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(Salon)   Republicans develop plan to appeal to millenials: make gay marriage and abortion funny   (salon.com) divider line 109
    More: Amusing, social conservatism, youth vote, abortions  
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4981 clicks; posted to Politics » on 17 Jun 2013 at 2:20 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-06-17 12:39:34 PM
14 votes:
You know who has extremely low abortion rates?

Gay people.
2013-06-17 01:14:40 PM
10 votes:

jbc: RodneyToady: "How do you make abortion funny?"

Clown abortions?

Two aborted babies walk into a bar. The bartender says "Fetus?" The first baby says "Fetus? Damn near killed us!"



You're forgetting that they're going to be using Republican humor.

"A woman goes into Planned Parenthood.  So I made a billboard of the little slut's address and telephone number, and then shot her doctor."
2013-06-17 12:35:45 PM
10 votes:
"I do not believe we should sacrifice our values to win elections," Koroson said.

Then you'll sacrifice elections to keep your antiquated values.
2013-06-17 12:28:10 PM
10 votes:
But they've still not figured out that if you're trying to trick people into voting for you then you've already lost.
2013-06-17 12:32:13 PM
9 votes:
Because if there's one thing young folks respond to, it's "jokes" by religious groups trying to be hip and relevant.
2013-06-17 01:07:30 PM
8 votes:
Travis Korson, the Grassroots Director of the Virginia chapter, suggested framing marriage as an economic issue. "Gay marriage undermines that basic family unit," he said, and that, in turn, hurts the economy.

Yes, because when I'm walking down the street in Portland's gay (well, gay-er) district, past the thriving boutiques, upscale bars, gourmet restaurants, art galleries, renovated condos, and design firms, the streets lined with new BMWs, Mini-Coopers, and Priuses, my first thought is, "man, these gays sure are hurting the economy."
2013-06-17 10:46:17 PM
5 votes:

quizzical: Will people please stop linking these unfunny comics?  I'm afraid that the authors will start thinking they've done something right with their lives when they see their bandwidth spike today.


If Fark is giving them a page views spike, I say "good." That means they'll look up where everyone is hotlinking from, read this thread, and I can say this directly:

If you want to minimize abortion in the United States, you have to do two things; Promote comprehensive, fact-based sex education for all teenagers, and support universal health care for all women, including contraception. Nothing else is going to work at all.

You're welcome.
2013-06-17 02:59:00 PM
5 votes:

serial_crusher: The big problem with that method though, is that you get fuddy duddies on both sides who get offended by the crudity of the humor and ignore the message that comes with it. You're right that it's a byproduct of the black-and-white mentality. You have to either be unfunny or go to ridiculous hyperbole, because you live in a world of extremes. I don't see that as a flaw of the comedians though, but just the audience being unable to put the offensiveness of a joke aside.


The audience is fine. Louis CK, for instance, is incredibly popular and his brand of comedy is hardly tame. The problem with South Park is that it just isn't that good.
2013-06-17 02:50:24 PM
5 votes:

Somacandra: Raharu: Have you never read hope and change comics?
Here's today's strip.

I don't get it. Is the joke supposed to be that she wants more children and Barack is infertile? Or that Barack is not the father of his own children? Or what? Or that she's secretly gay and hates penises but loves kids? Seriously--what is the joke supposed to be?


Cargo Cult Humor.

They see "libs" laughing at jokes about Rev. Ted Haggard or Sen. Larry Craig being caught with a dick in their mouth, so they try their own version.  They think the humor is that they're gay, not that the humor comes from them being massive hypocrites, railing against "perverted" homosexuals while engaging in the skankiest of gay sex: gloryhole blowjobs, or sex with a male prostitute while high on meth, something that even most gay men find sleazy and disgusting.
2013-06-17 03:17:48 PM
4 votes:

OdradekRex: What's the difference between the GOP religious right and the Taliban?


The Taliban wears beards and the GOP marries them.
2013-06-17 02:25:46 PM
4 votes:

Somacandra: sweetmelissa31: In other news, there is a comic strip less funny than Mallard Filmore.

[i.imgur.com image 342x477]

The last time I saw my Mom, she "spit an egg" at me!

So I got up and left the "WOMB!"

LAUGHTER OL


"A Baby's Womb".

This is what  the right wing thinks of women.
2013-06-17 12:51:15 PM
4 votes:
"You can engage with sarcasm, it's hard with the abortion issue, but you have to," said Students for Life President Kristan Hawkins

Maybe she can combine it with a rape joke.  The GOP is good at those.
2013-06-17 03:02:43 PM
3 votes:
What these idiots do not realize, is that unless you keep up on current events closely, every day, you will not get the jokes on The Daily Show or the Colbert Report.

Dumbass teabaggers think liberals get their news from those shows, when it is exactly the opposite.
2013-06-17 02:59:10 PM
3 votes:
The key to humor is truth. This is why the GOP will never have a sense of humor.
2013-06-17 02:43:50 PM
3 votes:

what_now: Who the fark is writing these jokes? Hodor?


At least Hodor has comedic timing.
2013-06-17 02:41:56 PM
3 votes:
Who the fark is writing these jokes? Hodor?
2013-06-17 02:39:25 PM
3 votes:

Somacandra: Seriously--what is the joke supposed to be?


Right wing humor is clearly too sophisticated for you.

Seriously though, there's a reason why 99% of comedians are left-wingers. Comedy requires subtlety, which requires a viewpoint capable of distinguishing shades of gray. If you see everything in absolutist terms you cannot write a joke.
2013-06-17 02:39:00 PM
3 votes:
This is going to backfire horribly. When you start out only two steps from a rape joke, it's not going to take you long to just stumble there. Especially these guys.
2013-06-17 02:36:04 PM
3 votes:

Aarontology: Because if there's one thing young folks respond to, it's "jokes" by religious groups trying to be hip and relevant.


They need to talk to this guy:

3.bp.blogspot.com
2013-06-17 02:35:35 PM
3 votes:
Yeah! Then we'll get the youth pastor to wear jeans and put product in his hair and learn three chords on the guitar! It's a f*cking lock!

Guys, this is just the time in western society when we swing the needle back towards Secular Humanism for awhile. Sit it out for a generation or two. I PROMISE you that when the inevitable ennui settles in, somebody will look you up in the phone book and you can get dialed back in for a little while.
2013-06-17 02:29:31 PM
3 votes:

Sgt Otter: There is a whole series of these.


i668.photobucket.com
2013-06-17 02:24:04 PM
3 votes:
Sorry about that, Millenials or Gen Y or whatever you want to call yourselves.

We thought if us Gen X folks removed ourselves from the bullshiat games of the Boomers and "Greatest Generation", people would realize the idiocy of it all and focus on making the world a better place, but we farked up in that department.  Apathy is sometimes detrimental.

/get off my lawn
//pass the beer and bong
2013-06-17 02:03:51 PM
3 votes:
Yeah, you should make jokes while you're picketing outside a Planned Parenthood; that'll really go over well. That girl will really change her mind when you start telling jokes about something she's spent weeks agonizing over. Then make sure to slut shame her, too.

The best part is that during that whole day, you've probably only yelled at two women who were getting abortions. But women like me love being handed baby booties when I'm going to get a papsmear.
2013-06-17 01:28:50 PM
3 votes:
Travis Korson, the Grassroots Director of the Virginia chapter, suggested framing marriage as an economic issue. "Gay marriage undermines that basic family unit," he said, and that, in turn, hurts the economy.

This person doesn't believe this, but thinks you are incredibly stupid.
2013-06-17 12:32:07 PM
3 votes:

RodneyToady: "How do you make abortion funny?"

Clown abortions?


Only if it's during the 1st piemester
2013-06-17 09:16:37 PM
2 votes:
Conservative humor kind of reminds me of contemporary Christian music.
24.media.tumblr.com
2013-06-17 08:04:37 PM
2 votes:
Great.  Another piece about how the Republican party wizards think all they need to do is some "re-branding."  No awareness at all that their support is eroding due to their terrible policies, hateful rhetoric, and obeisance to the worst of the nutball right.
2013-06-17 07:06:11 PM
2 votes:

Hickory-smoked: In all honestly, the "Umbert" comics don't strike me as evil. The logic is terrible and myopic, the jokes aren't actually jokes, and there is a weird tendency to view women as passive incubators... but aside from thatit's pretty tame.


I've bolded the part that's pretty goddamn evil. Just because it's not *malicious* doesn't mean it's not evil.

"Down there - he said - are people who will follow any dragon, worship any god, ignore any inequity. All out of a kind of humdrum, everyday badness. Not the really high, creative loathsomeness of the great sinners, but a sort of mass-produced darkness of the soul. Sin, you might say, without a trace of originality. They accept evil not because they say yes, but because they don't say no."  -Havelock Vetinari, from Terry Pratchett's Guards! Guards!

Also:

"There is a very interesting debate raging at the moment about the nature of sin, for example," said Oats.
"And what do they think? Against it, are they?" said Granny Weatherwax.
"It's not as simple as that. It's not a black and white issue. There are so many shades of gray."
"Nope."
"Pardon?"
"There's no grays, only white that's got grubby. I'm surprised you don't know that. And sin, young man, is when you treat people as things. Including yourself. That's what sin is."
"It's a lot more complicated than that-"
"No. It ain't. When people say things are a lot more complicated than that, they means they're getting worried that they won't like the truth. People as things, that's where it starts."
"Oh, I'm sure there are worse crimes-"
"But they starts with thinking about people as things..."

(From Carpe Jugulum)
2013-06-17 06:01:56 PM
2 votes:

AnonAmbientLight: I guess i should e-mail my professor and tell him Random McFarkGuy says his wrong.


I said, you CANNOT bind someone who is not party to the contract.  If  I create a contract which says my friend can be on my insurance plan at the discounted family rate, that contract is unenforceable against the insurance company.  The insurance company is not party to the contract.  It has no power to force the insurance company to do anything.  Marriage has a whole slew of benefits that are conferred by third parties, none of whom would be bound under the scheme proposed by your professor.

It's nice you like your professor, but don't think just because he says something you happen to agree with, and just because you took one class, you suddenly have all the knowledge you need to solve a social issue that's been around for a while.
2013-06-17 03:51:40 PM
2 votes:

HotWingConspiracy: We can all laugh now, but I give us about two election cycles before these people start shooting.


I will enjoy watching them be shot and burned. A Waco a week for a couple months would put these retards where they belong.
2013-06-17 03:38:37 PM
2 votes:

sweetmelissa31: Is this an argument for opening our borders?

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 342x477]


That argument is so retarded I want to argue for the ethics of aborting it.
2013-06-17 03:23:05 PM
2 votes:
We can all laugh now, but I give us about two election cycles before these people start shooting.
2013-06-17 02:42:09 PM
2 votes:

Cantankerous Gnome: Hey, do any of you farkers posting Umbert the Unborn have the expressed written permission of Gary Cangemi?


Considering nobody's posting these to make a profit, and a lot of people are being exposed to his work for the first time, I'm thinking it's going to get him more attention and increase his viewer base.  That said, he's free to request a takedown, to which I'm sure the Farkers-That-Be will approve.
2013-06-17 02:42:02 PM
2 votes:

Cantankerous Gnome: Hey, do any of you farkers posting Umbert the Unborn have the expressed written permission of Gary Cangemi?


Fair use includes cultural commentary, analysis and education. Plus you can never reach Cary. He's always got his head stuck up some preggo chick's coont for research.
2013-06-17 02:40:47 PM
2 votes:
Oh goody.  Humor? This means some GOP apparatchik is ordering his secretary to dust off her Rolodex and call the comedic geniuses who created the 1/2 Hour News Hour.

That was some top talent, dude.

www.mediabistro.com

Top. Men.
2013-06-17 02:39:30 PM
2 votes:
At best, Republicans are funny unintentionally, and usually that involves us laughing AT them. Their deliberate attempts at humor are about as funny as a pancreatic cancer diagnosis. I look forward to their attempts at courting my vote. How sweet the desperation is.
2013-06-17 02:37:37 PM
2 votes:

Dear GOP:

DOOOOOOOOOOOO IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTT.



/It will shame your families if you don't!
//Do it, do it, do it...
2013-06-17 02:37:07 PM
2 votes:

ALL GIRLS AGREE TO PULL PANTIES DOWN: Sgt Otter: God Is My Co-Pirate: This is going to be "Poochie says abortions are hilarious to the max, dude!" isn't it?

[www.ncregister.com image 342x468]

There is a whole series of these.

[prolifescranton.org image 734x554]

Worst.  Pride Float.  Ever.

ih0.redbubble.net
2013-06-17 02:31:53 PM
2 votes:

Raharu: Have you never read hope and change comics?
Here's today's strip.


I don't get it. Is the joke supposed to be that she wants more children and Barack is infertile? Or that Barack is not the father of his own children? Or what? Or that she's secretly gay and hates penises but loves kids? Seriously--what is the joke supposed to be?
2013-06-17 02:31:50 PM
2 votes:
Liberty University senior class president Chelsea Patterson offered that "a lot of my peers see the GOP as kind of old school," suggesting the party needed some rebranding and a better strategy of connecting with popular culture.

Repackage the same old policy positions? Hey, nobody's suggested that before. Maybe it'll work!

Hawkins said it was because the party was too moderate. "We keep nominating moderates and saying we need a big tent, but we keep losing."

Yes! The GOP needs to go even further right! It's the only way!

No one suggested changing any positions, only finding better packaging for the ones they already have. "I do not believe we should sacrifice our values to win elections," Koroson said.

Repackage the same old policy positions? Hey, nobody's suggested that before. Maybe it'll work!

--

These are the young, visionary, forward thinkers of the social conservative movement. Presumably. Nary a new idea among them.
2013-06-17 02:29:31 PM
2 votes:

sweetmelissa31: Sgt Otter: There is a whole series of these.



This Mom was apparently getting around.

In other news, there is a comic strip less funny than Mallard Filmore.


This fetus comic has yet to give Jews big crooked noses and call Jon Stewart a child molester.
2013-06-17 02:28:41 PM
2 votes:

bujin: /midget abortions, on the other hand....


Actually, neither are those, because a lot of little people end up having to get abortions to save the mom's life.
2013-06-17 02:07:06 PM
2 votes:

Sgt Otter: www.ncregister.com

There is a whole series of these.


Goddammit, that is so unfunny I just forgot several funny things I used to know.
2013-06-17 01:54:54 PM
2 votes:

Nabb1: Ask Sarah Silverman how abortion jokes tend to go over.


To be fair, her normal jokes go the same way.
2013-06-17 01:41:04 PM
2 votes:
This is going to be "Poochie says abortions are hilarious to the max, dude!" isn't it?
2013-06-17 01:31:53 PM
2 votes:

Relatively Obscure: Travis Korson, the Grassroots Director of the Virginia chapter, suggested framing marriage as an economic issue. "Gay marriage undermines that basic family unit," he said, and that, in turn, hurts the economy.

This person doesn't believe this, but thinks you are incredibly stupid.


I don't know man, what about all those gays having children they can't afford and going on welfare?
2013-06-17 12:52:30 PM
2 votes:

RodneyToady: Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get an abortion.


Why did the conservative politician cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in a chicken.
2013-06-17 12:44:03 PM
2 votes:
I always thought there should be an aborted fetus superhero called the Miscarriage of Justice
2013-06-17 10:09:03 PM
1 votes:

RodneyToady: "How do you make abortion funny?"

Clown abortions?


25.media.tumblr.com
2013-06-17 09:09:19 PM
1 votes:
Abortion is a funny issue.

You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little farked up maybe, but it's funny how, I mean funny like abortion is a clown, it amuses you? It makes you laugh, it's here to farkin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How is it funny?
2013-06-17 07:54:21 PM
1 votes:

Parthenogenetic: He's not much worse than Matt Groening, who's enjoyed a fair amount of success.  It was the subject matter.


That's an interesting observation. I'd have to say you're right. My only question, though, is who in the hell is Matt Groening?

/Kidding.
//Seriously, though...Ted Rall's an asshole.
2013-06-17 07:18:45 PM
1 votes:

Hickory-smoked: The "HopeNChange" strips, on the other hand, appear to be based entirely on paranoia, spite and bigotry.


And made up shiat.  Don't forget all the made up shiat.
2013-06-17 07:08:24 PM
1 votes:
Will people please stop linking these unfunny comics?  I'm afraid that the authors will start thinking they've done something right with their lives when they see their bandwidth spike today.
2013-06-17 06:30:50 PM
1 votes:

Satanic_Hamster: Hawkins said it was because the party was too moderate. "We keep nominating moderates and saying we need a big tent, but we keep losing."

Yeah, that's why you keep losing dudes.  It's because your candidates are "too moderate."  Here's the thing, no one outside of your closed social group thought Romney was a moderate.


The funny thing is that the closest that Romney got to beating Obama was after the 1st debate when he started to run frantically to the center.

It was only after he started to appease to his base again did the gap grew bigger and bigger.

Same thing happened with McCain, he was running close to Obama for the beginning half of the election cycle but once he decided to appease to his base by picking Palin to run as VP, his polling numbers started to tank.

But as long as the GOP doesn't learn this lesson, the less likely they will win in the future.
2013-06-17 06:02:36 PM
1 votes:
Man, I thought some of the online comics I read have bad days... the closest I came to a laugh at any picture posted here was the Spiderman pic. Those comics are farking awful.
2013-06-17 05:51:11 PM
1 votes:

RyogaM: AnonAmbientLight: So what's the point. Get government out of the marriage business other than recognizing and enforcing contracts.

A contract cannot bind a non-adhering third party to take or refrain from an act.  Marriage law can and does this regularly.  Don't take a philosophy class to understand law, go to law school and take a class on family law.


It was a Philosophy of Law class actually. So you're suggesting that i mean to say that you can bind someone that is not willing to be apart of a contract? What kind of contracts are you thinking of?

I guess i should e-mail my professor and tell him Random McFarkGuy says his wrong.
2013-06-17 05:42:59 PM
1 votes:
As discussed in my Philosophy class last semester, this whole debate on gay marriage and marriage equality is missing the key underlying point.

This ENTIRE debate is a waste of time. The reason being is that the government should NOT have a say in marriage AT ALL. None. It is an overreaching and unnecessary intrusion. Consider this. Originally, you could only marry people of your own race. Then, they changed it to allow that. Now we're going towards allowing same sex marriage. At this point, there's no reason to not allow multiple wives or husbands, because that would be the next logical step.

Marriage is a contract. Nothing more. Nothing less. In practice you can actually gain all the benefits of marriage through setting up contracts and legal documents. If you wanted to, you can gain all the benefits of marriage, with your friend, by setting up a contract. You can gain all the benefits of marriage with five people if you wanted to, by setting up a contract(shared bank accounts, property, power of attorney etc). The contract is then enforced by the courts. Done.

So what's the point. Get government out of the marriage business other than recognizing and enforcing contracts.
2013-06-17 05:42:31 PM
1 votes:
Too late, O Republican Party:

i78.photobucket.com

TEArell: The facts of life... to make a radical alteration in the evolvement of an American political party is fatal. A coding sequence cannot be revised once it's been established.
GOP Batty: Why not?
TEArell: Because by the second mid-term of incubation, any cells that have undergone TEA Party reversion mutation give rise to revertant colonies, like rats leaving a sinking ship; then the ship... sinks.
GOP Batty: What about EMS-3 Moderate recombination?
TEArell: We've already tried it - Huntsman, Collins, Snowe, Brown, Lugar......; it created a virus so lethal the subject was dead before it even left the table.
GOP Batty: Then a RINO repressor protein that would block the operating cells.
TEArell: Wouldn't obstruct replication; but it does give rise to an error in replication, so that the newly formed DNA strand carries with it a TEA Party mutation - and you've got a virus again... but this, all of this is academic. You were made as well as we could make you.
GOP Batty: But not to last.
TEArell: The light that burns twice as bright burns for half as long - and you have burned so very, very brightly, GOP. Look at you: you're the Prodigal Son; you're quite a prize!
GOP Batty: I've done... questionable things.
TEArell: Also extraordinary things; revel in your time.
GOP Batty: Nothing the God of Politics wouldn't let you into heaven for.
2013-06-17 05:28:08 PM
1 votes:

WizardofToast: There's one really lazy liberal comic which is just Calvin and Hobbes with all the political messages and none of the humor.


Prickly City.  Terrible.  Awfully drawn.

But if think it's "liberal" you should read it from the early days (Not that I'd wish that on my worst enemy!)   It's swung all over the place, almost as much as Dixiecrats and Republicans.  I think the cartoonist just wants to be "edgy" and "speak truth to power".

It just comes off as forced and lame.
2013-06-17 05:20:30 PM
1 votes:
www.voicescarryblog.com

/late to the party
2013-06-17 04:27:45 PM
1 votes:

serial_crusher: Gunther: Somacandra: Seriously--what is the joke supposed to be?

Right wing humor is clearly too sophisticated for you.

Seriously though, there's a reason why 99% of comedians are left-wingers. Comedy requires subtlety, which requires a viewpoint capable of distinguishing shades of gray. If you see everything in absolutist terms you cannot write a joke.

i think the successful formula for right wing humor is that it has to be slightly offensive.  Take the South Park episode with Christopher Reeve for example.  It would be a stretch to call South Park a right wing show in general--they pretty much make fun of everything--but that particular episode resonates with common right wing views.  The whole thing is about Christopher Reeve killing fetuses for personal gain and becoming a super villain in the process.  The way he snaps the fetuses' necks to suck the stem cells out really drives home the supposed vileness of what he's doing.  That's how political humor should work.  Make people laugh, but also get them thinking.


The depiction of Christopher Reeve was so over-the-top, I thought it was a parody of conservatives' perception of the stem-cell debate.
2013-06-17 04:13:41 PM
1 votes:
The GOP and the Gay Marriage issue:

www.donquijote.cc
2013-06-17 04:05:46 PM
1 votes:
The trouble with conservative humor is that their idea of "political correctness" has expanded to included pretty much any basic social protocol.

There's a self-satisfied assumption that as long as SOMEBODY is pissed off at the end, that proves that what you said or did was both funny and brave.
2013-06-17 03:58:12 PM
1 votes:

sweetmelissa31: Is this an argument for opening our borders?

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 342x477]


It's an argument for drinking. Lots and lots of drinking.
2013-06-17 03:44:39 PM
1 votes:

Satanic_Hamster: Raharu: Yes, even the dogs.

img850.imageshack.us

I don't know what's worse; that someone made that, or that someone made it, looked at it, and still decided to post that on the internet.  Not only is it not funny, the quality of the artwork is just horrible.



It's a actually improved, you should see some of his older works.

img849.imageshack.us

Here's the commentary:
Yes, everyone is getting "wee-wee'ed up" with planning for Barack Hussein Obama's second inauguration next week, and every detail is getting keen attention - unlike any policy decisions which happened during the president's first term.

As one of the festive highlights, the most racist and race-baiting president of modern times will take the oath of office with his hand placed on the Bible of Republican and civil rights icon Martin Luther King Jr who, if alive today, would surely raise his face to the heavens and say, "why the hell does the president have a predator drone circling me?"

Because Obama repudiates the legacy of Dr. King with every action he takes, and wants a colorblind society about as much as he wants to pay for his own vacations.

Which perhaps explains why the ceremony in which Barry uses King's Bible will be a complete charade: because his actual swearing in will take place 24 hours earlier in a private ceremony using a Bible from Michelle's family which is probably not a Koran.

But instead of going back to work on Monday, all sworn in and promising to defend the Constitution, Barry wants the pomp and circumstance of a huge and expensive public spectacle which has no legal validity whatsoever.

One in which he can trade on the legacy of Dr. King (despite having a cabinet which is stunningly lacking in diversity) and hobnob with people of all races, creeds, and colors...as long as they're exceedingly famous and stinking rich ("special VIP access" rewards are granted to individuals and evil corporations based on the size of their bribes, er, contributions beginning at $10,000 and costing as much as $1 million for complete access to the president's balls. Which we presume are Inaugural Balls, but you never know.)

Ambassador Chris Stevens is not expected to attend.
2013-06-17 03:43:36 PM
1 votes:

Satanic_Hamster: Raharu: Yes, even the dogs.

img850.imageshack.us

I don't know what's worse; that someone made that, or that someone made it, looked at it, and still decided to post that on the internet.  Not only is it not funny, the quality of the artwork is just horrible.


There is this godawful cartoonist I shoved out of my mind. He drew in black and white and everyone looked like they were farking melting. The only character to not look like that, ironically, was the guy from Indiana Jones who got his face melted during the opening of the Ark (which was used for some stupid political joke).
2013-06-17 03:40:36 PM
1 votes:

sweetmelissa31: Is this an argument for opening our borders?

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 342x477]


These people are a dangerous combination of evil and stupid.
2013-06-17 03:38:07 PM
1 votes:
Hawkins said it was because the party was too moderate. "We keep nominating moderates and saying we need a big tent, but we keep losing."

Yeah, that's why you keep losing dudes.  It's because your candidates are "too moderate."  Here's the thing, no one outside of your closed social group thought Romney was a moderate.
2013-06-17 03:33:42 PM
1 votes:
I always liked this conservative humor:

www.morethings.com

But they were happy to make fun of themselves.
2013-06-17 03:23:45 PM
1 votes:

Raharu: [img211.imageshack.us image 800x392]


Here's the Commentary for that comic:


The commentary is hilarious, though completely inadvertently. I imagine a large puddle of drool collecting on his desk as he typed this.
2013-06-17 03:23:09 PM
1 votes:
George Carlin knew how to make abortion funny, but I don't think this is what the Republicans had in mind:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AvF1Q3UidWM
2013-06-17 03:18:02 PM
1 votes:
test.axisofweevil.com
2013-06-17 03:15:15 PM
1 votes:

Raharu: Serious Black: Raharu: [img198.imageshack.us image 850x409]

[img844.imageshack.us image 800x389]

[img37.imageshack.us image 640x309]

[img21.imageshack.us image 800x390]

I have to admit that the rare abortion one made me chuckle. For about a second.


Here's the artists Commentary on that particular comic.

 When asked about the nightmarish horrors of Dr. Kermit Gosnell's abortion clinic, the president (who has previously advocated killing infants who are born alive after a failed abortion) said that he couldn't talk about a legal matter which was unresolved but, like Bill Clinton, he believe that abortions should be "safe, legal, and rare."Hope n' Change was baffled by what meaning of "rare" he could be referring to, until Mrs. Jarlsberg explained that the dog-eating Mr. Soetoro was  probably using a culinary term.


So the comic's premise is based entirely on the artist having to play dumb to pretend he doesn't understand the meaning of a commonly used, four letter, one syllable English word, in order to make Obama look stupid.
2013-06-17 03:06:45 PM
1 votes:
said Students for Life president Kristan Hawkins ... on how to win millennial voters. "Unfortunately we have to, because this is the generation that we've been dealt."

Gotta love young Republicans trying to win over their peers by displaying contempt for them.
2013-06-17 03:05:23 PM
1 votes:

Biological Ali: . The problem with South Park is that it just isn't that good.


And yet it is probably the closest thing you can find to quality right-wing humor. Despite not really being THAT funny or THAT right wing.

I don't know, I guess it's possible that I as a left-winger just don't appreciate right-wing humor. Perhaps "Umbert the Unborn" is the new Calvin and Hobbes.
2013-06-17 03:05:17 PM
1 votes:

nmrsnr: Dead baby joke thread?

/what's the difference between an abortion and sand?



No right winger has ever secretly got the sand out of her vagina.
2013-06-17 02:48:58 PM
1 votes:

Fuggin Bizzy: sweetmelissa31: In other news, there is a comic strip less funny than Mallard Filmore.

Yeah, "Umbert" is pretty shiatty as cartoons go. Even his name sucks. It's (probably) a ripoff of "Dilbert," because "-berts" are funny. Why the "Um-" prefix though? It rhymes with "Un-" as in "unborn." Kinda. I guess.

/Dilbert's dog was originally going to be named "Dildog," but the publishing syndicate nixed that idea. True story.


Maybe for 'umbilical'? Who knows...
2013-06-17 02:47:10 PM
1 votes:

Aarontology: You know who has extremely low abortion rates?

Gay people.


No, Gay doctors are the ones performing the abortions.

encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
2013-06-17 02:46:51 PM
1 votes:

Fuggin Bizzy: Liberty University senior class president Chelsea Patterson offered that "a lot of my peers see the GOP as kind of old school," suggesting the party needed some rebranding and a better strategy of connecting with popular culture.

Repackage the same old policy positions? Hey, nobody's suggested that before. Maybe it'll work!

Hawkins said it was because the party was too moderate. "We keep nominating moderates and saying we need a big tent, but we keep losing."

Yes! The GOP needs to go even further right! It's the only way!

No one suggested changing any positions, only finding better packaging for the ones they already have. "I do not believe we should sacrifice our values to win elections," Koroson said.

Repackage the same old policy positions? Hey, nobody's suggested that before. Maybe it'll work!

--

These are the young, visionary, forward thinkers of the social conservative movement. Presumably. Nary a new idea among them.


It might be because they still let an old book written by a tribe of sheep farkers dictate their life. And then there's that whole bible thing.
2013-06-17 02:46:10 PM
1 votes:

Cantankerous Gnome: Hey, do any of you farkers posting Umbert the Unborn have the expressed written permission of Gary Cangemi?


THE Gary Cangemi?
2013-06-17 02:44:30 PM
1 votes:

Somacandra: Raharu: Have you never read hope and change comics?
Here's today's strip.

I don't get it. Is the joke supposed to be that she wants more children and Barack is infertile? Or that Barack is not the father of his own children? Or what? Or that she's secretly gay and hates penises but loves kids? Seriously--what is the joke supposed to be?


I believe the author is trying to challenge the stereotype of black males as having large penii by implying that Michelle would have preferred to continue having sexual relations with her turkey baster instead of it dumping her when she got pregnant.
2013-06-17 02:39:42 PM
1 votes:

Aarontology: You know who has extremely low abortion rates?


Countries where abortion is legal?

(Oh wait, I'm sorry. Not supposed to bring facts into this.)
2013-06-17 02:38:43 PM
1 votes:

Lunchlady: Lunchlady: nmrsnr: Dead baby joke thread?

/what's the difference between an abortion and sand?

I guess it has to be me.

Why?

Errrr. What?


I'm guessing it's something about getting stuff in or out of your vagina.
2013-06-17 02:38:28 PM
1 votes:

Target Builder: "How do you make abortion funny?"

I do hope they run with this one.

Sgt Otter:

[www.ncregister.com image 342x468]

There is a whole series of these.

It's pretty impressive how they manage to completely remove the woman from the comic.


A lot of abortion cartoons depict the mother as either satanically evil, absolutely silent while other characters speak for her, or forced to abort by evil strawmen. It's terrible.
2013-06-17 02:37:39 PM
1 votes:
Dear rightwing,

Get back to me when you develop the ability to be funny about anything.
2013-06-17 02:37:22 PM
1 votes:

Fark It: No one suggested changing any positions, only finding better packaging for the ones they already have. "I do not believe we should sacrifice our values to win elections," Koroson said.

The Democrats do, that's why they're winning.  It also helps to be right when it comes to social issues....


It's refreshing to see that the GOP didn't learn anything from the last election.
2013-06-17 02:36:13 PM
1 votes:
Hey, do any of you farkers posting Umbert the Unborn have the expressed written permission of Gary Cangemi?
2013-06-17 02:36:08 PM
1 votes:

sweetmelissa31: In other news, there is a comic strip less funny than Mallard Filmore.


Yeah, "Umbert" is pretty shiatty as cartoons go. Even his name sucks. It's (probably) a ripoff of "Dilbert," because "-berts" are funny. Why the "Um-" prefix though? It rhymes with "Un-" as in "unborn." Kinda. I guess.

/Dilbert's dog was originally going to be named "Dildog," but the publishing syndicate nixed that idea. True story.
2013-06-17 02:34:58 PM
1 votes:

Sgt Otter: God Is My Co-Pirate: This is going to be "Poochie says abortions are hilarious to the max, dude!" isn't it?

[www.ncregister.com image 342x468]

There is a whole series of these.


prolifescranton.org

Worst.  Pride Float.  Ever.
2013-06-17 02:33:51 PM
1 votes:
"How do you make abortion funny?"

I do hope they run with this one.

Sgt Otter:

[www.ncregister.com image 342x468]

There is a whole series of these.


It's pretty impressive how they manage to completely remove the woman from the comic.
2013-06-17 02:33:18 PM
1 votes:
Travis Korson, the grass-roots director of the Virginia chapter, suggested framing marriage as an economic issue. "Gay marriage undermines that basic family unit," he said, and that, in turn, hurts the economy.

It doesn't matter how good your logic might be if no one believes your horseshiat premise.
2013-06-17 02:31:06 PM
1 votes:

what_now: The named the black fetus Elwood. Holy shiat.


He's a Blues musician.  They're all black, right?
2013-06-17 02:29:54 PM
1 votes:

sweetmelissa31: Sgt Otter: There is a whole series of these.

[blog.beliefnet.com image 342x463]

This Mom was apparently getting around.

In other news, there is a comic strip less funny than Mallard Filmore.


2.bp.blogspot.com

This is too much Poe's Law.
2013-06-17 02:28:27 PM
1 votes:

sweetmelissa31: Sgt Otter: There is a whole series of these.

[blog.beliefnet.com image 342x463]

This Mom was apparently getting around.

In other news, there is a comic strip less funny than Mallard Filmore.


sweetmelissa31: Sgt Otter: There is a whole series of these.

[blog.beliefnet.com image 342x463]

This Mom was apparently getting around.

In other news, there is a comic strip less funny than Mallard Filmore.



Have you never read hope and change comics?
Here's today's strip.

img844.imageshack.us
2013-06-17 02:27:44 PM
1 votes:
3.bp.blogspot.com

How do you get an abortion pregnant? You fark it.
2013-06-17 02:24:18 PM
1 votes:

Sgt Otter: Travis Korson, the Grassroots Director of the Virginia chapter, suggested framing marriage as an economic issue. "Gay marriage undermines that basic family unit," he said, and that, in turn, hurts the economy.

Yes, because when I'm walking down the street in Portland's gay (well, gay-er) district, past the thriving boutiques, upscale bars, gourmet restaurants, art galleries, renovated condos, and design firms, the streets lined with new BMWs, Mini-Coopers, and Priuses, my first thought is, "man, these gays sure are hurting the economy."


Yeah, that's the first thought I had, too. All of the gay couples I know are destroying the economy with their double-income no-kids spending habits.
2013-06-17 02:24:08 PM
1 votes:
Conservatives still haven't figured out that they're not really good at the humor business.

/shocking
2013-06-17 02:17:35 PM
1 votes:

serial_crusher: I always thought there should be an aborted fetus superhero called the Miscarriage of Justice


i.imgur.com
2013-06-17 02:17:19 PM
1 votes:

Sgt Otter: God Is My Co-Pirate: This is going to be "Poochie says abortions are hilarious to the max, dude!" isn't it?

[www.ncregister.com image 342x468]

There is a whole series of these.


Ok..I don't understand. Is he saying that it was more dangerous to be a fetus before we knew about folic acid and fetal alcohol syndrome?  Or is it..more dangerous now because he has to dodge coathangers? Or..wat?

Also, has he started a little fire inside her uterus? What the fark?
2013-06-17 02:02:26 PM
1 votes:

So, the plan for the GOP from the great minds at the "Faith and Freedom Coalition Conference" is...
1) Try and come up with humorously persuasive memes, despite the general deficit of conservative comedians (as opposed to conservatives who are clownish)
2) Try framing gay marriage as economic argument to appeal to those with fiscal conservatism, without worrying about whether the reasoning of the argument makes sense
3) Stop trying to "moderate" on the issues, since when the GOP puts up "moderate" conservatives, they lose.


You guys don't understand. You've already lost. The current generation doesn't care.

a.imageshack.us
carryabigsticker.com

About the only thing doubling down on the Gay Marriage fight at this point seems likely to do is impeach the credibility of the GOP in general, and in particular their stance on abortion -- where there otherwise looks to be almost no generational shift in attitudes.
2013-06-17 01:59:51 PM
1 votes:

vernonFL: Hawkins said it was because the party was too moderate.

[llddr.files.wordpress.com image 320x240]


Some of their unintentional humour is really quite funny.
2013-06-17 01:55:42 PM
1 votes:
Hawkins said it was because the party was too moderate.

llddr.files.wordpress.com
2013-06-17 01:48:29 PM
1 votes:
Ask Sarah Silverman how abortion jokes tend to go over.
2013-06-17 01:34:56 PM
1 votes:

what_now: I don't know man, what about all those gays having children they can't afford and going on welfare?


Someone should tell the gay people that abstinence is a 100% effective form of birth control.

/I really really REALLY wanted to translate that into Caveman in honor of last week
2013-06-17 01:15:10 PM
1 votes:
Q: What's the difference between getting a legal abortion and not getting one?

/A: An ultra-sound wand
2013-06-17 12:53:57 PM
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
2013-06-17 12:41:30 PM
1 votes:

RodneyToady: "How do you make abortion funny?"


When you find out, tell Adam Sandler & Rob Schneider. Based on their recent movie output, they've been working on this problem for years.
2013-06-17 12:34:26 PM
1 votes:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get an abortion.
2013-06-17 12:28:39 PM
1 votes:
"How do you make abortion funny?"

Clown abortions?
 
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