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(CBC)   4th of July BBQs in London expected to be 100% improvement with the introduction of Shmeat   (cbc.ca) divider line 88
    More: Obvious, July BBQs, in vitro meat, in vitro meats, shmeat, agricultural land  
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5304 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jun 2013 at 11:51 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-13 12:58:59 PM

thenumber5: Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger. You grill burgers, steaks and hot dogs. BBQ is brisket ribs and burnt ends. And it was perfected in KC

nothing has ever been perfected in KC

///BBQ was perfected in Memphis




You sir/ma'am are a heathen. It's KC or go home. Btw jazz was perfected in KC also.

b>Langdon Alger: Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger. You grill burgers, steaks and hot dogs. BBQ is brisket ribs and burnt ends. And it was perfected in KC

you should try a smoked/BBQ'ed  burger sometime---awesome.


Maybe then. Here's a primer folks if it's quick and hot it's grilling. Low slow it's BBQ
And for the simpler folk out there it's like this.
1 KC style
2 Texas style
3 Memphis style
4 whatever that crap in the Carolina's is
 
2013-06-13 01:02:56 PM
Talk to me when they do with with foie gras.

/like in Port Sandor
//on Fenris
///Bish Ware approves
 
2013-06-13 01:14:20 PM
This London?
www.cityoflondonky.org
 
2013-06-13 01:17:24 PM
I expect it to be bland, flavorless, watery, vapid and tough.

No change there then.

As free range is to factory farmed,
And wild game is to free range
So will vat-farmed meat be to
factory farmed.

A pale imitation.

They should name it I-Can't-Believe-it's-Not-Freezer-Burned-Polystyrene-Foam!

In all likelihood, you won't be able to tell it from frozen pre-formed hamburgers in blind taste tests.

Pink slime by any other name would taste as sweaty.
 
2013-06-13 01:18:51 PM

spiderpaz: What could possibly go wrong


Basically this. It's an interesting idea that I'm sure we will get to one day. Growing meat the old fashioned way is barbaric when viewed from certain perspectives and very inefficient. Growing it in a vat has a lot going for it. But kind of scary, yes. I don't think I would eat it until a number of nations had certified it as safe, and perhaps not even then for a number of years to see if it turns people in zombies or something.

I'm curious as to what the flavor and texture would be like though. The big thing I see is that meat is not uniform. There are fibers and muscle and fat and stuff. Even when ground, the irregularities are a big part of what makes meat yummy. I would expect a lab grown product to be uniform (but maybe I'm wrong) and weird.
 
2013-06-13 01:40:26 PM
They need to clone wheat next. That would be shwheat. Looking forward to some shpagetti and shmeatballs, maybe with some nice shparmesan shcheese shprinkled on it..
 
2013-06-13 01:56:39 PM

FrancoFile: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Do they have 4th of July in England?

No, they go straight from the 3rd to the 5th.  Like skipping the 13th floor in a high-rise.


i work on the 13th floor, so i'm getting a kick...
 
2013-06-13 01:58:59 PM
this one?
newsletter.ledc.com
 
2013-06-13 02:01:10 PM

oldfarthenry: thenumber5: Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger. You grill burgers, steaks and hot dogs. BBQ is brisket ribs and burnt ends. And it was perfected in KC

nothing has ever been perfected in KC

///BBQ was perfected in Memphis

[i1151.photobucket.com image 500x375]


nothing was perfected in memphis, either.  BBQ was made perfect in Keene, NH. 1998   My special BBQ sauce was born.  Beef, brisket, chicken, everything is an orgasm in your mouth when you use my sauce.  No, not kidding.

/too expensive for commercial production
//refused to use false ingredients, or food coloring
///do you know how expensive shiatake mushrooms are?  Even in bulk?
 
2013-06-13 02:01:51 PM
I've said too much already...
 
2013-06-13 02:02:29 PM
i1268.photobucket.com
 
2013-06-13 02:04:14 PM

highendmighty: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Do they have 4th of July in England?

You've got to have a really high self-esteem to play straightman in an online forum.
I salute you!


Thank you.
 
2013-06-13 02:08:10 PM

Trance354: oldfarthenry: thenumber5: Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger. You grill burgers, steaks and hot dogs. BBQ is brisket ribs and burnt ends. And it was perfected in KC

nothing has ever been perfected in KC

///BBQ was perfected in Memphis

[i1151.photobucket.com image 500x375]

nothing was perfected in memphis, either.  BBQ was made perfect in Keene, NH. 1998   My special BBQ sauce was born.  Beef, brisket, chicken, everything is an orgasm in your mouth when you use my sauce.  No, not kidding.

/too expensive for commercial production
//refused to use false ingredients, or food coloring
///do you know how expensive shiatake mushrooms are?  Even in bulk?


I hate to burst your bubble but I'm pretty sure you can get an orgasm in your mouth for free.
 
2013-06-13 02:20:05 PM

Carn: Trance354: oldfarthenry: thenumber5: Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger. You grill burgers, steaks and hot dogs. BBQ is brisket ribs and burnt ends. And it was perfected in KC

nothing has ever been perfected in KC

///BBQ was perfected in Memphis

[i1151.photobucket.com image 500x375]

nothing was perfected in memphis, either.  BBQ was made perfect in Keene, NH. 1998   My special BBQ sauce was born.  Beef, brisket, chicken, everything is an orgasm in your mouth when you use my sauce.  No, not kidding.

/too expensive for commercial production
//refused to use false ingredients, or food coloring
///do you know how expensive shiatake mushrooms are?  Even in bulk?

I hate to burst your bubble but I'm pretty sure you can get an orgasm in your mouth for free.


I've met people who get paid for it.
 
2013-06-13 02:23:51 PM

Trance354: oldfarthenry: thenumber5: Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger. You grill burgers, steaks and hot dogs. BBQ is brisket ribs and burnt ends. And it was perfected in KC

nothing has ever been perfected in KC

///BBQ was perfected in Memphis

[i1151.photobucket.com image 500x375]

nothing was perfected in memphis, either.  BBQ was made perfect in Keene, NH. 1998   My special BBQ sauce was born.  Beef, brisket, chicken, everything is an orgasm in your mouth when you use my sauce.  No, not kidding.

/too expensive for commercial production
//refused to use false ingredients, or food coloring
///do you know how expensive shiatake mushrooms are?  Even in bulk?


if you think that the most important aspect to bbq is the sauce, you have not perfected bbq.
 
2013-06-13 02:32:48 PM

pute kisses like a man: Trance354: oldfarthenry: thenumber5: Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger. You grill burgers, steaks and hot dogs. BBQ is brisket ribs and burnt ends. And it was perfected in KC

nothing has ever been perfected in KC

///BBQ was perfected in Memphis

[i1151.photobucket.com image 500x375]

nothing was perfected in memphis, either.  BBQ was made perfect in Keene, NH. 1998   My special BBQ sauce was born.  Beef, brisket, chicken, everything is an orgasm in your mouth when you use my sauce.  No, not kidding.

/too expensive for commercial production
//refused to use false ingredients, or food coloring
///do you know how expensive shiatake mushrooms are?  Even in bulk?

if you think that the most important aspect to bbq is the sauce, you have not perfected bbq.


This is correct.  Glopping sauce all over everything so that you can't taste the meat is NOT bbq.  It's a waste of meat.
 
2013-06-13 02:34:45 PM

brantgoose: I expect it to be bland, flavorless, watery, vapid and tough.

No change there then.

As free range is to factory farmed,
And wild game is to free range
So will vat-farmed meat be to
factory farmed.

A pale imitation.

They should name it I-Can't-Believe-it's-Not-Freezer-Burned-Polystyrene-Foam!

In all likelihood, you won't be able to tell it from frozen pre-formed hamburgers in blind taste tests.

Pink slime by any other name would taste as sweaty.


You know my ex-girlfriend too?
 
2013-06-13 02:38:38 PM
I wonder how much a square foot for flawless mink carpet grown in a factory?

We're doing cloned skin from burn victims for themselves already
 
2013-06-13 02:39:10 PM

clambam: They need to clone wheat next. That would be shwheat. Looking forward to some shpagetti and shmeatballs, maybe with some nice shparmesan shcheese shprinkled on it..



We will lishen to their rock and roll, while we conduct misshile drillsh.
 
2013-06-13 02:40:13 PM

Mid_mo_mad_man: You sir/ma'am are a heathen. It's KC or go home. Btw jazz was perfected in KC also.


Jazz? biatch, please. KC isn't even in the same realm as New Orleans.

And as for BBQ? I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of some proper barbacoa. You know, the cooking method so good that people in the Carolinas, Memphis, Texas, and Kansas City tried to copy it for themselves. The people in KC decided that spooning on molasses and tomatoes was some sort of substitute for maguey leaves.

//They're wrong
 
2013-06-13 02:44:24 PM

Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger. You grill burgers, steaks and hot dogs. BBQ is brisket ribs and burnt ends. And it was perfected in KC


You started off just fine, and then you had to go and accidentally the whole thing.
 
2013-06-13 02:46:29 PM
England?  I've been to many "BBQs" in England.  I usually laugh my ass off for a good half hour watching the hosts construct some brick and wire abomination and try to get the fire going, and then get hungry enough to just shove them aside and take over the cooking duties.  Fish and chips, fine, but asking a Brit to grill is like asking a duck to do algebra.
 
2013-06-13 02:47:45 PM
Is that a contraction of Schit and Meat?
 
2013-06-13 02:49:43 PM
*Hork*

/That is all.
 
2013-06-13 02:53:22 PM

probesport: Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger

Not with that attitude.


*snerk*
 
2013-06-13 03:10:29 PM

Gonz: Mid_mo_mad_man: You sir/ma'am are a heathen. It's KC or go home. Btw jazz was perfected in KC also.

Jazz? biatch, please. KC isn't even in the same realm as New Orleans.


i think he's trolling.
 
2013-06-13 03:16:38 PM

pute kisses like a man: Gonz: Mid_mo_mad_man: You sir/ma'am are a heathen. It's KC or go home. Btw jazz was perfected in KC also.

Jazz? biatch, please. KC isn't even in the same realm as New Orleans.

i think he's trolling.


No, he's talking about Count Basie and Charlie Parker, and that blues/jazz fusion that grew out of KC. The city's actually got a fairly strong jazz heritage, which is why he used the term "perfected".

That, or he's talking about Pat Metheny... in which case, yeah, he's trolling.
 
2013-06-13 03:23:57 PM

xoxo: No thanks, I'll just have some Por-eef.


Yeah, but what's the better tasting, Por-Eef or this dark cola?

/meat shmeat
 
2013-06-13 03:41:34 PM
www.reellifewithjane.com

Have some schmiel and schmazel with that shmeat.
 
2013-06-13 03:55:53 PM

Gunny Walker: [i1268.photobucket.com image 546x487]


I'll have the soup.
 
2013-06-13 04:15:49 PM

FrancoFile: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Do they have 4th of July in England?

No, they go straight from the 3rd to the 5th.  Like skipping the 13th floor in a high-rise.


Beat me to it!!!! My neighbour once asked me if we celebrate 4th July in England, I said yes, but over there we call it Thanksgiving!
 
2013-06-13 04:51:19 PM

pute kisses like a man: Gonz: Mid_mo_mad_man: You sir/ma'am are a heathen. It's KC or go home. Btw jazz was perfected in KC also.

Jazz? biatch, please. KC isn't even in the same realm as New Orleans.

i think he's trolling.




I'm referring to 18 & Vine you know the famous jazz distract of KC. It's where the National Jazz museum. Down the street from the Negroe Leagues museum. Not trolling just know what I speak of.
 
2013-06-13 05:16:56 PM

Mid_mo_mad_man: pute kisses like a man: Gonz: Mid_mo_mad_man: You sir/ma'am are a heathen. It's KC or go home. Btw jazz was perfected in KC also.

Jazz? biatch, please. KC isn't even in the same realm as New Orleans.

i think he's trolling.

I'm referring to 18 & Vine you know the famous jazz distract of KC. It's where the National Jazz museum. Down the street from the Negroe Leagues museum. Not trolling just know what I speak of.


when was jazz perfected?  when did it even start?  it's pretty tough to use a word like perfected regarding something that is almost impossible to define in the first place.  for which reason, i thought you were up to no good.

/ plus, come on, the answer's new orleans. ;)
 
2013-06-13 08:28:42 PM
"SCMEAT IS MADE OF PEEEPLE!"
 
2013-06-13 08:39:23 PM

BarefootInTheFark: Cardiff? Wasn't this an episode of Torchwood?


Alien whale meat as I recall. Also they ended up euthanizing the poor creature (Torchwood never liking happy endings).
 
2013-06-13 10:37:51 PM

Mid_mo_mad_man: You don't BBQ a burger. You grill burgers, steaks and hot dogs. BBQ is brisket ribs and burnt ends. And it was perfected in KC


This, here, is the TRUTH as is ordained by the FSM, rAmen! BBQ is not something you do with burger. It isn't something you do with vegetables, it isn't a dog, a steak, or anything else that you randomly decided to GRILL. That is GRILLING. Grilling is not BBQing. The two are NOT synonymous. They do not mean the same nor do they taste the same. If you don't know this then you've never had BBQ. It is also acceptable to get BBQ in Payola. I may be a sinner in that I diverge here - Texas and North Carolina can use the term BBQ too but only because they've earned it by creating a good, unique, product. However, they need to specify Texas BBQ or North Carolina BBQ. BBQ defaults to KC but, seriously, you can get BBQ in Payola too but that's a proximity thing.

Ketchup is not BBQ sauce. There has never been a BBQed hot dog, ever. There will never be a BBQed burger. Your steak is not BBQed just because you put BBQ sauce on it and grilled it. BBQ isn't done in 10 minutes. BBQ isn't done in 30 minutes either. Your grill is just a grill.

If you disagree with any of these statements (except the bit about Texas and North Carolina - I can accept disagreement there and I can even see the justification for it though I strongly disagree) then you need to be locked in the closet, doused in gasoline, and set afire. The world simply has no need for you and your ilk.

Additionally, very few skilled BBQers have managed to sneak into the wild. They are not yours, they do not belong to you. If they make a claim that they've developed a "Your State Style" BBQ then they are frauds. They need to be impaled, this should be done on a 4" spike and it should be inserted anally. Make sure that you tilt their head forward and avoid the spine so that they survive a while when you stand the spike up.

This is not something that is subject to debate. If you think that it is, you're wrong. If you think that there's "a different version" then you are also wrong. There are two exceptions, they have been listed, there will be no more exceptions made to this list. If you want to see WHY there are no more exceptions then you're invited to travel to those three locations and try the products for yourself. You may have some confusion as to find a suitable dining hall for such... The 12 pack of beer and a pathetic look may net you an invitation to a back yard. This is okay but you're better off looking for the place with the dirty curtains and the people with stained faces... If the restaurant appears too clean you're in the wrong place. If there are linen napkins, you're in the wrong place. If there are fancy cars in the parking lot, you're in the wrong place. If there are generic paper towels instead of napkins, dirty faces, trucks that actually look like they get used for work, a dingy look (from all the smoke), and the waitresses are all overweight then you're probably in the right place. I tell you this not because I'm worried about giving up the secret but because I want you to live, at least for a short time, for once in your pathetic existences you call a life and there is much confusion about this topic.

Again, let me get a rAmen! That is all...

Err... Wait, no it isn't...

Anyhow, finally, why is this just making Fark now? Old news is exciting!!!
 
2013-06-14 12:05:08 AM
www.wearysloth.com


R.I.P. Pahpshmir
 
2013-06-14 01:43:31 AM

Inaditch: So, let me get this straight. GMOs are evil, but schmeat is ok?


Im pretty sure no.  I mean, if you are a nutjob who is afraid of high productivity oats.

/ if it was poisonous, they would be killing of their customer base.  why would they do that?
 
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