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(Komo)   Naked 19 year old woman is missing in forest, hundreds of volunteers are expected to help search   (komonews.com) divider line 48
    More: Strange, volunteers, forests, search teams  
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7654 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jun 2013 at 5:06 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-10 04:04:41 PM  
Panorimo servers explode.
 
2013-06-10 04:43:51 PM  
That's a particularly useful story there.

"There's a woman missing in the forest, but we're not going to tell you her name or what she looks like."
 
2013-06-10 04:49:20 PM  

Donnchadha: That's a particularly useful story there.

"There's a woman missing in the forest, but we're not going to tell you her name or what she looks like."


To be fair, any naked 19 year old they find is probably the one that's missing.

/I thought the fanny pack was an appropriate piece of equipment.
 
2013-06-10 05:02:33 PM  
Did she have a fanny pack or just stuff packed in her fanny?
 
2013-06-10 05:08:29 PM  

Donnchadha: That's a particularly useful story there.

"There's a woman missing in the forest, but we're not going to tell you her name or what she looks like."


How many naked 19 yo women do you think are running around in this particular forest, exactly?
 
2013-06-10 05:09:18 PM  

Jument: Donnchadha: That's a particularly useful story there.

"There's a woman missing in the forest, but we're not going to tell you her name or what she looks like."

How many naked 19 yo women do you think are running around in this particular forest, exactly?


In my dreams, there are thousands.
 
2013-06-10 05:10:31 PM  
Could you at least post a damn picture?  Kind of hard to ...find her... without knowing what she looks like.
 
2013-06-10 05:10:46 PM  
If it was winter, I'm sure someone would offer to share body heat with her.
 
2013-06-10 05:11:00 PM  
You know how you can tell someone has never been in the wilderness before?


They think things like, walking through the forest with no clothes or shoes on is going to be enjoyable.
 
2013-06-10 05:11:36 PM  
Guess they'll have to cut through the bush.
 
2013-06-10 05:11:42 PM  

Atomic Spunk: Jument: Donnchadha: That's a particularly useful story there.

"There's a woman missing in the forest, but we're not going to tell you her name or what she looks like."

How many naked 19 yo women do you think are running around in this particular forest, exactly?

In my dreams, there are thousands.


Well yes, that goes without saying.
 
2013-06-10 05:11:59 PM  
Did he get lost during this weekend's Naked Bike Ride in Portland?
 
2013-06-10 05:14:30 PM  

According to this article, she went on a spiritual quest.



I'm not far from there, maybe I'll go help look for the naked damsel in distress.
 
2013-06-10 05:14:56 PM  
next time could she be more considerate and get lost in florida
it is a long drive from here!
 
2013-06-10 05:15:28 PM  
"Well," the farmer said sadly. "One time I got lost."
 
2013-06-10 05:15:42 PM  
SKAMANIA COUNTY - A naked woman who went on a "spiritual quest" wearing only a fanny pack is now missing and a search and rescue effort is under way to find her.

It's funny because in the UK "fanny" means vagina.
 
2013-06-10 05:15:54 PM  
They don't call it "mad season" for naught.
 
2013-06-10 05:16:42 PM  
Damp W Washington forest, late spring, nude spirit quest. Somehow I think Shrooms were involved.
 
2013-06-10 05:17:28 PM  
Oh good lord! I think that Darwin is going to appear any moment now. Just think of the poison ivy..*shudders*..
 
2013-06-10 05:18:36 PM  
subtext is an anagram for buttsex
 
2013-06-10 05:19:33 PM  
I've seen a beaver in the forest..........
 
2013-06-10 05:20:13 PM  
I don't need to walk through a forest to find naked 19 year old girls. I have the internet.
 
2013-06-10 05:22:22 PM  

cig-mkr: I've seen a beaver in the forest..........


Sometimes you just can't see the beaver through the trees.
 
2013-06-10 05:23:53 PM  
i bet she was wearing shoes so not nekkid. i won't fark dead nekkid hikers.having shoes on is nasty.
 
2013-06-10 05:24:04 PM  
Let her go, Ralph. She knows what she's doin.
 
2013-06-10 05:24:38 PM  
She's fine.  Probably kicking back in the Black Lodge with that funny-talking midget about now.
 
2013-06-10 05:25:17 PM  

EdNortonsTwin: cig-mkr: I've seen a beaver in the forest..........

Sometimes you just can't see the beaver through the trees.

bush
FTFY
 
2013-06-10 05:26:08 PM  
at least she had her knife and compass... in her fanny... pack... I presume...

I'm picturing something from 'clan of the cave bear'... but with a fanny pack.
 
2013-06-10 05:29:11 PM  
cdn.media.discovermagazine.com
On call, if needed.
 
2013-06-10 05:29:43 PM  
"Okay, I've found you naked girl with a fanny pack. Now we negotiate the terms of your rescue. Gimme a hand job and you get my coat but I leave you here. Give me a hummer and I ..."
 
2013-06-10 05:33:36 PM  

skinink: "Okay, I've found you naked girl with a fanny pack. Now we negotiate the terms of your rescue. Gimme a hand job and you get my coat but I leave you here. Give me a hummer and I ..."


I understand you came out here on a 'spiritual quest'... well let me introduce you to your 'spirit animal'... the one-eyed spitting viper... don't be afraid of it... you need to find a way to 'become one' with your spirit animal... I'll be here to answer any questions.
 
2013-06-10 05:37:41 PM  

BumpInTheNight: Could you at least post a damn picture?  Kind of hard to ...find her... without knowing what she looks like.


Yes, I too, want a picture of her.

To...rescue her.   That's it.

/I'm only a thirty hour drive away, why do you ask?
 
2013-06-10 05:40:51 PM  
Diane, 7:30 am, February twenty-fourth. Diane, 7:30 am, June Tenth. Never seen so many trees in my life. As W.C. Fields would say, I'd rather be here than Philadelphia. It's fifty-four degrees on a slightly overcast day. Weatherman said rain. If you could get paid that kind of money for being wrong sixty percent of the time it'd beat working. Mileage is 79,345, gauge is on reserve, I'm riding on fumes here, I've got to tank up when I get into town. Remind me to tell you how much that is. Lunch was $6.31 at the Lamplighter Inn. That's on Highway Two near Lewis Fork. That was a tuna fish sandwich on whole wheat, a slice of cherry pie and a cup of coffee. Damn good food. Diane, if you ever get up this way, that cherry pie is worth a stop.

/She's dead, wrapped in plastic.
//The owls fly at night.
 
2013-06-10 05:41:46 PM  

Stabone33: Diane, 7:30 am, February twenty-fourth. Diane, 7:30 am, June Tenth.


Whoopsy daisy.
 
2013-06-10 05:50:45 PM  
Announce that she's 5 ft 3 and weighs 320 and watch the volunteers disappear
 
2013-06-10 05:58:47 PM  

Brick-House: Announce that she's 5 ft 3 and weighs 320 and watch the volunteers disappear


Well, she couldn't have gotten far then....
 
2013-06-10 06:19:01 PM  

pnome: Brick-House: Announce that she's 5 ft 3 and weighs 320 and watch the volunteers disappear

Well, she couldn't have gotten far then....


Depends on how she rolls.
 
2013-06-10 06:22:15 PM  

Brick-House: Announce that she's 5 ft 3 and weighs 320 and watch the volunteers disappear


You would still have plenty of volunteers, but they would all be black.
 
2013-06-10 06:27:12 PM  
We don't have a name? So when we see her do we just yell, "Yo biatch, I'm ova' here!"
 
2013-06-10 06:34:18 PM  
Bring Linden and Holder down from Seattle. They'll find her quickly. She'll be dead, but they'll solve the case in a season or two, and by the time they're done we'll know the dirty little secrets of everyone in the area.
 
2013-06-10 07:18:55 PM  

coolpapabell: Brick-House: Announce that she's 5 ft 3 and weighs 320 and watch the volunteers disappear

You would still have plenty of volunteers, but they would all be black.




Nice!
 
2013-06-10 07:27:18 PM  
Another naked chick in a forest?!

I spend 3 months at a time in a forest and I have yet to see a naked chick walk by... The wife doesn't count...

WelldeadLink: pnome: Brick-House: Announce that she's 5 ft 3 and weighs 320 and watch the volunteers disappear

Well, she couldn't have gotten far then....

Depends on how she rolls.


That's why even animals are scared of her.
 
2013-06-10 08:06:38 PM  

Sofa King Smart: skinink: "Okay, I've found you naked girl with a fanny pack. Now we negotiate the terms of your rescue. Gimme a hand job and you get my coat but I leave you here. Give me a hummer and I ..."

I understand you came out here on a 'spiritual quest'... well let me introduce you to your 'spirit animal'... the one-eyed spitting viper... don't be afraid of it... you need to find a way to 'become one' with your spirit animal... I'll be here to answer any questions.

IMHO, oftimes 'spiritual quest implies hallucinogens.
 
2013-06-10 09:58:59 PM  

Atomic Spunk: Jument: Donnchadha: That's a particularly useful story there.

"There's a woman missing in the forest, but we're not going to tell you her name or what she looks like."

How many naked 19 yo women do you think are running around in this particular forest, exactly?

In my dreams, there are thousands.


Too close to Seattle.

If she attends SPU, there will be an out break of Bigfoot sightings.
 
2013-06-10 10:01:38 PM  

Massa Damnata: You know how you can tell someone has never been in the wilderness before?
They think things like, walking through the forest with no clothes or shoes on is going to be enjoyable.


But Mother Nature is kind and nuturing to all her creatures!
 
2013-06-10 10:31:04 PM  
Ok can someone tell someone I'm lost in the woods too? Look for the naked neckbeard guy with condoms cigarettes and beer
 
VTC
2013-06-10 11:52:06 PM  

Stabone33: Diane, 7:30 am, February twenty-fourth. Diane, 7:30 am, June Tenth. Never seen so many trees in my life. As W.C. Fields would say, I'd rather be here than Philadelphia. It's fifty-four degrees on a slightly overcast day. Weatherman said rain. If you could get paid that kind of money for being wrong sixty percent of the time it'd beat working. Mileage is 79,345, gauge is on reserve, I'm riding on fumes here, I've got to tank up when I get into town. Remind me to tell you how much that is. Lunch was $6.31 at the Lamplighter Inn. That's on Highway Two near Lewis Fork. That was a tuna fish sandwich on whole wheat, a slice of cherry pie and a cup of coffee. Damn good food. Diane, if you ever get up this way, that cherry pie is worth a stop.

/She's dead, wrapped in plastic.
//The owls fly at night.


Dude, those owls are not what they appear.
 
2013-06-11 12:55:23 AM  
Google "Missing 411" and prepare to be freaked out.
 
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