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(Western Gazette (UK))   Woman burns stepladder in act of revenge after it stabs her. That'll teach it   (westerngazette.co.uk) divider line 38
    More: Strange, Mrs. Robinson, Yeovil, stab wound, grandmother, lights  
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3166 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Jun 2013 at 10:42 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-06-20 09:19:04 AM  
It's a witch! Buuuurn it!
 
2013-06-20 09:43:19 AM  
Who among us hasn't hit their head on an open cabinet door and slammed it closed in fury?
 
2013-06-20 09:56:39 AM  
I can't be the only one who has committed acts of violence upon inanimate objects that scorned me.
 
2013-06-20 10:36:40 AM  
Yeovil town crier, Bruce Trigger helped rescue Mrs Robinson.

DO-do-Do-DO-do-do-do
 
2013-06-20 10:38:35 AM  

Sybarite: Yeovil town crier, Bruce Trigger helped rescue Mrs Robinson.

DO-do-Do-DO-do-do-do


static.guim.co.uk
 
2013-06-20 10:47:23 AM  
ya know.. there is a reason MODERN stepladders have a note saying DONT STEP ON TOP STEP.
 
2013-06-20 10:51:08 AM  

kvinesknows: ya know.. there is a reason MODERN stepladders have a note saying DONT STEP ON TOP STEP.


Or she stepped on that little shelf designed to hold a paint can.  Darwin shoots and doesn't score.
 
2013-06-20 10:56:53 AM  
twentytwowords.com linked hotly
 
2013-06-20 10:58:25 AM  
Furniture violence is one of the underreported plagues of our time. I am the survivor of an assault by a park bench that left me with a bone bruise that took two and a half months to heal. Other Farkers have reported similar stories. We otto bring this story to light, man!
 
2013-06-20 11:02:37 AM  
Heh, that's nothing. My friends and I killed a Ford Pinto and left it steaming in a ditch in 1980.
 
2013-06-20 11:03:14 AM  

Nogale: Furniture violence is one of the underreported plagues of our time. I am the survivor of an assault by a park bench that left me with a bone bruise that took two and a half months to heal. Other Farkers have reported similar stories. We otto bring this story to light, man!


You got that right...

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 11:09:06 AM  
artisanelectric.net
 
2013-06-20 11:12:25 AM  

Stephen_Falken: Heh, that's nothing. My friends and I killed a Ford Pinto and left it steaming in a ditch in 1980.


True story about a Ford Pinto...

My buddy and I were on our way to the midnight movies.  There is one particularly bad curve you have to take along the way.  So if you're not familiar with the road, you will deffinitely spin out, and likely flip your car.

So, there is this upside down Ford Pinto about 20 yards off the road.  And two dudes are sitting there doing whippits (nitrous oxide).  So, we gave them a ride.  And of course we had to laugh at them for their misfortune.  Only because the car didn't explode, as they are prone to do.
 
2013-06-20 11:21:44 AM  

solokumba: [artisanelectric.net image 400x300]


Hahaha! I haven't seen that picture in AGES.
 
2013-06-20 11:28:58 AM  
That's okay, it's just a stepladder. It's not like it was her real ladder or anything.
 
2013-06-20 11:35:55 AM  
Well, looks like this joke has already been done to death already fifteen comments in... but came here to say " you can't tell me what to do! You're not my real ladder"
 
2013-06-20 11:36:40 AM  
Anyone got a better way to dispose of a large wooden object that doesn't involve expense and/or transporting it in a vehicle?
 
2013-06-20 11:38:39 AM  
www.myaandplicense.com
 
2013-06-20 11:38:57 AM  
I can totally see where she's coming from. I find it is conducive to proper yard equipment operation to periodically make an example of one piece of equipment for the others, just so they know what happens if they don't cooperate. Weed whackers are typically the most unruly of my machines so every few years one is violently dismantled in front of the others. As a result, the lawn mower, chain saw, and leaf blower have worked flawlessly for years and my car always starts.
 
2013-06-20 11:43:06 AM  
Ladders can hurt you
This can kill you

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 12:00:09 PM  
Never get into a pissing match with a chainsaw

~Moulder 3 fingers
 
2013-06-20 12:01:12 PM  

Sybarite: Yeovil town crier, Bruce Trigger helped rescue Mrs Robinson.

DO-do-Do-DO-do-do-do


Ladder hates you more than you will know
 
2013-06-20 12:01:30 PM  
Take that you step ladder you!
 
2013-06-20 12:12:10 PM  
She didn't blame Obama? How odd.
 
2013-06-20 12:12:55 PM  

JerkStore: I can totally see where she's coming from. I find it is conducive to proper yard equipment operation to periodically make an example of one piece of equipment for the others, just so they know what happens if they don't cooperate. Weed whackers are typically the most unruly of my machines so every few years one is violently dismantled in front of the others. As a result, the lawn mower, chain saw, and leaf blower have worked flawlessly for years and my car always starts.


I read this in the voice of Mrs. Richard Bucket.
 
2013-06-20 12:16:21 PM  

Shostie: I can't be the only one who has committed acts of violence upon inanimate objects that scorned me.


Came to say this...Inanimates are diabolical. You need to put the fear of God in them once in a while.
 
2013-06-20 12:16:41 PM  
I'm confused by what the hell a town crier is.  The picture didn't help much.  Is it really some jagweed that goes around ringing a bell?
 
2013-06-20 12:20:10 PM  

LordBeavis: I'm confused by what the hell a town crier is.  The picture didn't help much.  Is it really some jagweed that goes around ringing a bell?


I found a pic...

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 12:23:53 PM  

Shostie: I can't be the only one who has committed acts of violence upon inanimate objects that scorned me.


Hell no you are not. You let inanimate objects run roughshod over you just ONCE and the word gets out that you're an easy mark.
 
2013-06-20 12:30:05 PM  
Is...is that a euphemism?
 
2013-06-20 01:03:46 PM  
Do they still even make wooden ladders?
 
2013-06-20 01:07:44 PM  
She couldn't reach the chachi?
 
2013-06-20 01:09:02 PM  
You suck-diddily-uck, Flanders.
 
2013-06-20 01:12:59 PM  

kvinesknows: ya know.. there is a reason MODERN stepladders have a note saying DONT STEP ON TOP STEP.


Isn't that a balance issue, not so much a prone to breaking issue? The problem in this case is a wooden ladder, which according to family, could be up to 50 years old. That thing breaking was just a matter of time.
 
2013-06-20 01:38:23 PM  

gopher321: It's a witch! Buuuurn it!


Well, it was made of wood. I bet it floats too.
 
2013-06-20 02:54:26 PM  

LordBeavis: I'm confused by what the hell a town crier is.  The picture didn't help much.  Is it really some jagweed that goes around ringing a bell?


The town crier was the equivalent of the public announcement system back in the days when most people were illiterate, paper was extremely expensive, etc...

He'd announce court proclamations, sentences, law changes, public service announcements, etc...  For a fee he could also announce more personal stuff - hiring, selling, weddings, etc...

Homer's picture with a tricorn hat and a bell is accurate, though the coat would be much more elaborate of course.
He'd ring the bell while shouting 'Oyez Oyez', which means roughly 'shut up and pay attention!', then give the announcement once enough people were paying attention.

The position is apparently experiencing something of a renaissance right now.  Giving good local announcements is more difficult as less people are listening to radio and most radio stations aren't local anymore anyways.
 
2013-06-20 06:07:31 PM  

Shostie: I can't be the only one who has committed acts of violence upon inanimate objects that scorned me.


You aren't the only one. I posted before you about doing the exact same thing.
 
2013-06-21 06:10:54 AM  
Surely I'm not the only one who scolds their toaster when it burns my bread?!
 
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