 09:40:50 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Damn - anyone playing the drinking game is going to be totally alcohol poisoned by the end of it!


That was my thought - more people will miss work tomdorrow due to hangovers than after the Superbowl
 
2013-06-23 09:40:51 PM  
Camera #4 on the discovery semi live feed is farking terrifying.
 
2013-06-23 09:40:54 PM  

Deep Contact: He should be wearing a Evel Knievel outfit.


He should be wearing a parachute and a pair of brown pants...
 
2013-06-23 09:41:18 PM  
Annnnd he's already had to sit down once....BAD sign....
 
2013-06-23 09:41:19 PM  
I'm sitting on my couch and watching him is making me sick. F*cking insane.
 
2013-06-23 09:41:24 PM  
oh crazy Jesus thank you Jesus....I'm turning off the sound.
 
2013-06-23 09:41:28 PM  
Oh, Jesus is the name of the guy in the white hat!
 
2013-06-23 09:41:29 PM  
Maybe he'll fall and a parachute with the British flag will open like in Moonraker!
 
2013-06-23 09:41:37 PM  
This guy is batshiat insane. I can't watch this.
 
2013-06-23 09:41:43 PM  
oh shiat all he cameras went black.  what happened>!?!
 
2013-06-23 09:41:51 PM  
Now I see why they have this on a Sunday.
Dude is "praising Jesus" so much with "the authority of Christ" that he may as well be walking across the pews in church.
 
2013-06-23 09:41:52 PM  
O.o

NOPE
 
2013-06-23 09:41:57 PM  
I can't farking watch this. I can't imagine what he is feelin. Sunday night suicide? I am at least learning how to pray.
 
2013-06-23 09:42:12 PM  
I'll admit it, this is hard to watch.
 
2013-06-23 09:42:21 PM  
He's not going to make it. He's scared out of his mind, and it looks like he's not in a good mood (everything is going wrong)
 
2013-06-23 09:42:27 PM  
Holy shiat does he have a long way to walk
 
2013-06-23 09:42:50 PM  
Ok so everyone's impressed now - Grand Canyon or no, American or Canadian football fields
 
2013-06-23 09:42:54 PM  
Is this what fundies sound like in the bedroom?
 
2013-06-23 09:43:03 PM  
He sounds like he's getting pounded by Jesus. "Oh you're my king. Oh yes Jesus. Yes Jesus. You're so good. I love you Jesus. Yes Jesus. That's my king."
 
2013-06-23 09:43:13 PM  
Cam 4 or nothing!
 
2013-06-23 09:43:36 PM  
"Help me, Jebus!"
 
2013-06-23 09:43:38 PM  
He seems really nervous.
 
2013-06-23 09:43:45 PM  
Circus of The Lord holy crap
 
2013-06-23 09:43:46 PM  
Bullsh*t..I can see wires...
 
2013-06-23 09:43:58 PM  
Damn - he's having a hard time.  He can't keep his head together like he usually does.
 
2013-06-23 09:44:04 PM  

Arachnophobe: He sounds like he's getting pounded by Jesus. "Oh you're my king. Oh yes Jesus. Yes Jesus. You're so good. I love you Jesus. Yes Jesus. That's my king."


Came to say that.
 
2013-06-23 09:44:07 PM  
The height thing is freaking me out.
The shubs just said that the whole Jesus this and Lord that keeps him focused as he is walking.
My ADHD would be all Thank you Jesu...oh shiat that's a long way down...can I turn around..
 
2013-06-23 09:44:35 PM  
oh crazy Jesus thank you Jesus....I'm turning off the sound.


---

tempted to do that myself

You would think this guy is being baptized or watching his wife give birth.

I mean, I don't really blame him.....I'd be scared shiatless too......but still, it's like he's reciting Psalms 1-10,000
 
2013-06-23 09:44:36 PM  
Hey, I can see my house down there!
 
2013-06-23 09:44:41 PM  
Is he really saying all of that out loud? I'm watching a movie.
 
2013-06-23 09:44:43 PM  

cameroncrazy1984: I want him to fall now. Stop thanking Jesus and walk


I knew that was coming
 
2013-06-23 09:44:52 PM  
thats a pretty thick wire. cripes that must be easy
 
2013-06-23 09:44:56 PM  

Arachnophobe: He sounds like he's getting pounded by Jesus. "Oh you're my king. Oh yes Jesus. Yes Jesus. You're so good. I love you Jesus. Yes Jesus. That's my king."


<spurble>

New laptop.  You owe me one.

That said, it's really REALLY farking annoying.
 
2013-06-23 09:45:00 PM