Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(CBS Sacramento)   Man who threw spear at passing car looks exactly the way you think he does. With mugshot goodness   ( sacramento.cbslocal.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, spears, deadly weapon  
•       •       •

17352 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jun 2013 at 6:48 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



95 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-06-19 03:01:20 PM  
There's also a story about a guy who threw an axe thru a car window. is this world turning into D&D?
 
2013-06-19 03:17:17 PM  
Bigfoot captured in Northern California!
 
2013-06-19 03:34:31 PM  
farking white spearchuckers....
 
2013-06-19 03:42:17 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 03:48:59 PM  
Jones was located by police and arrested for assault with a deadly weapon.

It's possible to assault a fender to death?? I bet this was the car:

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 03:49:37 PM  
Oh, and THANKS REAGAN!
 
2013-06-19 03:59:15 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-06-19 04:10:41 PM  

Arthur Jumbles: farking white spearchuckers....


We're taking it back.
 
2013-06-19 04:52:24 PM  

img.fark.net
"WHAT YEAR IS IT?!"

 
2013-06-19 04:54:10 PM  
I was expecting a "M*A*S*H" character.
 
2013-06-19 05:10:50 PM  
img.fark.netimg.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 05:34:26 PM  
Well I for one will not be taking part in this thread, and everyone here should be ashamed of themselves.  Reverse racism is NOT a laughing matter.

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 05:36:46 PM  
Do we know what kind of vehicle he hit?  An SUV could feed your tribe for months if you preserved it well but a Prius wouldn't last very long.
 
2013-06-19 05:52:57 PM  
BAD KILL THAT NO FEED FAMILY IT TOO CRUNCHY
 
2013-06-19 06:01:34 PM  
img.fark.net

I'd hit it.
 
2013-06-19 06:07:39 PM  

Godscrack: [img.fark.net image 300x226]

I'd hit it.


If whatever is in his mouth is what I think it is, someone already did.
 
2013-06-19 06:12:49 PM  
Older than I thought he would be
 
2013-06-19 06:14:09 PM  
If he threw it, doesn't that make it a javelin?
 
2013-06-19 06:20:45 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 06:26:59 PM  
Clearly the driver of the vehicle angered Mr Jones by refusing to switch to GEICO
 
2013-06-19 06:45:02 PM  

Godscrack: [img.fark.net image 531x800]


Quick and nicely done.
 
2013-06-19 06:51:51 PM  

PainInTheASP: Reverse racism is NOT a laughing matter.


img.fark.net

Double reverse racism.  It's for the birds!
 
2013-06-19 06:54:24 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: If he threw it, doesn't that make it a javelin?


Glock.
 
2013-06-19 06:55:25 PM  
www.wearysloth.com
 
2013-06-19 06:56:24 PM  

Skywolf the Scribbler: BAD KILL THAT NO FEED FAMILY IT TOO CRUNCHY


Oh fark. I don't know if I can handle another caveman thread. I ran out of booze.
 
2013-06-19 06:56:37 PM  
Damn, Nick Nolte's on one hell of a downhill slide.
 
2013-06-19 06:57:33 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 06:57:44 PM  

"SACRAMENTO (CBS13) - A man was arrested Tuesday night for spearing a passing vehicle. Jeffrey Jones, 56, was standing in the road ..."


It is Spearchucker Jones!!!

 
2013-06-19 06:58:14 PM  

dj_bigbird: There's also a story about a guy who threw an axe thru a car window. is this world turning into D&D?


It will once I learn how to cast a Lightning Bolt, Lightning Bolt , Lightning Bolt spell.
 
2013-06-19 06:59:08 PM  
I closed my eyes, and thought about how he would look.  I clicked, and opened my eyes and laughed my ass off.  Not even close to what I was thinking, but so much better.
 
2013-06-19 06:59:08 PM  
not what I expected
fattystrains.homestead.com
 
2013-06-19 06:59:35 PM  
Impalas can be tasty.
 
2013-06-19 07:00:39 PM  

img.fark.net

"I'm now accused of doing what?!"

 
2013-06-19 07:00:57 PM  
How the hell do you skin a car?
 
2013-06-19 07:01:05 PM  
Did it go SMASH, SMASH...SUH-MASH?
 
2013-06-19 07:01:12 PM  
Honestly, this was the first thing that came to mind.

library.uncg.edu
 
2013-06-19 07:01:32 PM  

Ponzholio: [img.fark.net image 240x320]


Damn it....I was too slow. Well done.
 
2013-06-19 07:03:17 PM  
I was expecting Dr. Shakalu from Grandma's Boy.
 
2013-06-19 07:05:54 PM  
Did he use his Capital One card for bail?
 
2013-06-19 07:06:10 PM  
Three hots and a cot for the price of a spear?  I'd say he won this one.
 
2013-06-19 07:08:10 PM  
As long as he uses every piece of the car, I don't have a problem with this.
 
2013-06-19 07:16:44 PM  
IMPRESSED!

grades.tapity.com
 
2013-06-19 07:17:33 PM  
Uh oh!
 
2013-06-19 07:18:25 PM  
Encino man part 2!
 
2013-06-19 07:21:32 PM  

PacManDreaming: dj_bigbird: There's also a story about a guy who threw an axe thru a car window. is this world turning into D&D?

It will once I learn how to cast a Lightning Bolt, Lightning Bolt , Lightning Bolt spell.


i just want one single functional wish/alter reality spell
 
2013-06-19 07:22:05 PM  

HindiDiscoMonster: PacManDreaming: dj_bigbird: There's also a story about a guy who threw an axe thru a car window. is this world turning into D&D?

It will once I learn how to cast a Lightning Bolt, Lightning Bolt , Lightning Bolt spell.

i just want one single functional wish/alter reality spell


Looks like we've already got a portable hole.
 
2013-06-19 07:23:07 PM  
24.media.tumblr.com

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I'm just a caveman. I fell on some ice and later got thawed out by some of your scientists. Your world frightens and confuses me! Sometimes the honking horns of your traffic make me want to get out of my BMW.. and run off into the hills, or wherever.. Sometimes when I get a message on my fax machine, I wonder: "Did little demons get inside and type it?" I don't know! My primitive mind can't grasp these concepts. But there is one thing I do know - when a man like my client slips and throws a spear at a hulking roaring metal beast front of a public library, then he is entitled to no less than a full aquittal. Thank you.
 
2013-06-19 07:24:33 PM  

UNC_Samurai: HindiDiscoMonster: PacManDreaming: dj_bigbird: There's also a story about a guy who threw an axe thru a car window. is this world turning into D&D?

It will once I learn how to cast a Lightning Bolt, Lightning Bolt , Lightning Bolt spell.

i just want one single functional wish/alter reality spell

Looks like we've already got a portable hole.


add a portable fortress and i would be happy
 
2013-06-19 07:26:47 PM  

HindiDiscoMonster: UNC_Samurai: HindiDiscoMonster: PacManDreaming: dj_bigbird: There's also a story about a guy who threw an axe thru a car window. is this world turning into D&D?

It will once I learn how to cast a Lightning Bolt, Lightning Bolt , Lightning Bolt spell.

i just want one single functional wish/alter reality spell

Looks like we've already got a portable hole.

add a portable fortress and i would be happy


That's NOT what they meant by "Leomund's Tiny Hut".
 
2013-06-19 07:27:31 PM  

UNC_Samurai: HindiDiscoMonster: UNC_Samurai: HindiDiscoMonster: PacManDreaming: dj_bigbird: There's also a story about a guy who threw an axe thru a car window. is this world turning into D&D?

It will once I learn how to cast a Lightning Bolt, Lightning Bolt , Lightning Bolt spell.

i just want one single functional wish/alter reality spell

Looks like we've already got a portable hole.

add a portable fortress and i would be happy

That's NOT what they meant by "Leomund's Tiny Hut".


no, but it might fit in there...
 
2013-06-19 07:32:55 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 07:48:39 PM  

Boris S. Wort: [www.wearysloth.com image 320x240]


img.fark.net

*shakes tiny spear*
 
2013-06-19 07:54:54 PM  
img.fark.net
I willllll remember youuuuuuu....
 
2013-06-19 08:02:42 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 08:05:27 PM  
 
2013-06-19 08:06:24 PM  
 
2013-06-19 08:07:51 PM  
drawception.com
 
2013-06-19 08:14:22 PM  
img.fark.net

IT'S..........
 
2013-06-19 08:17:09 PM  
Subby apparently has no clue as to what we think.
 
2013-06-19 08:19:20 PM  
Yup.
 
2013-06-19 08:22:44 PM  
between this article and the caveman looking guy in the subway vid i think its safe to say space and time is falling apart. cavemen confused about being tossed into modern day.
 
2013-06-19 08:23:44 PM  
WTF?  Was this guy hunting the wild Subaru in it's native habitat?

Don't go back to Annadale....

/no idea what I'm talking about
 
2013-06-19 08:25:14 PM  
Did he order a bottle of anything, and glazed donut TO GO-O-O-O?
 
2013-06-19 08:26:43 PM  
Also, "so easy a caveman could do it" strangely absent from TFT
 
2013-06-19 08:29:56 PM  
www.barbara-bach.com

I'd throw my spear at her if you know what I mean
 
2013-06-19 08:32:39 PM  

ReverendJynxed: Subby apparently has no clue as to what we think.


Well, they're not mindreaders.  Modmins' crystal balls only pick up channel 3, or so I've heard.
 
2013-06-19 08:43:30 PM  
img818.imageshack.us

"Spearchukker".
"Honkey".
 
2013-06-19 08:45:13 PM  
Dad is just being silly again.  Mom done told him she can't cook those.

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 08:56:18 PM  
farking neck bearded hipsters...
 
2013-06-19 08:58:01 PM  
Three hots and a cot.  Didn't kill anyone and didn't get beat up so  - it's all good.
See you in six, bub . . .
 
2013-06-19 08:58:58 PM  

Alleyoop: Dad is just being silly again.  Mom done told him she can't cook those.

[img.fark.net image 400x275]


Hey asshole, if you are going to post Alley Oop frames at least have the decency to post the big breasted chicks.
 
2013-06-19 09:12:16 PM  

specialkae: easy


no shiat...took long enough
 
2013-06-19 09:23:48 PM  
img.fark.net

"Hullo Mummy! I'm home for holiday!"
 
2013-06-19 09:26:01 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 09:26:05 PM  

tuna fingers: Alleyoop: Dad is just being silly again.  Mom done told him she can't cook those.

[img.fark.net image 400x275]

Well done,  Hey asshole, if you are going to finally a post of Alley Oop frames that at least have the decency to accurately depict man and dinosaur coexisting in our 6,000 year old world rather than to post the big breasted chicks we've grown accustomed to that give our daughters a poor body image.


ftfy
 
2013-06-19 09:33:10 PM  
The driver better hope he didn't let his Geico insurance expire.
 
2013-06-19 10:41:22 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: If he threw it, doesn't that make it a javelin?


No, a javelin is a specific kind of throwing spear.
 
2013-06-19 11:06:29 PM  

PainInTheASP: Well I for one will not be taking part in this thread, and everyone here should be ashamed of themselves.  Reverse racism is NOT a laughing matter.

[img.fark.net image 600x383]


There's no such thing as "reverse racism", it's just racism.  The very term "reverse racism" is racist in its implication that only Caucasians are capable of being racists.

/ no one gets that
 
2013-06-19 11:12:30 PM  
By the way, this guy chucked the spear a few blocks from where I live.  Guys like him make up most of the male population of pedestrians you see in this area.  There's a creek, small hidden parks, abandoned buildings, smoke shops, liquor stores, a sex boutique and crappy fast food joints all along the area he was spearchucking.

/ I am armed every time i go out, and I also look like one of them, beard and all, to blend in.
 
2013-06-19 11:26:12 PM  
FTFA: "The spear was booked as evidence."

Dammit.  And I was hoping that CrazyCurt could run out there and grab himself up new a throwin' stick.  Oh well.  In any case, that is fine investigative reporting from the Sacramento news crew.  No way the Pulitzer people can ignore you now, guys!
 
2013-06-20 12:35:05 AM  
Can't tell if loincloth.
 
2013-06-20 12:57:06 AM  
WTF....does he have a load of jiz in his mouth?
 
2013-06-20 01:35:06 AM  
 Came for a Photoshop of perp with bone in hair or nose..Leaving unsatisfied..
 
2013-06-20 01:44:37 AM  
I gotta say, I was honestly expecting something more like this:

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 04:17:54 AM  
AAAaaand we've got a Whiskey Tango Foxtrot image.
 
2013-06-20 05:23:50 AM  

uncleacid: Impalas can be tasty.


Well if my car has that name, I know it be ASKING for it.
 
2013-06-20 06:15:16 AM  

macadamnut: Boris S. Wort: [www.wearysloth.com image 320x240]

[img.fark.net image 500x375]

*shakes tiny spear*

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 06:25:44 AM  
I was thinking a few more teeth?
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-20 08:00:30 AM  

minnkat: [img.fark.net image 689x314]


The resemblance is uncanny
 
2013-06-20 09:16:07 AM  

johnnygew: I was thinking a few more teeth?
[img.fark.net image 259x195]


Tyra Banks?
 
2013-06-20 01:06:45 PM  
img.fark.net

He must have thought it was some strange rhino with round legs.

/God, he must be crazy or something.
 
2013-06-20 03:48:38 PM  
What they are leaving out in TFA is that the "spear" (whatever it was) weighed 40 pounds.
 
2013-06-20 08:18:16 PM  

some_beer_drinker: specialkae: easy

no shiat...took long enough


Went to bed early and missed your post.  And no, no, I am not :) Ask my other half, he'll tell you I'm the most difficult woman on the planet to get into bed.  Hell, it took him 18 years and he's far better looking then I am.  Now, you are favorited, sir :) thanks for the post thread giggle.
 
2013-06-21 12:46:19 AM  

tuna fingers: Hey asshole, if you are going to post Alley Oop frames at least have the decency to post the big breasted chicks.


img.fark.net

/hubba hubba
 
2013-06-21 05:00:53 AM  

specialkae: some_beer_drinker: specialkae: easy

no shiat...took long enough

Went to bed early and missed your post.  And no, no, I am not :) Ask my other half, he'll tell you I'm the most difficult woman on the planet to get into bed.  Hell, it took him 18 years and he's far better looking then I am.  Now, you are favorited, sir :) thanks for the post thread giggle.


18 years? Good Lord! That is very rare these days. Very romantic! I'd like to ask you some questions that are none of my farking business, but if you will humor me.....
1) Were you each other's firsts?
2) Are you each other's lasts (so far)?
/Good for you both either way. It takes a very deep level of commitment and self control to pull something like that off.
 
Displayed 95 of 95 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.

In Other Media
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report