If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Gawker)   This story has everything. A 450 lb. white trash "Waffle House" rapper. An evil corporation that hates its best customer. And a pregnant bartender that became a lesbian   (gawker.com) divider line 39
    More: Amusing, Nashville Waffle House, Ted Leo, scrambled eggs, cannabis sativa, Gucci Mane, Jason DeFord, Race in hip hop, lesbians  
•       •       •

3083 clicks; posted to Business » on 15 Jun 2013 at 2:37 AM (43 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



39 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-06-14 09:40:07 PM
Meh, can't say I blame waffle House on this one.
 
2013-06-14 09:52:29 PM
I got a big butt and I can not lie
You other brothers can't get by
 
2013-06-14 09:54:11 PM
Did the Bloodhound Gang ever face this kind of backlash?
 
2013-06-14 09:56:44 PM
I gotta say...I should really hate this guy, but his attitude really wins me over.
 
2013-06-14 10:01:20 PM
You would think that they would welcome this, it's free advertisement for them.
 
2013-06-14 10:06:03 PM
TONDA SEE NO PROBLEM HERE.


wait
 
2013-06-14 10:22:55 PM
At Waffle House he was "mister highfalutin' fancy pants"
 
2013-06-14 11:15:44 PM
What about human bathmats?
 
2013-06-14 11:40:45 PM
This guy nails it here:

"Have you all ever went into a after 8pm? It looks like an old pregnant woman strip club that sells hash browns! Dude, ya hire cooks without teeth! And then, like, me putting a little pot leaf beside their logo-that's the worst you've ever looked? If we piss-tested everybody who went to Waffle House on drugs and wouldn't let them inside, they'd be out of business!"

It's hilarious for Waffle House to be all high and mighty about their precious reputation being sullied.  I would set the probability that any given person at a Waffle House between 10 pm and 6 am is intoxicated on one substance or another at 90%.

And how exactly  does Waffle House staff?  Do they wait at the exit gate of prisons and stop people coming out asking "You need a job?"
 
2013-06-14 11:42:45 PM

jake_lex: This guy nails it here:

"Have you all ever went into a after 8pm? It looks like an old pregnant woman strip club that sells hash browns! Dude, ya hire cooks without teeth! And then, like, me putting a little pot leaf beside their logo-that's the worst you've ever looked? If we piss-tested everybody who went to Waffle House on drugs and wouldn't let them inside, they'd be out of business!"

It's hilarious for Waffle House to be all high and mighty about their precious reputation being sullied.  I would set the probability that any given person at a Waffle House between 10 pm and 6 am is intoxicated on one substance or another at 90%.

And how exactly  does Waffle House staff?  Do they wait at the exit gate of prisons and stop people coming out asking "You need a job?"


Yeah. It;s not like they are Red Lobster or something.
 
2013-06-15 12:03:30 AM
fta "I've been smothering, covering, and chunking shiat for 28 years!"

A true artist. He paints pictures with his words.
 
2013-06-15 12:42:11 AM
The biggest thing I miss about the south are Waffle Houses.

They aint anywhere near up here in the northeast
 
2013-06-15 12:49:04 AM
Corporations have to take steps to protect their trademarks and brand names. People like Zipper have lost their trademark because they allowed it to become a generic name and now anyone can use the name zipper.

On the other hand they could have done it far better. An informal contact first and ask him to sign a document saying he acknowledged their IP and agreeing to pay a nominal $1 a year to licence it, and maybe not using it on his next batch.

IIRC there was a whiskey maker who took this approach with a musician who used their bottle on a record label. Anyone remember that?

Found it. Jack Daniels polite C+D letter.
 
2013-06-15 01:43:15 AM

Notabunny: fta "I've been smothering, covering, and chunking shiat for 28 years!"

A true artist. He paints pictures with his words.


Waffle House: Comes Out Just Like It Goes In™
 
2013-06-15 02:52:51 AM

Lurk sober post drunk: I gotta say...I should really hate this guy, but his attitude really wins me over.


Yeah, I want to yell at the guy that he's a dipshiat for not spending $500 to run this by a lawyer before blowing 10k on the concept, but I get the feeling it would be like yelling at a sad St. Bernard.
 
2013-06-15 03:01:27 AM
I suppose "Jelly Roll" is a better rap name than "Lesbian turner-into"
 
2013-06-15 03:05:01 AM
He orders the same meal every time, his particular variation of an All-Star Breakfast: scrambled eggs with cheese and wheat toast; hash browns that are double scattered, smothered, covered, and chunked (splattered with cheese, onions, and ham); a side of sausage; and a chocolate-chip waffle.

At that much crap on your plate already, I really don't think wheat toast is going to give you any health benefits fatty...

Unless he's eating it for the taste? And that I doubt as, after googling their menu, they aren't fresh baking the stuff in house...

/seriously, noticed what looked like a Sarah Lee logo on their tiny jpg menu pic
 
2013-06-15 03:12:46 AM

Iczer: He orders the same meal every time, his particular variation of an All-Star Breakfast: scrambled eggs with cheese and wheat toast; hash browns that are double scattered, smothered, covered, and chunked (splattered with cheese, onions, and ham); a side of sausage; and a chocolate-chip waffle.

At that much crap on your plate already, I really don't think wheat toast is going to give you any health benefits fatty...

Unless he's eating it for the taste? And that I doubt as, after googling their menu, they aren't fresh baking the stuff in house...

/seriously, noticed what looked like a Sarah Lee logo on their tiny jpg menu pic


The Waffle Houses in Biloxi, Mississippi used Bunny Bread, which appeared to be identical to the kind you buy at the grocery store.
 
2013-06-15 03:25:51 AM
It's like I've been saying. In the future, the prejudice will not be racial. The Athletics will be the master race, and the Obesity Epidemics will be people like this guy. God only knows what hellhole existence his biokid will grow up with.....I guess to quote his loser friend in jail, we didn't have any shiat. Only the drug dealers had any good shiat. So that's probably where his biokid is going. What a total pack of losers.
 
2013-06-15 03:33:20 AM
We have a Waffle House and an IHop within 2 miles of each other so their map on that page is incorrect. All we're missing is a Denny's.

/hope for his fans sake Jelly Roll isn't one of those rappers that takes off their shirt like Big B (another fat white rapper)
 
2013-06-15 04:08:58 AM
I went to a Waffle House once. I nearly threw up.

/was not drunk
//from Cali originally. Loves me my animal-style double-doubles
 
2013-06-15 04:38:51 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: I got a big butt and I can not lie
You other brothers can't get by


My homeboys tried to warn me,
But that butt you got won't clear the door frame.
 
2013-06-15 05:07:07 AM
When I was in high school this guy was telling a story about how his family moved to in the Old Puebo as a kid and one of the first things he noticed going along I-10 at night was that that the light in "W" for the "Waffle House" burnt out, making it the "Affle House".  He couldn't understand why there would be a restaurant called the Awful (pronounced) House.
 
2013-06-15 06:26:48 AM

Peki: I went to a Waffle House once. I nearly threw up.

/was not drunk
//from Cali originally. Loves me my animal-style double-doubles


You ordered burgers at waffle house?
 
2013-06-15 07:56:03 AM

Iczer: He orders the same meal every time, his particular variation of an All-Star Breakfast: scrambled eggs with cheese and wheat toast; hash browns that are double scattered, smothered, covered, and chunked (splattered with cheese, onions, and ham); a side of sausage; and a chocolate-chip waffle.

At that much crap on your plate already, I really don't think wheat toast is going to give you any health benefits fatty...

Unless he's eating it for the taste? And that I doubt as, after googling their menu, they aren't fresh baking the stuff in house...

/seriously, noticed what looked like a Sarah Lee logo on their tiny jpg menu pic


"Wheat" bread can be made with up to 51% white flour.
 
2013-06-15 08:24:22 AM

Flint Ironstag: Corporations have to take steps to protect their trademarks and brand names. People like Zipper have lost their trademark because they allowed it to become a generic name and now anyone can use the name zipper.

On the other hand they could have done it far better. An informal contact first and ask him to sign a document saying he acknowledged their IP and agreeing to pay a nominal $1 a year to licence it, and maybe not using it on his next batch.

IIRC there was a whiskey maker who took this approach with a musician who used their bottle on a record label. Anyone remember that?

Found it. Jack Daniels polite C+D letter.


Sounds like J.D. was kind of impressed.

And used Dale Carnegie techniques to get what they needed.
 
2013-06-15 09:31:57 AM

lelio: I suppose "Jelly Roll" is a better rap name than "Lesbian turner-into"


Dyke Turner would be pretty good.
 
2013-06-15 09:49:12 AM
Gee, imagine a company trying to protect its image...  How evil.
 
2013-06-15 09:51:16 AM
The drunks normally show up to Waffle House after midnight.

I've been there plenty of times between 10 pm and midnight and it is generally pretty empty.  But it is pretty much the only thing open.
 
2013-06-15 10:13:57 AM
He's going to be a big success if he doesn't drop dead first from eating a diet like that. which he probably will.

/sarcastic about the success part
 
2013-06-15 11:03:12 AM
Ughh, Waffle House I'm okay with, but Crown Royal?

Die. Heretic. Scum.
 
2013-06-15 11:30:27 AM

wildcardjack: Ughh, Waffle House I'm okay with, but Crown Royal?

Die. Heretic. Scum.


Wild Turkey would fit the "w" theme, and has a lot more redneck cred than overly sweet Canadian whiskey.
 
2013-06-15 12:19:57 PM
Great.  Damn you, subby.

Now I'm going to have to spend time looking for pregnant lesbian porn.  If possible, ones where only one of the woman is pregnant and a strap-on is involved.  And if they're dressed as nuns, I'm not leaving the house at all this weekend.
 
2013-06-15 01:20:56 PM

shanrick: What about human bathmats?


t1.gstatic.com

What's a human bathmat?
 
2013-06-15 10:57:02 PM

Satanic_Hamster: Great.  Damn you, subby.

Now I'm going to have to spend time looking for pregnant lesbian porn.  If possible, ones where only one of the woman is pregnant and a strap-on is involved.  And if they're dressed as nuns, I'm not leaving the house at all this weekend.


Rule 34.

May your searches result in a happy weekend.
 
2013-06-15 11:13:51 PM

jpo2269: Gee, imagine a company trying to protect its image...  How evil.


As if Waffle House had a good image to begin with.
 
2013-06-16 01:32:29 AM

youmightberight: Rule 34.

May your searches result in a happy weekend.


No no, REAL porn.  No hentai / western image stuff.  Rule 34 only applies to works of art / drawings / etc.
 
2013-06-16 10:13:06 AM

Satanic_Hamster: youmightberight: Rule 34.

May your searches result in a happy weekend.

No no, REAL porn.  No hentai / western image stuff.  Rule 34 only applies to works of art / drawings / etc.


I'd lay money rule 34-b covers you.
 
2013-06-16 11:11:12 AM

youmightberight: Satanic_Hamster: youmightberight: Rule 34.

May your searches result in a happy weekend.

No no, REAL porn.  No hentai / western image stuff.  Rule 34 only applies to works of art / drawings / etc.

I'd lay money rule 34-b covers you.


I say out of /b/.  That place aint right.
 
Displayed 39 of 39 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report