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(CF News 13)   Good news, Florida: There are no vampire mosquitoes. You can put away your tiny stakes and crosses   (cfnews13.com) divider line 37
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2923 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jun 2013 at 7:38 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-12 07:41:40 PM  
Aren't all mosquitoes vampires?

a bloodsucking predator with a bite than hurts worse than no other.

*twitch*
 
2013-06-12 07:41:53 PM  
How about zombie mosquitoes?  Zombies are still cool, right?  We're not sick of zombie everything yet?

/ ...And bacon
// Delicious, but simply beaten to death.
/// Slashies!
 
2013-06-12 07:42:12 PM  
No sparkly skeeters?
 
2013-06-12 07:43:24 PM  
Pretty sure Prick Scott fits the category - he is sucking the life out of the state.
 
2013-06-12 07:50:07 PM  
Yep. The link on fark Monday said it was 20x larger than a regular mosquito. The pic in linked article made the article writer look retarded.
www.cfnews13.com
 
2013-06-12 07:52:35 PM  
More hysterical headlines from the media? Say it isn't so.
 
2013-06-12 07:52:59 PM  
"The researchers say county mosquito control offices, including Brevard County, are getting swamped with calls about the insects -- diverting their attention from spraying for mosquitos. "

Because the same guy who sprays also answers the phones? Or if so, just stop answering and go spray!

fusillade762: Aren't all mosquitoes vampires?

a bloodsucking predator with a bite than hurts worse than no other.

*twitch*



/agree, it's almost as if proof reading has become illegal
 
2013-06-12 07:55:53 PM  
How about crazy mosquitoes, that make you long for the days of the fire mosquitoes
 
2013-06-12 08:00:48 PM  
I'd hate to be the mosquito to have to explain this to all the vapid, sullen, boring female mosquitoes.
 
2013-06-12 08:06:14 PM  
The mosquitoes flying around my house are as mean and hard to kill as vampires.
 
2013-06-12 08:20:51 PM  

Gyrfalcon: The mosquitoes flying around my house are as mean and hard to kill as vampires.


My first year abroad at boarding school, there were so many mosquitoes in my room (no AC, no screen on the balcony) that by the time I had narrowed their numbers down (and woken up the entire hotel), the walls and ceiling looked like there had been a homicidal home invasion.  This would be a nightly occurrence until late September.  Right about the time the cockroaches would start seeking warmth.
 
2013-06-12 08:22:13 PM  
Florida just has regular old run of the mill mosquitoes its just that they have fed on so much tourist blood that they are now large enough to track on radar and be engaged by triple A,
 
2013-06-12 08:29:29 PM  

fusillade762: Aren't all mosquitoes vampires?


Only females, who need blood to produce eggs for some reason.  Both sexes also feed on nectar.
 
2013-06-12 08:30:33 PM  
Up here in northwest Florida the mosquitoes have not been so bad this year because of a month long drought.
However, this is the worst year in twenty years for yellow flies (called deer flies, dog flies and horse flies elsewhere). A cloud of those bastards will drive you indoors and make you wear heavy clothes in the heat when you go out.
 
2013-06-12 08:33:50 PM  

Pribar: Florida just has regular old run of the mill mosquitoes its just that they have fed on so much tourist blood that they are now large enough to track on radar and be engaged by triple A,


They probably taste like movie popcorn and rum.
 
2013-06-12 08:40:43 PM  
They haven't played Plague Inc., obviously.

Wait, there is no Vampire level yet.

Get on it, Ndemic!!!!
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2013-06-12 08:42:54 PM  
fusillade762: Aren't all mosquitoes vampires?

Almost all. The genus Toxorhynchites does not drink blood. It is carnivorous as a larva instead.
 
2013-06-12 09:07:19 PM  
The picture of the squito is too clear.  If they had come across a giant vampire squito the picture of it would be blurry, just like Big Foot and UFO's.  Those are blurry too.  I bet if someone gave Big Foot a good pair of glasses, he would not be blurry anymore.  But then again, if he did have glasses, nobody would want to take a picture of him anymore.
 
2013-06-12 09:11:53 PM  

thamike: Pribar: Florida just has regular old run of the mill mosquitoes its just that they have fed on so much tourist blood that they are now large enough to track on radar and be engaged by triple A,

They probably taste like movie popcorn and rum.


The mosquitoes or the tourists?
 
2013-06-12 09:25:21 PM  

ZAZ: fusillade762: Aren't all mosquitoes vampires?

Almost all. The genus Toxorhynchites does not drink blood. It is carnivorous as a larva instead.


Cannibal mosquitoes.
 
2013-06-12 09:35:54 PM  

SwiftFox: ZAZ: fusillade762: Aren't all mosquitoes vampires?

Almost all. The genus Toxorhynchites does not drink blood. It is carnivorous as a larva instead.

Cannibal mosquitoes.


ZOMBIE MOSQUITOES!


mikewadestr: The picture of the squito is too clear.  If they had come across a giant vampire squito the picture of it would be blurry, just like Big Foot and UFO's.  Those are blurry too.  I bet if someone gave Big Foot a good pair of glasses, he would not be blurry anymore.  But then again, if he did have glasses, nobody would want to take a picture of him anymore.


I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is blurry, and that's extra scary to me. There's a large, out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside. Run, he's fuzzy, get out of here!
 
2013-06-12 09:38:49 PM  
Those vampire stories are true. I got bit by one of those big mosquitos, had to be put on a morphine pump, and had a 5 gallon blood transfusion. It took 10 stitches to close the bite wound.

/not really, but you already knew that
 
2013-06-12 10:20:39 PM  
Sounds like an SNL Fox and Friends fact check:
"There are no vampire mosquitoes in Florida"
 
2013-06-12 11:05:07 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-06-12 11:08:15 PM  
tfa: They add there's no reason for anyone to cancel their Florida vacation due to these bugs.

The reason for the article.
 
2013-06-12 11:25:09 PM  
What about reverse vampire mosquitoes!?!?
 
2013-06-13 12:20:25 AM  
From Prairie Home Companion: the mosquitoes in Minnesota are frightening. If you're not careful the might carry off your small pet. People carry around crucifixes which might actually kill the little bloodsuckers depending on how hard you hit them with it.
 
2013-06-13 01:38:33 AM  
I've seen them.  In fact, I killed on in my dining room last night.  No joke.
 
2013-06-13 02:42:16 AM  

Astorix: More hysterical headlines from the media? Say it isn't so.


Yes, and I blame The Daily Mail and FARK.

I'd be more concerned with the mosquitoes spreading heartworms to your pets than anything more.
 
2013-06-13 03:48:05 AM  
Or can you...?

i.imgur.com
 
2013-06-13 05:15:45 AM  

WTFDYW: Yep. The link on fark Monday said it was 20x larger than a regular mosquito. The pic in linked article made the article writer look retarded.
[www.cfnews13.com image 676x456]


That picture is not comforting.  Not at all.  And I could see that thing weighing 20x as much as a regular mosquito.
 
2013-06-13 06:32:55 AM  
www.cfnews13.com

I especially like the way one mosquito is held sideways, the other face-on, so as to distort their relative sizes.
 
2013-06-13 07:29:30 AM  
If it keeps the dang tourists out of my state, it's a good thing.  Wait until they hear about the 5-liter skeeter...
 
2013-06-13 08:28:48 AM  
FTFA: "This idea that Florida, or that this mosquito poses a threat to anyone in Florida is preposterous," said Tabachnick.

If you think it's "preposterous" that Florida might pose a threat to anyone in Florida, you must not read Fark.
 
2013-06-13 11:13:23 AM  

varmitydog: Up here in northwest Florida the mosquitoes have not been so bad this year because of a month long drought.
However, this is the worst year in twenty years for yellow flies (called deer flies, dog flies and horse flies elsewhere). A cloud of those bastards will drive you indoors and make you wear heavy clothes in the heat when you go out.


Sadly, drought means that there probably won't be much of a Tupelo honey crop this season.
 
2013-06-13 01:43:48 PM  
I'm keeping the spray bottle of holy water. It still works on vampire cats.
 
2013-06-13 01:49:24 PM  

Habitual Cynic: If it keeps the dang tourists out of my state, it's a good thing.  Wait until they hear about the 5-liter skeeter...


I'm thinking that if sharks, Burmese pythons, Asian cockroaches, and land crabs eating out of the dog's dish in your back yard don't keep the tourists away, you'd better get used to tourists. Florida--where God dumps mistakes even he can't kill.

Here's what really scares away tourists:

* SARS
* expensive beer
* extreme weather events.

Good luck!
 
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