If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(io9)   If this is the first message we try to send to alien life, God help us   (io9.com) divider line 48
    More: Amusing, gods, aliens  
•       •       •

5696 clicks; posted to Geek » on 20 Jun 2013 at 1:21 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



48 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-06-20 01:08:18 PM
img.fark.net

DERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP...
 
2013-06-20 01:23:32 PM
The only possible good outcome from this would be if an alien civilization picks up this message, flies all the way here to meet us, and then stands around on the White House lawn picking their ear wax in a confused attempt to say hello.
 
2013-06-20 01:28:51 PM
Proving the Guide correct:  Mostly Harmless.
 
2013-06-20 01:30:40 PM
WHY?!

"It was chosen by Germany-based conceptual artist..."

Oh for farks sake! Really?
 
2013-06-20 01:31:20 PM
So now aliens will think we just change the color of out faces whenever we feel like it.................
 
2013-06-20 01:32:39 PM
SEND MORE CHUCK BERRY.
 
2013-06-20 01:36:04 PM

Telos: Proving the Guide correct:  Mostly Harmless.


No, I'm pretty sure the first edition had it right.
 
2013-06-20 01:36:55 PM

toraque: The only possible good outcome from this would be if an alien civilization picks up this message, flies all the way here to meet us, and then stands around on the White House lawn picking their ear wax in a confused attempt to say hello.


"Oh Great Leadiatrix of the Seventh Moon of Florn (whose pustules are ever fragrant), we have analyzed the communique from Erf. It appears the apebeasts of that world are troubled by blockages in their aural canals. Now is the time to strike!"

"Excellent. Ready the Waxy Yellow Buildup Ray!"
 
2013-06-20 01:40:18 PM

Wade_Wilson: toraque: The only possible good outcome from this would be if an alien civilization picks up this message, flies all the way here to meet us, and then stands around on the White House lawn picking their ear wax in a confused attempt to say hello.

"Oh Great Leadiatrix of the Seventh Moon of Florn (whose pustules are ever fragrant), we have analyzed the communique from Erf. It appears the apebeasts of that world are troubled by blockages in their aural canals. Now is the time to strike!"

"Excellent. Ready the Waxy Yellow Buildup Ray!"



WOuldn't mind the plans for that:

img.fark.net

But would rename it he Waxy Yellow Buildup Ray-Inator!

See, it's not the same because it has "Inator" at the end.
 
2013-06-20 01:40:45 PM
Lucky for us, the content of the message is inconsequential. If there is an intelligence there to hear the message then they won't likely make sense of an animated gif or much else in the message. The fact that it is an artificial signal is all that will really matter.
 
2013-06-20 01:41:54 PM
Alternative suggestions, anyone?

Too big to embed
 
2013-06-20 01:44:48 PM
The baby otter tickle .gif would have been far superior.  Or pictures of Grumpy Cat.
 
2013-06-20 01:51:24 PM

babtras: Lucky for us, the content of the message is inconsequential. If there is an intelligence there to hear the message then they won't likely make sense of an animated gif or much else in the message. The fact that it is an artificial signal is all that will really matter.


We've been sending out artificial signals for quite a while now.
hitlertriumphant.files.wordpress.com
/1936 Olympics
 
2013-06-20 01:58:06 PM

PizzaJedi81: Wade_Wilson: toraque: The only possible good outcome from this would be if an alien civilization picks up this message, flies all the way here to meet us, and then stands around on the White House lawn picking their ear wax in a confused attempt to say hello.

"Oh Great Leadiatrix of the Seventh Moon of Florn (whose pustules are ever fragrant), we have analyzed the communique from Erf. It appears the apebeasts of that world are troubled by blockages in their aural canals. Now is the time to strike!"

"Excellent. Ready the Waxy Yellow Buildup Ray!"


WOuldn't mind the plans for that:

[img.fark.net image 435x473]

But would rename it he Waxy Yellow Buildup Ray-Inator!

See, it's not the same because it has "Inator" at the end.


I read all of that in Doofenshmirtz's voice.....
 
2013-06-20 02:19:05 PM
This is like getting upset at which font you use to write your message on a grain of sand and then cast into the Pacific Ocean.
 
2013-06-20 02:19:20 PM
 
2013-06-20 02:19:45 PM

I Ate Shergar: Alternative suggestions, anyone?

Too big to embed


What the HELL is this from?!

/I mean, obviously STTNG, but what just happened?
 
2013-06-20 02:21:06 PM
Just wait til those ET aliens get my screen grabs from Chatroulette...
 
2013-06-20 02:22:01 PM

I Ate Shergar: Alternative suggestions, anyone?

Too big to embed


Omg.  Awesome.
 
2013-06-20 02:25:49 PM
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-06-20 02:36:58 PM
I believe this one:

img.fark.net

would have been a much better choice
 
2013-06-20 02:38:32 PM

JohnAnnArbor: [upload.wikimedia.org image 200x600]


Galactus is sending Firelord to Earth to boil the seas and burn the trees?
 
2013-06-20 02:45:06 PM

JohnAnnArbor:


It totally sucked when you fell off the mesa only for the tsetse flies to stun you and then the thief killed you. All because your stupid kid brother accidently turned off the grappling hook.
 
2013-06-20 02:45:54 PM
How would aliens decode & view a GIF?

/semi-serious question
 
2013-06-20 02:46:06 PM

SirTanon: I believe this one:

[img.fark.net image 200x231]

would have been a much better choice


I...need a few minutes.
 
2013-06-20 02:46:09 PM

I Ate Shergar: Alternative suggestions, anyone?

Too big to embed


I've just watched Sir Patrick Stewart do his best impression of a 10 year old kid.

It was oddly awesome.
 
2013-06-20 02:49:08 PM

PizzaJedi81: SirTanon: I believe this one:

[img.fark.net image 200x231]

would have been a much better choice

I...need a few minutes.


Since you enjoyed it so much.. here's another excellent candidate.

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 02:49:46 PM

SirTanon: PizzaJedi81: SirTanon: I believe this one:

[img.fark.net image 200x231]

would have been a much better choice

I...need a few minutes.

Since you enjoyed it so much.. here's another excellent candidate.

[img.fark.net image 240x300]


I'd send her into space, if ya know what I mean, and I think you do.
 
2013-06-20 02:51:28 PM

SGT Ace: How would aliens decode & view a GIF?

/semi-serious question


By paying 1.50$ to Unisys?
 
2013-06-20 03:12:05 PM
img.fark.net
Ignignokt: Hello, Carl, I am Ignignokt and this is Err.
Err: I am Err.
Ignignokt: We are Mooninites from the inner core of the moon.
Err: You said it right.
Ignignokt: Our race is hundreds of years beyond yours.
Err: Man, you hear what he's saying?
Ignignokt: Some would say that the Earth is our moon.
Err: We're the moon.
Ignignokt: But that would belittle the name of our moon, which is: The Moon.
Err: Point is: we're at the center, not you.
Carl: No, the real point is: I don't give a damn.
 
2013-06-20 03:31:34 PM
At least they didn't pick that one with a goat...
 
2013-06-20 03:34:21 PM
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 03:41:16 PM
Eh, it kinda suits our devotion to banal minutae.
 
2013-06-20 03:45:56 PM
This one would also be suitable

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 04:24:36 PM
Going the other way around, some guy once subtitled that scene in Close Encounters Of The Third Kind, wherein the scientists attempt to communicate with the alien mothership.

Know that ONE scientist in the crowd that goes "Great, but what are we SAYING?"

He was right to be concerned...  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oU_BBIUTVdg

/"[[We could simulate]] the sounds, but not the language.  We would be responding in gibberish."  --Spock states the obvious, Star Trek IV
 
2013-06-20 04:24:40 PM
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 04:34:32 PM
Don't worry. That .gif won't be the first to reach the aliens. There was a similar event about 5 years ago, and my contribution to the project was Monty Python's "Galaxy Song" in .mp3 format.

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 04:42:49 PM
JohnAnnArbor:
img.fark.net

What the aliens think humans look like:
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 04:43:27 PM

Ego edo infantia cattus: WHY?!

"It was chosen by Germany-based conceptual artist..."

Oh for farks sake! Really?


Considering the source, I'm surprised it wasn't more scatological.
 
2013-06-20 04:57:41 PM

Fano: JohnAnnArbor:

It totally sucked when you fell off the mesa only for the tsetse flies to stun you and then the thief killed you. All because your stupid kid brother accidently turned off the grappling hook.


Ffffuuuu... I hate you for making me remember that game.

img.fark.net

Had a 50/50 chance of hitting that goddamn branch right every time.
 
2013-06-20 05:13:42 PM

TV's Vinnie: JohnAnnArbor:


What the aliens think humans look like:


Ultros giving a facial to an indian who had his head explode, receiving bukkake to the neck stump and voiding his bladder at the same time? Even T & P aren't that raunchy.
 
2013-06-20 05:15:07 PM

SirTanon: This one would also be suitable

[img.fark.net image 268x156]


Not saying there's anything wrong with it, but wasn't it later found to be a viral marketing campaign for that wiiFit?
 
2013-06-20 05:33:53 PM
The reason General Zod wanted to wipe out life on Earth is because the first transmission he saw when he got here was Kansas football.
 
2013-06-20 07:14:58 PM

zulius: SirTanon: This one would also be suitable

[img.fark.net image 268x156]

Not saying there's anything wrong with it, but wasn't it later found to be a viral marketing campaign for that wiiFit?


I don't know. I tried to read a bunch of news articles about it but they all included the image, and I didn't see any words on the page.
 
2013-06-20 08:03:48 PM
I read somewhere that observations of light and other EMR from distant galaxies may have a quantum effect, which alters the source of the light instantly or in the past. Simply put, by observing it, we are changing it - and by changing it, our inferences about the source of the light is incorrect, especially if somehow this has a causal effect through time.

Is this true? I mean, could we simply send a message, and determine that it has been observed by waiting for a corresponding quanum effect to occur on our end? Or did I read a really stupid article by a really stupid person? I attemped to find a citation but a google search only wants me to put photons into my 401k or learn how local mom discovered how to whiten her teeth with quanta.

However I binged "observing the universe changes it" and came up with http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Observer_effect_(physics) , Observation shorten's the life of the universe , and I guess that talks about (though tries to debunk) what I *think* I am talking about.
 
2013-06-20 10:19:58 PM
" Germany-based conceptual artist Kim Asendorf"

This twatwaffle's idea of art is to create a webpage with some bare text uttering profanity.

Gimme a farking break. If you don't paint, draw, sculpt, photograph--hell, or even interpretive dance for fark's sake, just as long as you're actually doing something tangible--you're not an artist.
 
2013-06-21 01:22:09 AM
As my final nomination for an alternative GIF to be sent into space.. I'd like to nominate

this
 
2013-06-21 02:14:25 PM

Ishidan: Going the other way around, some guy once subtitled that scene in Close Encounters Of The Third Kind, wherein the scientists attempt to communicate with the alien mothership.

Know that ONE scientist in the crowd that goes "Great, but what are we SAYING?"

He was right to be concerned...  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oU_BBIUTVdg

/"[[We could simulate]] the sounds, but not the language.  We would be responding in gibberish."  --Spock states the obvious, Star Trek IV


Of course, even just responding to a language, even if we respond in gibberish, is a sign that we are intelligent and should not be anally probed.
 
Displayed 48 of 48 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report