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(YouTube)   Hunter: I'm safe up here in my treetop hunting perch. Black bear: OH HAI   (youtube.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, Oh Hai  
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6970 clicks; posted to Video » on 19 Jun 2013 at 2:19 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-19 01:52:30 PM  
OK, I have to say the guy was calmer than I would have been.
 
2013-06-19 02:06:15 PM  
He's not hurting anybody.  He's just hanging out, exercising his 2nd amendment right to bear arms, just like the hunter.
 
2013-06-19 02:10:03 PM  
That bear ascended that last bit of distance on that tree pretty quick. I think seeing that would have freaked me out.
 
2013-06-19 02:13:03 PM  
My guess is that the hunter brought some smelly lunch along.
 
2013-06-19 02:23:09 PM  
He was trying to get away from that second bear.

"Oh, hey. I didn't see you up here. Is that platform big enough for the two of us? No? Uh...well...this is awkward. I guess I'll go back down now."
 
2013-06-19 02:29:13 PM  
i bet the bear is also smart enough to turn the camera horizontally.
 
2013-06-19 02:38:56 PM  

dittybopper: OK, I have to say the guy was calmer than I would have been.


I am guessing he had a rather large firearm pointed at the bear, in case things went all bitey/scratchy. Or he just shiat himself, which is my usual method of defense when it comes to tree-climbing ursines.
 
2013-06-19 02:39:05 PM  

serial_crusher: He's not hurting anybody.  He's just hanging out, exercising his 2nd amendment right to bear arms, just like the hunter.


You owe me a new keyboard...
 
2013-06-19 02:41:30 PM  
Was that Boo Boo Honey Bear's mom looking for their lost pic-i-nic basket?  I thought the snorts gave her away.
 
2013-06-19 02:43:08 PM  
Had he just made some human noises to let the bear know he was up there, it would have been a less frightening encounter.  Like it's been pointed out, the bear likely followed the smell of his lunch up the tree, then finally smelled the hunter.
 
2013-06-19 02:54:01 PM  
Took some big balls not to shoot that bear and give it a chance to climb down.
 
2013-06-19 03:03:54 PM  
I would be in need of a clean set of underwears after that encounter.
 
2013-06-19 03:08:48 PM  

Shryke: dittybopper: OK, I have to say the guy was calmer than I would have been.

I am guessing he had a rather large firearm pointed at the bear, in case things went all bitey/scratchy. Or he just shiat himself, which is my usual method of defense when it comes to tree-climbing ursines.


Nope.  Guy is a bow hunter.  You can see his wheelie bow hanging up in the tree near the end.
 
2013-06-19 03:24:06 PM  

dittybopper: Shryke: dittybopper: OK, I have to say the guy was calmer than I would have been.

I am guessing he had a rather large firearm pointed at the bear, in case things went all bitey/scratchy. Or he just shiat himself, which is my usual method of defense when it comes to tree-climbing ursines.

Nope.  Guy is a bow hunter.  You can see his wheelie bow hanging up in the tree near the end.


You can both hunt with bows, and keep a firearm for defense against bears.
 
2013-06-19 03:31:10 PM  

chopit: dittybopper: Shryke: dittybopper: OK, I have to say the guy was calmer than I would have been.

I am guessing he had a rather large firearm pointed at the bear, in case things went all bitey/scratchy. Or he just shiat himself, which is my usual method of defense when it comes to tree-climbing ursines.

Nope.  Guy is a bow hunter.  You can see his wheelie bow hanging up in the tree near the end.

You can both hunt with bows, and keep a firearm for defense against bears.


Yes,  I know, but if he had one, don't you think he would have been holding that instead of the camera?

/I don't take a firearm when I bowhunt.
//Then again, I don't take a bow with training wheels on it either.
 
2013-06-19 03:37:35 PM  

Tyee: Took some big balls not to shoot that bear and give it a chance to climb down.


^^



^^THIS
 
2013-06-19 03:40:25 PM  
I would have shot the same exact video. Only it would have been more dramatic with all the little-girl-screaming sound and stuff.

That dude kept it together.
 
2013-06-19 03:46:06 PM  

dittybopper: chopit: dittybopper: Shryke: dittybopper: OK, I have to say the guy was calmer than I would have been.

I am guessing he had a rather large firearm pointed at the bear, in case things went all bitey/scratchy. Or he just shiat himself, which is my usual method of defense when it comes to tree-climbing ursines.

Nope.  Guy is a bow hunter.  You can see his wheelie bow hanging up in the tree near the end.

You can both hunt with bows, and keep a firearm for defense against bears.

Yes,  I know, but if he had one, don't you think he would have been holding that instead of the camera?

/I don't take a firearm when I bowhunt.
//Then again, I don't take a bow with training wheels on it either.


Someone told him you can shoot a bear in self defense.  He just chose to shoot it vertically.  Moran.
 
2013-06-19 03:47:48 PM  
The hunter was obviously shaking a little, but he kept it together.  Wonder if he had a revolver with him.
 
2013-06-19 03:48:42 PM  
This has already happened,

http://youtu.be/9VQSZ4c20KE
 
2013-06-19 03:53:29 PM  

dittybopper: OK, I have to say the guy was calmer than I would have been.


He's noticeably shaking in the 2nd half of the video.

/I would have screamed like a little girl
 
2013-06-19 03:54:24 PM  

GonzoNihilist: Tyee: Took some big balls not to shoot that bear and give it a chance to climb down.

^^

^^THIS


He had no choice: That was a bear cub.
Did you see the mama bear ~@1:37 before he turned the camera back on himself?
 
2013-06-19 03:58:43 PM  

POO_FLINGA: This has already happened,

http://youtu.be/9VQSZ4c20KE


It happens all the damn time, including to me several times. It's very common for yearlings to go vertical when a bigger bear approaches.
 
2013-06-19 04:42:37 PM  
"You don't come here for the hunting, do you?"
 
2013-06-19 04:57:25 PM  

SlothB77: i bet the bear is also smart enough to turn the camera horizontally.


A round of applause for you, sir and/or ma'am.
 
2013-06-19 04:57:42 PM  

POO_FLINGA: This has already happened,

http://youtu.be/9VQSZ4c20KE


That's hunting? Standing up in a tree waiting for something to pass you by so you can shoot it? Why shoot a bear? I dont get that at all. Do you eat bear meat? Or is it just so you can jerk off to the memory of killing something?The look of acomplishment and pride on that fat turd's face is really annoying.
 
2013-06-19 05:01:23 PM  
Reminds me of The Onion's great piece: Bear Attacks, Rapes Zookeeper

Here's a little dog-bites-man tale I couldn't resist! Except replace "dog" with "850-pound black bear"! And "bites" with "anally violate"!
Yes, last Saturday a zookeeper at the Metropolitan Zoo had "claws" for alarm when he was attacked and raped by the same black bear he had raised from a cub! Geez, talk about gratitude!
"It was horrible, just horrible, " sobbed an eyewitness. Guess she sure got an eyeful!
The bear, named "Barry", " attacked zookeeper Ron Gilks as Gilks entered the cage to give him dinner. Barry lunged at his throat, goring him with his huge claws and razor-sharp teeth. Some of the claw marks were three-quarters of an inch deep. Ouch!
Then, astonished onlookers could "bearly" believe what happened next--Barry began to brutally rape zookeeper Gilks!
Frantic zookeepers rushed for rifles as others tried to divert the bear. But there was no stopping Barry! This bear kept "bearing down, " and Gilks just had to grin and "bear" it! Maybe Barry was mistaking him for his "honey"!
Barry's 27-inch phallus, armed with guard hairs as sharp as red-hot needles, shot through Gilks' rectum, shattered his lower spine and skewered his colon, causing his entire lower torso to "cave" in! Yikes! Bet that wasn't the type of "cave" you had in mind when you took up zookeeping, Mr. Gilks!
And can you imagine Gilks' surprise when Barry's putrid ursine semen flooded his ruptured chest cavity? (By the way, Mr. Gilks, whatever cologne you've been wearing, where can the public get some?)
Finally, zookeeper Eric Pulliam shot Barry with a tranquilizer gun and pulled Gilks from the cage. The unconscious bear was later destroyed. Hey, this "Yogi" made a major "Boo-Boo"!
"I have worked with dangerous animals before, " zoo director Kate Donegal said. "But never have I seen any animal sexually assault a human being." "Barry"? Try "Scary"!
Meanwhile, Gilks was pronounced dead at an area hospital--but at least he died grinning and bearing it! No doubt, this episode gives new meaning to the term, "Do not feed the bears!"
 
2013-06-19 05:10:08 PM  
That would be simultaneously my nightmare and my fantasy.

Pretty sure after hyperventilating I couldn't resist the urge to pet it.

Well that was fun and satisfying for about a millisecond.

Adios arms!  Was nice knowing you!
 
2013-06-19 05:15:50 PM  

spacemanjones: Do you eat bear meat?


Yep.

And the rendered fat makes for some of the best boot grease on the planet.  And never forget the rugs you can make. Those are awesome, especially when place right next to an open fireplace.
 
2013-06-19 05:24:23 PM  

HeadLever: spacemanjones: Do you eat bear meat?

Yep.

And the rendered fat makes for some of the best boot grease on the planet.  And never forget the rugs you can make. Those are awesome, especially when place right next to an open fireplace.


You can predict the weather with bear fat too. If you're hill folk that is.
 
2013-06-19 05:30:47 PM  
Heh. This is my landlady's cousin.

/Bueller?
 
2013-06-19 05:32:07 PM  

whither_apophis: You can predict the weather with bear fat too


Hmm, never heard of that one before now.  Looks to be a pretty good following behind that - though it appears that you don't have to be hill folk.  Sounds like some city slickers are just as 'adept' at reading the fat.
 
2013-06-19 05:43:44 PM  

brap: That would be simultaneously my nightmare and my fantasy.

Pretty sure after hyperventilating I couldn't resist the urge to pet it.

Well that was fun and satisfying for about a millisecond.

Adios arms!  Was nice knowing you!


I also would have to try real hard to curb my instinct to pet it or touch it.
 
2013-06-19 05:43:47 PM  
I tend to make noise when in bear country. I even hang my large set of keys and climbing biners on my rucksack so that it makes lots of noise when I walk. Never been that close to a bear.

So my question to you Farkers who are also hunters, if a bear was that close to you and you pooped yourself and/or screamed like a big girl, what would the bear do? Serious question.
 
2013-06-19 05:48:41 PM  
Best part of my job is seeing big manly European men turn into whimpering babies when you get within bow range of a black bear. They are not that scary really. It's the guides that get scared when we are within bow range of a rutting bull moose. You do not want to miss that shot... You will die!
 
2013-06-19 05:53:07 PM  

HeadLever: spacemanjones: Do you eat bear meat?

Yep.

And the rendered fat makes for some of the best boot grease on the planet.  And never forget the rugs you can make. Those are awesome, especially when place right next to an open fireplace.


Bear fat is very corrosive. Don't use it on boots... All the eyelets and laces will get destroyed. Along with all the stitching. It will also reduce the life span of your leather significantly.

It will stain 400 series stainless in a couple hours.
 
2013-06-19 06:04:43 PM  

Shryke: dittybopper: OK, I have to say the guy was calmer than I would have been.

I am guessing he had a rather large firearm pointed at the bear, in case things went all bitey/scratchy. Or he just shiat himself, which is my usual method of defense when it comes to tree-climbing ursines.


I'll go with this. The bear didn't care for the sudden smell of crap and piss and decided to go for a more appetizing lunch.
 
2013-06-19 06:33:12 PM  
D'awwwww, what a cute bear.
 
2013-06-19 06:34:12 PM  
Apparently the Internet forgets.
 
2013-06-19 06:47:04 PM  

Mad Tea Party: D'awwwww, what a cute bear.


So cute that it could have easily killed that hunter.
 
2013-06-19 06:57:17 PM  

crab66: Mad Tea Party: D'awwwww, what a cute bear.

So cute that it could have easily killed that hunter.


Yeah but it would have been a cute and cuddly way to die.
 
2013-06-19 07:40:46 PM  
Needs one of these to blow at the bear just when he sticks his nose into the camera.

www.thedailygreen.com

/could be hilarious
//no guarantees though
 
2013-06-19 09:24:43 PM  

dittybopper: chopit: dittybopper: Shryke: dittybopper: OK, I have to say the guy was calmer than I would have been.

I am guessing he had a rather large firearm pointed at the bear, in case things went all bitey/scratchy. Or he just shiat himself, which is my usual method of defense when it comes to tree-climbing ursines.

Nope.  Guy is a bow hunter.  You can see his wheelie bow hanging up in the tree near the end.

You can both hunt with bows, and keep a firearm for defense against bears.

Yes,  I know, but if he had one, don't you think he would have been holding that instead of the camera?

/I don't take a firearm when I bowhunt.
//Then again, I don't take a bow with training wheels on it either.


Heh. Never heard compounds referred to that way.
 
2013-06-19 10:04:10 PM  

weapon13: I tend to make noise when in bear country. I even hang my large set of keys and climbing biners on my rucksack so that it makes lots of noise when I walk. Never been that close to a bear.

So my question to you Farkers who are also hunters, if a bear was that close to you and you pooped yourself and/or screamed like a big girl, what would the bear do? Serious question.


Run. Fast. There's a teeny tiny chance that a scream at a few feet would trigger the wrong kind of fight-or-flight response, but it's still incredibly unlikely. There's almost nothing at all a human can do to trigger a bad response from a healthy black bear. Grizz and browns are a completely different story.
 
2013-06-19 10:09:51 PM  
Well I use Mac/Linux...

"You don't come here for the hunting, do you?"

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 10:27:06 PM  
spacemanjones

Why shoot a bear?

Mostly because I know it pisses off whiny little biatches.
 
2013-06-19 10:44:16 PM  

spacemanjones: POO_FLINGA: This has already happened,

http://youtu.be/9VQSZ4c20KE

That's hunting? Standing up in a tree waiting for something to pass you by so you can shoot it? Why shoot a bear? I dont get that at all. Do you eat bear meat? Or is it just so you can jerk off to the memory of killing something?The look of acomplishment and pride on that fat turd's face is really annoying.


Bear tastes great. And the skins are very nice. Decent leather from the hide too.

When bear hunting it is very important to only shoot boars because females populations are very sensitive to harvest, which really reduces overall populations. One boar can breed multiple sows. So hunting in stands and using bait makes sense because it gives you the opportunity to see many bears and be selective with your kill. Spot and stalk is more of a challenge, but the likelihood of shooting a sow or young bear is significantly greater. It is hard to judge sex and size for black bears, so anything that gives you more time to make a smart decision is the way to go. Not everyone is comfortable or able to sit and watch a bear for 30 mins from 40 yards to ensure it's a shooter.

I wouldn't ever stand hunt blackies because there are so many natural food sources around my area that I can spot more bears by hiking in-between a half dozen grassy patches. What I do is no more sporting than hunting over bait.. just different. Bear hunting is easy no matter how ya do it. A black bear is easy to find and predictable.

Great way to get some Yummy sausage and jerky meat in the spring when the moose and deer is running out from last fall.
 
2013-06-20 12:35:54 AM  
The way you tell the difference between a black bear and a grizzly is that a grizzly will shake you out of the tree and eat you, a black bear climbs up the tree and eats you.
 
2013-06-20 01:08:53 AM  
What kind of bear is best?
 
2013-06-20 03:54:46 AM  
A bear-back.
 
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