If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(NJ.com)   Wanted fugitive carrying 400 decks of heroin drives solo in the carpool lane. That MONSTER   (nj.com) divider line 37
    More: Dumbass, HOV lane, state troopers, Pennsylvania, New Jersey State Police, Pennsylvania State Police, Middlesex County, New Jersey Turnpike, heroin  
•       •       •

3700 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Jun 2013 at 8:36 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



37 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-06-01 08:44:16 AM
News flash:  Criminals occasionally break the law.
 
2013-06-01 08:47:08 AM
Heroin should be legal.

Carpool lanes should be illegal.

Smugglers shouldn't get caught.


So my give-a-shiat-o-meter is not spikin' on this one. I do not care at all.
 
2013-06-01 08:48:40 AM
How much is a deck? Is it the size of a deck of playing cards? Is it, like, one hit in a little baggie? I could look this up, but I don't really care.
 
2013-06-01 08:50:47 AM
. . . singing to himself: "I don't know just where I'm goin. . . "
 
2013-06-01 08:51:58 AM
Deck = dime bag of old
 
2013-06-01 08:51:59 AM

mbillips: How much is a deck? Is it the size of a deck of playing cards? Is it, like, one hit in a little baggie? I could look this up, but I don't really care.


.8745 Adeles
 
2013-06-01 08:52:30 AM
Drivers must have three or more people inside their cars to travel in the HOV lane during certain times, Grossman explained. For the New Jersey Turnpike headed southbound, that time is 4 to 7 p.m., he said.

Now there's a good closing paragraph in an article about a guy who is distributing heroin.
You know, as if the lesson we should take away from this is: don't drive in the carpool lane!
 
2013-06-01 08:57:33 AM

doglover: Carpool lanes should be illegal.


eh?
 
2013-06-01 08:58:29 AM

NutWrench: Drivers must have three or more people inside their cars to travel in the HOV lane during certain times, Grossman explained. For the New Jersey Turnpike headed southbound, that time is 4 to 7 p.m., he said.

Now there's a good closing paragraph in an article about a guy who is distributing heroin.
You know, as if the lesson we should take away from this is: don't drive in the carpool lane!


Hey, car pool lane abuse harms society.
 
2013-06-01 09:07:29 AM
You would have to be at a pretty bad place in life to be buying your horse $10 at a time.
 
2013-06-01 09:07:53 AM
I take it "deck" is a standard junkie unit of measure.
 
2013-06-01 09:07:53 AM
noun.files.wordpress.com

/Sperry
 
2013-06-01 09:13:33 AM

HotIgneous Intruder: I take it "deck" is a standard junkie unit of measure.


1 deck = 1.5 bindles
and knowing is .5 the battle
 
2013-06-01 09:15:13 AM

bigbobowski: HotIgneous Intruder: I take it "deck" is a standard junkie unit of measure.

1 deck = 1.5 bindles
and knowing is .5 the battle


So, how many battles to the bindle?
 
2013-06-01 09:15:18 AM
I'm surprised he wasn't armed, but good for him cause he'd be so screwed and he's clearly not the brightest getting busted this way.
 
2013-06-01 09:19:11 AM
When I finally decide to leave the hectic world of booth-mopping and start moving heroin I'm going to buy a 2010 Buick in a variant of beige, have it governed to go no faster than 67 mph and hire a middle-aged white couple to drive it, letting them festoon the thing with as many "ask me about my grandchildren" and "Don't blame me, I voted for Palin" stickers as they want.

The biggest question then is: should my private island fortress be leeward side or windward side?
 
2013-06-01 09:20:03 AM
deckers gonna deck
 
2013-06-01 09:24:59 AM
You'd think a fugitive from the police would not want to draw attention by breaking any laws.
 
2013-06-01 09:26:58 AM
Mr. Coffee Nerves:
The biggest question then is: should my private island fortress be leeward side or windward side?

You're pretty much screwed either way:

Windward: you get all the storms, and can't pee off the deck.
Leeward: You'd think you could pee off the deck, but the vortex from the building will still blow it back in your face.

Best to go for the underground lair. Better hurry, all the good volcanos will be gone soon!
 
2013-06-01 09:27:12 AM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: The biggest question then is: should my private island fortress be leeward side or windward side?


As long as your island has a volcano, legions of henchmen in ill-fitting spandex and access to a giant space laser, you should be ok.
 
2013-06-01 09:28:25 AM
"When the troopers approached Gholston's car, they smelled marijuana coming from inside the car"

Let's be fair.  The dude was stoned.  Change the dumbass tag to silly.
 
2013-06-01 09:32:09 AM
What's a Deck?

encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
 
2013-06-01 09:40:57 AM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: When I finally decide to leave the hectic world of booth-mopping and start moving heroin I'm going to buy a 2010 Buick in a variant of beige, have it governed to go no faster than 67 mph and hire a middle-aged white couple to drive it, letting them festoon the thing with as many "ask me about my grandchildren" and "Don't blame me, I voted for Palin" stickers as they want.

The biggest question then is: should my private island fortress be leeward side or windward side?


I'm going to go ahead and suggest that this kind of thinking makes you unsuitable for a career in heroin smuggling.  You have middle management written all over you.
 
2013-06-01 09:48:37 AM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: When I finally decide to leave the hectic world of booth-mopping and start moving heroin I'm going to buy a 2010 Buick in a variant of beige, have it governed to go no faster than 67 mph and hire a middle-aged white couple to drive it, letting them festoon the thing with as many "ask me about my grandchildren" and "Don't blame me, I voted for Palin" stickers as they want.


My son, my son...you will have a midlife crisis.  Entombing your future inside a vehicle of middle-aged white people yakking about menopause, their bowel movements and idiot grandchildren, only to hang yourself to escape a lifetime of boredom, your family will ask "Why?  Why didn't he follow his booth-mopping dreams?"
 
2013-06-01 10:05:44 AM

doglover: Heroin should be legal.

Carpool lanes should be illegal.

Smugglers shouldn't get caught.


So my give-a-shiat-o-meter is not spikin' on this one. I do not care at all.


Fark you and fark you.

Nothing makes my day like taking down license plates of carpool violators and reporting them. Farking assholes.
 
2013-06-01 10:13:13 AM

love_alice: News flash:  Criminals occasionally break the law.


And get to be on TV and the Internet, too.

/"Bad-boys bad-boys, whatcha gonna do when they come for you?"
 
2013-06-01 10:27:19 AM
Not shown: the driver was also carrying 600 hammocks of cheese.
 
2013-06-01 11:09:24 AM

Your Average Witty Fark User: doglover: Heroin should be legal.

Carpool lanes should be illegal.

Smugglers shouldn't get caught.


So my give-a-shiat-o-meter is not spikin' on this one. I do not care at all.

Fark you and fark you.

Nothing makes my day like taking down license plates of carpool violators and reporting them. Farking assholes.


such an exciting life you lead
 
2013-06-01 11:16:55 AM
it's only logical. When you're toting a whole bunch of drugs, you should spend as little time on the road as possible.

--He thought, while on heroin AND WEED. I keep telling you guys that that stuff destroys your brain.
 
2013-06-01 11:34:10 AM
He should just have picked up a hooker to sit in the front seat.
 
2013-06-01 11:50:49 AM

mbillips: How much is a deck? Is it the size of a deck of playing cards? Is it, like, one hit in a little baggie? I could look this up, but I don't really care.


A deck is ten bags.
 
2013-06-01 12:21:39 PM

bigbobowski: HotIgneous Intruder: I take it "deck" is a standard junkie unit of measure.

1 deck = 1.5 bindles
and knowing is .5 the battle


1/2 knowing, 1/4 blue lasers, 1/4 red lasers

\stolen
 
2013-06-01 03:13:34 PM

doglover: Heroin should be legal.

Carpool lanes should be illegal.

Smugglers shouldn't get caught.


So my give-a-shiat-o-meter is not spikin' on this one. I do not care at all.


There shouldn't even be lanes, man. Or redlights. Just open road and freedom.
 
2013-06-01 03:40:10 PM

Vodka Zombie: bigbobowski: HotIgneous Intruder: I take it "deck" is a standard junkie unit of measure.

1 deck = 1.5 bindles
and knowing is .5 the battle

So, how many battles to the bindle?


I have no idea, but I know its five bees for a quarter.

/The Kiaser stole our word of twenty in nineteen dickitity three
 
2013-06-01 08:18:31 PM
Seriously Barry ,what's a deck? You're talking in circles buddy.
 
2013-06-01 08:48:00 PM

AgentPothead: Seriously Barry ,what's a deck? You're talking in circles buddy.


A deck is a 10-spot.

FTA, he had 410 decks worth "about 4000 dollars".
 
2013-06-01 10:31:48 PM

HotIgneous Intruder: I take it "deck" is a standard junkie unit of measure.


www.wpclipart.com
 
Displayed 37 of 37 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report