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(Short List)   And the award for the biggest badass in the bird world goes to:   (shortlist.com) divider line 148
    More: Hero, swans  
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20966 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 May 2013 at 1:04 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-31 12:11:59 PM
FTA: "Both had bashes to their beaks which suggested catapults had been used on them."

Is that a thing?
 
2013-05-31 12:36:31 PM
static.giantbomb.com
 
2013-05-31 01:06:18 PM
myfutureme.net
 
2013-05-31 01:07:18 PM
While Humans simultaneously retain their hold on biggest douchebag species title.
 
2013-05-31 01:08:17 PM
Swan Lifeline is a thing?
 
2013-05-31 01:08:20 PM

brimed03: While Humans simultaneously retain their hold on biggest douchebag species title.


This.
 
2013-05-31 01:08:22 PM

Pray 4 Mojo: FTA: "Both had bashes to their beaks which suggested catapults had been used on them."

Is that a thing?


slingshot?
 
2013-05-31 01:08:25 PM
Stupid people with airguns deserve to get shot with real bullets.
 
2013-05-31 01:09:04 PM
The answer Subby is always boobies.
 
2013-05-31 01:09:05 PM
Swans can be terrifying. Teams that row crew routinely cancel practices when there are swans on the river.
 
2013-05-31 01:09:48 PM

Heathen: Pray 4 Mojo: FTA: "Both had bashes to their beaks which suggested catapults had been used on them."

Is that a thing?

slingshot?


Some sort of armed conflict with those dastardly pigs?
 
2013-05-31 01:10:02 PM
i42.tinypic.com

Begs to differ.
 
2013-05-31 01:10:17 PM
"Both had bashes to their beaks which suggested catapults had been used on them."

A trebuchet, or some sort of torsion-powered device?
 
2013-05-31 01:10:34 PM
Why are people such assholes?  WHY?
 
2013-05-31 01:11:50 PM

jankyboy: brimed03: While Humans simultaneously retain their hold on biggest douchebag species title.

This.


That.
 
2013-05-31 01:12:22 PM
Wow, lot of species self-loathing in this thread already.
 
2013-05-31 01:13:18 PM

studs up: Wow, lot of species self-loathing in this thread already.


except for the turkey vulture, that dude is A OK
 
2013-05-31 01:13:19 PM

sandi_fish: Why are people such assholes?  WHY?


Wait for it... here come all the idiots in defense of Huntin'
 
2013-05-31 01:13:20 PM

Marmanukem: Swans can be terrifying. Teams that row crew routinely cancel practices when there are swans on the river.



And Mute Swans are an invasive species here in the U.S.
 
2013-05-31 01:13:33 PM

Pray 4 Mojo: FTA: "Both had bashes to their beaks which suggested catapults had been used on them."

Is that a thing?


Were they used as ammo for the catapults or were catapults used against the birds? I call fowl either way...
 
2013-05-31 01:14:11 PM
I know swans are the sole property of the Queen, but if it was prince Harry who did this would he get a pass?
 
2013-05-31 01:14:14 PM
In other news: Some people are dicks.
 
2013-05-31 01:14:25 PM
Well, I see that this is our daily announcement of a certain mass awareness phenomenon of a certain ornithological variety. Do you, good sirs, happen to know?
 
2013-05-31 01:14:28 PM
Didn't realize they could even have airguns
 
2013-05-31 01:17:20 PM
Real men hunt with catapults.  Bows are far too accurate.
 
2013-05-31 01:17:34 PM
Badass?  Sure.  Suicidal maniacs?  That too.  They don't give a f*ck.  If they don't like you, they'll straight up brawl with their 7' wingspan and 6", bacteria-infested, razor sharp beaks.  I saw a swan chase a couple around a parking lot for 15 minutes because it felt like it.  Later, I tried using a broom stick to shew him off my porch, but had to back down because that motherfarker was  crazy.
 
2013-05-31 01:18:31 PM
Sympathizes:

images.wikia.com
 
2013-05-31 01:19:13 PM
I'm not sure if a swan could even be in contention for the biggest badass in the bird world title, not having 5 inch claws or a propensity to disembowel perceived threats

www.daddypapersurfer.com
 
2013-05-31 01:19:28 PM

Lor M. Ipsum: Badass?  Sure.  Suicidal maniacs?  That too.  They don't give a f*ck.  If they don't like you, they'll straight up brawl with their 7' wingspan and 6", bacteria-infested, razor sharp beaks.  I saw a swan chase a couple around a parking lot for 15 minutes because it felt like it.  Later, I tried using a broom stick to shew him off my porch, but had to back down because that motherfarker was  crazy.


You should have used a *boom* stick to shew him off.
 
2013-05-31 01:19:32 PM
Another responsible gun owner.
 
2013-05-31 01:20:19 PM

Marmanukem: Swans can be terrifying. Teams that row crew routinely cancel practices when there are swans on the river.


Yep. Swans are d1ckheads.

But I did know one guy with a badass pet eagle owl (rescued injured bird). "Would you mind keeping your dog from trying to attack my owl or I can't be responsible for what my owl does to your dog".
 
2013-05-31 01:21:43 PM

lilbjorn: Another responsible gun owner.


lolwut
 
2013-05-31 01:22:59 PM

opiumpoopy: Marmanukem: Swans can be terrifying. Teams that row crew routinely cancel practices when there are swans on the river.

Yep. Swans are d1ckheads.

But I did know one guy with a badass pet eagle owl (rescued injured bird). "Would you mind keeping your dog from trying to attack my owl or I can't be responsible for what my owl does to your dog".


I don't know why, but, this made me laugh way more than it should have done. Thanks!
 
2013-05-31 01:24:07 PM

squibbits: sandi_fish: Why are people such assholes?  WHY?

Wait for it... here come all the idiots in defense of Huntin'


When swans start killing humans in attacks or cause car fatalities we'll talk.
 
2013-05-31 01:25:55 PM

opiumpoopy: Marmanukem: Swans can be terrifying. Teams that row crew routinely cancel practices when there are swans on the river.

Yep. Swans are d1ckheads.

But I did know one guy with a badass pet eagle owl (rescued injured bird). "Would you mind keeping your dog from trying to attack my owl or I can't be responsible for what my owl does to your dog".


fc05.deviantart.net
 
2013-05-31 01:26:04 PM

Bravo Two: Well, I see that this is our daily announcement of a certain mass awareness phenomenon of a certain ornithological variety. Do you, good sirs, happen to know?


No news from this end, although if  anything passes this way, I'll be sure to communicate it directly.
 
2013-05-31 01:26:16 PM

squibbits: sandi_fish: Why are people such assholes?  WHY?

Wait for it... here come all the idiots in defense of Huntin'


1/10 (1 point for dropping the 'g')
 
2013-05-31 01:26:44 PM

phaseolus: I'm not sure if a swan could even be in contention for the biggest badass in the bird world title, not having 5 inch claws or a propensity to disembowel perceived threats

[www.daddypapersurfer.com image 400x300]


Cassowary FTW. Swans are nasty but next to harmless compared to these vorpal-sword-taloned maniacs.
 
2013-05-31 01:26:57 PM
Yes, swans can be dicks.  They really don't have many options when it comes to defending the water/land they need to live on.

This does not mean shoot them with airguns/slingshots/generally be an ass to them you stupid farkwits.

fark all of you with a rusty, running chainsaw.
 
2013-05-31 01:27:16 PM

give me doughnuts: opiumpoopy: Marmanukem: Swans can be terrifying. Teams that row crew routinely cancel practices when there are swans on the river.

Yep. Swans are d1ckheads.

But I did know one guy with a badass pet eagle owl (rescued injured bird). "Would you mind keeping your dog from trying to attack my owl or I can't be responsible for what my owl does to your dog".

[fc05.deviantart.net image 500x375]


It's funny how owls can be so cute, but still so dangerous.
 
2013-05-31 01:27:23 PM

phaseolus: I'm not sure if a swan could even be in contention for the biggest badass in the bird world title, not having 5 inch claws or a propensity to disembowel perceived threats

[www.daddypapersurfer.com image 400x300]


Another example of "Australia! An entire continent designed to kill you."
 
2013-05-31 01:28:10 PM

KatjaMouse: phaseolus: I'm not sure if a swan could even be in contention for the biggest badass in the bird world title, not having 5 inch claws or a propensity to disembowel perceived threats

[www.daddypapersurfer.com image 400x300]

Another example of "Australia! An entire continent designed to kill you."


Dude, this. Had some friends who lived in Sydney; they had some stories @_@
 
2013-05-31 01:29:59 PM
"Look at these things of beauty."

"Yeah, let's f*ck them up and put them in pain."

"Woo, we are so bad ass!"

Guys?  No, you're not.  You're not the great white hunters.  You're sh*t.  You need meat?  Tescos is open.  You're just lip biting, squinty little cowards out trying to ruin things you can't create or replace.  And one day it will will bite you on your ill-washed asses.
 
2013-05-31 01:30:23 PM
Swans (and, for that matter, geese) get farking nasty when anything gets too close to their young. Try it yourself sometime. No need to do anything cruel: just find a goose with a few babies and sort of saunter vaguely over in that direction.

Once you get close enough, you'll be greeted by thirty-plus pounds of flapping, snapping, hissing berserker birdflesh. It's like they're farking channeling Donald Duck or something, and you will run. Instinct demands it. No one messes with the geese up close.

Which is probably why these people used an air gun. Farking cowards.
 
2013-05-31 01:31:01 PM

syberpud: squibbits: sandi_fish: Why are people such assholes?  WHY?

Wait for it... here come all the idiots in defense of Huntin'


Vegeatarians are the worst trolls.
 
2013-05-31 01:31:10 PM
Swans are assholes.  People who live on the water know this.  Probably had it coming.
 
2013-05-31 01:31:22 PM
Want a hug?
24.media.tumblr.com
(Eurasian Eagle Owl, wingspan up to 2 meters)
 
2013-05-31 01:33:57 PM

Shryke: syberpud: squibbits: sandi_fish: Why are people such assholes?  WHY?

Wait for it... here come all the idiots in defense of Huntin'

Vegeatarians are the worst trolls.


Because they are underformed and malnourished due to lack of protein.
 
2013-05-31 01:34:23 PM

sandi_fish: Why are people such assholes?  WHY?


Pretty much the whole argument is "Why is it a crime to hurt animals?" versus "Why the hell do you feel the need to hurt animals?!"  I don't see a good foundation for making animal abuse criminal; but I do see a good foundation for using it as a bright indicator of terrifying psychological problems and people I generally don't want near me.
 
2013-05-31 01:34:45 PM

Hot Carl To Go: Shryke: syberpud: squibbits: sandi_fish: Why are people such assholes?  WHY?

Wait for it... here come all the idiots in defense of Huntin'

Vegeatarians are the worst trolls.

Because they are underformed and malnourished due to lack of protein.


Only if they're raised vegetarian.
 
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