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(Stylist)   Sam Taylor-Johnson is set to direct the Fifty Shades of Grey movie. So, she won't be the only Johnson flying around the set   (stylist.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Cool, Bret Easton Ellis, Michael De Luca  
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972 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 20 Jun 2013 at 10:30 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



33 Comments   (+0 »)
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2013-06-20 09:19:21 AM  
I still don't understand the appeal of this book.
 
2013-06-20 09:54:22 AM  
I haven't read th entire, but from the excerpts I've read online it appears to be very graphic.  Are they going to water it down for an R rating or could this be the film that finally makes an NC-17 movie successful?
 
2013-06-20 10:13:21 AM  

TuteTibiImperes: I haven't read th entire, but from the excerpts I've read online it appears to be very graphic.  Are they going to water it down for an R rating or could this be the film that finally makes an NC-17 movie successful?


R? You're being optimistic.  Some studio exec somewhere has made it his life's mission to get it down to PG-13.  He might actually succeed, too.
 
2013-06-20 10:14:43 AM  
That book is for actual retards.
 
2013-06-20 10:25:23 AM  

TuteTibiImperes: I haven't read the entire book, but from the excerpts I've read online it appears to be very graphic.  Are they going to water it down for an R rating or could this be the film that finally makes an NC-17 movie successful?


Wow, editing fail, FTFM
 
2013-06-20 10:36:47 AM  
I just dread the aftermath of this

because why does this make me think walmart could start a fetish ish line after this damn movie takes off

and now i want to scrub my mind for thinking of that, and what that may look like

/help me
 
2013-06-20 10:37:35 AM  
I was dragged to a parody play about it. I was one of 20 men in an audience of about 3000. From whay I could tell it looks like it appeals to middle age and older women who secretly want some butt action.
 
2013-06-20 10:43:06 AM  

Weaver95: I still don't understand the appeal of this book.


Schlicking material for middle-aged soccer moms in flyover country.
 
2013-06-20 10:43:14 AM  

FriarReb98: R? You're being optimistic. Some studio exec somewhere has made it his life's mission to get it down to PG-13. He might actually succeed, too.


Which would be a tragedy if Mila Kunis is starring.

Speaking of, can we make this a Mila Kunis picture thread? Please?
 
2013-06-20 10:43:26 AM  

loonatic112358: I just dread the aftermath of this

because why does this make me think walmart could start a fetish ish line after this damn movie takes off

and now i want to scrub my mind for thinking of that, and what that may look like

/help me


Don't know if it's still there, but for anyone familiar with JR's along I-95 in North Carolina, there used to be a lingerie store in the attached plaza that had child sizes.  So not only did it exist, but it went full Pedobear besides.
 
2013-06-20 10:46:13 AM  
Will this be in 3D? So it could suck in another dimension?
 
2013-06-20 11:03:05 AM  
The XXX parody movie will make more money
 
2013-06-20 12:21:51 PM  
/oblig

"The mixture of sewer trout and magician's wax in my brown mile created the delicious sphincter sauce that he was so fond of. The hammering of my marmite motorway was so vigorous, he soon found his clock weights joining his purple beaver buster deep in my fudge factory. With his timed slimer farking deep into my split peach, the sensation of his huge penis smashing my cervix made me quake like Micheal J. Fox licking a car battery. My mouth was so full of Vince cable and creamy load, the ectoplasm was slobbering down my chin and onto my mosquito bites. The feeling of his magician's wax dripping down my throat got my shrimp sap flowing quicker than greased shiat off a shiny shovel."
 
2013-06-20 12:23:12 PM  
img.fark.net

You know how I know she has money?
 
2013-06-20 12:24:24 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: [img.fark.net image 801x1222]

You know how I know she has money?


The clutch, right?
 
2013-06-20 12:32:26 PM  

PizzaJedi81: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: [img.fark.net image 801x1222]

You know how I know she has money?

The clutch, right?


That and her shoes. Just to die for.
 
2013-06-20 12:36:39 PM  

Nana's Vibrator: The XXX parody movie will make more money


They killed that because you can't do a porn parody of a porn.
 
2013-06-20 12:40:29 PM  

meanmutton: Nana's Vibrator: The XXX parody movie will make more money

They killed that because you can't do a porn parody of a porn.


img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 01:23:40 PM  

Frank N Stein: That book is for actual retards.


Well, it is Twilight fanfiction with the serial numbers filed off, so you be the judge.

Okay, I'll make it easy.  It's a cardboard shiat sandwich and not even good 'mainstream' lit porn and it has terrible, inaccurate, often harmful and stupidly dangerous things to say about SM and kink.  But then, being a rip off of a terrible farking romance about a creepy farking immortal pedo stalker, maybe that's an improvement.
 
2013-06-20 01:26:23 PM  

Charlie Chingas: meanmutton: Nana's Vibrator: The XXX parody movie will make more money

They killed that because you can't do a porn parody of a porn.

[img.fark.net image 220x157]


No, actually, that's really what happeend:

http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2013/03/fifty-shades-of-grey-porn-parody -l awsuit-nightmare-is-finally-over

Smash Pictures, who does all the "Blah-blah-blah, a porn parody" movies tried to do one.  Universal said... umm, you can't do a porn parody of a porn.  They sued them.  They came to an agreement that Smash had to pay an undisclosed amount of money to Universal and couldn't put out the movie.
 
2013-06-20 01:35:15 PM  
thanks Obama?

man, what has this world come to when you a porn parody or a porn parody...

porn
 
2013-06-20 01:44:27 PM  
Will it be the first porn movie with a plot?
 
2013-06-20 01:45:54 PM  

TheGreatGazoo: Will it be the first porn movie with a plot?


From what I hear of the books...nope.
 
2013-06-20 01:47:34 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: [img.fark.net image 801x1222]

You know how I know she has money?


Cougar director marries young stud actor 23 years her junior whom she directed as young John Lennon in  Nowhere Boy(great movie, BTW).
 
2013-06-20 01:56:28 PM  

meanmutton: Charlie Chingas: meanmutton:

Smash Pictures, who does all the "Blah-blah-blah, a porn parody" movies tried to do one.  Universal said... umm, you can't do a porn parody of a porn.  They sued them.  They came to an agreement that Smash had to pay an undisclosed amount of money to Universal and couldn't put out the movie.



That was all news to me - but there IS still hope.  Per the link:


...this wasn't a parody at all. Smash Pictures was just trying to make their own version of Fifty Shades - with all of the glorious nudity and hardcore bondage, of course - while hiding behind the unoriginal-yet-popular XXX parody title. That, of course, pissed Universal off, what with all of that coin they shelled out.

So perhaps a true parody that would "comment on, criticize, or ridicule the original" could be made.  Either way, if I can't see it for free, I'm not seeing it, and quite frankly, the Fifty Shades storyline doesn't interest me at all.  Ahh, I'm bored with myself.  What's on the radio

/♩ ♪ ♫ I Love a Rainy Night ♩ ♪ ♫
 
2013-06-20 02:51:59 PM  
"old soul" lulz.
 
2013-06-20 03:07:48 PM  

Charlie Chingas: /oblig

"The mixture of sewer trout and magician's wax in my brown mile created the delicious sphincter sauce that he was so fond of. The hammering of my marmite motorway was so vigorous, he soon found his clock weights joining his purple beaver buster deep in my fudge factory. With his timed slimer farking deep into my split peach, the sensation of his huge penis smashing my cervix made me quake like Micheal J. Fox licking a car battery. My mouth was so full of Vince cable and creamy load, the ectoplasm was slobbering down my chin and onto my mosquito bites. The feeling of his magician's wax dripping down my throat got my shrimp sap flowing quicker than greased shiat off a shiny shovel."


You said "magician's wax" twice.
 
2013-06-20 03:11:24 PM  

Anderson's Pooper: You said "magician's wax" twice.


He likes magician's wax.
 
2013-06-20 03:56:25 PM  

FriarReb98: TuteTibiImperes: I haven't read th entire, but from the excerpts I've read online it appears to be very graphic.  Are they going to water it down for an R rating or could this be the film that finally makes an NC-17 movie successful?

R? You're being optimistic.  Some studio exec somewhere has made it his life's mission to get it down to PG-13.  He might actually succeed, too.


Think of what happened to 9 1/2 weeksit's a book about a woman;s first S&M relationship made into a movie that features exactly one smack of a riding crop upon Kim Bassinger's thigh as the sum total of the sexual violence depicted, and was directed by Gary farking Marshall

or for the hell of it..Exit to Eden   which someone (looking at YOU again, Gary) though needed the addition of a wacky jewel theft subplot and Rosie gorram O'Donnell in a farking leather teddy.

of farking course they are going to try to make it PG-13 before they are done.

Though I was amused to see that they man who had been offered the lead just turned them down-not because fo the nudity and sex (he was in the series  Hung where he played a male prostitute after all) but just because he read the book and felt the writing sucked too much for him to be in  a movie made from it.
 
2013-06-20 04:28:14 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: [img.fark.net image 801x1222]

You know how I know she has money?


i think he's suicidal, no belt and no shoelaces
 
2013-06-20 04:34:36 PM  
Abe Vigoda's Ghost
You know how I know she has money?


Good thing there's a beard or it would've been difficult to tell which one "she" refers to.
 
2013-06-20 04:37:20 PM  
TheraTx
i think he's suicidal, no belt and no shoelaces


Same goes for her, except she could do a Samurai move and fall onto her heels.
 
2013-06-20 04:43:58 PM  
mmmmmmm, porno for women who are too sexually repressed to just watch some porno.
 
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