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(Edmonton Journal)   New app would allow you to snitch on illegal parkers, and get rewarded with a cut of the fine. It will also become commonplace to beat people to a pulp if they're caught using said app   (edmontonjournal.com) divider line 199
    More: Stupid, handicapped parking, website designers  
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6052 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jun 2013 at 6:42 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-12 05:19:04 PM  
So don't get caught.
 
2013-06-12 05:26:19 PM  
It will also become commonplace to beat people to a pulp if they're caught using said app

So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

This is no different than CrimeStoppers or 222-TIPS. Those people get a reward for any information leading to arrests of individuals who broke the law.

Don't want to get a fine for illegally parking? Don't illegally park. I got some douchebag's car in my apartment complex towed because he insisted on double-parking his ugly truck over two handicapped spots (no placard of course). First I put a sign on his window saying "Stupidity is not a handicap. Park here again and I'll make sure it's towed." He challenged it so I called the office and watched as a tow truck came and picked it up.
 
2013-06-12 05:32:07 PM  

scottydoesntknow: So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.


Everybody follows it, even if they say they don't. It's a hardwired thing.
 
2013-06-12 05:40:01 PM  
around here, I'd make a fortune ratting out people using handicapped parking spaces without proper tags.
 
2013-06-12 05:48:06 PM  

ManateeGag: around here, I'd make a fortune ratting out people using handicapped parking spaces without proper tags.


I would be happy to get some of the fine. $500 bucks here.
Beats blocking them in while I unload my wheelchair and making them wait until I'm done shopping.
 
2013-06-12 05:55:00 PM  
We are building a finking force of extraordinary magnitude
 
2013-06-12 06:00:04 PM  
I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

That, and some sort of law allowing me to run down people who leave their shopping carts in the middle of parking lots. Those two things are all I ask.
 
2013-06-12 06:02:07 PM  
Who needs an app? Greasing the door handle is pretty satisfying on it's own.
 
2013-06-12 06:05:12 PM  

doglover: scottydoesntknow: So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

Everybody follows it, even if they say they don't. It's a hardwired thing.


No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again. If you're an entitled douchebag, yes, you get mad at the person who reported you because you obviously operate under the misguided assumption that "everything is legal if you don't get caught."
 
2013-06-12 06:09:50 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again.


But if someone only takes up one parking space, someone might dent the door on his 1998 Accord. Even worse, that person might have to walk an extra five feet to get into the store.
 
2013-06-12 06:10:08 PM  
Snitches get riches.
 
2013-06-12 06:12:19 PM  

crotchgrabber: Who needs an app? Greasing the door handle is pretty satisfying on it's own.


I don't usually carry grease with me.
 
2013-06-12 06:16:28 PM  

GreenAdder: Mitch Taylor's Bro: No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again.

But if someone only takes up one parking space, someone might dent the door on his 1998 Accord. Even worse, that person might have to walk an extra five feet to get into the store.


Judging from this website, this might actually be a worse problem than I first suspected.

http://iparklikeanass.com/
 
2013-06-12 06:17:29 PM  

doglover: scottydoesntknow: So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

Everybody follows it, even if they say they don't. It's a hardwired thing.


Appers get slappers?
 
2013-06-12 06:18:07 PM  

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: Snitches get riches.


Hmmm, I wonder if I could write off a D800 with a 500mm lens as a business expense? "Hello, Adorama? You're going to love me for this. Got a pen handy?"
 
2013-06-12 06:20:27 PM  

jehovahs witness protection: ManateeGag: around here, I'd make a fortune ratting out people using handicapped parking spaces without proper tags.

I would be happy to get some of the fine. $500 bucks here.
Beats blocking them in while I unload my wheelchair and making them wait until I'm done shopping.


You made me remember something from like 30-ish years ago - I worked in a retail store, and there was this one twit who loved to park his car sideways across two handicap spots while he went shopping. Young, healthy guy who made a point of showing off his muscles. Totally ignored the signs warning of a large fine (I think it was like $250 + community service or something).

One day a guy pulled in behind him with a special van for a person in a wheelchair, obviously someone with complex issues - took them like 15 minutes to get the chair out, help the person into it, do various.. stuff... but in any case, aforementioned d-bag started panicking after about 5 minutes because a parking scooter was visible in the distance, slooooooowly working it's way closer. He was pleading with the people in the van to pleeeaase allow him to move, but with a lot of bemused people around including some that obviously knew him, he was doing it politery and totally ineffectively.

Anyhow, eventually the parking lady arrived, and spent no less than 10 minutes lecturing the d-bag, while a cop arrived who obviously determined that there was some other issue (I'm guessing outstanding parking tickets), meaning d-bag's car was getting towed. Sadly this was before cellphone cams (probably too early for even the big camcorders) or the sight of Mr. Roid Rage in tears as his sweet ride was dragged over the huge speed bumps would have been epic youtube stuff.
 
2013-06-12 06:23:23 PM  

MisterTweak: jehovahs witness protection: ManateeGag: around here, I'd make a fortune ratting out people using handicapped parking spaces without proper tags.

I would be happy to get some of the fine. $500 bucks here.
Beats blocking them in while I unload my wheelchair and making them wait until I'm done shopping.

You made me remember something from like 30-ish years ago - I worked in a retail store, and there was this one twit who loved to park his car sideways across two handicap spots while he went shopping. Young, healthy guy who made a point of showing off his muscles. Totally ignored the signs warning of a large fine (I think it was like $250 + community service or something).

One day a guy pulled in behind him with a special van for a person in a wheelchair, obviously someone with complex issues - took them like 15 minutes to get the chair out, help the person into it, do various.. stuff... but in any case, aforementioned d-bag started panicking after about 5 minutes because a parking scooter was visible in the distance, slooooooowly working it's way closer. He was pleading with the people in the van to pleeeaase allow him to move, but with a lot of bemused people around including some that obviously knew him, he was doing it politery and totally ineffectively.

Anyhow, eventually the parking lady arrived, and spent no less than 10 minutes lecturing the d-bag, while a cop arrived who obviously determined that there was some other issue (I'm guessing outstanding parking tickets), meaning d-bag's car was getting towed. Sadly this was before cellphone cams (probably too early for even the big camcorders) or the sight of Mr. Roid Rage in tears as his sweet ride was dragged over the huge speed bumps would have been epic youtube stuff.


Polaroids or it didn't happen.
 
2013-06-12 06:29:17 PM  
WINNIPEG

*stops reading*
 
2013-06-12 06:45:44 PM  
I bet you could scout out some sweet spots that aren't marked well and make bank by just keeping an eye on them
 
2013-06-12 06:46:50 PM  
I don't want a piece of any fine. I just want the asshats I work with to stop taking up two spots with one car.
 
2013-06-12 06:47:40 PM  
Won't work if the illegal parker is a limo.  No cut for you.
 
2013-06-12 06:48:16 PM  
Parking douchebaggery is a pet peeve of mine.
 
2013-06-12 06:48:26 PM  

scottydoesntknow: It will also become commonplace to beat people to a pulp if they're caught using said app

So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

This is no different than CrimeStoppers or 222-TIPS. Those people get a reward for any information leading to arrests of individuals who broke the law.

Don't want to get a fine for illegally parking? Don't illegally park. I got some douchebag's car in my apartment complex towed because he insisted on double-parking his ugly truck over two handicapped spots (no placard of course). First I put a sign on his window saying "Stupidity is not a handicap. Park here again and I'll make sure it's towed." He challenged it so I called the office and watched as a tow truck came and picked it up.


Putting a sign on his window exposes you to an awful lot of risk, as you may be spotted doing so, and the kind of person who does this kind of thing may well be the kind of person who responds violently.  This was a bad call.

Instead, you should have just firebombed it from a distance.  Molotov cocktails solve all sorts of problems.
 
2013-06-12 06:49:11 PM  
It occurs to me that someone with photoshop skills could use this to keep the parking authority busy running around the city like chickens with their heads cut off. Not that I'm suggesting such a thing, of course. My brain is just in its "how could this possibly backfire in spectacular fashion" default mode.
 
2013-06-12 06:50:06 PM  
I get to screw over douchebags AND make bank? Win/win, subtard
 
2013-06-12 06:50:30 PM  
I can't wait till the first beatdown happens because somebody catches a pig parked illegally
 
2013-06-12 06:50:35 PM  
The followup to this story will be in a month or so with "45 people shot to death this month for snitching on illegal parkers, program revoked in the interest of public safety."
 
2013-06-12 06:52:53 PM  
I hate parking scofflaws as much as the next guy, as I make the effort, and do, 97% of the time, park legally. OTOH, I hate the idea of breeding, with positive reinforcement, a farking Stasi society of reality-Tv-fed informers out to stab the first guy they find in the back.

/I should mention that I think humanity is doomed anyway.
//Stasi and reality-Tv in same sentence
///have I said fark me?
 
2013-06-12 06:54:39 PM  

TommyymmoT: crotchgrabber: Who needs an app? Greasing the door handle is pretty satisfying on it's own.

I don't usually carry grease with me.


I don't either, but I do seem to have an endless supply of a certain sticky substance that I think would be a good substitute.
 
2013-06-12 06:54:51 PM  

NickelP: I bet you could scout out some sweet spots that aren't marked well and make bank by just keeping an eye on them


Much like in bottle return states, I expect a cottage industry to pop up where homeless people scour the city for illegally parked cars.

/bonus points for the new brand of car thief that steals a car and then illegally parks it so they can collect when it is ticketed
 
2013-06-12 06:55:03 PM  

Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.


Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.
 
2013-06-12 06:55:14 PM  

apoptotic: It occurs to me that someone with photoshop skills could use this to keep the parking authority busy running around the city like chickens with their heads cut off. Not that I'm suggesting such a thing, of course. My brain is just in its "how could this possibly backfire in spectacular fashion" default mode.


UFOs
Lolcats
Famous cars from movies

And then, eventually, a sausagefest
 
2013-06-12 06:56:21 PM  

FatherChaos: The followup to this story will be in a month or so with "45 people shot to death this month for snitching on illegal parkers, program revoked in the interest of public safety."


and every time we'll all chime in about how nice it is to hear from responsible gun owners.  Every time.
 
2013-06-12 06:59:11 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: GreenAdder: Mitch Taylor's Bro: No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again.

But if someone only takes up one parking space, someone might dent the door on his 1998 Accord. Even worse, that person might have to walk an extra five feet to get into the store.

Judging from this website, this might actually be a worse problem than I first suspected.

http://iparklikeanass.com/


I was walking back to my office after getting a mocha from next door and saw a late model BMW parked in multiple spaces in my company parking lot.  While I stood having a smoke with a co-worker and chatting, the owner came back from the store next door.  I made a comment about people who can't park and he replied, "if you had a car this nice, you'd park like this, too."  I said, "My car is newer, cost more, and I don't park like a douche.  If I see your car parked in this reserved lot again, you better hope the worse that happens is it gets towed."  He didn't say a word.  Just got in and drove away.

I actually didn't care that he parked in the company lot.  It was near the end of the day and there were plenty of spaces.  But I despise self-entitled assholes who think they are special.
 
2013-06-12 07:00:54 PM  
imokwiththis.jpg

Way too many people abuse parking and HOV laws. It's way too easy to obtain a driver's license, and the state of this nation's drivers is proof of this.
 
2013-06-12 07:02:25 PM  
I've needed another revenue stream for a while now,

This is perfect!
 
2013-06-12 07:02:31 PM  
Ah yes, Fark, where people are all lawbreakers, except for the things that annoy them personally must be faced with the death penalty.
 
2013-06-12 07:03:04 PM  
Will this app let me call the street painters to come paint a handicapped sign under someone's car while it's parked? Because if not I'm going to be much less motivated to help collect fines.
 
2013-06-12 07:03:09 PM  
Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?
 
2013-06-12 07:03:24 PM  
www.killsometime.com
I'm okay with this.
 
2013-06-12 07:03:50 PM  

Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

That, and some sort of law allowing me to run down people who leave their shopping carts in the middle of parking lots. Those two things are all I ask.


Agreed, plus people that use handicap spots who don't have the wheelie sticker.  Could we also start ticketing the douchbags that take up four parking spots at once in a parking lot?
 
2013-06-12 07:04:59 PM  

toraque: scottydoesntknow: It will also become commonplace to beat people to a pulp if they're caught using said app

So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

This is no different than CrimeStoppers or 222-TIPS. Those people get a reward for any information leading to arrests of individuals who broke the law.

Don't want to get a fine for illegally parking? Don't illegally park. I got some douchebag's car in my apartment complex towed because he insisted on double-parking his ugly truck over two handicapped spots (no placard of course). First I put a sign on his window saying "Stupidity is not a handicap. Park here again and I'll make sure it's towed." He challenged it so I called the office and watched as a tow truck came and picked it up.

Putting a sign on his window exposes you to an awful lot of risk, as you may be spotted doing so, and the kind of person who does this kind of thing may well be the kind of person who responds violently.  This was a bad call.

Instead, you should have just firebombed it from a distance.  Molotov cocktails solve all sorts of problems.


You are correct. When attending college, my parking permit was stolen. The thief actually parked his vehicle in the same lot that I used, and I left a sign on his vehicle that read "THIEF". In hindsight, I should not have left the sign; instead, I should have used a crowbar to destroy his windows and slashed his tires.
 
2013-06-12 07:05:36 PM  

Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?


Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.
 
2013-06-12 07:06:17 PM  

clintster: [www.killsometime.com image 450x600]
I'm okay with this.


Yes. Chalk is often a good thing to keep at the ready, apparently.
i.imgur.com
i.imgur.com
 
2013-06-12 07:06:30 PM  
A condominium that I used to live at would tow your car away if any portion of it was touching or over the white lines of either side of your assigned space.
 
2013-06-12 07:06:39 PM  
Something tells me none of our neighbors in CA have honking huge P.B.A. placard badges taking up a good portion of the driver's side window as seen in NJ USA. Held in place by three suction cups due to immense size, these special tagged vehicles are typically piloted by the rudest rule bending drivers who park wherever the hell they want. Being a dooshbag: It's part of the privilege of having a friend in law enforcement.

/ if i had something on my windshield 1/2 the size of a PBA crest i'd be ticketed for obstruction of view.
 
2013-06-12 07:06:59 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: MisterTweak: jehovahs witness protection: ManateeGag: around here, I'd make a fortune ratting out people using handicapped parking spaces without proper tags.

I would be happy to get some of the fine. $500 bucks here.
Beats blocking them in while I unload my wheelchair and making them wait until I'm done shopping.

You made me remember something from like 30-ish years ago - I worked in a retail store, and there was this one twit who loved to park his car sideways across two handicap spots while he went shopping. Young, healthy guy who made a point of showing off his muscles. Totally ignored the signs warning of a large fine (I think it was like $250 + community service or something).

One day a guy pulled in behind him with a special van for a person in a wheelchair, obviously someone with complex issues - took them like 15 minutes to get the chair out, help the person into it, do various.. stuff... but in any case, aforementioned d-bag started panicking after about 5 minutes because a parking scooter was visible in the distance, slooooooowly working it's way closer. He was pleading with the people in the van to pleeeaase allow him to move, but with a lot of bemused people around including some that obviously knew him, he was doing it politery and totally ineffectively.

Anyhow, eventually the parking lady arrived, and spent no less than 10 minutes lecturing the d-bag, while a cop arrived who obviously determined that there was some other issue (I'm guessing outstanding parking tickets), meaning d-bag's car was getting towed. Sadly this was before cellphone cams (probably too early for even the big camcorders) or the sight of Mr. Roid Rage in tears as his sweet ride was dragged over the huge speed bumps would have been epic youtube stuff.

Polaroids or it didn't happen.


And you know you can't just ripped those up, you have to burn them.
 
2013-06-12 07:07:09 PM  
As a graduate student (read: POOR) in a college town, this would be sorely, sorely tempting...
 
2013-06-12 07:08:15 PM  

scottydoesntknow: First I put a sign on his window saying "Stupidity is not a handicap. Park here again and I'll make sure it's towed." He challenged it so I called the office and watched as a tow truck came and picked it up.


When I was an undergrad, I lived in an apartment ~a block off campus. The lot was clearly marked "ALL SPACES ASSIGNED, UNAUTHORIZED VEHICLES WILL BE TOWED."

The night before game day, a couple guys who had assigned spots would all park at a friend's place (way east of town). At first they did this to make a couple bucks letting football fans park in their spots, but after a while fans started just parking there early and after the fun of watching a few assholes get towed, it kind of became far more valuable than the $5 they were charging for their spot. Eventually we kind of made it a cookout sort of affair, watch a bunch of beemers get towed and then fire up the grill at the last 2 minute warning, so we would all be out when five or six illiterates came back and found their cars gone.

Good times.
 
2013-06-12 07:08:23 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.


Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.
 
2013-06-12 07:08:48 PM  

Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes,



My lawyer has advised me not to comment on the matter.
 
2013-06-12 07:10:26 PM  
Parking at my university is a huge pain in the ass.

Gotta love coming in to work (I work the night shift), and finding that a good third of the parking spaces in the Faculty/Staff lots are taken up by students or visitors by 5:30pm.  The lots don't open up for general use until 6pm.  I would happily use this if people would start parking elsewhere, so I don't need to come in so early to hunt for a parking space.
 
2013-06-12 07:11:01 PM  

Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.


Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.
 
2013-06-12 07:12:11 PM  

Dimensio: I should have used a crowbar to destroy his windows and slashed his tires.

get that permit back.
 
2013-06-12 07:12:13 PM  
people that double park suck, I do not like them.  But people that call cops with any message other than "HELP!", truly deserve physical violence, and/or vicious vandalism.
 
2013-06-12 07:12:22 PM  

Gulper Eel: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.


I have considered buying a GoPro and mounting it somewhere on my car so I could document some of the BS I see on my relatively short commute. Maybe one on the back, too, for tailgaters. I could produce some kind of "Tosh.0" but focused solely on bad drivers.
 
2013-06-12 07:13:17 PM  
 
2013-06-12 07:13:26 PM  

unlikely: Dimensio: I should have used a crowbar to destroy his windows and slashed his tires. get that permit back.


The permit had already been invalidated. Destroying the thief's car would have served only vengeance. While the incident occurred nearly ten years ago, I still regret not taking the action.
 
2013-06-12 07:13:29 PM  

badLogic: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

That, and some sort of law allowing me to run down people who leave their shopping carts in the middle of parking lots. Those two things are all I ask.

Agreed, plus people that use handicap spots who don't have the wheelie sticker.  Could we also start ticketing the douchbags that take up four parking spots at once in a parking lot?


I pulled into a convenience store and some guy pulled his VW Van (old school) into the handicapped parking at the same time.  I made it a point to check for a handicapped placard or plates, then commented that the space was reserved.  He started yelling "how do you know I'm not handicapped!"  I told him, "if you were, you'd have the proper plates, but I'm willing to accept that you suffer from severe brain damage."  He tried to act threatening, but I just stood there laughing at him.
 
2013-06-12 07:14:18 PM  

SilentStrider: I don't want a piece of any fine. I just want the asshats I work with to stop taking up two spots with one car.


We only park that way so people like you dont ding the doors of our sweet sweet rides.

/ 96 Astro
 
2013-06-12 07:15:18 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.

Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.


Beg to differ: an able-bodied person parking in a handicapped spot is as low as you can possibly get.

I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.
 
2013-06-12 07:15:34 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: Gulper Eel: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.

I have considered buying a GoPro and mounting it somewhere on my car so I could document some of the BS I see on my relatively short commute. Maybe one on the back, too, for tailgaters. I could produce some kind of "Tosh.0" but focused solely on bad drivers.


I've wanted to get one of those small scrolling marquees you see at Office Depot for my back window. Put some pre-programmed lines in there like "Get off my ass dickhead" or "Left lane for passing only moron!" (and of course "thank you" when they're nice). That way I could voice my full opinion, more than just a finger can convey.
 
2013-06-12 07:16:09 PM  
See, the chalk-made special parking spot is the way to go. That way if d-bag owner comes out and wants to fight, you'll get what you want.

People that take pictures to snitch are no better than the assholes that park shiatty. Equally passive-agressive, equally pussies.
 
2013-06-12 07:16:32 PM  
First-world people problem, car people problem, or city people probles?
 
2013-06-12 07:17:21 PM  
The downtown business association in my town has repeatedly campaigned against any kind of paid parking or time limit in the downtown, They know it will drive business to Walmart or Target.

And those wealthy pricks in town council keeps trying and trying to bring it in, just because they love inflicting punishment (they of course can get their parking tickets "fixed",)
 
2013-06-12 07:17:51 PM  

doglover: scottydoesntknow: So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

Everybody follows it, even if they say they don't. It's a hardwired thing.


no asshole, we dont
bullies do ... guess we know who you are ...
 
2013-06-12 07:17:53 PM  

KrispyKritter: if i had something on my windshield 1/2 the size of a PBA crest i'd be ticketed for obstruction of view.


Under a strict interpretation of New York State's motor vehicle laws, you're technically not even allowed to have a rear view mirror that's affixed only to the windshield.

I'm fine with increased enforcement of the existing safety laws, especially if I can get a cut of the revenue by participating.

But first, let's do something about the people who double park along the avenue, forcing motorists to slalom back and forth across the double yellow line just to get from point A to point B.
 
2013-06-12 07:18:22 PM  

Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.

Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.

Beg to differ: an able-bodied person parking in a handicapped spot is as low as you can possibly get.

I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.


So you lower yourself to their level? Call a tow truck and have them yank it away. Maybe you'll get a cherry on top if they happen to damage it when it's being hooked up. Then they're on the hook for towing costs and damage.
 
2013-06-12 07:18:50 PM  

OgreMagi: But I despise self-entitled assholes who think they are special.


Basically, this!

Sometimes you can tell that there's a kind of innocent domino effect going on: one car parks a little too close to the line, and every other car has to adjust until everything is kind of askew. Other times, someone is truly concerned about their vehicle, parks as far away from others as possible and walks farther to hopefully protect his/her vehicle from parking lot dings and scratches. Then there are those farksticks like you encountered.
 
2013-06-12 07:19:03 PM  
The quickest way to find out if someone is a total arse is to get in a car with them driving. Most arseholes can hide it for a while in normal conversation but when driving and parking, the camouflage disappears. When dating someone new I always come up with a reason early on why they need to drive just so I can see if they're worth continuing with.

/And yet the vast majority thinks they're above average
 
2013-06-12 07:19:43 PM  

Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

That, and some sort of law allowing me to run down people who leave their shopping carts in the middle of parking lots. Those two things are all I ask.


Me too.
 
2013-06-12 07:21:25 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: Gulper Eel: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.

I have considered buying a GoPro and mounting it somewhere on my car so I could document some of the BS I see on my relatively short commute. Maybe one on the back, too, for tailgaters. I could produce some kind of "Tosh.0" but focused solely on bad drivers.


Tosh seems like the snitch type too. go for it, it may work.
 
2013-06-12 07:21:53 PM  
<i>Some entrepreneurial Winnipeggers are set to unleash an army of bounty hunters keen on nabbing <b>people who park in disabled parking spots without a permit or in front of a fire hydrant</b>. </i>

Yea... what sort of monster would report such fine, upstanding citizens....

Toss in idiots who double-park and I'd support an app that lets you call in an airstrike on the farkers.
 
2013-06-12 07:22:02 PM  

Smelly Pirate Hooker: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

That, and some sort of law allowing me to run down people who leave their shopping carts in the middle of parking lots. Those two things are all I ask.

Me too.


How about make it legal to run over those entire families who walk slowly down the middle of the driveway of a parking lot while a line of cars is stuck behind them.
 
2013-06-12 07:23:22 PM  

SilentStrider: I don't want a piece of any fine. I just want the asshats I work with to stop taking up two spots with one car.


This.

I wouldn't do it myself, but if someone else took it upon himself or herself to firebomb cars parked in this manner, I wouldn't be too upset about it.
 
2013-06-12 07:23:57 PM  

Skywolf the Scribbler: First-world people problem, car people problem, or city people probles?


not a problem at all
except for tards who park illegally ...
so once again, not a problem at all
 
2013-06-12 07:24:24 PM  
I spit on their door/windshield.
 
2013-06-12 07:25:21 PM  

Uncle_Sam's_Titties: See, the chalk-made special parking spot is the way to go. That way if d-bag owner comes out and wants to fight, you'll get what you want.

People that take pictures to snitch are no better than the assholes that park shiatty. Equally passive-agressive, equally pussies.


agreed.
 
2013-06-12 07:25:55 PM  

FatherChaos: The followup to this story will be in a month or so with "45 people shot to death this month for snitching on illegal parkers, program revoked in the interest of public safety."


Hate to break it to you, but government types typically frown on people who even so much as spit in the direction of informants.  They use terms like "aggravating factors" and other things that tend to make stretches in the pen longer.
 
2013-06-12 07:26:06 PM  
But it's for safety!  A cut of the loot is merely a token for your time and concern.
 
2013-06-12 07:27:02 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.

So you lower yourself to their level? Call a tow truck and have them yank it away. Maybe you'll get a cherry on top if they happen to damage it when it's being hooked up. Then they're on the hook for towing costs and damage.


I don't think it's "lowering myself" to their level at all. In my experience, that's mostly a rhetorical instrument. I don't even agree with the premise.

The world would be better with a little more street justice.
 
2013-06-12 07:28:19 PM  
Snitch on someone that is illegally parked?  Good.  Get paid to do it?  Farkin' Awesome.
 
2013-06-12 07:28:35 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: So don't get caught.


Or, you know, go to a parking garage.
 
2013-06-12 07:28:45 PM  
Every Walmart needs 40 Handicapped spaces.  Because.
 
2013-06-12 07:29:54 PM  

Day_Old_Dutchie: The downtown business association in my town has repeatedly campaigned against any kind of paid parking or time limit in the downtown, They know it will drive business to Walmart or Target.

And those wealthy pricks in town council keeps trying and trying to bring it in, just because they love inflicting punishment (they of course can get their parking tickets "fixed",)


Those businesses are already dead, they just don't know it yet. They died the day the city allowed big box stores into town. Time limits actual can be good for downtown businesses since it keeps people from parking there all day using up spots that could be used for customers who only need to be in the shop for half an hour or so.

scottydoesntknow: Put some pre-programmed lines in there like "Get off my ass dickhead"


I thought about wiring up a switch under the dash that would turn on my brake lights when I wasn't really braking to scare off tailgaters. I don't like to actually brake since they might not be paying attention and slam into me. With the light switch, they'd instinctively back off (even if slowly) without risking a collision. But I'm sure it's illegal as hell and would make me liable for the tailgater swerving or freaking out some other dangerous way when they see brake lights and think they can't slow down in time. It's especially annoying when I'm in the right most lane, going ten over the speed limit and there are five empty lanes to the left but the tailgater wants to bully me out of the lane.
 
2013-06-12 07:30:03 PM  
Speaking of HOV lanes, ever since I got this-
images.thecarconnection.com
 And in even better news, there is bill to extend this to 2018.
 
2013-06-12 07:30:16 PM  
But he said the "spotsquad" concept of people personally profiting from telling on parking violators won't fly.

So it's ok for the cops to profit, ok for the town to profit, and ok for a private company to profit. But it's the mark of the devil himself if any private citizen ever profits. <arnold voice> Fark You Asshole. </arnold voice>
 
2013-06-12 07:30:25 PM  

Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.

So you lower yourself to their level? Call a tow truck and have them yank it away. Maybe you'll get a cherry on top if they happen to damage it when it's being hooked up. Then they're on the hook for towing costs and damage.

I don't think it's "lowering myself" to their level at all. In my experience, that's mostly a rhetorical instrument. I don't even agree with the premise.

The world would be better with a little more street justice.


So long as, you know, there's no direct confrontation between you and the perpetrator. *cough*
 
2013-06-12 07:30:32 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.

Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.


More specifically, it's a disproportionate response. The accepted penalty for Illegal parking is a parking ticket, not new paint job on part of your car. The reason more people park like shiat isn't because the penalty isn't bad enough. It's because it's rarely enforced, so they stand a good chance of not being penalized at all.
 
2013-06-12 07:30:41 PM  

thisisarepeat: But people that call cops with any message other than "HELP!", truly deserve physical violence, and/or vicious vandalism.


So, I had a guy parking and blocking my garage. So I called the local parking authority. "Oh, no, actually, your address is outside of our jurisdiction, you have to call the police." So I hit the interwebs, find the phone number for the local precinct, and call them directly. "Oh, you have to call 911 for that."

Yes, really. I apologized to the 911 operator, and said, "The police told me to call you." They didn't mind, but got me off the phone quick.
 
2013-06-12 07:32:56 PM  
It would be cheaper and more effective then paying people to work full time to do it.
 
2013-06-12 07:33:18 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Mitch Taylor's Bro: Gulper Eel: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.

I have considered buying a GoPro and mounting it somewhere on my car so I could document some of the BS I see on my relatively short commute. Maybe one on the back, too, for tailgaters. I could produce some kind of "Tosh.0" but focused solely on bad drivers.

I've wanted to get one of those small scrolling marquees you see at Office Depot for my back window. Put some pre-programmed lines in there like "Get off my ass dickhead" or "Left lane for passing only moron!" (and of course "thank you" when they're nice). That way I could voice my full opinion, more than just a finger can convey.


I had that idea, too! We should totally go into business! Can you do app development? Just program an Arduino with a few buttons that activate specific scrolling messages. we could sell them on thinkgeek.com :)
 
2013-06-12 07:33:53 PM  

Gulper Eel: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.


That exists at least in Ohio, and probably elsewhere. 1-800-GRAB-DUI. When I worked second shift I'd call it on my way home at least once a week on average.
 
2013-06-12 07:37:12 PM  

Uncle_Sam's_Titties: See, the chalk-made special parking spot is the way to go. That way if d-bag owner comes out and wants to fight, you'll get what you want.

People that take pictures to snitch are no better than the assholes that park shiatty. Equally passive-agressive, equally pussies.


Wrong. I want people who park like assholes to get parking tickets. I couldn't care less if said assholes know what I think of them.
 
2013-06-12 07:37:13 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: doglover: scottydoesntknow: So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

Everybody follows it, even if they say they don't. It's a hardwired thing.

No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again. If you're an entitled douchebag, yes, you get mad at the person who reported you because you obviously operate under the misguided assumption that "everything is legal if you don't get caught."


Why not? It works for incumbents.
 
2013-06-12 07:40:11 PM  

doglover: scottydoesntknow: So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

Everybody follows it, even if they say they don't. It's a hardwired thing.


Uh, no. No, they don't. But I could see how some might think so. Assholes, for example.
 
2013-06-12 07:41:50 PM  
www.theblindcard.com

Don't even THINK of using your lame-ass, fake handicap sticker around here.
 
2013-06-12 07:42:19 PM  

Skywolf the Scribbler: First-world people problem, car people problem, or city people probles?


Def not a first-world problem, as any Russian dashcam compilation will show you.
 
2013-06-12 07:42:57 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: Mitch Taylor's Bro: doglover: scottydoesntknow: So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

Everybody follows it, even if they say they don't. It's a hardwired thing.

No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again. If you're an entitled douchebag, yes, you get mad at the person who reported you because you obviously operate under the misguided assumption that "everything is legal if you don't get caught."

Why not? It works for incumbents.


I'd laugh, but the sad truth is if the public office is high enough, chances are it works for challengers, too. Citation: every Presidential campaign since ever.
 
2013-06-12 07:43:26 PM  

Uncle_Sam's_Titties: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.

So you lower yourself to their level? Call a tow truck and have them yank it away. Maybe you'll get a cherry on top if they happen to damage it when it's being hooked up. Then they're on the hook for towing costs and damage.

I don't think it's "lowering myself" to their level at all. In my experience, that's mostly a rhetorical instrument. I don't even agree with the premise.

The world would be better with a little more street justice.

So long as, you know, there's no direct confrontation between you and the perpetrator. *cough*


Oh, definitely not. I'm chickenshiat all the way. I just refuse to feel badly about it in this instance -- a guy gets what he deserves at no cost to myself. It seems to me the only people who might have a problem with it are those who drive and/or park rudely.
 
2013-06-12 07:43:41 PM  
GreenAdder: clintster: [www.killsometime.com image 450x600]
 I'm okay with this.

Yes. Chalk is often a good thing to keep at the ready, apparently.
[i.imgur.com image 600x654]
[i.imgur.com image 659x428]


True story: I was in the garage at a Boscov's years ago, saw a car parked like that, and left a note that said "NICE PARK JOB, ASSHOLE" on the windshield.

A few years later, I'm on a date, we see somebody parked like that, and she starts telling me a story about how a few years back, she had parked lazily at Boscov's and somebody left a note on her windshield that said "NICE PARK JOB, ASSHOLE".
 
2013-06-12 07:46:38 PM  

Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?


Yeah, you sure showed that guy's insurance company.
 
2013-06-12 07:48:28 PM  
This will not end well, sooner or later some hot head is going to catch someone using this app to report them and its going to get ugly fast.

Also i can see false reports happening.
 
2013-06-12 07:48:50 PM  
I am glad that I live in an area that doesn't have a huge parking issue.  I don't even know if there are parking meters in my city.  What I do dislike is, the apartment I live in, in the morning there is an asshat who parks in the parking lot, not in a space, but in the drive section, often blocking other cars.  Sometimes this person sits in his car and just honks his horn,or parks behind parked cars, leaves his door open and car running.  Fark anyone he's blocking.  I told him block me one more time and I'll put your car in drive and let you explain to your insurance company what happened.
 
2013-06-12 07:52:26 PM  
Sometimes you just have to park badly and abandon your vehicle.

simpsonswiki.net

You know...like when you've had a lot of crab juice?
 
2013-06-12 07:52:39 PM  

Great Janitor: I am glad that I live in an area that doesn't have a huge parking issue.  I don't even know if there are parking meters in my city.  What I do dislike is, the apartment I live in, in the morning there is an asshat who parks in the parking lot, not in a space, but in the drive section, often blocking other cars.  Sometimes this person sits in his car and just honks his horn,or parks behind parked cars, leaves his door open and car running.  Fark anyone he's blocking.  I told him block me one more time and I'll put your car in drive and let you explain to your insurance company what happened.


He's picking up a carpooler.  I had one of those in my neighborhood once - townhouse cul-de-sac.  He'd lay on the horn at 6 am 10 times, when the guy he's honking at couldn't be any farther than 35 feet away.  I stopped being annoyed when I got new triple-pane windows installed.
 
2013-06-12 07:55:25 PM  

thisisarepeat: people that double park suck, I do not like them.  But people that call cops with any message other than "HELP!", truly deserve physical violence, and/or vicious vandalism.


Why? Their entire reason for existence is to enforce the law.
 
2013-06-12 07:55:30 PM  

GreenAdder: Mitch Taylor's Bro: No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again.

But if someone only takes up one parking space, someone might dent the door on his 1998 Accord. Even worse, that person might have to walk an extra five feet to get into the store.


I've never understood people who take two spaces.  If I had a car that I didn't want vandalized, that is the last thing I would do.
 
2013-06-12 07:59:19 PM  
I'd like to see a law for people who double park in handicap spots without a handicap license. The law would allow a tow truck driver to push the car over with a snowplow
 
2013-06-12 08:01:52 PM  

FrancoFile: Great Janitor: I am glad that I live in an area that doesn't have a huge parking issue.  I don't even know if there are parking meters in my city.  What I do dislike is, the apartment I live in, in the morning there is an asshat who parks in the parking lot, not in a space, but in the drive section, often blocking other cars.  Sometimes this person sits in his car and just honks his horn,or parks behind parked cars, leaves his door open and car running.  Fark anyone he's blocking.  I told him block me one more time and I'll put your car in drive and let you explain to your insurance company what happened.

He's picking up a carpooler.  I had one of those in my neighborhood once - townhouse cul-de-sac.  He'd lay on the horn at 6 am 10 times, when the guy he's honking at couldn't be any farther than 35 feet away.  I stopped being annoyed when I got new triple-pane windows installed.


It's not the honking, it's going to work and being blocked in by his empty car, door open, engine running with him no where in sight that bothers me.  I know felons who would like an easy to steal car.
 
2013-06-12 08:03:02 PM  

vbob: [www.theblindcard.com image 400x400]

Don't even THINK of using your lame-ass, fake handicap sticker around here.


www.boiseweekly.com

This is how you know it's legit.
 
2013-06-12 08:04:45 PM  
i40.tinypic.comSpotsquad app banned after police find that people taking pictures of their vehicles violated their privacy
 
2013-06-12 08:04:53 PM  

blahpers: thisisarepeat: people that double park suck, I do not like them.  But people that call cops with any message other than "HELP!", truly deserve physical violence, and/or vicious vandalism.

Why? Their entire reason for existence is to enforce the law.


ts1.mm.bing.net
 
2013-06-12 08:05:05 PM  

Gulper Eel: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.


I have the California Highway Patrol on speedial #7.
In the past four years (when I started doing this) I have:

1. called in a 16 wheeler with a rear wheel FALLING OFF
2. several drunks (or sleepy drivers). Probably saved a few from accidents as I would also honk at them and flash lights at them if I think they are falling asleep. I know I'd want the same done for me.
3. a kid hit and run by a car
4. a really nasty accident where a sedan *almost* cut in front of a big-rig and caught the right fender of the big rig right where the driver is. called it in, didn't bother to look in the cab as I knew what I'd find there
5. myself after i got hit and run on an on-ramp.
 
2013-06-12 08:06:31 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: I have considered buying a GoPro and mounting it somewhere on my car so I could document some of the BS I see on my relatively short commute. Maybe one on the back, too, for tailgaters. I could produce some kind of "Tosh.0" but focused solely on bad drivers.


Just for you...as low as 20 bucks: dash cameras.
 
2013-06-12 08:07:18 PM  
This one amuses me -- gets the point across without needless damage.

www.lolwow.com
 
2013-06-12 08:08:52 PM  

scottydoesntknow: I've wanted to get one of those small scrolling marquees you see at Office Depot for my back window. Put some pre-programmed lines in there like "Get off my ass dickhead" or "Left lane for passing only moron!" (and of course "thank you" when they're nice). That way I could voice my full opinion, more than just a finger can convey.


Those were offered 20 years ago, for about $100.  Didn't sell well.
 
2013-06-12 08:09:41 PM  

sendtodave: blahpers: thisisarepeat: people that double park suck, I do not like them.  But people that call cops with any message other than "HELP!", truly deserve physical violence, and/or vicious vandalism.

Why? Their entire reason for existence is to enforce the law.

[ts1.mm.bing.net image 280x176]


Oh, right, I forgot. Carry on, doglover.
 
2013-06-12 08:11:00 PM  
What's wrong with peeing on the car like a normal person?
 
2013-06-12 08:12:08 PM  

Fonaibung: It seems to me the only people who might have a problem with it are those who drive and/or park rudely.


You forgot 'people who dislike chickenshiat little pissants who have deluded themselves into thinking that anonymous property damage = justice'. Those people would also have a problem with it.

/I'd have a problem with it if I thought for a second you actually had the balls to do it, instead of just claiming to do so on Fark.
 
2013-06-12 08:15:10 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: I have considered buying a GoPro and mounting it somewhere on my car so I could document some of the BS I see on my relatively short commute. Maybe one on the back, too, for tailgaters. I could produce some kind of "Tosh.0" but focused solely on bad drivers.


I don't go anywhere on my motorcycle without my gopro running. I've considered putting together some clips of people trying to kill me, but I'm just not that ambitious. I save any video where stupid shiat happened, but I've yet to actually do anything else with it.
 
2013-06-12 08:18:44 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.

Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.

More specifically, it's a disproportionate response. The accepted penalty for Illegal parking is a parking ticket, not new paint job on part of your car. The reason more people park like shiat isn't because the penalty isn't bad enough. It's because it's rarely enforced, so they stand a good chance of not being penalized at all.


Actually, the fine for parking in a disabled space is often more than the cost of a paint job.   Cities really jack that fine up because everybody agrees such assholes deserve it.

That said, depriving someone of due process by keying his car is worse than depriving him of a parking privilege.
 
2013-06-12 08:20:44 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: MisterTweak: jehovahs witness protection: ManateeGag: around here, I'd make a fortune ratting out people using handicapped parking spaces without proper tags.

I would be happy to get some of the fine. $500 bucks here.
Beats blocking them in while I unload my wheelchair and making them wait until I'm done shopping.

You made me remember something from like 30-ish years ago - I worked in a retail store, and there was this one twit who loved to park his car sideways across two handicap spots while he went shopping. Young, healthy guy who made a point of showing off his muscles. Totally ignored the signs warning of a large fine (I think it was like $250 + community service or something).

One day a guy pulled in behind him with a special van for a person in a wheelchair, obviously someone with complex issues - took them like 15 minutes to get the chair out, help the person into it, do various.. stuff... but in any case, aforementioned d-bag started panicking after about 5 minutes because a parking scooter was visible in the distance, slooooooowly working it's way closer. He was pleading with the people in the van to pleeeaase allow him to move, but with a lot of bemused people around including some that obviously knew him, he was doing it politery and totally ineffectively.

Anyhow, eventually the parking lady arrived, and spent no less than 10 minutes lecturing the d-bag, while a cop arrived who obviously determined that there was some other issue (I'm guessing outstanding parking tickets), meaning d-bag's car was getting towed. Sadly this was before cellphone cams (probably too early for even the big camcorders) or the sight of Mr. Roid Rage in tears as his sweet ride was dragged over the huge speed bumps would have been epic youtube stuff.

Polaroids or it didn't happen.


dl.dropboxusercontent.com
 
2013-06-12 08:21:14 PM  
It's a trap!

If you take pictures, you're a terrorist. Everyone knows that.
 
2013-06-12 08:22:38 PM  

Great Janitor: FrancoFile: Great Janitor: I am glad that I live in an area that doesn't have a huge parking issue.  I don't even know if there are parking meters in my city.  What I do dislike is, the apartment I live in, in the morning there is an asshat who parks in the parking lot, not in a space, but in the drive section, often blocking other cars.  Sometimes this person sits in his car and just honks his horn,or parks behind parked cars, leaves his door open and car running.  Fark anyone he's blocking.  I told him block me one more time and I'll put your car in drive and let you explain to your insurance company what happened.

He's picking up a carpooler.  I had one of those in my neighborhood once - townhouse cul-de-sac.  He'd lay on the horn at 6 am 10 times, when the guy he's honking at couldn't be any farther than 35 feet away.  I stopped being annoyed when I got new triple-pane windows installed.

It's not the honking, it's going to work and being blocked in by his empty car, door open, engine running with him no where in sight that bothers me.  I know felons who would like an easy to steal car.


Take the key and throw it in the bushes.
 
2013-06-12 08:23:04 PM  

Noticeably F.A.T.: Fonaibung: It seems to me the only people who might have a problem with it are those who drive and/or park rudely.

You forgot 'people who dislike chickenshiat little pissants who have deluded themselves into thinking that anonymous property damage = justice'. Those people would also have a problem with it.

/I'd have a problem with it if I thought for a second you actually had the balls to do it, instead of just claiming to do so on Fark.


I'd hate to let someone borrow my car only for it to be brought back with scratched or paint damage because some passive aggressive decided to teach someone a lesson by committing the crime of vandalism.
 
2013-06-12 08:26:13 PM  

Fonaibung: Uncle_Sam's_Titties: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.

So you lower yourself to their level? Call a tow truck and have them yank it away. Maybe you'll get a cherry on top if they happen to damage it when it's being hooked up. Then they're on the hook for towing costs and damage.

I don't think it's "lowering myself" to their level at all. In my experience, that's mostly a rhetorical instrument. I don't even agree with the premise.

The world would be better with a little more street justice.

So long as, you know, there's no direct confrontation between you and the perpetrator. *cough*

Oh, definitely not. I'm chickenshiat all the way. I just refuse to feel badly about it in this instance -- a guy gets what he deserves at no cost to myself. It seems to me the only people who might have a problem with it are those who drive and/or park rudely.


Well, this is actually a disproportionate response. You are willing to damage someone's vehicle because of your perception of their infraction. Read, if you will:

We'll deal with the physical items first: Your keying of their car causes a disproportional amount of damage to their vehicle/pocketbook versus what the ticket would cause. This is vigilantism. If you want the fines increased, petition your local council or whatever. Don't be a dick.

The emotional/mental items: You, in the act of surreptitiously mangling the perpetrator's vehicle, get an adrenaline rush that you most certainly enjoy. This is not only pathetic, it's addictive. Don't be a dick. And think about it: you will get a way bigger adrenaline rush if you actually confront the perpetrator face to face. If you get your ass kicked a few times, so be it. It's what you deserve, you sneaky POS. Eventually you'll be able to hold your own, and at that point you'll see the merit in withholding indirect feedback(damage of property) in favor of direct feedback(talk/conflict).

for the record: i park like a boss every single time. even during winter parking rules i park at the back of the lot and walk. my car isn't even nice. i despise people that drive around parking lots looking for a close spot.
 
2013-06-12 08:28:23 PM  
i just realized i said disproportionate a stupid amount of times

what can i say, i'm drunk on wild turkey
 
2013-06-12 08:31:30 PM  
parked next to one of these assholes at lunch today. fortunately I was on the motorcycle and could fit in the space this old coont left me.

If you can't be bothered to park between the lines, then you've indicated you have no intention of abiding by the social contract and consequently deserve whatever retribution is hurled in your direction... tickets, towing, scratched paint, shattered glass, etc.
 
2013-06-12 08:33:05 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: doglover: scottydoesntknow: So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

Everybody follows it, even if they say they don't. It's a hardwired thing.

No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again. If you're an entitled douchebag, yes, you get mad at the person who reported you because you obviously operate under the misguided assumption that "everything is legal if you don't get caught."


Grown ups dont tattle tale
 
2013-06-12 08:39:30 PM  

Fonaibung: Uncle_Sam's_Titties: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.

So you lower yourself to their level? Call a tow truck and have them yank it away. Maybe you'll get a cherry on top if they happen to damage it when it's being hooked up. Then they're on the hook for towing costs and damage.

I don't think it's "lowering myself" to their level at all. In my experience, that's mostly a rhetorical instrument. I don't even agree with the premise.

The world would be better with a little more street justice.

So long as, you know, there's no direct confrontation between you and the perpetrator. *cough*

Oh, definitely not. I'm chickenshiat all the way. I just refuse to feel badly about it in this instance -- a guy gets what he deserves at no cost to myself. It seems to me the only people who might have a problem with it are those who drive and/or park rudely.


You're wrong. I'd happily use the app to report douchy parkers. I'd also happily stand by and watch them kick the living shiat out of you if they caught you keying their car.
 
2013-06-12 08:39:58 PM  
In San Francisco, you are pretty much given a free park anywhere pass if you have a handicap plate.  You can even park in a red zone.  A few years ago it was discovered that the wife of the parking commissioner had a handicap placard despite being perfectly healthy.  Guess which office supplies those parking placards in San Francisco.
 
2013-06-12 08:40:17 PM  
Why you don't park in front of fire hydrants:
www.escalonfire.com
www.bannedinhollywood.com
cl.jroo.mewww.firenuggets.comwordlesstech.com
/I'd imagine firefighters must get some satisfaction when they get to do this
 
2013-06-12 08:41:04 PM  
 
2013-06-12 08:41:15 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: Great Janitor: FrancoFile: Great Janitor: I am glad that I live in an area that doesn't have a huge parking issue.  I don't even know if there are parking meters in my city.  What I do dislike is, the apartment I live in, in the morning there is an asshat who parks in the parking lot, not in a space, but in the drive section, often blocking other cars.  Sometimes this person sits in his car and just honks his horn,or parks behind parked cars, leaves his door open and car running.  Fark anyone he's blocking.  I told him block me one more time and I'll put your car in drive and let you explain to your insurance company what happened.

He's picking up a carpooler.  I had one of those in my neighborhood once - townhouse cul-de-sac.  He'd lay on the horn at 6 am 10 times, when the guy he's honking at couldn't be any farther than 35 feet away.  I stopped being annoyed when I got new triple-pane windows installed.

It's not the honking, it's going to work and being blocked in by his empty car, door open, engine running with him no where in sight that bothers me.  I know felons who would like an easy to steal car.

Take the key and throw it in the bushes.


That wouldn't unblock my car, but, I like it.  Also it occurs to me, if his keys are in the ignition, and the car has power locks, it might be possible to press the lock button and close the door.  I say might because my car, if you press the lock button with the key in the ignition and all the doors will instantly unlock.
 
2013-06-12 08:43:14 PM  
Snitches get stitches and end up in ditches.
 
2013-06-12 08:46:25 PM  

Noticeably F.A.T.: Mitch Taylor's Bro: I have considered buying a GoPro and mounting it somewhere on my car so I could document some of the BS I see on my relatively short commute. Maybe one on the back, too, for tailgaters. I could produce some kind of "Tosh.0" but focused solely on bad drivers.

I don't go anywhere on my motorcycle without my gopro running. I've considered putting together some clips of people trying to kill me, but I'm just not that ambitious. I save any video where stupid shiat happened, but I've yet to actually do anything else with it.


When I rode, I was too concerned with avoiding and evading assholes to even think about recording the assholery. You should post it to YT like the stunnahs.
 
2013-06-12 08:47:04 PM  

Fano: Noticeably F.A.T.: Fonaibung: It seems to me the only people who might have a problem with it are those who drive and/or park rudely.

You forgot 'people who dislike chickenshiat little pissants who have deluded themselves into thinking that anonymous property damage = justice'. Those people would also have a problem with it.

/I'd have a problem with it if I thought for a second you actually had the balls to do it, instead of just claiming to do so on Fark.

I'd hate to let someone borrow my car only for it to be brought back with scratched or paint damage because some passive aggressive decided to teach someone a lesson by committing the crime of vandalism.


Hell, you can't even say it teaches them a lesson. There's not a person in the world who, on finding their car keyed, says to themselves "Wow, I park like a douche. I really learned my lesson, and won't do that again." No, they say to themselves "Wow, I'd really like to kick the ass of whatever punk POS did this to my car."

You also really can't call it justice. This little chickenshiat isn't himself being harmed by the infraction, so he's not getting justice for himself. I'm sure he thinks he's getting justice for society, but the problem with that theory is that society has decided to put that responsibility into the hands of an appointed justice system, not random douche on the street. To get justice by society's standards you'd turn the criminal over to that justice system. Appointing yourself judge, jury and executioner on others' behalf isn't justice at all.

No, what we have here is someone who wants to justify in their own mind their own criminal tendencies. They're too much of a puss to actually confront anyone, and too much of a douche to commit a crime that doesn't harm anyone else, so they have to commit a crime against someone who they feel 'has it coming'.

/Actually, what we have here is a person who would really like to do all that, but can't quite get themselves past the 'bragging about doing it on the internet' stage.
 
2013-06-12 08:47:47 PM  

MisterTweak: [dl.dropboxusercontent.com image 342x451]


Thanks for the literal LOL! :-)
 
2013-06-12 08:49:20 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: When I rode, I was too concerned with avoiding and evading assholes to even think about recording the assholery. You should post it to YT like the stunnahs.


I don't really think too much about it. I just mount the camera and hit record before I take off. I put as much thought into it as I do putting on a helmet, which is nearly none (it's just a habit now). The only time I really think about it is after the fact, when I say to myself "remember to save that clip".
 
2013-06-12 08:51:29 PM  

teenage mutant ninja rapist: Mitch Taylor's Bro: doglover: scottydoesntknow: So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

Everybody follows it, even if they say they don't. It's a hardwired thing.

No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again. If you're an entitled douchebag, yes, you get mad at the person who reported you because you obviously operate under the misguided assumption that "everything is legal if you don't get caught."

Grown ups dont tattle tale


No, but we report people breaking the law. But I'll keep that in mind if I ever see anyone doing anything to your personal property, like keying your car because you parked like a douche.
 
2013-06-12 08:55:33 PM  

Noticeably F.A.T.: Mitch Taylor's Bro: When I rode, I was too concerned with avoiding and evading assholes to even think about recording the assholery. You should post it to YT like the stunnahs.

I don't really think too much about it. I just mount the camera and hit record before I take off. I put as much thought into it as I do putting on a helmet, which is nearly none (it's just a habit now). The only time I really think about it is after the fact, when I say to myself "remember to save that clip".


Good point. Go ahead and post 'em to youtube!
 
2013-06-12 08:58:40 PM  

Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.

Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.

Beg to differ: an able-bodied person parking in a handicapped spot is as low as you can possibly get.

I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.


I'm with you. No "banal evils" infuriate me more than those committed by self-entitled assholes.

If you consciously choose to do something so blatantly and publicly callous as thumbing your nose at farking disabled people for the sole purpose of defying anyone to call you on it, you deserve just exactly what you get -- up to and including a therapeutic ass beating should you choose to press the issue.
 
2013-06-12 09:12:02 PM  

kc278: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.

Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.

Beg to differ: an able-bodied person parking in a handicapped spot is as low as you can possibly get.

I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.

I'm with you. No "banal evils" infuriate me more than those committed by self-entitled assholes.

If you consciously choose to do something so blatantly and publicly callous as thumbing your nose at farking disabled people for the sole purpose of defying anyone to call you on it, you deserve just exactly what you get -- up to and including a therapeutic ass beating should you choose to press the issue.


Not meaning to defend people who park in handicap spaces, but I wish the laws about space allocation were more reasonable.  Currently, a certain percentage of spaces must be handicapped.  So at places like my work, we have a dozen spaces taken up when half that would be more than enough.  I don't think I've ever seen more than one space used at any one time.  I think my local BART station has about 30 spaces set aside.  I don't think there's that many people with handicapped plates in the entire city.
 
2013-06-12 09:20:22 PM  
Instead of reporting them and getting a percentage of the fine, the snitch should be allowed to shot them and take their car and wallet.  And if it's a guy with  a hot girl friend or wife they should get two free boinks out of her.
 
2013-06-12 09:22:01 PM  

Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.


I report 3 - 5 people every single week for cheating in the HOV lane. I wish my state had an app.
 
2013-06-12 09:29:54 PM  
1. Follow a UPS truck all day.
2. Parkin' narcin'
3. Profit, profit, and profit.
 
2013-06-12 09:29:55 PM  

OregonVet: WINNIPEG

*stops reading*


Sweet drunk chick from Winnipeg...

http://www.hulu.com/watch/178028
 
2013-06-12 09:42:43 PM  
This could effectively allow homeless people to make an income and stop begging.  It would be great.

/screw you illegal parkers
 
2013-06-12 09:43:56 PM  
I have a feeling some people are going to be following cops all day and snapping pics of their 'parking'.
 
2013-06-12 09:56:10 PM  

OgreMagi: kc278: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.

Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.

Beg to differ: an able-bodied person parking in a handicapped spot is as low as you can possibly get.

I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.

I'm with you. No "banal evils" infuriate me more than those committed by self-entitled assholes.

If you consciously choose to do something so blatantly and publicly callous as thumbing your nose at farking disabled people for the sole purpose of defying anyone to call you on it, you deserve just exactly what you get -- up to and including a therapeutic ass beating should you choose to press the issue.

Not meaning to defend people who park in handicap spaces, but I wish the laws about space allocation were more reasonable.  Currently, a certain percentage of spaces must be handicapped.  So at places like my work, we have a dozen spaces taken up when half that would be more than enough.  I don't think I've ever seen more than one space used at any one time.  I think my local BART station has about 30 spaces set aside.  I don't think there's that many people with handicapped plates in the entire city.


Living in So Cal, I can't reasonably disagree with your premise. But I'd still rather there be "too many" handicapped spots than not enough at a given place/time. Bearing in mind that you and I fortunately have the option of walking a few extra feet if need be.

/This from someone who believes, based on no little direct personal experience, that most of those farkers are sandbagging:  http://losangeles.cbslocal.com/2013/01/31/cbs2-investigation-reveals- r ampant-fraud-in-use-of-disabled-parking-placards/

//If you're that much of a douchebag, you're beyond my ire.
 
2013-06-12 10:06:09 PM  

scottydoesntknow: This is no different than CrimeStoppers or 222-TIPS. Those people get a reward for any information leading to arrests of individuals who broke the law.

Don't want to get a fine for illegally parking? Don't illegally park. I got some douchebag's car in my apartment complex towed because he insisted on double-parking his ugly truck over two handicapped spots (no placard of course). First I put a sign on his window saying "Stupidity is not a handicap. Park here again and I'll make sure it's towed." He challenged it so I called the office and watched as a tow truck came and picked it up.


Exactly.  While there are example of unreasonable parking laws and insane enforcement of reasonable laws in general parking laws exist to apportion out a limited resource fairly.

apoptotic: It occurs to me that someone with photoshop skills could use this to keep the parking authority busy running around the city like chickens with their heads cut off. Not that I'm suggesting such a thing, of course. My brain is just in its "how could this possibly backfire in spectacular fashion" default mode.


I think that's why they're making it an app rather than just allow photo submissions.

RogermcAllen: Much like in bottle return states, I expect a cottage industry to pop up where homeless people scour the city for illegally parked cars.


It wouldn't last long as people would start parking correctly when the parking enforcement suddenly was everywhere.

Gulper Eel: Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.


I encounter few drunks but I certainly understand how you feel.

I have long advocated a somewhat different version of this--an anti-tamper video camera that you leave running in your car when you're driving.  When you see an offense you take out the chip and send it to the cops along with a small fee to discourage misuse of the system.  If the chip actually shows an offense and a plate you get the fee back, if the video convicts the guy you get a % of whatever the court gets.
 
2013-06-12 10:14:30 PM  

kc278: OgreMagi: kc278: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.

Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.

Beg to differ: an able-bodied person parking in a handicapped spot is as low as you can possibly get.

I don't feel at all bad for keying someone's car if they deserve it. If I were causing wanton property damage, then yes.

I'm with you. No "banal evils" infuriate me more than those committed by self-entitled assholes.

If you consciously choose to do something so blatantly and publicly callous as thumbing your nose at farking disabled people for the sole purpose of defying anyone to call you on it, you deserve just exactly what you get -- up to and including a therapeutic ass beating should you choose to press the issue.

Not meaning to defend people who park in handicap spaces, but I wish the laws about space allocation were more reasonable.  Currently, a certain percentage of spaces must be handicapped.  So at places like my work, we have a dozen spaces taken up when half that would be more than enough.  I don't think I've ever seen more than one space used at any one time.  I think my local BART station has about 30 spaces set aside.  I don't think there's that many people with handicapped plates in the entire city.

Living in So Cal, I can't reasonably disagree with your premise. But I'd still rather there be "too many" handicapped spots than not enough at a given place/time. Bearing in mind that you and I fortunately have the option of walking a few extra feet if need be.

/This from someone who believes, based on no little direct personal experience, that most of those farkers are sandbagging:  http ...


I don't mind too many handicapped spaces when there is plenty of parking available.  But too many times I've found myself circling around the BART parking lot trying to find a space with two entire rows of handicapped spaces sitting unused.  At least they're dealing with that particular station and are currently building a multilevel parking garage (which has temporarily made the parking issue even worse).
 
2013-06-12 10:21:44 PM  

Too_many_Brians: This could effectively allow homeless people to make an income and stop begging.  It would be great.

/screw you illegal parkers


Since it's an app, I foresee a problem with the homeless making money this way.
 
2013-06-12 10:38:57 PM  

Great Janitor: Too_many_Brians: This could effectively allow homeless people to make an income and stop begging.  It would be great.

/screw you illegal parkers

Since it's an app, I foresee a problem with the homeless making money this way.


Why?  They all have Obamaphones

/ring-ring-ring-ring
 
2013-06-12 10:44:08 PM  
1) Carry one of those tools for removing the stem valve from the valve stem.

2) Use it on illegally parked cars.

3) Leave stem valve taped to windshield so offender knows their tire hasn't been slashed or otherwise damaged, to avoid committing "vandalism".

4) Profit!
 
2013-06-12 10:45:37 PM  
5) Use on idiots' cars also.
 
2013-06-12 10:48:29 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: scottydoesntknow: Fonaibung: Oh yeah, and am I the only one that has keyed cars for parking like assholes, or for cutting me off on the freeway?

Sorry to be the one to inform you of this, but keying a car makes you a bigger asshole than anyone else.

Why? It's not like I'm keying someone that doesn't deserve it. It's targeted justice.

Property damage. Keying a car is about as low as you can possibly get.


No Parking across multiple spaces is as low as you can get.... I've seen someone manage to get his car over 6 spaces.
 
2013-06-12 10:54:43 PM  

pueblonative: FatherChaos: The followup to this story will be in a month or so with "45 people shot to death this month for snitching on illegal parkers, program revoked in the interest of public safety."

Hate to break it to you, but government types typically frown on people who even so much as spit in the direction of informants.  They use terms like "aggravating factors" and other things that tend to make stretches in the pen longer.


Unless you are informing the public of something the government is doing..... Then you get labeled a traitor
 
2013-06-12 10:56:11 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: GreenAdder: Mitch Taylor's Bro: No, it's a douchebag thing. If you do something wrong and someone "snitches," the right thing to do is accept your punishment like an adult and don't do it again.

But if someone only takes up one parking space, someone might dent the door on his 1998 Accord. Even worse, that person might have to walk an extra five feet to get into the store.

Judging from this website, this might actually be a worse problem than I first suspected.

http://iparklikeanass.com/



Hey! I park like that! Albeit several rows away from everyone else, so it doesn't inconvenience anyone.

Regarding the app, I'd happily use it to snitch on all the assholes who park within 30' of an intersection on our narrow streets here. Real fun seeing/getting around them.
 
2013-06-12 10:56:41 PM  
I was waiting at a bus stop when some biatch parked her Beamer in the "no parking, bus stop" space and strutted across the street to a bistro.   I let the air out of two tires so the tow truck called by the bus driver wouldn't waste a trip.

Watched a guy park his Porsche in a no-parking zone right in front of me.  As he exited his car, he heard me saying into my phone, "Hello, Parking Control? I got a live one for  ya."  He cursed me, ranting that it was no big deal and he always parked there. He went into his building, but came back ten minutes later.  Cursed me again as he moved the car.   I didn't have Parking Control's number, of course.

Then there was the Caddy owner who thought it was cool to park at the corner, totally blocking the crosswalk and sidewalk.  I called to him as he returned with his ice cream cone, "Better have that engine checked, asshole!"  He walked all the way around his car looking high and low for damage; best of all, his ice cream fell out of the cone as he bent over. Hope the checkup cost him something substantial.
 
2013-06-12 10:59:45 PM  

HAMMERTOE: 1) Carry one of those tools for removing the stem valve from the valve stem.

2) Use it on illegally parked cars.

3) Leave stem valve taped to windshield so offender knows their tire hasn't been slashed or otherwise damaged, to avoid committing "vandalism".

4) Profit!


If you carry some BBs, you can unscrew the valve stem cap, drop a BB into it, then screw it back on until you hear a "ssssss"
 
2013-06-12 11:03:42 PM  

Johnson: If you carry some BBs, you can unscrew the valve stem cap, drop a BB into it, then screw it back on until you hear a "ssssss"


Newsletter, please. :-)
 
2013-06-12 11:04:56 PM  
In the 80s I drove a beat up Honda Civic.  The body was so banged up that only the rust held it together.  But that engine just ran and ran (Honda makes great engines).  It was given to me because I couldn't afford a car at the time.  One day near christmas I'm trying to park at the mall.  The place is full and some douche with a porsche chose to take two spaces.  But he left just barely enough room for me to squeeze that piece of shiat car in and block the driver's side.  When I came out of the mall the porsche owner was just standing there.  I laughed, got in my beater, and drove off.  I hope he came out from shopping right when I went in.

I wouldn't do that with my brand new Miata.  There's something to be said for driving a car that you don't care if it gets damaged.
 
2013-06-12 11:06:34 PM  

Johnson: HAMMERTOE: 1) Carry one of those tools for removing the stem valve from the valve stem.

2) Use it on illegally parked cars.

3) Leave stem valve taped to windshield so offender knows their tire hasn't been slashed or otherwise damaged, to avoid committing "vandalism".

4) Profit!

If you carry some BBs, you can unscrew the valve stem cap, drop a BB into it, then screw it back on until you hear a "ssssss"


Just loosen the valve stem to cause a very slow leak.  It's a punishment that could last for months before they figure it out.
 
2013-06-12 11:15:15 PM  

badLogic: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

That, and some sort of law allowing me to run down people who leave their shopping carts in the middle of parking lots. Those two things are all I ask.

Agreed, plus people that use handicap spots who don't have the wheelie sticker.   Could we also start ticketing the douchbags that take up four parking spots at once in a parking lot?


Parking lots are private properties, the lines suggesting parking spaces and even stop signs within parking lots, are just that, suggestions. Not legally enforceable.

/ Parks in four spaces when he can
// Would never park in a handicapped space
 
2013-06-12 11:19:09 PM  

OgreMagi: In the 80s I drove a beat up Honda Civic.  The body was so banged up that only the rust held it together.  But that engine just ran and ran (Honda makes great engines).  It was given to me because I couldn't afford a car at the time.  One day near christmas I'm trying to park at the mall.  The place is full and some douche with a porsche chose to take two spaces.  But he left just barely enough room for me to squeeze that piece of shiat car in and block the driver's side.  When I came out of the mall the porsche owner was just standing there.  I laughed, got in my beater, and drove off.  I hope he came out from shopping right when I went in.

I wouldn't do that with my brand new Miata.  There's something to be said for driving a car that you don't care if it gets damaged.




D1vwife has been bugging me for years to get a new truck, but I just can't get over the freedom that comes from driving a 22 year old tank that I don't give a damn if it gets scratched, bumped, or backed into.

( 91 Ford 1-ton. Dad backed into it with his skid-steer last weekend. Left a smudge on the bumper.)
 
2013-06-12 11:33:04 PM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: scottydoesntknow: Mitch Taylor's Bro: Gulper Eel: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.

I have considered buying a GoPro and mounting it somewhere on my car so I could document some of the BS I see on my relatively short commute. Maybe one on the back, too, for tailgaters. I could produce some kind of "Tosh.0" but focused solely on bad drivers.

I've wanted to get one of those small scrolling marquees you see at Office Depot for my back window. Put some pre-programmed lines in there like "Get off my ass dickhead" or "Left lane for passing only moron!" (and of course "thank you" when they're nice). That way I could voice my full opinion, more than just a finger can convey.

I had that idea, too! We should totally go into business! Can you do app development? Just program an Arduino with a few buttons that activate specific scrolling messages. we could sell them on thinkgeek.com :)


I've had the exact same idea, down to the Arduino to run it. Nice to know it's not just me that thinks of these things.

/not a lot of people seem to understand "keep right except to pass" in this state
//also hate driving in the right lane on I-90 in the middle of WA state at night with some d-bag going the same speed as me, but in the left lane and just a little behind me, so their lights are hitting my side mirror and practically blinding me
 
2013-06-12 11:33:11 PM  
Instagram my car and get a free concussion!
 
2013-06-12 11:36:50 PM  

Skyd1v: OgreMagi: In the 80s I drove a beat up Honda Civic.  The body was so banged up that only the rust held it together.  But that engine just ran and ran (Honda makes great engines).  It was given to me because I couldn't afford a car at the time.  One day near christmas I'm trying to park at the mall.  The place is full and some douche with a porsche chose to take two spaces.  But he left just barely enough room for me to squeeze that piece of shiat car in and block the driver's side.  When I came out of the mall the porsche owner was just standing there.  I laughed, got in my beater, and drove off.  I hope he came out from shopping right when I went in.

I wouldn't do that with my brand new Miata.  There's something to be said for driving a car that you don't care if it gets damaged.

D1vwife has been bugging me for years to get a new truck, but I just can't get over the freedom that comes from driving a 22 year old tank that I don't give a damn if it gets scratched, bumped, or backed into.

( 91 Ford 1-ton. Dad backed into it with his skid-steer last weekend. Left a smudge on the bumper.)


Obligatory Adam Sandler:  Piece of Shiat Car
 
2013-06-13 12:00:51 AM  

OgreMagi: Johnson: HAMMERTOE: 1) Carry one of those tools for removing the stem valve from the valve stem.

2) Use it on illegally parked cars.

3) Leave stem valve taped to windshield so offender knows their tire hasn't been slashed or otherwise damaged, to avoid committing "vandalism".

4) Profit!

If you carry some BBs, you can unscrew the valve stem cap, drop a BB into it, then screw it back on until you hear a "ssssss"

Just loosen the valve stem to cause a very slow leak.  It's a punishment that could last for months before they figure it out.


That can kill someone.
 
2013-06-13 12:09:15 AM  
I sort of like this idea. People parking in handicapped spaces and general parking douchebaggery should be dealt with.

But, I have an exception. I wouldn't want to snitch on a driver who forgot to feed the meter or is running afoul of a time restriction on parking. In these cases, let them take their chances with the meter maids. I suppose I'm thinking these people may have made 'mistakes' rather than purposeful douchebaggery and should have the benefit of the doubt until the little Parking Enforcement scooter comes around.

I frequently do business in one village that sets their parking meters for $0.25 per 2 hours. They really don't care about the revenue, but it encourages the freeing up of spaces to allow others to shop. Which was the original intent. If you can't put a quarter in, you probably deserve the ticket.
 
2013-06-13 12:09:22 AM  
S#!T, and I've been doing it for free all this time when I find a car parked in the bike lane.

The enzymes in saliva will eat through the toughest paint jobs. It almost breaks my heart when it's a really nice car the perpetrator has illegally parked, but not enough to keep me from leaving my mark.

I can only imagine how motor morons would react if I parked my bicycle in the automobile traffic lanes.

Yeah, I know, you'd just run over it wouldn't you mr/mrs tough guy.

Your accelerator pedal leg muscles must be pretty strong huh?
 
2013-06-13 12:10:12 AM  

doglover: OgreMagi: Johnson: HAMMERTOE: 1) Carry one of those tools for removing the stem valve from the valve stem.

2) Use it on illegally parked cars.

3) Leave stem valve taped to windshield so offender knows their tire hasn't been slashed or otherwise damaged, to avoid committing "vandalism".

4) Profit!

If you carry some BBs, you can unscrew the valve stem cap, drop a BB into it, then screw it back on until you hear a "ssssss"

Just loosen the valve stem to cause a very slow leak.  It's a punishment that could last for months before they figure it out.

That can kill someone.


A slow leak can kill?  Only if the driver is too stupid to notice his tire is getting low and tries to race on a mountain.
 
2013-06-13 12:17:23 AM  

doglover: OgreMagi: Johnson: HAMMERTOE: 1) Carry one of those tools for removing the stem valve from the valve stem.

2) Use it on illegally parked cars.

3) Leave stem valve taped to windshield so offender knows their tire hasn't been slashed or otherwise damaged, to avoid committing "vandalism".

4) Profit!

If you carry some BBs, you can unscrew the valve stem cap, drop a BB into it, then screw it back on until you hear a "ssssss"

Just loosen the valve stem to cause a very slow leak.  It's a punishment that could last for months before they figure it out.

That can kill someone.


Not if you only do it to the rear tires.
 
2013-06-13 12:18:30 AM  

OgreMagi: doglover: OgreMagi: Johnson: HAMMERTOE: 1) Carry one of those tools for removing the stem valve from the valve stem.

2) Use it on illegally parked cars.

3) Leave stem valve taped to windshield so offender knows their tire hasn't been slashed or otherwise damaged, to avoid committing "vandalism".

4) Profit!

If you carry some BBs, you can unscrew the valve stem cap, drop a BB into it, then screw it back on until you hear a "ssssss"

Just loosen the valve stem to cause a very slow leak.  It's a punishment that could last for months before they figure it out.

That can kill someone.

A slow leak can kill?  Only if the driver is too stupid to notice his tire is getting low and tries to race on a mountain.


Absurd as it is, I don't trust the legal system.

Peanuts have been the cause of 0.0000% of the deaths in any year you care to pick. But peanuts are banned all over because some people have allergies.

Would you wanna risk Johnny Law's boot up your ass for attempted murder just to slowly deflate a tire? Deflate it all in one go or better yet leave the tires alone. Justice is blind and the law is stupid. Give them no chance to eff you.
 
2013-06-13 12:21:30 AM  

Mitch Taylor's Bro: Good point. Go ahead and post 'em to youtube!


I will. Eventually. When I get around to it.

/Really.
 
2013-06-13 12:26:15 AM  

TwowheelinTim: S#!T, and I've been doing it for free all this time when I find a car parked in the bike lane.

The enzymes in saliva will eat through the toughest paint jobs. It almost breaks my heart when it's a really nice car the perpetrator has illegally parked, but not enough to keep me from leaving my mark.

I can only imagine how motor morons would react if I parked my bicycle in the automobile traffic lanes.

Yeah, I know, you'd just run over it wouldn't you mr/mrs tough guy.

Your accelerator pedal leg muscles must be pretty strong huh?


I drive a truck.  It isn't hard to pick up an 'abandoned' bicycle.  It also doesn't take long to cut a bike into scrap.

Cool your jets Francis, everyone gets crapped on.
 
2013-06-13 12:41:01 AM  

OgreMagi: In the 80s I drove a beat up Honda Civic.  The body was so banged up that only the rust held it together.  But that engine just ran and ran (Honda makes great engines).  It was given to me because I couldn't afford a car at the time.  One day near christmas I'm trying to park at the mall.  The place is full and some douche with a porsche chose to take two spaces.  But he left just barely enough room for me to squeeze that piece of shiat car in and block the driver's side.  When I came out of the mall the porsche owner was just standing there.  I laughed, got in my beater, and drove off.  I hope he came out from shopping right when I went in.

I wouldn't do that with my brand new Miata.  There's something to be said for driving a car that you don't care if it gets damaged.


Man, I love doing that. Lots of parking garages in the area with moderately narrow spaces and people who park about six inches over the spot on their driver's side. The resulting spot they leave next to them is pretty narrow and usually empty, but my '99 Corolla (not beat up, but still worth less than my paycheck) fits nicely, with about three inches to spare. (When I do this, I sometimes re-park just to make sure I'm exactly midway between the lines of my own spot, just to make absolutely sure no one can accuse me of snuggling too close on the other guy's side.)

I've never got to watch the other guy have to crawl in over the passenger side, but I have often come back to an empty spot on my right and know the other guy must've had to deal with the situation. Haven't been keyed yet, not that it'd be a big deal if I was.

I also printed off a whole stack of the "youparklikeanasshole.com" sheets, as posted earlier in the thread, and I have been known to actually leave them under people's windshield wipers, with the appropriate box checked. I'd like to think they worry for a moment when they see it before they get close enough to find it's not a ticket, just a snarky notice from no one of consequence.
 
2013-06-13 12:43:52 AM  

CyberDave: I've had the exact same idea, down to the Arduino to run it. Nice to know it's not just me that thinks of these things.


I dunno, I'd be worried if I were you.
 
2013-06-13 12:48:11 AM  

doglover: OgreMagi: Johnson: HAMMERTOE: 1) Carry one of those tools for removing the stem valve from the valve stem.

2) Use it on illegally parked cars.

3) Leave stem valve taped to windshield so offender knows their tire hasn't been slashed or otherwise damaged, to avoid committing "vandalism".

4) Profit!

If you carry some BBs, you can unscrew the valve stem cap, drop a BB into it, then screw it back on until you hear a "ssssss"

Just loosen the valve stem to cause a very slow leak.  It's a punishment that could last for months before they figure it out.

That can kill someone.


Yeah, sometimes, I feel like doing evil shiat to some of the inconsiderate jerkwads around my condo complex, like put a nail under one of their tires so they discover it after they back out. Then I think about how I'd feel if said jerkwad had a bad car accident because the nail suddenly deflated the tire at speed. And my stupid conscience prevents me from being evil. Stupid conscience!
 
2013-06-13 01:07:44 AM  

lack of warmth: TwowheelinTim: S#!T, and I've been doing it for free all this time when I find a car parked in the bike lane.

The enzymes in saliva will eat through the toughest paint jobs. It almost breaks my heart when it's a really nice car the perpetrator has illegally parked, but not enough to keep me from leaving my mark.

I can only imagine how motor morons would react if I parked my bicycle in the automobile traffic lanes.

Yeah, I know, you'd just run over it wouldn't you mr/mrs tough guy.

Your accelerator pedal leg muscles must be pretty strong huh?

I drive a truck.  It isn't hard to pick up an 'abandoned' bicycle.  It also doesn't take long to cut a bike into scrap.

Cool your jets Francis, everyone gets crapped on.


Yeah, but not everybody is driving a 8000 pound cage.

If you don't like where I ride my bicycle, maybe you should take the bus.
 
2013-06-13 01:09:51 AM  
How about calling it in if I see some moron having someone else blow into his inhibitor to get the car started, because he's had too much to drink?  Saw that one the other night.  I don't think that's just a ticket, as the driver was sufficiently buzzed and the key was most definitely in the ignition, with the intent to go driving... DUI #2 in the making.  That's not just a slap on the wrists around here.

Was on the bus when some douche decided to pull into a bus-only spot ... while the bus was loading passengers.  Bus driver honked, was flipped off, and the cop not less than ten feet away started writing a ticket before the douche even stepped out of the car.

Cops on the local campus wait for morons to roll on down the bus-only street, which is clearly marked with a "cars go  that->way" sign and turn-off, which is the main drop off point for kids going to class.  every 15 minutes or so, new moron cruises down the street.

/sans automobile for some years now
//it's downtown, don't really need one
 
2013-06-13 01:17:05 AM  

CyberDave: Mitch Taylor's Bro: scottydoesntknow: Mitch Taylor's Bro: Gulper Eel: Pocket Ninja: I'm ambivalent on this for parking, but if they invented something similar to turn in the rat bastards who violate HOV lanes, I'd be all over it.

Drunks. I would snitch on drunks in a hot minute. At the insanely early hours I drive to work, I could cover my entire car insurance payment with a year's worth of turning in the wasted-ass weaving-all-over-the-road shiatheels who are out on the road at the same time I am.

I have considered buying a GoPro and mounting it somewhere on my car so I could document some of the BS I see on my relatively short commute. Maybe one on the back, too, for tailgaters. I could produce some kind of "Tosh.0" but focused solely on bad drivers.

I've wanted to get one of those small scrolling marquees you see at Office Depot for my back window. Put some pre-programmed lines in there like "Get off my ass dickhead" or "Left lane for passing only moron!" (and of course "thank you" when they're nice). That way I could voice my full opinion, more than just a finger can convey.

I had that idea, too! We should totally go into business! Can you do app development? Just program an Arduino with a few buttons that activate specific scrolling messages. we could sell them on thinkgeek.com :)

I've had the exact same idea, down to the Arduino to run it. Nice to know it's not just me that thinks of these things.

/not a lot of people seem to understand "keep right except to pass" in this state
//also hate driving in the right lane on I-90 in the middle of WA state at night with some d-bag going the same speed as me, but in the left lane and just a little behind me, so their lights are hitting my side mirror and practically blinding me


except for the washington state reference, you could be my upstairs neighbor.  EE starting in on some Arduino coding a few weeks ago.  Put together a "working" Iron Man suit for his son last Halloween

/the lights, they blink
//all four of them...
 
2013-06-13 01:21:18 AM  

TwowheelinTim: lack of warmth: TwowheelinTim: S#!T, and I've been doing it for free all this time when I find a car parked in the bike lane.

The enzymes in saliva will eat through the toughest paint jobs. It almost breaks my heart when it's a really nice car the perpetrator has illegally parked, but not enough to keep me from leaving my mark.

I can only imagine how motor morons would react if I parked my bicycle in the automobile traffic lanes.

Yeah, I know, you'd just run over it wouldn't you mr/mrs tough guy.

Your accelerator pedal leg muscles must be pretty strong huh?

I drive a truck.  It isn't hard to pick up an 'abandoned' bicycle.  It also doesn't take long to cut a bike into scrap.

Cool your jets Francis, everyone gets crapped on.

Yeah, but not everybody is driving a 8000 pound cage.

If you don't like where I ride my bicycle, maybe you should take the bus.


Maybe you should learn the laws of traffic.
 
2013-06-13 01:26:02 AM  
How about an app that sends a ticket to dog owner's who don't clean up their dog's shiat?
 
2013-06-13 01:27:04 AM  

FizixJunkee: How about an app that sends a ticket to dog owner's who don't clean up their dog's shiat?


^whoops...apostrophe FAIL

\bed time
 
2013-06-13 02:02:25 AM  

Cerberus: I sort of like this idea. People parking in handicapped spaces and general parking douchebaggery should be dealt with.

But, I have an exception. I wouldn't want to snitch on a driver who forgot to feed the meter or is running afoul of a time restriction on parking. In these cases, let them take their chances with the meter maids. I suppose I'm thinking these people may have made 'mistakes' rather than purposeful douchebaggery and should have the benefit of the doubt until the little Parking Enforcement scooter comes around.

I frequently do business in one village that sets their parking meters for $0.25 per 2 hours. They really don't care about the revenue, but it encourages the freeing up of spaces to allow others to shop. Which was the original intent. If you can't put a quarter in, you probably deserve the ticket.


I think that's the divide in this thread. People who live in real cities versus those who live in places with lots of room, built around cars. If you live in DC or NY, the standard parking offense is going to be a time restriction on curb parking. People who get their panties in a wad because I've been parked in a 2 hr for 3 hours (say, in the middle of a residential area without much need for the restriction) need to get their heads examined, and the people who would actually go out and report that to parking enforcement are close to the worst kind of authoritarian douchebag. There are lots of heavy, some would say excessive, parking regulations, and they're already a massive headache and burden without Joe the Vigilante added to the mix.

But if you live in suburbia, where everything is a sea of parking lots and the only parking offenses you'll ever see are jackasses taking up 2 spots or parking in handicapped zones and where parking laws are only ever scarcely enforced, you might be more inclined to favor the idea.
 
2013-06-13 02:22:03 AM  
if this is limited to handicapped spots and fire hydrants then i don't see much of a problem. those are serious offenses with serious consequences for other people. reducing the number of offenders would make the world a better place.

i'm actually surprised we have not come up with a technological solution to those problems already. Put a mechanical barrier on the handicapped spots that is unlocked by a chip in the tag in the car. also, fire hydrants should have sound/visual alarms when you're too close, and should be able to notify parking enforcement themselves when someone obstructs one.

for some delightful justice, here's a handicapped permit abuse sting at a NASCAR race
 
2013-06-13 02:29:20 AM  
There's a supermarket in Des Moines where in the main entrance lane thru the parking lot there are two handicapped parking spaces on the left at then stgore end of the lane and then no parking hashmarks painted on the pavement as well as the crosswalk that runs from the sidewalk  between the two lanes to the entrance of the store.  People are always parking on those hashmarks.  More often than not, they are parking all kattywampus on them so that cars coming in have a tough time negotiating the turn.

Now some of them do have handicapped hang tags but still, the handicapped spots are clearly marked and it is abundently clear they are parking in no parking spots.  It just makes traffic in the lot all the more difficult.

I have taken to calling them on that if I see the drivers.  Most ignore me/pretend nbot to hear.  One black woman started screamingb obscenities at me and saying "I'll park any damn where I please, peckerwood!"

I guess I need to be more confrontational, as this is just getting worse by the day.
 
2013-06-13 09:47:05 AM  

scottydoesntknow: It will also become commonplace to beat people to a pulp if they're caught using said app

So I'm guessing subby follows the "snitches get stitches" street motto.

This is no different than CrimeStoppers or 222-TIPS. Those people get a reward for any information leading to arrests of individuals who broke the law.

Don't want to get a fine for illegally parking? Don't illegally park. I got some douchebag's car in my apartment complex towed because he insisted on double-parking his ugly truck over two handicapped spots (no placard of course). First I put a sign on his window saying "Stupidity is not a handicap. Park here again and I'll make sure it's towed." He challenged it so I called the office and watched as a tow truck came and picked it up.


Went to the mall on the way home from work. It was really croweded, so I had to park pretty far off. As I get to the front of the parking lot, there is a blinged out (chrome, huge rims,gold chain around license plate, spinners, fake engine ports, ect) Escalade parked across the two (and partially into a third) closest spots. Now I get you fell your car is precious, and the proletariat don't deserve to park next your shining chariot, less they mar it with the doors of their Kias. But that is why you take your sweet ass-car to an area that is empty near the outskirts of the lot. So since I had my work van with me, I trudged all the way back, got 4 drywall screws and placed one upright under each tire. I didn't actualy do any damage to his vehicle, as I only placed the screws on the ground.

/What I did may have been wrong, but this guy was a douche bag for parking like that, and I feel no remorse.
 
2013-06-13 11:11:24 AM  
EngineerAU:
I thought about wiring up a switch under the dash that would turn on my brake lights when I wasn't really braking to scare off tailgaters. I don't like to actually brake since they might not be paying attention and slam into me. With the light switch, they'd instinctively back off (even if slowly) without risking a collision. But I'm sure it's illegal as hell and would make me liable for the tailgater swerving or freaking out some other dangerous way when they see brake lights and think they can't slow down in time. It's especially annoying when I'm in the right most lane, going ten over the speed limit and there are five empty lanes to the left but the tailgater wants to bully me out of the lane.

Oh man, a friend of mine did that to a military truck back in the 70's in Germany. He also added a bumper sticker to his trailer in German that said "Smile as you go under" and would watch as sports cars slammed on the brakes and swerved when he hit that switch.  I wouldn't recommend it now though.

I know, I know CSB Bro.
 
2013-06-13 12:00:27 PM  

OgreMagi: I don't mind too many handicapped spaces when there is plenty of parking available. But too many times I've found myself circling around the BART parking lot trying to find a space with two entire rows of handicapped spaces sitting unused. At least they're dealing with that particular station and are currently building a multilevel parking garage (which has temporarily made the parking issue even worse).


Agreed.  It gets annoying when it's obvious they followed some formula that didn't consider conditions.  When the place served by the parking pretty much requires not being disabled then the number of handicapped spaces should be lower than normal.  I've had considerable walks because there were only handicapped spaces left--at trailheads!
 
2013-06-13 12:52:31 PM  

Aulus: There's a supermarket in Des Moines where in the main entrance lane thru the parking lot there are two handicapped parking spaces on the left at then stgore end of the lane and then no parking hashmarks painted on the pavement as well as the crosswalk that runs from the sidewalk  between the two lanes to the entrance of the store.  People are always parking on those hashmarks.  More often than not, they are parking all kattywampus on them so that cars coming in have a tough time negotiating the turn.

Now some of them do have handicapped hang tags but still, the handicapped spots are clearly marked and it is abundently clear they are parking in no parking spots.  It just makes traffic in the lot all the more difficult.



It's been forever since I took (and subsequently aced) my driver's exam, but I do recall one of the questions on the written portion of the test was something to the effect of "one may never park in hashed spaces, regardless of time of day, etc."   I always assumed everyone understood that hashed spaces were off-limits to everyone.
 
2013-06-13 01:27:08 PM  
Most of the illegally parked cars by where I work are either police cars who have cops too lazy to find a spot before going to dunkin donuts, or the same cops personal cars which are too important to have to bother to pay for a spot. Something tells me this will only result in trouble here, much as I'd love to see these self-entitled idiots ticketed I don't see it happening. A random beatdown for reporting, sure. And arresting and impounding of your car, certainly. A ticket being written, notsomuch.
 
2013-06-13 04:10:38 PM  

doglover: Justice is blind and the law is stupid. Give them no chance to eff you.

 
2013-06-13 04:40:44 PM  

FizixJunkee: Aulus: There's a supermarket in Des Moines where in the main entrance lane thru the parking lot there are two handicapped parking spaces on the left at then stgore end of the lane and then no parking hashmarks painted on the pavement as well as the crosswalk that runs from the sidewalk  between the two lanes to the entrance of the store.  People are always parking on those hashmarks.  More often than not, they are parking all kattywampus on them so that cars coming in have a tough time negotiating the turn.

Now some of them do have handicapped hang tags but still, the handicapped spots are clearly marked and it is abundently clear they are parking in no parking spots.  It just makes traffic in the lot all the more difficult.


It's been forever since I took (and subsequently aced) my driver's exam, but I do recall one of the questions on the written portion of the test was something to the effect of "one may never park in hashed spaces, regardless of time of day, etc."   I always assumed everyone understood that hashed spaces were off-limits to everyone.


Exactly!  Hnadicapped spaces have a handicapped sign and a painted symbol on the pavement.  Hasmarks have always meant no parking.  Always.  The off duty cop won't ticket them if they have a handicapped sticker, either.  Look, I'm 64 and have a bum knee that acts up and could possibly get a handicapped sticker, but I don't.  I have no problem parking at the fare end of the lot and walking the 50 yards to the entrance.  Why can't there bozos?
 
2013-06-13 05:13:56 PM  

MythDragon: /What I did may have been wrong, but this guy was a douche bag for parking like that, and I feel no remorse.


How about the people he swerves into on the freeway at 60 MPH when he loses control of his Escalade?  Where they douchebags, too?

Admittedly it can be fun to watch, at least from a distance, when a self-important street thug meets somebody with an underdeveloped frontal lobe.
 
2013-06-14 01:05:44 AM  

Aulus: FizixJunkee: Aulus: There's a supermarket in Des Moines where in the main entrance lane thru the parking lot there are two handicapped parking spaces on the left at then stgore end of the lane and then no parking hashmarks painted on the pavement as well as the crosswalk that runs from the sidewalk  between the two lanes to the entrance of the store.  People are always parking on those hashmarks.  More often than not, they are parking all kattywampus on them so that cars coming in have a tough time negotiating the turn.

Now some of them do have handicapped hang tags but still, the handicapped spots are clearly marked and it is abundently clear they are parking in no parking spots.  It just makes traffic in the lot all the more difficult.


It's been forever since I took (and subsequently aced) my driver's exam, but I do recall one of the questions on the written portion of the test was something to the effect of "one may never park in hashed spaces, regardless of time of day, etc."   I always assumed everyone understood that hashed spaces were off-limits to everyone.

Exactly!  Hnadicapped spaces have a handicapped sign and a painted symbol on the pavement.  Hasmarks have always meant no parking.  Always.  The off duty cop won't ticket them if they have a handicapped sticker, either.  Look, I'm 64 and have a bum knee that acts up and could possibly get a handicapped sticker, but I don't.  I have no problem parking at the fare end of the lot and walking the 50 yards to the entrance.  Why can't there bozos?


I'd honestly prefer that you got a sticker and parked in one of the usually over abundant handicapped spaces.  That way I can park in the regular space you are taking up now.  Think about it.
 
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