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(Baltimore Brew)   Dollar General clerk goes Full Jedi on robber: "I said 'you don't want to do this' and I said it three times"   (digtriad.com) divider line 16
    More: Hero, robbery, Chris Salzer, clerk  
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11225 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Jun 2013 at 6:15 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-06-22 04:04:58 PM
7 votes:
img.fark.net
2013-06-22 07:11:41 PM
6 votes:
img.fark.net
2013-06-22 03:54:18 PM
5 votes:
img.fark.net
2013-06-22 04:10:56 PM
4 votes:
Someone robbed a Dollar General? Not exactly Ocean's 11, is it?
2013-06-22 06:38:54 PM
3 votes:
Does Dollar General even carry Death Sticks?
2013-06-22 06:34:49 PM
2 votes:

you are a puppet: Recoil Therapy: The manager is VERY lucky that he didn't get blown away when he hitched up his pants & reached around back behind him.  When I saw that I thought I was about to see someone trying to draw down on someone who already had a pistol somewhat at the ready.  Unlike the movies that almost never works out well for the person trying to draw.

/why would you rob a Dollar General?
//Especially first thing in the morning when the only money around is the $30 or so in/for change per register.

Or alternatively, this guy is very lucky that he hitched his pants up and reached around back behind him. The would be robber felt like he was dealing with a real badass, a wild west gunslinger type. There was no way that the robber was going to get the drop on Doc Holiday. "You don't wanna do this", Doc warned, and the robber realized he was in over his head. He's seen Tombstone.



I'm out of date on my street talk. Whats "I'll be your huckleberry" in current street talk?
2013-06-22 06:27:50 PM
2 votes:

Recoil Therapy: The manager is VERY lucky that he didn't get blown away when he hitched up his pants & reached around back behind him.  When I saw that I thought I was about to see someone trying to draw down on someone who already had a pistol somewhat at the ready.  Unlike the movies that almost never works out well for the person trying to draw.

/why would you rob a Dollar General?
//Especially first thing in the morning when the only money around is the $30 or so in/for change per register.


heh heh, you said reached around.
2013-06-22 06:24:36 PM
2 votes:
HERO: "And as I'm walking I'm thinking in my head, okay, what's the best thing to do in this situation," he said. "I'm there thinking, God, please help me."

And there we have it, folks. Definitive proof that God's chosen religion is Jedi, after all! No further proof is needed for me. I am now Gnostic Jedi.
2013-06-22 06:19:59 PM
2 votes:
Why are you waving your hand around like that? Do you think that you're some sort of Jedi?
2013-06-22 06:18:07 PM
2 votes:
Or have the junior street level capitalist think that he was reaching around to draw a pistol.  Either way could get really bad really fast.

/don't bring droopy pants to a possible gun fight
m00
2013-06-22 11:48:15 PM
1 votes:
"When I saw him with shades on, dark hat, a hoodie and with his hand on a gun and I hear it cocked, I knew he wasn't just walking by,"

The manager should be locked up for racism and discrimination. Just because someone has a hoodie, doesn't mean you can assume he's up to no good... maybe the so-called "criminal" just wanted to buy some skittles.
2013-06-22 07:17:30 PM
1 votes:
"I'm a manager at dollar general" sounds like a good way to open up a suicide note.
2013-06-22 06:52:46 PM
1 votes:

Slappajo: I didn't take it as the manager saying it from a 'I'm a bad ass' perspective but more from a 'dude, you're going to f*ck your life up over 50 bucks' perspective.


Or made him reconsider: "What the hell is in a Dollar Store that I even want?"
2013-06-22 06:43:56 PM
1 votes:

Moodybastard: I'm out of date on my street talk. Whats "I'll be your huckleberry" in current street talk?


urbandictionary.com has this:

huckleberry: An person who, owing to weakness other inferiority, is forced to become another person's biatch.
     Next time Craig talks shiat to me, I'm going to beat his little ass and make him my huckleberry.
2013-06-22 06:32:39 PM
1 votes:
These  are the droids you're looking for.img.fark.net
2013-06-22 05:28:18 PM
1 votes:
This is not the Dollar General you want to rob. You'll be moving along.
 
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