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(Quartz)   Starbucks is raising prices but will still misspell your name on your cup   (qz.com) divider line 135
    More: Amusing, Starbucks, J.M. Smucker, Maxwell House, coffee, quartz  
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5064 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Jun 2013 at 11:10 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-21 08:00:30 PM  
Why is this news, lots of places raise prices.
 
2013-06-21 08:51:04 PM  
I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.
 
2013-06-21 10:34:14 PM  
My Starbucks name is Gunther.  It's rarely misspelled.
 
2013-06-21 11:05:16 PM  
If I ever need my name on a cup at Starbuck's, please kill me
 
2013-06-21 11:14:26 PM  
My name is hard for some people to pronounce, so I always give an easy fake one.  They know (because I use debit) and they don't care.
 
2013-06-21 11:15:33 PM  
I work within the coffee industry, and it's no secret that Starbucks serves some of the lowest grade bean blends available. I can't believe there's so many people that actually appreciate what they serve as "premium" coffee.

Enjoy your price increase, idiots.

/You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...
 
2013-06-21 11:16:27 PM  
If all you want is a regular cup of black coffee Starbucks is excellent and has pretty reasonable prices
 
2013-06-21 11:16:36 PM  

skantea: My name is hard for some people to pronounce, so I always give an easy fake one.  They know (because I use debit) and they don't care.


Jimmedah Crackedcorn is that you?
 
2013-06-21 11:18:55 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-21 11:20:45 PM  

blacksharpiemarker: I work within the coffee industry, and it's no secret that Starbucks serves some of the lowest grade bean blends available. I can't believe there's so many people that actually appreciate what they serve as "premium" coffee.

Enjoy your price increase, idiots.

/You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...


You're on teevee!

/I hate Starbucks, too. The coffee carts in New York on the curb outside Starbucks serve better coffee, at one-third the price.
 
2013-06-21 11:21:19 PM  

blacksharpiemarker: lowest grade bean blends available.


Their drip coffee served in the stores is quite bad. Actually, most places have bad (overcooked) drip coffee.
 
2013-06-21 11:21:20 PM  

blacksharpiemarker: I work within the coffee industry, and it's no secret that Starbucks serves some of the lowest grade bean blends available. I can't believe there's so many people that actually appreciate what they serve as "premium" coffee.

Enjoy your price increase, idiots.

/You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...


I worked in the coffee industry for nine years and I can tell you I never heard that.  In fact it was usually the case that people would complain about starbucks buying up entire harvests from some of the best plantations and driving up the costs by overspending to get those beans.

I did leave the industry in 2006 so maybe things have changed.
 
2013-06-21 11:22:28 PM  
Tray, Trae, Tre (not sure how make an accent over the e on my phone).

No one can spell Trey!
 
2013-06-21 11:23:23 PM  
I forgot Jay, Ray, Grey, Tracy, and Terry.
 
2013-06-21 11:24:08 PM  

Voiceofreason01: If all you want is a regular cup of black coffee Starbucks is excellent and has pretty reasonable prices


img.fark.net
 
2013-06-21 11:24:31 PM  

texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.


Good for you? Also, I fail to see the amusing part in prices going up but honestly think Starbucks is kind of expensive for OK coffee anyway.
 
2013-06-21 11:29:06 PM  

texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.


Worked for Starbucks for 3 years when I was 19.  When people laugh, I point out this was in the late 90s early 2000s when it was me, 1 other cool guy, and 11 hot women.  Couldn't ask for a better work environment in retail.

That being said, I was too young to enjoy coffee, so I drank hot chocolate (drinks are free for employees during the day)...it wasn't until I left that I was old enough to go back and physically want coffee.  Ironic I'm sure.

People rag on Starbucks way too much.  It takes are real moron to screw up coffee...most assume starbucks tastes bad because it's DIFFERENT...what they don't understand is they brew in a way that brings out the true nature of coffee.  The best way to get your flavor hands down from any brew though, is to use a French Press.  Metal/gold filters are the best way to go.  I'm rambling, but yeah...suck it haters, just because it's brewed differently doesn't mean it's bad...it means you don't want to admit you pay $2 for a cup of coffee just like the rest of us.
 
GBB
2013-06-21 11:29:52 PM  
www.technologytell.com

Just get the home version, Verismo.
 
2013-06-21 11:31:39 PM  
Doesn't sound like venti black iced coffees are going up in price, so I'm good.
 
2013-06-21 11:31:51 PM  
IDGAF how they spell my name, so long as I get whipped cream on my coffee/sugar drink.
 
2013-06-21 11:32:04 PM  

texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.


Your contribution is valuable.

MaudlinMutantMollusk: If I ever need my name on a cup at Starbuck's, please kill me


You got it, big guy.  is your name a play on Obsequious Opaque Squid?

blacksharpiemarker: I work within the coffee industry, and it's no secret that Starbucks serves some of the lowest grade bean blends available. I can't believe there's so many people that actually appreciate what they serve as "premium" coffee.

Enjoy your price increase, idiots.

/You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...


Honors degree in the humanities?
 
2013-06-21 11:32:35 PM  

texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.


What does drinking coffee have to do with going in there?

Starbucks mostly serves milkshakes. Some of which might vaguely taste of coffee.
 
2013-06-21 11:32:35 PM  
www.killthehydra.com
 
2013-06-21 11:32:55 PM  

blacksharpiemarker: /You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...


Actually, I do, I just also recognize friendly service vs. somebody who will act like a douchebag over me ordering the "wrong" way.
 
2013-06-21 11:34:32 PM  
I can hardly wait to show my elitism by paying $12 for a cup of Joe.  Suck it minimum wage fark hatas!

/sarc it
 
2013-06-21 11:36:30 PM  
img.fark.net

/I'll have what he's having.
 
2013-06-21 11:36:57 PM  
I like Starbucks coffee OK, but there independent coffee places near both my home and work.

For those of you in Chicagoland, Alchemy in Wilmette IL has the best coffee I have ever tried. Much cheaper than Starbucks and much better, too.
 
2013-06-21 11:47:13 PM  
Subby = Swarley
 
2013-06-21 11:49:04 PM  

gnadfly: I can hardly wait to show my elitism by paying $12 for a cup of Joe.


Then give Copenhagen a try. A Frappuccino is about $14.
 
2013-06-21 11:54:04 PM  
 
2013-06-21 11:54:23 PM  

ImpendingCynic: gnadfly: I can hardly wait to show my elitism by paying $12 for a cup of Joe.

Then give Copenhagen a try. A Frappuccino is about $14.


cost is less than $0.30

Good on you starbucks capitalism hee!
 
2013-06-21 11:55:16 PM  
I always figured they deliberately misspelled names. Mostly because that's what I'd do in their shoes.
 
2013-06-21 11:58:08 PM  

GBB: [www.technologytell.com image 449x326]

Just get the home version, Verismo.


dammit i came just to post this. good call.

//shar-shar
 
2013-06-21 11:59:11 PM  
Starbucks Barista: "Your name, sir?"

Bob: "Bob."

*2 minutes later*

*Bob reads Bawb on his drink*
 
2013-06-22 12:01:27 AM  
"My name is Tim, not Tom"

"And my name is Bob, not Boob"

:P

Seriously, if your biggest "get fussed" is someone spelled your name wrong on a disposable cup, I want your problems.
 
2013-06-22 12:01:50 AM  
A company's having a few minor changes in their pricing structure, I must tell the world lest it go unnoticed.
 
2013-06-22 12:01:59 AM  
In all fairness, the name "TommyymmoT", doesn't fare well when spoken.
 
2013-06-22 12:03:12 AM  

WordsnCollision: [img.fark.net image 570x763]

/I'll have what he's having.


Forget the cup, the hand holding that cup is positively skeletal!
 
2013-06-22 12:03:14 AM  
They can't spell your name right because the poors who work in service jobs are barely trainable slack-jawed drones who would do well to be glad they even have a job. Harharhar *lights cigar with dolphin bone lighter and doffs top hat*

/amidoingitright?
 
2013-06-22 12:03:54 AM  

The My Little Pony Killer: blacksharpiemarker: /You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...

Actually, I do, I just also recognize friendly service vs. somebody who will act like a douchebag over me ordering the "wrong" way.


Sorry, I must come across as very hateful, but what I actually hate is corporations using clever marketing tactics to fool consumers into buying low quality product, then they become accustomed to the product, and quality begins to suffer.

This stands especially true in the North American market, where lower cost (lower quality) bean blends are formulated to satisfy "unique" consumer tastes and lower price expectations.

Luckily, I'm not on the service side of the industry because it would only frustrate me further.
 
2013-06-22 12:05:01 AM  

TommyymmoT: In all fairness, the name "TommyymmoT", doesn't fare well when spoken.


Tamme Yamod.
 
2013-06-22 12:08:25 AM  

blacksharpiemarker: The My Little Pony Killer: blacksharpiemarker: /You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...

Actually, I do, I just also recognize friendly service vs. somebody who will act like a douchebag over me ordering the "wrong" way.

Sorry, I must come across as very hateful, but what I actually hate is corporations using clever marketing tactics to fool consumers into buying low quality product, then they become accustomed to the product, and quality begins to suffer.

This stands especially true in the North American market, where lower cost (lower quality) bean blends are formulated to satisfy "unique" consumer tastes and lower price expectations.

Luckily, I'm not on the service side of the industry because it would only frustrate me further.


Last time I was in a Starbucks, the employees were talking into headsets to the people in drive up; it was eerie to stand at the counter waiting for someone to notice me while three employees were wandering around having one sided conversations.
 
2013-06-22 12:09:55 AM  
I'm sorry I misspelled your name.
I didn't know the dash wasn't silent.
My sincerest apologies Le-a.
 
2013-06-22 12:14:59 AM  
Supply and demand.  If people will keep paying for their drinks, then they would be fools to not raise their prices.

I like their mochas.  I can't stand their espresso.  But I'm spoiled.  At home I drink espresso made with 100% Jamaican Blue Mountain beans.  In fact, I just ordered three pounds today to replenish my dwindling supply.
 
2013-06-22 12:17:35 AM  

blacksharpiemarker: The My Little Pony Killer: blacksharpiemarker: /You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...

Actually, I do, I just also recognize friendly service vs. somebody who will act like a douchebag over me ordering the "wrong" way.

Sorry, I must come across as very hateful, but what I actually hate is corporations using clever marketing tactics to fool consumers into buying low quality product, then they become accustomed to the product, and quality begins to suffer.

This stands especially true in the North American market, where lower cost (lower quality) bean blends are formulated to satisfy "unique" consumer tastes and lower price expectations.

Luckily, I'm not on the service side of the industry because it would only frustrate me further.


I'm sure you know this pretty much describes the history of coffee in America and much of Europe for quite a long time. Starbucks isn't as much of a coffee company these days as it is a general consistently-enjoyable-beverage business, but back in the day they offered higher quality beans than most others and it was a big reason for their initial expansions. Then Frappublahblahs came out and exploded, and Starbucks learned that the less they focus on pure quality coffee, the more money they make. I mostly just wonder when they'll fall out of favor in the general business world, what it would take to make that happen.
 
2013-06-22 12:22:27 AM  
Hey, my ice cream in a plastic cup is a-okay!

/White mocha frappucino light. Always ask for no whip. Or they will put whip on it.
// Cup name is Mojo Jojo. I like making people say that.
 
2013-06-22 12:23:07 AM  

jn1512: In related news


A Dunkin Donuts just opened in my town, about 150 yards from Starbucks. It's gotta be the ugliest interior I've ever seen. It looks like Hardees, except much cheaper. The outside looks pretty nice, but the inside makes the local Starbucks look like the Biltmore.
 
2013-06-22 12:27:47 AM  

Staffist: My Starbucks name is Gunther.  It's rarely misspelled.


Is your last name Centralperk?
 
2013-06-22 12:29:53 AM  

texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.


encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com

 
2013-06-22 12:30:55 AM  
They are just preparing for the upcoming coffee apocalypse what with the south american coffee blight that is ongoing as I type.
 
2013-06-22 12:32:01 AM  
Suck it haters.  Starbucks and Peets are the best mass-produced coffee there is.
 
2013-06-22 12:35:51 AM  
Starbucks starSUCKS.  Tim Horton's rules.
 
2013-06-22 12:36:17 AM  

lewismarktwo: They are just preparing for the upcoming coffee apocalypse what with the south american coffee blight that is ongoing as I type.


Won't somebody think of Juan Valdez?
 
2013-06-22 12:37:01 AM  
Double-doubles, motherfarker. The extra large is chock full of sugar and caffeine and comes in at a toonie.

/a toonie, I say!
//my god but it's awful
 
2013-06-22 12:38:14 AM  
Last month I went to Starbucks for the first time in my life.  I'm almost 40.  Had a 4 year old gift card that, to their credit, was still valid.  The medium roast was decent, even better with the Carolans I had with me on the patio.  The egg white/spinach wrap wasn't bad either.  I know...a most cool story.
 
2013-06-22 12:46:14 AM  

ZeroCorpse: Starbucks starSUCKS.  Tim Horton's rules.


You sound Canadian.
 
2013-06-22 12:49:34 AM  
There are so many better drugs out there than caffeine
 
2013-06-22 12:50:02 AM  

Voiceofreason01: If all you want is a regular cup of black coffee Starbucks is excellent and has pretty reasonable prices


Honestly, if you just want a tall cup of black coffee, I'd rather stop at Dunkin Donuts or McDonald's.  Their regular coffee is just as good and half the price.

/Having a cup of McDonald's coffee while typing this
//The whiskey I put in makes it even better
 
2013-06-22 12:54:22 AM  
It's so much cheaper to buy premium beans from Stumptown or Blue Bottle and just make your own damn coffee.
 
2013-06-22 12:55:07 AM  
Fade2black:

Worked for Starbucks for 3 years when I was 19...That being said, I was too young to enjoy coffee

What? I've been downing at least a quart a day since I was 12. It was my consolation prize for having been made to go to Boy Scout camp and THEN a United Methodist Church camp. (And they'd object when I ran away from home on my own. Harrumph.) I got so sick of Manidokan after the first week -- my third week away in a month -- that I demanded my parents wire me a bus ticket, threatening to kill myself or run away and join the SLA or something if they left me out there one more weekend. It wasn't the camping, it was the other kids:  this might strike y'all Farkers as counterintuitive, but it takes a special kind of person to put up with my oddities in person.

So when I came home the old man tried to make it up to me by offering me a cup of coffee. The first cup gave me an instantaneous "Hell yeah!" so I drank five more. You can keep your heroin, I'm stuck on this stuff.

And Starbucks is okay sometimes, but it's strictly from hunger. I can make better at home from Wal-Mart store brand beans. (Wal-Mart selling Fair Trade coffee? Should I believe that?)

Somewhere around here I have a 5+ year old $10 Starbucks gift card. This month's sewer bill is hard to locate too. Maybe there's a connection? What could it MEAN??
 
2013-06-22 12:59:02 AM  

blacksharpiemarker: I work within the coffee industry, and it's no secret that Starbucks serves some of the lowest grade bean blends available. I can't believe there's so many people that actually appreciate what they serve as "premium" coffee.

Enjoy your price increase, idiots.

/You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...


img.fark.net
 
2013-06-22 01:00:26 AM  

LZeitgeist: Staffist: My Starbucks name is Gunther.  It's rarely misspelled.

Is your last name Centralperk?


OK, so I hadn't made that connection until now...  I'll leave it up to you then.  Give me a new one.
 
2013-06-22 01:00:52 AM  
Starbucks is okay but Coffee Bean is where its at in SoCal.  I think it tastes a bit smoother.

Peets is a bit too strong for my taste.
 
2013-06-22 01:01:57 AM  

TommyymmoT: In all fairness, the name "TommyymmoT", doesn't fare well when spoken.


I thought it was just pronounced "Rick".
 
2013-06-22 01:07:50 AM  
During the war the Germans were outta Joe.  They weren't getting shipments from South America, the only significant producer at the time.  They made stuff they called 'ersatz,' typically chicory and methadrine.  Of course, some people gotta have it.  You could if you could fork over, say, about $10K/lb, and some people did.  Personally, I would just surrender, probably if my enemies were capable of embargoing my 'fiene.
 
2013-06-22 01:08:28 AM  

blacksharpiemarker: I work within the coffee industry, and it's no secret that Starbucks serves some of the lowest grade bean blends available. I can't believe there's so many people that actually appreciate what they serve as "premium" coffee.

Enjoy your price increase, idiots.

/You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...


I only drink dry water, thankyouverymuch.

But yes, people who drink starbucks are so very often complete morons.
 
2013-06-22 01:10:26 AM  

Cerebral Infarktion: There are so many better drugs out there than caffeine


Yup, and 99% of them are illegal, since they don't promote workplace productivity.

Bottoms up, worker bees! Society commends your choice of beverage.
 
2013-06-22 01:11:32 AM  
Lucky for me I enjoy the free stuff at work just fine.   And at home I just rock the  HEB San Antonio flavor in a reuse able K cup.

/not a coffee snob whatsoever
 
2013-06-22 01:15:16 AM  

OgreMagi: ....

I like their mochas.  I can't stand their espresso.  But I'm spoiled.  At home I drink espresso made with 100% Jamaican Blue Mountain beans.  In fact, I just ordered three pounds today to replenish my dwindling supply.


Love the Jamaica Blue Mountain but too much $$$ for me for daily use.  Kenya AA has been good as well but for general use I rotate either a Moka Java, Sumatran, or Amalfi Coast.   For summer time, it is cold brew so I get nice ice-cold coffee goodness for my morning commute.

Starbucks coffee is pretty much bleh to me.  I find it too over-roasted. If I need to buy drip would much rather have Dunkin Donuts (ergo proving that I am not in fact a coffee snob, despite all appearances to the contrary).  For those who love spending a lot of cash for a heavily roasted product -- good on ya.

/yeah cold brew!
 
2013-06-22 01:18:57 AM  
Starbucks is good for people who travel because you just about always know what you're going to get and they are farking everywhere. Hitting other coffee places is a crap shoot. Sometimes they are great and sometimes they are shiat.
 
2013-06-22 01:29:25 AM  

brokenslide: OgreMagi: ....

I like their mochas.  I can't stand their espresso.  But I'm spoiled.  At home I drink espresso made with 100% Jamaican Blue Mountain beans.  In fact, I just ordered three pounds today to replenish my dwindling supply.

Love the Jamaica Blue Mountain but too much $$$ for me for daily use.  Kenya AA has been good as well but for general use I rotate either a Moka Java, Sumatran, or Amalfi Coast.   For summer time, it is cold brew so I get nice ice-cold coffee goodness for my morning commute.


The three pounds I ordered today cost $108 (shipping included).  Yes, that's pretty damn expensive when compared to the $10 crap I can get at the grocery store.  The difference is, I enjoy drinking the Jamaican.  It's my daily espresso and my major indulgence.

Starbucks coffee is pretty much bleh to me.  I find it too over-roasted. If I need to buy drip would much rather have Dunkin Donuts (ergo proving that I am not in fact a coffee snob, despite all appearances to the contrary).  For those who love spending a lot of cash for a heavily roasted product -- good on ya.

I agree, Starbucks is over roasted, a.k.a. burnt.  Which goes well with a mocha, but sucks for a regular cup of coffee.
 
2013-06-22 01:31:46 AM  

Errk: Starbucks is good for people who travel because you just about always know what you're going to get and they are farking everywhere. Hitting other coffee places is a crap shoot. Sometimes they are great and sometimes they are shiat.


I have to agree.  The last time I went to a mom & pop coffee place, the mocha was so bad I ended up tossing it.  Also, they charged more than Starbucks.
 
2013-06-22 01:32:07 AM  

Alleyoop: [www.killthehydra.com image 500x286]


Now I want to do that at the Starbletch that my wife's ex-husband's now current wife works at.  Not quite as confusing as Spaceballs but close enough
 
2013-06-22 01:38:27 AM  

Staffist: LZeitgeist: Staffist: My Starbucks name is Gunther.  It's rarely misspelled.

Is your last name Centralperk?

OK, so I hadn't made that connection until now...  I'll leave it up to you then.  Give me a new one.


Swarley.
 
2013-06-22 01:42:06 AM  
I don't know if this happens at other Starbucks but at my local one if it is late enough and they don't want to make huge amount of drip the barista will make you a pour-over style coffee that is very good. It does take a few minutes but it is excellent and the same price as the ordinary drip. The decaf has a nice, smooth taste with little bitterness.
 
2013-06-22 01:55:43 AM  

Bumblefark: Cerebral Infarktion: There are so many better drugs out there than caffeine

Yup, and 99% of them are illegal, since they don't promote workplace productivity.

Bottoms up, worker bees! Society commends your choice of beverage.


At first I thought it was just a little humorous, but after I thought about it.

Tobacco and Caffeine used to be tolerated, if not expressly permitted because they do lend to productivity.  Just stimulants enough to enhance, but no real crashes except for those people who have issues handling their coffee(IE get all hyper and loopy like children )

And alcohol, while not a good thing at work, has been used for centuries as a reward to the slaves, still is for a lot of laborers and other worker bees.  Go home, drink a 6 pack, sleep, get up, go to work.
 
2013-06-22 02:09:20 AM  
I hope they don't raise the price of handjobs
 
2013-06-22 02:09:45 AM  

thornhill: It's so much cheaper to buy premium beans from Stumptown or Blue Bottle and just make your own damn coffee.


So much farking THIS.  Also, your coffee won't taste like over-toasted cardboard, like Starbucks' dripped sh*t.
 
2013-06-22 02:11:36 AM  
I 3D print my own coffee.

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-22 02:12:03 AM  

Mr. Chainsaw: Doesn't sound like venti black iced coffees are going up in price, so I'm good.


And if they did you'd quit going over ten cents?  Whatever.
 
2013-06-22 02:17:37 AM  
there's 2 devices for 3D printing my stimulants in the morning.  Mr. Coffee, and Mr. Meth
it's a portable meth lab.  just add sudafed
 
2013-06-22 02:23:54 AM  

Fade2black: texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.

Worked for Starbucks for 3 years when I was 19.  When people laugh, I point out this was in the late 90s early 2000s when it was me, 1 other cool guy, and 11 hot women.  Couldn't ask for a better work environment in retail.

That being said, I was too young to enjoy coffee, so I drank hot chocolate (drinks are free for employees during the day)...it wasn't until I left that I was old enough to go back and physically want coffee.  Ironic I'm sure.

People rag on Starbucks way too much.  It takes are real moron to screw up coffee...most assume starbucks tastes bad because it's DIFFERENT...what they don't understand is they brew in a way that brings out the true nature of coffee.  The best way to get your flavor hands down from any brew though, is to use a French Press.  Metal/gold filters are the best way to go.  I'm rambling, but yeah...suck it haters, just because it's brewed differently doesn't mean it's bad...it means you don't want to admit you pay $2 for a cup of coffee just like the rest of us.


are you a wizard?

how did you stay 19 for 3 years?
 
2013-06-22 02:27:17 AM  

texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.


I drink coffee, and I also don't step into a Starbucks. For $4.00 a cup, it better have alcohol in it.
 
2013-06-22 02:28:24 AM  

omeganuepsilon: Bumblefark: Cerebral Infarktion: There are so many better drugs out there than caffeine

Yup, and 99% of them are illegal, since they don't promote workplace productivity.

Bottoms up, worker bees! Society commends your choice of beverage.

At first I thought it was just a little humorous, but after I thought about it.

Tobacco and Caffeine used to be tolerated, if not expressly permitted because they do lend to productivity.  Just stimulants enough to enhance, but no real crashes except for those people who have issues handling their coffee(IE get all hyper and loopy like children )

And alcohol, while not a good thing at work, has been used for centuries as a reward to the slaves, still is for a lot of laborers and other worker bees.  Go home, drink a 6 pack, sleep, get up, go to work.


Yup. In fact, plantation owners used to deliberately liquor-up their slaves to keep them from roaming off in the middle of the night, usually during holidays and other periods of prolonged downtime.

Just wait until the modern day establishment figures out that marijuana has the same wanderlust-killing properties as alcohol, with none of the hangover effects that might impair work performance the next day. I dare say, we might begin to see pot legalized...

/welp, off to grab another round of slave juice...
 
2013-06-22 02:33:11 AM  

Bumblefark: omeganuepsilon: Bumblefark: Cerebral Infarktion: There are so many better drugs out there than caffeine

Yup, and 99% of them are illegal, since they don't promote workplace productivity.

Bottoms up, worker bees! Society commends your choice of beverage.

At first I thought it was just a little humorous, but after I thought about it.

Tobacco and Caffeine used to be tolerated, if not expressly permitted because they do lend to productivity.  Just stimulants enough to enhance, but no real crashes except for those people who have issues handling their coffee(IE get all hyper and loopy like children )

And alcohol, while not a good thing at work, has been used for centuries as a reward to the slaves, still is for a lot of laborers and other worker bees.  Go home, drink a 6 pack, sleep, get up, go to work.

Yup. In fact, plantation owners used to deliberately liquor-up their slaves to keep them from roaming off in the middle of the night, usually during holidays and other periods of prolonged downtime.

Just wait until the modern day establishment figures out that marijuana has the same wanderlust-killing properties as alcohol, with none of the hangover effects that might impair work performance the next day. I dare say, we might begin to see pot legalized...

/welp, off to grab another round of slave juice...


wow it's almost like they CARED for the slaves.  and who said slavery wasn't fun
 
2013-06-22 02:34:46 AM  

SirEattonHogg: Starbucks is okay but Coffee Bean is where its at in SoCal.  I think it tastes a bit smoother.

Peets is a bit too strong for my taste.


They're all using the same beans and the same roasting techniques. What causes Starbucks coffee to be on the... "okay" side is that they buy coffee in HUGE bulk, roast it, then throw it in a warehouse for use over the next year or so. You can usually get the best cup of "Fancy" coffee from smaller shops that buy the coffee in smaller amounts for immediate usage. It's a smart move on the part of Starbucks, as they can sit pretty for the year when coffee bean prices go up, and just go through their safety stock while smaller shops have to crank up prices almost immediately.

Heck, I might say that the can of Folgers you buy at the grocery store is likely fresher than any Starbucks coffee.

There used to be a place where I grew up, called "Java n' Jazz", that was essentially an outlet for the Newhall Coffee Roasting Co. That was damn fine coffee.

Coffee Klatch in San Dimas is my fave now, although it's a bit of a hipster joint. It's A Grind, though a chain, also has good coffee.

As for the Canuckistanians... Tim Horton's is a friggin' donut shop, with coffee that doesn't taste any better than your average donut shop's drip coffee.
 
2013-06-22 02:35:36 AM  

LincolnLogolas: SirEattonHogg: Starbucks is okay but Coffee Bean is where its at in SoCal.  I think it tastes a bit smoother.

Peets is a bit too strong for my taste.

They're all using the same beans and the same roasting techniques. What causes Starbucks coffee to be on the... "okay" side is that they buy coffee in HUGE bulk, roast it, then throw it in a warehouse for use over the next year or so. You can usually get the best cup of "Fancy" coffee from smaller shops that buy the coffee in smaller amounts for immediate usage. It's a smart move on the part of Starbucks, as they can sit pretty for the year when coffee bean prices go up, and just go through their safety stock while smaller shops have to crank up prices almost immediately.

Heck, I might say that the can of Folgers you buy at the grocery store is likely fresher than any Starbucks coffee.

There used to be a place where I grew up, called "Java n' Jazz", that was essentially an outlet for the Newhall Coffee Roasting Co. That was damn fine coffee.

Coffee Klatch in San Dimas is my fave now, although it's a bit of a hipster joint. It's A Grind, though a chain, also has good coffee.

As for the Canuckistanians... Tim Horton's is a friggin' donut shop, with coffee that doesn't taste any better than your average donut shop's drip coffee.


it tastes cold.  like it was made in Canada.  unlike Mexican Foldgers
 
2013-06-22 02:35:58 AM  
I got tired of spelling my name out for them so I tell them my name is 'X'.

Once I got my drink back, and the guy had spelled it 'Ecks'.
 
2013-06-22 02:38:59 AM  

Bumblefark: Yup. In fact, plantation owners used to deliberately liquor-up their slaves to keep them from roaming off in the middle of the night, usually during holidays and other periods of prolonged downtime.


Goes back at least to Egypt
/Firefly, lol
 
2013-06-22 02:39:20 AM  

Bumblefark: omeganuepsilon: Bumblefark: Cerebral Infarktion: There are so many better drugs out there than caffeine

Yup, and 99% of them are illegal, since they don't promote workplace productivity.

Bottoms up, worker bees! Society commends your choice of beverage.

At first I thought it was just a little humorous, but after I thought about it.

Tobacco and Caffeine used to be tolerated, if not expressly permitted because they do lend to productivity.  Just stimulants enough to enhance, but no real crashes except for those people who have issues handling their coffee(IE get all hyper and loopy like children )

And alcohol, while not a good thing at work, has been used for centuries as a reward to the slaves, still is for a lot of laborers and other worker bees.  Go home, drink a 6 pack, sleep, get up, go to work.

Yup. In fact, plantation owners used to deliberately liquor-up their slaves to keep them from roaming off in the middle of the night, usually during holidays and other periods of prolonged downtime.

Just wait until the modern day establishment figures out that marijuana has the same wanderlust-killing properties as alcohol, with none of the hangover effects that might impair work performance the next day. I dare say, we might begin to see pot legalized...

/welp, off to grab another round of slave juice...


img.fark.net
 
2013-06-22 02:40:56 AM  
Circle K has awesome coffee and it's a buck if you bring your own refill cup up to 24 ounces. I walk in, lay a buck on the counter, get my coffee with cream and sugar, and walk out.

30 seconds in and out. I don't even turn my car off.

/small town life
 
2013-06-22 02:46:08 AM  
You suckers buying Starbucks when you can get great coffee from a local gas station. Pro tip: save a nickel by pouring from the day-old pot.
 
2013-06-22 02:47:22 AM  

The My Little Pony Killer: IDGAF how they spell my name, so long as I get whipped cream on my coffee/sugar drink.


We tend to take turns at my office doing Starbucks runs, so when it's my turn I come up with a new alias and order with a different bad accent. It's great to hear my coworkers say "Who the fark is Gottfried??!?"
 
2013-06-22 02:48:24 AM  

Justin Bieber's Acne Medication: You suckers buying Starbucks when you can get great coffee from a local gas station. Pro tip: save a nickel by pouring from the day-old pot.


why not just buy Straterra for your ADHD your not using the coffee recREATIONALLY ARE YOU.  CAUSE THATS ONE OF THE 8 DEADLY SINS
 
2013-06-22 02:49:52 AM  

Justin Bieber's Acne Medication: You suckers buying Starbucks when you can get great coffee from a local gas station. Pro tip: save a nickel by pouring from the day-old pot.


what's wrong with Keurig cups?  i don't think you can pay for hot coffee with food stamps
 
2013-06-22 03:10:21 AM  
When I'm on the road, Starbucks is a life saver.  When I'm home, I make my own.  Still, my local Starbucks is probably the best one I've ever been to.  The Clover is a big plus.
 
2013-06-22 03:20:38 AM  

LincolnLogolas: Bumblefark: omeganuepsilon: Bumblefark: Cerebral Infarktion: There are so many better drugs out there than caffeine

Yup, and 99% of them are illegal, since they don't promote workplace productivity.

Bottoms up, worker bees! Society commends your choice of beverage.

At first I thought it was just a little humorous, but after I thought about it.

Tobacco and Caffeine used to be tolerated, if not expressly permitted because they do lend to productivity.  Just stimulants enough to enhance, but no real crashes except for those people who have issues handling their coffee(IE get all hyper and loopy like children )

And alcohol, while not a good thing at work, has been used for centuries as a reward to the slaves, still is for a lot of laborers and other worker bees.  Go home, drink a 6 pack, sleep, get up, go to work.

Yup. In fact, plantation owners used to deliberately liquor-up their slaves to keep them from roaming off in the middle of the night, usually during holidays and other periods of prolonged downtime.

Just wait until the modern day establishment figures out that marijuana has the same wanderlust-killing properties as alcohol, with none of the hangover effects that might impair work performance the next day. I dare say, we might begin to see pot legalized...

/welp, off to grab another round of slave juice...

[img.fark.net image 500x375]


Meh. Can't be any worse than what I'm sipping on.

/mmm, tastes like servitude...
 
2013-06-22 03:21:02 AM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Circle K has awesome coffee and it's a buck if you bring your own refill cup up to 24 ounces. I walk in, lay a buck on the counter, get my coffee with cream and sugar, and walk out.

30 seconds in and out. I don't even turn my car off.

/small town life


Circle K is alright, if you don't mind the strange things afoot at the Circle K.
 
2013-06-22 03:34:29 AM  
Phase 1: Make idiots believe Starbucks coffee is worth the ridiculous prices they charge
Phase 2: Raise those ridiculous prices 10 cents
Phase 3: Profit

/tea drinker, not a coffee drinker
//wonders why coffee is so popular
 
2013-06-22 03:36:05 AM  

FatherChaos: Phase 1: Make idiots believe Starbucks coffee is worth the ridiculous prices they charge
Phase 2: Raise those ridiculous prices 10 cents
Phase 3: Profit

/tea drinker, not a coffee drinker
//wonders why coffee is so popular


Because tea is farking unpalatable no matter what you add (or don't) to it.

/drinks neither, so no particular dog in this fight.
 
2013-06-22 03:55:24 AM  

LincolnLogolas: ecmoRandomNumbers: Circle K has awesome coffee and it's a buck if you bring your own refill cup up to 24 ounces. I walk in, lay a buck on the counter, get my coffee with cream and sugar, and walk out.

30 seconds in and out. I don't even turn my car off.

/small town life

Circle K is alright, if you don't mind the strange things afoot at the Circle K.


Where else are you going to get meth at 3am on a week night?
 
2013-06-22 04:05:49 AM  
I'll admit going to Starbucks. But I live in SoCal, where the mom and pop coffee shops, even the street carts, are more expensive with less options. And at both the Starbucks next to my office and the one closest to my house, the baristas actually remember my name and say hi to me as I'm walking into the shop. And they draw hearts around my name. I can't say that for any hipster place I've ever been to.

/when I have time to lounge at home, I brew my own using Peet's Major Dickason
 
2013-06-22 04:42:33 AM  
I remember the first time I went to Starbucks. I ordered a Mocha, and was expecting well, regular coffee made with Mocha beans (as far as I knew back then Mocha is just a kind of bean from Yemen, known for a hint of chocolate in its taste), and instead they give me this sweet hot chocolate kind of drink. The server had no idea what was complaining about.
 
2013-06-22 05:37:35 AM  
Ive only been to starbucks once. It was years ago and they got all pissy when i ordered a "large."
 
2013-06-22 05:43:37 AM  

dwade: Ive only been to starbucks once. It was years ago and they got all pissy when i ordered a "large."


I like doing that.  Saying "venti" is just too pretentious.
 
2013-06-22 06:01:29 AM  
I [do/don't] drink Starbucks coffee because I'm better than you.
 
2013-06-22 06:30:20 AM  
If you keep buying my $4 coffee, I'll charge you $5.
 
2013-06-22 06:50:47 AM  
I always thought Starbucks was too dark for me, then they came out with a lighter roast and I'll occasional get my morning cup there. I prefer a lighter roast not just for the taste, but its also got more caffeine in it. Grande black coffee is only $2 here, aboot the same as Tim Hortons. I might have to look elsewhere if it goes up though.
 
2013-06-22 06:53:21 AM  

Staffist: LZeitgeist: Staffist: My Starbucks name is Gunther.  It's rarely misspelled.

Is your last name Centralperk?

OK, so I hadn't made that connection until now...  I'll leave it up to you then.  Give me a new one.


No need for a new one - I think it's great. Wasn't ragging on you; was tossing out an obscure bit of trivia to see if your choice was purposeful or accidental.

\'...don't go changin'
\\ to try to please me...'
\\\
 
2013-06-22 07:10:47 AM  

Fun Dumpster: I hope they don't raise the price of handjobs


img.fark.net
 
2013-06-22 07:50:21 AM  
I don't understand all this pretentious chatter about buying coffee. You're buying your own coffee. You're a plebe.
 
2013-06-22 07:55:25 AM  

People_are_Idiots: texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.

I drink coffee, and I also don't step into a Starbucks. For $4.00 a cup, it better have alcohol in it.


And you are people.  It's not a $4 cup of coffee.  It's about $1.50 for a cup of coffee.  Don't confuse a mixed beverage with multiple ingredients with a cup of coffee.

But you can keep being a douche about it, sure.
 
2013-06-22 08:13:10 AM  

OgreMagi: Supply and demand.  If people will keep paying for their drinks, then they would be fools to not raise their prices.

I like their mochas.  I can't stand their espresso.  But I'm spoiled.  At home I drink espresso made with 100% Jamaican Blue Mountain beans.  In fact, I just ordered three pounds today to replenish my dwindling supply.


I've said it before, I'll say it again: their espresso taste like an armpit.
 
2013-06-22 08:13:17 AM  

blacksharpiemarker: I work within the coffee industry, and it's no secret that Starbucks serves some of the lowest grade bean blends available. I can't believe there's so many people that actually appreciate what they serve as "premium" coffee.

Enjoy your price increase, idiots.

/You wouldn't know a proper coffee from wet water out of a shoe...


But are you getting a kick out of these replies?
 
2013-06-22 08:17:38 AM  

Staffist: My Starbucks name is Gunther.  It's rarely misspelled.


img.fark.net
 
2013-06-22 08:19:48 AM  
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-06-22 08:28:55 AM  
Seven years (average) liberal arts education and they can't even spell correctly?
 
2013-06-22 08:36:58 AM  

WhippingBoy: Seven years (average) liberal arts education and they can't even spell correctly?


i thought liberal arts = sex education
 
2013-06-22 08:37:19 AM  
Is Starbucks still a thing?
 
2013-06-22 08:44:34 AM  

Bslim: Is Starbucks still a thing?


no
 
2013-06-22 08:48:39 AM  

Jon iz teh kewl: WhippingBoy: Seven years (average) liberal arts education and they can't even spell correctly?

i thought liberal arts = sex education


That's marital arts, a much more challenging degree than English Lit.
 
2013-06-22 08:50:11 AM  

blacksharpiemarker: I work within the coffee industry, and it's no secret that Starbucks serves some of the lowest grade bean blends available. I can't believe there's so many people that actually appreciate what they serve as "premium" coffee.


People(or at least I) go to starbucks if I want caffeine and am not familiar with the other options in the area...McDonalds works for that too. Especially if I'm driving long distance and want a giant cup of coffee - quantity over quality - at smaller shops(if you can even find them while on the road) you might get a tiny cup of coffee for the same price.

Also your typical Starbucks regular is probably getting one of the sugar bomb drinks and the better quality beans would be wasted on those.
 
2013-06-22 08:52:27 AM  

WhippingBoy: Jon iz teh kewl: WhippingBoy: Seven years (average) liberal arts education and they can't even spell correctly?

i thought liberal arts = sex education

That's marital arts, a much more challenging degree than English Lit.


great now i have images of people in karate costumes having sex with each other
 
2013-06-22 09:16:16 AM  

Jon iz teh kewl: WhippingBoy: Jon iz teh kewl: WhippingBoy: Seven years (average) liberal arts education and they can't even spell correctly?

i thought liberal arts = sex education

That's marital arts, a much more challenging degree than English Lit.

great now i have images of people in karate costumes having sex with each other


Gi, what a weirdo.
 
2013-06-22 10:37:53 AM  
You haven't experienced a quality cup of coffee until you do it this way:

img.fark.net

+

img.fark.net

+

img.fark.net

You'll never do buy Starbucks again.


(Blue Bottle, Oslo and Grumpy all have excellent beans too).
 
2013-06-22 11:33:15 AM  
Wow - I can't say I've never been to Starbucks, but who the fark cares if they misspell your name?

A couple of weeks ago I placed a call to a Chinese restaurant to order takeout.  They misunderstood me when I told them my name.  I thought about correcting them for about 1/10th of a second and then said fark it.  They'll have my order ready when I get there and sure enough they did.   They didn't even call me by my name or the mistaken name they wrote down on the order.  They said, "Oh, you have the Beef Fried Rice and shiat?" and I said yes and all was good.

The Chinese restaurant doesn't give a shiat what my name is and Starbucks gives less of a shiat than that.  They just want you to pay for your order and all I want to do is get what I ordered.  Starbucks could call me Mary the Fairy for all I care as long as I get my coffee.
 
2013-06-22 11:41:05 AM  

Voiceofreason01: If all you want is a regular cup of black coffee Starbucks is excellent and has pretty reasonable prices


Wrong.  I tried some black coffee from Starbucks recently.  It was awful as well as more expensive than other places I get better coffee from.  Do you work for Starbucks?
 
2013-06-22 11:44:51 AM  
Won't someone think of those poor, widddle SHAREHOLDERS?
 
2013-06-22 01:18:19 PM  

GBB: Just get the home version, Verismo.


Works for me. I'm a cheap bastid when it comes to coffee. I want a pick-me-up, not a dessert for breakfast with birds, hearts or some other shiat drawn with the foam. $10 can of Folgers or chock full o nuts will last me a month with use daily and I'm perfectly happy.
 
2013-06-22 03:26:10 PM  
I love how the article talks about the price of coffee beans as a factor of drinks that are mostly milk or other ingredients. Here's a hint: the espresso part of the drinks is a small fraction of the price. I have an espresso machine at home, and quick and dirty math points to about 10 or 15 cents per shot. Coffee shops have the economy of scale working in their favor, so they pay less. The biggest drive behind this increase is MILK. Farking cow juice is skyrocketing in price faster than gasoline.

Dear coffee shops: instead of raising your prices, try to reduce the amount of milk you waste. I know it will be difficult, but I believe in you.

/worked at a Starbucks
//all of the shops waste milk like oversized, land-yacht SUVs waste gas
///STOP IT, ARSEHOLES
 
2013-06-22 04:06:00 PM  

Alexei Novikov: I love how the article talks about the price of coffee beans as a factor of drinks that are mostly milk or other ingredients. Here's a hint: the espresso part of the drinks is a small fraction of the price. I have an espresso machine at home, and quick and dirty math points to about 10 or 15 cents per shot. Coffee shops have the economy of scale working in their favor, so they pay less. The biggest drive behind this increase is MILK. Farking cow juice is skyrocketing in price faster than gasoline.

Dear coffee shops: instead of raising your prices, try to reduce the amount of milk you waste. I know it will be difficult, but I believe in you.

/worked at a Starbucks
//all of the shops waste milk like oversized, land-yacht SUVs waste gas
///STOP IT, ARSEHOLES


They charge for convenience.  I like my coffee black - no cream, no sugar, no nothing except coffee.  I've never calculated the price, but even buying the expensive beans the cost of brewing at home doesn't come close to even 7-11 prices for a cup of coffee.

I never understood why people sit 12-deep in a drive through window at Starbucks and I'm lazy.  I say I don't have time to make myself breakfast before I go to work even though it really only takes a few minutes to fry an egg and even less to make toast and even less to pour milk over a bowl of Cheerios, but somehow I always manage to make coffee..
 
2013-06-22 04:07:53 PM  

texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.


I don't either but they have amazing iced tea and good hot chocolate in the winter. If I'm in need of a breakfast sandwich their selection is far superior to what I could get at McD's or places like it.

/ of course all that stuff is pricey
 
2013-06-22 04:11:13 PM  

FatherChaos: Phase 1: Make idiots believe Starbucks coffee is worth the ridiculous prices they charge
Phase 2: Raise those ridiculous prices 10 cents
Phase 3: Profit

/tea drinker, not a coffee drinker
//wonders why coffee is so popular


aren't you fancy
 
2013-06-22 04:21:19 PM  
I love Starbucks Komodo Dragon beans. Motherfarkers for some reason stopped selling them in this country and only carry the decaf version. Which is delicious, but decaf? What's the point?!?
 
2013-06-23 03:22:36 AM  

rikkitikkitavi: People_are_Idiots: texdent: I have never once stepped into a Starbucks. Course I also don't drink coffee.

I drink coffee, and I also don't step into a Starbucks. For $4.00 a cup, it better have alcohol in it.

And you are people.  It's not a $4 cup of coffee.  It's about $1.50 for a cup of coffee.  Don't confuse a mixed beverage with multiple ingredients with a cup of coffee.

But you can keep being a douche about it, sure.


Hmm, mind reading that again? Did I mention $4 coffee? I said for $4 a cup, it better have alcohol. aka irish coffee.

/best coffee I have had cost .50 for a 16 oz.
 
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