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(BBC)   Boston bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev walks   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 240
    More: News, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, Dzhokhar, Russian Republic, Tamerlan, Chechen  
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41423 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 May 2013 at 8:39 PM (46 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-05-30 08:56:42 PM
Zubeidat Tsarnaeva said her son told her in a phone call that he and his brother, killed in a police manhunt after the blasts, were innocent.

Surprise, surprise. They got they wrong guys.

So release him already and hope he doesn't sue for too much.

Seriously... with all the police and federal involvement, is it too much to ask that they at least shoot the right guys?

Sheesh!
 
2013-05-30 08:56:47 PM
Very amusing.  Although I dont know why people assumed it was anything than what it was.  I mean... come on.
 
2013-05-30 08:58:58 PM
Good to see he is getting healthy,
It would be a shame to whack him in an Electric Wheel Chair.

I think of him every time I change the Dirt Bag on my vacuum cleaner.
 
2013-05-30 08:59:06 PM
He can walk now? Is he going to start training for next years marathon?

/*slaps self for bad form*
 
2013-05-30 08:59:31 PM

anthonix: OK, Am I and a few others the only ones who got (and laughed at) the brilliance of the headline?


snickered myself
 
2013-05-30 08:59:51 PM

Nothing To See Here: Good to see he is getting healthy,
It would be a shame to whack him in an Electric Wheel Chair.

I think of him every time I change the Dirt Bag on my vacuum cleaner.


Your puns are bad. Vogon level bad.
 
2013-05-30 09:00:14 PM

Heinrich von Eckardt: Zubeidat Tsarnaeva said her son told her in a phone call that he and his brother, killed in a police manhunt after the blasts, were innocent.

Surprise, surprise. They got they wrong guys.

So release him already and hope he doesn't sue for too much.

Seriously... with all the police and federal involvement, is it too much to ask that they at least shoot the right guys?

Sheesh!


Isn't the headline trolltastic enough?
 
2013-05-30 09:00:54 PM

dsriggs: Nothing To See Here: Thank You Capt Obvious, even Helen Keller saw that one coming.

How could she see it from her attic?


She had time to finger it out before flying to the Pacific.
 
2013-05-30 09:00:56 PM
Man, I remember being young and healing fast like that. Damn.
 
2013-05-30 09:01:02 PM

Alonjar: Very amusing.  Although I dont know why people assumed it was anything than what it was.  I mean... come on.

 
2013-05-30 09:01:47 PM

Heinrich von Eckardt: Zubeidat Tsarnaeva said her son told her in a phone call that he and his brother, killed in a police manhunt after the blasts, were innocent.

Surprise, surprise. They got they wrong guys.

So release him already and hope he doesn't sue for too much.

Seriously... with all the police and federal involvement, is it too much to ask that they at least shoot the right guys?

Sheesh!


You know there's video of the gunfight they were in, the night Speedbump died, right?

Of all the things you can do that say "I'm not the perp!", getting into a gun battle with the police is pretty much the last thing on the list.

The guy shooting and saying "you'll never take me alive, Coppers"?... That guy did it.
 
2013-05-30 09:01:51 PM
+1

/but seriously, f*ck you, subby
 
2013-05-30 09:03:26 PM

Paris1127: Mein Mullah, I can valk!

/if he really does walk, we can send him back to Russia
//and they will send him to the Black Dolphin


Why would we send him back to Russia?  Try him here in America and kill him.
 
2013-05-30 09:03:36 PM

Nothing To See Here: dsriggs: Nothing To See Here: Thank You Capt Obvious, even Helen Keller saw that one coming.

How could she see it from her attic?

She had time to finger it out before flying to the Pacific.


what did she have stuck in there?
 
2013-05-30 09:05:01 PM

Nothing To See Here: Good to see he is getting healthy,
It would be a shame to whack him in an Electric Wheel Chair.

I think of him every time I change the Dirt Bag on my vacuum cleaner.


I, for one, hope he isn't given the death penalty.

I hope he lives to regret his actions, and I don't even wish prison rape on him.

I simply hope he comes to understand what he did to murder those people was very wrong, and I hope he regrets what he did. It was so wrong to kill those people, and also to waste his own life & whatever good he could have brought to the world if he didn't choose this path.

Such senseless waste... another death would be regrettable.
 
2013-05-30 09:05:13 PM

scottydoesntknow


On the one hand, that's some damn good headline bait. On the other hand, abuse of the newsflash tag.

I'm torn.


Sew yourself back up: the tag's been changed to 'news'.

And I got a hearty chuckle out of the headline as well.
 
2013-05-30 09:05:25 PM

anthonix: OK, Am I and a few others the only ones who got (and laughed at) the brilliance of the headline?

Good one subby!


I thought it was a BRILLIANT headline.

+eleventy subby.
 
2013-05-30 09:07:12 PM

Paris1127: Mein Mullah, I can valk!


i.imgur.com

Nah, this one requires the pic.
 
2013-05-30 09:08:34 PM
Zubeidat Tsarnaeva said her son told her in a phone call that he and his brother, killed in a police manhunt after the blasts, were innocent.

Hmmm. Zubeidat looks alive to me, iirc the prosecution would not continue if he was not alive.  Don't they require Writing 101 to get a Journalism degree any longer?
 
wee [TotalFark]
2013-05-30 09:08:40 PM

way south: This is a problem we can fix.

[dl.dropboxusercontent.com image 225x225]


Or we can do it like he did it to others:

eartheasy.com
 
2013-05-30 09:09:10 PM
Calling for anyone's death is depraved in any circumstance whatsoever. I have hope that everyone with a problem can be rehabilitated and become a productive member of society. We can't fail to let anyone down.
 
2013-05-30 09:09:31 PM
A+ headline, subby
 
2013-05-30 09:10:07 PM
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-05-30 09:10:20 PM
Subby is trying to have a troll fight with The Onion.
 
2013-05-30 09:13:38 PM
Excellent work submitter. You win a free masturbation. Enjoy.
 
2013-05-30 09:13:41 PM
Nice bit of Trolling there mate :)
 
2013-05-30 09:15:51 PM
I obviously meant "Dzhokhar" instead of his mother.  Post fail.  The point about journalism still stands.
 
2013-05-30 09:16:58 PM

Silent But Deadly: Zubeidat Tsarnaeva said her son told her in a phone call that he and his brother, killed in a police manhunt after the blasts, were innocent.

Hmmm. Zubeidat looks alive to me, iirc the prosecution would not continue if he was not alive.  Don't they require Writing 101 to get a Journalism degree any longer?


They barely require use of the English language. We're lucky all those letters are in sequence and it doesn't say "Tsarneva sed sun told her in call they we're innocent lol!"
 
2013-05-30 09:17:13 PM
Does anyone know if the story about the guy in Orlando getting shot by the FBI made Fark? I submitted a headline at the time, but it was redlit and I was on a work trip so I wasn't watching the greens all that close.

/just curious
 
2013-05-30 09:18:55 PM
Successful headline troll is successful.
 
2013-05-30 09:20:05 PM
I'm stealing that headline and post it to Facebook
/Watching people go crazy without reading it will be worth going to Facebook
 
2013-05-30 09:20:29 PM
He's still alive?
 
2013-05-30 09:20:39 PM

Korzine: video man: Bad subby! This guy is getting the death penalty, regardless of what the court says.

Probably not, chances are he'll end up in ADX Florence.

as a college professor.

he may then even talk about how he didn't do enough.
 
2013-05-30 09:20:59 PM
Well played subby, well played...
 
2013-05-30 09:22:00 PM
i40.tinypic.com
 
pc
2013-05-30 09:23:42 PM
Could someone please enlighten a non native speaker on the trolling issue?

spasiba
 
2013-05-30 09:24:45 PM
Well played, subby, well played.
 
2013-05-30 09:27:20 PM

pc: Could someone please enlighten a non native speaker on the trolling issue?

spasiba


Definition number 7 for the intransitive verb use of "walk" in the Merriam Webster online dictionary.

: to avoid criminal prosecution or conviction <walked on a technicality>
 
2013-05-30 09:29:17 PM
"He didn't hold back his emotions either, as if he were screaming to the whole world: 'What is this? What's happening?'" [Dzhokhar's mom] said.

Heh. Yeah. You know who else feels that way? HIS VICTIMS.

So STFU already.
 
2013-05-30 09:29:57 PM

pc: Could someone please enlighten a non native speaker on the trolling issue?

spasiba


Slang terminology.

If someone "walks", it's like saying he was let out of jail and/or cleared of wrongdoing in the eyes of the law.

Submitter was making a bad pun because Dzokhar was able to physically walk, and people are reacting as if he was set free/held blameless for the bombing in Boston.
 
2013-05-30 09:30:14 PM
Now THAT'S how you troll, folks.

Bravo!
 
2013-05-30 09:32:02 PM

Silent But Deadly: Zubeidat Tsarnaeva said her son told her in a phone call that he and his brother, killed in a police manhunt after the blasts, were innocent.

Hmmm. Zubeidat looks alive to me, iirc the prosecution would not continue if he was not alive.  Don't they require Writing 101 to get a Journalism degree any longer?


Pronoun, antecedent highlighted for your convenience. You're welcome.
 
2013-05-30 09:32:20 PM

12349876: pc: Could someone please enlighten a non native speaker on the trolling issue?

spasiba

Definition number 7 for the intransitive verb use of "walk" in the Merriam Webster online dictionary.

: to avoid criminal prosecution or conviction <walked on a technicality>


No, I don't think that's it since it doesn't make sense.
Isn't it too early for him to "walk" on a technicality?
There has been no trial yet and the prosecution is still pulling together it's case.

I thought the "joke" had to do with him walking out of the hospital.
 
2013-05-30 09:32:47 PM
If we don't already have a "Troll HOTY" category, we need one NOW, and we need to preemptively award the first award in this category to Subby.  Masterfully done.

Subby, out yourself and take a bow!
 
2013-05-30 09:32:47 PM

pc: Could someone please enlighten a non native speaker on the trolling issue?

spasiba


"Walks" in the headline implies, "walks free" as in charges dropped.
 
2013-05-30 09:33:45 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: I thought the "joke" had to do with him walking out of the hospital.


Wow.
 
2013-05-30 09:33:51 PM
Well played, submitter. Well played!
 
2013-05-30 09:34:14 PM
Ya got me! Nice...
 
2013-05-30 09:35:16 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: Isn't it too early for him to "walk" on a technicality?


That was just the example sentence from the dictionary.  Anybody who gets caught up in the legal system and doesn't get prosecuted or convicted could be counted as "walking".  Like suspects who are taken into the station but don't get arrested.  Cop shows say "Let him walk" all the time after they've interviewed a suspect they can't arrest.
 
2013-05-30 09:35:21 PM

netweavr: I'm glad he's recovering. Hopefully he'll show up for his trial in good health.

Then, if the evidence is sufficient, justice can be served.


This. Even though it's hard to know what the facts are given all the misreporting by damn near everybody who can it's hard to imagine he'll be found Not Guilty or that he should be; still, he is a human being and an American citizen, subject like us to the rule of law and not a mob with baseball bats. Justice is not served if even a mass-murdering scumbag is denied a fair trial.

And I'm glad his mother's on his side, even if she might be going a bit overboard in her public statements. It'd be hard to respect a mother who said "Here, kill my son."

Y'all may now carry on showing the world how unfit for democracy Americans still are.
 
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