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(Daily Mail)   Kate Upton   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 30
    More: Obvious, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, Set construction, other woman, New York's Upper East Side, bikinis, Italian restaurant, Us Weekly  
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14111 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 13 Jun 2013 at 8:51 AM (43 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-06-13 11:13:30 AM
4 votes:

Everybody's on about her hips or ass or tits. Even if she was just a head-in-a-jar looking at her would be like being buggered by a chorus of angels.

i.imgur.com
i.imgur.com

2013-06-13 09:05:09 AM
4 votes:

stoli n coke: STUDMEN69 ASSEMBLE!




Overweight
Weird torso
Love handles
No ass
Chicken legs
2013-06-13 10:19:26 AM
3 votes:

stoli n coke: STUDMEN69 ASSEMBLE!


I think I've mentioned in every Kate Upton thread that outside of her breasts (which are very nice), I don't like the way the rest of her body looks.  So I definitely need to be noted down in the Studman Brigade for this one.

No waist/hips.  Her ass doesn't have enough definition.  The only decent thing about her is the boobs.
2013-06-13 09:05:00 AM
3 votes:

stoli n coke: STUDMEN69 ASSEMBLE!


She'd be hot if she had a waist.
2013-06-13 11:01:13 AM
2 votes:
HOTY candidate right there for its pithy minimalism.
2013-06-13 10:19:04 AM
2 votes:
I hope she knows how to eat right and exercise because she is f*cked when she hits 25
2013-06-13 10:12:54 AM
2 votes:
My lord, she is going to be a huge fat pig one day. And that one day might not be far off unless she starts doing something about it now.
2013-06-13 09:16:56 AM
2 votes:
Upton thread.

i568.photobucket.com

i568.photobucket.com

i568.photobucket.com
ecl
2013-06-13 10:48:22 PM
1 votes:

ZeroCorpse: Jeez... I intimately know someone in her 40s who has a better body than Upton. There's such a thing as waist-to-hip ratio. Kate looks like a sack filled with whipped potatoes from her ribcage to her ass. Sure, she has nice boobs, but they only draw so much attention because she wears bras/bikinis that are a size too small, and her boobfat spills out the sides, like a fat man in a hammock.

Ultimately, I can't get past her weird Toddlers & Tiaras baby face, though. It's creepy.


img.fark.net
2013-06-13 06:54:04 PM
1 votes:

roflmaonow: Too bad this gif couldn't be embedded, but mother of god, in my bunk, dont shower her and bring to my quarters

http://imgbox.com/acpeFrjr


Might wanna throw a NSFW on that.
2013-06-13 01:39:31 PM
1 votes:

Pants full of macaroni!!: Wellon Dowd: Farking Canuck: I'd give her a reality bump, if ya know what I mean, and I think you do.

Congratz ... you officially just wore that meme out.

Kate Upton is a peach. Like when you eat a peach that is so ripe you can push your thumb through the skin. The juice runs down your chin and drips onto your chest, and in between your fingers it gets so sticky you have trouble separating them. The next day, even after you wash your hands, you can still smell the sweet juice on your skin and, if no one is watching, you lick your fingers and the memory of that sweet fruit on your tongue floods back. Kate is like that.

If Kate Upton plops her fat ass down on your toilet, you better get the plunger ready.  She BEEFS.  She'll drop 5 or 6 forearm-sized logs in there with no flushes in between. Rumor has it that on the set of the SI 2012 Swimsuit Issue shoot she used to shiat in the shower and heel it down the drain.


I'd jerk off to the smell of her shiat
2013-06-13 01:35:29 PM
1 votes:

Wartime Consiglieri: Pants full of macaroni!!:
If Kate Upton plops her fat ass down on your toilet, you better get the plunger ready.  She BEEFS.  She'll drop 5 or 6 forearm-sized logs in there with no flushes in between. Rumor has it that on the set of the SI 2012 Swimsuit Issue shoot she used to shiat in the shower and heel it down the drain.

That was a way too bitter and transparent way of coming out to a bunch of strangers on the internet! Have you at least come out to your family yet? If you haven't, just run upstairs and do it real quick.


You did it! You did it! She's calling you right now! I know it!
2013-06-13 01:34:47 PM
1 votes:

Wartime Consiglieri: DubyaHater: stoli n coke: STUDMEN69 ASSEMBLE!

Overweight
Weird torso
Love handles
No ass
Chicken legs

I love how this retard calls her overweight right before he refers to her flat ass and chicken legs! what makes her overweight genius? That she doesn't have a six pack like the boy of your dreams? If anything, she's underweight.

And then of course we have the basement Nostradamus who shows up in every thread featuring a girl over 90 pounds to inform us she's going to look like a whale by 25:)

Don't kid yourselves dipshiats...the hottest girl who's ever even said hi to you looks like a dead racoon next to this chick.


Keep going, man! She's just about to contact you for sex!
2013-06-13 12:39:38 PM
1 votes:
For fark's sake, we all want to pork her.  All of this other jibba jabba is nonsense.
2013-06-13 11:52:28 AM
1 votes:

Wellon Dowd: Farking Canuck: I'd give her a reality bump, if ya know what I mean, and I think you do.

Congratz ... you officially just wore that meme out.

Kate Upton is a peach. Like when you eat a peach that is so ripe you can push your thumb through the skin. The juice runs down your chin and drips onto your chest, and in between your fingers it gets so sticky you have trouble separating them. The next day, even after you wash your hands, you can still smell the sweet juice on your skin and, if no one is watching, you lick your fingers and the memory of that sweet fruit on your tongue floods back. Kate is like that.


adaptershack.com

i2.kym-cdn.com

And for the smarties out there:

www.macrochan.org
2013-06-13 11:43:49 AM
1 votes:

Farking Canuck: I'd give her a reality bump, if ya know what I mean, and I think you do.

Congratz ... you officially just wore that meme out.


Kate Upton is a peach. Like when you eat a peach that is so ripe you can push your thumb through the skin. The juice runs down your chin and drips onto your chest, and in between your fingers it gets so sticky you have trouble separating them. The next day, even after you wash your hands, you can still smell the sweet juice on your skin and, if no one is watching, you lick your fingers and the memory of that sweet fruit on your tongue floods back. Kate is like that.
2013-06-13 11:23:54 AM
1 votes:

Magnanimous_J: Upton is ALMOST perfect, but that almost is what makes her real. You could see her float tubing down a river drinking a couple beers.


I can? How do I arrange this?

Jennifer Lawrence benefits from a similar "reality bump".
2013-06-13 11:19:10 AM
1 votes:

kab: Very pretty girl, no question.   But I can't say that she's deserving of the amount of interweb adoration she receives for said looks.

/not sure if that falls into studman territory, but oh well.



It only counts as studmanning if you purposely try to disempower a woman with your dismissive comments. I think you're safe on this one.


I think the appeal of Kate Upton is her contrast against her peers. Most of the top tier models are almost extraterrestrialy beautiful, flawless and graceful and perfect in every physical way. Upton is ALMOST perfect, but that almost is what makes her real. You could see her float tubing down a river drinking a couple beers. You could see her tripping over a carpet and taking out a floor lamp. Whereas someone like Adrianna Lima might as well be a CGI composite of perfect human genetics. One is a mile out of your league, the other might as well be on the moon.
2013-06-13 11:17:50 AM
1 votes:
Meh
2013-06-13 10:30:03 AM
1 votes:

brap: Now for another exciting edition of the internet's favorite existential sexually themed game show   SHE NEITHER KNOWS NOR CARES OF YOUR EXISTENCE!


Let's get started, you know how to play, we show you barely clothed uberwealthy supermodelss that travel waaaaay outside of your social circles and the first contestant that is reduced to sobbing into their crusty sock wins valuable prizes and caloric snack treats!


i1282.photobucket.com
2013-06-13 10:28:54 AM
1 votes:
headline of the year
2013-06-13 10:20:49 AM
1 votes:

indarwinsshadow: DubyaHater: indarwinsshadow: DubyaHater: stoli n coke: STUDMEN69 ASSEMBLE!

Overweight
Weird torso
Love handles
No ass
Chicken legs

[i2.photobucket.com image 182x202]

It's like you're walking around with a "kick me in the nuts" sign taped to your forhead. Ever heard the saying "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all"? No? Well, now you have.

She still won't sleep with you. I know it keeps you up night, wondering what you can do on the internet to catch the attention of Miss Upton. Keep white knighting though. It makes you look really cool in the eyes of a bunch of anonymous Farkers

Awww. Now I've upset you. Sorry muffin. I keep forgetting how sensitive some people are. Here's a cookie. I'll call your mom and she'll come and pick you up so you don't have to hear the taunts no mores. Poor snowflake.
She wouldn't sleep with you, me or probably any farker. Pointing out when you're acting like a tool isn't being a white knight. It's just pointing out you're acting like a child. Live with it.





You're right. I expressed my opinion and was immediately chastised for it. Anyone with differing opinions should just keep quiet in your presence or risk "being kicked in the nuts". And yet I'm acting like a child. Good luck with that attitude.
2013-06-13 10:07:54 AM
1 votes:

Halstread: Those are not flattering pictures, IMO.  I thought she was less rectangular from the boobs down, alas this is not the case.


She's out of shape.
/you had ONE JOB
2013-06-13 10:06:14 AM
1 votes:
Those are not flattering pictures, IMO.  I thought she was less rectangular from the boobs down, alas this is not the case.
2013-06-13 09:46:21 AM
1 votes:
soshitech.files.wordpress.com
2013-06-13 09:40:14 AM
1 votes:

oldfarthenry: I wonder when her tits will demand top billing - as in `The Breasts of Kate Upton"?


Her breasts will be opening for Katy Perry's tits this weekend at the cove.
2013-06-13 09:30:16 AM
1 votes:
Subby:

assets0.ordienetworks.com
2013-06-13 09:29:33 AM
1 votes:

oldfarthenry: I wonder when her tits will demand top billing - as in `The Breasts of Kate Upton"?


There is an intermediate step that must be taken: Kate Upton featuring The Breasts

Thick through the middle. Flat on the back. Kate Upton is still the second hottest woman in history, trailing only Rachel Weisz in The Mummy.
2013-06-13 09:03:25 AM
1 votes:

stoli n coke: STUDMEN69 ASSEMBLE!


She does have a weird torso.

/wouldn't stop me from  hitting masturbating to it
2013-06-13 08:55:40 AM
1 votes:
STUDMEN69 ASSEMBLE!
 
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