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(KHOU Houston)   Do you remember the debacle that happened the last time Carnival Triumph set out on a cruise? Apparently you're the only one who does because she's back at port and already her first two voyages are sold out   (khou.com) divider line 71
    More: Followup, Carnival Triumph, Galveston, fairs  
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2027 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jun 2013 at 9:16 AM (44 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-12 07:42:10 AM
It's the one ship in the fleet that you know for a fact has been freshly repaired and renovated.
 
2013-06-12 08:05:24 AM
They didn't even rename it? The sign in corporate headquarters must read "Number of Farks Given: 0"
 
2013-06-12 08:30:55 AM
I'm sure they vacuumed most of the carpets.
 
2013-06-12 08:35:52 AM
One of my first cruises was on that ship.

/had more fun than the law allows
//that's why it's so popular
 
2013-06-12 08:39:19 AM
Shutupandtakemymoney.jpg
 
2013-06-12 08:40:50 AM
www.carbonelawyer.com

"Which way to the poop deck?"

/Obvious
 
2013-06-12 09:04:14 AM
Of course they are sold out.  They were practically giving tickets away.  I looked into it a while back...IIRC, a 5 day cruise for the wife and I, in their least expensive inner stateroom was like $229 per person.  Airfare was more expensive that the cruise itself.
 
2013-06-12 09:17:29 AM
You'll never go broke appealing to the astronomically stupid.
 
2013-06-12 09:20:07 AM
Ugh, cruises are the WORST...factor in what you paid for a flight, the cruise itself and your bar bill and you could have flown direct to a nice all inclusive in Mexico....
 
2013-06-12 09:20:09 AM
"It's been pre-disastered. We're going to be safe here."
 
2013-06-12 09:20:32 AM
So will it take for people to stop taking those cruises?  Do pirates have to board and rape all the women and girls repeatedly over and over and over again until they die from blood loss?  Then They force the men to fark each other and boys over and over again until they die from blood loss.  Then they lop off their their peckers and shove them up their butts and cut off their heads and stick them on pikes all over the ship.  Then they take a dump and piss all over the corpses.

I'm guessing that won't even matter since they'll make the cruises cost 99 dollars and people will still go on them.
 
2013-06-12 09:21:56 AM

Endive Wombat: Of course they are sold out.  They were practically giving tickets away.  I looked into it a while back...IIRC, a 5 day cruise for the wife and I, in their least expensive inner stateroom was like $229 per person.  Airfare was more expensive that the cruise itself.


Yep.  Friends' daughter just got back from a dirt cheap cruise and now they're out on one.
 
2013-06-12 09:22:39 AM
I'd believe that after that, this ship was revamped and treated with every precaution that nothing happens again.

If anything, that's the best ship that they probably have now, and the safest, as every inch of her must have been checked in details. (like subby's mom)
 
2013-06-12 09:23:07 AM
After getting descriptions on what goes on during those cruises, and knowing that some of those ships are often booked by large swinger groups

...I'm just saying you guys may want to bring a black light with you so you realize you have to sleep in the closet to avoid contamination.
 
2013-06-12 09:23:18 AM
cdn09.realitynation.com

www.trackur.com

static.guim.co.uk
If there's one thing Americans aren't scared of, it's being surrounded by/covered in shiat.
 
2013-06-12 09:24:08 AM
Wonder if  these cruises were sold out before the disasters, and what cancellation penalties are.
 
2013-06-12 09:24:16 AM
I've had sex in worse places.
 
2013-06-12 09:24:19 AM
Lots of land-lover hysteria in this thread. I'm assuming you drama-queens are using hand-sanitizer correctly after posting?
 
2013-06-12 09:26:15 AM

oldfarthenry: Lots of land-lover hysteria in this thread. I'm assuming you drama-queens are using hand-sanitizer correctly after posting?


I masturbate with it to Johnson and Johnson ads
 
2013-06-12 09:27:15 AM

FullMetalPanda: So will it take for people to stop taking those cruises?  Do pirates have to board and rape all the women and girls repeatedly over and over and over again until they die from blood loss?  Then They force the men to fark each other and boys over and over again until they die from blood loss.  Then they lop off their their peckers and shove them up their butts and cut off their heads and stick them on pikes all over the ship.  Then they take a dump and piss all over the corpses.

I'm guessing that won't even matter since they'll make the cruises cost 99 dollars and people will still go on them.


Some would pay extra for all that.

content7.flixster.com
 
2013-06-12 09:29:25 AM
Given the number of cruise lines that have had issues this year, prices are at near all time lows.  and these rubes will never turn down a sale, no matter how bad the boat's management is.  Remember, a lot of the folks getting back on that ship are the same people who trample each other to get $25 LCDs from Walmart on Black Friday.
 
2013-06-12 09:29:39 AM

FullMetalPanda: So will it take for people to stop taking those cruises?  Do pirates have to board and rape all the women and girls repeatedly over and over and over again until they die from blood loss?  Then They force the men to fark each other and boys over and over again until they die from blood loss.  Then they lop off their their peckers and shove them up their butts and cut off their heads and stick them on pikes all over the ship.  Then they take a dump and piss all over the corpses.

I'm guessing that won't even matter since they'll make the cruises cost 99 dollars and people will still go on them.


[thatescalatedquickly.jpg]
 
2013-06-12 09:30:36 AM

oldfarthenry: Lots of land-lover hysteria in this thread. I'm assuming you drama-queens are using hand-sanitizer correctly after posting?


No, it's more like floating-death-trap-shiat-storm avoidance.
 
2013-06-12 09:32:30 AM

Elegy: It's the one ship in the fleet that you know for a fact has been freshly repaired and renovated.


This. Ordinarily right after a disaster is the safest time to {fly in an airplane|visit a bombed tourist trap|whatever}.

/OTOH this is Carnival
//And they don't seem to learn...
 
2013-06-12 09:33:48 AM
I think I'd quite like a cruise, as I'm spectauclarly lazy and if you're at sea then no one can pester you to 'walk around the historic centre', or 'do a guided tour of the tannery', etc etc.

That said, I really, really really don't want to drown, so I think I'll give it a miss.
 
2013-06-12 09:34:12 AM
Video from the "disaster"-cruise:  http://www.hulu.com/watch/457654
 
2013-06-12 09:34:16 AM
I am suprised- or maybe not, since its Carnival- that the degree of damage sustained could be fixed in that short of time.
 
2013-06-12 09:38:23 AM

Lady J: I think I'd quite like a cruise, as I'm spectauclarly lazy and if you're at sea then no one can pester you to 'walk around the historic centre', or 'do a guided tour of the tannery', etc etc.


Cruises tend to make stops where people can do day trips.
 
2013-06-12 09:39:52 AM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: Given the number of cruise lines that have had issues this year, prices are at near all time lows.  and these rubes will never turn down a sale, no matter how bad the boat's management is.  Remember, a lot of the folks getting back on that ship are the same people who trample each other to get $25 LCDs from Walmart on Black Friday.


Based on this description, a cruise sounds like floating hell. I could put up with the backed up sewer systems, food poisoning, and general squalor, but the thought of spending a week on a boat with the type of people who are impressed by $25 Black Friday LCD TV's fills me with an unimaginable horror and disgust.
 
2013-06-12 09:42:47 AM

imfallen_angel: I'd believe that after that, this ship was revamped and treated with every precaution that nothing happens again.

If anything, that's the best ship that they probably have now, and the safest, as every inch of her must have been checked in details. (like subby's mom)


I doubt it. They just used a couple cases of Febreze and now she's back in service.
 
2013-06-12 09:44:11 AM
For a while I was planning to give a cruise a try. It sounded like a stress-free vacation, just a chance to pig out, chill on my laptop all day, and enjoy the scenery from a floating hotel room. If I get to spend a day or two in a foreign country as well, all the better.

I've since soured on the idea. When I was into it, I lived in Florida, about an hour away from a port cruises often leave from, but now I'm in Ohio, and would have to take a flight just to get on a boat, just to slowly sail to a destination I could reach in a tenth of the time if I just flew there directly. Also eating better now, so buffets have lost their appeal. And my new job is less stressful than my old one, so I have more time to relax, and spending a vacation doing nothing now sounds boring.
 
2013-06-12 09:46:02 AM

FullMetalPanda: So will it take for people to stop taking those cruises?  Do pirates have to board and rape all the women and girls repeatedly over and over and over again until they die from blood loss?  Then They force the men to fark each other and boys over and over again until they die from blood loss.  Then they lop off their their peckers and shove them up their butts and cut off their heads and stick them on pikes all over the ship.  Then they take a dump and piss all over the corpses.

I'm guessing that won't even matter since they'll make the cruises cost 99 dollars and people will still go on them.


That theme will cost you extra. and it's already sold out.
 
2013-06-12 09:46:59 AM

Elegy: It's the one ship in the fleet that you know for a fact has been freshly repaired and renovated.


This.
 
2013-06-12 09:50:57 AM

FrancoFile: oldfarthenry: Lots of land-lover hysteria in this thread. I'm assuming you drama-queens are using hand-sanitizer correctly after posting?

No, it's more like floating-death-trap-shiat-storm avoidance.


I've been on one cruise.

I didn't understand what was so great, and why people loved them.

My description is this:  It's like being on a floating Las Vegas, that you can't escape from.

Oh, and fat people stuffing themselves everywhere.  We hadn't even left port after boarding, and people were already lined up for the shiatty buffet food.
 
2013-06-12 09:51:55 AM
For some reason I'm imagining Craig T. Nelson at the end of "Poltergeist" except he's screaming "YOU NEVER MOVED THE FECES! YOU JUST PAINTED OVER IT!"
 
2013-06-12 09:52:46 AM
Been on Carnival twice.  Only one I enjoyed was the Paradise, back when she was smoke-free.  Even then you're talking about Denny's level food and eight-streets-away-from-the-Strip entertainment.   I think the thing I liked the most was the smokeless casino.  All of the serious assholes who hang out in ship casinos smoke, and they were on other boats.  First cruise I ever walked off of ahead in the casino.  Of course, my $500 bar tab for 7 days sorta put the pooch on that...

/don't cruise if you're a serious drinker
//buy their $25 unlimited soda package before you board
///avoid preplanned shore excursions like the plague.  They are expensive and you are herded like cattle.
////don't overspend on a cabin unless you plan to be entertaining there a LOT.  It's where you will sleep, shower, and screw.  That's all.
//on second thought, come spend your money in Central Florida.  Lord knows we need it.
 
2013-06-12 09:55:09 AM

tripleseven: FrancoFile: oldfarthenry: Lots of land-lover hysteria in this thread. I'm assuming you drama-queens are using hand-sanitizer correctly after posting?

No, it's more like floating-death-trap-shiat-storm avoidance.

I've been on one cruise.

I didn't understand what was so great, and why people loved them.

My description is this:  It's like being on a floating Las Vegas, that you can't escape from.

Oh, and fat people stuffing themselves everywhere.  We hadn't even left port after boarding, and people were already lined up for the shiatty buffet food.


Um, what were you expecting? It's like going to a bar & being shocked that people are drinking. `Duh' on your part.
 
2013-06-12 09:55:38 AM

BMFPitt: Elegy: It's the one ship in the fleet that you know for a fact has been freshly repaired and renovated.

This.


While I'm sure it has new wallpaper and carpet, do we know how extensive the renovation really was?  Were all the internal walls gutted and replaced so that any urine and feces that seeped into and behind the walls could be properly cleansed?
 
2013-06-12 09:58:38 AM

sboyle1020: Ugh, cruises are the WORST...factor in what you paid for a flight, the cruise itself and your bar bill and you could have flown direct to a nice all inclusive in Mexico....


But what if you don't want to go to Mexico?

/Booked my Spring 2014 cruise through the Panama Canal (the non-Mexican one)
 
2013-06-12 10:04:05 AM
We go to the same quite nice hotel in San Diego every year.  It's not cheap, but because we go there regularly, and I'm registered with them, they tip me off to deals.  The one I got last Cyber Monday was almost impossibly good.  But regardless, it's a relatively classy place (riffraff factor is low, although sadly not absent), I don't worry about the hallways flooded with raw sewage, and we always have a great, relaxing time.

I wouldn't go on one of those diarrhea cruises if you paid me.
 
2013-06-12 10:06:09 AM
FTFA, " It's in the best shape it's every going to be in," That's the funniest quote every!
 
2013-06-12 10:07:55 AM

FullMetalPanda: So will it take for people to stop taking those cruises?  Do pirates have to board and rape all the women and girls repeatedly over and over and over again until they die from blood loss?  Then They force the men to fark each other and boys over and over again until they die from blood loss.  Then they lop off their their peckers and shove them up their butts and cut off their heads and stick them on pikes all over the ship.  Then they take a dump and piss all over the corpses.

I'm guessing that won't even matter since they'll make the cruises cost 99 dollars and people will still go on them.



I think it's time you took a break from watching the Game of Thrones.
 
2013-06-12 10:09:55 AM

FullMetalPanda: So will it take for people to stop taking those cruises?  Do pirates have to board and rape all the women and girls repeatedly over and over and over again until they die from blood loss?  Then They force the men to fark each other and boys over and over again until they die from blood loss.  Then they lop off their their peckers and shove them up their butts and cut off their heads and stick them on pikes all over the ship.  Then they take a dump and piss all over the corpses.


Now tell us how you  really feel.
 
2013-06-12 10:18:23 AM

dahmers love zombie: Been on Carnival twice.  Only one I enjoyed was the Paradise, back when she was smoke-free.  Even then you're talking about Denny's level food and eight-streets-away-from-the-Strip entertainment.   I think the thing I liked the most was the smokeless casino.  All of the serious assholes who hang out in ship casinos smoke, and they were on other boats.  First cruise I ever walked off of ahead in the casino.  Of course, my $500 bar tab for 7 days sorta put the pooch on that...

/don't cruise if you're a serious drinker
//buy their $25 unlimited soda package before you board
///avoid preplanned shore excursions like the plague.  They are expensive and you are herded like cattle.
////don't overspend on a cabin unless you plan to be entertaining there a LOT.  It's where you will sleep, shower, and screw.  That's all.
//on second thought, come spend your money in Central Florida.  Lord knows we need it.


Carnival and Royal Caribbean have both added all inclusive for drinks for about 50 bucks a day.  Good deal if you like to drink alot, bad deal if you don't like being around a lot of drunk people (but if that was the case you shouldn't be on a cruise in the first place.)
 
2013-06-12 10:22:07 AM

oldfarthenry: Lots of land-loverlubber hysteria in this thread. I'm assuming you drama-queens are using hand-sanitizer correctly after posting?


FTFY

You lose points for not even knowing the correct terminology when trolling.
 
2013-06-12 10:28:18 AM

Carousel Beast: oldfarthenry: Lots of land-loverlubber hysteria in this thread. I'm assuming you drama-queens are using hand-sanitizer correctly after posting?

FTFY

You lose points for not even knowing the correct terminology when trolling.


For all intensive purposes it means the same thing.
 
2013-06-12 10:33:08 AM

thebigearl: Carnival and Royal Caribbean have both added all inclusive for drinks for about 50 bucks a day. Good deal if you like to drink alot, bad deal if you don't like being around a lot of drunk people (but if that was the case you shouldn't be on a cruise in the first place.)


We looked into that. Everyone over 21 in the cable has to purchase it. That's $100 a day, $700 for a 7 day cruise. Damn, that's a lot of drinking to make it worth while.
 
2013-06-12 10:33:23 AM
Shut up and take my money!

I'm sure they've put those paper sashes on the toilet seats so it's all good.
 
2013-06-12 10:34:15 AM

Wade_Wilson: For a while I was planning to give a cruise a try. It sounded like a stress-free vacation, just a chance to pig out, chill on my laptop all day, and enjoy the scenery from a floating hotel room. If I get to spend a day or two in a foreign country as well, all the better.

I've since soured on the idea. When I was into it, I lived in Florida, about an hour away from a port cruises often leave from, but now I'm in Ohio, and would have to take a flight just to get on a boat, just to slowly sail to a destination I could reach in a tenth of the time if I just flew there directly. Also eating better now, so buffets have lost their appeal. And my new job is less stressful than my old one, so I have more time to relax, and spending a vacation doing nothing now sounds boring.


Oddly, I cruise for the opposite reasons you describe. For me, I do it because I can cram alot into a vacation. I don't have to worry about food or lodging, I can just focus on organizing adventure activities at the ports, Most 7 day cruises visit 4-5 ports, so most days we are snorkeling or other actvity. Admittedly, this adds significant cost to the vacation and requires you to be somewhat adventurous. I pretty much do self guided activities and don't book through the cruiseline, which are more touristy tours. Foodwise,most of the food is what I call wedding reception quality, things you can do for alot of people. But I find the buffets easier for healthy options since there is always a salad bar, fresh fruit, many choices, etc. Its much harder to eat healthy and economical when you have to find three suitable restaurants each day and satisfy everyone in the family.

The average day for my family is eat breakfast at 7;00, go do some activity off the boat from 8:00 am to 2:00 pm, grab a late lunch and an afternoon nap. Eat dinner at 7:00 than go see the B-list comedian, fake game show or Vegas type show. Rinse and repeat each day.  Our last cruise I wish we had an extra sea day to relax more. The best part is if anyone in the group wants to do something different, they are free to do so. I think that is also why they are popular with multigenerational family vacations. Cruisers tend to be fairly loyal also, at least half the people you meet on ship have done multiple cruises.

To say people who cruise are like walmart BF shoppers is BS from my experience, maybe the short 3-4 day cruises are more cost critical people. But the majority of people I've met on 7 day cruises are mostly upper middle class families. The longer cruises are even more selective and enjoyable.
 
2013-06-12 10:44:32 AM

thebigearl: Carnival and Royal Caribbean have both added all inclusive for drinks for about 50 bucks a day. Good deal if you like to drink alot, bad deal if you don't like being around a lot of drunk people (but if that was the case you shouldn't be on a cruise in the first place.)


Proper cruise choice is a must.  Inexpensive cruises around Spring Break-time -- lots of drunk college-agers.  The same cruise in May or October -- not so much.

I've taken 3 Caribbean cruises with Carnival.  Plenty of heavy drinkers on board, but by avoiding the main pool in late afternoon and the dance clubs late at night I was never bothered by them.  In port, they tended to all take the "Rockin' Rick's All-The-Booze-You-Can-Handle Catamaran" excursion, not the reef snorkeling ones.

On the Alaskan cruise, I never saw a single drunk running to catch the ship before departure (a big spectator sport on the Caribbean ones).  Different clientele.
 
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