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(Vice)   Sometimes a music review is vaguely ambiguous to defer to different tastes and styles. Then there's this one   (vice.com) divider line 66
    More: Amusing, Warped Tour, NOFX, Fall Out Boy, Kerrang, defecations, Skrillex, choirboy, Ronnie Radke  
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5865 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 02 Jun 2013 at 10:30 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-06-02 09:22:27 PM  
After watching about 25 seconds of that video, I believe the gentleman raises many fine points.
 
2013-06-02 09:59:11 PM  
Ronnie Radke is notoriously a total prick and the fact that people keep paying him to release his "music" is utterly baffling to pretty much everyone in the "scene" (however you define that word) or who listens to the music his crap is lumped in with.

As far as I have grasped, absolutely nobody likes him or wants to play with him, and yet.... he has some sort of unexplained success.
 
2013-06-02 10:34:59 PM  
That wasn't very metal.
 
2013-06-02 10:35:36 PM  
I've heard better tonal quality out of a turd splattering after a 30 foot fall down an outhouse
 
2013-06-02 10:36:54 PM  
Queercore is a type of music?
 
2013-06-02 10:43:23 PM  

HempHead: Queercore is a type of music?


That's where I stopped. I figured whatever queercore is, I don't care enough about it.
 
2013-06-02 10:43:24 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: I've heard better tonal quality out of a turd splattering after a 30 foot fall down an outhouse


What's tonal quality?
 
2013-06-02 10:47:36 PM  
Then there's Maddox's 11 worst songs of 2004

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=11worst


/spoiler alert: they're all on the same U2 album
 
2013-06-02 10:48:15 PM  

knight_on_the_rail: Smeggy Smurf: I've heard better tonal quality out of a turd splattering after a 30 foot fall down an outhouse

What's tonal quality?


It's like farting in two part harmony.  If you get that, you'll understand
 
2013-06-02 10:49:31 PM  
Punks: the original obscurist hipsters.
 
2013-06-02 10:55:38 PM  
I'm not sure if that's trying to be bad hip-hop, bad pop nu-metal, or bad dance music. Got the bad part down so I guess they succeeded at something.
 
2013-06-02 10:56:22 PM  
Pampers, motherfarker!
 
2013-06-02 11:01:19 PM  

Dave and the Mission: Then there's Maddox's 11 worst songs of 2004

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=11worst

/spoiler alert: they're all on the same U2 album


That is awesome.
 
kab
2013-06-02 11:08:09 PM  
Yet this bands 2nd album was in the Billboard top 20 in it's first week out.

Proof that blindingly atrocious taste in music knows no genre limitations.
 
2013-06-02 11:11:03 PM  
They're signed to Epitaph???

Oh, Brett. For shame.

Yeah, I sat through the whole thing. The reviewer is actually being a bit reserved in quantifying the level of suck found here.

As far as the above poster mentioning queeercore, like any genre, there is some good and some bad. Pansy Division is a routinely cited band in terms of modern influence.
 
2013-06-02 11:20:19 PM  

Dave and the Mission: Then there's Maddox's 11 worst songs of 2004

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=11worst


/spoiler alert: they're all on the same U2 album



HAHAHAHA.

Thanks for that link and website....there goes the rest of my night.
 
2013-06-02 11:21:50 PM  
The next time someone tells me "music is subjective", I'll play this song for them.
 
2013-06-02 11:22:45 PM  

Mentalpatient87: HempHead: Queercore is a type of music?

That's where I stopped. I figured whatever queercore is, I don't care enough about it.


You're missing out on some comedy gold.
 
2013-06-02 11:26:27 PM  

Dave and the Mission: Then there's Maddox's 11 worst songs of 2004

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=11worst


/spoiler alert: they're all on the same U2 album


Ah, so I'm not the only person that dislikes U2 and thinks Bono is a giant douche.  Didn't he recently get caught doing some questionable things to avoid taxes?  Yeah, rich asshole calling me a selfish prick because I'm not giving enough money away.
 
2013-06-02 11:35:16 PM  
FTA: The synths sound like gangrenous piss.

Can piss get gangrene?  I mean, is that even a biological possibility?
 
2013-06-02 11:35:29 PM  

Mentalpatient87: HempHead: Queercore is a type of music?

That's where I stopped. I figured whatever queercore is, I don't care enough about it.

 
2013-06-02 11:36:40 PM  
 
2013-06-02 11:43:12 PM  
The middle finger is no longer the fist in the air in the land of hypocrisy that it was in 1999.

1999? The finger was edgy counterculture in 1999!? Oh, we are young, aren't we little hipster?
 
2013-06-02 11:48:11 PM  
Wow.

That was beyond terrible.
 
2013-06-02 11:53:11 PM  

OgreMagi: Dave and the Mission: Then there's Maddox's 11 worst songs of 2004

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=11worst


/spoiler alert: they're all on the same U2 album

Ah, so I'm not the only person that dislikes U2 and thinks Bono is a giant douche.  Didn't he recently get caught doing some questionable things to avoid taxes?  Yeah, rich asshole calling me a selfish prick because I'm not giving enough money away.


You're far from alone in thinking Bono is a giant douche. I remember this sculpture being a news item a few years ago:
i1243.photobucket.com
Frans Smeets - Jesus Loves You Too

"The sculpture "Jesus Loves you Too (U2)" depicts the Irish rockstar in a long white robe similar to those that Jesus is often depicted in, only this one is labeled with a Nike symbol. The look is topped off with Emporio Armani sunglasses. At Bono's feet is an emaciated African infant whose eyes lie startlingly wide open. Its mouth is open as well, as if it is crying out, but the cry seems to fall on deaf ears, as Bono looks straight ahead and appears uninterested, even as he holds out his hands, palms facing upward.The sculpture seems to match recent criticism over Bono's activism, particularly his DATA (Debt, AIDS, Trade Africa) organization and its Product Red campaign."
 
2013-06-03 12:01:49 AM  
I also wanted to say, this is what happens when you let kids listen to crap like Linkin Park and Skrillex.

We tried to warn you, but did you listen?  No.
 
2013-06-03 12:11:37 AM  
That video is one of the few things lately that make me feel glad I'm old. And childless.
 
2013-06-03 12:21:51 AM  

Confabulat: That video is one of the few things lately that make me feel glad I'm old. And childless.


I'm glad my children have better taste in music than whatever that was.
 
2013-06-03 12:25:51 AM  
Area music reviewer does not like Pansy Division
 
2013-06-03 12:28:30 AM  

Glitchwerks: I also wanted to say, this is what happens when you let kids listen to crap like Linkin Park and Skrillex.

We tried to warn you, but did you listen?  No.


i'd rather sit through a 3-hour spoken word Linkin Park show than watch the first minute of that video again
 
2013-06-03 12:37:19 AM  
Sunglasses indoors, obviously, the Coca-Cola of things that immediately mark people out as douches.

If you are not sensitive to light, stop wearing sunglasses in places with little light; you make me look like a prick... more of a prick.
 
2013-06-03 12:45:35 AM  
So that's what a "sown-up cat's bung" sounds like.
 
2013-06-03 01:05:18 AM  
That haircut reminds me of Zorg.
 
2013-06-03 01:06:57 AM  
Sorry reviewer but Motley Crew owns more than every other band mentioned in that review combined
 
2013-06-03 01:07:18 AM  
This is still my favorite music review of all time. Pitchfork savages bands they don't like, but I've never seen anyone else get a 0.0 rating from them.
 
2013-06-03 01:10:03 AM  
I mean Crue. I'm a bad person
 
2013-06-03 02:09:42 AM  
I've been listening to too much Swedish black metal lately to know what Joy Division or this new psuedoband are more than flashing lights on a tac display.

Of course, if you know what the last six words of that sentence were from you'd know where I've really been dug into.

Good review. If I could generate that much bile on a regular basis I could write a decent blog.
 
2013-06-03 02:20:23 AM  

wildcardjack: I've been listening to too much Swedish black metal lately to know what Joy Division or this new psuedoband are more than flashing lights on a tac display.

Of course, if you know what the last six words of that sentence were from you'd know where I've really been dug into.

Good review. If I could generate that much bile on a regular basis I could write a decent blog.


Maybe I'm part of a small overlap in fans, but both Joy Division and Swedish black metal can be pretty cool. Here's some black metal musicians attempting a neo-coldwave/darkwave sound: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XImwQFU_YTA

/The band is Soror Dolorosa, if you'd like to know what to expect before clicking.
 
2013-06-03 02:26:42 AM  
you see, this just isn't fair.  I'm 41 years old, and so I keep expecting to reach that point where the good and quality music the kids are listening to sounds like crap because I'm old, like the cliche'.  I accept this could happen, but when I hear shiat like this, I fear it has.  Then I read the comments and am reassured it's just shiatty music, and I haven't become 'get off my lawn guy'.
 
2013-06-03 02:48:32 AM  
Meh. VICE is already well down the path of selling out. I don't check 'em out anymore.
 
2013-06-03 02:58:43 AM  

frostus: Confabulat: That video is one of the few things lately that make me feel glad I'm old. And childless.

I'm glad my children have better taste in music than whatever that was.


Lucky you.  My stepdaughter liked Greenday.  I should have known she was no good at that point.
 
2013-06-03 03:01:47 AM  
Emos and all those "core" bands killed rock. Those guys make nu metal look great in comparison.
 
2013-06-03 03:07:08 AM  

Anonymous Bosch: 1999? The finger was edgy counterculture in 1999!? Oh, we are young, aren't we little hipster?


It's a reference to a Rage Against the Machine song (Wake Up), thought that particular song came out in 92, so still a fail from the writer.
 
2013-06-03 03:20:37 AM  
I don't see the problem here.

It's a classic exploration of the duality of human nature.

First, we get white boy rapping about being a wealthy rapping badass where he shows how badass he is ("fark all you biatches," "fark you too.").

Then we show the softer side by jumping into a cut-rate Nickelback chorus:
"This is the end of everything that I've known,
no way of knowing if I'll never be home
 I don't ever want to be alone"

Intersperse dude with suit jacket, representing our buttoned down working nature, but then slam into unfocused camera cuts of his sweet tattooed abs to remind us of our physical humanity and our creative, expressive capabilities.

And then comes the wild card robot voice rapping:

"I'm on that wreck
 Fly like a jet
Switching my lanes like I'm racing a Vette
I'm on that next
Girl of Sex
No doubt on top of the world
Break your neck (Break your motherfarking neck)."

Repeat Chorus.

Flip off camera.

Fin.


/See.  It all makes sense after all.
 
2013-06-03 04:02:36 AM  
This guy somehow made a song that combines my 3 favorite genres (hip-hop, rock, and electronic) but my least favorite sub genres within those genres (ignant bling bling rap, emo and buttrock, and poppy "EDM" crap). I'd say the review was on point, I'm happy I've never heard of this guy's music before and I'll never listen to it again.
 
2013-06-03 04:20:58 AM  
He kinda has The Hound's look going on.
 
2013-06-03 05:33:04 AM  
nice to hear that the punk scene has a fratfark bro problem just as bad as the electronic scene.

heh.
 
2013-06-03 05:44:01 AM  

Ishkur: nice to hear that the punk scene has a fratfark bro problem just as bad as the electronic scene.

heh.


Hey man, I was perusing the internet to look into the history of the electronic music (was looking into the influences that hip-hop and electronic music have had on each other) and I found my way to your guide and it was so damn amazing. I could tell it wasn't updated since the early to mid 00s (based on the latest genres on there like crunk and such), so I was wondering if you were going to update that guide.

/Blondie didn't invent hip-hop, I kind of hoped that part was a joke because the guide in general was hella dope.
 
2013-06-03 05:48:49 AM  

OgreMagi: Dave and the Mission: Then there's Maddox's 11 worst songs of 2004

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=11worst


/spoiler alert: they're all on the same U2 album

Ah, so I'm not the only person that dislikes U2 and thinks Bono is a giant douche.  Didn't he recently get caught doing some questionable things to avoid taxes?  Yeah, rich asshole calling me a selfish prick because I'm not giving enough money away.


Ah yes, but Bono needs all the money he has. Otherwise, how's he going to afford first-class airline seats for his hat?
 
2013-06-03 05:52:28 AM  

TheJoe03: Hey man, I was perusing the internet to look into the history of the electronic music (was looking into the influences that hip-hop and electronic music have had on each other) and I found my way to your guide and it was so damn amazing. I could tell it wasn't updated since the early to mid 00s (based on the latest genres on there like crunk and such), so I was wondering if you were going to update that guide.


Ah, so NOW you're coming along. Great to have you with us.

Yes, a new guide is imminent. It will be 10x bigger than the old one.

TheJoe03: /Blondie didn't invent hip-hop, I kind of hoped that part was a joke because the guide in general was hella dope.


Almost the whole guide is a joke. It's one big sarcastic pisstake.

(scroll down)
 
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