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(Washington Times)   New Immigration Bill weighs 24 pounds, Democrats hope they'll have no trouble getting it across the border   (washingtontimes.com) divider line 59
    More: Unlikely, new immigration, Democrats, immigration bill, border security, Florida Republican, John Cornyn, guest worker program, borders  
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272 clicks; posted to Politics » on 19 Jun 2013 at 10:56 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-19 09:49:38 AM  
At 1,075 pages long, it's not the biggest bill to come through in recent years - that honor still belongs to the health care law - but the immigration legislation in the Senate is challenging the ability of voters to get their brains around its complexity.

I don't give a f*ck what the legislation in question is. It's your goddamned job to read and understand these bills. If you are unable or unwilling to do so, retire and let someone who can represent your district or state.

I"m really goddamned tired of accepting lazy f*cking whining on the part of slackass politicians who don't want to do their jobs.
 
2013-06-19 10:07:45 AM  
Sounds like someone's whining that they are mentally and intellectually incapable of doing their job.
 
2013-06-19 10:17:50 AM  
Ever seen what a Senate or House Bill looks like on paper? They use huge margins with massive fonts and a lot of extra spacing. Plus, if you look at the actual bill itself (S. 744), nearly half of the pages in the bill is comprised of the portions of the current law that is struck out (i.e. being deleted).

If you take out the parts of the current law that is being struck out and just have the text of the updated law, it's like a 300 page document (assuming you use regular-sized fonts and margins and spacing).

Here's Ted Cruz's latest stinker, just for reference:

img.fark.net
img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 10:18:32 AM  
WHEREAS the immigration bill is too many words to read, and

WHEREAS we already have too many Mexicans here already,


SECTION 1 TITLE Immigration Reform Act


(a) Beaners go home
 
2013-06-19 10:18:48 AM  
HEY, ASSHOLES, IF YOU'RE ELECTED TO CONGRESS, A LARGE PART OF YOUR JOB INVOLVES READING F*CKING LEGISLATION, YOU WORTHLESS, LAZY F*CKS.
 
2013-06-19 10:38:34 AM  
This has always struck me as the most "appealing to stupidity" form of argument any political discussion can take.
 
2013-06-19 10:45:03 AM  
Ah, good, an immigration bill which will grant reward folks for breaking the law.
 
2013-06-19 10:51:31 AM  

minoridiot: Ah, good, an immigration bill which will grant reward folks for breaking the law.


Ah its your, minoridiot. I knew you wouldn't take too long. A fateful servant at his post once more.
 
2013-06-19 10:59:01 AM  
Is this the thread where people who swear by Ayn Rand's voluminous tome that reads, "GIMME GIMME GIMME" insist that a piece of legislation is too long and difficult to read?
 
2013-06-19 11:00:42 AM  
Well it's not going to pass anyway so all those trees died for nothing.
 
2013-06-19 11:01:30 AM  

FlashHarry: HEY, ASSHOLES, IF YOU'RE ELECTED TO CONGRESS, A LARGE PART OF YOUR JOB INVOLVES READING F*CKING LEGISLATION, YOU WORTHLESS, LAZY F*CKS.


That's really hard, though! We should probably do something like supply them with a taxpayer-funded legislative staff to make it easier to read things.
 
2013-06-19 11:02:03 AM  

minoridiot: Ah, good, an immigration bill which will grant reward folks for breaking the law.


You mean you already read the bill?

Maybe you should run for Congress.
 
2013-06-19 11:02:31 AM  
This is a complicated problem.  Why do you expect a simple solution?
 
2013-06-19 11:03:40 AM  
and they print how many copies of this per representative/senator and their staffers?

jfc.
 
2013-06-19 11:05:03 AM  

DamnYankees: minoridiot: Ah, good, an immigration bill which will grant reward folks for breaking the law.

Ah its your, minoridiot. I knew you wouldn't take too long. A fateful servant at his post once more.


I'm also a legal immigrant.  Perhaps if the US focused on enforcing the existing laws rather than spying on it's citizens, then we might not having the problems we are today.
 
2013-06-19 11:06:38 AM  
Hermann Cain's three page bill to deal with our immigration issues:

1. Kill immigrants
2. Buy my pizza
3. Buy my pizza
 
2013-06-19 11:07:29 AM  
If you're measuring paper usage in pounds you're doing it wrong.   Someone buy these assholes a Kindle.  Jesus.
 
2013-06-19 11:14:03 AM  

minoridiot: DamnYankees: minoridiot: Ah, good, an immigration bill which will grant reward folks for breaking the law.

Ah its your, minoridiot. I knew you wouldn't take too long. A fateful servant at his post once more.

I'm also a legal immigrant.  Perhaps if the US focused on enforcing the existing laws rather than spying on it's citizens, then we might not having the problems we are today.


The amount of resources to be allocated between "enforcing the existing laws" (whatever that is supposed to mean) and NSA wiretapping is withdrawn from a fixed pie.
 
2013-06-19 11:14:27 AM  
Everyone relax.  I'm sure they'll figure out what's in it once they pass it.

img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 11:14:31 AM  
If the bill contains an expanded H1B program, I hope it goes down in flame.
 
2013-06-19 11:17:13 AM  
Late last week, House Judiciary Committee Chairman Bob Goodlatte, Virginia Republican, announced that he would begin taking up pieces of the immigration puzzle: a 53-page bill to create a guest-worker program for agriculture and a 174-page bill to bolster interior immigration enforcement.

1076 pages is too long.  So the Republican proposal is 227 pages, which contains nothing about border security, a path to citizenship, or even changing the immigration process at all.  I know this is an amazing concept - but complex problems usually have complex solutions.

And I'll second what's said elsewhere here: if your job - reading proposed laws and voting upon them - is beyond your capability: THEN JUST farkING RESIGN!
 
2013-06-19 11:18:37 AM  

Leader O'Cola: and they print how many copies of this per representative/senator and their staffers?

jfc.


Well, I would hope that some of them use modern technology - say, a Newton, or perhaps a laptop - to transmit and read digital copies rather than lug 24-pound TPS reports.

// I hear the really newfangled ones allow you to mark up and comment on the text as well
 
2013-06-19 11:19:52 AM  

Rapmaster2000: This is a complicated problem.  Why do you expect a simple solution?


It's a simple problem made complicated by Congress.

The solution is a few hundred words in English, or a few hundred pages in Legislative.
 
2013-06-19 11:21:03 AM  

BMFPitt: The solution is a few hundred words in English, or a few hundred pages in Legislative.


If only a few of those politicians had studied law or something, they'd be able to understand that moonman mumbo-jumbo on the pages.
 
2013-06-19 11:21:25 AM  

Saiga410: If the bill contains an expanded H1B program, I hope it goes down in flame.


Fark off with your protectionism.
 
2013-06-19 11:21:57 AM  
"It's heavy and full of grown-up words!  I can't be expected to read!"


Yep.  This country is truly boned when the mid-double-digit IQs in charge think that a bill should be ignored because they're too physically and intellectually weak to handle the thing.
 
2013-06-19 11:22:03 AM  

BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: This is a complicated problem.  Why do you expect a simple solution?

It's a simple problem made complicated by Congress.

The solution is a few hundred words in English, or a few hundred pages in Legislative.


The problem with "simple" concepts that can be expressed in a few hundred words in English is that the ambiguity it generates will often create thousands of lawsuits later. This is why laws are expressed in really dry and technical language - to remove as much ambiguity from the law as possible.
 
2013-06-19 11:23:13 AM  

BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: This is a complicated problem.  Why do you expect a simple solution?

It's a simple problem


Yes, the solution is to Secure The Borders and Enforce The Existing Laws.  That will fix it.
 
2013-06-19 11:24:05 AM  

Dr Dreidel: say, a Newton, or perhaps a laptop


img.fark.net
 
2013-06-19 11:24:33 AM  

EyeballKid: BMFPitt: The solution is a few hundred words in English, or a few hundred pages in Legislative.

If only a few of those politicians had studied law or something, they'd be able to understand that moonman mumbo-jumbo on the pages.


It's not really legalese as much as it's insane formatting and going into really specific details on things that you don't want to be creatively interpreted.
 
2013-06-19 11:24:51 AM  

minoridiot: DamnYankees: minoridiot: Ah, good, an immigration bill which will grant reward folks for breaking the law.

Ah its your, minoridiot. I knew you wouldn't take too long. A fateful servant at his post once more.

I'm also a legal immigrant.  Perhaps if the US focused on enforcing the existing laws rather than spying on it's citizens, then we might not having the problems we are today.


Get it, you do not.
 
2013-06-19 11:27:13 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Yes, the solution is to Secure The Borders and Enforce The Existing Laws.  That will fix it.


The Republicans will put on a face that they want border security.  But quietly, the don't, because they know if that happens, their stream of hired help, such as the maids, gardeners, etc will dry up.
 
2013-06-19 12:28:21 PM  

Rapmaster2000: BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: This is a complicated problem.  Why do you expect a simple solution?

It's a simple problem

Yes, the solution is to Secure The Borders and Enforce The Existing Laws.  That will fix it.


The existing laws are the problem.
 
2013-06-19 12:32:33 PM  

BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: This is a complicated problem.  Why do you expect a simple solution?

It's a simple problem

Yes, the solution is to Secure The Borders and Enforce The Existing Laws.  That will fix it.

The existing laws are the problem.


Well, we definitely need to fix it.  The solution is simple, but the libs don't want to fix it.  They are preventing a fix.
 
2013-06-19 12:33:15 PM  
ts2.mm.bing.net

"It shouldn't be longer than three pages!"
 
2013-06-19 12:40:05 PM  

Rapmaster2000: BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: This is a complicated problem.  Why do you expect a simple solution?

It's a simple problem

Yes, the solution is to Secure The Borders and Enforce The Existing Laws.  That will fix it.

The existing laws are the problem.

Well, we definitely need to fix it.  The solution is simple, but the libs don't want to fix it.  They are preventing a fix.


Well at least you can both agree that people shouldn't be free to make their own economic choices.
 
2013-06-19 12:45:02 PM  

BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: BMFPitt: Rapmaster2000: This is a complicated problem.  Why do you expect a simple solution?

It's a simple problem

Yes, the solution is to Secure The Borders and Enforce The Existing Laws.  That will fix it.

The existing laws are the problem.

Well, we definitely need to fix it.  The solution is simple, but the libs don't want to fix it.  They are preventing a fix.

Well at least you can both agree that people shouldn't be free to make their own economic choices.


That's very simple.
 
2013-06-19 12:58:21 PM  

Rapmaster2000: Well, we definitely need to fix it.  The solution is simple, but the libs don't want to fix it.  They are preventing a fix.


which is why I am calling my congressman today and bugging him to support the Kill All Non-Aryans bill
 
2013-06-19 01:06:00 PM  

Jackson Herring: Rapmaster2000: Well, we definitely need to fix it.  The solution is simple, but the libs don't want to fix it.  They are preventing a fix.

which is why I am calling my congressman today and bugging him to support the Kill All Non-Aryans bill


Well, at least that solution has some finality to it.
 
2013-06-19 01:11:48 PM  
24 pounds for 1075 pages?  That's about 45 pages per pound.  Does that seem right?  Put another way, that's over 11 pounds for a ream of paper.  Osmium paper?
 
2013-06-19 01:17:01 PM  

Aquapope: 24 pounds for 1075 pages?  That's about 45 pages per pound.  Does that seem right?  Put another way, that's over 11 pounds for a ream of paper.  Osmium paper?


Red state paper. It ain't gonna follow Moo-shell Obammy's fascist soshulist diet plan! FREEEDUUUUUMB!
 
2013-06-19 01:18:37 PM  
Gohmert submitted a post-it with "bild the dang fens" written on it but he couldn't get a co-sponsor.
 
2013-06-19 01:20:22 PM  

PanicMan: If you're measuring paper usage in pounds you're doing it wrong.   Someone buy these assholes a Kindle.  Jesus.


That's the problem.  It took 24 pounds of kindles, all full with segments of the legislation, to carry it all.  ;)

RexTalionis: This is why laws are expressed in really dry and technical language - to remove as much ambiguity from the law as possible.


Bingo.

"Murder is illegal" Is good 'plain english'.  However, even if you keep it in plain english it ends up being a couple pages to set down what murder actually is in this context, the differences between Murder 1, 2, 3, and manslaughter, the potential penalties for each class, any affirmative defenses(such as self defense), etc...

And while murder is horrible from a personal standpoint, it's actually one of the easiest laws out there.  Copyright law, for example, is vastly more complicated.
 
2013-06-19 01:40:11 PM  

Aquapope: 24 pounds for 1075 pages?  That's about 45 pages per pound.  Does that seem right?  Put another way, that's over 11 pounds for a ream of paper.  Osmium paper?


Hmm...  Case of copy paper, 8.5x11", 20 lbs.  Contains 10 reams, 500 sheets/ream.  So each ream should be 2 pounds, and 1075 pages a shade over 4 pounds.

You could get that about 50% higher by going with high quality 'heavy' paper, and maybe double it if you go from double sided to single sided - but that's only 12 pounds.

So I tried to find the source: this "Californians for Population Stabilization", but didn't get anything but a cached copy of Op's article off of their website.  So it appears they didn't publish it on their website.
 
2013-06-19 01:46:03 PM  

Saiga410: If the bill contains an expanded H1B program, I hope it goes down in flame.


Eh?

/former H1B holder
//current resident alien
 
2013-06-19 01:50:45 PM  
Wouldn't it be easier to just invade Mexico and make it part of the US at this point?  Plus Cheney's Haliburton could make billions rebuilding Mexico, charging Premium rates while in actuality giving Mexicans the lowest wage humanly possible.
 
2013-06-19 01:53:07 PM  

Firethorn: Copyright law, for example, is vastly more complicated.


Only because we've allowed it to become such.  If there were a profit to be made in killing people on an industrial scale, the murder laws would be just as complex.
 
2013-06-19 01:58:14 PM  

DamnYankees: minoridiot: DamnYankees: minoridiot: Ah, good, an immigration bill which will grant reward folks for breaking the law.

Ah its your, minoridiot. I knew you wouldn't take too long. A fateful servant at his post once more.

I'm also a legal immigrant.  Perhaps if the US focused on enforcing the existing laws rather than spying on it's citizens, then we might not having the problems we are today.

Get it, you do not.


Of course not.  I'm a legal immigrant, so I stand to gain nothing from the immigration reform bill.
 
2013-06-19 02:34:39 PM  

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Gohmert submitted a post-it with "bild the dang fens" written on it but he couldn't get a co-sponsor.


Is this humor, or reportage?  It could go either way.

-and this is one of the funniest things I've seen on fark in a while.
 
2013-06-19 02:50:35 PM  
Are we revoking the business license of anyone who hires an illegal?
No?
Then it's not being fixed no matter how high the border wall is.
 
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