If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Onion AV Club)   Prometheus 2 will have more action, less Damon Lindelof   (avclub.com) divider line 173
    More: Cool, Damon Lindelof, Prometheus, Cowboys & Aliens, Paul Bettany, plot holes, Ridley Scott, Brad Bird, Dan O'Bannon  
•       •       •

4505 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 19 Jun 2013 at 3:40 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



173 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-06-19 12:22:14 AM
Yeah, cuz that was totally what was wrong with the first one. Nothint at all to do with it contradicting itself, characters doing things that made no sense for the characters, future technology so farkin' dumb we could make it now and have it be less stupid, and a main villain with the same weakness as Derek Zoolander.
 
2013-06-19 02:08:09 AM
Will it have less idiotic characters? No? Then I'll pass.
 
2013-06-19 02:31:28 AM
I enjoyed it.
 
2013-06-19 02:33:48 AM
I read the Alien: Engineers script. I got even more angry. I sold my bluray of Prometheus last week.
 
2013-06-19 03:11:57 AM
Prometheus was terribad
 
2013-06-19 03:47:14 AM
Stupid film.

Ridley Scott should put the camera down and enjoy retirement.
 
2013-06-19 03:48:04 AM
Probably would work best has like a 5 part mini series, to tell these stories completely they just need more time, I feel like so many new movies seem rushed
 
2013-06-19 03:50:34 AM
Most of the blame was laid at the feet of screenwriter Damon Lindelof, as fans expected him to maintain the high standards of tight plotting and unflinching realism he brought toCowboys & Aliens.

Oh, but I laughed.  Bravo, author.
 
2013-06-19 03:51:12 AM

GungFu: Stupid film.

Ridley Scott should put the camera down and enjoy retirement.


I'm still wondering how he managed to fark up Hannibal.
 
2013-06-19 03:52:57 AM
Shouldn't Prometheus 2 be called .... Alien?
 
2013-06-19 03:53:15 AM
I really wanted to like Prometheus. The opening scene with the albino dude creating life or whatever was going on was absolutely beautiful. Then it just turned into a movie filled with unlikable douchebags doing stupid things that made no sense just to further the plot.

I rewatched 'Alien' recently on blu ray. (If you haven't seen the HD version of 'Alien' it is stunning. It looks like it was made yesterday.) Yes it may seem slow in that particular way 70's movies do but it holds up very well. The characters react to the crisis like real human beings.
 
2013-06-19 03:54:14 AM

Altair: GungFu: Stupid film.

Ridley Scott should put the camera down and enjoy retirement.

I'm still wondering how he managed to fark up Hannibal.


To be fair, the book it was based on was pretty awful as well.
 
2013-06-19 04:01:11 AM

Smashed Hat: Altair: GungFu: Stupid film.

Ridley Scott should put the camera down and enjoy retirement.

I'm still wondering how he managed to fark up Hannibal.

To be fair, the book it was based on was pretty awful as well.


Just started Red Dragon recently so I'm that far, yet
 
2013-06-19 04:03:33 AM
There's no Rifftrax for Prometheus yet, so the film is still unsalvageable as any form of entertainment. But charge right on with that sequel, Hollywood! I'm sure you'll get enough repeat viewings out of the twelve people who actually liked that Mad Lib plotted hack job to earn back at least a small percentage of the first film's Vaseline budget.
 
2013-06-19 04:21:51 AM
Altair:

Just started Red Dragon recently so I'm that far, yet


I remember really liking Red Dragon and Silence Of The Lambs but Hannibal felt like it was written strictly out of contractual obligation.
 
2013-06-19 04:28:33 AM
Hey, movie-makers: it's OK to have intelligent characters. They don't even have to be super-smart. Just have them make decently intelligent decisions; their plans can simply go awry, as plans so often do.
 
2013-06-19 04:31:36 AM
static.tvtropes.org
I'M ANGRY AND AGGRESSIVE FOR NO REASON.
 
2013-06-19 04:36:11 AM

MessyDwarf: [static.tvtropes.org image 350x250]
I'M ANGRY AND AGGRESSIVE FOR NO REASON.


He has a reason. He has a lot of tattoos. duh.
 
2013-06-19 04:38:25 AM

MessyDwarf: [static.tvtropes.org image 350x250]
I'M ANGRY AND AGGRESSIVE FOR NO REASON.


Scottish, red head,
 
2013-06-19 04:55:36 AM

Irving Maimway: I read the Alien: Engineers script. I got even more angry. I sold my bluray of Prometheus last week.


I liked what I've read of that script. It seems like it would have been an easier movie to understand. I liked Prometheus - apparently I'm in the minority - but I'll admit that it wasn't easy to follow. The Engineers script, along with this review (highly recommended read) suggest that perhaps Scott thought the Engineers script was too obvious in intent. He wanted to create a movie that told a story through metaphor and subtlety. But I think most of what was going on in the movie just went over the heads of the audience.

People don't like the "people doing stupid things in a horror movie" trope, but it's really not even that bad in Prometheus. Aside from the scene where you're screaming TURN THE OTHER WAY AND AVOID THE GIANT DONUT/SPACESHIP!, I found most of what the crew did to be believable. Did they make mistakes? Sure. But honestly the whole mission was ridiculously flawed. Let's go to a planet we know NOTHING about (terrain, weather, whether a ship could even land there), that may or may not contain sentient life, sending nothing but scientists with a few flamethrowers. It's an incredibly risky, pioneer-type mission that cost a literal fortune. All based on a cave painting. They couldn't be sure that there would be anything even ON the planet, let alone that they would have to go exploring ruins. When you consider the kind of mission it was - a bold, risky and desperate one - it shouldn't be surprising that mistakes were made. They're essentially flying blind - how could they really expect to be perfect?
 
2013-06-19 05:10:38 AM

lacydog: Irving Maimway: I read the Alien: Engineers script. I got even more angry. I sold my bluray of Prometheus last week.

I liked what I've read of that script. It seems like it would have been an easier movie to understand. I liked Prometheus - apparently I'm in the minority - but I'll admit that it wasn't easy to follow. The Engineers script, along with this review (highly recommended read) suggest that perhaps Scott thought the Engineers script was too obvious in intent. He wanted to create a movie that told a story through metaphor and subtlety. But I think most of what was going on in the movie just went over the heads of the audience.

People don't like the "people doing stupid things in a horror movie" trope, but it's really not even that bad in Prometheus. Aside from the scene where you're screaming TURN THE OTHER WAY AND AVOID THE GIANT DONUT/SPACESHIP!, I found most of what the crew did to be believable. Did they make mistakes? Sure. But honestly the whole mission was ridiculously flawed. Let's go to a planet we know NOTHING about (terrain, weather, whether a ship could even land there), that may or may not contain sentient life, sending nothing but scientists with a few flamethrowers. It's an incredibly risky, pioneer-type mission that cost a literal fortune. All based on a cave painting. They couldn't be sure that there would be anything even ON the planet, let alone that they would have to go exploring ruins. When you consider the kind of mission it was - a bold, risky and desperate one - it shouldn't be surprising that mistakes were made. They're essentially flying blind - how could they really expect to be perfect?


Prometheus had many problems; being hard to follow was not one of them. This was not a movie that was too smart for its audience.

It had an implausible storyline compounded by unlikable characters doing implausible things. And Guy Pearce in old guy prosthetic makeup for no reason. It was just a horrible mess and a waste of a great cast.

But I'm sure the sequel will be a delightful romp.
 
2013-06-19 05:31:32 AM

lacydog: I found most of what the crew did to be believable.


Do you actually know and interact with other humans? (*tongue in cheek*)

Seriously, though. The way the characters acted, it's like the writers and directors thought to themselves, "Let's think: how would a person with the slightest amount of common sense act in this situation? Okay, let's make the characters do the exact opposite."

If you think their actions were believable, and if you base this on your experiences with people in real life, then there is a very strong chance that you are surrounded by complete idiots. ;)
 
2013-06-19 05:31:43 AM

lacydog: I liked Prometheus - apparently I'm in the minority


You're just not trendy.  On the internet everything is either FAIL or FULL OF WIN. There is never any middle ground. and the trendy thing when this movie came out was to shiat on every single nitpick the internet could come up with.

That's why you never see anyone say "Prometheus is an enjoyable yet flawed film, full of beautiful visuals and glaring plot holes. Moments where you say "Ah!" and moments where you say "WTF?" and instead see comments like "Prometheus was terribad" and "Stupid Film".
 
2013-06-19 05:39:41 AM
Yeah, but how much Prometheus 1 will it have?
 
2013-06-19 05:41:09 AM

MessyDwarf: [static.tvtropes.org image 350x250]
I'M ANGRY AND AGGRESSIVE FOR NO REASON.


Really, the only character interaction that made sense in that entire film was Idris Elba and Charlize Theron getting bored and f*cking.
 
2013-06-19 05:47:21 AM

log_jammin: lacydog: I liked Prometheus - apparently I'm in the minority

You're just not trendy.  On the internet everything is either FAIL or FULL OF WIN. There is never any middle ground. and the trendy thing when this movie came out was to shiat on every single nitpick the internet could come up with.

That's why you never see anyone say "Prometheus is an enjoyable yet flawed film, full of beautiful visuals and glaring plot holes. Moments where you say "Ah!" and moments where you say "WTF?" and instead see comments like "Prometheus was terribad" and "Stupid Film".


It was a bad film, a very bad film.  It's not so much the netfolk being naturally mired in hyperbole as it is the fact that it's a completely forgettable direct to video schlock fest, created and performed by some of the most talented minds in the film world.  Skinimax dialogue, one dimensional arbitrary characterizations, paint-by-numbers plot that still doesn't hold in real time, let alone retrospect.  And Guy Pearce in 20th century spirit gum-tissue paper oldface for absolutely no reason besides GUYPEARCE.  it was a sh*t film, and there's not enough faux-art relativism in the world to change that.
 
2013-06-19 05:49:57 AM

mamoru: lacydog: I found most of what the crew did to be believable.

Do you actually know and interact with other humans? (*tongue in cheek*)

Seriously, though. The way the characters acted, it's like the writers and directors thought to themselves, "Let's think: how would a person with the slightest amount of common sense act in this situation? Okay, let's make the characters do the exact opposite."

If you think their actions were believable, and if you base this on your experiences with people in real life, then there is a very strong chance that you are surrounded by complete idiots. ;)


I work at a casino for a living, and I was a psych major in college, so I see more flawed reasoning than most I guess. It didn't surprise me that a researcher would take his helmet off - researchers are terribly impulsive and will do terribly risky/irresponsible things if proper guidelines aren't established. I don't know how much you know about the history of research, but there's a lot of rules that go into how you can research things in nature and in human beings. And those rules exist because of famous studies - like say the Stanford Prison Experiment - that showed a reason for those rules to exist.
 
2013-06-19 05:54:28 AM

thamike: It's not so much the netfolk being naturally mired in hyperbole as it is the fact that it's a completely forgettable direct to video schlock fest


Oh you.
 
2013-06-19 06:00:47 AM

lacydog: mamoru: lacydog: I found most of what the crew did to be believable.

Do you actually know and interact with other humans? (*tongue in cheek*)

Seriously, though. The way the characters acted, it's like the writers and directors thought to themselves, "Let's think: how would a person with the slightest amount of common sense act in this situation? Okay, let's make the characters do the exact opposite."

If you think their actions were believable, and if you base this on your experiences with people in real life, then there is a very strong chance that you are surrounded by complete idiots. ;)

I work at a casino for a living, and I was a psych major in college, so I see more flawed reasoning than most I guess. It didn't surprise me that a researcher would take his helmet off - researchers are terribly impulsive and will do terribly risky/irresponsible things if proper guidelines aren't established. I don't know how much you know about the history of research, but there's a lot of rules that go into how you can research things in nature and in human beings. And those rules exist because of famous studies - like say the Stanford Prison Experiment - that showed a reason for those rules to exist.


Did you see the movie based on that experiment with forest Whitaker? Yeah, it sucked just as bad as brometheus
 
2013-06-19 06:04:05 AM

Shenanigans!: Prometheus had many problems; being hard to follow was not one of them. This was not a movie that was too smart for its audience.

It had an implausible storyline compounded by unlikable characters doing implausible things. And Guy Pearce in old guy prosthetic makeup for no reason. It was just a horrible mess and a waste of a great cast


But I'm sure the sequel will be a delightful romp.

I guess I should note that I entirely buy the "lifegiver/Jesus/Prometheus/self-sacrafice versus selfishness angle that was described in the linked article. I don't think most people "got" that out of the film. And that's because Scott was being to obtuse with it - by design. I think it's to the detriment of the film, but I don't think it makes it a *bad* film.

As for the makeup bit... I'll agree to that. No idea why they couldn't just hire someone older. It was a bit jarring. I do think they could have and should have done more with Pearce and Fassbender's characters - the trailers/vignettes they had for the movie were great in that respect (they have Pearce do a TED speech, and an ad for the type of android being sold that Fassbender's android is). I also thought that Theron's character either should have been expanded or dropped.

But I'm legitimately looking forward to a sequel. Partially because it'll likely have a tighter focus - instead of a bunch of characters who aren't fleshed out enough, we'll have Noomi Repace, Michael Fassbender and little else. I think the big problem with Prometheus was that the characters weren't very fleshed out, so when they did things you didn't see those actions as a result of some understandable character flaw, but as mechanisms to the plot. But with less noise and a tighter focus, and a considerable amount of myth to explore and create, there's good stuff to be had.
 
2013-06-19 06:06:40 AM
 
2013-06-19 06:07:38 AM

log_jammin: thamike: It's not so much the netfolk being naturally mired in hyperbole as it is the fact that it's a completely forgettable direct to video schlock fest

Oh you.


Oh yourself.    Ridley Scott farted in the elevator, then let Michael Fassbender walk right into it. The movie sucked and you know it.
 
2013-06-19 06:08:22 AM
Prometheus just doesn't make sense.  Nothing about it makes any sense.  If you were a scientist going to an alien world and woke up with some weird parasite swimming around in your eye, you would not say "eh, i'll walk it off."  If you saw a weird penis snake emerge from a puddle, you would not coo and try to pet the horrid thing.  If you came to the planet because you were really old and hoped that there would be aliens there that might extend your life, you would only feel that this is possible if you woke up from cryostasis to find a bustling world of intelligent, benevolent creatures; if you woke up and found a ravaged wasteland with a single corpselike alien surrounded by malevolent scenery, you would know that it won't happen because that would be like landing in the Congo and asking some mean-looking guerilla clutching a machete to perform open-heart surgery on you.

If you gave birth to a squid baby and locked it in a sterile lab, you wouldn't expect it to grow massive in 12 hours because it has no goddamned food and things can't grow unless they eat.  (Maybe there was a palette of spacefood sticks in the corner?)

If you escaped from a catastrophic nightmare in which you and a robot head were the only survivors after seeing everyone else die horribly from aggressive aliens, and had one chance to return to earth, you would not choose to go the other way to find more aggressive aliens to ask why they're dicks.  No one would do that.

Most of all, if you start to make a movie that seems to promise something thoughtful as opposed to just a horde of rampaging scary alien baddies, you don't replace that with... uhh... a singular not-scary alien baddie.  Grrr!  He's grumpy!

I could go on.  But it's coffee time.
 
2013-06-19 06:09:30 AM

thamike: MessyDwarf: [static.tvtropes.org image 350x250]
I'M ANGRY AND AGGRESSIVE FOR NO REASON.

Really, the only character interaction that made sense in that entire film was Idris Elba and Charlize Theron getting bored and f*cking.


Wait, what?  I've not seen the movie, but WHY IS THIS THE FIRST I'VE HEARD OF THIS?!

(note to self to do some web searches for the scene after work)
 
2013-06-19 06:09:34 AM

lacydog: I work at a casino for a living, and I was a psych major in college


That's insufferability squared!
 
2013-06-19 06:11:43 AM

Alphax: Wait, what? I've not seen the movie, but WHY IS THIS THE FIRST I'VE HEARD OF THIS?!


Off screen.  in fact, it's hard to tell if that was in the script or it was behind the scenes footage of Theron and Elba realizing where the script was heading.
 
2013-06-19 06:11:46 AM

thamike: The movie sucked and you know it.


Like I said, I enjoyed it.

It wasn't Alien/s by any means, but it wasn't Transformers either. Or a "completely forgettable direct to video schlock fest", such as say..."Transmorphers".

Hyperbole is contagious. You should see a doctor.
 
2013-06-19 06:12:25 AM
You don't see Idris and Charlize fark.  They just say "let's fark" and then go off somewhere.
 
2013-06-19 06:12:52 AM

Alphax: note to self to do some web searches for the scene after work)


It's off screen unfortunately.
 
2013-06-19 06:13:10 AM

thamike: Alphax: Wait, what? I've not seen the movie, but WHY IS THIS THE FIRST I'VE HEARD OF THIS?!

Off screen.  in fact, it's hard to tell if that was in the script or it was behind the scenes footage of Theron and Elba realizing where the script was heading.


Doh!
 
2013-06-19 06:18:37 AM

MessyDwarf: [static.tvtropes.org image 350x250]
I'M ANGRY AND AGGRESSIVE FOR NO REASON.


img.fark.net

I AM A COLD CLINICAL ANDROID WHO MAKES
DECISIONS BASED ON PRIMAL HUMAN EMOTION
FOR NO REASON.


img.fark.net

I'M A VIOLENT CORPORATIST ICE QUEEN, FOR NO REASON.

img.fark.net

WE ARE ALL COMPLETELY UNQUALIFIED, FOR ANY OF THIS.

img.fark.net

HERE'S GUY PEARCE, FOR NO REASON.
 
2013-06-19 06:18:46 AM
I saw this last night for the first time. It's as bad as everyone says.
 
2013-06-19 06:22:24 AM

log_jammin: thamike: The movie sucked and you know it.

Like I said, I enjoyed it.

It wasn't Alien/s by any means, but it wasn't Transformers either. Or a "completely forgettable direct to video schlock fest", such as say..."Transmorphers".

Hyperbole is contagious. You should see a doctor.


Completely forgettable schlock fest isn't hyperbole, and it would have been direct to video without Scott and the Alien franchise.  It was actually a perfect example of bad writing.  I'll guarantee you there are professors using Prometheus to show writers what not to do.  The reason why people are angry that it sucked, is because it leveraged its shiattiness on  Alien.  It was a moviegoer version of getting pickpocketed.
 
2013-06-19 06:34:56 AM

thamike: Completely forgettable schlock fest isn't hyperbole, and it would have been direct to video without Scott and the Alien franchise.


without scott and the franchise I doubt it would have been made at all. The studios aren't interested in stand alone films. It's all about name recognition of the franchise.

thamike: The reason why people are angry that it sucked, is because it leveraged its shiattiness on  Alien.  It was a moviegoer version of getting pickpocketed.


I guess those people forgot about alien 3, alien 4, AvP, AvP: R, all the piss poor video games, etc...

You'd think those people would have a little perspective on shiattiness by now.
 
2013-06-19 06:40:36 AM
img.fark.net
Captain Amelia:
[to a protesting Doppler] Let me make this as... monosyllabic as possible. I... don't much care for this crew you hired. They're...
[to Arrow]
Captain Amelia: how did I describe them, Arrow? I said something rather good this morning before coffee.
Mr. Arrow: 'A ludicrous parcel of driveling galoots,' ma'am.
Captain Amelia: [to Doppler] There you go, poetry.
 
2013-06-19 06:43:26 AM
I think this is a step in the wrong direction.  As long as we're making high-budget B movies, why not go full terribad?  Needs moar Tommy Wiseau.
 
2013-06-19 06:45:57 AM

log_jammin: I guess those people forgot about alien 3, alien 4, AvP, AvP: R, all the piss poor video games, etc...

You'd think those people would have a little perspective on shiattiness by now.


1: None of those ever happened. There were only two "Alien"* movies made. You've forgotten your meds again.
2: Ridley Scott was not involved in any of those hallucinations of yours.

*And "Aliens" only counts because it's fun enough that you don't mind the parts that suck.
 
2013-06-19 06:46:45 AM
I LOVE Prometheus!!! I can't until the story continues. Likers are gonna like.
 
2013-06-19 07:00:16 AM
static.tvtropes.org
I'M ANGRY AND AGGRESSIVE FOR NO REASON. I'M A COMPLETE FEISTY DICK, BUT LITTLE-GIRL SCARED OF DEAD, HEADLESS GIANTS. I CAN'T FOLLOW MY OWN MAPS, AND HAVE A shiat POOR SENSE OF DIRECTION. I WAS HIRED TO BE A GEOLOGIST... ALTHOUGH THE ACTUAL MISSION HAD NO GEOLOGIC PARAMETERS. I SHOULDN'T EVEN BE HERE...

www.flixist.com

farm8.staticflickr.com
No Problem - I can just outrun this...
 
2013-06-19 07:06:23 AM

lacydog: I guess I should note that I entirely buy the "lifegiver/Jesus/Prometheus/self-sacrafice versus selfishness angle that was described in the linked article. I don't think most people "got" that out of the film. And that's because Scott was being to obtuse with it - by design. I think it's to the detriment of the film, but I don't think it makes it a *bad* film.


I have to disagree with you there.  It was pretty obvious what Ridley Scott wanted judging by that hamfisted attempt at a Jesus scene where David washes Weyland's feet.

I'm like you, I want to like the movie.  I love Scott's other work.  But on rewatching....this is where I gave up on Prometheus.
 
Displayed 50 of 173 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report