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(Salon)   Republicans develop plan to appeal to millenials: make gay marriage and abortion funny   (salon.com) divider line 330
    More: Amusing, social conservatism, youth vote, abortions  
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4980 clicks; posted to Politics » on 17 Jun 2013 at 2:20 PM (43 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-17 03:51:40 PM

HotWingConspiracy: We can all laugh now, but I give us about two election cycles before these people start shooting.


I will enjoy watching them be shot and burned. A Waco a week for a couple months would put these retards where they belong.
 
2013-06-17 03:52:12 PM

Raharu: One in which he can trade on the legacy of Dr. King (despite having a cabinet which is stunningly lacking in diversity) and hobnob with people of all races, creeds, and colors...as long as they're exceedingly famous and stinking rich ("special VIP access" rewards are granted to individuals and evil corporations based on the size of their bribes, er, contributions beginning at $10,000 and costing as much as $1 million for complete access to the president's balls. Which we presume are Inaugural Balls, but you never know.)


Dave-Barry-like typing detected.

// seriously, that's probably the funniest joke he's ever made
// and even Barry sees it as an obvious, throwaway joke
 
2013-06-17 03:52:49 PM

Raharu: Satanic_Hamster: Raharu: Yes, even the dogs.

img850.imageshack.us

I don't know what's worse; that someone made that, or that someone made it, looked at it, and still decided to post that on the internet.  Not only is it not funny, the quality of the artwork is just horrible.


It's a actually improved, you should see some of his older works.

[img849.imageshack.us image 640x309]

Here's the commentary:
Yes, everyone is getting "wee-wee'ed up" with planning for Barack Hussein Obama's second inauguration next week, and every detail is getting keen attention - unlike any policy decisions which happened during the president's first term.

As one of the festive highlights, the most racist and race-baiting president of modern times will take the oath of office with his hand placed on the Bible of Republican and civil rights icon Martin Luther King Jr who, if alive today, would surely raise his face to the heavens and say, "why the hell does the president have a predator drone circling me?"

Because Obama repudiates the legacy of Dr. King with every action he takes, and wants a colorblind society about as much as he wants to pay for his own vacations.

Which perhaps explains why the ceremony in which Barry uses King's Bible will be a complete charade: because his actual swearing in will take place 24 hours earlier in a private ceremony using a Bible from Michelle's family which is probably not a Koran.

But instead of going back to work on Monday, all sworn in and promising to defend the Constitution, Barry wants the pomp and circumstance of a huge and expensive public spectacle which has no legal validity whatsoever.

One in which he can trade on the legacy of Dr. King (despite having a cabinet which is stunningly lacking in diversity) and hobnob with people of all races, creeds, and colors...as long as they're exceedingly famous and stinking rich ("special VIP access" rewards are granted to individuals and evil corporations based on the size of their bribes, er, contr ...


The only remotely funny strip you've posted from that Hope n Change guy is STILL the one where the wife came up with the punchline. And my finding that strip funny is purely because I love wordplay.
 
2013-06-17 03:53:51 PM

Satanic_Hamster: Raharu: Yes, even the dogs.

img850.imageshack.us

I don't know what's worse; that someone made that, or that someone made it, looked at it, and still decided to post that on the internet.  Not only is it not funny, the quality of the artwork is just horrible.


www.captainscomments.com

"Sheesh, at most 300,000 Iraqi civilians died.  BFD.  Also, ass."
 
2013-06-17 03:53:56 PM

Raharu: [img198.imageshack.us image 850x409]

[img844.imageshack.us image 800x389]

[img37.imageshack.us image 640x309]

[img21.imageshack.us image 800x390]


Am I a terrible person for laughing at the third one a little?
 
2013-06-17 03:55:01 PM

theorellior: Aarontology: Because if there's one thing young folks respond to, it's "jokes" by religious groups trying to be hip and relevant.

They need to talk to this guy:

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 500x398]


Doesn't matter how old that is or how many times I see it, that NEVER fails to make me smile.
 
2013-06-17 03:55:49 PM

Sgt Otter: [www.captainscomments.com image 575x200]

"Sheesh, at most 300,000 Iraqi civilians died.  BFD.  Also, ass."


I sure hope that slut isn't demanding that I pay for her damn birth control.  Look at her, whoring around in stupid political cartoons like a whore.
 
2013-06-17 03:56:43 PM

Super Chronic: Raharu: [img198.imageshack.us image 850x409]

[img844.imageshack.us image 800x389]

[img37.imageshack.us image 640x309]

[img21.imageshack.us image 800x390]

Am I a terrible person for laughing at the third one a little?


If you are, then I'm joining you on the flight to Hell.
 
2013-06-17 03:58:12 PM

sweetmelissa31: Is this an argument for opening our borders?

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 342x477]


It's an argument for drinking. Lots and lots of drinking.
 
2013-06-17 03:58:47 PM

Raharu: As one of the festive highlights, the most racist and race-baiting president of modern times will take the oath of office with his hand placed on the Bible of Republican and civil rights icon Martin Luther King Jr who, if alive today, would surely raise his face to the heavens and say, "why the hell does the president have a predator drone circling me?"


Actually, I'm pretty sure he'd say, "LET ME OUT OF THIS COFFIN!"
 
2013-06-17 03:59:23 PM

Raharu: what_now: Raharu: Unless they're Obama supporters, in which case you can go straight to hell because we really do believe the First Family is this despicable.

The first FAMILY? You think the kids and the dogs are despicable?

Yes, even the dogs.

[img850.imageshack.us image 640x327]


Now THAT is FUNNY.
 
2013-06-17 04:00:29 PM
img708.imageshack.us

Michelle Obama has officially unveiled the 2012 Christmas decorations at the Whitehouse, including 54 different designer-decorated trees and a 300-pound gingerbread replica of the Whitehouse to commemorate this year's holiday theme of "austerity."

No, just kidding! It's the same wretched excess as usual, but the official holiday theme is "Joy To All." They would have included "...And Peace On Earth" in the theme, but didn't want to discourage anyone from celebrating the holidays by firing rockets at Israel.

In the first lady's official comments, she mentions the "many joys of the holiday seasons" and then defines those joys as "giving and service to others," and "sharing our blessings with one another." Which are lovely sentiments when contained in scripture, but are considerably less so when turned into hundreds of pages of new tax codes.

With so many Christmas trees festooning the Whitehouse (every one of which will be abandoned December 17th, when the Obamas leave on their $4 million Hawaiian vacation), we can't help but wonder if there's one in the Situation Room...where Barack Obama may have given the order not to send aid to the four Americans murdered by terrorists in Benghazi.

With a stink that bad, you definitely need to add some pine fresh scent to the air.
 
2013-06-17 04:02:19 PM

Fjornir: The whole concept is farked up. The party is faced with two options: reform the party to reflect the will of the people. Or attempt to alter the electorate to conform to the will of the party.

One of these choices is wrong.


And, if you're a conservative, that would be the first choice. Seriously, listen to Rush Limbaugh or Sean Hannity go on 20 minute rants about how important it is to stick to your principles no matter what the rest of the world is saying. All these people talk about is how to get the rest of the world to see their dingy, inefficient, incandescent light. Oh, and projecting their own tactics onto their opposition, and therefore refusing to ever take what they say at face-value.
 
2013-06-17 04:03:30 PM

Fido McCokefiend: theorellior:

[ionenewsone.files.wordpress.com image 425x255]

Took TWO people to come up with this genius ObamaNation comic.


I like to think that comic follows the Pacific Rim Operating System, in that attempting to control derp of a certain size and magnitude can kill any one person, so you must bring in a second and even out the load it puts on the brain. 

/All hail the rise of Derpviathan.
 
2013-06-17 04:03:36 PM

Relatively Obscure: Travis Korson, the Grassroots Director of the Virginia chapter, suggested framing marriage as an economic issue. "Gay marriage undermines that basic family unit," he said, and that, in turn, hurts the economy.

This person doesn't believe this, but thinks you are incredibly stupid.


You know, if you squint, that might be considered conservative humor...

"We need to ban gay marriage!"

"...why?"

"Because it destroys families!"

"So?"

"Families are the cornerstone of civilization!"

"Yeah, but lots of things destroy families."

"Without solid families, children suffer!"

"...suffering children never bugged us before..."

"There's a remote possibility that it'll slow economic growth!"

"BAN GAY MARRIAGE!!!"

/ Or did you mean "intentionally funny?"
 
2013-06-17 04:04:12 PM

Somacandra: Target Builder: It's pretty impressive how they manage to completely remove the woman from the comic.

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 342x477]

Not if the unborn child is female.


Wait... I read that to the tune of one of "Father and Son".  I'm sure I'm mistaken, but that would have been hilariously ironic to me at least.
 
2013-06-17 04:04:35 PM

Raharu: [img708.imageshack.us image 640x307]


I have to say, I find these kind of hilarious. But only because they're so bad they're good.
 
2013-06-17 04:05:46 PM
The trouble with conservative humor is that their idea of "political correctness" has expanded to included pretty much any basic social protocol.

There's a self-satisfied assumption that as long as SOMEBODY is pissed off at the end, that proves that what you said or did was both funny and brave.
 
2013-06-17 04:06:16 PM

Target Builder: It's pretty impressive how they manage to completely remove the woman from the comic


"Pregnancy is all about ME!"

/ See, conservative humor works.
 
2013-06-17 04:09:10 PM

Raharu: [img211.imageshack.us image 800x392]


Here's the Commentary for that comic:

Today is the observance of Yom Hashoah, the remembrance of the Holocaust. And first and foremost, Hope n' Change offers sincere apologies to those rightfully offended by today's entirely tasteless cartoon. Unless they're Obama supporters, in which case you can go straight to hell because we really do believe the First Family is this despicable.

This is the president who is allowing Iran to obtain nuclear weapons with which to wipe Israel off the map (after which, we suppose, we'll have to refer to Holocaust I and Holocaust II). And this is the woman who could think of nothing about our country which made her proud like, oh, winning World War II and saving as many people as possible from the death camps.

In fact, according to the president, an uncle on his mother's side helped liberate Auschwitz. Or at least, that was his story until it was pointed out that Auschwitz was liberated by forces of the Soviet Union, after which the president changed his story to say that maybe he was thinking of Buchenwald or something, because pretty much all death camps look alike.

The purpose of Yom Hashoah is to remember the Holocaust so that nothing like it can ever happen again. So is it wildly inappropriate for Hope n' Change to attack Barack Obama on this sad and solemn day? We don't think so.

Not as long as he continues to strengthen his own hold on power by pushing hate, fear, and enmity among different groups. Not as long as this administration increases surveillance (and therefore coercive pressure) on "suspected terrorists" like conservatives, veterans, and Christians. Not as long as this president defends the taking of millions of innocent lives via abortion - including"postnatal termination" which amounts to beheading a newborn child (and thanks to Obamacare, your "medical technician" will shout "Allahu Akbar!" at no extra charge). Not as long as this president seeks to use executive orders to ...


I don't usually say this about the loonies, but this guy may be legitimately mentally ill. This is why we need better public support for mental illness research and treatment. It's not fair that this man should have to live with his misplaced apoplexy and impotent paranoia. Let's get him help.
 
2013-06-17 04:10:03 PM

RodneyToady: Why did the Mexican chicken cross the road border?
To get an abortion.


FTFY

/It's a joke.
 
2013-06-17 04:10:51 PM
Maybe they could show George W. Bush looking behind chairs and under sofa cushions for Iraqi WMDs a wire clothes hanger to give Jenna a back alley clear the brush, as it were.
 
2013-06-17 04:12:33 PM

xanadian: What? Make abortion funny? What the hell are they gonna do?  Make big rubber aborted fetus puppets and do a routine with them or something?


That abortion doctor? He's just in it for the jokes.

/He just took tips, but if you rub it, it's little head waggles back and to the left. Back and to the left.
//Try the veal. It's like a baby cow, but not a cow fetus. Cause a baby cow could barely feed us! Thank you, g'nite.
 
2013-06-17 04:13:07 PM

GreatGlavinsGhost: RodneyToady: Why did the Mexican chicken cross the road border?
To get an abortion.

FTFY

/It's a joke.


I guess that should have beengay chicken, not Mexican.

/It's a ruined joke.
 
2013-06-17 04:13:41 PM
The GOP and the Gay Marriage issue:

www.donquijote.cc
 
2013-06-17 04:15:00 PM

Sgt Otter: God Is My Co-Pirate: This is going to be "Poochie says abortions are hilarious to the max, dude!" isn't it?

[www.ncregister.com image 342x468]

There is a whole series of these.


wow. those are terrible.
 
2013-06-17 04:15:04 PM
img11.imageshack.us
 
2013-06-17 04:16:33 PM
All these cartoons are from the Onion, right?
 
2013-06-17 04:17:29 PM

Raharu:


Is this dude even trying to conceal his racism? It's sticking out like a Klan hood right here. And all for a "Stevens died LOL BLACKS" message.
 
2013-06-17 04:18:08 PM

Raharu: [img11.imageshack.us image 400x269]


There's an earlier version of that cartoon on his hard drive somewhere that says "Every n*gg*h know Obamaphone..."

That's not a "people that don't like Obama are racist thing", that's a "I speak English well enough to recognize a barely concealed grammatical pattern" thing.
 
2013-06-17 04:19:24 PM

Raharu: In the first lady's official comments, she mentions the "many joys of the holiday seasons" and then defines those joys as "giving and service to others," and "sharing our blessings with one another." Which are lovely sentiments when contained in scripture, but are considerably less so when turned into hundreds of pages of new tax codes.


Michelle Obama:  Author of Tax Codes
 
2013-06-17 04:23:02 PM

Soup4Bonnie: Raharu: In the first lady's official comments, she mentions the "many joys of the holiday seasons" and then defines those joys as "giving and service to others," and "sharing our blessings with one another." Which are lovely sentiments when contained in scripture, but are considerably less so when turned into hundreds of pages of new tax codes.

Michelle Obama:  Author of Tax Codes


It's important to remember that charity and kindness are fine when outlined in a text you can use to occasionally cow and browbeat people you don't like, as long as that doesn't actually have the force of law. However, when those virtues are actually implemented as social policy, they become oppression. The concept of a Christian Nation only extends to those things which do not personally inconvenience us, and are generally only applicable when used to relegate people we don't like to second-class citizenship.
 
2013-06-17 04:23:32 PM

Soup4Bonnie: Raharu: In the first lady's official comments, she mentions the "many joys of the holiday seasons" and then defines those joys as "giving and service to others," and "sharing our blessings with one another." Which are lovely sentiments when contained in scripture, but are considerably less so when turned into hundreds of pages of new tax codes.

Michelle Obama:  Author of Tax Codes


To be fair, this comes from somebody that probably finds Michelle to be morbidly obese. Still one of the most confusing jokes I've ever seen.

When they aren't making an angry black woman joke out of her, they make jokes out of their distorted fantasies.
 
2013-06-17 04:24:06 PM

PonceAlyosha: vernonFL: Whats 12 inches long and will make a woman cry all night?

It can be anything, as long as you hit her hard enough with it.


LAFFTER OL


/missing meow lately
 
2013-06-17 04:26:30 PM
That cartoonist is a bitter racist. I actually feel bad for him.
 
2013-06-17 04:27:45 PM

serial_crusher: Gunther: Somacandra: Seriously--what is the joke supposed to be?

Right wing humor is clearly too sophisticated for you.

Seriously though, there's a reason why 99% of comedians are left-wingers. Comedy requires subtlety, which requires a viewpoint capable of distinguishing shades of gray. If you see everything in absolutist terms you cannot write a joke.

i think the successful formula for right wing humor is that it has to be slightly offensive.  Take the South Park episode with Christopher Reeve for example.  It would be a stretch to call South Park a right wing show in general--they pretty much make fun of everything--but that particular episode resonates with common right wing views.  The whole thing is about Christopher Reeve killing fetuses for personal gain and becoming a super villain in the process.  The way he snaps the fetuses' necks to suck the stem cells out really drives home the supposed vileness of what he's doing.  That's how political humor should work.  Make people laugh, but also get them thinking.


The depiction of Christopher Reeve was so over-the-top, I thought it was a parody of conservatives' perception of the stem-cell debate.
 
2013-06-17 04:34:04 PM

sweetmelissa31: In other news, there is a comic strip less funny than Mallard Filmore.


Yes.  It's called Henry, and it farking sucks.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henry_%28comic_strip%29
 
2013-06-17 04:34:28 PM

ALL GIRLS AGREE TO PULL PANTIES DOWN: serial_crusher: Gunther: Somacandra: Seriously--what is the joke supposed to be?

Right wing humor is clearly too sophisticated for you.

Seriously though, there's a reason why 99% of comedians are left-wingers. Comedy requires subtlety, which requires a viewpoint capable of distinguishing shades of gray. If you see everything in absolutist terms you cannot write a joke.

i think the successful formula for right wing humor is that it has to be slightly offensive.  Take the South Park episode with Christopher Reeve for example.  It would be a stretch to call South Park a right wing show in general--they pretty much make fun of everything--but that particular episode resonates with common right wing views.  The whole thing is about Christopher Reeve killing fetuses for personal gain and becoming a super villain in the process.  The way he snaps the fetuses' necks to suck the stem cells out really drives home the supposed vileness of what he's doing.  That's how political humor should work.  Make people laugh, but also get them thinking.

The depiction of Christopher Reeve was so over-the-top, I thought it was a parody of conservatives' perception of the stem-cell debate.


It was. He completely missed the point. Apparently, Cartman cloning a Shakey's Pizza with stem cells wasn't a big enough clue that they were making fun of the whole public conception of what stem cells can do.
 
2013-06-17 04:36:34 PM

xanadian: What? Make abortion funny? What the hell are they gonna do?  Make big rubber aborted fetus puppets and do a routine with them or something?


Stop giving Jeff Dunham new ideas!
 
2013-06-17 04:48:18 PM

Arkanaut: xanadian: What? Make abortion funny? What the hell are they gonna do?  Make big rubber aborted fetus puppets and do a routine with them or something?

Stop giving Jeff Dunham new ideas!


First time those phrases were found next to each other in a sentence.
 
2013-06-17 04:49:46 PM

Sgt Otter: God Is My Co-Pirate: This is going to be "Poochie says abortions are hilarious to the max, dude!" isn't it?

[www.ncregister.com image 342x468]

There is a whole series of these.




i301.photobucket.comi301.photobucket.com
i301.photobucket.comi301.photobucket.com
 
2013-06-17 04:51:03 PM

CapeFearCadaver: Yeah, you should make jokes while you're picketing outside a Planned Parenthood; that'll really go over well. That girl will really change her mind when you start telling jokes about something she's spent weeks agonizing over. Then make sure to slut shame her, too.

The best part is that during that whole day, you've probably only yelled at two women who were getting abortions. But women like me love being handed baby booties when I'm going to get a papsmear.


And don't forget all the wonderful video footage that can be easily created to use against them later on.  Many years back I lived across the street from a clinic that did abortions (probably about 0.1% of the procedures they performed) and saw a few protests.  All day long these people were slut-shaming every woman that walked in or out or the place, holding giant signs with very graphic images of aborted fetuses.  They would get in someone's way and make sure she got a good look at the pic.  All kinds of sickening behavior.  If recording devices had been as commonplace and high quality back then as they are now, that would have produced immense amounts of smear campaign material.  Just disgusting behavior.  Yeah, screaming "whore" and "sinner" at a young woman while she's walking in, almost certainly for some other procedure, is gonna make her see your views as completely reasonable.  And if, by chance, she actually is there for an abortion, I'm sure intentionally inflicting even more emotional distress will make her see things your way.  They even did it to a handful of women that were walking past on the sidewalk, not even going into the clinic.
 
2013-06-17 04:53:20 PM
Liberal-leaning humor can be just as bland and awful as the Conservative stuff. I present, "The Brilliant Mind of Edison Lee":

safr.kingfeatures.com

safr.kingfeatures.com

safr.kingfeatures.com
 
2013-06-17 04:56:06 PM

GreatGlavinsGhost: RodneyToady: Why did the Mexican chicken cross the road border?
To get an abortion.

FTFY

/It's a joke.


i301.photobucket.com
 
2013-06-17 04:56:48 PM
The answers offered feel a bit like jamming a square peg in a round hole.
NOPE. They are exactly like jamming a square peg into a tiny round hole, without any lube.
Doesnt fit and there is a LOT of screaming for you to stop.

Hawkins said it was because the party was too moderate. "We keep nominating moderates and saying we need a big tent, but we keep losing."

No one suggested changing any positions, only finding better packaging for the ones they already have. "I do not believe we should sacrifice our values to win elections," Koroson said.

 Guess what?!!
You are losing on positions, NOT on messaging.
Do you THINK that the kids dont know your message?
Do you THINK the kids are dumb or uninformed?

FFS, they watch Colbert and Stewart, THEY KNOW WHAT YOUR MESSAGE IS!!!
THEY HATE YOU!

But whatever you do, dont change your values. Certainly not to win an election.
Thank GOD that you wont change. And we wont have to worry a lot about you winning.
LOL
 
2013-06-17 04:57:27 PM
What did the unaborted fetus say to the aborted fetus?

Look on the bright side, maybe you're a minority, female, or an illegal immigrant or would have grown up to be a gay liberal Muslim.
 
2013-06-17 05:12:55 PM

Skyrmion: Liberal-leaning humor can be just as bland and awful as the Conservative stuff. I present, "The Brilliant Mind of Edison Lee":


There's one really lazy liberal comic which is just Calvin and Hobbes with all the political messages and none of the humor. While Calvin and Hobbes was about a wacky kid with a wild imagination and a relatable child personality when it came to school, imagination, Saturdays and the occasional tough moment in life, the other comic was about a kid trying to parrot liberal politics while her animal friends either agreed or conservative strawmanned at her.

Liberals and conservatives can be horrible with humor. The conservative side often carries more racist jokes because they have more old people that are unaccepting of social change. But I can garuntee there is some racist liberal humor out there somewhere.
 
2013-06-17 05:18:45 PM

WizardofToast: Skyrmion: Liberal-leaning humor can be just as bland and awful as the Conservative stuff. I present, "The Brilliant Mind of Edison Lee":

There's one really lazy liberal comic which is just Calvin and Hobbes with all the political messages and none of the humor. While Calvin and Hobbes was about a wacky kid with a wild imagination and a relatable child personality when it came to school, imagination, Saturdays and the occasional tough moment in life, the other comic was about a kid trying to parrot liberal politics while her animal friends either agreed or conservative strawmanned at her.

Liberals and conservatives can be horrible with humor. The conservative side often carries more racist jokes because they have more old people that are unaccepting of social change. But I can garuntee there is some racist liberal humor out there somewhere.


Ted Rall, is a liberal cartoonist who is an absolute asshole.  When he was wasn't mocking Pat Tillman or 9/11 widows, he routinely referred to Colin Powell and Condi Rice as "Bush's House N---gers."
 
2013-06-17 05:20:30 PM
www.voicescarryblog.com

/late to the party
 
2013-06-17 05:26:38 PM

Sgt Otter: WizardofToast: Skyrmion: Liberal-leaning humor can be just as bland and awful as the Conservative stuff. I present, "The Brilliant Mind of Edison Lee":

There's one really lazy liberal comic which is just Calvin and Hobbes with all the political messages and none of the humor. While Calvin and Hobbes was about a wacky kid with a wild imagination and a relatable child personality when it came to school, imagination, Saturdays and the occasional tough moment in life, the other comic was about a kid trying to parrot liberal politics while her animal friends either agreed or conservative strawmanned at her.

Liberals and conservatives can be horrible with humor. The conservative side often carries more racist jokes because they have more old people that are unaccepting of social change. But I can garuntee there is some racist liberal humor out there somewhere.

Ted Rall, is a liberal cartoonist who is an absolute asshole.  When he was wasn't mocking Pat Tillman or 9/11 widows, he routinely referred to Colin Powell and Condi Rice as "Bush's House N---gers."


The momet you said Ted Rall, the image of his Pat Tillman comic returned to my brain. Panel by panel. Word by word. I even remember his comment to Condi and Colin.

What a goddamn tool.
 
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